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00:00Demeter Chastises Persephone by Captain Falcon Punch
00:05Persephone was coming home. That was all that mattered. The months since her daughter was
00:10abducted to the underworld had felt like millennia. In her rage, she could easily have killed Hades,
00:17if she got her hands on him. Hades was immortal, but she could still cut him into pieces,
00:23like Kronos had done to all his children before his son Zeus defeated him.
00:27Maybe she would steal a leaf from Zeus's book and chain Hades to a cliff and let a hawk tear
00:32out
00:32his favorite organs every day. Prometheus had been suffering that fate until just recently when
00:38Hercules rescued him. In her anguish, Demeter had neglected to do her duties as goddess of plant
00:45life and the harvest. The result was famine for the Greek mortals, who got to share Demeter's misery.
00:51Demeter had told the other gods that she was so distraught over loss,
00:55she simply overlooked little things like the mortals. She had realized, though, with a conniving smile,
01:02that this famine would be an excellent way to get Zeus' attention. Zeus had been unwilling to cross
01:08his brother Hades, and even more hesitant to enrage his belligerent wife. Persephone was the child of
01:15an illegitimate relationship between Demeter and Zeus, and Hera always henpecked Zeus whenever he tried
01:20to help out his former lovers or bastard children. Once his mortal worshippers started dying of
01:26starvation, however, Zeus suddenly became more eager to help Demeter rescue her daughter.
01:32Zeus had sent a messenger, a Scalophus, to order Hades to release the girl he kidnapped,
01:38and Demeter could see him returning now, guiding Persephone out of the underworld.
01:43Demeter ran to her daughter, and when they embraced, flowers burst from the ground in full bloom,
01:48and a young willow tree sprang out of the ground, covered in white blossoms. Persephone returned
01:54the embrace warmly, but Demeter could sense that her daughter was tense. Surely, her traumatic
02:00experience in Hades could explain this, right? What's the matter, dear? Did that brute Hades hurt you?
02:08Actually, answered Persephone, who though over one hundred years old, was still a teenager among
02:14the gods. Mr. Hades was quite a gentleman. She blushed a bit as she remembered all the
02:20attentions Hades showed her, then quickly tried to say something to keep her mother from suspecting
02:25she had developed a crush on her kidnapper. Maybe he was a bit cold, and there's that little thing
02:30about tormenting mortal souls for all eternity, but he was always perfectly pleasant towards me.
02:36Demeter clicked her tongue in disapproval.
02:38Tsk, tsk, you just forget about that awful man. You'll never be seeing him again.
02:44Ascalifus started coughing into his fist.
02:47Actually, mom.
02:49He interrupted in his dry voice.
02:51Don't shoot the messenger, but Persephone sort of ate four pomegranate seeds right before I picked
02:57her up.
02:58The thing about Greek gods is they had character flaws, and one of those flaws was they liked to
03:03shoot the messenger. Bam? Demeter turned Ascalifus into an owl, and he fluttered away, hooting.
03:10And that's an end of his part in this tale. Persephone looked aghast.
03:16Mom? Why did you do that? He just told you the truth.
03:20For months, Demeter had gone between grieving over her loss and raging like a mother tiger
03:25whose cub was threatened. Some of that pent-up maternal instinct was flaring up right now.
03:30You ate food in the underworld. Do you have any idea what that means? Those who eat or drink in
03:38the underworld are never allowed to leave.
03:40Mom? It was just four pomegranate seeds, said Persephone, giving her mother one of those
03:47condescending you-don't-know-what-you're-talking-about looks.
03:50The last time Persephone saw her mom like this is when Orpheus was in concert and all the teenage
03:55goddesses were going. Persephone ended up sneaking out, and her mother erupted like Pompey. Demeter's
04:02temper had caused the global ice caps to melt a bit. All the Greek mortals had been sure it was
04:08a
04:08man-caused disaster. Persephone decided to calm her mother down with some common sense,
04:14Socratic logic.
