- 7 hours ago
The Young Offenders S05E04 [Full Movie] [Trending Drama]Full EP - Full
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00:02Whoever said that a week's work makes a man was obviously some rich prick.
00:06A week's work makes me a depressed man.
00:08He stinks of fish guts.
00:09Five, ten, two laurels.
00:13Fifty, twelve, fifty.
00:14Ten, fifteen, sixteen, sixteen, fifty. I'm done.
00:19Boy, we've been working all week, like.
00:21Stop giving away so much fish for free.
00:24No, boy. Then we'd just be as bad as the rich pricks.
00:26Yeah, that Bezos prick.
00:30I was running a drink.
00:31Yeah, please, thanks.
00:33No worries.
00:34Ma'am!
00:36Ma'am, we're toast. Do you need a drink?
00:39Any juice?
00:42Ma'raide!
00:44Ma'raide!
00:46Ma'raide!
00:47Ma'am!
00:48What's she doing, boy?
00:50It's the middle of the day and we want something.
00:52She's hardly dead, is she?
00:53No, if she was dead, she'd be haunting us by now.
00:56Ma'am!
00:57Ma'am!
00:58What the fuck?
00:59What's my name?
01:02What's that?
01:03What?
01:04What are you saying?
01:05Oak. Oak. Oak. Oak.
01:07What?
01:09What?
01:10Who?
01:11Who?
01:12Why?
01:13That stuff!
01:14That is disgusting!
01:16Dirty guys!
01:17Jesus Christ!
01:18The guards are coming!
01:19The guards are coming!
01:21Are you going to...
01:22Are you going to...
01:23Are you going to...
01:24Why are you...
01:24Why are you...
01:25Stop smiling, boys!
01:28Oh, Jesus Christ!
01:29It seems like everyone was added apart from us.
01:32Oh!
01:34Whoa.
01:36Why, how many times have you had the ride?
01:38Since we got out of prison?
01:39I...
01:40I don't know. Do hand jobs count?
01:41Depends on who gave them to you, like?
01:43I don't know.
01:44They were with my left hand, though. Some of them...
01:46Still doesn't count, boy.
01:47Yeah, I know.
01:48Then zero, for sure.
01:49I'm zero, too.
01:50Have you ever tried sitting on your hand and doing it?
01:52Oh, can't. We can't live like this, boy.
01:53Listen to yourself, all right?
01:55We are two of the biggest catches I know, boy.
01:57Women...
01:58Women should be throwing themselves at us, boy.
01:59I know.
02:00Can't. We have to. We have to.
02:01We have to go out in the pool, boy.
02:02Just all the apps are just full of cash.
02:03Oh, we don't need apps, boy.
02:04We're going to old school, okay?
02:06We're going to old school, all right?
02:07All right.
02:07Pubs, clubs, chippers, and schools.
02:11Yeah.
02:12Our schools?
02:12Yeah, mams only. Mams only.
02:14All right, but we can't just sit around and rot, okay?
02:17No.
02:17We're better than that, boy.
02:18I mean, we're lads.
02:19We're lads of cork.
02:21We don't just sit around and wait to get our holes away.
02:24We stand up, and we say enough is enough.
02:26Enough is enough.
02:27Now you look at me, boy.
02:29We are going out into that town,
02:30and we are not coming back until we have SDIs.
02:38Get changed.
02:40Yeah, we should probably get changed.
02:42Ice is made of fish.
02:43Yeah, we get changed, boy.
02:44Come on.
03:00What the fuck you doing, boy?
03:02Hold up.
03:06Hold up.
03:07Hold up.
03:09Hold up.
03:09Yeah.
03:11Hold up.
03:13Hold up.
03:14Hold up, hold up, hold up.
03:16Hold up.
03:17Hold up, hold up.
03:18Yeah.
03:20Yeah.
03:21Let me hit you with something.
03:24Something slow, something lovely.
03:26She likes the country, oh, she likes the country
03:30She don't like that fair shit that sucks
03:38Right, boy, it's all about the four C's, yeah?
03:42Confidence, compliments, and crack.
03:44Now, what's the fourth one?
03:46Yeah, no, I know, it's way.
03:47Obviously, the number one priority is that we get our hold.
