- 9 hours ago
She's Not Homeless, She's Healer Goddess!
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Short filmTranscript
00:00:02Healer goddess, hear my plea.
00:00:06Please, save my child.
00:00:23Rod of a sepulis.
00:00:43Rejuvenate.
00:00:51Praise! She is the healer goddess!
00:00:55No, please. Don't call me that.
00:00:58What?
00:00:59I'm just glad I could help.
00:01:04Here you go, miss.
00:01:09Why be weighed down by a throne when I can live amongst the common people and help those the most
00:01:13in need?
00:01:26You must be rushing off to go find your jewels, because only a sackless coward would hit a puppy and
00:01:31run!
00:01:34Aw, it's okay, little guy. I'll fix you right up.
00:01:44Right rewrites the wrong.
00:01:49Rejuvenate.
00:01:53See? Good as the day you can kick him out of your mother's womb.
00:01:59Come on, Cleo! Let's go!
00:02:05Oh, my God!
00:02:08He's ready!
00:02:08Oh, my God!
00:02:09Oh, my God!
00:02:12Whoa!
00:02:13Hey, hey, hey!
00:02:15Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey, hey, hey, hey!
00:02:27His military family basically owns the entire global stock market.
00:02:32He's so hot.
00:02:34Does he come with the money?
00:02:35Yes. He'll even marry you if you can cure him.
00:02:38Money, fame, power, it's all yours.
00:02:46Are we still moving forward, Miss Trixie?
00:02:48Yes. Give the presidential contract to Marissa.
00:02:52Oh, I have another call coming in.
00:02:55Grandma!
00:02:56I'm dying! Save me, Trixie!
00:03:00Grandma?
00:03:02Grandma.
00:03:03When are you getting married? I'm already a hundred years old.
00:03:07I'm gonna keep you healthy forever, Grandma.
00:03:09And Butch is still on deployment, so that's why I haven't been married yet.
00:03:16Oh, but why marry a vegetable when I can bang a younger stud like you?
00:03:22We're talking about my brother's life. I don't have time for jokes.
00:03:27No!
00:03:36Please go feed your dog, Miss. Don't let it starve like you.
00:03:39Oh, kind stranger. Let me repay you by granting you a wish.
00:03:43Grant me a wish? That you can barely feed yourself?
00:03:46The downfall of humanity. It all starts with the loss of faith.
00:03:51What?
00:03:52Oh, jeez, this is giving me a migraine. Are you telling me to pray to God because we've been doing
00:03:58that?
00:03:58I'm telling you to have some faith in me.
00:04:01Okay, uh, I wish for you to cure my brother's illness. Can you do that?
00:04:07I can topple mountains and make a king out of a frog if I wanted to.
00:04:11Cleo, stay right here for a second.
00:04:13Don't go too far, Cleo.
00:04:18Hold still.
00:04:25What? My migraine's gone.
00:04:28Okay, then let's go. If you can cure my brother, he'll even marry you.
00:04:31Come on. Come on.
00:04:47How is he? What is the diagnosis? Remember, you will not marry him unless you cure him.
00:04:53I'm sorry. I don't know what this is.
00:04:55Aren't you the queen of medicine? You're supposed to be one of the best.
00:04:58Don't worry, General. I'm the angel herbalist and I have mastered all healing methods of the East.
00:05:05I can detect what condition your son has with just one needle.
00:05:26I have no clue what this is.
00:05:29Oh, it looks like the angel herbalist doesn't live up to her name after all.
00:05:35That's why we saved the best for last.
00:05:37Me, the witch doctor.
00:05:39I'll save your son, Lysander.
00:05:52He's not budging. There's no movement.
00:05:54Truly, I have saved thousands of patients all over the world, but I don't know what this is.
00:06:01Lord, I've scoured the earth for the best doctors. They've tried all these methods and they've all failed.
00:06:07If we can't save him, there's only one person who can.
00:06:12Who?
00:06:16The goddess of healing.
00:06:19Wait a second. You're not talking about the legendary goddess healing.
00:06:23That's correct. Her right rewrites the rond and her left leaves the bereft.
00:06:30That's her motto.
00:06:31It's what makes her a sage amongst mortals. We are nothing compared to her.
00:06:36She is eccentric and elusive. No one has ever seen her before.
00:06:41If this legendary healer is the only one that can truly save my son, I don't care if I go
00:06:47bankrupt.
00:06:48I will find her. James, come put out a bounty to the entire world.
00:06:54Whoever finds the goddess healer will give her five million dollars.
00:06:59There's no need.
00:07:13I'll save your son.
00:07:16Who the hell is she?
00:07:18Dad, she says she can cure Lysander.
00:07:20She's gonna save your brother? Don't be ridiculous.
00:07:23How can this shit-stained hobo cure your brother?
00:07:27Exactly. God, the unemployed are getting crazier and crazier.
00:07:31She's trying to scam her way into marrying the rich.
00:07:34Ew! She even brought a filthy dog with her.
00:07:38I bet it has fleas.
00:07:40That flea-infested dirty thing is your companion.
00:07:44Don't try to steal Lysander Armstrong from us.
00:07:50Don't touch him.
00:07:54They say don't judge a book by its cover, but I can see from all your faces that you've failed.
00:07:59So step aside. I'll take it from here.
00:08:02Could you hold this?
00:08:04Oh, you're not gonna touch my son.
00:08:07I'm the richest tycoon in this country and a former general.
00:08:11I know a gold-digging whore when I see one.
00:08:14I bet she's only here because giving blowjobs on the street corners wasn't paying enough cash.
00:08:20Who knows what an unskilled poor girl like her would do for some.
00:08:24A skinny-ass beggar trying to take advantage of Lysander Armstrong when he's unconscious?
00:08:30Ew!
00:08:32Disgusting.
00:08:33Go back to being a prostitute.
00:08:34Security!
00:08:35Get this STD-infested peasant out of here now. Let's go.
00:08:39If you throw me out, you're tossing away your son's last chance at life.
00:08:47Sir, we are at our wit's end trying to find a cure for Master Lysander into no avail.
00:08:52Maybe we should give her a try?
00:08:55You can always deal with her later if she turns out to be a fraud.
00:08:58Alright, I'll give you a shot.
00:09:00But I warn you, if you fail, I'll have your and your dog's head mounted on my wall.
00:09:07Is that any way to ask for help?
00:09:09You'd be blessed to have me.
00:09:12And I'm only here to repay your younger son's kindness.
00:09:15But since I'm not welcome here, I'll leave.
00:09:20Devon, come find me when you have a different wish.
00:09:22No, Miss Trixie, my brother is a hero to me. I can't lose him.
00:09:28Well, if he's a hero to you, then that means he must be a good person.
00:09:34My brother is a war hero who single-handedly saved this country from a terrorist attack.
00:09:38Also, he's great with puppies. He'd make a great husband.
00:09:44Who says I want to marry him?
00:09:45As if the number one hottest 30 under 30 would even dream of marrying a penniless bum like you.
00:09:52Only a lunatic would be crazy enough to marry her.
00:09:55I mean, look at her.
00:09:56Even if she cleaned herself up, you couldn't find an ounce of femininity on her.
00:10:02Only those cut from the lowest ranks were bigger over such trivial matters.
00:10:06Continue wasting your time.
00:10:07But I'm saving this patient.
00:10:19Oh, okay!
00:10:22What's happening?
00:10:24What are we doing?
00:10:27What are we doing?
00:10:35Oh!
00:10:35Oh!
00:10:36What the hell are you doing?
00:10:39I knew she was a perv!
00:10:41She's definitely trying to steal Lysander from us.
00:10:43Do you all not know that sweat can tell you everything that's medically wrong with a patient?
00:10:47Are you insane?
00:10:48Security, smash her face in for licking my son!
00:10:53He's born with congenital heart disease, has a peanut allergy,
00:10:56and the condition he has is called endogenic cryomorphy.
00:11:00Yeah, right!
00:11:01I mean, no way you got all that just from licking him!
00:11:04Oh, okay.
00:11:05I've studied every disease known to man, right?