04:15If that were true, I couldn't possibly be standing here, could I?
04:19Demeter, quickly growing impatient with her daughter's casual attitude towards this very
04:24serious situation, shot back.
04:27I don't know how you're standing here right now, but you never should have eaten anything
04:31that man offered you. Where is?
04:34Demeter looked around for the messenger, realized she had been too quick to transform him into an
04:39owl, and roared in rage. As she pulled out her cell phone, and dialed Zeus at Mount Olympus,
04:45the willow tree behind her started to smolder. It was a short conversation. Demeter could hear
04:51Hera throwing things at her husband at intervals. Zeus quickly explained that he had to strike a deal
04:57with his brother. Since Persephone ate food in the underworld, by law she should have been required
05:03to spend eternity there. However, since she ate four pomegranate seeds, he and Hades agreed that she
05:10could spend eight months of the year with her mother, but had to spend four months with Hades
05:15every year. Zeus quickly hung up before he had to deal with an enraged mother on the phone as well
05:21as his irate wife in person. The willow tree and every flower erupted in flame. As the ashes died
05:28down, Demeter put away her phone and glared at her daughter. You have to spend four months of the
05:34year, every year, in the underworld. Persephone seemed to recall Hades saying something like that
05:40before she left, but she didn't remember everything. She had been distracted by thinking about his manly
05:46voice and dignified black beard. Oh yeah, come to think of it. But I don't mind. It'll sort of be
05:54like summer camp, only during the whole winter. And don't you think I'll mind? Or can't you be
06:00bothered to stop and think about how your decisions affect anybody but you and your feelings? We're going
06:05to be separated for four months, every year, for eternity. I'll be with you for the other eight.
06:12That's twice the time I'll be spending with Mr. Hades. Persephone was hurt by her mother's reaction.
06:18Wasn't her mother just happy enough to see her, regardless of the circumstances? She wanted to
06:24retort by pointing out that if she and Hades got married, and have kids, two girls and one boy,
06:30Persephone had decided, how hard it was going to be to spend eight months of the year with her mother.
06:36But she thought it best to take it slow with the whole I have a crush on Hades thing,
06:40since her mother was probably a bit peeved at him still.
06:44That's not the point, young lady. I don't think you're understanding the problem here.
06:49I just endured the four worst months of my life. They would torment. They would torture.
06:55I felt like I would rather be immortal and die, so that I could at least join you in the
07:00underworld.
07:01Just as I finish the most traumatic experience of my life, and think it's behind me forever,
07:06you're telling me that I get to go through it all over again. Forever. How can you have such an
07:12ambivalent attitude? How could you let that rat trick you so easily? You were minutes away from
07:18escaping him forever. Don't tell me you couldn't wait that long to satisfy your appetite.
07:23Now, it was Persephone's turn to be irate. Adults spent so much time talking about not having a tone
07:31in your voice, no matter what you said. Well, Demeter was using a tone of voice that made
07:36Persephone feel terrible. Persephone wasn't a terribly selfish girl, no more so than most teenage
07:43goddesses, and really, could you blame a teenage goddess for thinking she was the center of the
07:48universe? Persephone genuinely felt sorry for her mother and had an idea of how painful an
07:54experience it must have been. She'd missed her mother too. But, hey, fact was fact. They couldn't
08:02change things now. And Persephone had been tortuously hungry. How was she to know she was
08:07almost free? Couldn't her mother at least look on the bright side of things? Persephone was now queen
08:14of the underworld. Before, she hadn't been queen of anything, which is hard for a teenage goddess.
08:21All the other students at Olympus High would poke fun at her for not being in charge of anything,
08:26calling her names like Phosphorus, and Phony Purse, and Cupid never helped her land any of the cute
08:32boys she liked. Now, Persephone had a position, a queen. She was in a serious relationship with one of
08:39the big three, Zeus, Poseidon, and Hades. All of this was going through Persephone's mind,
08:46and who could blame her if she didn't think, and reacted harshly to her mother's criticism.