03:50Yeah, well, like, you don't want to come on too strong, either.
03:52No, no, no, definitely don't come on too strong.
03:53But if we're smart, yeah, we can make a bit of kind, too.
03:57Oh, boy, I don't know if I get paid for troubling up giving it away for free, like.
04:00Hi, what did you say? Confidence, boy.
04:03Right, it's the summer, town's full of beers.
04:04All right, all we have to do is find two, two rich, two...
04:08Sorry, the fuck up, Cian.
04:10Find somewhere else to practice.
04:12Two rich, out of town beers, show them a good time,
04:15and then, you know, we steal a few things.
04:17So two lucky ladies will get their hold away
04:19with two of the best-looking lads in Cork.
04:20Nice, Conor and Jack.
04:21Then, in exchange, we take some jewellery that they don't even care about.
04:26What? So at the end, we ask them if they care about their jewellery?
04:29Oh, boy, no, right?
04:30Con, Con, we're on the bread line, all right?
04:32Yeah.
04:32Yeah, sure.
04:33It's annoying for them if they lose a sparkly piece of jewellery.
04:36But that sparkly piece of jewellery, boy,
04:38could rescue us from a lifetime of grief and poverty.
04:41All right, so we're stealing from them.
04:43Yeah.
04:43But in a good way.
04:44Exactly.
04:45All right.
04:45And anyway, they probably have, like, insurance, so everybody wins.
04:49Insurance?
04:50Yeah, like insurance, insurance.
04:53So when you pay someone money,
04:54then if anything happens to your stuff or your money,
04:57then that person has to pay you back.
04:58You're telling me some people are so rich
04:59that they pay someone else money just in case they lose their money
05:02just so they can get their original money back?
05:04Yeah, exactly.
05:05All right, boy, I'm gullible, but I'm not thick.
05:07No, but that is what it is.
05:09Pulling women can be complicated,
05:11but not if you use jock's easy-to-follow steps.
05:13He calls them the four Cs.
05:16Firstly, you compliment them.
05:18Secondly, you make them laugh.
05:19He calls that the crack.
05:23Third, you conquer them with confidence,
05:25ideally by demonstrating your brute masculinity.
05:29And if all else fails, which, of course, it rarely does,
05:32it's time for the mysterious fourth C.
05:35Linda once told me I looked mysterious when we first met.
05:38But the truth is,
05:40that look was me being so nervous I was trying not to get sick.
05:43My strategy is slightly different to jock's,
05:45but just as effective.
05:47What are you doing, boy? I'm not homeless.
05:50I find that just simply listening to what women have to say
05:53gets them in bed every time.
05:55What's even the point in having a boyfriend
05:56if he's not even going to talk to you?
05:58Sounds like he's just not very good at expressing his emotions.
06:01Just not my bed.
06:03Who have you got to communicate?
06:06I do love her.
06:08You think it might be good for her to know that?
06:20Good stuff.
06:21Have a good one, Ari.
06:22You know, boy, I think if those two work on their communication,
06:25they should be all right.
06:26Yeah.
06:27Why am I getting worried about you?
06:28I'm already after shifting three doors,
06:30and look, I've stolen five light doors.
06:32You know, boy, I've lost my spare.
06:34What?
06:34No, boy, you just have to get the first one out of the way, okay?
06:36It's like getting washed off the, like,
06:38I've got...
06:38Hey, hey, hey, hey!
06:40Hey!
06:41Hey!
06:42Put your fat in, you prick!
06:44Hey, hey!
06:45Are you all right, guys?
06:47Are you okay?
06:47No, we're not okay.
06:48We've just been mulled.
06:49No, no, you haven't.
06:49I stopped it.
06:50Look, I have everything.
06:51Yes.
06:51Yeah, yeah, yeah.
06:52You all right?
06:54You mean the boys?
06:55Well, you mean the boys?
06:55Is he speaking Gaelic?
06:56You know what?
06:57He's actually just worried that fine women such as yourselves
06:59are getting taken advantage of like that.
07:01I'm sorry about that.
07:02Yeah, terrible.
07:02Two of y'all is having a gas around the city.
07:04You got to see these alleyways, like, some savoury types.
07:07Oh, is that Gaelic?