00:11:07I even have the badge of universal medicine right here.
00:11:11And I've never heard of endo-cryo-what?
00:11:18This?
00:11:25It is worth nothing when I have the real thing right here.
00:11:28What?
00:11:29What?
00:11:30So you think that this crummy walking stick of yours is what?
00:11:34The rod of a sepulius?
00:11:35Why don't you go back to the homeless asylum where you came from if you're going to be this delusional?
00:11:41I agree.
00:11:42I mean, even if she does solve this medical mystery, what is the point as of doctors who have studied
00:11:48for years?
00:11:48We are all certified.
00:11:50But Lysander does have congenital heart disease.
00:11:54She's right about everything.
00:11:58Yeah, but if she just throws out a bunch of fake diagnoses, one of them is bound to be right.
00:12:03And again, there is no such thing as endo-cryo-what-what!
00:12:07Endogenic cryomorphy.
00:12:08Oh.
00:12:09And of course none of you have heard of it.
00:12:10Because I just discovered it.
00:12:13This condition only affects those with both CHD and a peanut allergy.
00:12:17The chances are a billion to one.
00:12:19A hundred times rarer than winning the lottery.
00:12:22But lucky for you all, you've hit the jackpot by finding me.
00:12:26What a bunch of baloney.
00:12:28I mean, you wouldn't be homeless if you were actually any good.
00:12:33Precisely.
00:12:34You are just a scamming prostitute.
00:12:36You don't compare to me, us, who actually studied real medicine.
00:12:41Listen, I bet you were too poor to go to real medical school.
00:12:45Oh, so she went to the super circus instead.
00:12:49And now she's here putting on this clown show coming up with fake diseases,
00:12:53which mean nothing if you can't wake him up.
00:12:56Is that supposed to be a challenge?
00:12:59Oh my God.
00:13:01If you three incompetent doormats want to show me up,
00:13:04I think you all should grow parts of your brain back.
00:13:07Which, by the way, that condition is called an encephaly.
00:13:11What is that supposed to mean?
00:13:13It means you're being schooled by me.
00:13:14And I'm about to walk all over your medical licensees.
00:13:19Then let's have a bet.
00:13:21If you can't heal him, we'll break your hands.
00:13:26And then you can't pretend to have healing hands anymore.
00:13:32These hands have saved more lives than all three of you combined.
00:13:37You're that desperate to get rid of your competition, huh?
00:13:40Miss Trixie, don't risk your hands for them.
00:13:43There's too many lives at stake.
00:13:47Don't worry. I got this.
00:13:51It's a deal.
00:13:54I'll save Lysander Armstrong.
00:13:56No one is dying on my watch.
00:14:04Lysander Armstrong has been in a vegetative state for two years.
00:14:11Are you stopping me because you're scared I'd actually succeed?
00:14:15Homeless or not, if you save my son, I'll give you everything.
00:14:27I'll even have Lysander, my heir, marry you.
00:14:30I'm not doing this for the money or for a wealthy husband.
00:14:33I just believe in helping good people and doing the right thing.
00:14:38Prepare a Jacuzzi set at exactly 113 degrees Fahrenheit.
00:14:41Wait, wait, wait, wait. What for?
00:14:43Don't listen to her.
00:14:45She probably stinks so bad that she just wants a bath to wash the homeless stench off of her.
00:14:50Firstly, this is called greatness.
00:14:53Secondly, even if you drown yourself in plastic surgery,
00:14:57you couldn't get rid of your own ugly moral character.
00:15:01What? Did you just call me?
00:15:05There's a man's life at stake here, and you're standing in my way.
00:15:10Don't don the mantle of doctor when you're only capable of harm.
00:15:14Now stop getting in my way, or I promise you,
00:15:17you will be bubbling at the mouth very soon.
00:15:20Oh, yeah?
00:15:21Hey, you wanna see real pain?
00:15:22Where's the dog?
00:15:23Well, put down the dog!
00:15:25With pleasure.
00:15:35Oh!
00:15:41Left leaves the wrong bereft.
00:15:48You don't deserve to call yourself a doctor.
00:15:53She's been poisoned!
00:15:56It was her!
00:15:57Do you see any poison on me?
00:16:00Medicine in the right hands can save lives, but in the wrong hands, it becomes nothing but poison.
00:16:06This bitch isn't good enough to take down the queen of medicine!
00:16:09Do you have one of your antidotes on you?
00:16:11Of course.
00:16:12I've saved entire civilizations with my antidotes.
00:16:16If I wanna save someone, even the grim reaper can't stop me.
00:16:35Why is she spitting blood?
00:16:37This wasn't supposed to happen!
00:16:38I thought you said even the grim reaper can't get in your way, angel herbalist.
00:16:43This is what I call...
00:16:45Malpractice.
00:16:47This isn't fatal. She'll live.
00:16:49But she deserves a little punishment.
00:16:51Well, where's the jacuzzi I asked for?
00:16:54Jacuzzi is ready?
00:16:55Right this way.
00:16:56Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait!
00:16:58What the hell is going on?
00:16:59You say you want your son to live on to give you tons of grandchildren, don't you?
00:17:03Then stop getting in my way. Every second counts.
00:17:08Let's go for a dip, shall we?
00:17:13General Armstrong, your family is the richest and most powerful in the nation.
00:17:19Are you really gonna let this hobo slut touch your son?
00:17:23Hold on. You two are going in there... alone?
00:17:27If you don't want these drooling vultures to see your son naked, then sure, invite everyone in.
00:17:32Alright, but I warn you, no funny business.
00:18:03hate me.
00:18:23Set this up.
00:18:24This is a movie.
00:18:32This is a movie.
00:18:32Have you seen the movie?