08:51Maybe I'll go back there right now and eat the rest of the pomegranate, since you seem to think
08:56I'm such an idiot. The flames gave one last roar, and then died down, as Demeter tried to control
09:02herself. Persephone, I don't think you're an idiot. I never said you were. I need you to promise me.
09:09Right now, that you will never think of carrying out that childish threat.
09:14Persephone wasn't as quick to control her temper as her mother, and she sensed that she had pushed
09:19a button. How is it childish? Maybe I like Hades. Maybe I want to be his queen and have kids.
09:26Maybe you just need to deal with the fact that I'm growing up and eventually,
09:30I'll have to leave the nest. I'm old enough to make some of these decisions for myself.
09:35She declared proudly. Then she had a flashback. The last time she had said that was when her
09:41mother caught her returning from Morpheus concert, and at that time. No way. Her mother wouldn't do
09:48that. Would she? It was raining a bit, because of her mother's sadness. The tree life and foliage
09:55had grown back again. Not quite as fast as it had earlier, but still at a miraculous speed.
10:01There weren't any flames. Her mother wasn't mad at her. Persephone sighed in relief. She was safe.
10:09In actuality, Demeter was controlling her temper. It was her rule to never punish a child in anger,
10:16unlike that dreadful Aphrodite who had her son Cupid whipped mercilessly.
10:20The willow tree which had sprung up again aged, until it was fully grown.
10:25Last chance, baby. Promise me you'll never carry out that threat.
10:30Persephone didn't know what to say. She saw where this was going, but was too scared to think
10:36straight. She certainly did not want to be punished like a little girl only 100 years old.
10:42But she was also felt guilty over the mean things she had said. She just stood in silence.
10:48Holding her daughter's hands in hers, lovingly, Demeter sat down, her back resting against the
10:54old tree, and guided her daughter across her lap. A branch of the willow tree bent down and offered
11:00her a long, tough willow switch, perfect for her intent. She snapped it off, and in one motion,
11:07lifted her daughter's black toga up to her back and flicked the switch across her daughter's
11:11radiant backside. For human children, a spanking may only last a minute or two, but for God,
11:18it typically took days. Demeter applied the switch for about two hours, and by the end,
11:24her daughter's bottom was only slightly pink. Baby, you said some things which hurt me.
11:30Even if you don't say you're sorry, I want you to know you're forgiven for those things.
11:35I'm also sorry for losing my temper and saying things which hurt your feelings.
11:39But I am not a bit sorry I spanked you. Now, what do you have to say for yourself?
11:45I'm so sorry I was disrespectful, Mom, cried Persephone. And I'm sorry I threatened that I'd.
11:52I hated being away from you, and I'd never cut myself away from seeing you.
11:57I won't eat anything more in the underworld. You have my word.
12:01I trust you, Persephone, said her mother.
12:05Mom, are we done already?
12:07Have you learned your lesson?
12:09I think so but, I still feel terribly guilty.
12:13I just wanted you to give me your word. A little encouragement is all you needed.
12:18If you feel guilty about those disrespectful things you said, I can discipline you for each of those,
12:24or we can end it here. Tell me, Persephone, have you been punished enough?
12:29Persephone bit her lip. If she was honest with herself, Persephone knew her mother was letting her
12:35off easy. She hated being spanked, and she knew one word from her could end this. But she also knew
12:42that the only way to earn her mother's trust and respect was to be honest.
12:47No, Mom. I think I've earned a spanking to remember.
12:50Though it pained her to punish her daughter, Demeter smiled with pride.
12:54I couldn't agree more. She said with a sigh. With that, she began to apply the birch switch
13:01with increased vigor. After landing ten crisp strokes, Demeter began to lecture her daughter
13:06and punish her for each of her individual offenses. This is for leaving your chaperones and going off
13:13by yourself into the woods. I've explicitly told you not to do that in the past, but you deliberately
13:20disobeyed me. And that allowed you to be captured. Demeter added another fifty stinging blows to drive
13:27that first point home, for a goddess, though, that was more like getting five swats.
