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Short filmTranscript
00:00:02New intimacy level unlocked.
00:00:09New skin dangerously hot is equipped.
00:00:18You're staring. You like what you see?
00:00:21Maybe.
00:00:30When are you going to tell my hero you are?
00:00:31You know who I really am. I'm Valleyqueen33.
00:00:35Such a dumb username.
00:00:37Oh, okay, guacamolewizard275.
00:00:39Don't talk to me about dumb usernames.
00:00:41You know, you're lucky you're cute.
00:00:43You don't even know what I look like.
00:00:45Well, I would if you agreed to meet me in person.
00:00:47Or at least a photo.
00:00:50Maybe someday.
00:00:55Crap, I'm late.
00:00:57Good luck, scholarship queen.
00:01:01Who needs luck when I have my talisman to remind me of my knight?
00:01:08In the game of castle claimers,
00:01:10I might be a warrior princess in love with a dashing knight.
00:01:13But on my first day at Edmunds Academy,
00:01:16I feel like a peasant.
00:01:19Watch it! This isn't public school.
00:01:23Forget your training wheels.
00:01:26At least I have my knight's charm to help me get through the day.
00:01:40Stop, stop, stop, stop the car!
00:01:44No!
00:01:46God, my knight's special talisman!
00:01:48It's ruined!
00:01:56He's so hot.
00:01:57Hey! I told you to stop the car!
00:02:04Oh my gosh, it's cold!
00:02:06He's so hot.
00:02:10Hey!
00:02:12What is wrong with you?
00:02:14Didn't you see me yelling and screaming for you to stop the car?
00:02:17Okay, I see you now, new girl.
00:02:19What are you with me, son?
00:02:21What are you talking about?
00:02:22Why?
00:02:24I thought you were one of my fans.
00:02:26No, I'm not one of your fans.
00:02:30You just broke something that's really important to me.
00:02:32Yeah, I broke a lot of hearts, buttercup.
00:02:35Okay?
00:02:37You should know that.
00:02:39I don't know who you are, but you were a...
00:02:42You were a...
00:02:45Asshole!
00:02:51Alright.
00:02:52I broke something of yours.
00:02:54Sure, but...
00:02:55Hey!
00:02:57You got my attention.
00:03:00So, in that case, we're even.
00:03:07Don't do it, Hayley.
00:03:10Have a good day.
00:03:13Don't do it!
00:03:15I got a hot mess, energy.
00:03:18Hey!
00:03:19Oh, fuck!
00:03:23Now we're even.
00:03:25My laptop better not be broken!
00:03:27I can't lose my connection to Valley Queen.
00:03:34You just made the wrong enemy.
00:03:37You just made the wrong enemy.
00:03:40I'm going to make every classroom,
00:03:43every hallway, and every rumor in this school your personal nightmare.
00:03:49I'm going to make your wife a living hell.
00:03:52What's going on?
00:03:53Cole's fighting the new girl.
00:03:54Now Cole's leaving the new girl.
00:03:56Yeah, idiot.
00:03:57I can see that.
00:04:00I just met an unhinged person.
00:04:02Good thing the universe balances it with you.
00:04:05Same.
00:04:05Ran into a certified asshole.
00:04:08Can't wait to see you in the game tonight.
00:04:12Cole, do you need help?
00:04:13I can help you.
00:04:17The new girl poured coffee on him.
00:04:18This bitch thinks that she can just roll up and piss off Michael.
00:04:22But he's not your Cole.
00:04:23Shut up, Lindsey.
00:04:25He's not yet.
00:04:27Come on.
00:04:29Hi.
00:04:30I'm Jen.
00:04:31And this is Lindsey.
00:04:33Hi.
00:04:34I'm Hailey.
00:04:35So nice to meet you.
00:04:37You have first day jitters.
00:04:38It's totally understandable.
00:04:39We want to make sure you feel really welcome.
00:04:41And so we'll take you to your locker.
00:04:43Come in.
00:04:44Bye there.
00:04:45Let's go.
00:04:49There you go.
00:04:51Thanks so much.
00:04:59Oh!
00:05:01That's so good.
00:05:13Aw, you're welcome, new girl.
00:05:15Honestly, it's kind of an improvement on your face.
