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Short filmTranscript
00:15Oh, fuck.
00:16Okay, time to go.
00:18What is this? It's 6 a.m. Oh my God, baby. It's too early.
00:21First of all, let me be very clear. I am not your baby.
00:25Second of all, get out of my house before I call security.
00:28Are you crazy?
00:28No, just very busy.
00:32You are seriously kicking me out after all the fun we had last night.
00:37Last night was fun for you. For me, not so much.
00:41Time to go.
00:42Rapido, rapido. Let's keep going. Keep it going.
00:46Hey, listen. Don't you know who my father is?
00:49You can't have had it all. I'll be treating you like a queen by now.
00:52That is quite the offer for a one-night stand.
00:54You listen to me. No man in their right mind would ever, but not ever, marry you. Do you understand?
01:00You're going to die alone, you heartless fucking cow.
01:04Well, lucky for me, I would rather die than get married. To you or to anyone. Goodbye.
01:12My shoes are still there.
01:15Fuck.
01:19You're so naughty.
01:21Oh, listen. I gotta go out there.
01:22I love you too.
01:24Well, you look happy this morning, Brian. Did your boss die or something?
01:28I don't think Satan can die.
01:31But it's promotion day, baby.
01:33I don't know how you do it.
01:35Honestly, you just have to know how to handle a filly like her.
01:38Jenna's tough. I'd rather work for Jenna than anyone else at the company.
01:41Even when she is being a co-
01:42A new script came in. I need you to redo the whole thing.
01:49Right.
01:51Bigwigs are waiting for you in the conference room.
01:53This is it.
01:55I've worked my ass off for this.
01:57And what a fine job you've done.
02:02I know that shit-eating grin. What do you want?
02:05It's promotion day.
02:06For you and me. I'm just dreaming of my new window office.
02:10Ooh, out of the question.
02:12What? Oh, no, no, no, no, no.
02:13I have done everything you've asked for three years.
02:16You made a deal with me when I took this job.
02:18I stayed with you and put it with all of your-
02:20Look, Brian. I am the boss.
02:23You are the glorified secretary.
02:25I decide who gets what around here.
02:28You jump when I say jump.
02:29You bow down when I say so.
02:32Got it?
02:33Yeah.
02:34So, on your knees.
02:47That's a good boy.
02:54Don't say shit.
02:57Hi.
02:58Huh.
03:01Jenna, we've had our eye on you.
03:03And we'd like you to be the next CEO.
03:07However, there is one little snag.
03:11For you to be our CEO, you're going to have to be married.
03:15Huh?
03:16That cold-hearted bitch.
03:18No promotion, huh?
03:19That's it. I'm going to quit.
03:21I'm going to go in there and tell it right to her sadistic fucking face.
03:27I'm sorry.
03:28You're saying my options are I get married in a week or I forfeit the CEO position?
03:36Where is this coming from?
03:37Shareholders.
03:41You know my son, Devin.
03:43He's our newest board member as of this morning.
03:46We know it sounds a little backward.
03:49Shareholders expect traditional family values.
03:53As a single woman, you're just too intimidating for these guys.
03:58Jenna, we need to talk.
04:01All right?
04:03I can't hold an enemy longer.
04:04Me neither.
04:05Surprise!
04:07We're engaged.
04:17We're engaged.
04:21Oh.
04:25Yep.
04:26Engaged.
04:28Brian.
04:30Seriously?
04:32It's been three years.
04:34Arnhem.
04:35Brian Arnhem.
04:35My assistant and the love of long life.
04:40Oh.
04:40Right.
04:41Is this true?
04:44Of course it is.
04:46Jenna King is my kind, sweet, loving, Beyoncé.
05:00What do you say to her?
05:02It's all settled then.
05:04We'll get the paperwork made up immediately.
05:07Next week after the wedding, we'll make it official.
05:09Of course.
05:11Engaged means we'll be getting married next week.
05:16It's different when you say, like...
05:19Congratulations.
05:21Congratulations.
05:22See you at the wedding.
05:26You're going down, Kate.
05:27Not if things went the way they did last night.
05:39What the fuck?
05:41I know.
05:42What the fuck?
05:43I know.
05:45Look, they weren't going to give me the position unless I...
05:48said that I was married.
05:50I panicked.
05:51Oh.
05:52Well, you can keep panicking.
05:53Because we are not getting married.
05:55I came in here to tell you that I quit.
05:57What?
05:58And that you're a selfish asshole.
06:04Okay, that sounded a lot more harsh out loud.
06:06What are you going to do about it, huh?
06:09Fire me?
06:10You are selfish, Jenna.
06:12Yeah, but so are you, Brian.
06:14Oh?
06:15What do you want?
06:17I want a raise.
06:20Fine.
06:21No, no, no.
06:21I want a promotion, then the raise.
06:23This is not a fucking magic lamp, Brian.
06:25Oh, well, then I'll just tell them you lied.
06:26Oh, Devin!
06:27No, no, no, no, no.
06:28Okay, fine.
06:28Fine.
06:28You can have a raise.
06:31And promotion.