07:08Yeah, that is Gaelic, yeah.
07:10So you wish, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
07:11Well, let us get you some drinks to repay you.
07:14Oh, a drink?
07:16Yeah, absolutely, that's unbelievable.
07:18Yeah, yeah, yeah, but it's worse out on us.
07:20Oh, are you sure?
07:21Yes, of course.
07:22You're not sure because if two women want to buy us a drink,
07:25that's it, they're body, they're tight.
07:26Yeah, sure, yeah, but no, no, no, we do insist.
07:28We do insist.
07:28I'm sorry about that.
07:29We'd love to.
07:30Well, we're not going to turn down a pre-drink.
07:32Yeah, why would you?
07:33Because you're not a fucking idiot.
07:36I'm Charlotte, by the way.
07:38She's an influencer, has over 100,000 followers.
07:41Charlotte, nice to meet you.
07:42My name's Jack.
07:43Emma.
07:44Emma, lovely to meet you, Emma.
07:46Beautiful, Emma.
07:47Whoa.
07:48How are you?
07:49Yeah, Connor, my sweetie.
07:50Oh, sorry.
07:51You smell really like fruit.
07:53Oh, yeah.
07:56After you, girls.
07:59What the fuck do you do?
08:00What are you doing, boy?
08:01We can't afford these drinks.
08:03Yeah, obviously not, boy.
08:04We're going to have to steal them.
08:05But look, we can't have them taking more grifters.
08:07All right?
08:07Yeah, all right.
08:08They're hot, rich and clueless, boy.
08:10It's perfect.
08:11Really?
08:12Yeah, boy.
08:13We're going to get our hole and make a mint.
08:14You watch?
08:15Me, you pervert.
08:16We don't want to watch.
08:18You didn't mean that, you fool.
08:20I'm not watching you and riding something.
08:23Boy, let's go get it.
08:25Girls, you head upstairs there and we'll get you a drink, all right?
08:28Perfect.
08:28All right, boy.
08:30It's easy to say.
08:32Here we go, this is the jackpot.
08:34Holy shit, boy.
08:37We're going to rob a plane.
08:39What?
08:40No, boy.
08:41I'm showing you how rich they are.
08:43All right.
08:44Shit.
08:48Me and Jock were Cork's most eligible bachelors.
08:51But love is not cheap.
08:53And the most expensive part is dating.
08:55And the most expensive part of that is drinking.
08:58Women love cocktails, especially the classy ones.
09:01And everyone knows cocktails are just a load of booze mixed together and given a fancy name.
09:05Three ladies.
09:07Hi.
09:07Here we are.
09:08This is another type of little mention.
09:10Three there you are.
09:12We'd assumed you'd done a runner.
09:14No, you're stuck with us now.
09:15Oh, we'll see about that.
09:17Yeah, cheers to muggers, eh?
09:19Cheers muggers.
09:20Cheers.
09:21Cheers.
09:24that is savage unbelievable yeah is that lipstick hey yes they're proud of the presentation yeah
09:31it's called a kiss from gawk so cute ah a kiss from gawk hopefully not the last
09:39oh my god is this a crack are we having a crack thank you garden welcome to the crack
09:54oh it's sort of beefy but in an amazing way yeah yeah would you boys be up for grabbing an
10:04early
10:04dinner after this oh absolutely yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah
10:20oh here we go here we go thanks thanks bye wait what are you what are you doing with that
10:28thing
10:28boy he's just burning the shit out of him why is this place so posh they just burn the food
10:32for
10:32the crack do they thank you where do you think you're right now pudding no we have to send that
10:38back the fellas after the burn at the top off the thing you're alive what you can't do no it's
10:44meant to be like that or or is this fire custard yes no we didn't see i usually we get
10:51it a rail
11:05oh my god oh my god man that's oh my god it's so hard and soft at the same time
11:12oh that's amazing
11:19oh
11:25so do you boys want to get the bill and then come back to us
11:29oh yeah yeah yeah yes please that sounds right yeah um we can we can do that and uh when
11:37we do
11:38that to them and we'll meet you outside thank you oh yeah oh wow look ah hey thank you i
11:45hope that
11:45tasted okay it was grand grand you're all yourself huh yeah yeah yeah we'll see you outside
