- 12 hours ago
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Short filmTranscript
00:00:01Healer goddess. Hear my plea. Please save my child.
00:00:23Rod of a sepulis.
00:00:42Rejuvening.
00:00:51Praise! She is the healer goddess!
00:00:55No, please. Don't call me about it. I'm just glad I could help.
00:01:04Here you go, miss.
00:01:09Why be weighed down by a throne when I can live amongst the common people and help those the most
00:01:13in need?
00:01:26You must be rushing off to go find your jewels! Because only a sackless coward would hit a puppy and
00:01:31run!
00:01:34Aw, it's okay, little guy. I'll fix you right up.
00:01:44Right rewrites the wrong.
00:01:48Rejuvening.
00:01:54See? Good as the day you can kick him out of your mother's womb.
00:01:59Come on, Cleo. Let's go!
00:02:10Hey, hey, hey!
00:02:16Please. My brother's been in a coma the last two years.
00:02:21We have no idea what the illness is. If anyone can help cure him, we will pay you handsomely.
00:02:26Be Lysander Armstrong. His military family basically owns the entire global stock market.
00:02:32He's so hot.
00:02:34Does he come with the money?
00:02:35Yes. He'll even marry you if you can cure him. Money. Fame. Power. It's all yours.
00:02:46Are we still moving forward, Miss Trixie?
00:02:48Yes. Give the presidential contract to Marissa.
00:02:51Oh, I have another call coming in.
00:02:55Grandma!
00:02:56I'm dying! Save me, Trixie!
00:03:00Grandma?
00:03:02Grandma.
00:03:02When are you getting married? I'm already a hundred years old.
00:03:07I'm gonna keep you healthy forever, Grandma.
00:03:09And Butch is still on deployment, so that's why I haven't been married yet.
00:03:16Oh, but why marry a vegetable when I can bang a younger stud like you?
00:03:22We're talking about my brother's life. I don't have time for jokes.
00:03:27No!
00:03:36Please go feed your dog, Miss. Don't let it starve like you.
00:03:39Oh, kind stranger. Let me repay you by granting you a wish.
00:03:43Grant me a wish? That you can barely feed yourself.
00:03:46The downfall of humanity. It all starts with the loss of faith.
00:03:51What? Oh, jeez, this is giving me a migraine. Are you telling me to pray to God because we've been
00:03:57doing that?
00:03:58I'm telling you to have some faith in me.
00:04:01Okay, uh, I wish for you to cure my brother's illness. Can you do that?
00:04:07I can topple mountains and make a king out of a frog if I wanted to.
00:04:11Cleo, stay right here for a second.
00:04:13Don't go too far, Cleo.
00:04:18Hold still.
00:04:25What? My migraine's gone. Okay, then let's go. If you can cure my brother, he'll even marry you. Come on.
00:04:32Come on.
00:04:33Oh!
00:04:47How is he? What is the diagnosis? Remember, you will not marry him unless you cure him.
00:04:53I'm sorry. I don't know what this is.
00:04:55Aren't you the queen of medicine? You're supposed to be one of the best.
00:04:58Don't worry, General. I'm the angel herbalist and I have mastered all healing methods of the East.
00:05:05I can detect what condition your son has with just one needle.
00:05:25I have no clue what this is.
00:05:29Oh, it looks like the angel herbalist doesn't live up to her name after all.
00:05:35That's why we saved the best for last.
00:05:37Me, the witch doctor.
00:05:39I'll save your son, Lysander.
00:05:52He's not budging. There's no movement.
00:05:54Truly, I have saved thousands of patients all over the world, but I don't know what this is.
00:06:01Lord, I've scoured the earth for the best doctors. They've tried all these methods and they've all failed.
00:06:07If we can't save him, there's only one person who can.
00:06:12Who?
00:06:15The goddess of healing.
00:06:19Wait a second. You're not talking about the legendary goddess healing.
00:06:23That's correct. Her right rewrites the rond and her left leaves the bereft. That's her motto.
00:06:31It's what makes her a sage amongst mortals. We are nothing compared to her.
00:06:36She is eccentric and elusive. No one has ever seen her before.
00:06:41If this legendary healer is the only one that can truly save my son, I don't care if I go
00:06:47bankrupt.
00:06:48I will find her. James, come put out a voucher to the entire world.
00:06:54Whoever finds the goddess healer will give her five million dollars.
00:06:59There's no need.
00:07:13I'll save your son.
00:07:16Who the hell is she?
00:07:18Dad, she says she can cure Lysander.
00:07:20She's gonna save your brother? Don't be ridiculous.
00:07:23How can this shit-stained hobo cure your brother?
00:07:27Exactly.
00:07:28God, the unemployed are getting crazier and crazier.
00:07:31She's trying to scam her way into marrying the rich.
00:07:34Ew! She even brought a filthy dog with her.
00:07:38I bet it has fleas.
00:07:39That flea-infested dirty thing is your companion.
00:07:44Don't try to steal Lysander Armstrong from us.
00:07:50Don't touch him.
00:07:54They say don't judge a book by its cover.
00:07:56But I can see from all your faces that you've failed.
00:07:59So step aside.
00:08:01I'll take it from here.
00:08:02Could you hold this?
00:08:04Ho, ho, ho, ho.
00:08:05You're not gonna touch my son.
00:08:07I'm the richest tycoon in this country and a former general.
00:08:11I know a gold-digging whore when I see one.
00:08:14I bet she's only here because giving blowjobs on the street corners wasn't paying enough cash.
00:08:20Who knows what an unskilled, poor girl like her would do for some.
00:08:24A skinny-ass beggar trying to take advantage of Lysander Armstrong when he's unconscious?
00:08:30Ew!
00:08:32Disgusting.
00:08:33Go back to being a prostitute.
00:08:34Security!
00:08:35Get this STD-infested peasant out of here now.
00:08:39Let's go.
00:08:39If you throw me out, you're tossing away your son's last chance at life.
00:08:47Sir, we are at our wit's end trying to find a cure for Master Lysander and to no avail.
00:08:52Maybe we should give her a try?
00:08:54You can always deal with her later if she turns out to be a fraud.
00:08:58Alright, I'll give you a shot.
00:09:00But I warn you, if you fail, I'll have your and your dog's head mounted on my wall.
00:09:07Is that any way to ask for help?
00:09:09You'd be blessed to have me.
00:09:12And I'm only here to repay your younger son's kindness.
00:09:15But since I'm not welcome here, I'll leave.
00:09:20Devon, come find me when you have a different wish.
00:09:22No, Miss Trixie. My brother is a hero to me. I can't lose him.
00:09:28Well, if he's a hero to you, then that means he must be a good person.
00:09:34My brother is a war hero who single-handedly saved this country from a terrorist attack.
00:09:38Also, he's great with puppies. He'd make a great husband.
00:09:43Who says I want to marry him?
00:09:45As if the number one hottest 30 under 30 would even dream of marrying a penniless bum like you.
00:09:52Only a lunatic would be crazy enough to marry her.
00:09:55I mean, look at her.
00:09:56Even if she cleaned herself up, you couldn't find an ounce of femininity on her.
00:10:01Only those cut from the lowest ranks were bigger over such trivial matters.
00:10:06Continue wasting your time.
00:10:07But I'm saving this patient.
00:10:18And...
00:10:20Oh, okay!
00:10:22What?
00:10:22I don't know.
00:10:23What's happening?
00:10:24What are we doing?
00:10:35What the hell are you doing?
00:10:39I knew she was a perv!
00:10:41She's definitely trying to steal Lysander from us.
00:10:44Do you all not know that Sweat can tell you everything that's medically wrong with a patient?
00:10:47Are you insane?
00:10:48Security, smash her face in for licking my son!
00:10:52He's born with congenital heart disease, has a peanut allergy, and the condition he has is called endogenic cryomorphy.
00:11:00Yeah, right! I mean, no way you got all that just from licking him!
00:11:04Oh, okay. I've studied every disease known to man, right?
00:11:07I even have the badge of universal medicine right here.
00:11:11And I've never heard of endo-cryo-what-what?
00:11:18This?
00:11:25Is worth nothing when I have the real thing right here.
00:11:28What?