06:31And your promotion.
06:33Yeah.
06:35I didn't know you were so annoying.
06:37Oh.
06:38Well.
06:39I certainly knew you were.
06:42You're engaged?
06:44How could you?
06:47What are you doing?
06:51Penny.
06:55How?
06:57How?
06:59It's not like you would tell your ex-girlfriend that you're even seeing someone?
07:03What?
07:04Betrayal.
07:05Tasha, come on.
07:07We went out for one drink.
07:09And then we slept together for months.
07:13Don't you?
07:15Oh, don't touch me.
07:16No, no.
07:16Oh.
07:18As an inter-office relationship, you both are subjected for an HR interview.
07:23Answers to this interview are considered on the record and result in considerable fines
07:28if found to falsely represent the relationship.
07:31Okay, that doesn't sound legal.
07:33I don't make the rules, Mr. Arnum.
07:35But I do.
07:38Isn't that funny?
07:41As you know, it's a very powerful company.
07:44Which means that if we ever find out that this engagement of yours is a sham, not only
07:49will you lose the CEO position, but we will ruin you.
07:55Legal or not.
07:58Right.
07:59Question number one.
08:01When was the first time you two were intimate?
08:07Oh, you owe me a big time.
08:11It was, uh, after the Poulsen style party.
08:15Yeah.
08:16Ms. King, uh, Jenna invited me as her plus one.
08:22Clark, honey, you said you would do it.
08:25No, I don't want to.
08:26Stop.
08:37And, uh, we shared a very, very special night.
08:42What?
08:44Please just stop.
08:46What are you doing?
08:47No, I'm not.
08:48Come on.
08:49I'm not.
08:50Okay.
08:51Come on, show me.
08:51What do you got?
08:52Best move.
08:53Step touch.
08:55Okay.
08:56Okay.
08:56Okay.
08:56Okay.
08:59Come on.
09:00Um, a little bit.
09:09Can I kiss you?
09:11Such a gentleman.
09:14Time to go.
09:22Thanks, bud.
09:24Let's go.
09:25Let's go.
09:29Yep.
09:30That was the first time we were intimate, charming.
09:34Moving on.
09:36What is Jenna's favorite underwear?
09:39This is ridiculous.
09:40Send her procedure.
09:42Yeah.
09:42But if you don't want to go through it, I'm more than happy to tell the board that you were
09:47receiving the offer of CEO.
09:49Black lace.
09:52From Agent Lace.
09:54Collab with Lovely Design.
09:55Is it also standard procedure to, uh, have her strip right here to prove it?
10:00He's so funny.
10:01He's so funny.
10:04Favorite movie?
10:05Speed 2.
10:07Favorite flower?
10:08Peonies, especially when they're not in season.
10:15Well, you two seem to know a lot about each other, right?
10:18But, Brian, did you happen to know that your fiancé here, she was cheating on you last night?
10:25With me.
10:30Yeah, well, we, uh, had a sort of last hurrah moment, and, uh, honestly, I'm just surprised
10:38that she spent her last hurrah slumming it with you.
10:44You two better watch her back because I'm coming for you, and I'll expose you, and then
10:50I'll ruin you both.
10:53Good luck.
10:56That was brutal.
11:06I can't believe you slept with that guy.
11:09You're one to talk.
11:10Touche.
11:12He's right, though.
11:16If we're gonna do this, we need to really commit.
11:20You need to move in.
11:21Tonight.
11:24Here.
11:25Take my card.
11:26I'll cover any moving expenses.
11:29Look, this isn't ideal for me, either.
11:32Believe me.
11:33But we need to make it at least look like we're on a united front.
11:41By the way, how did you do that?
11:42Know all the answers to the questions?
11:44It's like you were living in my brain.
11:47Jenna.
11:48It's literally my job to know and anticipate everything about you.
11:52Well, it's creepy.
11:54Hey, just be glad they didn't ask anything about me.
11:57What is that supposed to mean?
11:59You know absolutely nothing about me.
12:02That is incredibly untrue.
12:04Where am I from?
12:05A farm?
12:07Mm-hmm.
12:09Ville?
12:10Nice.
12:11How old am I?
12:13Hopefully over 18, am I right?
12:16I'm turning 30 on Sunday.
12:17Really?
12:1830?
12:18And you're still an assistant?
12:22My bad.
12:23Uh, I will take you out for a nice dinner.
12:28Sunday is the day that we're getting married.
12:30Right.
12:32Ranger?
12:35Well, this is serious, Jenna.
12:39All right, it's probably fun for you fucking around with finance bros, but this could ruin
12:45us.
12:46You might be fine, but I could lose everything.
12:49I'm out on a limb for you.
12:51I know.
12:52I know I'm asking a lot of you, but I swear I will make it up to you.
12:57Starting today.
13:03I'll clean it off my ass.
13:11That's right, mother.
13:12Fuck!
13:17No fucking way.
13:19Welcome home, sweetheart.
13:22What did you do?
13:23You told me I needed to move in, so I moved in.
13:26It's like a fucking manosphere threw up on my house.
13:31Our house.