00:18:38you really shouldn't leave your precious son in there with that homeless con woman general
00:18:43armstrong exactly what if she gets pregnant by him she could blackmail you for millions
00:18:50that's what i would do if i was that poor and then the armstrong family will be the laughing
00:18:55stock of the nation held for ransom by a homeless woman dad you can't seriously be listening to
00:19:02that we have to have faith where did you actually find this low light uh on the streets are you
00:19:11shitting me you found this bum on the streets are you nuts you don't know her you don't know her
00:19:17background she could be a psychotic murder that is it general you have to go in and stop this now
00:19:22you're right that's it i'm shutting down this clown show right now james let's go yes sir
00:19:38i told you all to stay out
00:19:45this is a critical moment for you we can't be interrupted otherwise we both die
00:19:54i'm not gonna let this homeless hoochie mama trap my son
00:20:00i'm gonna save him myself
00:20:06you see that general this isn't just a gull-dicking con woman this is a witchcraft
00:20:13i know what this is this is the dark witch i've heard of her she uses her dark magic to
00:20:20steal the
00:20:21hearts of young handsome men and she eats them alive oh i'm gonna kill that bitch before she takes
00:20:26my son james get the swat team yes sir
00:20:34you regain consciousness
00:20:45help me i just want
00:20:52something's wrong
00:20:56you were drunk with an aphrodisiac
00:20:59lysander armstrong and his fortune will soon be mine
00:21:04that's one more thing i'm saving you from
00:21:13sir
00:21:14the swat team is here captain morales
00:21:19my son is trapped behind there with a devious man-eating witch i need you to do whatever you
00:21:25can to tear down that door rest assured general armstrong we'll break down that door and bury that
00:21:31bitch alive
00:21:46who the fuck are you and why the hell are we naked
00:21:51good you're awake
00:21:52i'm saving you
00:21:54saving me
00:21:55by bathing with me
00:21:58who are you your fucking spy
00:22:00talk
00:22:01i swear to god i'll have you arrested for this
00:22:05you're the one who's trying to kiss me in your stipper
00:22:10i will never
00:22:11i will never
00:22:25look who's scouting now
00:22:29look i don't know what the fuck this is all right but it is a biological fact
00:22:33a man is attracted to a naked woman
00:22:37and her breasts
00:22:38science okay it just means that my body
00:22:41oh shut up
00:22:41excuse me
00:22:45you're distracted me with your phone
00:22:47and i'm a professional
00:22:49i hear lysander's voice
00:22:50captain do something now
00:22:52ready
00:22:58we're almost there
00:22:59aim
00:23:02get him boys
00:23:04get him
00:23:06fire
00:23:10fire
00:23:39those
00:23:40young master armstrong you are too easily fooled this homeless psycho doesn't even have
00:23:47the skills to make a living how is she going to save someone else's life that's right
00:23:51the queen angel and i are already the top female doctors in the world if we can't save him no
00:23:57one can
00:23:58except for the goddess healer think about it we heard lysander's voice he's been in a coma for two years
00:24:04miss
00:24:05you're right this homeless girl is maybe this homeless girl is maybe the goddess
00:24:12maybe this homeless girl is really the god no no absolutely not there is no way this hobo girl is
00:24:20better than us
00:24:20but how could you know for sure right now what we need to do is not interrupt miss tricksy
00:24:26you're wrong sir
00:24:27this homeless snake is using the forbidden techniques on master lysander it's called borderline revival
00:24:33she uses torturous pain to wake the patient but only temporarily
00:24:38it's a trick to pull the wool over your eyes and ears
00:24:43that means my son is in tremendous pain
00:24:46i'm gonna ask you two to do whatever you can
00:24:48to kill that antler rod bearing witch
00:24:52my son doesn't deserve this
00:24:53he is dying right now naked in a jacuzzi with a smelly vagrant
00:24:58then it looks like it's up to me
00:25:00the witch doctor
00:25:02only i know the right techniques to take her down
00:25:06my son's life is in your hands
00:25:08you heal him i will give you whatever your heart desires
00:25:13i don't know who you are but there is no way i am letting you rip my golden bachelor away
00:25:19from me
00:25:21this isn't the finishing touch
00:25:24i must now give you the kiss of life
00:25:27so we can both survive
00:25:47it's poison gas
00:25:49poison gas will smoke them out and end her torture over master lysander
00:25:54poison gas my son is in there
00:25:57you're jeopardizing his life as well
00:25:59no don't worry general
00:26:01gold diggers like her only care about themselves
00:26:04soon she'll come out crying to mommy
00:26:07then we can reverse the poison on your son
00:26:10and then he can marry one of us
00:26:12they really won't stop until they get both of us killed
00:26:18i made a promise to you that i'd save you
00:26:21it's now or never
00:26:34what the hell are they doing in there
00:26:37it's been over 10 minutes
00:26:38wait a second
00:26:40you don't think that they're
00:26:42you
00:26:42you suffocated my brother and miss trixie in there
00:26:45don't point your fingers at me
00:26:47if your brother's dead
00:26:48it's because of that homeless gold digger
00:26:50oh my god yeah she's the one who sealed the door shut
00:26:54i mean she probably locked themselves in there on accident
00:26:57miss trixie wouldn't have to do that
00:26:59if you weren't trying to sabotage her from saving my brother
00:27:02this is taking way too long
00:27:05captain morales
00:27:06it's time to get out
00:27:07the big guns
00:27:08these bazookas can flatten even a bomb shelter
00:27:12bazooka
00:27:13she won't be able to hide even if she's the devil himself
00:27:16crap oh my god
00:27:17get back son
00:27:19ready
00:27:20aim
00:27:22oh shit
00:27:23oh shit
00:27:26quit your whining and stand down
00:27:41the parasite's been extracted
00:27:43shoot her dead now
00:27:44do i need to fix your hearing too
00:27:46i said stand down
00:27:50don't listen to her
00:27:51she's a fraud
00:27:52a termite to the field of medicine
00:27:54i just saved this man that otherwise would have died in your care
00:27:58if i'm a termite then
00:28:00you're worse than a disease spreading tick
00:28:02wait a second
00:28:04are you saying you cured my son
00:28:06he'll wake in just a moment
00:28:07you can see for yourself
00:28:09well now you're just asking to be exposed
00:28:12that is it
00:28:13no more stalling general
00:28:15if you won't punish her
00:28:16i will
00:28:21don't hurt her
00:28:26he's a cure
00:28:33his pulse is regular
00:28:35in fact it's never been better
00:28:40there's no sign of illness infection or disease
00:28:51miss trixie did it dad
00:28:53lysander's warm again
00:28:54he's not cold and pale like before
00:28:56and his heart is strong
00:28:58come feel it
00:29:01i saved my son
00:29:02thank you
00:29:03next time don't go seeking medical advice from those with ill will
00:29:07your son would have otherwise died
00:29:09by their greedy and unskilled hands
00:29:11i've learned my lesson
00:29:13i will not let these two nutjobs ever practice their voodoo voodoo magic again
00:29:18wait wait no no
00:29:19there is only one person in the world
00:29:22who is more skilled in the field of medicine than the queen angel and i
00:29:28the goddess healer
00:29:33could you really be the goddess of healing
00:29:36but rumor has it that the goddess of healing is well over 100 years old
00:29:40and you don't look a day after 20
00:29:43it doesn't matter who i am
00:29:45what matters is that the patient is healthy again
00:29:48devon i've repaid your kindness by fulfilling your wish of saving your brother
00:29:51take care
00:29:52no wait
00:29:54miss trixie we still haven't fulfilled our promise to you yet
00:29:57he's right
00:29:58we are men of our words
00:30:00and as i promised you my heir lysander would take you as a wife if you cured him
00:30:04and you did just that
00:30:05of course
00:30:06you're welcome to marry me instead
00:30:08i really appreciate it but
00:30:11i'm sorry i
00:30:15i'm already engaged
00:30:18already engaged?
00:30:20i am
00:30:20i've been patiently awaiting his return from deployment for the last three years
00:30:24and he's coming back today
00:30:26but don't be disappointed
00:30:29really i'm no one special
00:30:30i just got lucky with your brother
00:30:33some guru taught me that spa water can cure all kinds of ailments
00:30:36but you're still lysander's savior
00:30:38please let me give you what i promised
00:30:40take the gold
00:30:41no really
00:30:44i don't need anything
00:30:45i just believe in doing good in the world
00:30:51tricksy
00:30:51it's your fiance
00:30:53he's back
00:30:54and he says he's breaking up with you
00:30:58i must go
00:31:05hobo close
00:31:07halo glow
00:31:08i bet the goddess healer is just like miss tricksy
00:31:11it was just dumb luck
00:31:14she's even dumber for not accepting his marriage proposal
00:31:16she could have been the richest woman in the world
00:31:19marrying the hottest
00:31:20most powerful bachelor
00:31:22around
00:31:25i'm gonna marry that homeless woman
00:31:31oh my god
00:31:33i mean i don't know about that homeless bimbo but this is godly
00:31:49you two nut jobs are a disgrace to your profession
00:31:53take these two weirdos out of here
00:31:55and revoke their licenses
00:31:56wait no we're not brides
00:31:59no she's just better than us
00:32:02oh my god
00:32:05we were truly blessed to have miss tricksy here huh
00:32:09she's no average jane
00:32:10no she isn't
00:32:11she said it was just dumb luck
00:32:13but if she truly had these special skills
00:32:16why did she wear that shit-stained dress and had an impeccable looking doll
00:32:19but think about the impenetrable walls
00:32:21no normal person could have done that
00:32:23goddess or not
00:32:25homeless or not i don't care
00:32:26i have never met a woman like that
00:32:28i have to find her
00:32:29i have to make her my life
00:32:31she won my heart over too
00:32:32but if my bestest big bro wants her
00:32:35i'll help you find her
00:32:36alright listen
00:32:38i need help finding three wedding gifts
00:32:45i'm dumping tricksy
00:32:46so i want you
00:32:47your granddaughters
00:32:49filthy things
00:32:50out of my house