11:55what are we gonna do we can't afford all this we don't know we got you to play what who's
12:00following
12:00you you just said we'll get this holy shit sorry boy all right no just look
12:22come on back
12:26come back
12:28i thought we were going to just lock the money and pay it for me
12:31i thought it was obvious we were taking the cash you made from us right right
12:35right here it is to get your butt back here goodbye
12:41i'm not gonna lie to harry we're not actually rich yeah no shit we're trying to show you a good
12:46time
12:46so we're making the most of it we ran out on the bill and whose cash is that
12:52i know i just borrowed it off some fella who doesn't know it yet so you stole it
12:55yeah we stole it we did steal it i'm not going to prison for some petty thief
13:00don't let a little bit of stealing get in the way of a good time
13:03this is so bloody authentic fine but if you steal anything from us i'll have you both arrested
13:10deal yeah deal deal
13:13can we get out of this pissy alleyway we can all go back to our hotel
13:18yeah everything yeah yeah all right
13:20no one minute no all right
13:35holy shit wait we need no cork at a palace
13:38are you seeing this guy
13:42are we lost gentlemen
13:44it's okay they're irish and they're with us
13:49yeah we're irish and we're with them
13:59yo the bed's so massive my feet don't even come off the end
14:03are you boys still sleeping in bunk beds then
14:05no what
14:07do you think con is all right he's been in there for a while
14:10should i go check on him
14:11you relax i i check on him all right
14:15hi hi hi please don't shit in here for you
14:19well we'll never get a whole of you sink up the place boy
14:21i said boy you know i only take a shit twice a week
14:23i'm loading up
14:26i'm already taking boy get your money squiket your money
14:28my shampoo
14:30body wash wait i've vanity it
14:32i've lost the conditioner
14:33all right i'll show you the other line now
14:35toothbrush
14:37so
14:38boy
14:39there is you tonight here
14:41a what
14:43What?
14:44Wee wee!
14:45Yeah, we're coming!
14:47Yeah.
14:50Do you order Chinese?
14:57Oh, Cang.
14:59Cang, you've got to do this, boy.
15:01I've never felt like anything like this in my life.
15:03No way, boy.
15:05I don't want to get my bits out.
15:08Boy, just cover yourself in the towel.
15:10I'm not doing it, all right, Jack?
15:15She's just wild about her.
15:17A girl made that nice before.
15:18I didn't even know they could.
15:20Is she okay?
15:22If you like, I can give you a nice pedicure.
15:24What'd you say?
15:26Pedicure.
15:26Right, I'm not into kids, okay, you sicko.
15:28Excuse me.
15:29Yo, what'd he say?
15:30He's not a sicko.
15:32Connor, a pedicure is getting your toenails trimmed.
15:36What?
15:37Rich people get other people to clip their toenails.
15:39Yeah.
15:44Sorry about earlier.
15:47It's okay.
15:49Out of interest, have you ever given a pedicure to a pedophile?
15:56There's something in my water.
15:58Oh, that's cucumber.
16:01Oh, I don't think we have that in Ireland.
16:04Geez, boy, I could get used to being rich.
16:06I think I'm gonna go take a dip in the jacuzzi.
16:10Are you coming?
16:21Oh, boy.
16:22Oh, boy, that's warm.
16:23That's nice, isn't it?
16:24Now, we're gonna get a photo of you.
16:25I'll go get my photo of you.
16:26Oh, no.
16:27Come on, just get in.
16:27No, I shouldn't have to do the pedigure.
16:29You're right.
16:30Oh, it's okay.
16:32Come on.
16:32Now, I'm just gonna stay here and look at the lovely view of Cox City.
16:35Oh.
16:36Don't worry.
16:37If you can't swim, it doesn't matter.
16:40It's not that deep.
16:41I can swim.
16:41You know, we can either swim.
16:43We can either swim.
16:43Come and just get in and stuff.
16:44It's weird.
16:45See some warm, mate.
16:46Yeah.
16:47See some warm.
16:48All right.
16:48Come on, honey.
16:52I don't want any of that.
16:55What are you missing, boy?
16:56What are you missing, boy?
16:56What are you missing, boy?
16:56All that.
16:58She was getting the big cup.