13:33You know, I'm starting to agree with Devin.
13:35This place could use a bit more of a masculine touch, bro.
13:39Mm-mm.
13:40Oh, and here, these receipts are for you.
13:43Get your feet off the designer chair.
13:46Were you raised in a barn?
13:48No.
13:49The farmhouse next to the barn.
13:57Two.
14:00God, I love that.
14:06Is this a fucking water bed?
14:07You know, my landlord would never let me have it.
14:09Where is the $3,000 California king I had custom made?
14:13Hmm?
14:14Oh, right.
14:15Um, in the alley, being used by a wino as a toilet.
14:18Hey.
14:20Don't worry about it.
14:23Oh, come on.
14:24Now we can sleep all close and snuggly.
14:26Very cute.
14:27Now I can see that you're pleased with yourself, torturing me.
14:30Oh, I thought you'd like it.
14:31I don't let anyone sleep with me.
14:34Not even hookups.
14:35Hmm.
14:36This is supposed to be my space away from people.
14:40My sanctuary.
14:42Our sanctuary.
14:42Finish that word.
14:45I will smother you with a pillow.
14:52If this is going to work, there are going to be certain rules that we both need to agree to.
14:58A contract.
14:59Hmm.
15:00Got it?
15:01I'm keeping the bed.
15:03Keep the bed.
15:04I will sleep in the guest room.
15:09What does our engagement contract say about consummating the marriage?
15:13Don't.
15:14Take that as a no.
15:16Okay.
15:17Engagement contract.
15:18Here are the terms.
15:21Sleeping quarters will be separate.
15:25Next, add physical affection only when required.
15:30Like, in public.
15:32Nothing gratuitous.
15:34Gratuitous?
15:42You mean...
15:44Think this.
15:50Yeah, I'll try to control myself.
15:58Good.
16:00Nothing gratuitous.
16:02No dating or hooking up until the CEO paperwork is signed.
16:05And my promotion paperwork.
16:08Whatever.
16:09And...
16:10Full and total verbal commitment to each other.
16:12Blah, blah, blah.
16:13I get to pick the wedding DJ.
16:14No.
16:15No DJ.
16:16This is going to be a good old-fashioned courthouse shotgun wedding.
16:20Except I am not pregnant.
16:21Just when I thought you couldn't get any less fun.
16:23Where do I sign?
16:25We, Jenna King and Brian Arnhem, enter into this agreement of engagement willingly and of our own volition.
16:32What? Were you like a lawyer or something?
16:35Used to be.
16:39What?
16:39I practiced before I joined Purple Rabbit.
16:41But now...
16:43Now...
16:44Sign there.
16:52Great.
16:57Great.
17:07Hey, Jenna, it's alright. These are my parents. Mary and Cody.
17:12Your parents? Your parents? And you must be Jenna.
17:17It's so nice to meet you.
17:20Appreciate y'all having us.
17:22Right. Mom, Dad, what are y'all doing here?
17:27You said you couldn't make it home for your big birthday weekend because of work, so surprise, we came to
17:33you.
17:33We went by your old place, but your roomie said you were here.
17:36And that you were getting married.
17:39Right, yeah, we almost forgot.
17:42We're engaged.
17:43We want to hear all about the engagement after we unpack.
17:47After you what?
17:50Right. Lovely.
17:52Are you guys sure you wouldn't be more comfortable in, like, a hotel or something?
17:57Jenna, they'll stay in the guest room.
17:59Family stays with family.
18:01And hey, you're family now, Jema.
18:04Jenna.
18:05Plus, we want to get to know the gal that stole Bright's heart so suddenly.
18:09Right.
18:09So, how long are you guys staying?
18:12We just wanted to stay for the big birthday weekend.
18:15But now that you two are engaged, we've got weeks of planning to do.
18:22Weeks.
18:24Weeks.
18:25Weeks.
18:26Really?
18:27We will be married and divorced by then.
18:29Why didn't you tell them that we're getting married next week?
18:32Come on.
18:33A courthouse wedding would devastate my mother.
18:35She's so excited about this.
18:36Just play along for a few days until I find a time to tell her.
18:40Fine.
18:41But remember when I said I don't like people invading my privacy?
18:44Well, yeah, I was going to ask you about that.
18:46Are you just afraid of people knowing the real you, or is it more of a preservation thing?
18:49Stop guessing about my neuroses.
18:53I wouldn't have to guess if you'd just trust me.
18:59I do trust you.
19:02Obviously.
19:03No.
19:04You trust me with your schedule and your dry cleaning.
19:06Or I know almost everything about you.
19:11You know nothing about me.
19:16Am I wrong?
19:20I'll sleep on the floor.
19:21Uh-uh.
19:23I am just as stubborn as you.
19:25And twice the gentleman.
19:27You're on the bed.
19:32Eatin' out Jiggy Juggly Jelly on a plate.
19:36Eatin' out Jiggy Juggly on a plate.
19:39Eatin' out Jiggy Juggly Jelly on a plate.
19:43Eatin' out Jiggy Juggly on a plate.
19:45Hello?