00:32:52now
00:32:53tricksy paid for this house
00:32:54she waited for you
00:32:56for three years
00:32:58she was dumb enough to put my name on the lease
00:33:00and i'm upgrading for a better girlfriend now
00:33:02one with some serious
00:33:03fuck you money
00:33:05so get lost
00:33:06who gave you permission to bark like a rabbit
00:33:09hyena in my house
00:33:16grandma
00:33:18beatrice
00:33:18trixie
00:33:19amori
00:33:21i've been dying to throw this in your face
00:33:22i'm dumping you
00:33:24for your best friend
00:33:25marissa
00:33:27in fact
00:33:28the wedding's tomorrow
00:33:30so sign over the house
00:33:31now
00:33:37you gave me this ring
00:33:38and asked me to wait
00:33:40and i did
00:33:41for three years while you were deployed
00:33:43yet you cheat on me with my best friend
00:33:46and now you're trying to swindle my home
00:33:50do you have no shame
00:33:51we were together for three years
00:33:53and uh
00:33:53it was a complete waste of my life
00:33:55when i could have been with a loaded girl like marissa
00:34:03that's how much she would owe me if i was in the rent-to-boyfriend business
00:34:09i see you're fulfilling your highest aspirations of being a low-grade male prostitute
00:34:17oh yeah
00:34:18well marissa
00:34:21is so much better than you
00:34:22she grew up even poorer than you
00:34:26and now she's the ceo of an entire corporation
00:34:33and you
00:34:35you're still nothing
00:34:37so you think she's an upgrade
00:34:39of course she's an upgrade
00:34:41look what she uh got me for my engagement
00:34:45oops
00:34:46yeah
00:34:47that's maybe worth one millionth the presidential contract i gave her
00:34:57you gave her the presidential contract
00:34:59i certainly did
00:35:00in fact
00:35:02marissa
00:35:03you and your dimwit brother
00:35:05only have everything you have all thanks to me
00:35:12oh i think she's losing it bro
00:35:14that breakup must have hit her hard
00:35:17you two
00:35:18are the ungrateful cheating scum here
00:35:21my granddaughter
00:35:22supported you
00:35:24and your entire family for three years while you were gone
00:35:27how dare you insult her
00:35:31it's okay grandma
00:35:32let's not stoop to that level
00:35:35poor edna
00:35:36she still doesn't know what you're doing out there on the streets huh
00:35:39what is he talking about jersey
00:35:40show her bob
00:35:47this is how embarrassingly useless your granddaughter is
00:35:50she didn't purchase this house on her own
00:35:52she was begging on the street for money
00:35:56i can't be caught with a piss poor nobody like you
00:35:59even if you got no game
00:36:01i got street cred i got out of keep you dig
00:36:03the word you're looking for is dignity
00:36:06and you're one to speak
00:36:08cheater
00:36:10is this true tricksy
00:36:15i've been broadening my horizons grandma
00:36:17i want to see how regular everyday people live
00:36:20so that i can help them
00:36:22of course those without substance underneath would never understand that
00:36:27what is that supposed to mean
00:36:28it means the new girlfriend you think is an upgrade
00:36:32is actually a downgrade
00:36:37enough bullshitting already
00:36:38just sign the damn papers and we can each get on with our lives
00:36:54at your wedding i will
00:36:55what
00:36:57if you won't do good by me of breaking things off before two-timing me with my best friend
00:37:02why should i do good by you
00:37:04i'll give you my john hancock at your wedding as a charity to you
00:37:10fucking bitch
00:37:11you better keep your word
00:37:13oh that's rich
00:37:15after tomorrow you will never feel so rich ever again
00:37:17do you remember that
00:37:25tricksy
00:37:27marissa's a millionaire now
00:37:28they'll destroy you if you show even so much as a hair at their wedding
00:37:33grandma
00:37:33i have to confess something to you
00:37:36i've secretly amassed a fortune worth trillions
00:37:39trillions
00:37:42that would make you the richest person on the planet
00:37:47it's because of the healing hands i inherited from aseplius
00:37:50the god of healing
00:37:52i've saved several world leaders with these hands
00:37:55that's how i was able to give marissa the presidential contract
00:37:59and become the goddess healer
00:38:01it makes me angrier hearing her name knowing how she betrayed you
00:38:05but please tricksy dear i know it was broken your heart but embellishing your worth and who you are
00:38:14it will only delay the healing process you don't have to believe me just yet
00:38:20after we lost mom and dad because we didn't have the money for their medical bills
00:38:24i vowed that i would do everything i can to serve those in need
00:38:29that's why i'm taking everything back from butch and i'm giving it back to charity
00:38:32you've always had an angel's heart
00:38:35i'm certain you will meet someone who will treat you right
00:38:39who actually deserves you
00:38:41you will see tomorrow grandma
00:38:45oh yeah
00:38:51you said tricksy's crashing at my wedding
00:38:53she was bullying us too salsa
00:38:55she's probably trying to extort you now that she knows you're rich as fuck
00:39:00i hope when nobody steps on snake
00:39:02snake bites back hard
00:39:04so let her come and embarrass herself
00:39:06yeah
00:39:07you mean
00:39:10we broadcast
00:39:12that video of me
00:39:16yes
00:39:16her cavewoman's take the 19th century tin can
00:39:20she'll prop me up higher on my pedestal
00:39:22and the whole world sees her in her homeless mess
00:39:24against my presidential glow up
00:39:26let's turn this party into her funeral
00:39:35there he is
00:39:38welcome home brother
00:39:40welcome home general
00:39:44sir
00:39:44the homeless woman who saved you miss trixie
00:39:47this is the file of her ex butch tanner
00:39:49he served with your regiment in the marines
00:39:51you mean the butch tanner that can barely carry supplies
00:39:54well she's been providing for him and his entire family while he's been deployed overseas sir
00:39:58so she waited for him for years and then he betrayed her
00:40:01fucking coward
00:40:02according to intel she's planning to bring it down on them at their wedding
00:40:05then we should join her
00:40:07men
00:40:08i'm only alive today because of that virtuous woman
00:40:11and her incredible power that saved my life
00:40:13so she needs our support
00:40:14will you join me in protecting her
00:40:16yes sir
00:40:17we will allow our lives to protect her
00:40:20and let's roll
00:40:36welcome everyone to my wedding
00:40:38today is a very special day for me and butch
00:40:41not only are we getting married
00:40:42but in just one hour my company will be receiving the presidential contract
00:40:46allowing my biomedical company to go public
00:40:52congratulations on the contract once again mrs.
00:40:55wake him
00:40:56stowe butch is taking my last name
00:40:58oh and please don't be so uptight secretary cho
00:41:01you are the secretary of the entire u.s health department but this is a partay after all
00:41:07i see some of the most important people in the nation have also arrived to celebrate you
00:41:13the u.s president will also be arriving soon to give you the contract herself
00:41:19it's an honor
00:41:20and that's why sasa is the best wife a man could ever dream of
00:41:25we will make sure the crowd is entertained tonight let the wedding begin
00:41:32not so fast the party doesn't start until i say it does
00:41:58you two really are a match made in hell
00:42:00so i've come to save your guests from this oncoming train wreck
00:42:04i don't recognize it from any of our elite circles
00:42:07who is she
00:42:07uh this is our uh entertainment for tonight sir
00:42:11just watch
00:42:14shh
00:42:15trixie what are you doing here
00:42:16this isn't the homeless shelter you lost
00:42:18i bet she's here to bum a meal off us
00:42:20you know being this poor
00:42:24me bum a meal
00:42:25have you forgotten that it was i who bankrolled you two for the last three years
00:42:29and what evidence do you have of that
00:42:31look at me then go look at yourself in the mirror
00:42:34i'm a millionaire ceo
00:42:36even the first woman president will be here any second now to congratulate me
00:42:40and you're nothing but a washed up sewer rat
00:42:44sasa
00:42:44she's like so obsessed with me she will
00:42:48see everyone
00:42:49but already cut ties with his ex
00:42:51but she's so shameless and desperate that she'd still show up to my wedding to suck up to me
00:42:57this is what poor sad girls do
00:43:00they beg for scraps from us the rich and glorious
00:43:04projecting much marissa you might feel all high and mighty now but don't bite the hand that feeds you
00:43:11especially when i'm the one who's giving you the contract
00:43:18you
00:43:19giving me the contract
00:43:21you have no skills
00:43:22no education
00:43:24no connection
00:43:25so how could you possibly have a pool
00:43:27to get the u.s. fucking president
00:43:29to give me a billion dollar contract
00:43:32we both share humble beginnings marissa
00:43:34and i saw potential in you
00:43:35even trusted you as my best friend
00:43:37but i recognize now that greed has poisoned you
00:43:41don't be all sore now just cause i stole your man
00:43:44this is what us rich girls do
00:43:47they steal from lame spinsters for fun
00:43:50damn right
00:43:51you were too embarrassing for me
00:43:54sasa tramples you any day
00:43:56i can say that now that i'm marrying the rich
00:44:00bravo
00:44:01self-admission of a gold digger
00:44:02quick
00:44:03somebody put that on a memoir
00:44:04sasa she's embarrassing me in front of everyone
00:44:07drinkers up
00:44:07don't listen to her everyone
00:44:09she's the gold digging blood sucking leech
00:44:12i don't even have to lift a finger and you're already embarrassing yourself in front of everyone for me butch
00:44:18you may look and sound like a man
00:44:20but you're nothing but a pathetic coward
00:44:23okay enough
00:44:23you know what i always couldn't stand about you
00:44:26your moral posturing
00:44:28but guess what
00:44:29morals are just lies to make you lame girls feel better about yourselves
00:44:33that's why no man will choose you over marissa tricksy
00:44:37because i've got the material goods
00:44:38and you're just all empty talk
00:44:40i'm not here to request to be chosen
00:44:43because i'm the one who's doing the choosing
00:44:47see this
00:44:59oh my god
00:45:01is that the billion dollar contract for sasa?