00:11:29So you think that this crummy walking stick of yours is, what, THE rod of a sepulius?
00:11:36Why don't you go back to the homeless asylum where you came from if you're going to be this delusional?
00:11:41I agree. I mean, even if she does solve this medical mystery, what is the point of doctors who have
00:11:47studied for years?
00:11:48We are all certified.
00:11:50But Lysander does have congenital heart disease.
00:11:54She's right about everything.
00:11:58Yeah, but if she just throws out a bunch of fake diagnoses, one of them is bound to be right.
00:12:03And again, there is no such thing as endo-cryo-what-what!
00:12:07Endogenic cryomorphy.
00:12:08Oh.
00:12:09And of course none of you have heard of it.
00:12:10Because I just discovered it.
00:12:13This condition only affects those with both CHD and a peanut allergy.
00:12:17The chances are a billion to one.
00:12:19A hundred times rarer than winning the lottery.
00:12:22But lucky for you all, you've hit the jackpot by finding me.
00:12:26What a bunch of baloney.
00:12:28I mean, you wouldn't be homeless if you were actually any good.
00:12:33Precisely.
00:12:34You are just a scamming prostitute.
00:12:36You don't compare to meet us who actually studied real medicine.
00:12:41I bet you were too poor to go to real medical school.
00:12:45Oh, so she went to the stripper circus instead.
00:12:49And now she's here putting on this clown show coming up with fake diseases, which mean nothing if you can't
00:12:55wake him up.
00:12:56Is that supposed to be a challenge?
00:12:59Oh, yeah.
00:13:00If you three incompetent doormats want to show me up, I think you all should grow parts of your brain
00:13:06back.
00:13:07Which, by the way, that condition is called an encephaly.
00:13:11What is that supposed to mean?
00:13:13It means you're being schooled by me and I'm about to walk all over your medical licensees.
00:13:19Then let's have a bet.
00:13:21If you can't heal him, we'll break your hands.
00:13:26And then you can't pretend to have healing hands anymore.
00:13:32These hands have saved more lives than all three of you combined.
00:13:37You're that desperate to get rid of your competition, huh?
00:13:40Miss Trixie, don't risk your hands for them.
00:13:43There's too many lives at stake.
00:13:47Don't worry. I got this.
00:13:51It's a deal.
00:13:53I'll save Lysander Armstrong.
00:13:56No one is dying on my watch.
00:14:04Lysander Armstrong has been in a vegetative state for two years.
00:14:11Are you stopping me because you're scared I'd actually succeed?
00:14:14Homeless or not, if you save my son, I'll give you everything.
00:14:27I'll even have Lysander, my heir, marry you.
00:14:30I'm not doing this for the money or for a wealthy husband.
00:14:33I just believe in helping good people and doing the right thing.
00:14:38Prepare a Jacuzzi set at exactly 113 degrees Fahrenheit.
00:14:41Wait, wait, wait, wait. What for?
00:14:43Don't listen to her.
00:14:45She probably stinks so bad that she just wants a bath to wash the homeless stench off of her.
00:14:50Firstly, this is called greatness.
00:14:53Secondly, even if you drown yourself in plastic surgery, you couldn't get rid of your own ugly moral character.
00:15:01What? Did you just call me?
00:15:05There's a man's life at stake here, and you're standing in my way.
00:15:10Don't don the mantle of doctor when you're only capable of harm.
00:15:14Now stop getting in my way, or I promise you, you will be bubbling at the mouth very soon.
00:15:20Oh, yeah?
00:15:20Hey, you wanna see real pain? Where's the dog?
00:15:23Well, put down the dog!
00:15:24With pleasure.
00:15:35Oh!
00:15:41Left leaves the wrong breath.
00:15:47You don't deserve to call yourself a doctor.
00:15:53She's been poisoned!
00:15:56It was her!
00:15:57Do you see any poison on me?
00:16:00Medicine in the right hands can save lives, but in the wrong hands, it becomes nothing but poison.
00:16:06This bitch isn't good enough to take down the queen of medicine!
00:16:09Do you have one of your antidotes on you?
00:16:11Of course.
00:16:12I've saved entire civilizations with my antidotes.
00:16:16If I wanna save someone, even the Grim Reaper can't stop me.
00:16:35Why is she spitting blood?
00:16:37This wasn't supposed to happen!
00:16:39I thought you said even the Grim Reaper can't get in your way, angel herbalist.
00:16:43This is what I call...
00:16:45Malpractice.
00:16:47This isn't fatal. She'll live.
00:16:49But she deserves a little punishment.
00:16:52Well, where's the jacuzzi I asked for?
00:16:54Jacuzzi is ready?
00:16:55Right this way.
00:16:56Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait!
00:16:58What the hell is going on?
00:16:59You say you want your son to live on to give you tons of grandchildren, don't you?
00:17:03Then stop getting in my way.
00:17:05Every second counts.
00:17:08Let's go for our dip, shall we?
00:17:13General Armstrong, your family is the richest and most powerful in the nation.
00:17:19Are you really gonna let this hobo slut touch your son?
00:17:23Hold on. You two are going in there... alone?
00:17:27If you don't want these drooling vultures to see your son naked, then sure, invite everyone in.
00:17:32Alright, but I warn you, no funny business.
00:18:10There's no big business in front of you.
00:18:11I think you'd go back to a secret.
00:18:12I'm going back to the wall.
00:18:13To be honest with you for the whole world.
00:18:14You're not as close as a bridge in your face, your son naked, your son naked.
00:18:30I'm going to come back to the wall around.
00:18:31No, I'm sorry.
00:18:38you really shouldn't leave your precious son in there with that homeless con woman
00:18:42general armstrong exactly what if she gets pregnant by him she could blackmail you for
00:18:49millions that's what i would do if i was that poor and then the armstrong family will be the
00:18:54laughingstock of the nation held for ransom by a homeless woman dad you can't seriously be
00:19:01listening to that we have to have faith where did you actually find this little light
00:19:08on the streets are you shitting me you found this bum on the streets are you nuts you don't know
00:19:16her you don't know her background she could be a psychotic murder that is it general you have to
00:19:21go in and stop this now you're right that's it i'm shutting down this clown show right now
00:19:26james let's go yes sir oh my god
00:19:38i told you all to stay out
00:19:45this is a critical moment for you we can't be interrupted otherwise we both die
00:19:54i'm not gonna let this homeless hoochie mama trap my son
00:20:00i'm gonna save him myself
00:20:06you see that general this isn't just a gull-dicking con woman
00:20:10this is witchcraft i know what this is this is the dark witch i've heard of her she uses her
00:20:19dark
00:20:20magic to steal the hearts of young handsome men and then she eats them alive oh i'm gonna kill
00:20:25that bitch before she takes my son james get the swat team yes sir
00:20:33you regain consciousness
00:20:45help me i just want
00:20:52something's wrong
00:20:56you were drunk with an aphrodisiac
00:20:59lysander armstrong and his fortune will soon be mine
00:21:04that's one more thing i'm saving you from
00:21:13sir
00:21:14sir the swat team is here captain morales
00:21:18my son is trapped behind there with a devious man-eating witch i need you to do whatever you can
00:21:25to tear down that door
00:21:27rest assured general armstrong
00:21:29we'll break down that door and bury that bitch alive
00:21:36bright
00:21:37rewrite the wrong
00:21:42human
00:21:46who the fuck are you
00:21:47and why the hell are we naked
00:21:51good
00:21:51you're awake
00:21:52i'm saving you
00:21:54saving me
00:21:55by bathing with me
00:21:58who are you a fucking spy
00:22:00talk
00:22:01i swear to god i'll have you arrested for this
00:22:05you're the one who's trying to kiss me in your stippor
00:22:10i will never
00:22:10i will never
00:22:23i will
00:22:25look who's guilty now
00:22:29look i don't know what the fuck this is
00:22:30alright but it is a
00:22:31biological fact
00:22:33a man
00:22:34is attracted
00:22:35to
00:22:36a
00:22:37naked woman
00:22:37and her breasts
00:22:38science okay
00:22:40it just means that my body
00:22:41oh shut up
00:22:41is physically
00:22:44you're distracting me with your funny
00:22:47and i'm a professional
00:22:49i hear lysander's voice
00:22:50captain do something now
00:22:52ready
00:22:52ready
00:22:58we're almost there
00:22:59aim
00:23:02get em boys
00:23:04get em
00:23:05fire
00:23:09fire
00:23:10fire
00:23:11fire
00:23:11fire
00:23:11fire
00:23:11fire
00:23:11fire
00:23:12fire
00:23:13fire
00:23:15fire
00:23:17fire
00:23:29fire
00:23:29fire
00:23:29fire
00:23:29fire
00:23:29fire
00:23:29fire
00:23:30fire
00:23:30fire
00:23:30fire
00:23:30fire
00:23:30fire
00:23:30fire
00:23:30fire
00:23:30fire
00:23:30fire
00:23:30fire
00:23:30fire
00:23:30fire
00:23:30fire
00:23:35fire
00:23:35fire
00:23:38fire
00:23:38fire
00:23:38She's not the Dark Witch.