19:45I can't wait.
19:46You're my appetizer.
19:49Buffet feast.
19:50You're my appetizer.
19:52Buffet freaks.
19:54When I come out to the spot.
19:55Got me cooking on heat.
19:57I'm an apple.
19:58Ties up.
20:00Buffet feast.
20:06Joining me?
20:12You know, for somebody who loves their privacy, you sure hate knocking.
20:16Could you just put some clothes on, please?
20:19This is incredibly inappropriate.
20:21What did you say, boss?
20:23Ah, yes.
20:24Speaking of, do your parents know who I am?
20:26What do you mean?
20:28Do they know I'm your boss?
20:29Probably not.
20:31You know, usually I just refer to you by one of my pet names.
20:35What pet names?
20:38Satan.
20:39Satan's mistress.
20:40Devil incarnate.
20:42The dark princess of the underworld.
20:44Mainly just variations on the same theme.
20:46Unbelievable.
20:49Truly.
20:52I don't think this will fit.
20:55I don't think it's a good idea for me to play hooky from work right now.
20:58You know, important business things and assistant.
21:00You could be sick one day.
21:01That witch doesn't deserve you.
21:03Right, Jenna?
21:05I'm sure that witch could do a day without you.
21:09Could she?
21:10It's not like she has anything hugely important going on.
21:15Okay, we'll have fun.
21:17Aren't you coming?
21:18Didn't you say you were between jobs?
21:20I did say that.
21:22Mm-hmm.
21:23Good.
21:24So what do you have in mind?
21:27There's a lookout at the top of the mountain!
21:29Come on, slowpokes!
21:31Sightseeing is very different than hiking, Brian.
21:34I don't know.
21:34Oh, God.
21:36Oh.
21:38I...
21:40Oh, God.
21:45I just...
21:46I just need to say...
21:48Oh, hey, hey, hey.
21:56Okay.
21:58So, more of an inside, girly.
22:00Noted.
22:01I run every morning.
22:03Right.
22:05Cut, like, on a treadmill, like a civilized person.
22:11This is my nightmare.
22:14What?
22:15Well, all of this.
22:17Strangers in my home.
22:18Hugging me.
22:20A wedding!
22:21A wedding!
22:22Oh, my God.
22:23The thought of a poofy white dress
22:27literally makes me want to puke.
22:33Well, if it's any consolation, I really do appreciate you being here.
22:36You know, it means so much to my parents to be here with me, and they are psyched about you.
22:43Family is everything.
22:45Family is overrated.
22:47Oh, speaking of, I did invite your parents to the wedding.
22:51What?
22:53Just kidding.
22:55Sort of.
22:57I know family's not really your thing, but I did make a few fake invitations and left them on my
23:01desk.
23:02And just to really sell it, I just went to Mr. and Mrs. King.
23:08Is this fun for you?
23:10Terrorizing me?
23:11Oh, immensely.
23:13What do you do for fun?
23:14Besides feast on the unborn?
23:16Um, close the red floor stories deal.
23:19Um, review development slates, sign paychecks, manage schedules, order coffee.
23:24Work, work, work.
23:26You know, there is such a thing as work-life balance, right?
23:29That is the funniest thing I have ever heard.
23:31Do you think I like being this way?
23:34I have been there since I graduated, and I still have to work twice as hard for them to take
23:38me seriously.
23:41You're right.
23:42What?
23:43It must suck.
23:46You are the most talented producer they have, by far.
23:50And it must suck to have to prove yourself time and time again.
23:53Oh, God, especially when idiots like Devin just prance on in because they have a dick.
24:00Granted, I assume it's a pretty small, oddly-shaped dick.
24:04Yeah.
24:05But you do deserve better.
24:14Okay.
24:15Now on to the top.
24:17Buttercup, buttercup.
24:25Ma, here, I know how much you love your chocolate chips.
24:28Oh, thank you, dear.
24:31I sure do love my chocolate chip cookies.
24:34Jenna, that salad looks delicious.
24:37Well, yeah, it's a chopped salad.
24:40Are you kidding me?
24:42That's not just any chopped salad.
24:43That's the chopped salad.
24:44Extra chopped, no basil, no spices.
24:46Just the way she likes it.
24:47Wow.
24:48You're going to make a great husband, Bri.
24:53Right, yes.
24:55Thank you, babe.
24:57Right.
25:03Oh, you don't have to be shy in front of us, kids.
25:05You know, when your father proposed, he couldn't keep his hands off me.
25:09Still can't keep me.
25:10Oh, stop it.
25:12No, please, God, no.
25:13You won't horn them.
25:14Please don't.
25:15Yeah, that's right.
25:18Hey, you know, the old ball and chain.
25:23I am not old.
25:25Oh, well, you certainly act a lot older than you are then.
25:30Yeah?
25:31Yeah.
25:31At least I don't act like a frat boy.
25:33Right.
25:34Right.
25:34Right.
25:35Right.
25:43Oh, my.
26:02Anybody want a drink?
26:03I know I do.
26:08Right.
26:11Oh, pull yourself together, man.