00:45:06the one that's supposed to make us all rich as fuck?
00:45:08no
00:45:09absolutely not
00:45:10i i don't believe it
00:45:12you all sound so scared already
00:45:13don't worry
00:45:14this isn't that contract
00:45:17it's the lease to the modest home you try to swindle from me
00:45:23see everyone
00:45:24she's just trying to bluff us
00:45:26but you don't even have the guts to go all the way
00:45:28look at her following orders
00:45:29i asked her to sign over the lease and here she is
00:45:32like a good little uh
00:45:34peasant slave
00:45:34that house is worth all her life savings
00:45:40you want to uh
00:45:41i don't know beg for a little treat while you're at it
00:45:54you must understand me
00:45:56i'm here to take back everything i've ever given you
00:45:59i'm giving it to charity
00:46:07bro
00:46:08she's gone cuckoo in the head
00:46:10she thinks that just because she rented a pretty little dress
00:46:12she can pretend to be a deep pocket investment baddie
00:46:15you wish you had that kind of money to just toss away tricksy
00:46:18it's just a drop in the bucket for me
00:46:20i i know what this is
00:46:22you've gone delusional
00:46:24and you think you're cinderella
00:46:25so you can just show up to a fancy party and some prince charming will scoop you into money forever
00:46:30well that's not happening
00:46:32security
00:46:32lock the doors
00:46:34this woman doesn't leave until we're through with her
00:46:39this is where your dreams will die bitch
00:46:45we found miss trixie lysander
00:46:46she's being cornered by her ex and his mistress at the wickham wedding right now
00:46:49butch tanner
00:46:51well he's gonna wish he died in battle after i'm done with him
00:46:54let's go
00:46:58you think a few toy guns scare me marissa
00:47:01i've saved plenty of people for much worse
00:47:05including your head of command butch
00:47:07general lysander armstrong
00:47:09you mean the legendary war hero
00:47:12he's been in a coma for years after he saved the nation from a terrorist attack
00:47:16you're an unskilled
00:47:18unemployed
00:47:18ugly leech
00:47:20so how could you possibly have this magical ability
00:47:22to heal someone like general lysander armstrong
00:47:26no one here's gonna believe you
00:47:27if you really cured the incurable general
00:47:29then sasa is the fucking virgin mary
00:47:32and she's not
00:47:33you're just asking to be humiliated trixie
00:47:36you show them butch
00:47:43see for yourselves everyone
00:47:45trixie's just a
00:47:46freeloading beggar
00:47:51she won't leave me and marissa alone cause we're rich as fuck now
00:47:55i'm a major in the marines
00:47:57sasa
00:47:58she has
00:47:59a billion dollar biomedical contract
00:48:01with the military
00:48:03approved by the first female president of the united states herself bitch
00:48:08how despicable
00:48:09she's just trying to leech off you like a parasitic gold digger
00:48:13get out of here no one wants to marry you
00:48:15no free meals for the poor
00:48:17do you see this trixie
00:48:19this is high society
00:48:21so you're either born on a silver spoon
00:48:23or you're as accomplished as me to be here
00:48:25maybe if you do some serious dick sucking here
00:48:29maybe someone will drop a couple bucks in your tin can
00:48:35i already have everything one can dream of
00:48:37but i valued our friendship marissa
00:48:39which is why i came here to give you a second chance
00:48:41to see if you'd apologize and admit to your backstabbing
00:48:45but no
00:48:46you stooped so low
00:48:48it disgusts me
00:48:49nothing is more disgusting than you standing on street corners
00:48:53like a bum
00:48:54and who knows
00:48:55if you've already started offering sexual services
00:48:59well then
00:49:01why don't you get on your knees for me trixie
00:49:03my brother
00:49:04will never take you back
00:49:06no man will marry an embarrassed man like you
00:49:09but make me happy
00:49:11and i might consider making you my personal prostitute
00:49:25how dare you hit my brother
00:49:27i'm never letting you leave here alive
00:49:30boss
00:49:31do something
00:49:32don't worry my dear
00:49:33after i'm done with you trixie
00:49:35not even the goddess of healing will be able to save you
00:49:39oh
00:49:40is that so
00:49:42security
00:49:44get down on your knees
00:49:46and give bob one hell of a blowjob
00:49:48in front of everybody here
00:49:50or i'll pop so many holes in you
00:49:52the men here won't know which one to fuck
00:49:54i don't need to be the goddess of anything to punish you
00:49:57any of the powerful leaders i've saved before could crush you
00:50:00before you even touch me
00:50:02dream on
00:50:04you wish general lysander scooped you off your feet
00:50:07but you weren't good enough for me
00:50:08you're definitely not good enough for him
00:50:10enough
00:50:11you're souring my party
00:50:13so you either get the fuck out
00:50:15or i'm gonna shoot you
00:50:18on the count of three
00:50:19i think i quite like it here
00:50:21two
00:50:32mmmm
00:50:33this wine is so delicious
00:50:36one
00:50:37shoot
00:50:39nobody
00:50:40nobody
00:50:41is laying a hand
00:50:42on my future wife
00:50:49it's
00:50:50it's
00:50:51it's
00:50:51it's
00:50:52it's
00:50:52it's
00:50:54it's
00:50:56it's
00:50:57it's
00:50:57it's
00:50:58it's
00:50:58it's
00:51:01it's
00:51:07it's
00:51:08did they hurt you
00:51:09no
00:51:09i'm fine
00:51:11but um
00:51:12when did i become your future wife
00:51:15you saved me
00:51:17trixie
00:51:17remember
00:51:18i'm a man of my word
00:51:20they're never gonna hurt you ever again
00:51:22really
00:51:23it was nothing
00:51:24i saved you because you're a good man
00:51:26not because i want you to owe me any favors
00:51:35i see what this is
00:51:36you're the one who cheated on me trixie
00:51:38look at you guys all lovey-dove
00:51:40don't try to pin this on her
00:51:41she waited for you for three years
00:51:43this is the kind of woman of virtue that a man would die for
00:51:48virtue
00:51:50don't make me laugh
00:51:52she's probably out there giving blowjobs for cash
00:51:54no man who in a hundred foot pole would want to touch her
00:51:58she should be happy bob was willing to give her some
00:52:01i see her in the marines
00:52:08i'm a major
00:52:09you know
00:52:10look man
00:52:11i know trixie is like a
00:52:13i don't know
00:52:13like a seven
00:52:14now that she's all cleaned up
00:52:16but don't waste your manhood on a whiny
00:52:18worthless woman like that
00:52:25a real man
00:52:27never talks about a woman that way
00:52:29you're a coward
00:52:40we don't need to fight fire with fire to deal with the likes of them
00:52:44you're very gracious trixie you know that
00:52:49you're only getting off with it because she's so kind
00:52:51so you're gonna do me the favor of never coming near her again
00:52:53you understand
00:52:54you wanna fuck with me you little dipshit
00:52:56i'm a fucking major
00:52:58you're probably lowest rank of the military grunts
00:53:00i'll
00:53:01i'll destroy you
00:53:02do you really not know who this is butch
00:53:05i thought you were in the marines
00:53:07what have you been doing this whole time if you don't know who this war hero is
00:53:11he was just a supply boy