00:23:40Young Master Armstrong, you are too easily fooled.
00:23:44This homeless psycho doesn't even have the skills to make a living.
00:23:48How is she going to save someone else's life?
00:23:50That's right.
00:23:51The Queen Angel and I are already the top female doctors in the world.
00:23:55If we can't save him, no one can.
00:23:58Except for the goddess healer.
00:24:00Think about it.
00:24:00We heard Lysander's voice.
00:24:02He's been in a coma for two years.
00:24:04Miss Trixie must have woken him up.
00:24:05You're right.
00:24:06And this homeless girl is maybe the goddess.
00:24:12Maybe this homeless girl is really the goddess.
00:24:15No, no.
00:24:16Absolutely not.
00:24:17There is no way this hobo girl is better than us.
00:24:21How could you know for sure?
00:24:22Right now, what we need to do is not interrupt Miss Trixie.
00:24:26You're wrong, sir.
00:24:27This homeless snake is using the forbidden techniques on Master Lysander.
00:24:31It's called borderline revival.
00:24:33She uses torturous pain to wake the patient, but only temporarily.
00:24:39It's a trick to pull the wool over your eyes and ears.
00:24:43That means my son is in tremendous pain.
00:24:46I'm going to ask you two to do whatever you can to kill that antler rod bearing witch.
00:24:52My son doesn't deserve this.
00:24:53He is dying right now, naked in a jacuzzi with a smelly vagrant.
00:24:58Then it looks like it's up to me.
00:25:00The witch doctor.
00:25:02Only I know the right techniques to take her down.
00:25:06My son's life is in your hands.
00:25:09You heal him, I will give you whatever your heart desires.
00:25:13I don't know who you are, but there is no way I am letting you rip my golden bachelor away
00:25:19from me.
00:25:21This isn't the finishing touch.
00:25:24I must now give you the kiss of life.
00:25:27So we can both survive.
00:25:47It's poison gas.
00:25:49That poison gas will smoke them out and end her torture over Master Lysander.
00:25:54Poison gas?
00:25:56My son is in there.
00:25:58You're jeopardizing his life as well.
00:26:00No, don't worry, General.
00:26:01Gold diggers like her only care about themselves.
00:26:04Soon, she'll come out crying to Mommy.
00:26:08Then we can reverse the poison on your son.
00:26:10And then he can marry one of us.
00:26:12They really won't stop until they get both of us killed.
00:26:18I knew they promised you that I'd save you.
00:26:21It's now or never.
00:26:34What the hell are they doing in there?
00:26:37It's been over ten minutes.
00:26:38Wait a second.
00:26:40You don't think that they're...
00:26:42You!
00:26:43You suffocated my brother and Miss Trixie in there!
00:26:45Don't point your fingers at me!
00:26:47If your brother's dead, it's because of that homeless gold digger.
00:26:50Oh my god.
00:26:51Yeah?
00:26:52She's the one who sealed the door shut.
00:26:54I mean, she probably locked themselves in there on accident.
00:26:58Miss Trixie wouldn't have to do that if you weren't trying to sabotage her from saving my brother.
00:27:02This is taking way too long.
00:27:05Captain Morales, it's time to get out the big guns.
00:27:09These bazookas can flatten even a bomb shelter.
00:27:12Bazooka.
00:27:13She won't be able to hide even if she's the devil himself.
00:27:16Crap.
00:27:17Oh my god.
00:27:17Get back, son.
00:27:19Ready.
00:27:21Aim!
00:27:22Oh shit.
00:27:27Quit your whining and stand down.
00:27:41The parasite's been extracted.
00:27:43Shoot her dead now.
00:27:45Do I need to fix your hearing too?
00:27:46I said stand down.
00:27:50Don't listen to her.
00:27:51She's a fraud.
00:27:52A termite to the field of medicine.
00:27:54I just saved this man that otherwise would have died in your care.
00:27:58If I'm a termite, then you're worse than a disease spreading tick.
00:28:03Wait a second.
00:28:03Are you saying you cured my son?
00:28:06He'll wake in just a moment.
00:28:07You can see for yourself.
00:28:09Well now you're just asking to be exposed.
00:28:12That is it.
00:28:13No more stalling, General.
00:28:15If you won't punish her, I will.
00:28:21Don't hurt her.
00:28:27He's a cure.
00:28:33His pulse is regular.
00:28:35In fact, it's never been better.
00:28:40There's no sign of illness, infection, or disease.
00:28:51Miss Trixie did it, Dad.
00:28:53Lysander's warm again.
00:28:54He's not cold and pale like before.
00:28:56And his heart is strong.
00:28:58Come, feel it.
00:29:01I saved my son.
00:29:03Next time, don't go seeking medical advice from those with ill will.
00:29:07Your son would have otherwise died by their greedy and unskilled hands.
00:29:11I've learned my lesson.
00:29:13I will not let these two nutjobs ever practice their voodoo voodoo magic again.
00:29:18Wait, wait.
00:29:19No, no.
00:29:19There is only one person in the world who is more skilled in the field of medicine than the queen,
00:29:25angel, and I.
00:29:28The goddess healer.
00:29:33Could you really be the goddess of healing?
00:29:36But rumor has it that the goddess of healing is well over 100 years old, and you don't look a
00:29:42day after 20.
00:29:43It doesn't matter who I am.
00:29:45What matters is that the patient is healthy again.
00:29:48Devon, I've repaid your kindness by fulfilling your wish of saving your brother.
00:29:52Take care.
00:29:53No, wait.
00:29:54Miss Trixie, we still haven't fulfilled our promise to you yet.
00:29:57He's right.
00:29:58We are men of our words, and as I promised you, my heir, Lysander, would take you as a wife
00:30:03if you cured him, and you did just that.
00:30:06Of course, you're welcome to marry me instead.
00:30:08Oh, I really appreciate it, but I'm sorry, I... I'm already engaged.
00:30:19Already engaged?
00:30:20I am.
00:30:21I've been patiently awaiting his return from deployment for the last three years, and he's coming back today.
00:30:27But don't be disappointed.
00:30:29Really, I'm no one special.
00:30:31I just got lucky with your brother.
00:30:33Some guru taught me that spa water can cure all kinds of ailments.
00:30:36But you're still Lysander's savior. Please, let me give you what I promised. Take the gold.
00:30:41No, really.
00:30:43I don't need anything.
00:30:45I just believe in doing good in the world.
00:30:51Trixie, it's your fiancé.
00:30:53He's back, and he says he's breaking up with you.
00:30:58I must go.
00:31:05Hobo close.
00:31:07Halo glow.
00:31:09I bet the goddess healer is just like Miss Trixie.
00:31:12It was just dumb luck.
00:31:14She's even dumber for not accepting his marriage proposal.
00:31:17She could have been the richest woman in the world,
00:31:19marrying the hottest, most powerful bachelor around.
00:31:25I'm going to marry that homeless woman.
00:31:31Oh, my God.
00:31:33I mean, I don't know about that homeless bimbo, but this is godly.
00:31:39No, no, no, no, Lysander.
00:31:42Lysander's job is supposed to be mine.
00:31:45I'd so much rather share him with you than let that penniless, ugly bitch have him.
00:31:50You two nutjobs are a disgrace to your profession.
