- 4 minutes ago
She's Not Homeless, She's Healer Goddess! Full EP - Full Movie
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00:00:02Healer Goddess, hear my plea.
00:00:05Please save my child.
00:00:23Rod of a sepulis.
00:00:43Rejuvening.
00:00:51Praise! She is the Healer Goddess!
00:00:55No, please. Don't call me that.
00:00:59I'm just glad I could help.
00:01:05Here you go, miss.
00:01:09Why be weighed down by a throne when I can live amongst the common people and help those the most
00:01:13in need?
00:01:26You must be rushing off to go find your jewels, because only a sackless coward would hit a puppy and
00:01:31run!
00:01:34Aw, it's okay, little guy. I'll fix you right up.
00:01:44Right rewrites the wronged.
00:01:49We're chewing.
00:01:53See? Good as the day you can kick him out of your mother's womb.
00:01:59Come on, Cleo! Let's go!
00:02:11Hey, hey, hey, hey!
00:02:16Please. My brother's been in a coma the last two years.
00:02:21We have no idea what the illness is.
00:02:23If anyone can help cure him, we will pay you handsomely.
00:02:26Be Lysander Armstrong!
00:02:27His military family basically owns the entire global stock market!
00:02:32He's so hot!
00:02:34Does he come with the money?
00:02:35Yes. He'll even marry you if you can cure him.
00:02:38Money. Fame. Power.
00:02:40It's all yours.
00:02:46Are we still moving forward, Miss Trixie?
00:02:48Yes. Give the presidential contract to Marissa.
00:02:52Oh, I have another call coming in.
00:02:55Grandma!
00:02:56I'm dying! Save me, Trixie!
00:03:00Grandma?
00:03:02Grandma.
00:03:03When are you getting married? I'm already a hundred years old.
00:03:07I'm gonna keep you healthy forever, Grandma.
00:03:09And Butch is still on deployment, so that's why I haven't been married yet.
00:03:15Oh, but why marry a vegetable when I can bang a younger stud like you?
00:03:22We're talking about my brother's life. I don't have time for jokes.
00:03:27Oh, no!
00:03:36Please go feed your dog, Miss. Don't let it starve like you.
00:03:39Oh, kind stranger. Let me repay you by granting you a wish.
00:03:44Grant me a wish? That you can barely feed yourself.
00:03:46The downfall of humanity. It all starts with the loss of faith.
00:03:51What?
00:03:53Jeez, this has given me a migraine.
00:03:55Are you telling me to pray to God because we've been doing that?
00:03:58I'm telling you to have some faith in me.
00:04:01Okay.
00:04:03I wish for you to cure my brother's illness.
00:04:06Can you do that?
00:04:07I can topple mountains and make a king out of a frog if I wanted to.
00:04:11Cleo, stay right here for a second.
00:04:14Don't go too far, Cleo.
00:04:18Hold still.
00:04:25What?
00:04:26My migraine's gone.
00:04:28Okay, then let's go.
00:04:29If you can cure my brother, he'll even marry you.
00:04:32Come on. Come on.
00:04:33Oh!
00:04:47How is he?
00:04:48What is the diagnosis?
00:04:50Remember, you will not marry him unless you cure him.
00:04:53I'm sorry. I don't know what this is.
00:04:55Aren't you the queen of medicine?
00:04:57You're supposed to be one of the best.
00:04:59Don't worry, General.
00:05:00I'm the Angel Herbalist and I have mastered all healing methods of the East.
00:05:05I can detect what condition your son has with just one needle.
00:05:26I have no clue what this is.
00:05:30Oh, it looks like the Angel Herbalist doesn't live up to her name after all.
00:05:35That's why we saved the best for last.
00:05:37Me, the witch doctor.
00:05:39I'll save your son, Lysander.
00:05:52He's not budging. There's no movement.
00:05:54Truly, I have saved thousands of patients all over the world, but I don't know what this is.
00:06:01Lord, I've scoured the earth for the best doctors. They've tried all these methods and they've all failed!
00:06:07If we can't save him, there's only one person who can.
00:06:12Who?
00:06:16The goddess of healing.
00:06:19Wait a second. You're not talking about the legendary goddess healing.
00:06:23That's correct. Her right rewrites the rond and her left leaves the bereft. That's her motto.
00:06:31It's what makes her a sage amongst mortals. We are nothing compared to her.
00:06:36She is eccentric and elusive. No one has ever seen her before.
00:06:41If this legendary healer is the only one that can truly save my son, I don't care if I go
00:06:47bankrupt.
00:06:48I will find her. James, come.
00:06:51Put out a bounty to the entire world.
00:06:54Whoever finds the goddess healer will get her five million dollars.
00:06:59There's no need.
00:07:13I'll save your son.
00:07:16Who the hell is she?
00:07:18Dad, she says she can cure Lysander.
00:07:20She's gonna save your brother? Don't be ridiculous.
00:07:23How can this shit-stained hobo cure your brother?
00:07:27Exactly.
00:07:28God, the unemployed are getting crazier and crazier.
00:07:31She's trying to scam her way into marrying the rich.
00:07:34Ew! She even brought a filthy dog with her.
00:07:38I bet it has fleas.
00:07:39That flea-infested dirty thing is your companion.
00:07:44Don't try to steal Lysander Armstrong from us.
00:07:51Don't touch him.
00:07:54They say don't judge a book by its cover.
00:07:56But I can see from all your faces that you've failed.
00:07:59So step aside.
00:08:01I'll take it from here.
00:08:03Could you hold this?
00:08:04Ho, ho, ho, ho.
00:08:05You're not gonna touch my son.
00:08:07I'm the richest tycoon in this country and a former general.
00:08:11I know a gold-digging whore when I see one.
00:08:14I bet she's only here because giving blowjobs on the street corners wasn't paying enough cash.
00:08:20Who knows what an unskilled, poor girl like her would do for some.
00:08:24A skinny-ass beggar trying to take advantage of Lysander Armstrong when he's unconscious?
00:08:30Ew!
00:08:32Disgusting.
00:08:33Go back to being a prostitute.
00:08:35Security!
00:08:35Get this STD-infested peasant out of here now.
00:08:39Let's go.
00:08:40If you throw me out, you're tossing away your son's last chance at life.
00:08:47Sir, we are at our wit's end trying to find a cure for Master Lysander into no avail.
00:08:52Maybe we should give her a try?
00:08:55You can always deal with her later if she turns out to be a fraud.
00:08:58Alright, I'll give you a shot.
00:09:01But I warn you, if you fail, I'll have your and your dog's head mounted on my wall!
00:09:07Is that any way to ask for help?
00:09:10You'd be blessed to have me.
00:09:12And I'm only here to repay your younger son's kindness.
00:09:15But since I'm not welcome here, I'll leave.
00:09:20Devon, come find me when you have a different wish.
00:09:22No, Miss Trixie.
00:09:24My brother is a hero to me.
00:09:26I can't lose him.
00:09:29Well, if he's a hero to you, then that means he must be a good person.
00:09:34My brother is a war hero who single-handedly saved this country from a terrorist attack.
00:09:38Also, he's great with puppies. He'd make a great husband.
00:09:44Who says I want to marry him?
00:09:45As if the number one hottest 30 under 30 would even dream of marrying a penniless bum like you.
00:09:52Only a lunatic would be crazy enough to marry her.
00:09:55I mean, look at her.
00:09:56Even if she cleaned herself up, you couldn't find an ounce of femininity on her.
00:10:01Only those cut from the lowest ranks were bigger over such trivial matters.
00:10:06Continue wasting your time.
00:10:07But I'm saving this patient.
00:10:09What happened?
00:10:19Oh, okay!
00:10:22What?
00:10:22What's happening?
00:10:24What are we doing?
00:10:35What the hell are you doing?
00:10:39I knew she was a perv!
00:10:41She's definitely trying to steal Lysander from us.
00:10:44Do you all not know that sweat can tell you everything that's medically wrong with a patient?
00:10:47Are you insane?
00:10:48Security, smash her face in for licking my son!
00:10:53He's born with congenital heart disease, has a peanut allergy, and the condition he has is called endogenic cryomorphy.
00:10:59Yeah, right!
00:11:01I mean, no way you got all that just from licking him!
00:11:04Oh, okay.
00:11:05I've studied every disease known to man, right?
00:11:07I even have the badge of universal medicine right here.
00:11:11And I've never heard of endo-cryo-what-what?
00:11:18What?
00:11:25Is worth nothing when I have the real thing right here.
00:11:28What?
00:11:29So you think that this crummy walking stick of yours is what, the rod of a sepulius?
00:11:36Why don't you go back to the homeless asylum where you came from if you're going to be this delusional?
00:11:41I agree.
00:11:42I mean, even if she does solve this medical mystery, what is the point of doctors who have studied for
00:11:48years?
00:11:48We are all certified.
00:11:50But Lysander does have congenital heart disease.
00:11:54She's right about everything.
00:11:58Yeah, but if she just throws out a bunch of fake diagnoses, one of them is bound to be right.
00:12:03And again, there is no such thing as endo-cryo-what-what!
00:12:07Endogenic cryomorphine.
00:12:08Oh.
00:12:09And of course none of you have heard of it.
00:12:11Because I just discovered it.
00:12:13This condition only affects those with both CHD and a peanut allergy.
00:12:17The chances are a billion to one.
00:12:19A hundred times rarer than winning the lottery.
00:12:22But lucky for you all, you've hit the jackpot by finding me.