26:13It's a contract.
26:14Strictly professional.
26:16Right.
26:18Hi.
26:19Do you have anything stronger than coffee?
26:24So, Jenna, tell us what you have planned.
26:28For what?
26:29Oh, a movie, probably.
26:33No, silly.
26:34The wedding.
26:35You are a hoot.
26:38Yeah, probably just something simple like a courthouse.
26:43Probably next week.
26:45Oh, a good old-fashioned shotgun courthouse wedding.
26:49Exactly.
26:50Except I'm not pregnant.
26:52No.
26:54No, you can't be getting married in some dusty old courthouse.
26:57Sweetie, last minute we can work with, but this is going to be your wedding day.
27:02It's fine.
27:03Don't worry, Jenna B.
27:04I will help you every step of the way.
27:07We'll start today.
27:09Ah, I'm actually...
27:10Oh.
27:12What did I miss?
27:13We are going wedding dress shopping.
27:18She loves dresses, especially wedding dresses.
27:21There's bourbon in here.
27:22Drink.
27:28Isn't everything just so beautiful?
27:31Don't you just love, love?
27:34Uh-huh.
27:37Is something the matter?
27:42Maybe this is also complicated.
27:45Oh, sweetheart.
27:47I'm not going to lie to you.
27:48Marriage is complicated.
27:51If you follow your heart, you always end up in the right place.
27:54And I could see how good and big your heart is, Jenna.
27:58I don't know about that.
28:00It is.
28:01You got to believe it.
28:06Showtime!
28:10Hit me back.
28:12Never make it.
28:13Tell me something.
28:15You better not share.
28:17You're killing it ambitious.
28:19But fall to the fever.
28:22Think and wait back to us.
28:23We promised to be able.
28:25So never give in to our natural emotions.
28:29Oh, keep in your head that you know the right thing.
28:31To survive
28:33Never give in to a natural emotion
28:37Keep in your head
28:38But you know that it just takes some time
28:44Just takes time
28:47Just takes time
29:02I think you found the one
29:11Jenna, you feeling okay?
29:13You're looking a little pale
29:15Yeah, yeah
29:15I'm just a hike and champagne
29:19Dancing
29:25I think I'm going to faint
29:27Jenna
29:28You okay?
29:34Yeah
29:35Yeah, I'm good
29:36I'm good
29:36I'm good
29:37You look beautiful
29:40Oh no
29:46You should be fine
29:48Take her home
29:50Here, come on
29:52I'm going to get you some rest
29:57You know, you weren't kidding
29:58When you said wedding dresses really disagreed with you
30:01Not the time, Bri
30:02I don't even know what happened
30:05Oh, I talked to the doctor
30:07He said you just had too much fun
30:09A little bit of rest
30:11And you'll be right back on your feet
30:13Oh God, look on
30:17Here
30:20You can have my
30:22Special blanket
30:23Yeah, there you go
30:26Some water over here if you need it to
30:28Your mom's really sweet, by the way
30:30Your whole family is
30:33I'll see where you get it
30:36Was that a compliment?
30:38Maybe we should take you to the ER
30:40Don't stop
30:41Don't make me laugh
30:43At my weekend's tape
30:44Sorry, sorry
30:48I don't think anyone's ever actually taken care of me before
30:51Really?
30:52But you make it so easy
30:58My parents never really cared about me like that
31:01It's like their careers and lives were so much more important than me
31:04Growing up, I was a parent
31:08And I think I just started
31:11Seeing and believing, really
31:13That showing vulnerability was a weakness
31:17Yeah
31:17Well, that sounds pretty hard
31:19Made me a good producer
31:21But a bad partner, I think
31:23You're not a bad anything, Jenna
31:26We're all humans
31:28Just
31:30Trying our best
31:33Except Devin
31:34Oh, yeah
31:35Except Devin
31:36Fuck that guy
31:36Fuck that guy
31:39Okay
31:43Fuck Devin
31:44Yeah, fuck Devin
31:45Fuck that guy
32:00Fuck that guy
32:00Fuck that guy
32:01Fuck that guy
32:03Fuck that guy
32:04Fuck that guy
32:04Fuck that guy
32:04Fuck that guy
32:05Fuck that guy
32:05Fuck that guy
32:06Fuck that guy
32:09Fuck that guy
32:22hi
32:23good morning
32:26I'm really glad you didn't turn into a pumpkin last night
32:30or whatever they have in hell
32:31right
32:33cause I'm the devil
32:40um
32:42thank you
32:45it was really sweet of you to take care of me
32:48what
32:50are you still sick
32:53do you have a fever or something
32:54I
32:57it feels really nice
33:09are you feeling okay
33:18I gotta go
33:20gotta go to work
33:28bye
33:34oh my god
33:36I love Brian
33:45wow
33:49I really have no friends to talk to
33:51maybe Brian was right about this whole work-life balance
33:56oh shit my meeting
33:57okay that is a problem for future Jenna
34:00just get it together babe
34:01and stop talking to yourself
34:03starting now
34:08okay
34:11so with the new script changes
34:12I wish Brian was here
34:16uh schedule changes
34:18I can't believe she slept with my husband
34:20did I just say husband
34:23you seem a little distracted Jenna
34:26no
34:26not a good look for the next CEO
34:29no no everything everything is good
34:31everything is great
34:32let's just pick this up after the wedding
34:34you seem to have a lot on your mind right now
34:40yeah
34:42tick tock
34:44tick tock