00:31:53Take these two weirdos out of here and revoke their licenses.
00:31:57No.
00:31:58We're not brides.
00:31:59No, she's just better than us.
00:32:02Oh, my God.
00:32:04Oh, my God.
00:32:05We were truly blessed to have Miss Trixie here, huh?
00:32:09She's no average Jane.
00:32:10No, she isn't.
00:32:11She said it was just dumb luck.
00:32:13But if she truly had these special skills,
00:32:16why did she wear that shit-stained dress and had an impeccable-looking doll?
00:32:19But think about the impenetrable walls.
00:32:21No normal person could have done that.
00:32:23Goddess or not, homeless or not, I don't care.
00:32:26I have never met a woman like that.
00:32:28I have to find her.
00:32:29I have to make her my wife.
00:32:31She won my heart over, too.
00:32:32But if my bestest big bro wants her, I'll help you find her.
00:32:36All right, listen.
00:32:37I need help finding three wedding gifts.
00:32:45I'm dumping Trixie.
00:32:46So I want you, your granddaughters, filthy things, out of my house now.
00:32:53Trixie paid for this house.
00:32:55She waited for you for three years.
00:32:58She was dumb enough to put my name on the lease.
00:33:00And I'm upgrading for a better girlfriend now.
00:33:02One with some serious fuck you money.
00:33:05So get lost.
00:33:06Who gave you permission to bark like a rabbit hyena in my house?
00:33:16Grandma.
00:33:17Beatrice, Trixie, Amore.
00:33:21I've been dying to throw this in your face.
00:33:23I'm dumping you for your best friend, Marissa.
00:33:27In fact, the wedding's tomorrow.
00:33:30So sign over to the house now.
00:33:37You gave me this ring and asked me to wait.
00:33:40And I did.
00:33:41For three years while you were deployed.
00:33:44Yet you cheat on me with my best friend.
00:33:46And now you're trying to swindle my home?
00:33:50Do you have no shame?
00:33:51We were together for three years and, uh, it was a complete waste of my life
00:33:55when I could have been with a loaded girl like Marissa.
00:34:03That's how much you would owe me if I was in the rent-a-boyfriend business.
00:34:09I see you're fulfilling your highest aspirations of being a low-grade male prostitute.
00:34:17Oh, yeah?
00:34:19Well, Marissa is so much better than you.
00:34:22Now, she grew up even poorer than you.
00:34:26And now, she's the CEO of an entire corporation.
00:34:33And you?
00:34:35You're still nothing.
00:34:37So you think she's an upgrade?
00:34:39Of course she's an upgrade.
00:34:41Look what she, uh, got me for my engagement.
00:34:45Oops.
00:34:47Yeah.
00:34:47That's maybe worth one millionth the presidential contract I gave her.
00:34:57You gave her the presidential contract?
00:34:59I certainly did.
00:35:01In fact, Marissa, you and your dimwit brother only have everything you have all thanks to me.
00:35:13Oh, I think she's losing it, bro.
00:35:15That breakup must have hit her hard.
00:35:18You two are the ungrateful, cheating scum here.
00:35:21My granddaughter supported you and your entire family for three years while you were gone.
00:35:28How dare you insult her?
00:35:31It's okay, Grandma.
00:35:32Let's not stoop to that level.
00:35:35Poor Edna.
00:35:36She still doesn't know what you're doing out there on the streets, huh?
00:35:39What is he talking about, Jersey?
00:35:41Show her, Bob.
00:35:47This is how embarrassingly useless your granddaughter is.
00:35:50She didn't purchase this house on her own.
00:35:52She was begging on the street for money.
00:35:56I can't be caught with a piss-poor nobody like you.
00:35:59Even if you got no game, I got street credit I got out of keep.
00:36:03You dig?
00:36:03The word you're looking for is dignity.
00:36:06And you're one to speak, cheater.
00:36:10Is this true, Trixie?
00:36:15I've been broadening my horizons, Grandma.
00:36:17I want to see how regular, everyday people live so that I can help them.
00:36:22Of course, those without substance underneath would never understand that.
00:36:27What is that supposed to mean?
00:36:28It means the new girlfriend you think is an upgrade is actually a downgrade.
00:36:37Enough bullshitting already.
00:36:38Just sign the damn papers and we can each get on with our lives.
00:36:54At your wedding, I will.
00:36:56What?
00:36:57If you won't do good by me of breaking things off before two-timing me with my best friend,
00:37:02why should I do good by you?
00:37:04I'll give you my John Hancock at your wedding as a charity to you.
00:37:10Fucking bitch!
00:37:11You better keep your word.
00:37:13Oh, that's rich.
00:37:15After tomorrow, you will never feel so rich ever again.
00:37:18Do remember that.
00:37:26Trixie, Marissa's a millionaire now.
00:37:29They'll destroy you if you show even so much as a hair at their wedding.
00:37:33Grandma, I have to confess something to you.
00:37:36I've secretly amassed a fortune worth trillions.
00:37:40Trillions?
00:37:42That would make you the richest person on the planet.
00:37:47It's because of the healing hands I inherited from Asseplius, the god of healing.
00:37:52I've saved several world leaders with these hands.
00:37:56That's how I was able to give Marissa the presidential contract and become the goddess healer.
00:38:01It makes me angrier hearing her name knowing how she betrayed you.
00:38:05But please, Trixie dear, I know it was to broken your heart.
00:38:10But embellishing your worth and who you are, it will only delay the healing process.
00:38:17You don't have to believe me just yet.
00:38:19After we lost mom and dad because we didn't have the money for their medical bills.
00:38:24I vowed that I would do everything I can to serve those in need.
00:38:29That's why I'm taking everything back from Butch and I'm giving it back to charity.
00:38:33You've always had an angel's heart.
00:38:35I'm certain you will meet someone who will treat you right.
00:38:38Who actually deserves you.
00:38:41You will see tomorrow, Grandma.
00:38:45Oh, yeah.
00:38:50You said Trixie's crashing your wedding.
00:38:53She was bullying us too, Sasa.
00:38:55She's probably trying to extort you now that she knows you're rich as fuck.
00:39:00When hope when nobody steps on Snake, Snake bites back hard.
00:39:04So let her come and embarrass herself.
00:39:07Yeah.
00:39:08You mean...
00:39:10We broadcast that video of me?
00:39:16Yes.
00:39:17Her cavewoman's take the 19th century tin can.
00:39:20She'll prop me up higher on my pedestal and the whole world sees her in her homeless mess
00:39:24against my presidential glow up.
00:39:26Let's turn this party into her funeral.
00:39:35There he is.
00:39:38Welcome home, brother.
00:39:40Welcome home, General!
00:39:44Sir, the homeless woman who saved you, Miss Trixie, this is the file of her ex, Butch Tanner.
00:39:49He served with your regiment in the Marines.
00:39:51You mean the Butch Tanner that can barely carry supplies?
00:39:54Well, she's been providing for him and his entire family while he's been deployed overseas, sir.
00:39:58So she waited for him for years and then he betrayed her.
00:40:01Fucking coward.
00:40:02According to intel, she's planning to bring it down on them at their wedding.
00:40:05Then we should join her.
00:40:08Men, I'm only alive today because of that virtuous woman and her incredible power that saved my life.
00:40:13So she needs our support.
00:40:14Will you join me in protecting her?
00:40:16Yes, sir!
00:40:17We will allow our lives to protect her, sir!
00:40:20Then let's roll.
00:40:36Welcome, everyone, to my wedding.
00:40:39Today is a very special day for me and Butch.
00:40:41Not only are we getting married, but in just one hour, my company will be receiving the presidential contract,
00:40:46allowing my biomedical company to go public.
00:40:53Congratulations on the contract once again, Mrs.
00:40:55Wakeham.
00:40:56Stowe, Butch is taking my last name.
00:40:59Oh, and please don't be so uptight, Secretary Cho.
00:41:02You are the secretary of the entire U.S. Health Department, but this is a partay after all.
00:41:07I see some of the most important people in the nation have also arrived to celebrate you.
00:41:13The U.S. president will also be arriving soon to give you the contract herself.
00:41:19It's an honor.