00:12:27What a bunch of baloney.
00:12:28I mean, you wouldn't be homeless if you were actually any good.
00:12:33Precisely.
00:12:34You are just a scamming prostitute.
00:12:36You don't compare to meet us who actually studied real medicine.
00:12:41I bet you were too poor to go to real medical school.
00:12:45Oh, so she went to the stripper circus instead.
00:12:49And now she's here putting on this clown show coming up with fake diseases, which mean nothing if you can't
00:12:56wake him up.
00:12:56Is that supposed to be a challenge?
00:12:59Oh, yeah.
00:13:01If you three incompetent doormats want to show me up, I think you all should grow parts of your brain
00:13:07back.
00:13:07Which, by the way, that condition is called an encephaly.
00:13:11What is that supposed to mean?
00:13:13It means you're being schooled by me, and I'm about to walk all over your medical licensees.
00:13:19Then let's have a bet.
00:13:21If you can't heal him, you'll break your hands.
00:13:26And then you can't pretend to have healing hands anymore.
00:13:30Mm-hmm.
00:13:32Mm-hmm.
00:13:32These hands have saved more lives than all three of you combined.
00:13:37You're that desperate to get rid of your competition, huh?
00:13:40Miss Trixie, don't risk your hands for them.
00:13:43There's too many lives at stake.
00:13:47Don't worry. I got this.
00:13:52It's a deal.
00:13:53I'll save Lysander Armstrong.
00:13:56No one is dying on my watch.
00:14:04Lysander Armstrong has been in a vegetative state for two years.
00:14:11Are you stopping me because you're scared I'd actually succeed?
00:14:15Homeless or not, if you save my son, I'll give you everything.
00:14:27I'll even have Lysander, my heir, marry you.
00:14:30I'm not doing this for the money or for a wealthy husband.
00:14:33I just believe in helping good people and doing the right thing.
00:14:38Prepare a jacuzzi set at exactly 113 degrees Fahrenheit.
00:14:41Wait, wait, wait, wait. What for?
00:14:43Don't listen to her.
00:14:45She probably stinks so bad that she just wants a bath to wash the homeless stench.
00:14:49Don't listen to her.
00:14:50Firstly, this is called greatness.
00:14:53Secondly, even if you drown yourself in plastic surgery, you couldn't get rid of your own ugly moral character.
00:15:01What? Did you just call me?
00:15:05There's a man's life at stake here, and you're standing in my way.
00:15:10Don't don the mantle of doctor when you're only capable of harm.
00:15:14Now stop getting in my way, or I promise you, you will be bubbling at the mouth very soon.
00:15:20Oh, yeah?
00:15:20Yeah, you wanna see real pain? Where's the dog?
00:15:23Well, put down the dog!
00:15:25With pleasure.
00:15:41Left leaves the wrong breath.
00:15:47You don't deserve to call yourself a doctor.
00:15:53She's been poisoned!
00:15:56It was her!
00:15:57Do you see any poison on me?
00:16:00Medicine in the right hands can save lives, but in the wrong hands, it becomes nothing but poison.
00:16:06This bitch isn't good enough to take down the queen of medicine!
00:16:09Do you have one of your antidotes on you?
00:16:11Of course.
00:16:12I've saved entire civilizations with my antidotes.
00:16:16If I wanna save someone, even the Grim Reaper can't stop me.
00:16:35Why is she getting blood?
00:16:37This wasn't supposed to happen!
00:16:38I thought you said even the Grim Reaper can't get in your way.
00:16:42Angel herbalist.
00:16:43This is what I call...
00:16:45Malpractice.
00:16:47This isn't fatal. She'll live.
00:16:50But she deserves a little punishment.
00:16:52Well, where's the jacuzzi I asked for?
00:16:54Jacuzzi is ready?
00:16:55Right this way.
00:16:56Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait!
00:16:58What the hell is going on?
00:16:59You say you want your son to live on to give you tons of grandchildren, don't you?
00:17:03Then stop getting in my way. Every second counts.
00:17:08Let's go for a dip, shall we?
00:17:12Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
00:17:14General Armstrong, your family is the richest and most powerful in the nation.
00:17:19Are you really gonna let this hobo slut touch your son?
00:17:23Hold on. You two are going in there alone?
00:17:27If you don't want these drooling vultures to see your son naked, then sure, invite everyone in.
00:17:33All right. But I warn you, no funny business.
00:18:06Hmm...
00:18:39You really shouldn't leave your precious son in there with that homeless conwoman, General Armstrong.
00:18:43Exactly!
00:18:44What if she gets pregnant by him?
00:18:46She could blackmail you for millions.
00:18:50That's what I would do if I was that poor.
00:18:52And then the Armstrong family will be the laughingstock of the nation, held for ransom by a homeless woman.
00:18:59Dad, you can't seriously be listening to that.
00:19:02We have to have faith.
00:19:04Where did you actually find this low light?
00:19:07Uh, on the streets?
00:19:11Are you shitting me?
00:19:13You found this bum on the streets?
00:19:14Are you nuts?
00:19:15You don't know her.
00:19:16You don't know her background.
00:19:18She could be a psychotic murderer.
00:19:20That is it, General.
00:19:21You have to go in and stop this now!
00:19:22You're right.
00:19:23That's it.
00:19:24I'm shutting down this clown show right now.
00:19:26James, let's go.
00:19:27Yes, sir.
00:19:38I told you all to stay out.
00:19:45This is a critical moment for you.
00:19:47We can't be interrupted.
00:19:48Otherwise, we'd both die.
00:19:54I'm not going to let this homeless hoochie mama trap my son.
00:20:00I'm going to save him myself.
00:20:02No.
00:20:07You see that, General?
00:20:08This isn't just a gull-dicking con woman.
00:20:10This is witchcraft.
00:20:13I know what this is!
00:20:15This is the dark witch.
00:20:17I've heard of her.
00:20:18She uses her dark magic to steal the hearts of young, handsome men,
00:20:23and then she eats them alive!
00:20:24I'm going to kill that bitch before she takes my son.
00:20:27James, get the SWAT team.
00:20:30Yes, sir.
00:20:34You regain consciousness.
00:20:46Help me.
00:20:47I just want to...
00:20:52Something's wrong.
00:20:56You were drunk with an aphrodisiac.
00:20:59Lysander Armstrong and his fortune will soon be mine.
00:21:04That's one more thing I'm saving you from.
00:21:13Sir?
00:21:14The SWAT team is here.
00:21:16Captain Morales.
00:21:18My son is trapped behind there
00:21:21with a devious, man-eating witch.
00:21:24I need you to do whatever you can
00:21:25to tear down that door.
00:21:27Rest assured, General Armstrong.
00:21:29We'll break down that door
00:21:30and bury that bitch alive.
00:21:36Right.
00:21:37He writes the wrong.
00:21:42Human.
00:21:46Who the fuck are you?
00:21:47And why the hell are we naked?
00:21:51Good.
00:21:52You're awake.
00:21:53I'm saving you.
00:21:54Saving me?
00:21:56By bathing with me?
00:21:58Who are you?
00:21:59Your fucking spy?
00:22:00Talk!
00:22:01I swear to God
00:22:02I'll have you arrested for this.
00:22:05You're the one who's trying to kiss me
00:22:07in your stipper.
00:22:10I will never.
00:22:11Oh, really?
00:22:25Look who's guilty now.
00:22:29Look, I don't know what the fuck this is,
00:22:31all right,
00:22:31but it is a biological fact.
00:22:33A man is attracted to a naked woman
00:22:37and her breasts.
00:22:39Science, okay?
00:22:40It just means that my body
00:22:41Oh, shut up.
00:22:41is physically...
00:22:45You're distracting me with your funny.
00:22:47And I'm a professional.
00:22:49I hear Lysander's voice.
00:22:51Captain, do something now.
00:22:52Ready!
00:22:58We're almost there.
00:23:00Aim!
00:23:02Get him, boys.
00:23:04Get him!
00:23:06Fire!
00:23:10Fire!
00:23:25Those amicils.
00:23:27How is this possible?
00:23:29It's not even a scratch.
00:23:31I told you this is dark magic.
00:23:33Of course,
00:23:34your earthly bullets
00:23:35won't do a thing.
00:23:35No.
00:23:36I believe Miss Trixie
00:23:37is a good person.
00:23:39She's not the dark witch.
00:23:40Young Master Armstrong,
00:23:42you are too easily fooled.
00:23:44This homeless psycho
00:23:45doesn't even have the skills
00:23:47to make a living.
00:23:48How is she going to save
00:23:49someone else's life?
00:23:50That's right.
00:23:51The Queen Angel and I
00:23:52are already the top
00:23:53female doctors in the world.
00:23:55If we can't save him,
00:23:57no one can.
00:23:58Except for the goddess healer.
00:23:59Think about it.
00:24:00We heard Lysander's voice.
00:24:02He's been in a coma
00:24:03for two years.
00:24:04Miss Trixie must have
00:24:04woken him up.
00:24:05You're right.
00:24:06This homeless girl
00:24:08is maybe the goddess.
00:24:12Maybe this homeless girl
00:24:14is really the goddess.
00:24:15No!
00:24:15No!
00:24:16Absolutely not.
00:24:17There is no way
00:24:19this hobo girl
00:24:19is better than us.
00:24:21How could you know for sure?
00:24:22Right now,
00:24:23what we need to do
00:24:24is not interrupt
00:24:25Miss Trixie.
00:24:26You're wrong, sir!