13:32And this
13:34is for accepting food from him.
13:39You should have known better than to give in to the man who abducted you.
13:42Demeter delivered one hundred smarting spanks with the willow branch,
13:46which had grown to the size of a small cane in her hand, and was sprouting leaves. Only now was
13:52Persephone beginning to show her discomfort by squirming and squeaking as she felt each tingling
13:57smack across her divine behind. This, Persephone, is for giving me that arrogant look just after we
14:03were reunited and for speaking to me in that presumptive tone of voice. Demeter paused a moment,
14:09the switch held high. For this one, she would have to see a few tears to know that Persephone was
14:15regretting her attitude. The willow branch thickened and aged in her hand, until it was the size of a
14:21sapling tree and as weighty as a walking stick. Persephone was growing curious about the delay and
14:27peeped over her shoulder. She wished she hadn't. The sound of the wood raining down on her glowing
14:33pink bum was louder now, but not as loud as her cries. After only fifty wallops, the first tears came,
14:40each one dripping down Persephone's cheek and bringing a flower to bloom where they landed.
14:45Demeter raised an eyebrow, noting her progress. The cane snapped after one hundred fifty wicked
14:52strokes. Demeter examined the broken branch, not quite snapped in two, amused.
14:58Perfect timing, she thought. She didn't have the heart to use such a large branch anymore,
15:04and it had lasted the exact number of strokes needed. However, she had promised Persephone to
15:10chastise her for each of her transgressions. Persephone felt guilty, and Demeter knew her
15:16daughter was expecting the full punishment. Demeter felt her resolve weakening a bit.
15:21Remembering Persephone's smart-alecky Socratic argument, Demeter steeled her voice and said,
15:27This is for doubting me when I told you that you shouldn't have eaten the food of the underworld,
15:32and talking back. Demeter raised her godly hand and this time delivered a hand spanking to her
15:37daughter's deep pink posterior. After fifty swats, Demeter felt her own palms stinging and the guilt
15:44held her back. Was this what her daughter was enduring? Breathing hard, Persephone looked over
15:50her shoulder and said wickedly, What's the matter, Mom? Is that all you got?
15:55Demeter's breast filled with mixed emotions, while she was annoyed with her daughter's flippancy,
16:00she was proud of Persephone's determination and strength. None too subtly, Persephone was telling
16:06her mother not to hold back. You are being disciplined, little lady. You ought to conduct
16:12yourself accordingly. Yours should be a state of contrition and penitence, not hubris. These next
16:19swats are just for your cheekiness during your chastisement. After this, we will return to your
16:24regular punishment. Demeter rained down one hundred sizzling spanks with her godly strength,
16:30causing the willow tree to sway from the force. Demeter raised her hand and the willow tree provided
16:36her with a whole bundle of birch switches, thorny and menacing. A vine shot out of the ground and
16:42knotted itself around the bundle, creating a perfect handle. Demeter snatched it and held down her
16:48daughter. It was time to finish this. This is for threatening to eat the rest of the pomegranate
17:03in the underworld. She punctuated her admonishment with three hundred exclamation points. One switch
17:12all by itself had been enough to bring the daughter to tears. The combined force of thirty nasty switches
17:18would leave welts on even a goddess's bottom that would not fade for weeks. Persephone wailed the whole
17:24time she was wailed. She didn't feel guilty anymore. Okay, mom, you can stop. It was lucky her mother was
17:33holding her down with all her godlike strength, because the girl was kicking and flailing by the
17:38time the uninterrupted wave of pain ended. Persephone tried unsuccessfully to catch her breath, then gasped.
17:45Sniff. Mom, ah have I been punished enough?
17:48I. Hick. It hurts. My ba. My ba. My bottom hurts so much.