00:41:20And that's why Sasa is the best wife a man could ever dream of.
00:41:25We will make sure the crowd is entertained tonight.
00:41:28We'll let the wedding begin!
00:41:32Not so fast.
00:41:33The party doesn't start until I say it does.
00:41:58You two really are a match made in hell.
00:42:01So I've come to save your guests from this oncoming train wreck.
00:42:04I don't recognize her from any of our elite circles.
00:42:07Who is she?
00:42:08Um, this is our entertainment for tonight, sir.
00:42:11Just watch.
00:42:15Trixie, what are you doing here?
00:42:16This isn't the homeless shelter.
00:42:17You lost.
00:42:18I bet she's here to bum a meal off us.
00:42:20You know, being this poor.
00:42:24Me, bum a meal.
00:42:26Have you forgotten that it was I who bankrolled you two for the last three years?
00:42:29And what evidence do you have of that?
00:42:32Look at me, then go look at yourself in the mirror.
00:42:34I'm a millionaire CEO.
00:42:36Even the first woman president will be here any second now to congratulate me.
00:42:40And you're nothing but a washed up sewer rat.
00:42:44Sasa.
00:42:44She's like, it's so obsessed with me.
00:42:46She's like, see everyone?
00:42:49Butch already cut ties with his ex, but she's so shameless and desperate that she'd still
00:42:55show up to my wedding to suck up to me.
00:42:58This is what poor, sad girls do.
00:43:00They beg for scraps from us, the rich and glorious.
00:43:05Rejecting much, Marissa?
00:43:06You might feel all high and mighty now, but don't bite the hand that feeds you.
00:43:11Especially when I'm the one who's giving you the contract.
00:43:18You giving me the contract?
00:43:21You have no skills, no education, no connection.
00:43:25So how could you possibly have a pool to get the U.S. fucking president to give me a billion
00:43:30dollar contract?
00:43:31We both share humble beginnings, Marissa.
00:43:34And I saw potential in you.
00:43:36Even trusted you as my best friend.
00:43:38But I recognize now that greed has poisoned you.
00:43:41Don't be all sore now just because I stole your man.
00:43:45This is what us rich girls do.
00:43:47They steal from lame spinsters for fun.
00:43:50Damn right.
00:43:51You were too embarrassing for me.
00:43:55Sasa tramples you any day.
00:43:56I can say that now that I'm marrying the rich.
00:43:59Bravo.
00:44:01Self-admission of a gold digger.
00:44:02Quick, somebody put that on a memoir.
00:44:04Sasa, she's embarrassing me in front of everyone.
00:44:07She'll make her sup.
00:44:07Don't listen to her, everyone.
00:44:09She's the gold digging, blood sucking leech.
00:44:12I don't even have to lift a finger and you're already embarrassing yourself in front of everyone
00:44:16for me, butch.
00:44:18You may look and sound like a man, but you're nothing but a pathetic coward.
00:44:23Okay, enough.
00:44:24You know what I always couldn't stand about you?
00:44:26Your moral posturing.
00:44:28But guess what?
00:44:30Morals are just lies to make you and girls feel better about yourselves.
00:44:33That's why no man will choose you over Marissa Trixie.
00:44:37Because I've got the material goods.
00:44:39And you're just all empty talk.
00:44:40I'm not here to request to be chosen.
00:44:43Because I'm the one who's doing the choosing.
00:44:47See this?
00:44:56Oh my god.
00:45:01Is that the billion dollar contract for Sasa?
00:45:06The one that's supposed to make us all rich as fuck?
00:45:08No, absolutely not.
00:45:10I don't believe it.
00:45:12You all sound so scared already.
00:45:14Don't worry.
00:45:15This isn't that contract.
00:45:17It's the lease to the modest home you try to swindle from me.
00:45:22I don't see everyone.
00:45:24She's just trying to bluff us.
00:45:26But you don't even have the guts to go all the way.
00:45:28Look at her following orders.
00:45:29I asked her to sign over the lease and here she is.
00:45:32Like a good little peasant slave.
00:45:35That house is for all her life savings.
00:45:40You want to, I don't know, beg for a little treat while you're at it?
00:45:54You misunderstand me.
00:45:56I'm here to take back everything I've ever given you.
00:45:59I'm giving it to charity.
00:46:02I'm giving it to charity.
00:46:03Oh my god.
00:46:07Bro.
00:46:08She's gone cuckoo in the head.
00:46:10She thinks that just because she rented a pretty little dress she can pretend to be a deep pocket and
00:46:14invest in baddies.
00:46:15You wish you had that kind of money to just toss away, Trixie.
00:46:18It's just a drop in the bucket for me.
00:46:20I know what this is.
00:46:22You've gotten delusional.
00:46:24And you think you're Cinderella so you can just show up to a fancy party and some Prince Charming will
00:46:29scoop you into money forever?
00:46:30Well, that's not happening.
00:46:32Security, lock the doors.
00:46:34This woman doesn't leave until we're through with her.
00:46:39This is where your dreams will die, bitch.
00:46:45We found Miss Trixie Lysander.
00:46:47She's being cornered by her ex and his mistress at the Wickham wedding right now.
00:46:49Butch Tanner.
00:46:51Well, he's going to wish he died in battle after I'm done with him.
00:46:54Let's go.
00:46:58You think a few toy guns scare me, Marissa?
00:47:01I've saved plenty of people for much worse.
00:47:04Including your head of command, Butch.
00:47:07General Lysander Armstrong.
00:47:09You mean the legendary war hero?
00:47:12He's been in a coma for years after he saved the nation from a terrorist attack.
00:47:16You're an unskilled, unemployed, ugly leech.
00:47:20So how could you possibly have this magical ability to heal someone like General Lysander Armstrong?
00:47:26No one here is going to believe you.
00:47:27If you really cured the incurable general, then Sasa is the fucking Virgin Mary.
00:47:32And she's not.
00:47:33You're just asking to be humiliated, Trixie.
00:47:36Show them, Butch.
00:47:43See for yourselves, everyone.
00:47:45Trixie's just a freeloading beggar.
00:47:51She won't leave me and Marissa alone, because we're rich as fuck now.
00:47:55I'm a major in the Marines.
00:47:57Sasa, she has a billion-dollar biomedical contract with the military.
00:48:03Approved by the first female president of the United States herself, bitch.
00:48:08How despicable.
00:48:09She's just trying to leech off you like a parasitic gold digger.
00:48:13Get out of here.
00:48:14No one wants to marry you.
00:48:15No free meals for the poor.
00:48:17Do you see this, Trixie?
00:48:19This is high society.
00:48:21So you're either born on a silver spoon, or you're as accomplished as me to be here.
00:48:26Maybe if you do some serious dick-sucking here, maybe someone will drop a couple bucks in your tin can.
00:48:35I already have everything one can dream of, but I valued our friendship, Marissa, which is why I came here
00:48:40to give you a second chance, to see if you'd apologize and admit to your backstabbing.
00:48:45But no.
00:48:46You stooped so low, it disgusts me.
00:48:49Nothing is more disgusting than you standing on street corners like a bum.
00:48:54And who knows if you've already started offering sexual services.
00:48:59Well then, why don't you get on your knees for me, Trixie?
00:49:03My brother will never take you back.
00:49:06No man will marry an embarrassment like you.
00:49:09But make me happy?
00:49:11I might consider making you my personal prostitute.
00:49:25How dare you hit my brother?
00:49:27I'm never letting you leave here alive.
00:49:30That's awesome.
00:49:31I do something.
00:49:32Don't worry, my dear.
00:49:33After I'm done with you, Trixie, not even the goddess of healing will be able to save you.
00:49:39Oh, is that so?
00:49:42Security!
00:49:44Get down on your knees and give Bob one hell of a blowjob in front of everybody here, or I'll
00:49:50pop so many holes in you, the men here won't know which one to fuck.
00:49:54I don't need to be the goddess of anything to punish you.
00:49:57Any of the powerful leaders I've saved before could crush you before you even touch me.
00:50:02Dream on!
00:50:04You wish General Lysander scooped you off your feet, but you weren't good enough for me.
00:50:08You're definitely not good enough for him.
00:50:10Enough!