00:24:27This homeless snake
00:24:29is using the forbidden techniques
00:24:30on Master Lysander.
00:24:32It's called borderline revival.
00:24:34She uses torturous pain
00:24:36to wake the patient.
00:24:37But only temporarily.
00:24:39It's a trick
00:24:40to pull the wool
00:24:41over your eyes and ears.
00:24:43That means my son
00:24:45is in tremendous pain.
00:24:46I'm going to ask you two
00:24:47to do whatever you can
00:24:49to kill that antler-rod-bearing witch.
00:24:52My son doesn't deserve this.
00:24:54He is dying right now
00:24:55naked in a jacuzzi
00:24:57with a smelly vagrant.
00:24:59Then it looks like
00:24:59it's up to me.
00:25:00The witch doctor.
00:25:02Only I know the right techniques
00:25:04to take her down.
00:25:06My son's life is in your hands.
00:25:09You heal him,
00:25:10I will give you
00:25:10whatever your heart desires.
00:25:13I don't know who you are,
00:25:15but there is no way
00:25:17I am letting you
00:25:17rip my golden bachelor
00:25:19away from me.
00:25:21This is it.
00:25:23The finishing touch.
00:25:24I must now give you
00:25:26the kiss of life.
00:25:27So we can both survive.
00:25:47It's poison gas.
00:25:49The poison gas
00:25:51will smoke them out
00:25:52and end her torture
00:25:53over Master Lysander.
00:25:55Poison gas?
00:25:56My son is in there.
00:25:57You're jeopardizing
00:25:59his life as well.
00:26:00No, don't worry, General.
00:26:01Gold diggers like her
00:26:02only care about themselves.
00:26:05Soon,
00:26:05she'll come out
00:26:06crying to Mommy.
00:26:08Then we can reverse
00:26:08the poison on your son
00:26:10and then he can marry
00:26:11one of us.
00:26:13They really won't stop
00:26:14until they get
00:26:15both of us killed.
00:26:18I made a promise to you
00:26:19that I'd save you.
00:26:21It's now or never.
00:26:35What the hell
00:26:36are they doing in there?
00:26:37It's been over 10 minutes.
00:26:38Wait a second.
00:26:40You don't think
00:26:41that they're...
00:26:42You!
00:26:43You suffocated my brother
00:26:44and Miss Trixie in there!
00:26:45Don't point your fingers
00:26:46at me!
00:26:47If your brother's dead,
00:26:48it's because of that
00:26:49homeless gold digger.
00:26:51Oh my god.
00:26:51Yeah!
00:26:52She's the one
00:26:52who sealed the door shut.
00:26:54I mean,
00:26:55she probably locked
00:26:56themselves in there
00:26:57on accident.
00:26:58Miss Trixie wouldn't
00:26:58have to do that
00:26:59if you weren't trying
00:27:00to sabotage her
00:27:01from saving my brother.
00:27:02This is taking
00:27:03way too long.
00:27:05Captain Morales,
00:27:06it's time to get out
00:27:07the big guns.
00:27:09These bazookas
00:27:10can flatten
00:27:11even a bomb shelter.
00:27:13Bazooka.
00:27:13She won't be able
00:27:14to hide even if
00:27:14she's the devil himself.
00:27:16Crap.
00:27:17Oh my god.
00:27:17Get back, son.
00:27:19Ready.
00:27:21Aim.
00:27:22Oh, shit.
00:27:27Quit your whining
00:27:28and stand down.
00:27:41The parasite's
00:27:43been extracted.
00:27:44Shoot her dead now.
00:27:45Do I need to fix
00:27:46your hearing too?
00:27:47I said stand down.
00:27:50Don't listen to her.
00:27:51She's a fraud.
00:27:52A termite
00:27:53to the field of medicine.
00:27:55I just saved this man
00:27:56that otherwise
00:27:56would have died
00:27:57in your care.
00:27:58If I'm a termite,
00:27:59then you're worse
00:28:01than a disease
00:28:02spreading tick.
00:28:03Wait a second.
00:28:04Are you saying
00:28:05you cured my son?
00:28:06He'll wake
00:28:06in just a moment.
00:28:07You can see
00:28:08for yourself.
00:28:09Well, now you're
00:28:10just asking
00:28:11to be exposed.
00:28:12That is it.
00:28:13No more stalling,
00:28:14General.
00:28:15If you won't punish
00:28:16her,
00:28:16I will.
00:28:21Don't hurt her.
00:28:27He's a cure.
00:28:33His pulse is regular.
00:28:35In fact,
00:28:36it's never been better.
00:28:40There's no sign
00:28:41of illness,
00:28:42infection,
00:28:43or disease.
00:28:51Miss Trixie
00:28:52did it, Dad.
00:28:53Lysander's warm again.
00:28:54He's not cold
00:28:55and pale
00:28:55like before,
00:28:56and his heart
00:28:57is strong.
00:28:58Come,
00:28:59feel it.
00:29:01I saved my son.
00:29:04Next time,
00:29:04don't go seeking
00:29:05medical advice
00:29:06from those
00:29:06with ill will.
00:29:07Your son would
00:29:08have otherwise died
00:29:09by their greedy
00:29:10and unskilled hands.
00:29:12I've learned
00:29:12my lesson.
00:29:13I will not let
00:29:14these two nutjobs
00:29:15ever practice
00:29:16their voodoo
00:29:16voodoo magic again.
00:29:18Wait, wait!
00:29:19No, no!
00:29:19There is only
00:29:20one person
00:29:21in the world
00:29:22who is more skilled
00:29:23in the field of medicine
00:29:24than the queen
00:29:25angel and I.
00:29:28The goddess healer!
00:29:33Could you really
00:29:34be the goddess
00:29:35of healing?
00:29:36But rumor has it
00:29:37that the goddess
00:29:38of healing
00:29:38is well over
00:29:39100 years old
00:29:40and you don't look
00:29:42a day after 20.
00:29:44It doesn't matter
00:29:44who I am.
00:29:45What matters
00:29:46is that the patient
00:29:47is healthy again.
00:29:48Devon,
00:29:49I've repaid your kindness
00:29:50by fulfilling your wish
00:29:50of saving your brother.
00:29:52Take care.
00:29:53No, wait!
00:29:54Miss Trixie,
00:29:55we still haven't fulfilled
00:29:56our promise to you yet.
00:29:57He's right.
00:29:58We are men of our words
00:30:00and as I promised you,
00:30:01my heir, Lysander,
00:30:02would take you as a wife
00:30:03if you cured him
00:30:04and you did just that.
00:30:06Of course,
00:30:07you're welcome
00:30:07to marry me instead.
00:30:08Oh, I really appreciate it
00:30:11but I'm sorry.
00:30:13I, I'm already engaged.
00:30:19Already engaged?
00:30:20I am.
00:30:21I've been patiently
00:30:22awaiting his return
00:30:23from deployment
00:30:23for the last three years
00:30:25and he's coming back today.
00:30:27But don't be disappointed.
00:30:29Really, I'm no one special.
00:30:31I just got lucky
00:30:32with your brother.
00:30:33Some guru taught me
00:30:34that spa water
00:30:35can cure all kinds of ailments.
00:30:36But you're still Lysander's savior.
00:30:38Please,
00:30:39let me give you
00:30:40what I promised.
00:30:41Take the gold.
00:30:42No, really.
00:30:44I don't need anything.
00:30:45I just believe
00:30:46in doing good in the world.
00:30:51Trixie, it's your fiancé.
00:30:53He's back
00:30:54and he says
00:30:55he's breaking up with you.
00:30:58I must go.
00:31:05Hobo close.
00:31:07Halo glow.
00:31:09I bet the goddess healer
00:31:10is just like Miss Trixie.
00:31:12It was just dumb luck.
00:31:14She's even dumber
00:31:15for not accepting
00:31:15his marriage proposal.
00:31:17She could have been
00:31:17the richest woman in the world.
00:31:19Marrying the hottest,
00:31:20most powerful bachelor
00:31:22around.
00:31:25I'm going to marry
00:31:26that homeless woman.
00:31:32Oh my God.
00:31:33I mean,
00:31:34I don't know about
00:31:34that homeless bimbo,
00:31:36but this is godly.
00:31:38No, no, no!
00:31:40No, Lysandre!
00:31:41My third dollar shop
00:31:43was supposed to be mine!
00:31:45I'd so much rather
00:31:47share him with you
00:31:47than let that
00:31:48penniless, ugly bitch have him.
00:31:50You two nutjobs
00:31:51are a disgrace
00:31:52to your profession.
00:31:53Take these two weirdos
00:31:54out of here
00:31:55and revoke their licenses.
00:31:57Wait.
00:31:57No!
00:31:58We're not brides.
00:31:59No, she's just
00:32:00better than us.
00:32:02Oh my God.
00:32:04Oh my God.
00:32:06We were truly blessed
00:32:07to have Miss Trixie here,
00:32:08huh?
00:32:09She's no average Jane.
00:32:10No, she isn't.
00:32:11She said it was
00:32:12just dumb luck.
00:32:13But if she truly
00:32:14had these special skills,
00:32:16why did she wear
00:32:17that shit-stained dress
00:32:18and had an impeccable
00:32:19looking doll?
00:32:20But think about
00:32:20the impenetrable walls.
00:32:21No normal person
00:32:23could have done that.
00:32:23Goddess or not,
00:32:25homeless or not,
00:32:26I don't care.