00:05:23Guacamole wizard.
00:05:25Wow.
00:05:25What are you, catfishing some little lonely online gamer boy?
00:05:29Give it back.
00:05:30Hold on.
00:05:33Hey, if you go to Edmunds Academy, you should come to Locker 83 right now.
00:05:37Send.
00:05:38Here.
00:05:38Now your little gamer friend can see your ugly little face.
00:05:43So when can I meet the hero who ruined your billionaire shirt?
00:05:46I'm your friend first, Max. At least check on me.
00:05:49Oh, is it the online level?
00:05:51Ah, chill, please.
00:05:55No way.
00:05:57What is it?
00:05:58Oh, that would clean goes to the school.
00:06:00Cool.
00:06:05Please ignore that.
00:06:07Someone stole my phone and played a stupid prank.
00:06:09Send.
00:06:14What is wrong with you?
00:06:15You mess with Cole Edmunds and you're gonna mess with me.
00:06:18Edmunds?
00:06:19What?
00:06:20You don't know that his family owns the whole school?
00:06:23Wow.
00:06:23You really did crawl out of the gutter, didn't you?
00:06:27Stop recording me!
00:06:30Jen is a new girl.
00:06:32Jen is a new girl.
00:06:33Is the new girl...
00:06:35Valley Queen?
00:06:37There's no way the new girl is Valley Queen.
00:06:40Could it be...
00:06:41Jen?
00:06:44Ew.
00:06:47Your enemy is our enemy, Cole.
00:06:49And I just made sure that the new girl knows that.
00:06:52No chances, Jen.
00:06:54So is it.
00:06:56She does look kinda cute.
00:07:00Even I can feel the tension in the room.
00:07:03But we're into...
00:07:04Please ignore that.
00:07:06Someone stole my phone and played a stupid prank.
00:07:09What was I thinking?
00:07:10Of course she's not my online lover.
00:07:16Hey there, buttercup.
00:07:17Keep walking, Hayley.
00:07:19Just keep walking.
00:07:20You got a problem with shaving this morning, or...?
00:07:24My name's Hayley.
00:07:26Wow. Hayley.
00:07:27I think you, uh...
00:07:29You used to spell on your upper lip right there.
00:07:33What a coincidence!
00:07:35So did you!
00:07:36Oh, no!
00:07:39Oh, I'm sorry.
00:07:40I forgot you don't even need shaving cream.
00:07:43You're just a man-child with follicle issues.
00:07:49Whoever ends up with her must have failed an eye exam.
00:08:04I was so relieved to see you.
00:08:06Something happened today.
00:08:07I lost the game, I thought I'd never see you again.
00:08:10I think it's time we call this what it is.
00:08:13And what is this?
00:08:15What I think it is, is...
00:08:17I want to be with you, and you want to be with me.
00:08:22As more than just friends.
00:08:24Oh, thank God.
00:08:26I honestly want that more than anything.
00:08:27You're my soulmate.
00:08:29Like, I like you so much.
00:08:30Okay, well, since we're dating now, um...
00:08:34I'm ready to send my photo.
00:08:36Wait, really?
00:08:38Yeah.
00:08:39Get ready.
00:08:45Okay.
00:08:46No face.
00:08:48Just the boobs.
00:08:49Is it a bad idea?
00:08:51But all my online friends said it's cool.
00:08:53PG-13 nudes are harmless.
00:08:55All the kids do this.
00:08:57You'll love it.
00:09:02Ugh, this lighting hates me.
00:09:04Come on, Hayley.
00:09:05Confidence.
00:09:06You literally fight dragons online.
00:09:13Okay.
00:09:14Okay.
00:09:14Yeah.
00:09:15That's actually kind of...
00:09:16Oh, my God.
00:09:22Seriously?
00:09:23Hello?
00:09:24Anyone?
00:09:26Don't look at me!
00:09:31Don't look at me!
00:09:32We're trying not for viable, are we?
00:09:33I don't think you're supposed to do it like that.
00:09:36Get out.
00:09:37Now.
00:09:37Fine.
00:09:38Ow!
00:09:40Damn it!
00:09:44Come on.
00:10:18You're helping me.
00:10:19Yeah, well, I didn't point on it, but here we are.