00:50:12You're souring my party, so you either get the fuck out, or I'm gonna shoot you.
00:50:18On the count of three!
00:50:20I think I quite like it here.
00:50:21Two!
00:50:22Two!
00:50:32Mmm.
00:50:33This wine is so delicious.
00:50:36One!
00:50:37Shoot!
00:50:40Nobody is laying a hand on my future wife.
00:50:49It's...
00:50:50It's...
00:51:00Who the hell is this?
00:51:06I'm sorry that I'm late.
00:51:07Did they hurt you?
00:51:09No, I'm fine.
00:51:11But, um, when did I become your future wife?
00:51:15You saved me, Trixie, remember?
00:51:18I'm a man of my word.
00:51:20They're never gonna hurt you ever again.
00:51:22Really, it was nothing.
00:51:24I saved you because you're a good man, not because I want you to owe me any favors.
00:51:35I see what this is.
00:51:36You're the one who cheated on me, Trixie.
00:51:38Look at you guys all lovey-dove.
00:51:40Don't try to pin this on her.
00:51:41She waited for you for three years.
00:51:43This is the kind of woman of virtue that a man would die for.
00:51:48Virtue?
00:51:50Don't make me laugh.
00:51:51She's probably out there giving blowjobs for cash.
00:51:54No man who, in a hundred-foot pole, would want to touch her.
00:51:58She should be happy Bob was willing to give her some.
00:52:05I see her in the Marines.
00:52:08I'm a major, you know, look man.
00:52:11I know Trixie is like, uh, I don't know, like a seven now that she's all cleaned up,
00:52:16but don't waste your manhood on a whiny, worthless woman like that.
00:52:25A real man never talks about a woman that way.
00:52:29You're a coward.
00:52:40We don't need to fight fire with fire to deal with the likes of them.
00:52:44You're very gracious Trixie, you know that?
00:52:49You're only getting off of it because she's so kind.
00:52:51So you're going to do me the favor of never coming near her again.
00:52:53You understand?
00:52:54You want to fuck with me, little dipshit?
00:52:56I'm a fucking major.
00:52:58You're probably lowest rank of the military grunts.
00:53:01I'll destroy you.
00:53:03Do you really not know who this is, Butch?
00:53:05I thought you were in the Marines.
00:53:07What have you been doing this whole time if you don't know who this war hero is?
00:53:11He was just a supply boy.
00:53:13What?
00:53:15War hero?
00:53:17Is this all part of your plan, Trixie?
00:53:19Poor girl.
00:53:21Did you sell your house to hire this actor so you can feel better about yourself?
00:53:25A woman's worth is tied to the man she marries.
00:53:28Trixie is worthless because that guy looks like a cowboy.
00:53:33A bum girl and a pimp.
00:53:36What a pair.
00:53:38It seems like they don't know who you are since you've been out of action for so long.
00:53:42Maybe we should try to pay some off some more, don't you think?
00:53:46Bring in the wedding gifts.
00:53:55What is all this?
00:53:56Trixie, listen.
00:53:57I know that you didn't ask for anything after you saved my life.
00:54:01But I know that we shared a moment.
00:54:06I'm not the kind of man to get close to a woman and then just disappear.
00:54:10It's not in my nature.
00:54:12I'm like somebody else here.
00:54:14Listen, Trixie, I have never met a woman like you.
00:54:21So incredible and kind and beautiful.
00:54:25So I know that you're the one for me.
00:54:29This guy's either nuts or a really, really good actor.
00:54:34Oscar worthy. Oscar worthy.
00:54:37First gift.
00:54:43Trixie, I know that you just lost your home, so I'm gifting you with your own new mansion.
00:54:49Worth $500 million, previously owned by Jennifer Aniston.
00:54:55Second gift.
00:54:58This contains all the rights to my entire fortune, which is now yours.
00:55:04Entire fortune from a cowboy actor?
00:55:07It must be that easy.
00:55:08They already spent their entire life savings on this clown show.
00:55:11They've got nothing left.
00:55:13Lysander, I really don't care for any of us.
00:55:15Look, I know.
00:55:17I know that you are the farthest thing from a material woman, okay?
00:55:21Which is exactly why, well, my third gift is, um, well.
00:55:46You found my dog.
00:55:51Trixie, I'm just a man, but with you it's so much more.
00:55:55Trixie Amore.
00:56:00Will you marry me?
00:56:03You know I can't say no to this doggo.
00:56:09Yes, I will marry you.
00:56:27Go, go, power couple.
00:56:31Okay, stop.
00:56:32The only power couple here is Butch and I.
00:56:36Let's remind everyone how worthless Trixie is.
00:56:40No man in their right mind would marry that embarrassing sack of scraps.
00:56:46Hey.
00:56:47I don't care if she's homeless or not, but I'm making this woman my wife,
00:56:50which means that she will be treated as and cherished as the most precious woman on earth.
00:56:56Understand?
00:57:00You still don't realize that my brother is the most powerful man on earth.
00:57:05This is General Lysander Armstrong.
00:57:15As if, like the almighty General Lysander Armstrong would propose to a homeless prostitute like Trixie.
00:57:22Yes, the Armstrong family basically controlled the global stock market.
00:57:26Lysander Armstrong would sooner marry the princess of England than someone from the lowest rank of society.
00:57:32I bet my life you're all just actors.
00:57:35Then you better enjoy your last breath.
00:57:37Come on, Lysander, what are we waiting for?
00:57:38Let's show them what we can do and get revenge for Trixie.
00:57:40What can a bunch of piss poor people do to us, the elites?
00:57:44Infect us with your poor people bad luck?
00:57:46She wishes she could blame her low status on bad luck.
00:57:50Truth is, she's just a useless, lazy bitchin' bum.
00:57:54She's utterly unmarriable.
00:57:58I can dispose of them in other means if you don't prefer violence.
00:58:03I'd handle them myself, but...
00:58:06I'll let you do all the heavy lifting.
00:58:09Go ahead, Lysander.
00:58:17Yes, hello, this is Lysander.
00:58:18Please bankrupt Marissa Wickham for me.
00:58:22Oh my gosh, I'm so scared!
00:58:24Anyone these days could call anyone and pretend to be on the phone.
00:58:35Uh, hello?
00:58:36Yes.
00:58:39What?!
00:58:44I'm going bankrupt!
00:58:54Hey, hey, hey, are you sure that was the call, Sasu?
00:58:58That was a real call?
00:58:59People don't just suddenly go bankrupt like that.
00:59:01My company's dead!
00:59:02It evaporated!
00:59:04It's the thin air!
00:59:08That's impossible!
00:59:10Who are you?
00:59:11What did you do?
00:59:13Secretary Cho, you said you're the Secretary of Health, right?
00:59:16And you yourself said that the Armstrong family owns the entire global stock market.
00:59:20Could that be how they bankrupted Miss Wickham?
00:59:23Then that means...
00:59:26You're really Lysander Armstrong, the richest and most powerful man in the country.
00:59:33Trixie's marrying the famed war hero, the man every girl wants and every man wants to be.
00:59:41Now you believe me?
00:59:42Those who do bad will always end up losing everything.
00:59:45No, there's got to be some trick to this.
00:59:48You guys are just bums trying to extort money from us.
00:59:51Sasu, Sasu, Sasu.
00:59:53Please, Sasu.
01:00:00I know why you're all over Trixie.
01:00:02Because you've been in the military for so long, you don't know what a real woman can do for you.
01:00:07Let me take you to my wedding chamber and I'll show you a good time.
01:00:12Either rub your hands for me, or I'll have them removed for you.
01:00:20I would never be interested in a woman who's as vile and cruel and wicked as you are.
01:00:26Guess the cheater gets cheated on eventually.
01:00:31Sasu was just trying to save the company.
01:00:34I don't blame her at all.
01:00:35Your double standards are incredible.
01:00:37Okay, you don't want me, fine, but there's plenty of other efficiency.
01:00:41I can give you a room full of pageant winners, 18 years old, fresh for the taking.
01:00:54I did that so you wouldn't have to, Miss Trixie.
01:00:57Thank you, Devon.
01:00:59Marissa, not only have you backstabbed me, your best friend, by stealing my fiance,
01:01:06but now you'd sell out other innocent girls just to get your company back?