34:45it all falls down
34:49it's two different nursery rhymes you moron
34:52did you just call me a moron
35:01I'm just gonna
35:03tell him that I have real feelings
35:04and
35:05be over the thing straight
35:09Jenna
35:10I met your new neighbor
35:18Clark
35:21long time no see Jenna
35:23oh
35:24you two know each other
35:26I'll start dinner so you can catch up
35:28Brian will be home soon
35:30who
35:31uh Brian
35:32he's
35:34he'll be home soon
35:35okay
35:37so what are you doing here
35:38funny enough just moved in
35:40down the street
35:42why
35:43you hate this neighborhood
35:44things change
35:46people change
35:48look I'm not the man who I once was
35:50okay
35:51I'm not the one who let you get away
35:58what we had
36:00that was special
36:01you can't deny that
36:02I
36:02I don't know what to say
36:04say it's not too late
36:06is it
36:09right
36:14I'm engaged
36:15didn't answer my question
36:16you
36:16left me
36:18you broke my heart
36:19you don't know how sorry I am
36:21truly
36:21I wasn't ready then
36:23but
36:23I am now
36:24okay
36:25I'll prove it to you
36:27I don't have time for this
36:29do you love him
36:30if you do just
36:32tell me
36:32I'll leave you alone for good
36:34oh you've got to be kidding me
36:39Clark
36:39would you like to join us for dinner
36:42um
36:44no no
36:44sure
36:46great
36:51come on
36:51dad if you don't mind
36:52oh
36:53sure
36:54yeah
36:56here you go pal
36:58thanks for coming
37:00yeah
37:00appreciate it
37:01look at this
37:01all right
37:03let's
37:04okay
37:04oh
37:06nice
37:07comfy
37:08yeah
37:08that's about right
37:12Craig could you pass the wine
37:18Brian did you pass the wine
37:27I'll do it myself
37:31Clark said you two go way back
37:33yeah I knew gin before all sass no frass
37:38I rather like strong independent gin
37:42sass and all
37:43well
37:44any jenna's better than no jenna
37:47right
37:49uh
37:50jenna
37:51uh
37:51any wedding
37:52progress today
37:54oh no
37:55we're still
37:56planning
37:57I thought you hated
37:58planning weddings
37:59people change
38:01right
38:25I know you and Clark
38:27dated
38:29but
38:31were you ever in love with him
38:35we were engaged
38:47glad to see you're still running
38:49mind if I join
38:56may I
39:03there
39:04all right
39:10come on
39:25well hey it was great uh catching up jen
39:30what's up brian
39:33what's up
39:39do you mean breakfast
39:43I did
39:45that plate's for you
39:47although
39:47I see you are yay
39:48got a little
39:49something left
39:51he is harmless
39:52brian
39:53really
39:55right
39:56we're gonna be late to meet my parents
39:59you should put a shirt on
40:10oh my god
40:11it's so good
40:12you like this
40:12it's delicious
40:13and
40:14very good
40:20here
40:21right guy
40:22keep jenna's in with us
40:25here you go
40:26sweetie
40:30if it isn't the happiest couple ever
40:37that's a spirit
40:43these are the board members of my company
40:46the big day is almost here
40:47are you getting excited
40:48over the moon
40:49I just have to figure out
40:51how to smuggle a wedding cake
40:52into a courthouse
40:54no you can't get married to the courthouse
40:57devon
40:58call the staff
40:59tell them to prepare the house for a wedding this sunday
41:02no
41:04can we at least offer you some cake
41:06well
41:07oh no no
41:08he's probably really busy
41:10very important
41:11lots of meetings going on
41:12no
41:12usually
41:13very
41:15I need you to meet me at the cafe right now
41:20how are you guys doing
41:21oh my god
41:22come right on in
41:23oh
41:23really good
41:24you know what I just realized
41:26we haven't heard the proposal story yet
41:28it must be amazing huh
41:29so good
41:30please tell us about it
41:32it was actually
41:34it's a really funny story
41:35really
41:35um
41:36Clark
41:41Clark
41:42Clark
41:44I thought your name was Brian
41:50why don't you join us
41:52we're just hearing about the proposal story
41:54what if I do
41:55go on Jenna
42:01it was our anniversary
42:04and um
42:07he wrote me a poem
42:10it was so sweet
42:13and masculine
42:14and harsh
42:16and then he took me to a poetry reading
42:20I didn't know you liked poetry son
42:22I don't
42:23but apparently Jenna does
42:25you know
42:25ode to a fancy urn is my favorite
42:29go on babe
42:30why don't you
42:30tell the rest
42:32fine
42:33I will
42:35and then he cried
42:37and he cried
42:38and he cried
42:39and then he got down on one knee
42:40and he proposed
42:41yeah well that's not exactly how I remember it
42:43fine
42:43then you tell them
42:49pre-wedding ditters
42:53what the hell are you doing
42:54besides single-handedly keeping up this narrative
42:56no I mean turning into an unrecognizable puddle
42:59the moment
42:59Clark walks into the room
43:00what are you talking about
43:01oh you know exactly what I'm talking about
43:03are you jealous
43:04no
43:05this is a contract marriage
43:06okay so then what is it
43:07you're putting us both in jeopardy
43:09all right
43:09do I need to remind you
43:10that I have real stakes in this
43:12my family