00:10:28Excuse you.
00:10:29These boobs are for someone else.
00:10:31I don't have a boyfriend, do we?
00:10:32That is shocking.
00:10:34Yeah, actually.
00:10:35And he'd probably kill you right now if he saw you were flirting with me.
00:10:38Flirting?
00:10:39Yeah, don't flatter yourself.
00:10:40I've got a girlfriend too.
00:10:41My thoughts and prayers to her.
00:10:42Funny.
00:10:43Funny.
00:10:44Okay, well, can we just pretend this didn't happen and go our separate ways?
00:10:48Fine by me.
00:10:51Okay.
00:10:52Oh, no.
00:10:54Oh, no.
00:10:54I love the purple bra, by the way.
00:10:56I like it in a weird way.
00:10:57You're not even my type, but, you know, power theory, or whatever.
00:11:01Would you just get out of here?
00:11:11Hopefully, Quacamole Wizard will like it too.
00:11:15Jen, red alert.
00:11:17Cole and the new girl are for sure flirting.
00:11:19I think it's time to take drastic action.
00:11:24Don't be a coward.
00:11:25Just send it.
00:11:26Jen.
00:11:31Oh, my God.
00:11:33Here goes nothing.
00:11:41Still no response?
00:11:43Don't freak out.
00:11:43He's probably just busy.
00:11:48Give it back.
00:11:49Why?
00:11:50You don't want me to see your slutty little nude?
00:11:53Oh, this is actually a really good photo.
00:11:55Honestly, it's so good that I think the whole school should see it.
00:11:58Hmm.
00:11:59Did you get it, Lindsay?
00:11:59Mm-hmm.
00:12:00Got it.
00:12:03What are you doing?
00:12:15Oh, my God.
00:12:18Oh, my God.
00:12:20Oh, my God.
00:12:22I don't want me to lose.
00:12:26Let's get ratio.
00:12:29What are you doing?
00:12:30Oh, I didn't make времени.
00:12:32Oh.
00:12:33Oh.
00:12:34What's going on?
00:12:35Dude, your enemies nude just got put up on the big screen.
00:12:37What?
00:12:37Yeah.
00:12:52Come on.
00:12:54Let's see if these builds are photoshopped.
00:12:58Stop.
00:12:58Delete it, please.
00:12:59Delete it.
00:13:00Strips.
00:13:01Strips.
00:13:01Strips.
00:13:02Strips.
00:13:03Strips.
00:13:04Strips.
00:13:04Strips.
00:13:05Strips.
00:13:05Strips.
00:13:06Strips.
00:13:11Oh my brave knight.
00:13:13I wish you were here with me right now.
00:13:19Oh my god.
00:13:21Oh cool.
00:13:22Your enemy's kinda hot.
00:13:24Since you're so into slutty photos, why don't we just go ahead and go full nude?
00:13:51my school enemy is my allied girlfriend
00:13:59Stop it
00:14:11You okay, give that to me
00:14:15Give the phone back Jan, what's that alcohol? I thought you'd be happy
00:14:31How does it feel being exposed to the whole school not good, huh now if you don't delete it off
00:14:36your phone
00:14:36I'm exposed what else is fake about you, and I know it's not just your purse
00:14:41Why are you even defending her? She's the loser who has nude photos for random men
00:14:47And he's got more personality than all of you combined and if you mess with her you mess with me
00:14:51you hear me
00:14:57Hey, where are you? Cole is on my side now? Is he doing this to play with my feelings?
00:15:02I just need to be alone
00:15:02Hey
00:15:04Hey
00:15:09Cole is a rich asshole, and he said we were enemies, but why did I get butterflies when he looked
00:15:15at me today?
00:15:19Don't stay up too late, honey
00:15:20Love you mom
00:15:23Wait mom
00:15:28Do do people change?
00:15:31Like can a spoiled brat somehow become nice?
00:15:38Well, maybe just give them a second chance
00:15:58Tough day, huh?
00:15:59There's no more mozzarella sticks in the cafeteria. They're my favorite
00:16:04Noted. Is that all?