17:56Wah. Ah ah ah ah ha ha. Demeter tried to catch her own breath. The sun was setting. They'd been
18:04at
18:04this for around six hours. But her daughter was old and strong-willed. This had still been nothing
18:10compared to a typical spanking for a young goddess. Persephone, don't you remember? You still made one
18:17other defiant retort. When you defended your poor decision by saying you were old enough to decide
18:22for yourself? Well, you may be getting older, but it does not logically follow that your decisions will
18:28be wise or right because you are older. Demeter could cite Socrates too if needed. You are 140 years
18:35old, but I will still not hesitate to take you over my knee if you make decisions that put yourself
18:40in
18:41peril. You are already a remarkably intelligent and resolute young goddess. And I have
18:46faith that you'll be capable of making wise decisions when you fully matured. And that's
18:51because you'll always remember that bad decisions will bring you pain. Pain much worse than any you'd
18:57ever be able to feel from a spanking. Mom, I sniff. I don't think I can take any more. I'm
19:04sorry.
19:04I'm so, so sorry. I know baby, but there's no point to a spanking if you're the one who gets
19:10to decide
19:11when it ends. Persephone's lip trembled, and the tears spilled anew from her wide,
19:16doe eyes. Her sentence had been pronounced, and Persephone, doomed to be spanked from dusk until
19:23the breaking of dawn, demurely submitted to her doom. Demeter cleaned off a few snapped twigs.
19:29Pointlessly, she patted her daughter's dark pink bottom to prepare her for the final ordeal.
19:34I love you mom, shouted Persephone, and began whimpering. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Once again,
19:43Demeter was taken aback by her daughter's will. Persephone heard her mother's voice say
19:48reassuringly. I love you too baby. When she felt the first smack, Persephone shouted. I'm sorry.
19:55Instead of crying. This continued for a couple of hours, her volume building until she was screeching.
20:02I am sorry. By three o'clock in the morning, Persephone's voice cracked and she went quiet.
20:08Too tired and physically drained to buck and squirm, she lay peacefully across her mother's lap.
20:14At four o'clock in the morning, Demeter saw that her daughter had actually fallen asleep on her lap,
20:20still fitfully twitching and reacting to her punishment which surely filled her dreams.
20:24Demeter spanked her snoozing daughter until six o'clock in the morning. Dawn broke, the bird sang,
20:30and Persephone's eyes may have flickered a bit before she dozed off again. With that, Demeter
20:37stopped the spanking. She realized the bundle she had been using for the birching must have broken
20:42apart during the night and she had gone to using her hand again without missing a beat. For the first
20:47time, she felt all the pain in her throbbing hand. Persephone slept soundly on top of her mother's lap.
20:54For a short time she rocked back and forth, moaning, clearly reacting to an imaginary spanking in her
21:01dreams. Then it stopped and she snoozed peacefully. By ten o'clock, Demeter decided her daughter was
21:08being too much of a sleepy head, and promptly woke her up with thirty brisk slaps. Still groggy,
21:14Persephone barely registered this wake-up call, but when her mother paused and added an extra twenty with
21:19extra strength, Persephone yelped and scrambled off her mother's lap. Owie! She growled rubbing her
21:26butt furiously. Demeter stood up to give her daughter a hug, but the girl beat her mother to
21:31the punch, surprising the old goddess by jumping onto her shoulders. With her divine strength,
21:37Demeter managed to keep from falling on her own butt, and carried her remarkably cheerful daughter
21:42back home. Now, you've all heard how during the four months of winter, Demeter is miserable and
21:48lonely. But spring comes every year when Demeter and Persephone are reunited. Now you also know why
21:55it rains all through April, and flowers bloom in May. Demeter still has to take her daughter over her
22:01knee from time to time, and it may last days, or weeks, or months, but their tears provide rain.
22:08Then, the spanking is over and they hug, and the flowers bloom. Then, the whole summer is blistering hot,
22:16and some might say that during the summer months, the sun in the sky is not actually Apollo. Actually,
22:23it's Persephone's well-spanked, red-hot bottom on display for the whole world to see.
22:28The End
22:29Thanks to Captain Falcon Punch for the story, and thank you for listening.
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