01:01:09You're an insult to all good women out there.
01:01:12No, to all of humanity.
01:01:13So now, everything that I've ever given you to, I'm taking it all back.
01:01:21Wait, everyone, stop.
01:01:25They're imposters.
01:01:30I just got off the phone with the president and she said your contract is not getting canceled
01:01:34because it was assigned by the goddess healer herself.
01:01:37So we won't go bankrupt?
01:01:40The goddess healer?
01:01:41You mean the eccentric and highly elusive sage in the field of medicine approved of my biomedical products?
01:01:47Yes, that's the highest honor anyone can have in the field of health and medicine.
01:01:51The goddess healer's motto is the right rewrites the wrong, the left leave the wrong bereft.
01:01:58That means she's rewarding me.
01:02:00The president would never let your company go bankrupt.
01:02:03In fact, she's on her way now.
01:02:07So you're telling me this dashingly handsome motherfucker over here isn't Lysander Armstrong?
01:02:14Who the fuck cares who he is?
01:02:15If the president and the goddess healer approves of my products,
01:02:19who cares about this washed up war hero?
01:02:21We can break his legs, break his arms, no one would even bat an eye.
01:02:24She even gave us explicit permission to call upon secret services.
01:02:28FBI!
01:02:29FBI!
01:02:31FBI!
01:02:31You're under arrest for fraudulent claims and identity theft.
01:02:36Gotcha.
01:02:41Guess I still get the last laugh, Trixie.
01:02:43No, don't arrest her.
01:02:46Trixie is a good person.
01:02:48Please officer, don't arrest her.
01:02:50Grandma, Mr. Rogers, Mrs. Williams, what are you all doing here?
01:02:54The neighbors heard about the breakup between you and Butch.
01:02:57We were worried, so we came here to back you up.
01:03:00Listen officer, I can attest that Trixie Amoria is a good neighbor.
01:03:05She's very kind-hearted and would never break the law.
01:03:08Yes, and one time when my daughter needed university tuition, Trixie gave her everything
01:03:13she had just to help her out.
01:03:15She also paid for my recent heart surgery as well.
01:03:18My fiance really is an incredible woman.
01:03:21She's an angel descended from heaven.
01:03:28You must be the criminal pretending to be General Lysander Armstrong.
01:03:32My brother is not a criminal.
01:03:34He's a war hero who single-handedly saved this country from a terrorist attack.
01:03:38Without him, this whole country would have been bombed to ash.
01:03:41And that's why his choice to crime is stealing his identity.
01:03:45General Lysander Armstrong only fell into a coma because of the fight with the terrorists.
01:03:49And we've received no word that he's woken up yet, so this must be an imposter.
01:03:54I can tell that this whole dilemma with my identity is causing you a lot of trouble.
01:03:58I promise I'll get it resolved and we can focus on taking down your scumbag ex.
01:04:04If you want to arrest me, fine.
01:04:07But don't fuck with my fiance.
01:04:09You don't get to decide, punk.
01:04:10Let's go!
01:04:34Get him!
01:04:35If you can.
01:04:37Go!
01:04:56If you are out there!
01:04:58Let's go!
01:04:58Hell!
01:05:26Is that enough pain?
01:05:28Or do you want more?
01:05:37Legend is written all over you, Leicenander.
01:05:42Grandma, meet my new fiancé.
01:05:48Wow, your new fiancé.
01:05:50He's so manly.
01:05:52Much better than your last one.
01:05:54I always knew you'd find someone better.
01:05:56It's Butch's loss.
01:05:58Trixie has always been so much better than Marissa.
01:06:02She's like a shining star in the sky and Marissa's like a roach in the sewers.
01:06:07Bitch, we name calling now?
01:06:09I'll drown you out with insults from my side, right fam?
01:06:11Drown out the poor!
01:06:13Drown out the poor!
01:06:20See Trixie?
01:06:21You've got no connections, no power.
01:06:24You can't compete against me even if you have one guy on your side who can fight.
01:06:28We're too honorable to fight dirty like you.
01:06:30So you're using defenseless lives as your shield because you know we won't hurt them.
01:06:35Let them eat cake!
01:06:46You can't shoot all of them.
01:06:47Grab what you can, fam.
01:06:49Attack!
01:07:06You will not hurt a single soul in my presence.
01:07:15What the fuck was that?
01:07:17I don't care what the fuck it was!
01:07:18I'm not letting her make a fool of me at my own wedding!
01:07:28Damn it!
01:07:29Damn it!
01:07:30Damn it!
01:07:30Damn it!
01:07:32You forgot I had a gun too?
01:07:35That'll teach you from messing with the Wighams.
01:07:37Take Miss Trixie and her family and get out of here.
01:07:39We're cornered.
01:07:40I'll sacrifice myself to fend them off.
01:07:42Devin, you and your brother are both good men.
01:07:45I will not let your injury be in vain.
01:07:48They will be punished.
01:07:52now hold still for me right rewrites the world
01:08:08holy fuck did she just reverse the bullet by chanting the goddess healer's chant
01:08:13she the goddess healer i'm all better now thank you miss jixie see i knew that you were no ordinary
01:08:25woman no please i am just an ordinary girl don't put me on some sort of pedestal sure
01:08:32you hear that she's just some average homeless girl in the streets she was probably holding
01:08:37out a super magnet that drew out the bullet well i do not care for glory i do believe in
01:08:42justice
01:08:43marissa and butch not only have you betrayed me but now you've hurt the innocent too
01:08:48i will make you both pay for your crimes and who are you to judge me for what i do
01:08:54god wrong but you're close oh bullshit i'm gonna show you how the elite can travel any low lives
01:09:04you want to cross the line so bad then let's see you try
01:09:07charge
01:09:17the hell is this this is the line between life and death yeah was that extra neon spray paint
01:09:26i'll admit it looks pretty good but uh i'll die before i believe that's magic
01:09:31you're not the grim reaper what if it's a trap that woman has many tricks up her sleeves we ain't
01:09:36afraid of her she's nothing but a circus prostitute why don't you cross the line and see for yourself
01:09:43i will
01:09:47left leaves the wrong rest
01:09:56i'm fine nothing happens you'll see soon enough oh please i really want to die and you call this the
01:10:04line between life and death i knew you were just making that shit up whoops just crossed it again
01:10:09whoops and again nothing's happy
01:10:27what did you do to my brother i didn't do anything your brother just didn't want to heed my warning
01:10:33i suggest you take him to the ur if you don't want your wedding to become his funeral
01:10:39come on major are you not going to help your own brother
01:10:43how was he able to cross the line see this must be an illusion
01:10:50only the pure of heart can cross the line
01:10:52will somebody take my brother to the hospital please
01:11:02you're so sore i wouldn't marry you you'd go and hurt my brother
01:11:05oh please you hurt us first
01:11:08at first i was really hurt by your betrayal
01:11:11but i've come to realize your true colors are that of a snake and a coward
01:11:15marissa thanks for taking this low life from me
01:11:20you blame yourself for being worthless you think anyone would want to marry you when you got
01:11:25nothing to offer
01:11:28when you wear odd and crazy clothes all day
01:11:34don't touch my wife
01:11:37and instead trixie gets a handsome and protective husband
01:11:42you can daydream all you want now trixie but when the presidential contract arrives
01:11:47it'll hit you like a fucking truck
01:11:49that you're nothing but an ugly phony
01:11:51and i'm the queen of everything
01:11:52oh really
01:11:54then let me show you how it is i who has everything you want
01:11:57you've got nothing on me
01:12:02yes
01:12:03tell the president to get here immediately
01:12:10goddess
01:12:10madame president i require your assistance
01:12:14yes we'll be there immediately
01:12:19get the vp we're leaving now
01:12:23did she just pretend to call the first woman president of the united states
01:12:28god i knew you were cheap but i didn't know you were crazy too
01:12:31i'm so glad i dumped you for marissa
01:12:34you're pathetic trixie
01:12:35a secretary to remind everyone how i have the presidential contract coming
01:12:39miss wickham is correct i was on the phone with the president earlier
01:12:43only the most important people have madame president's direct line
01:12:46you hear that everyone there is no way
01:12:50low-life trixie could have called the president by herself
01:12:54she's just a desperate phony who doesn't get enough male attention
01:12:58so she's come here to play up her importance
01:13:00no my granddaughter would never do that
01:13:02reversing time just to heal someone's wound
01:13:06only the goddess healer can do that