00:16:06The whole school treats me like I'm their punching bag
00:16:08I'm just trying to bring a little hope to my family and keep my scholarship
00:16:12Oh
00:16:13I'm really proud of you
00:16:15And then there's this guy
00:16:17He has this vendetta against me, but at the same time he's super contradictory
00:16:21It's so confusing
00:16:22Sounds like you're into this guy
00:16:26Sounds like you're into this guy
00:16:27No, I'm not into this guy
00:16:29I like you
00:16:30I like you
00:16:30Only you
00:16:36I really liked your photo by the way
00:16:38You did?
00:16:39Are you gonna reciprocate?
00:16:41I was thinking it would be better if we met in person
00:16:43That sounds amazing
00:16:44When? Where?
00:16:46About after school
00:16:47At the balcony
00:16:48I'll bring flowers
00:16:49Deal
00:16:59I'm about to meet my boyfriend
00:17:10Stop thinking about Cole
00:17:20Call me father
00:17:21Call me father
00:17:21I heard about you harassing Jen at school today
00:17:24Defending that nobody
00:17:26Haley girl
00:17:27He's not a nobody dad
00:17:28Are those for her?
00:17:34What the fuck?
00:17:38What the fuck?
00:17:39I know what Haley is, Cole
00:17:41Her mother works as a maid at my office
00:17:44That whole family is trash
00:17:46Stay away from her
00:17:48And what if I say no?
00:17:49Stay away from Haley Cole
00:17:51Or I'll fire her mother
00:17:54What if she found out that you are the one making her life miserable?
00:17:56I'm almost eighteen
00:17:58Soon I'll have my inheritance
00:18:00I hate to make Haley wait but
00:18:02She can't know who I am before I make sure her family is safe
00:18:07You're sick
00:18:09It's called watching out for your future
00:18:17Oh, hi
00:18:19I'm Haley
00:18:20Yes
00:18:22So nice to meet you
00:18:23God
00:18:25I'd give anything just to hear her say my name
00:18:27But the moment she knows
00:18:28I lose her forever
00:18:32Thank you for the flowers
00:18:33Thank you for the flowers
00:18:34You're so nice
00:18:39Guacamole wizard
00:18:40Fail
00:18:45Guacamole wizard
00:18:46Ew
00:18:48You're waiting for your stupid little secret boyfriend
00:18:51Antibetic
00:18:52Maybe he's married
00:18:53Or maybe he's fat
00:18:55And maybe he's sitting on his bike video
00:18:59I don't want any more trouble
00:19:02Why is guacamole wizard still not here?
00:19:04Oh no, we're not here to give you any trouble
00:19:06We just noticed that you didn't have any lunch
00:19:08And so we thought we would bring you a sandwich
00:19:12Eat it
00:19:25Help me
00:19:27So you think that you can just humiliate me?
00:19:29In front of the entire school?
00:19:32You're a maid's daughter
00:19:33So you can go ahead and eat trash
00:19:36Guacamole wizard, where are you?
00:19:38Oh and by the way
00:19:39Nicole's not gonna come save you
00:19:41Because after all, he's rich
00:19:43Like me
00:19:48I'm nothing like you
00:19:53Yeah, I'm nothing like you
00:19:56Cole again?
00:19:58Why is he always here when I need help?
00:20:01Pick it up
00:20:01Cole, we were kidding
00:20:03It's ketchup
00:20:05Pick that bloody thing up
00:20:10Take out of your phone and record this
00:20:19Didn't your dad tell you not to mess with Haley anymore?
00:20:22Don't think you have leverage here
00:20:23Cause I'll tell your mom how fucked up you are
00:20:26You're gonna hold that thing next to your face
00:20:28And do what I say
00:20:31I
00:20:31I
00:20:32Will leave Haley alone
00:20:36I will leave Haley alone
00:20:41Got it?
00:20:42Yeah
00:20:43Let's go
00:20:44What are you looking at?
00:20:49Got it?
00:20:50Let's go
00:20:58Uh, thank you
00:21:01Wow
00:21:03Never thought I'd hear you say that
00:21:07Why do you keep following me around?
00:21:09I just...
00:21:11I happen to see you
00:21:13Were you waiting at someone?
00:21:15Yeah
00:21:15My boyfriend actually
00:21:19Well, he...
00:21:21He kinda stood me up, so...