43:12I'm lying to them
43:13okay well I'm sorry
43:14if I don't know what you're into
43:15maybe you like poetry
43:16I don't know
43:17anything
43:18about me
43:20that is not fair
43:22it is not my job
43:23to know things about you
43:24you're right
43:26but you never tried to either
43:41came to check on you
43:42I'm fine
43:43couldn't sleep
43:44I know you Jen
43:46you're not okay
43:48it's just this whole wedding thing
43:51and Brian
43:52drives me nuts
43:54he does seem a little uh
43:55high strung
43:57yeah it's
43:57yes
43:58he's always like doing things for me
44:00not like
44:00not like in a patronizing way
44:02and like
44:03supportive way
44:04and he's
44:05ambitious
44:06and smart
44:07which is annoying
44:10and he listens to me
44:11which is
44:12so
44:14weird
44:14Jen
44:14I can't stop thinking about you
44:18can I kiss you
44:27I'm marrying Brian in two days
44:29look
44:29I messed up
44:30I can see that now
44:31but
44:32if you have an ounce
44:33of feeling the way
44:34I feel about you
44:35then
44:36you should be mine
44:38I want to marry you
44:39what
44:42I thought you said
44:43marriage was a loss
44:44of independence
44:45it's worth it
44:46to be with a person
44:47you love
44:50yeah
44:52are you right
44:58hey
44:59think about it
45:08did you buy it
45:09every word
45:11sweet
45:13very sweet
45:16just play the part
45:18until she falls for you
45:19and break it off
45:20with that loser Brian
45:21then you're gonna be free
45:22to leave her again
45:23and I'll get you
45:24the rest of your money
45:25you got it
45:26I'm so glad you're again
45:27win-win for me
45:28I get paid
45:29I might get some tail
45:30in the meantime
45:31I kind of forgot
45:32how hot she is
45:33I like you Clark
45:37hey hey hey
45:39you need to talk
45:42I need your help
45:44to teach someone a lesson
45:48like a team
45:50you're a team
45:59I thought you said
46:00you hated hiking
46:03well like you said
46:04people change
46:05glad you called this morning
46:07look I like Bri
46:09but no one
46:10makes me feel
46:11the way you do
46:23God I've missed you
46:29can we baby
46:31here
46:31hey
46:32I am all yours
46:34yeah
46:35do whatever you want
46:36what about Brian
46:37what about Brian
46:45I don't have to
46:45take my shoes
46:46and socks off
46:47right babe
46:47I mean
46:47there's pokey stuff
46:49everywhere
46:49that actually depends
46:51on if you want to
46:52hike down fully
46:53nude or not
46:57I think I'm gonna puke
46:59I think I'm gonna puke
47:01oh god
47:02I know this is part
47:03of the plan
47:03but watching that
47:04was truly sickening
47:05oh well at least
47:05you don't have
47:05his tongue in your mouth
47:07whoa whoa whoa
47:08what's going on
47:10we need to talk
47:11there is nothing
47:13between me and Clark
47:14there was at one time
47:16but that is over
47:18I am marrying you
47:22go to bed
47:26every time you come
47:27into my life
47:27you fuck it up
47:29you're the reason
47:30I didn't want to get married
47:31you are a pathetic
47:34impotent excuse
47:35for a man
47:37even if I hadn't
47:38seen this video
47:39of you and your
47:40little dirtbag boyfriend
47:41this morning
47:42I knew you were
47:43up to something
47:44so I strung you along
47:45until I could figure
47:46it all out
47:48thank you for coming
47:49to Jenny King's TED Talk
47:50Kobe
47:51oh no no
47:51oh come on
47:53oh
47:55that's far
47:56thanks for doing this
47:57have a nice hike down
47:59douchebag
47:59rotten hell
48:01bye
48:08oh dear
48:09you look beautiful
48:11thank you
48:12I want you to meet
48:13grandma Sandra
48:14she has something
48:15special for you
48:16grandma
48:18welcome to the family
48:21we want you to have this
48:23oh
48:24I
48:24really
48:25oh yes
48:27absolutely
48:28yes yes
48:28we insist
48:29it's an Arnhem
48:31family heirloom
48:32and we want you to know
48:34every time you look at it
48:36that you belong
48:38farming
48:39fun
48:40family
48:42family
48:42family
48:57hey now
48:58I told Jen all this already
49:01but I got the whole CEO paperwork right here
49:04now
49:05during the wedding ceremony
49:06you're going to sign the marriage certificate
49:08but you'll also sign this
49:10make it all official
49:12welcome to married life son
49:14alright
49:18that's your last chance bro
49:21I know it's all lies
49:22lies
49:23lies
49:25I'm going to make a deal
49:26for both of us
49:27so we can get what we want
49:28if you owe Jenna
49:30I'll promote you
49:32to her job
49:33and I'll pay you
49:34three times
49:35the raise
49:36but
49:36if you go up
49:37and sign that deal
49:39I'm going to make good
49:41on my promise
49:41to ruin both of you
49:42my offer stands
49:43for five more seconds
49:45five
49:47four
49:48three
49:50two
49:52you know what
49:53you're right
49:54you are
49:55very consistent
49:57consistently
49:57the biggest
49:59D-bag
50:00I have ever seen
50:02enjoy
50:02having Jenna
50:04as your new CEO
50:05bye
50:13thank you
50:14thank you
50:14sorry
50:15I
50:43I''ve like to see you
51:17It, uh, looks like our pan's gonna go off without a hitch.