00:32:26I have never met
00:32:27a woman like that.
00:32:28I have to find her.
00:32:29I have to make her my life.
00:32:31She won my heart over, too.
00:32:32But if my bestest
00:32:33big bro wants her,
00:32:35I'll help you find her.
00:32:36All right, listen.
00:32:38I need help.
00:32:38I need three wedding gifts.
00:32:45I'm dumping Trixie,
00:32:46so I want you,
00:32:47your granddaughters,
00:32:49filthy things
00:32:50out of my house
00:32:52now.
00:32:53Trixie paid for this house.
00:32:55She waited for you
00:32:56for three years.
00:32:58She was dumb enough
00:32:59to put my name
00:33:00on the lease.
00:33:00And I'm upgrading
00:33:01for a better girlfriend now,
00:33:02one with some serious
00:33:03fuck you money.
00:33:05So get lost.
00:33:07Who gave you permission
00:33:08to bark like a rabbit hyena
00:33:10in my house?
00:33:16Grandma.
00:33:17Beatrice, Trixie,
00:33:20Amore.
00:33:21I've been dying
00:33:21to throw this
00:33:22in your face.
00:33:23I'm dumping you
00:33:24for your best friend,
00:33:25Marissa.
00:33:27In fact,
00:33:28the wedding's tomorrow,
00:33:30so sign over
00:33:31the house
00:33:31now.
00:33:37You gave me this ring
00:33:38and asked me to wait.
00:33:40And I did.
00:33:41For three years
00:33:43while you were deployed.
00:33:44Yet you cheat on me
00:33:45with my best friend,
00:33:47and now you're trying
00:33:48to swindle my home?
00:33:50Do you have no shame?
00:33:51We were together
00:33:52for three years
00:33:53and it was a complete
00:33:54waste of my life
00:33:55when I could have been
00:33:56with a loaded girl
00:33:57like Marissa.
00:34:03That's how much
00:34:04you would owe me
00:34:04if I was in the
00:34:05rent-a-boyfriend business.
00:34:09I see you're fulfilling
00:34:10your highest aspirations
00:34:11of being a low-grade
00:34:13male prostitute.
00:34:17Oh, yeah?
00:34:19Well, Marissa,
00:34:21Marissa is so much
00:34:22better than you.
00:34:23She grew up
00:34:24even poorer than you
00:34:26and now she's the CEO
00:34:28of an entire corporation.
00:34:31Dude!
00:34:32Oh!
00:34:33And you?
00:34:35You're still nothing.
00:34:37So you think
00:34:38she's an upgrade?
00:34:39Of course she's an upgrade.
00:34:42Look what she got me
00:34:43for my engagement.
00:34:45Oops.
00:34:47Yeah.
00:34:48That's maybe worth
00:34:49one millionth
00:34:50the presidential contract
00:34:51I gave her.
00:34:57You gave her
00:34:58the presidential contract?
00:34:59I certainly did.
00:35:01In fact,
00:35:02Marissa,
00:35:03you and your dimwit brother
00:35:05only have everything
00:35:06you have
00:35:07all thanks to me.
00:35:13Oh, I think she's losing it, bro.
00:35:15That breakup must have
00:35:16hit her hard.
00:35:18You two
00:35:18are the ungrateful
00:35:20cheating scum here.
00:35:22My granddaughter
00:35:22supported you
00:35:24and your entire family
00:35:26for three years
00:35:27while you were gone.
00:35:28How dare you insult her?
00:35:31It's okay, Grandma.
00:35:32Let's not stoop
00:35:33to that level.
00:35:35Poor Edna.
00:35:36She still doesn't know
00:35:37what you're doing
00:35:37out there on the streets, huh?
00:35:39What is he talking about,
00:35:40Jersey?
00:35:41Show her, Bob.
00:35:47This is how
00:35:48embarrassingly useless
00:35:49your granddaughter is.
00:35:50She didn't purchase
00:35:51this house on her own.
00:35:52She was begging
00:35:53on the street
00:35:54for money.
00:35:56I can't be caught
00:35:57with a piss-poor
00:35:58nobody like you.
00:35:59Even if you got no game,
00:36:01I got street cred
00:36:02I got out of keep.
00:36:03You dig?
00:36:04The word you're looking
00:36:04for is dignity.
00:36:06And you're one to speak,
00:36:08cheater.
00:36:10Is this true, Trixie?
00:36:15I've been broadening
00:36:16my horizons, Grandma.
00:36:17I want to see how
00:36:18regular, everyday people
00:36:20live so that I can
00:36:21help them.
00:36:22Of course,
00:36:23those without substance
00:36:25underneath would never
00:36:26understand that.
00:36:27What is that supposed
00:36:28to mean?
00:36:28It means the new
00:36:30girlfriend you think
00:36:30is an upgrade
00:36:32is actually a downgrade.
00:36:37Enough bullshitting
00:36:38already.
00:36:39Just sign the damn
00:36:39papers and we can each
00:36:40get on with our lives.
00:36:54At your wedding, I will.
00:36:56What?
00:36:57If you won't do good
00:36:58by me of breaking things
00:37:00off before two-timing me
00:37:01with my best friend,
00:37:03why should I do good
00:37:04by you?
00:37:05I'll give you my
00:37:06John Hancock at your
00:37:07wedding as a charity
00:37:09to you.
00:37:10Fucking bitch!
00:37:11You better keep your word.
00:37:13Oh, that's rich.
00:37:15After tomorrow, you will
00:37:16never feel so rich ever
00:37:17again.
00:37:18Do you remember that?
00:37:25Trixie, Marissa's a
00:37:27millionaire now.
00:37:29They'll destroy you if you
00:37:30show even so much as a
00:37:32hair at their wedding.
00:37:33Grandma, I have to
00:37:35confess something to you.
00:37:36I've secretly amassed a
00:37:38fortune worth trillions.
00:37:40Trillions?
00:37:43That would make you the
00:37:45richest person on the
00:37:47planet.
00:37:47It's because of the
00:37:48healing hands I inherited
00:37:49from Asseplius, the god
00:37:51of healing.
00:37:52I've saved several world
00:37:54leaders with these hands.
00:37:56That's how I was able to
00:37:57give Marissa the
00:37:58presidential contract and
00:38:00become the goddess healer.
00:38:01It makes me angrier hearing
00:38:03her name knowing how she
00:38:04betrayed you.
00:38:05But please, Trixie dear,
00:38:08I know it was to broken
00:38:09your heart, but embellishing
00:38:12your worth and who you
00:38:13are, it will only delay the
00:38:16healing process.
00:38:17You don't have to believe me
00:38:18just yet.
00:38:19After we lost mom and dad
00:38:21because we didn't have the
00:38:22money for their medical
00:38:23bills, I vowed that I would
00:38:26do everything I can to serve
00:38:27those in need.
00:38:29And that's why I'm taking
00:38:30everything back from Butch
00:38:31and I'm giving it back to
00:38:32charity.
00:38:33You've always had an angel's
00:38:34heart.
00:38:35I'm certain you will meet
00:38:37someone who will treat you
00:38:38right, who actually deserves
00:38:40you.
00:38:41You will see tomorrow,
00:38:43grandma.
00:38:51You said Trixie's
00:38:52crashing your wedding?
00:38:53She was bullying us too,
00:38:55Sasa.
00:38:55She's probably trying to
00:38:57extort you now that she knows
00:38:58you're rich as fuck.
00:39:00When nobody steps on Snake,
00:39:02Snake bites back hard.
00:39:04So let her come and embarrass
00:39:06herself.
00:39:07You mean, we broadcast that
00:39:13video of me?
00:39:16Yes.
00:39:17Her cavewoman's take the
00:39:1819th century tin can.
00:39:20She'll prop me up higher on my
00:39:21pedestal and the whole world
00:39:22sees her in her homeless mess
00:39:24against my presidential glow up.
00:39:26Let's turn this party into her
00:39:28funeral.
00:39:35There he is.
00:39:38Welcome home, brother.
00:39:40Welcome home, General!
00:39:44Sir, the homeless woman who
00:39:46saved you, Miss Trixie, this is
00:39:47the file of her ex, Butch
00:39:49Tanner.
00:39:49He served with your regiment in
00:39:51the Marines.
00:39:51You mean the Butch Tanner that
00:39:52can barely carry supplies?
00:39:54Well, she's been providing for
00:39:55him and his entire family while
00:39:56he's been deployed overseas,
00:39:57sir.
00:39:58So she waited for him for
00:39:59years and then he betrayed her.
00:40:01Fucking coward.
00:40:02According to intel, she's
00:40:03planning to bring it down on
00:40:04them at their wedding.
00:40:05Then we should join her.
00:40:08Men, I'm only alive today
00:40:09because of that virtuous woman
00:40:11and her incredible power that
00:40:12saved my life.
00:40:13So she needs our support.
00:40:15Will you join me in protecting
00:40:16her?
00:40:16Yes, sir!
00:40:17We will learn our lives to
00:40:18protect her, sir!
00:40:20Then let's roll.
00:40:36Welcome, everyone, to my wedding.
00:40:39Today is a very special day for
00:40:40me and Butch.
00:40:41Not only are we getting married,
00:40:42but in just one hour, my company
00:40:44will be receiving the
00:40:45presidential contract, allowing
00:40:46my biomedical company to go
00:40:48public.
00:40:53congratulations on the contract
00:40:54once again, Mrs.
00:40:55Wakeham.
00:40:56Stowe, butch is taking my last
00:40:58name.