17:01What the fuck are you wearing, mate?
17:03What are you wearing?
17:04Don't get up, boy.
17:06What are those things, mate?
17:08Just tell me my hands.
17:10What are you wearing?
17:11Don't get up.
17:12What were they supposed to, all right?
17:13You didn't have any clean ones.
17:14I didn't know you'd be seeing them today.
17:15I don't want you having laughs.
17:16Come on, boy.
17:17Come on.
17:17Sorry.
17:17I think they're sweet.
17:20Really?
17:21Yeah.
17:21Get in.
17:23All right.
17:24Is it too hot?
17:25Is it hot?
17:25No, it's nice and warm, boy.
17:26Yes, boy.
17:28Very good.
17:29All right.
17:30Oh.
17:31Yeah, it's just time.
17:32It is actually quite hot.
17:34Oh, full view right there.
17:36All right.
17:37Whatever.
17:39Okay.
17:41It's okay.
17:42It's okay.
17:42It's like a dog.
17:43Come on.
17:44Come on.
17:44Hey, hey, hey.
17:46It's okay.
17:46Maybe you should go.
17:47It is.
17:48Hi, Jack.
17:49Hi, boy.
17:50It is.
17:51Hi, hi, hi.
17:52Yeah.
17:53It's time for you, boy.
17:54All right.
17:55All right.
17:56Going in for a kiss is a bit like stealing a bike.
17:59It's exciting.
18:01Risky.
18:02Yeah.
18:02But at a certain point, you just got to do it.
18:07Oh, God.
18:09You're so indigenous.
18:11And then you got to do it again.
18:14Oh, my God.
18:16Oh, my God.
18:19Never have I ever been to prison.
18:27Really?
18:31Yeah.
18:32It wasn't for anything bad.
18:33Like, it was just a bit of a misunderstanding.
18:36You're not a young offender anymore.
18:37You're an adult and an international drug smuggler.
18:40You're sentenced to six years in prison.
18:42Basically, it wasn't even our fault.
18:44Like, yeah.
18:48Oh, gosh.
18:49Excuse me.
18:49It's daddy.
18:50Oh, daddy.
18:52I know.
18:54Stop shouting.
18:56Oh.
18:57Yeah.
18:58Well, I wish that you weren't my father either.
19:01Oh, Dad's dead.
19:03Oh.
19:05Should we leave?
19:06I'll go, Geoff.
19:07No, no, no.
19:08Leave it to me.
19:10Enjoy yourselves, all right?
19:14Oh, shit.
19:14All right.
19:21You all right?
19:23No.
19:24What happened?
19:27Being made by a fucking arsehole happened.
19:29My dad was a prick, too.
19:31What about your mum?
19:32She's actually dead.
19:35I'm sorry.
19:36So what are you sorry for?
19:37You didn't kill her, did you?
19:39I mean, it'd be fairly awkward if you did, like...
19:43Did you?
19:43No.
19:44Okay.
19:50Oh, sorry.
19:55Should we maybe check on them?
19:58I'd leave it to them.
20:00Right.
20:00Oh, unless that's not the custom here.
20:04Oh, yeah.
20:05Yeah.
20:06I'm not really sure what the custom is here, to be honest.
20:09I ate a lot of oysters there.
20:11You're not that bad, you know.
20:14Despite all the stealing.
20:18I'm not really in the mood anymore.
20:22Sorry.
20:24No, don't worry both.
20:26Me neither, to be honest.
20:28I, uh...
20:28I'm fairly wrecked after the massage.
20:31Is it...
20:31Is it supposed to do that to you?
20:35I'd still like you to spend the night.
20:38Sorry.
20:40Um...
20:40Can I borrow your toothbrush, though?
20:43I don't think we should have sex anymore.
20:47Oh...
20:48Didn't even cross my mind.
20:50You can still tell Jock we did it, if you like.
20:54Thanks.
20:57What a spoon?
21:00Can I be a teaspoon?
21:03Can I be a teaspoon?
21:04No time.
21:07Go ahead.
21:08Go ahead.
21:09Go ahead.
21:10Psst, go ahead.
21:11Psst.
21:13Go ahead.
21:14What?
21:15No.
21:17I don't want to steal anything.