00:53:15war hero
00:53:17is this all part of your plan trixie
00:53:19poor girl
00:53:20did you sell your house to hire this actor so you can feel better about yourself
00:53:25a woman's worth is tied to the man she marries
00:53:27trixie is worthless cause that guy looks like a cowboy
00:53:34a bum girl and a pimp
00:53:36what a pair
00:53:38seems like they don't know who you are since you've been out of action for so long
00:53:42maybe we should try to pay some off some more don't you think
00:53:46bring in the wedding gifts
00:53:55what is all this
00:53:56trixie listen i know that you didn't ask for anything after you saved my life
00:54:01but i know that we shared a moment
00:54:06i'm not the kind of man to get close to a woman and then just disappear
00:54:10it's not in my nature
00:54:12i'm like somebody else here
00:54:14listen trixie
00:54:16i have never
00:54:18met a woman
00:54:20like you
00:54:21so incredible and kind and beautiful
00:54:24so i know
00:54:26that you're the one for me
00:54:29this guy's either nuts or a really
00:54:32really good actor
00:54:34Oscar worthy
00:54:36no
00:54:37first gift
00:54:43trixie i know that you just lost your home
00:54:46so i'm gifting you with your own
00:54:48new mansion
00:54:49worth 500 million dollars previously owned by
00:54:52jennifer aniston
00:54:55second gift
00:54:59this contains all the rights to
00:55:01my entire fortune
00:55:03which is now yours
00:55:04entire fortune from a cowboy actor
00:55:07must be that easy
00:55:08they already spent their entire life savings on this clown show
00:55:11they've got nothing left
00:55:12why sander
00:55:14i really don't care for any of us
00:55:15look i i know
00:55:17i know that you are the farthest thing from a material woman
00:55:20okay which is exactly why
00:55:22well my third gift
00:55:24is um
00:55:26well
00:55:26i know
00:55:26i know
00:55:41i know
00:55:41i know
00:55:41clio
00:55:42hey
00:55:44oh my god
00:55:46you found my dog
00:55:51trixia i'm just a man
00:55:53but with you it's so much more
00:55:55trixia amore
00:56:00will you marry me
00:56:03you know i can't say no to this doggo
00:56:09yes i will marry you
00:56:27go go power couple
00:56:30woo
00:56:31okay stop
00:56:33the only power couple here is butch and i
00:56:37let's remind everyone how worthless trixia is
00:56:41no man in their right mind
00:56:44would marry that embarrassing sack of scraps
00:56:46hey
00:56:47i don't care if she's homeless or not
00:56:48but i'm making this woman my wife
00:56:50which means that she will be treated as and cherished as
00:56:54the most precious woman on earth
00:56:56understand
00:57:01you still don't realize
00:57:02that my brother is the most powerful man on earth
00:57:05this is general
00:57:07lysander armstrong
00:57:15as if
00:57:16like the almighty general lysander armstrong would propose to a homeless prostitute like trixie
00:57:22yes the armstrong family basically control the global stock market
00:57:26lysander armstrong would sooner marry the princess of england than someone from the lowest rank of society
00:57:31i bet my life you're all just
00:57:34actors
00:57:34then you better enjoy your last breath
00:57:36come on lysander what are we waiting for
00:57:38let's show them what we can do and get revenge for trixie
00:57:40what can a bunch of piss poor people do to us
00:57:42the elites
00:57:44infect us with your poor people bad luck
00:57:46she wishes she could blame her low status on bad luck
00:57:49truth is she's just a useless
00:57:52lazy bitchin bum
00:57:54she's utterly unmarriable
00:57:55unmarriable
00:57:58i can dispose of them
00:58:00in other means if you don't prefer violence
00:58:02i'd handle them myself but
00:58:06i'll let you do all the heavy lifting
00:58:09go ahead lysander
00:58:17yes hello this is lysander please
00:58:19bankrupt marissa wickham for me
00:58:22oh my gosh i'm so scared
00:58:25anyone these days could call anyone and pretend to be on the phone
00:58:35uh hello
00:58:36yes
00:58:37yes
00:58:39what
00:58:44i'm going bankrupt
00:58:54hey hey hey
00:58:55hey hey
00:58:55are you sure that was the call sasa?
00:58:58that was a real call?
00:58:59people don't just suddenly go bankrupt like that
00:59:01my company's dead
00:59:03evaporated poof
00:59:04it's a thin air
00:59:08that's impossible
00:59:10who are you?
00:59:11what did you do?
00:59:13secretary cho
00:59:13you said you're the secretary of health right?
00:59:16and you yourself said that the armstrong family owns the entire global stock market
00:59:20could that be how they bankrupted miss wickham?
00:59:23then that means
00:59:24then that means
00:59:26you're really lysander armstrong
00:59:29the richest and most powerful man in the country
00:59:53who are you?
00:59:53please
00:59:54please
00:59:54please
01:00:00i know why you're all over tricksy
01:00:02because you've been in the military for so long
01:00:04you don't know what a real woman can do for you
01:00:07let me take you to my wedding chamber and i'll show you a good time
01:00:12please
01:00:13please
01:00:13move your hands for me
01:00:14or i'll have them removed for you
01:00:20i would never be interested in a woman who's as vile and cruel and wicked as you are
01:00:26guess the cheater gets cheated on eventually
01:00:31sasa was just trying to save the company
01:00:34i don't blame her at all
01:00:35your double standards are incredible
01:00:37okay you don't want me
01:00:39fine
01:00:39but there's plenty of other efficiency
01:00:42i can give you a room full of pageant winners
01:00:44eighteen years old
01:00:46fresh for the taking
01:00:53i did that so you wouldn't have to
01:00:55miss tricksy
01:00:56thank you devon
01:00:59marissa
01:01:00not only have you backstabbed me
01:01:02your best friend
01:01:03by stealing my fiance
01:01:05but now you'd sell out other innocent girls just to get your company back
01:01:09you're an insult to all good women out there
01:01:12no to all of humanity
01:01:13so now everything that i've ever given you to
01:01:17i'm taking it all back
01:01:21wait everyone stop
01:01:25they're impostors
01:01:30i just got off the phone with the president and she said your contract is not getting cancelled because it
01:01:35was assigned by the goddess healer herself
01:01:37so we won't go bankrupt
01:01:39the goddess healer
01:01:41you mean the eccentric and highly elusive sage in the field of medicine approved of my biomedical products?
01:01:47yes
01:01:47that's the highest honor anyone can have in the field of health and medicine
01:01:51the goddess healer's motto is
01:01:53the right rewrites the wrong
01:01:55the left leave the wrong
01:01:57the left
01:01:58that means she's rewarding me
01:02:00the president would never let your company go bankrupt
01:02:03in fact
01:02:04she's on her way now
01:02:07so you're telling me
01:02:09this dashingly handsome motherfucker over here
01:02:12isn't Lysander Armstrong?
01:02:14who the fuck cares who he is?
01:02:15if the president and the goddess healer
01:02:17approves of my products
01:02:19who cares about this washed up war hero?
01:02:21we can break his legs, break his arms
01:02:23no one would even bat an eye
01:02:24she even gave us explicit permission to call upon secret services
01:02:28FBI!
01:02:30FBI!