00:40:59Oh, and please don't be so uptight,
00:41:00Secretary Cho.
00:41:02You are the secretary of the
00:41:03entire U.S.
00:41:04health department, but this is a
00:41:05partay after all.
00:41:07I see some of the most
00:41:08important people in the nation
00:41:10have also arrived to
00:41:11celebrate you.
00:41:13The U.S. president will also
00:41:16be arriving soon to give you
00:41:18the contract herself.
00:41:19It's an honor.
00:41:20And that's why Sasa is the
00:41:22best wife a man could ever
00:41:23dream of.
00:41:25We will make sure the crowd
00:41:27is entertained tonight.
00:41:28We'll let the wedding begin.
00:41:32Not so fast.
00:41:33The party doesn't start until I
00:41:36say it does.
00:41:58You two really are a match made
00:42:00in hell.
00:42:01So I've come to save your
00:42:02guests from this oncoming train
00:42:04wreck.
00:42:04I don't recognize it from any of
00:42:06our elite circles.
00:42:07Who is she?
00:42:08This is our entertainment for
00:42:10tonight, sir.
00:42:11Just watch.
00:42:15Trixie, what are you doing
00:42:16here?
00:42:16This isn't the homeless shelter.
00:42:17You lost.
00:42:18I bet she's here to bum a meal
00:42:20off us.
00:42:20You know, being this poor.
00:42:24Me, bum a meal.
00:42:26Have you forgotten that it was I
00:42:27who bankrolled you two for the
00:42:29last three years?
00:42:30And what evidence do you have
00:42:31love of that?
00:42:32Look at me, then go look at
00:42:33yourself in the mirror.
00:42:34I'm a millionaire CEO.
00:42:37Even the first woman president
00:42:38will be here any second now to
00:42:40congratulate me.
00:42:41And you're nothing but a washed up
00:42:42sewer rat.
00:42:44Sasa, she's like so obsessed with me.
00:42:46She's like so obsessed with me.
00:42:48See, everyone?
00:42:50Butch already cut ties with his ex,
00:42:52but she's so shameless and desperate
00:42:54that she'd still show up to my wedding
00:42:56to suck up to me.
00:42:58This is what poor, sad girls do.
00:43:00They beg for scraps from us,
00:43:03the rich and glorious.
00:43:05Projecting much, Marissa?
00:43:06You might feel all high and mighty
00:43:08now, but don't bite the hand
00:43:09that feeds you.
00:43:11Especially when I'm the one
00:43:12who's giving you the contract.
00:43:19You giving me the contract?
00:43:21You have no skills, no education,
00:43:24no connection.
00:43:25So how could you possibly have a pool
00:43:27to get the U.S. fucking president
00:43:29to give me a billion dollar contract?
00:43:32We both share humble beginnings, Marissa.
00:43:34And I saw potential in you.
00:43:36Even trusted you as my best friend.
00:43:38But I recognize now that greed
00:43:40has poisoned you.
00:43:42Don't be all sore now
00:43:43just because I stole your man.
00:43:45This is what us rich girls do.
00:43:47They steal from lame spinsters for fun.
00:43:50Damn right.
00:43:51You were too embarrassing for me.
00:43:55Sasa tramples you any day.
00:43:57I can say that now
00:43:58that I'm marrying the rich.
00:44:00Bravo.
00:44:01Self-admission of a gold digger.
00:44:02Quick, somebody put that on a memoir.
00:44:04Sasa, she's embarrassing me
00:44:05in front of everyone.
00:44:07She'll make her sup.
00:44:08Don't listen to her, everyone.
00:44:09She's the gold-dicking, blood-sucking leech.
00:44:12I don't even have to lift a finger
00:44:14and you're already embarrassing yourself
00:44:15in front of everyone for me, butch.
00:44:18You may look and sound like a man,
00:44:21but you're nothing but a pathetic coward.
00:44:23Okay, enough!
00:44:24You know what I always couldn't stand about you?
00:44:26Your moral posturing.
00:44:28But guess what?
00:44:30Morals are just lies
00:44:31to make you lame girls
00:44:32feel better about yourselves.
00:44:33That's why no man will choose you
00:44:35over Marissa Trixie.
00:44:37Because I've got the material goods.
00:44:39You're just all empty talk.
00:44:41I'm not here to request to be chosen
00:44:42because I'm the one
00:44:44who's doing the choosing.
00:44:47See this?
00:44:56Oh my god.
00:45:01Is that the billion-dollar contract for Sasa?
00:45:06The one that's supposed to make us all rich as fuck?
00:45:09No, absolutely not.
00:45:10I don't believe it.
00:45:12You all sound so scared already.
00:45:14Don't worry.
00:45:15This isn't that contract.
00:45:17It's the lease to the modest home
00:45:19you try to swindle from me.
00:45:23See everyone?
00:45:24She's just trying to bluff us.
00:45:26But you don't even have the guts
00:45:27to go all the way.
00:45:28Look at her following orders.
00:45:29I asked her to sign over the lease
00:45:31and here she is.
00:45:32Like a good little peasant slave.
00:45:35That house is worth all her life savings.
00:45:40Do you want to, uh, I don't know,
00:45:42beg for a little treat while you're at it?
00:45:46Oh!
00:45:54You must understand me.
00:45:56I'm here to take back everything I've ever given you.
00:45:59I'm giving it to charity.
00:46:00Oh!
00:46:01Oh!
00:46:07Bro!
00:46:08She's gone cuckoo in the head.
00:46:10She thinks that just because she rented a pretty little dress
00:46:12she can pretend to be a deep pocket-invested baddie.
00:46:15You wish you had that kind of money
00:46:16to just toss away, Trixie.
00:46:18It's just a drop in the bucket for me.
00:46:20Uh, I-I know what this is.
00:46:22You've gone delusional.
00:46:24And you think you're Cinderella
00:46:25so you can just show up to a fancy party
00:46:27and some Prince Charming
00:46:29will scoop you into money forever?
00:46:30Well, that's not happening.
00:46:32Security!
00:46:33Lock the doors.
00:46:34This woman doesn't leave
00:46:35until we're through with her.
00:46:39This is where your dreams will die, bitch.
00:46:45We found Miss Trixie Lysander.
00:46:47She's being cornered by her ex and his mistress
00:46:48at the Wickham wedding right now.
00:46:50Butch Tanner.
00:46:51Well, he's gonna wish he died in battle
00:46:52after I'm done with him.
00:46:54Let's go.
00:46:59You think a few toy guns scare me, Marissa?
00:47:01I've saved plenty of people for much worse.
00:47:05Including your head of command, Butch.
00:47:08General Lysander Armstrong.
00:47:10You mean the legendary war hero?
00:47:12He's been in a coma for years
00:47:14after he saved the nation from a terrorist attack.
00:47:16You're an unskilled, unemployed, ugly leech.
00:47:20So how could you possibly have this magical ability
00:47:23to heal someone like General Lysander Armstrong?
00:47:26No one here is gonna believe you.
00:47:27If you really cured the incurable general,
00:47:30then Sasa is the fucking Virgin Mary.
00:47:32And she's not.
00:47:33You're just asking to be humiliated, Trixie.
00:47:37Show them, Butch.
00:47:43See for yourselves, everyone.
00:47:46Trixie's just a freeloading beggar.
00:47:51She won't leave me and Marissa alone
00:47:53because we're rich as fuck now.
00:47:55I'm a major in the Marines.
00:47:57Sasa, she has a billion-dollar biomedical contract
00:48:01with the military.
00:48:03Approved by the first female president
00:48:06of the United States herself, bitch.
00:48:08How despicable.
00:48:09She's just trying to leech off you
00:48:11like a parasitic gold digger.
00:48:13Get out of here.
00:48:14No one wants to marry you.
00:48:15No free meals for the poor.
00:48:17Do you see this, Trixie?
00:48:19This is high society.
00:48:21So you're either born on a silver spoon
00:48:23or you're as accomplished as me to be here.
00:48:26Maybe if you do some serious dick-sucking here,
00:48:29maybe someone will drop a couple bucks in your tin can.
00:48:35I already have everything one can dream of.
00:48:37But I valued our friendship, Marissa,
00:48:39which is why I came here to give you a second chance.
00:48:42To see if you'd apologize and admit to your backstabbing.
00:48:45But no.
00:48:46You stooped so low.
00:48:48It disgusts me.
00:48:50Nothing is more disgusting
00:48:51than you standing on street corners like a bum.
00:48:54And who knows
00:48:55if you've already started offering sexual services.
00:48:59Well then,
00:49:01why don't you get on your knees for me, Trixie?
00:49:03My brother will never take you back.
00:49:06No man will marry an embarrassment like you.
00:49:09But make me happy,
00:49:11and I might consider making you my personal prostitute.
00:49:16Oh!
00:49:25How dare you hit my brother!
00:49:27I'm never letting you leave here alive!
00:49:30Please, I'll do something.
00:49:32Don't worry, my dear.
00:49:34After I'm done with you, Trixie,
00:49:35not even the goddess of healing will be able to save you.
00:49:40Oh, is that so?
00:49:42Security!
00:49:44Get down on your knees
00:49:46and give Bob one hell of a blowjob
00:49:48in front of everybody here,
00:49:50or I'll pop so many holes in you,
00:49:52the men here won't know which one to fuck.
00:49:54I don't need to be the goddess of anything to punish you.
00:49:57Any of the powerful leaders I've saved before
00:49:59could crush you
00:50:00before you even touch me.