00:21:23Maybe you didn't do it on purpose
00:21:26Maybe you gotta do it nice today
00:21:29Cole, are you being nice to me?
00:21:32You thought we were enemies
00:21:34I mean, I still find you incredibly annoying though, so...
00:21:37Not that annoying?
00:21:39Maybe you'll like me once you realize I have layers
00:21:41Are you trying to play with my feelings, Cole Ednaz?
00:21:44Cause it's not gonna work
00:21:45I'm like those stupid, spoiled heiresses
00:21:53How'd that online boyfriend in your ears make you fall for her?
00:21:59He...
00:22:00He makes me feel safe
00:22:03You wouldn't understand it though
00:22:09I know
00:22:09You understand better than you think
00:22:12Cole understands me better than I think
00:22:16I see...
00:22:18How you touch him like this
00:22:29If you keep staring, I'm gonna think you like what you see
00:22:33No, no, my...
00:22:35My boyfriend has way better abs than you do
00:22:40In the game
00:22:42Oh, in the game, huh?
00:22:50Why does he have to smell so good?
00:22:56Are you a little slow in the game, too?
00:22:59I can see why he likes you
00:23:02I can see why he likes you
00:23:11I can't do this
00:23:14I love my boyfriend
00:23:15And you will never understand that
00:23:17He's smart and he's kind
00:23:19And he loves me for who I am
00:23:23That is so much more important to me than whatever this is between us
00:23:28I wish I could just tell her right now
00:23:37Wait, it couldn't be
00:23:41Cole, what was that notification on your phone?
00:23:46There's nothing
00:23:47Cole, who are you?
00:23:52What was that notification on your phone?
00:23:53It was my dad telling me my car got done getting waxed
00:23:58Champagne problems, huh?
00:24:01You live such a tough life
00:24:07What was I thinking?
00:24:08We are from two different worlds
00:24:11He just wants to play with me
00:24:12But why did I want to kiss him so badly?
00:24:19Why didn't you come to school today?
00:24:22I... got into a car accident
00:24:23Really? Are you okay?
00:24:25You have to keep me in the hospital till prom
00:24:27He was right
00:24:28Who?
00:24:29Nobody
00:24:30Which hospital are you staying at?
00:24:32I want to come visit you
00:24:33No, no, you can't
00:24:34I look miserable now
00:24:36You need to see me in style
00:24:38Fine, if you say so
00:24:40So, are we going to prom together?
00:24:43Hell yeah, we are
00:24:49Why would anyone want to sit next to her?
00:24:52Whoever needs a charity case
00:25:09Oh, you
00:25:10Oh, me
00:25:12Why is she so lucky?
00:25:14Cole's never been this way with any other girl
00:25:17People think you're really lucky to be my lab partner
00:25:19I'm sure you feel really lucky to be my lab partner
00:25:22Because you don't do any homework
00:25:29You finished it?
00:25:31It's okay
00:25:32We'll get to know each other more
00:25:33I'm not that curious about you actually
00:25:35I'm curious about you though
00:25:38Like, how close are you with your mom?
00:25:41What is he trying to do?
00:25:43It's none of your business, but I'm very close with my mom
00:25:46I'd kill anyone who hurts her
00:25:50Does Cole genuinely want to know me?
00:26:02So, are you going to prom?
00:26:04I don't know
00:26:05So you have a date
00:26:09Or shall I say victim?
00:26:11Are you jealous of me?
00:26:13Me? Jealous?
00:26:14No, why would I be jealous?
00:26:16Oh, because I think you so secretly want me
00:26:18You are so full of yourself
00:26:20You can do this on your own
00:26:22Yeah
00:26:24No way
00:26:26It's a self-locking door
00:26:28Really?
00:26:29Ms. Gorman's going to be back in an hour
00:26:30I'm sure it'll be fine
00:26:31I'm stuck here with you for a full hour?
00:26:34Okay, sorry, am I that bad?
00:26:36I think maybe we can pick up where we left the hall
00:26:39Don't worry, maybe trust me too
00:26:42We're keeping our distance this time actually
00:26:44Yeah
00:26:55That was my first kiss
00:26:59My first kiss was not supposed to go like that
00:27:01It was supposed to be special at prom and not just bumping lips
00:27:16You're really good at this
00:27:17One day when you regret it
00:27:20You know, we can do more if you want
00:27:37Hey, mate
00:27:38I've been wanting back, I want more than you think
00:27:41So you want me?