01:02:31you're under arrest for fraudulent claims and identity theft
01:02:36gotcha
01:02:41guess I still get the last laugh Trixie
01:02:43no don't arrest her
01:02:46Trixie's a good person
01:02:47please officer don't arrest her
01:02:49grandma, Mr. Rogers, Mrs. Williams
01:02:52what are you all doing here?
01:02:54the neighbors heard about the break up between you and Butch
01:02:56we were worried
01:02:58so we came here to back you up
01:03:00listen officer
01:03:01I can attest that Trixie Amoria is a good neighbor
01:03:04she's very kind hearted
01:03:06and would never break the law
01:03:08yes and one time when my daughter needed university tuition
01:03:11Trixie gave her everything she had just to help her out
01:03:15she also paid for my recent heart surgery as well
01:03:17my fiance really is an incredible woman
01:03:20she's an angel
01:03:22descended from heaven
01:03:28you must be the criminal pretending to be General Lysander Armstrong
01:03:32my brother is not a criminal
01:03:34he's a war hero who single-handedly saved this country from a terrorist attack
01:03:38without him this whole country would have been bombed to ash
01:03:41and that's why it's twice the crime is stealing his identity
01:03:45General Lysander Armstrong only fell into a coma because of the fight with the terrorist
01:03:49and we've received no word that he's woken up yet so this must be an imposter
01:03:54I can tell that this whole dilemma with my identity is causing you a lot of trouble
01:03:57but I promise that I'll get it resolved and we can focus on taking down your scumbag ex
01:04:04if you want to arrest me fine
01:04:07but don't fuck with my fiancee
01:04:09you don't get to decide punk
01:04:10let's go
01:04:34get him
01:04:34if you can
01:04:36Oh!
01:05:06Oh!
01:05:26Is that enough pain? Or do you want more?
01:05:37Legend is written all over you, Leicenander.
01:05:42Grandma.
01:05:44Meet my new fiancé.
01:05:48Wow, your new fiancé?
01:05:50He's so manly. Much better than your last one.
01:05:54I always knew you'd find someone better.
01:05:57It's Butch's loss.
01:05:58Trixie has always been so much better than Marissa.
01:06:01She's like a shining star in the sky and Marissa's like a roach in the sewers.
01:06:07Bitch, we name-calling now?
01:06:09I'll drown you out with insults from my side, right, fam?
01:06:12Drown out the poor!
01:06:13Drown out the poor!
01:06:15Drown out the poor!
01:06:16Drown out the poor!
01:06:18Drown out the poor!
01:06:19Drown out the poor!
01:06:20See, Trixie?
01:06:21You've got no connections, no power.
01:06:24You can't compete against me even if you have one guy on your side who can fight.
01:06:28We're too honorable to fight dirty like you.
01:06:30So you're using defenseless lives as your shield because you know we won't hurt them.
01:06:35Let them eat cake!
01:06:36Hmm.
01:06:46You can't shoot all of them.
01:06:48Grab what you can, fam.
01:06:49Attack!
01:07:07You will not hurt a single soul in my presence.
01:07:15What the fuck was that?
01:07:17I don't care what the fuck it was!
01:07:18I'm not letting her make a fool of me at my own wedding!
01:07:28Damn it!
01:07:29Damn it!
01:07:30Damn it!
01:07:32You forgot I had a gun, too?
01:07:35That'll teach you from messing with the Wighhams.
01:07:37Take Miss Trixie and her family and get out of here.
01:07:39We're cornered.
01:07:40I'll sacrifice myself to fend them off.
01:07:42Devon, you and your brother are both good men.
01:07:45I will not let your injury be in vain.
01:07:48They will be punished.
01:07:52Now hold still for me.
01:07:56Right.
01:07:57Rewrites the world.
01:08:08Holy fuck!
01:08:10Did she just reverse the bullet?
01:08:11By chanting the Goddess Healer's chant?
01:08:13Is she the Goddess Healer?
01:08:19I'm all better now.
01:08:20Thank you, Miss Trixie.
01:08:22See, I knew that you were no ordinary woman.
01:08:25No, please.
01:08:27I am just an ordinary girl.
01:08:28Don't put me on some sort of pedestal.
01:08:30Sure.
01:08:32You hear that?
01:08:33She's just some average homeless girl in the streets.
01:08:36She was probably holding out a super magnet that drew out the bullet.
01:08:39While I do not care for glory, I do believe in justice.
01:08:43Marissa and Butch, not only have you betrayed me, but now you've hurt the innocent too.
01:08:48I will make you both pay for your crimes.
01:08:50And who are you to judge me for what I do?
01:08:53God?
01:08:54Wrong.
01:08:56But you're close.
01:08:58Bullshit!
01:08:59I'm gonna show you how the elite can trail board you little lives.
01:09:04You wanna cross the line so bad?
01:09:06Then let's see you try.
01:09:07Charge!
01:09:17The hell is this?
01:09:19This is the line between life and death.
01:09:23Yo, was that extra neon spray paint?
01:09:26I'll admit it looks pretty good, but I'll die before I believe that's magic.
01:09:31You're not the Grim Reaper.
01:09:32What if it's a trap?
01:09:34That woman has many tricks up her sleeves.
01:09:36We ain't afraid of her.
01:09:37She's nothing but a circus prostitute.
01:09:40Why don't you cross the line and see for yourself?
01:09:43I will!
01:09:47Left leaves the wrong path.
01:09:56I'm fine. Nothing happened.
01:09:58You'll see soon enough.
01:10:00Oh, please.
01:10:01I really wanna die.
01:10:03And you call this the line between life and death?
01:10:05I knew you were just making that shit up.
01:10:07Whoops!
01:10:08Just crossed it again.
01:10:10Whoops!
01:10:11And again.
01:10:12Nothing's happening-
01:10:14Stop!
01:10:15Stop!
01:10:24No!
01:10:25No, Pop!
01:10:27What did you do to my brother?
01:10:29I didn't do anything.
01:10:31Your brother just didn't want to heed my warning.
01:10:34I suggest you take him to the U.R.
01:10:36If you don't want your wedding to become his funeral.
01:10:39Come on.
01:10:41Major.
01:10:41Are you not gonna help your own brother?
01:10:43How was he able to cross the line?
01:10:45See, this must be an illusion!
01:10:50Only the pure of heart can cross the line.
01:10:53Will somebody take my brother to the hospital, please?
01:11:01Please!
01:11:02You're so sore I wouldn't marry you if you'd go and hurt my brother.
01:11:05Oh, please.
01:11:06You hurt us first.
01:11:08At first, I was really hurt by your betrayal.
01:11:11But I've come to realize your true colors are that of a snake and a coward.
01:11:16Marissa, thanks for taking this low life from me.
01:11:20You blame yourself for being worthless.
01:11:23You think anyone would want to marry you when you've got nothing to offer?
01:11:28When you wear odd and crazy clothes all day?
01:11:34Don't touch my wife.
01:11:38And instead, Trixie gets a handsome and protective husband.
01:11:43You can daydream all you want now, Trixie.
01:11:45But when the presidential contract arrives, it'll hit you like a fucking truck.
01:11:49That you're nothing but an ugly phony and I'm the queen of everything.
01:11:52Oh, really?
01:11:54Then let me show you how it is I who has everything you want.
01:11:57You've got nothing on me.
01:12:02Yes.
01:12:03Tell the president to get here immediately.
01:12:10Goddess.
01:12:11Madam President, I require your assistance.
01:12:14Yes, we'll be there immediately.
01:12:19Get the VP. We're leaving now.
01:12:24Did she just pretend to call the first woman president of the United States?
01:12:28God, I knew you were cheap, but I didn't know you were crazy, too.
01:12:31I'm so glad I dumped you for Marissa.
01:12:34You're pathetic, Trixie.
01:12:36A secretary to remind everyone how I have the presidential contract coming?
01:12:39Miss Wickham is correct.
01:12:41I was on the phone with the president earlier.
01:12:43Only the most important people have Madam President's direct line.
01:12:47You hear that, everyone?
01:12:48There is no way low life Trixie could have called the president by herself.