01:13:08is trixie really the goddess healer
01:13:18first your boy toy actor pretends to be the war hero general lysander armstrong
01:13:23and now you trixie are pretending to be the goddess healer who gave me my presidential contract
01:13:27is this how the working class think all the time
01:13:31i never realized how delusional they were
01:13:34you can only dream of what you can never have
01:13:37while we rub our riches and privilege in their faces
01:13:40look i don't know what circus school you went to
01:13:43but you trying to make me jealous trixie
01:13:45it ain't working
01:13:46you can't just fake the
01:13:50yeah but goddess healing power is legendary
01:13:53it's like real magic
01:13:54trixie you're an angel
01:13:57but the goddess healing is beyond your imagination
01:14:00and if we steal her identity just to punish her ex
01:14:03won't her followers be furious and riot against you
01:14:08no
01:14:09trixie look
01:14:11i believe you
01:14:12you saved me
01:14:14whether you're a goddess or not
01:14:16you did that
01:14:17no matter what happens you are a goddess to me
01:14:21we'll riot against you now
01:14:23tear her apart
01:14:24tear her apart
01:14:26tear her apart
01:14:27tear her apart
01:14:29tear her apart
01:14:30tear her apart
01:14:31tear her apart
01:14:31tear her apart
01:14:31tear her apart
01:14:31tear her apart
01:14:32tear her apart
01:14:32tear her apart
01:14:33tear her apart
01:14:36tear her apart
01:14:37tear her apart
01:14:37tear her apart
01:14:38tear her apart
01:14:39tear her apart
01:14:39tear her apart
01:14:41tear her apart
01:14:42tear her apart
01:14:42tear her apart
01:14:43tear her apart
01:14:54tear her apart
01:14:56wait what he's actually general lysander armstrong no no we've been through this already once okay
01:15:04right secretary chill this actor trixie hired pulled this weird stunt to try to bankrupt me
01:15:11but you already confirmed with madame president that i got the contract coming still right yes
01:15:16we all thought he was a fraud what i mean is you're the war hero general lysander armstrong
01:15:24and how dare you crash miss wickham's wedding the moment you wake up you fall under this vixen spell
01:15:31and now you're attacking one of the most important allies to the president he is the general oh but
01:15:38he's in trouble now did you hear that even the vice president knows me as an important ally to
01:15:44the nation's leader so what if trixie picked up some washed up war hero we got the vp and the
01:15:50president
01:15:50on our side you'll always be nothing trixie i told you now punish them vice president langley this is
01:15:59treason lysander armstrong you are stripped from your military honors and titles
01:16:08hurry the goddess healer needs us you can't do that mr vice president my brother is a war hero he
01:16:17single-handedly saved this country from terrorist attack he was in a coma for two years if it wasn't
01:16:22for miss trixie he would enough you speak another word and i will bring down your entire family
01:16:28not just your brother never it's okay mr vice president i've already given my life once for
01:16:35my country i have no problem doing that again if it means protecting my fiance's life
01:16:40and let's be honest about one other thing mr vice president i never gave a
01:16:44about any damn titles i truly saved a good man
01:16:56i will not let you bring ruin to my fiance and what can you do about it oh mr vice
01:17:02president i have
01:17:03swell idea my biomedical company invented the latest line of poison darts for the military
01:17:08let's try it out on them hold on mr vice president there's no way that you're taking this seriously
01:17:15put innocent civilian lives in danger despicable what's more despicable is that you and your
01:17:20filthy companions are disrespecting power miss wickham you can use full force on them did you hear that
01:17:42boys
01:17:42shoot wait that's the president
01:17:50what
01:18:05oh my gosh i'm so sorry madam president that was they were totally aiming for uh trixie the the fraud
01:18:13in the
01:18:13middle what is this oh that's my new biomedical weapon madam for your military this is a war crime these
01:18:21are
01:18:21innocent civilian lives you're messing with you're the uncivilized buffoon i can shoot whoever
01:18:26i want i have the presidential contract with great power comes great responsibility and this is the
01:18:31kind of dastardly creation you've made with the contract i gave you what are you doing reverse the
01:18:36poison and take it out of the present before it's too late that is easy there's no need i'll save
01:18:43everyone
01:18:57it's raining gold
01:19:00what's happening trixie doesn't have that kind of money it's got to be cheap glitter
01:19:07she she is she is a criminal don't worry madam president we will arrest her and we'll throw her
01:19:14in prison i'd be quiet if i were you because you're the one that will be going to prison once
01:19:19everyone
01:19:19is healed up what are you talking about the president literally came here to give me my billion dollar
01:19:32contract this contract yeah yes thank you first gentlemen
01:19:57my contract you bitch and that's not all
01:20:12this foul weapon will not see the light of day there is only a need for a vaccine if there
01:20:17is a virus
01:20:18don't you realize or are you too much of a goody two shoes to understand that
01:20:23you're the real virus here marissa money is worth more to you than human lives
01:20:28and that's something i cannot tolerate so prepare yourself because i'm about to smite you
01:20:35what are you gonna do the president is here and i just invented the best biomedical products in the
01:20:43world you'll pardon me for that little mishap right madam president you've recovered now
01:20:49so what's your final decision i'll she's gonna give me my billion dollar
01:21:02i'll smack her until she sees 50 stars
01:21:09why why are you attacking me madam president you're supposed to be giving me the billion dollar
01:21:14you wish you idiot
01:21:18i've never seen a woman so vile so ugly on the inside it makes me want to vomit
01:21:23i i don't understand i was just trying to punish these imposters for posing as the goddess of healing
01:21:30and do you know the goddess healer saved me and my son during childbirth you've really seen the
01:21:38goddess healer herself in the flesh the one and only and it's
01:21:46her
01:22:03welcome goddess
01:22:09Yes.
01:22:15You really are the goddess of healing, aren't you?
01:22:18How else did you think I saved you?
01:22:20Then why did you keep it a secret for so long?
01:22:25I wanted to walk the earth as a normal person.
01:22:28Help those in need.
01:22:30And make sure the man I chose loved me for me.
01:22:33No, so that means the billion dollar contract,
01:22:37it was you who gave it to me?
01:22:39She took it away just like that.
01:22:42That was our golden ticket.
01:22:44You were once my fiancé and best friend.
01:22:46But after everything you've done,
01:22:48we're officially getting ties with you both.
01:22:51No, please, I swear. I didn't know you were an actual saint.
01:22:57It doesn't matter who she is.
01:22:59Trixie has a heart of gold.
01:23:00She's an amazing person.
01:23:02And you ruined that the moment that you betrayed her.
01:23:05She's gonna be my wife.
01:23:07Because she is the most beautiful and amazing woman on this planet.
01:23:16I love you.
01:23:22To do v.
01:23:28For theireth of a yearly temple
01:23:29On that planet.
01:23:30All of her goals...
01:23:31All of her clothes
01:23:32... that could've been mine.
01:23:35this is all your fault you seduced me you were the one that came on to me you
01:23:42you himbo please Tracy give me another chance I want to be rich again I'll be
01:23:50your slave kiss the ground you walk on you've had your chance to apologize but
01:23:56it's too late now all I see is your greed and how much you'd hurt others just
01:24:00to benefit yourself you two should be locked up and she shall for creating
01:24:06illegal weapons of mass destruction arrest Marissa and Butch Wickham it's all
01:24:12your fault Marissa I never loved you it's your fault I was only with you for your money
01:24:17I didn't care you were rich I'll see myself now rest assured goddess we will not be using these
01:24:26biomedical weapons my platform is spreading kindness just like you I knew
01:24:31you'd uphold our shared values that is why I saved you with these healing hands I will
01:24:38work tirelessly to change the world one good deed at a time well let's not let
01:24:44this wedding go to waste wait we just got married right now do you take each other to be your
01:24:59lawfully
01:25:00wedded partner I do I do you may kiss the bride
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