00:50:02Dream on!
00:50:04You wish General Lysander scooped you off your feet,
00:50:07but you weren't good enough for me.
00:50:08You're definitely not good enough for him.
00:50:10Enough!
00:50:12You're souring my party,
00:50:13so you either get the fuck out,
00:50:16or I'm gonna shoot you.
00:50:18On the count of three!
00:50:20I think I quite like it here.
00:50:21Two!
00:50:33This wine is so delicious.
00:50:36One!
00:50:37Shoot!
00:50:40Nobody is laying a hand on my future wife.
00:50:49It's...
00:50:50It's...
00:51:01Who the hell is this?
00:51:06I'm sorry that I'm late.
00:51:07Did they hurt you?
00:51:09No, I'm fine.
00:51:11But, um,
00:51:12when did I become your future wife?
00:51:15You saved me, Trixie, remember?
00:51:18I'm a man of my word.
00:51:20They're never gonna hurt you ever again.
00:51:22Really, it was nothing.
00:51:25I saved you because you're a good man,
00:51:27not because I want you to owe me any favors.
00:51:35I see what this is.
00:51:36You're the one who cheated on me, Trixie.
00:51:38Look at you guys, a lovely dove.
00:51:40Don't try to pin this on her.
00:51:42She waited for you for three years.
00:51:43This is the kind of woman of virtue that a man would die for.
00:51:48Virtue?
00:51:50Don't make me laugh.
00:51:51She's probably out there giving blowjobs for cash.
00:51:54No man who, in a hundred foot pole, would want to touch her.
00:51:58She should be happy Bob was willing to give her some.
00:52:05I see her in the Marines.
00:52:08I'm a major.
00:52:09You know, look man,
00:52:11I know Trixie is like a, I don't know, like a seven.
00:52:14Now that she's all cleaned up,
00:52:16but don't waste your manhood on that whiny, worthless woman like that.
00:52:20Ow!
00:52:22Ow!
00:52:23Ow!
00:52:25A real man
00:52:27Never talks about a woman that way.
00:52:29You're a coward.
00:52:40We don't need to fight fire with fire to deal with the likes of them.
00:52:44You're very gracious, Trixie, you know that?
00:52:49You're only getting off with it because she's so kind,
00:52:51so you're going to do me the favor of never coming near her again.
00:52:53You understand?
00:52:54You want to fuck with me, you little dipshit?
00:52:56I'm a fucking major.
00:52:58You're probably lowest rank of the military grunts.
00:53:01I'll, I'll destroy you.
00:53:03Do you really not know who this is, Butch?
00:53:05I thought you were in the Marines.
00:53:07What have you been doing this whole time
00:53:08if you don't know who this war hero is?
00:53:11He was just a supply boy.
00:53:15War hero?
00:53:17Is this all part of your plan, Trixie?
00:53:20Poor girl.
00:53:21Did you sell your house to hire this actor
00:53:23so you can feel better about yourself?
00:53:25A woman's worth is tied to the man she marries.
00:53:28Trixie is worthless
00:53:29because that guy looks like a cowboy.
00:53:34A bum girl and a pimp.
00:53:36What a pair.
00:53:38Seems like they don't know who you are
00:53:39since you've been out of action for so long.
00:53:42Maybe we should try to face them off some more.
00:53:44Don't you think?
00:53:46Bring in the wedding gifts.
00:53:55What is all this?
00:53:57Trixie, listen.
00:53:57I know that you didn't ask for anything
00:53:59after you saved my life.
00:54:01But I know that we shared a moment.
00:54:06I'm not the kind of man
00:54:07to get close to a woman
00:54:08and then just disappear.
00:54:10It's not in my nature.
00:54:12I'm like somebody else here.
00:54:14Listen, Trixie.
00:54:16I have never met a woman
00:54:20like you.
00:54:22So incredible and kind and beautiful.
00:54:25So I know that you're the one for me.
00:54:29This guy's either nuts
00:54:31or a really, really good actor.
00:54:34Oscar worthy.
00:54:35Oscar worthy.
00:54:36No.
00:54:37First gift.
00:54:43Trixie, I know that you just lost your home.
00:54:46So I'm gifting you with your own new mansion.
00:54:50Worth $500 million.
00:54:51Previously owned by Jennifer Aniston.
00:54:55Second gift.
00:54:58This contains all the rights
00:55:00to my entire fortune,
00:55:03which is now yours.
00:55:04Entire fortune from a cowboy actor?
00:55:07It must be pennies.
00:55:08They already spent their entire life savings
00:55:10on this clown show.
00:55:11They've got nothing left.
00:55:13Lysander,
00:55:14I really don't care for any of us.
00:55:15No, look.
00:55:16I know.
00:55:17I know that you are the farthest thing
00:55:19from a material woman.
00:55:20Okay?
00:55:21Which is exactly why
00:55:22my third gift
00:55:24is, um,
00:55:26well,
00:55:26I know that you are the most
00:55:54I'm not going to be the best
00:56:00will you marry me
00:56:03you know I can't say no to this doggo
00:56:09yes
00:56:10I will marry you
00:56:27go go power couple
00:56:31okay stop
00:56:32the only power couple here is Butch and I
00:56:36let's remind everyone how worthless Trixie is
00:56:40no man in their right mind
00:56:43would marry that embarrassing sack of scraps
00:56:46hey
00:56:47I don't care if she's homeless or not
00:56:48but I'm making this woman my wife
00:56:50which means that she will be treated as
00:56:53and cherished as the most precious woman on earth
00:56:55understand
00:57:00you still don't realize
00:57:02that my brother is the most powerful man on earth
00:57:05this is General Lysander Armstrong
00:57:15as if
00:57:16like the almighty General Lysander Armstrong
00:57:19would propose to a homeless prostitute like Trixie
00:57:22yes
00:57:23the Armstrong family basically controlled the global stock
00:57:25market
00:57:26Lysander Armstrong would sooner marry the princess of England than someone from the lowest rank of society
00:57:31I bet my life you're all just
00:57:34actors
00:57:34then you better enjoy your last breath
00:57:36come on Lysander what are we waiting for
00:57:38let's show them what we can do and get revenge for Trixie
00:57:40what can a bunch of piss poor people do to us
00:57:42the elites
00:57:44infect us with your poor people bad luck
00:57:46she wishes
00:57:47she could blame her low status on bad luck
00:57:49truth is she's just a useless
00:57:52lazy bitchin bum
00:57:54she's utterly
00:57:55unmarriable
00:57:58I can dispose of them in other means if you don't prefer violence
00:58:02I'd handle them myself but
00:58:06I'll let you do all the heavy lifting
00:58:09go ahead Lysander
00:58:17yes hello this is Lysander please
00:58:19bankrupt Marissa Wickham for me
00:58:22oh my gosh I'm so scared
00:58:24anyone these days could call anyone and pretend to be on the phone
00:58:34uh hello
00:58:36yes
00:58:39what
00:58:44I'm not bankrupt
00:58:53hey hey
00:58:55are you sure that was the call Sasa?
00:58:57that was a real call?
00:58:59people don't just suddenly go bankrupt like that
00:59:01my company's dead
00:59:03evaporated
00:59:03it's in thin air
00:59:08that's impossible
00:59:10who are you?
00:59:11what did you do?
00:59:13secretary Cho
00:59:13you said you're the secretary of health right?
00:59:16and you yourself said that the Armstrong family owns the entire global stock market
00:59:20could that be how they bankrupted miss Wickham?
00:59:23then that means
00:59:27you're really Lysander Armstrong
00:59:29the richest and most powerful man in the country
00:59:33Trixie's married
00:59:34the famed war hero
00:59:36the man every girl wants and every man wants to be
00:59:41now you believe me?
00:59:43those who do bad will always end up losing everything
00:59:46there's got to be some trick to this
00:59:48you guys are just bums trying to extort money from us
00:59:50it's awesome
00:59:59I know why you're all over Trixie
01:00:02because you've been in the military for so long
01:00:04and you don't know what a real woman can do for you.
01:00:07Let me take you to my wedding chamber
01:00:09and I'll show you a good time.
01:00:12Do you have your hands for me
01:00:14or I'll have them removed for you.
01:00:20I would never be interested in a woman
01:00:22who's as vile and cruel and wicked as you are.
01:00:26Guess the cheater gets cheated on eventually.
01:00:31Sasa was just trying to save the company.
01:00:34I don't blame her at all.
01:00:35Your double standards are incredible.
01:00:37Okay, you don't want me, fine.
01:00:40But there's plenty of other efficiency.
01:00:42I can give you a room full of pageant winners.
01:00:4418 years old, fresh for the taking.
01:00:54I did that so you wouldn't have to, Miss Trixine.
01:00:57Thank you, Devon.
01:00:59Marissa, not only have you backstabbed me,
01:01:02your best friend, by stealing my fiance,
01:01:06but now you'd sell out other innocent girls
01:01:08just to get your company back?
01:01:10You're an insult to all good women out there.
01:01:12No, to all of humanity.
01:01:13So now, everything that I've ever given you to,
01:01:17I'm taking it all back.
01:01:20Wait, everyone, stop.
01:01:25They're imposters.
01:01:30I just got off the phone with the president and she said your contract is not getting canceled because it
01:01:35was assigned by the goddess healer herself.
01:01:37So we won't go bankrupt?
01:01:40The goddess healer?
01:01:41You mean the eccentric and highly elusive sage in the field of medicine approved of my biomedical products?