21:19No, I don't want to steal anything.
21:20No, I don't want to steal anything.
21:20I don't want to take a shot.
21:23I don't want to take a shot.
21:24I don't want to take a shot.
21:25I don't want to take a shot.
21:28I don't want to take a shot.
21:28Josh, Josh.
21:29Do you want me to put back the shambos?
21:32No, no, no.
21:33We'll take them.
21:34We'll take them.
21:50Charlie?
21:53Charlie?
21:58What's Charlie, buddy?
21:59Huh?
22:00What's Charlie?
22:01I don't know, boy.
22:02Where's Amy at?
22:03I don't know, boy.
22:04It's not me.
22:07Hey, man!
22:09Charlie?
22:09Hey, man!
22:11What you do with your chamboy?
22:12Sure.
22:14What's your chamboy?
22:15What's your chamboy?
22:18What's your chamboy?
22:22Where's our watch?
22:24Boy.
22:25Charlie!
22:26Hey, man!
22:27Yeah, boy.
22:27Where'd you put the cash?
22:28I didn't touch the cash.
22:29You had the cash.
22:30Why'd you put the cash?
22:31You didn't touch the cash.
22:32Where's my phone, kind of?
22:34Hey, man!
22:34Boy, where's my phone?
22:36It's on the table there.
22:37Where's my phone?
22:38It's on the table.
22:39Why'd you open your ears?
22:42Charlie!
22:43Hey, man!
22:44Hey, man!
22:44They must have it, boy.
22:46They've got it.
22:49Coyne, Coyne, Coyne.
22:50Huh?
22:53Dads.
22:54Who's that?
22:54Charlotte.
22:54I just wanted to leave a picture.
22:56We had a cracking time which he bought.
22:58Truly top boys here.
23:00Isn't that right, Emma?
23:01I can't believe you dopes fell for it.
23:04We only took them from school.
23:04That's Emma.
23:05That's them, boy.
23:06We're better looking.
23:07Sorry we ditched you, but you were sitting asleep.
23:10They're from car!
23:11Sorry we lied.
23:13And about stealing from me.
23:16Oi!
23:16That's our money, boy!
23:18Traitors, boy.
23:19Little rat bags.
23:20We didn't lie about everything.
23:21My dad is an arsehole.
23:23And I did want to pop my Irish hair in.
23:26Deceived by our own?
23:27Love you, lads.
23:28Thanks for covering all this.
23:30Love you, lads.
23:31Emma spoon me and everything.
23:32If that is your real name.
23:34Boy, we'd never have done that to them.
23:35Never.
23:35There's some things we would do,
23:36but we would never have done that.
23:38Not in a million years, boy.
23:39I'm joking, man.
23:40But what are they on about as well?
23:41Thanks for covering the hotel.
23:43Yeah.
23:43We didn't cover the room.
23:44I didn't cover anyone.
23:45What does that even mean?
23:46They left us.
23:47No.
23:47What?
23:49How much?
23:512,000 euro.
23:52They didn't buy the hotel room.
23:54I'm sorry, madam, but it was the penthouse.
23:56The penthouse?
23:57It wasn't our fault, ma'am.
23:59It was Charlotte and Emma.
24:00Yeah.
24:00What the hell are Charlotte and Emma?
24:02There were a couple of girls that we thought were rich
24:04and were going to give us the ride.
24:05Two grand for the ride.
24:07It's not a hope I'm paying this.
24:08I'm sorry, madam, but they did spend the night.
24:11Are their names on the reservation?
24:13No.
24:13Yeah.
24:14No.
24:14We're out of here.
24:15Let's go.
24:17Tell me you actually did get the ride.
24:18I know.
24:20Idiots.
24:21It's on our fight.
24:22We were out.
24:24Catfished by a couple of girls.
24:25It's all right.
24:25We got insurance.
24:26What the hell do you think insurance actually is?
24:29Well, we got you shampoo.
24:31I finally got my head around the whole insurance thing.
24:35As it turns out, they don't cover catfishing.
24:38But we did get SDIs from the hot tub.
24:40But not one of the bad ones.
24:42Just an itchy knob.
24:42No, no.
24:44No, no, no.
24:45No, no.
24:45No, no.
24:46No.
24:46No.
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