51:22You sure about this?
51:27Stop the wedding!
51:32Oh, my God.
51:33Oh, my God.
51:41This marriage is a sham.
51:45As you can see in this contract right here, dated a week ago.
51:50I told you you shouldn't have given it.
51:51About the time, Bri.
51:52They have deceived this company.
51:54And they have deceived all of you, ladies and gentlemen.
51:57Oh, my God.
52:00What's he talking about?
52:01I'm very glad you asked.
52:03In order to get promoted, Jenna, right here, forced her assistant, Brian, to marry her.
52:15Is this true, Jenna?
52:28You know, you would have made a really shitty lawyer.
52:32What?
52:33Look at the bottom of that page.
52:37I didn't sign that.
52:40You can wave that piece of paper around all you want.
52:44It's not gonna do anything for you.
52:46Because I made a promise to Jenna that I would marry her.
52:50And that's exactly what I'm gonna do.
52:52You didn't sign the contract?
52:54Nope.
52:57So you did all of this because you're a good person.
53:06I'm sorry.
53:07I can't do this.
53:09What?
53:12You have given me so much.
53:14What are you doing?
53:15You've given me years of your life.
53:17I threatened to ruin your career.
53:20I forced you to lie to everyone.
53:23I forced you to pretend to be in love with me.
53:26You don't have to do this.
53:27You've got to stop.
53:28I'm sorry you ever met me.
53:32I don't have to do this.
53:34Wait.
53:37Just let me go.
53:39Kiss me.
53:45I don't deserve this.
53:47No.
53:48I don't deserve to be a part of your family.
53:51You don't get to decide this.
54:05I guess she did all the dirty work to ruin both of you.
54:12That's why you'll never be CEO.
54:15What?
54:15Devin, you are an embarrassment to this company and to our family.
54:21If you insist on acting like a child, you are going to be treated as one.
54:26Go to your room and stay there.
54:29Please.
54:30Daddy, I can explain.
54:32Please.
54:43So how you doing, son?
54:45Pretty shitty, Dad.
54:49I'm sorry I lied to y'all.
54:51You do what you have to do for true love.
54:54Including never giving up.
55:01Everyone can go home.
55:02It's over.
55:03She's gone.
55:07It's not over, Brian.
55:10Go find her.
55:12So what are you waiting for, son?
55:14I'm sorry.
55:30Jenna, it's me.
55:35I know you're in there.
55:49Can I come in?
55:50I don't deserve this.
55:54Not after everything I've done.
55:58But you don't love me.
56:01This was all fake.
56:03I don't think you can fake the kind of connection we have.
56:06Do you?
56:08Why are you doing this?
56:10You don't need me.
56:12They offered you my position.
56:14Jenna, I quit.
56:17You what?
56:22Why?
56:24Devin offered you the position.
56:25That's your dream job.
56:27Why would you do that?
56:28I don't want to be anywhere you're not.
56:30Brian, I...
56:30Look, I know what you're going to say, okay?
56:33Because I know you better than anyone else.
56:38And I also know that I love you.
56:50And I have loved you from the day that I met you, Jenna Kane.
56:56And even when I've hated you, which I have many, many times,
57:03I've still always been head over heels in love with you.
57:08So, what do you say?
57:10No contracts, no professional strings attached.
57:22Will you marry me?
57:24For real?
57:28I love you, Brian.
57:42Brian, do you take Jenna to be your lawful wedded wife?
57:46So this is what you wanted?
57:48Do you get married tonight?
57:49I do.
57:52I don't want to spend another birthday without you.
57:55And Jenna?
57:5782.
57:58You may now kiss your bride.
58:27Put the script in Cayman's hands.
58:29See if he likes it.
58:30Okay, oh.
58:31Hi.
58:33Oh, hey, could you get me a coffee?
58:34What happened to our new assistant?
58:35Amy's out there at the desk.
58:36Uh, Amy, could you grab us two lattes?
58:38Sure thing, boss.
58:40I'm the really tall guy.
58:42Yeah.
58:44Yeah.
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