01:12:54She's just a desperate phony who doesn't get enough male attention, so she's come here to play up her importance.
01:13:00No, my granddaughter would never do that.
01:13:03Reversing time just to heal someone's wound, only the goddess healer can do that.
01:13:08Is Trixie really the goddess healer?
01:13:17Oh, first, your boy toy actor pretends to be the war hero General Lysander Armstrong, and now you, Trixie, are
01:13:24pretending to be the goddess healer who gave me my presidential contract?
01:13:27Is this how the working class think all the time?
01:13:32I never realized how delusional they were.
01:13:34You can only dream of what you can never have while we rub our riches and privilege in their faces.
01:13:40Look, I don't know what circus school you went to, but you trying to make me jealous, Trixie? It ain't
01:13:45working.
01:13:46You can't just fake the...
01:13:50Yeah, but goddess healing power is legendary. It's like real magic.
01:13:54Trixie, you're an angel, but the goddess healing is beyond your imagination.
01:14:00And if we steal her identity just to punish her ex, won't her followers be furious and riot against you?
01:14:08No.
01:14:09Trixie, look, I believe you. You saved me.
01:14:14Whether you're a goddess or not, you did that.
01:14:17No matter what happens, you are a goddess to me.
01:14:21Who will riot against you now?
01:14:23Tear her apart!
01:14:24Tear her apart! Tear her apart! Tear her apart! Tear her apart! Tear her apart!
01:14:31The vice president arrives!
01:14:47who dare cause ruckus in here
01:14:53you're general lysander armstrong wait what he's actually general lysander armstrong no no
01:15:02we've been through this already once okay right secretary chill this actor trixie hired pulled
01:15:09this weird stunt to try to bankrupt me but you already confirmed with madame president that i
01:15:14got the contract coming still right yes we all thought he was a fraud what i mean is
01:15:20you're the war hero general lysander armstrong and how dare you crash miss wickham's wedding
01:15:27the moment you wake up you fall under this vixen spell and now you're attacking one of the most
01:15:33important allies to the president he is the general oh but he's in trouble now did you hear that even
01:15:41the vice president knows me as an important ally to the nation's leader so what if trixie picked
01:15:46up some washed up war hero we got the vp and the president on our side you'll always be nothing
01:15:54trixie i told you now punish them vice president langley this is treason lysander armstrong you are
01:16:01stripped from your military honors and titles
01:16:08hurry the goddess healer needs us you can't do that mr vice president my brother is a war hero he
01:16:17single-handedly saved this country from terrorist attack he was in a coma for two years if it wasn't
01:16:22firm as tricksy he would enough you speak another word and i will bring down your entire family not
01:16:28just your brother yeah it's okay mr vice president i've already given my life once for my country
01:16:36i have no problem doing that again if it means protecting my fiance's life and let's be honest
01:16:41about one other thing mr vice president i never gave a about any damn titles i truly saved a good
01:16:50man
01:16:56i will not let you bring ruin to my fiance and what can you do about it oh mr vice
01:17:02president i have
01:17:03swell idea my biomedical company invented the latest line of poison darts for the military let's try it
01:17:09out on them hold on mr vice president there's no way that you're taking this seriously put innocent
01:17:16civilian lives in danger despicable what's more despicable is that you and your filthy companions are
01:17:22disrespecting power miss wickham you can use full force on them did you hear that boys
01:17:42shoot wait that's the president
01:17:57oh my gosh i'm so sorry madam president that was they were totally aiming for uh tricksy the fraud in
01:18:13the
01:18:13middle what is this oh that's my new biomedical weapon madam for your military this is a war crime
01:18:20these are innocent civilian lives you're messing with you're the uncivilized buffoon i can shoot
01:18:26whoever i want i have the presidential contract with great power comes great responsibility and this is
01:18:31the kind of dastardly creation you've made with the contract i gave you what are you doing reverse the
01:18:36poison and take it out of the present before it's too late that is easy there's no need i'll save
01:18:43everyone
01:18:57it's raining gold what's happening trixie doesn't have that kind of money it's got to be cheap glitter
01:19:07she she is she is a criminal don't worry madam president we will arrest her and we'll throw her
01:19:14in prison i'd be quiet if i were you because you're the one that would be going to prison once
01:19:19everyone
01:19:19is healed up what are you talking about the president literally came here to give me my billion dollar
01:19:24contract
01:19:34this contract yeah yes thank you first gentlemen
01:19:56my contract you
01:19:59and that's not all
01:20:12this foul weapon will not see the light of day
01:20:14there is only a need for a vaccine if there is a virus don't you realize or are you too
01:20:20much of
01:20:21a goody two shoes to understand that you're the real virus here marissa money is worth more to you
01:20:27than human lives and that's something i cannot tolerate so prepare yourself because i'm about to smite you
01:20:35what are you gonna do the president is here and i just invented the best
01:20:41biomedical products in the world you'll pardon me for that little mishap right
01:20:47madam president you've recovered now so what's your final decision
01:20:53i'll
01:20:54she's gonna give me my billion dollar
01:21:02i'll smack her until she sees 50 stars
01:21:08why why are you attacking me madam president you're supposed to be giving me the billion dollar
01:21:14you wish you idiot
01:21:18i've never seen a woman so vile so ugly on the inside it makes me want to vomit
01:21:23i i i don't understand i was just trying to punish these imposters for posing as the goddess of healing
01:21:30and do you know the goddess healer saved me and my son during childbirth
01:21:36you've really seen the goddess healer herself in the flesh the one and only and it's
01:21:46her
01:21:58what
01:22:03welcome goddess
01:22:10Yes.
01:22:11Uh, we, uh...
01:22:15You really are the goddess of healing, aren't you?
01:22:18How else did you think I saved you?
01:22:21Then why did you keep it a secret for so long?
01:22:25I wanted to walk the earth as a normal person.
01:22:28To help those in need.
01:22:30And make sure the man I chose loved me for me.
01:22:33No, so that means the billion dollar contract, it was you who gave it to me?
01:22:39She took it away just like that.
01:22:42That was her golden ticket.
01:22:44You were once my fiancé and best friend.
01:22:47But after everything you've done, we're officially getting ties with you both.
01:22:51No, please, I swear. I didn't know you were an ex-wife.
01:22:57It doesn't matter who she is. Trixie has a heart of gold.
01:23:00She's an amazing person.
01:23:02And you ruined that the moment that you betrayed her.
01:23:05She's gonna be my wife.
01:23:07Because she is the most beautiful and amazing woman on this planet.
01:23:15I love you.
01:23:17I love you.
01:23:32One more time,
01:23:34I love you.
01:23:35I love you.
01:23:38I love you.
01:23:40I love you.
01:23:42You, you, himbo.
01:23:44Please, Trixie, give me another chance.
01:23:47I want to be rich again.
01:23:49I'll be your slave.
01:23:51Kiss the ground you walk on.
01:23:53You've had your chance to apologize, but it's too late now.
01:23:57All I see is your greed and how much you'd hurt others just to benefit yourself.
01:24:02You two should be locked up.
01:24:03And she shall.
01:24:05For creating illegal weapons of mass destruction, arrest Maritza and Butch Wickham.
01:24:11It's all your fault, Marissa.
01:24:13I never loved you.
01:24:14It's your fault.
01:24:15I was only with you for your money.
01:24:17I didn't care.
01:24:18You were rich.
01:24:19I'll send myself out.
01:24:22Rest assured, goddess.
01:24:24We will not be using these biomedical weapons.
01:24:27My platform is spreading kindness just like you.
01:24:31I knew you'd uphold our shared values.
01:24:33That is why I saved you.
01:24:35With these healing hands, I will work tirelessly to change the world one good deed at a time.
01:24:41Well, let's not let this wedding go to waste.
01:24:47Let's party!
01:24:48Wait, what if we just got married?
01:24:51Right now?
01:24:52Yes.
01:24:53Well.
01:24:54Woo!
01:24:56Do you take each other to be your lawfully wedded partner?
01:25:01I do.
01:25:02I do.
01:25:03You may kiss the bride.
01:25:07You may kiss the bride.
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