00:27:45I think you know what I want to do
00:27:51Do you want me?
00:27:53I want you.
00:27:59Oh, shit.
00:28:03Anyone in here?
00:28:07Oh, my God.
00:28:08How long have you two been in here?
00:28:10I really need to change this lock.
00:28:11Are you two okay?
00:28:13Yeah, we're good.
00:28:15We're okay.
00:28:17I don't know if you're happy to pass.
00:28:23Are you just going to pretend like that didn't happen?
00:28:26What didn't happen?
00:28:27Hairy.
00:28:28It's just hormones.
00:28:30Jake.
00:28:32Can you still play after your accident?
00:28:34Relax, I'm not dead.
00:28:35Wait, car accident?
00:28:37Guacamole wizard?
00:28:44I gotta go.
00:28:53Guacamole wizard.
00:28:54Huh?
00:28:57Are you all better after your car accident?
00:28:59Do I know you?
00:29:00Why is he being so standoffish?
00:29:02Is he trying to give me a surprise?
00:29:04Or he heard something about Cole?
00:29:07You're crushing your soda can.
00:29:10She thinks guacamole wizard is Jake Myers.
00:29:13She was in a real car accident.
00:29:15According to you, so is guacamole wizard.
00:29:17I can't take this anymore.
00:29:19Cole, wait.
00:29:21Oh, shit.
00:29:26What's up, guys?
00:29:28Um, we were just chatting.
00:29:31Chatting about Jake's grand plans to kick balls?
00:29:34Was there something that you wanted, Cole?
00:29:36Oh, God.
00:29:37Hey.
00:29:38I just figured I'd bring you some mozzarella sticks.
00:29:41They're your favorite, right?
00:29:44How did you know that?
00:29:47Tough day, huh?
00:29:47There's no more mozzarella sticks in the cafeteria.
00:29:50They're my favorite.
00:29:51He couldn't be Cole.
00:29:53Could he?
00:30:00The truth is, um...
00:30:01A dickhead?
00:30:04Would you honestly get out of here, bro?
00:30:05You came to my table, bro, and knocked my ball away.
00:30:15There it goes again.
00:30:16Cole is jealous.
00:30:18We got a problem here, Cole?
00:30:19We don't have a problem.
00:30:21We don't have a problem.
00:30:23Right?
00:30:24Tell Cole to get my ball, and we don't have a problem.
00:30:27Jake, it would take me forever to find one of your balls.
00:30:32I have the ball now.
00:30:33Can we stop measuring each other's dicks?
00:30:37Cole and Jake are fighting over Haley?
00:30:40Maybe I can use that.
00:30:44Jake!
00:30:45Hey!
00:30:46What if I told you that I have an internship opportunity for you with my dad?
00:30:50Wait, seriously?
00:30:51Yeah.
00:30:51Just one little catch.
00:30:52You have to pretend to like Hallie Roth.
00:30:58All right, you have the rest of the period to work on your lab reports.
00:31:01If you have any questions, I'll be at my desk.
00:31:04I thought Guacamole Wizard would feel more like Cole.
00:31:08But if he's really Jake, then maybe this was always going to end.
00:31:12You've literally been staring for five minutes.
00:31:14I'm thinking.
00:31:15About the report or about him?
00:31:17Why are you making it so weird about Jake?
00:31:19We literally made out of a sore dream.
00:31:21Maybe I've known Jake longer.
00:31:23No, you don't.
00:31:24How do you know that?
00:31:25You're going to prom with someone else.
00:31:27Stop acting like you're serious about me.
00:31:29You have no idea.
00:31:35Oh, my God.
00:31:37Is Jake asking me to prom?
00:31:52Hey, Lee, someone's here to see you.
00:32:05Are you asking me to prom?
00:32:08Too cheesy?
00:32:10No, it's cute.
00:32:11The accident?
00:32:13The mozzarella sticks?
00:32:14He is Guacamole Wizard.
00:32:16So, um, what do you think?
00:32:19You want to go to prom with me?
00:32:21I...
00:32:22I should feel happy.
00:32:23But why does this feel so wrong?