01:01:47Yes, that's the highest honor anyone can have in the field of health and medicine.
01:01:51The goddess healer's motto is the right rewrites the wrong, the left leave the wrong bereft.
01:01:58That means she's rewarding me.
01:02:00The president would never let your company go bankrupt.
01:02:04In fact, she's on her way now.
01:02:07So you're telling me this dashingly handsome motherfucker over here isn't Lysander Armstrong?
01:02:14Who the fuck cares who he is?
01:02:15If the president and the goddess healer approves of my product, who cares about this washed-up war hero?
01:02:21We can break his legs, break his arms, no one would even bat an eye.
01:02:24She even gave us explicit permission to call upon secret services.
01:02:28FBI!
01:02:30FBI!
01:02:31You're under arrest for fraudulent claims and identity theft.
01:02:36Gotcha.
01:02:41Guess I still get the last laugh, Trixie.
01:02:44No, don't arrest her.
01:02:46Trixie is a good person.
01:02:48Please, officer, don't arrest her.
01:02:49Grandma, Mr. Rogers, Mrs. Williams, what are you all doing here?
01:02:54The neighbors heard about the break-up between you and Butch.
01:02:57We were worried, so we came here to back you up.
01:03:00Listen, officer, I can attest that Trixie Amoria is a good neighbor.
01:03:05She's very kind-hearted and would never break the law.
01:03:08Yes, and one time when my daughter needed university tuition, Trixie gave her everything she had just to help her
01:03:14out.
01:03:15She also paid for my recent heart surgery as well.
01:03:17My fiancé really is an incredible woman.
01:03:21She's an angel descended from heaven.
01:03:28You must be the criminal pretending to be General Lysander Armstrong.
01:03:32My brother is not a criminal.
01:03:34He's a war hero who single-handedly saved this country from a terrorist attack.
01:03:38Without him, this whole country would have been bombed to ash.
01:03:41And that's why it's twice the crime for stealing his identity.
01:03:45General Lysander Armstrong only fell into a coma because of the fight with the terrorist.
01:03:49And we've received no word that he's woken up yet, so this must be an imposter.
01:03:54I can tell that this whole dilemma with my identity is causing you a lot of trouble.
01:03:58But I promise I'll get it resolved and we can focus on taking down your scumbag ex.
01:04:04If you wanna arrest me, fine.
01:04:07But don't fuck with my fiancé.
01:04:08You don't get to decide, punk.
01:04:10Let's go!
01:04:34Get him!
01:04:35If you can.
01:04:47ah
01:04:49ah
01:04:54ah
01:04:55ah
01:04:55ah
01:04:56ah
01:05:05Oh, my God.
01:05:27Is that enough pain, or do you want more?
01:05:37Legend is written all over you, Lysander.
01:05:42Grandma, meet my new fiancé.
01:05:48Wow, your new fiancé? He's so manly.
01:05:52Much better than your last one.
01:05:54I always knew you'd find someone better.
01:05:57It's Butch's loss.
01:05:59Trixie has always been so much better than Marissa.
01:06:02She's like a shining star in the sky,
01:06:04and Marissa's like a roach in the sewers.
01:06:07Bitch, we name-calling now?
01:06:09I'll drown you out with insults from my side, right, fam?
01:06:12Drown out the poor!
01:06:13Drown out the poor!
01:06:15Drown out the poor!
01:06:16Drown out the poor!
01:06:18Drown out the poor!
01:06:19Drown out the poor!
01:06:20See, Trixie? You've got no connections,
01:06:23no power.
01:06:24You can't compete against me,
01:06:26even if you have one guy on your side who can fight.
01:06:28We're too honorable to fight dirty like you.
01:06:30So you're using defenseless lives as your shield,
01:06:33because you know we won't hurt them.
01:06:35Let them eat cake!
01:06:36Hmm.
01:06:46You can't shoot all of them.
01:06:48Grab what you can't, fam.
01:06:49Attack!
01:07:06You will not hurt a single soul in my presence.
01:07:15What the fuck was that?
01:07:17I don't care what the fuck it was!
01:07:19I'm not letting her make a fool of me at my own wedding!
01:07:29Damnit!
01:07:30Damnit!
01:07:32You forgot I had a gun, too.
01:07:35That'll teach you from messing with the Wickhams.
01:07:37Take Miss Trixie and her family and get out of here.
01:07:39We're quartered.
01:07:40I'll sacrifice myself to fend them off.
01:07:42Devon, you and your brother are both good men.
01:07:45I will not let your injury be in vain.
01:07:48They will be punished.
01:07:52Now hold still for me.
01:07:56Right.
01:07:57Ray rides the world.
01:08:09Holy fuck!
01:08:10Did she just reverse the bullet?
01:08:11By chanting the Goddess Healer's chant?
01:08:13Is she the Goddess Healer?
01:08:19I'm all better now.
01:08:20Thank you, Miss Trixie.
01:08:22See, I knew that you were no ordinary woman.
01:08:25No.
01:08:26Please.
01:08:27I am just an ordinary girl.
01:08:29Don't put me on some sort of pedestal.
01:08:30Sure.
01:08:32You hear that?
01:08:33She's just some average homeless girl on the streets.
01:08:36She was probably holding out a super magnet that drew out the bullet.
01:08:39While I do not care for glory, I do believe in justice.
01:08:43Marissa and Butch, not only have you betrayed me, but now you've hurt the innocent, too.
01:08:48I will make you both pay for your crimes.
01:08:50And who are you to judge me for what I do?
01:08:53God?
01:08:54Wrong.
01:08:56But you're close.
01:08:58Bullshit!
01:08:59I'm gonna show you how the elite can travel on you little lives.
01:09:04You wanna cross the line so bad?
01:09:06Then let's see you try.
01:09:07Charge!
01:09:17The hell is this?
01:09:19This is the line between life and death.
01:09:23Yo, was that extra neon spray paint?
01:09:26I'll admit it looks pretty good, but I'll die before I believe that's magic.
01:09:31You're not the Grim Reaper.
01:09:33What if it's a trap?
01:09:34That woman has many tricks up her sleeves.
01:09:36We ain't afraid of her.
01:09:37She's nothing but a circus prostitute.
01:09:40Why don't you cross the line and see for yourself?
01:09:42I will.
01:09:46Left leaves the wrong breast.
01:09:55I'm fine.
01:09:57Nothing happened.
01:09:58You'll see soon enough.
01:10:00Oh, please.
01:10:01I really wanna die.
01:10:03And you call this the line between life and death?
01:10:05I knew you were just making that shit up.
01:10:07Whoops!
01:10:08Just frosted again.
01:10:10Whoops!
01:10:11And again.
01:10:12Nothing's happening.
01:10:24No!
01:10:25No!
01:10:25No!
01:10:26Hey!
01:10:28What did you do to my brother?
01:10:29I didn't do anything.
01:10:31Your brother just didn't want to heed my warning.
01:10:33I suggest you take him to the ER if you don't want your wedding to become his funeral.
01:10:39Come on.
01:10:40Major.
01:10:42Are you not gonna help your own brother?
01:10:43How was he able to cross the line?
01:10:45See, this must be an illusion.
01:10:50Only the pure of heart can cross the line.
01:10:53Will somebody take my brother to the hospital, please?
01:11:02You're so sore I wouldn't marry you.
01:11:04You'd go and hurt my brother.
01:11:05Oh, please.
01:11:06You hurt us first.
01:11:08At first, I was really hurt by your betrayal.
01:11:11But I've come to realize your true colors are that of a snake and a coward.
01:11:16Marissa, thanks for taking this low life from me.
01:11:20You blame yourself for being worthless.
01:11:23You think anyone would want to marry you when you've got nothing to offer?
01:11:28When you wear odd and crazy clothes all day?
01:11:34Don't touch my wife.
01:11:36Don't touch my wife.
01:11:38And instead, Trixie gets a handsome and protective husband.
01:11:43You can daydream all you want now, Trixie.
01:11:45But when the presidential contract arrives, it'll hit you like a fucking truck.
01:11:49That you're nothing but an ugly phony and I'm the queen of everything.
01:11:53Oh, really?
01:11:54Then let me show you how it is I who has everything you want.
01:11:57You've got nothing on me.
01:12:03Yes.
01:12:03Tell the president to get here immediately.
01:12:10Goddess.
01:12:11Madam President, I require your assistance.
01:12:14Yes.
01:12:15We'll be there immediately.
01:12:19Get the VP.
01:12:20We're leaving now.
01:12:24Did she just pretend to call the first woman president of the United States?
01:12:28God, I knew you were cheap, but I didn't know you were crazy, too.
01:12:31I'm so glad I dumped you for Marissa.
01:12:34You're pathetic, Trixie.
01:12:36A secretary to remind everyone how I have the presidential contract coming?
01:12:39Miss Wickham is correct.
01:12:41I was on the phone with the president earlier.
01:12:43Only the most important people have Madam President's direct line.
01:12:47You hear that, everyone?
01:12:48There is no way low-life Trixie could have called the president by herself.
01:12:54She's just a desperate phony who doesn't get enough male attention,
01:12:58so she's come here to play up her importance.
01:13:00No.
01:13:01My granddaughter would never do that.
01:13:03Reversing time just to heal someone's wound, only the goddess healer can do that.
01:13:08Is Trixie really the goddess healer?
01:13:18First, your boy toy actor pretends to be the war hero General Lysander Armstrong,
01:13:23and now you, Trixie, are pretending to be the goddess healer who gave me my presidential contract?
01:13:28Is this how the working class think all the time?
01:13:31I never realized how delusional they were.
01:13:34You can only dream of what you can never have while we rub our riches and privilege in their faces.
01:13:41Look, I don't know what circus school you went to, but you trying to make me jealous, Trixie?
01:13:45It ain't working. You can't just fake the...
01:13:50Yeah, but goddess healing power is legendary. It's like real magic.
01:13:55Trixie, you're an angel, but the goddess healing is beyond your imagination.
01:14:00And if we steal her identity just to punish her ex, won't her followers be furious and riot against you?
01:14:08No. Trixie, look. I believe you. You saved me. Whether you're a goddess or not, you did that.
01:14:17No matter what happens, you are a goddess to me.
01:14:21We'll riot against you now.
01:14:23Tear her apart!
01:14:24Tear her apart!
01:14:26Tear her apart!
01:14:28Tear her apart!
01:14:29Tear her apart!
01:14:31Tear her apart!
01:14:31The Vice President arrives!
01:14:48Who dare cause ruckus in here?
01:14:53Your General Lysander Armstrong.
01:14:56Wait, what?
01:14:58He's actually General Lysander Armstrong?
01:15:01No, no.
01:15:02We've been through this already once, okay?
01:15:04Right, Secretary Cho?
01:15:06This actor Trixie Hired pulled this weird stunt to try to bankrupt me.
01:15:11But you already confirmed with Madame President that I got the contract coming still, right?
01:15:16Yes, we all thought he was a fraud.
01:15:18What I mean is, you're the war hero, General Lysander Armstrong.
01:15:24And how dare you crash Miss Wickham's wedding?
01:15:27The moment you wake up, you fall under this vixen spell.
01:15:30And now you're attacking one of the most important allies to the President?
01:15:35He is the General.
01:15:37Oh, but he's in trouble now.
01:15:39Did you hear that?
01:15:41Even the Vice President knows me as an important ally to the nation's leader.
01:15:45So what if Trixie picked up some washed-up war hero?
01:15:48We got the VP and the President.
01:15:50On our side, you'll always be nothing, Trixie.
01:15:55I told you.
01:15:56Now punish them, Vice President Langley.
01:15:58This is treason.
01:15:59Lysander Armstrong, you are stripped from your military honors and titles.
01:16:08Hurry!
01:16:09The Goddess Healer needs us.
01:16:13You can't do that, Mr. Vice President.
01:16:15My brother is a war hero.
01:16:17He single-handedly saved this country from terrorist attack.
01:16:20He was in a coma for two years.
01:16:22If it wasn't for Miss Trixie, he would...
01:16:23Enough!
01:16:24You speak another word and I will bring down your entire family.
01:16:28Not just your brother.
01:16:30Yeah.
01:16:31It's okay.
01:16:33Mr. Vice President, I've already given my life once for my country.
01:16:36I have no problem doing that again if it means protecting my fiancé's life.
01:16:41And let's be honest about one other thing, Mr. Vice President.
01:16:43I never gave a fuck about any damn titles.
01:16:49I truly saved a good man.
01:16:56I will not let you bring ruin to my fiancé.
01:16:59And what can you do about it?
01:17:01Oh, Mr. Vice President, I have a swell idea.
01:17:04My biomedical company invented the latest line of poison darts for the military.
01:17:08Let's try it out on them.
01:17:12Hold on, Mr. Vice President.
01:17:13There's no way that you're taking this seriously.
01:17:15Put innocent civilian lives in danger?
01:17:18Despicable!
01:17:18What's more despicable is that you and your filthy companions are disrespecting power.
01:17:24Miss Wickham, you can use full force on them.
01:17:28Did you hear that, boys?
01:17:43Wait, that's the president.
01:17:57Hey, idiot!
01:17:59Oh, my God.
01:18:05Oh, my gosh.
01:18:07I'm so sorry, Madam President.
01:18:09That was...
01:18:10They were totally aiming for Trixie, the fraud in the middle.
01:18:14What is this?
01:18:15Oh, that's my new biomedical weapon, Madam, for your military.
01:18:19This is a war crime.
01:18:21These are innocent civilian lives you're messing with.
01:18:23You're the uncivilized buffoon.
01:18:25I can shoot whoever I want.
01:18:26I have the presidential contract.
01:18:28With great power comes great responsibility.
01:18:30And this is the kind of dastardly creation you've made with the contract I gave you?
01:18:35What are you doing?
01:18:35Reverse the poison and take it out of the president before it's too late.
01:18:39That is easy.
01:18:40There's no need.
01:18:42I'll save everyone.
01:18:57It's raining gold!
01:19:01What's happening?
01:19:02Trixie doesn't have that kind of money.
01:19:04It's got to be cheap glitter.
01:19:07She...
01:19:08She is...
01:19:10She is a criminal.
01:19:12Don't worry, Madam President.
01:19:13We will arrest her and we'll throw her in prison.
01:19:15I'd be quiet if I were you.
01:19:17Because you're the one that would be going to prison once everyone is healed up.
01:19:20What are you talking about?
01:19:22The president literally came here to give me my billion dollar contract.
01:19:34This contract?
01:19:36Yeah!
01:19:37Yes!
01:19:38Thank you, first gentleman.
01:19:57My contract, you bitch!
01:19:59And that's not all.
01:20:12This foul weapon will not see the light of day.
01:20:15There is only a need for a vaccine if there is a virus.
01:20:18Don't you realize?
01:20:19Or are you too much of a goody two-shoes to understand that?
01:20:23You're the real virus here, Marissa.
01:20:26Money is worth more to you than human lives.
01:20:28And that's something I cannot tolerate.
01:20:31So prepare yourself.
01:20:32Because I'm about to smite you.
01:20:35What are you going to do?
01:20:37The president is here and I just invented the best biomedical products in the world.
01:20:43You'll pardon me for that little mishap, right?
01:20:47Madam President, you've recovered now.
01:20:50So what's your final decision?
01:20:54I'll...
01:20:54She's going to give me my billion dollar...
01:21:02I'll smack her until she sees 50 stars.
01:21:09Why are you attacking me, Madam President?
01:21:11You're supposed to be giving me the billion dollar contract.
01:21:14You wish, you idiot!
01:21:18I've never seen a woman so vile, so ugly on the inside, it makes me want to vomit.
01:21:24I don't understand.
01:21:25I was just trying to punish these imposters for posing as the goddess of healing.
01:21:31And do you know the goddess healer saved me and my son during childbirth?
01:21:36You've really seen the goddess healer herself in the flesh?
01:21:40The one and only.
01:21:44And it's...
01:21:47Her.
01:21:58What?
01:22:03Welcome, goddess.
01:22:15You really are the goddess of healing, aren't you?
01:22:18How else did you think I saved you?
01:22:21Then why did you keep it a secret for so long?
01:22:25I wanted to walk the earth as a normal person.
01:22:28To help those in need.
01:22:30And make sure the man I chose loved me for me.
01:22:33No, so that means the billion dollar contract, it was you who gave it to me?
01:22:39Then she took her away just like that.
01:22:42That was her golden ticket.
01:22:44You were once my fiancé and best friend.
01:22:47But after everything you've done, we're officially getting ties with you both.
01:22:51No, please, I swear. I didn't know you were an actual saint.
01:22:57It doesn't matter who she is. Trixie has a heart of gold.
01:23:00She's an amazing person.
01:23:02And you ruined that the moment that you betrayed her.
01:23:06She's gonna be my wife.
01:23:07Because she is the most beautiful and amazing woman on this planet.
01:23:15I love you.
01:23:17I love you.
01:23:20That's what I love.
01:23:25I love you.
01:23:29I love you.
01:23:30I love you.
01:23:30Look what you're afraid of.
01:23:30All her goals.
01:23:32All her clothes.
01:23:33All that could have been mine.
01:23:35This is all your fault.
01:23:36This is all your fault.
01:23:37This is all your fault.
01:23:37You seduce me!
01:23:38Don't stop me! You were the one that came onto me, you himbo!
01:23:44Please, Tracy, give me another chance! I want to be rich again!
01:23:50I'll be your slave.
01:23:51Kiss the ground you walk on!
01:23:53You've had your chance to apologize, but it's too late now.
01:23:57All I see is your greed and how much you'd hurt others just to benefit yourself.
01:24:02You two should be locked up.
01:24:03And she shall.
01:24:05For creating illegal weapons of mass destruction, arrest Marissa and Butch Wickham.
01:24:11It's all your fault, Marissa. I never loved you.
01:24:14It's your fault!
01:24:15I was only with you for your money.
01:24:17I don't care.
01:24:18You were rich.
01:24:19I'll see myself now.
01:24:22Rest assured, goddess. We will not be using these biomedical weapons.
01:24:27My platform is spreading kindness, just like you.
01:24:31I knew you'd uphold our shared values.
01:24:33That is why I saved you.
01:24:35With these healing hands, I will work tirelessly to change the world one good deed at a time.
01:24:41Well, let's not let this wedding go to waste.
01:24:47Let's party!
01:24:48Wait, what if we just got married? Right now?
01:24:52Yes.
01:24:56Do you take each other to be your lawfully wedded partner?
01:25:01I do.
01:25:02I do.
01:25:03You may kiss the bride.
01:25:04I do.
01:25:06I do.
01:25:08I do.
01:25:09I do.
01:25:10I do.
01:25:11I do.
01:25:12I do.
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