00:32:27Hey, can we not?
00:32:32Hey, can we not?
00:32:34Dude, seriously, what is your problem?
00:32:36My problem here, dude, is that me and my lab partner have work to do.
00:32:39And you're out here to strike me with bad puns.
00:32:42Wow.
00:32:43That is some weak shit, man.
00:32:45Oh.
00:32:46That's weak shit?
00:32:47Is this weak shit?
00:32:51Oh, my God.
00:32:59Wow.
00:33:00He's got really pretty eyes.
00:33:07Wait, I can't.
00:33:08Colt, put me down.
00:33:10Put me down.
00:33:10Put me down.
00:33:13Don't do that again.
00:33:26New couple alert.
00:33:29Fuck off, Jen.
00:33:30Why do you hate me so much, Cole?
00:33:32You and I, we're not that different.
00:33:34And if you'd realize and give me a chance, I think that we would make a great match.
00:33:38Like, say, if you asked me to prom.
00:33:42I might say yes.
00:33:45Jen, you want to go to prom with me, Jen, you want to go to prom with me?
00:33:52We're both hot, and we're both rich, and our dads have been in business, like, forever, so.
00:33:58I don't know.
00:33:59How romantic.
00:33:59I think I'll pass.
00:34:02You're going to regret this, Cole Edmonds.
00:34:07Oh, here they come.
00:34:09If I message Corkamole Wizard, I wonder if Jake's phone will ding.
00:34:15What should we wear to prom?
00:34:17And the Dean's List.
00:34:20Thanks, man.
00:34:27I'll talk to you later.
00:34:28I'll see you around school, okay?
00:34:29Okay, yeah, I'll see you later.
00:34:30Bye.
00:34:32He's so different.
00:34:33Maybe he's still recovering from the accident?
00:34:38Haley?
00:34:47Jeez.
00:34:49God.
00:34:55Here, I'll get it.
00:34:56No.
00:35:02Oh, you're scared of me seeing all the girls in your phone?
00:35:05I don't care.
00:35:05I do care.
00:35:14Haley, I...
00:35:25I don't put a prom with Jake.
00:35:27I mean, he only knows you like mozzarella sticks because of me.
00:35:30He doesn't even know you.
00:35:31And you do?
00:35:32How do you know I like mozzarella sticks?
00:35:34That's something I've only ever talked about.
00:35:36Because I pay attention to what you like.
00:35:40I noticed it at lunch.
00:35:42The first day.
00:35:44You were watching me?
00:35:47Just don't go to prom and shake.
00:36:03Move!
00:36:05Cole is talking to Haley again.
00:36:07Your job is to keep them away from each other, Jake.
00:36:10Unless you don't want that internship that my dad got you.
00:36:12Obviously I do.
00:36:13Okay, then break them up, idiot.
00:36:16Uh, what do I do?
00:36:20I've got a few ideas.
00:36:25Hey, look.
00:36:28Someone will take you to prom.
00:36:30I promise.
00:36:31Yeah?
00:36:31Really, like who?
00:36:32I mean, the whole school hates me, except for Jake.
00:36:36And you.
00:36:37But you're not asking me.
00:36:40Hey.
00:36:42Oh, hey, Jake.
00:36:43Hey, Hal.
00:36:44Um, I just wanted to thank you again for the other night.
00:36:49The other night?
00:36:51Yeah, it was so sexy.
00:36:55You're so sexy.
00:36:57Jake, what are you talking about?
00:37:01I hate to break it to you, asshole, but she's my prom date.
00:37:09And she's a real tiger in the pep room.
00:37:13Oh, shit.
00:37:15Oh, shit.
00:37:17Come on.
00:37:22Oh.
00:37:23Oh, my God.
00:37:29Oh, shit.
00:37:32Stop.
00:37:33Stop, guys.
00:37:34Stop it.
00:37:34Stop.
00:37:35Stop.
00:37:36What the hell is going on over there?
00:37:40Shit.
00:37:41It's Principal Stevens.
00:37:42I've got to save Cole.
00:37:43I mean, Jake.
00:37:44I've got to save Jake.
00:37:50Oh.
00:37:51Oh, my God.
00:37:52Principal Stevens.
00:37:53I'm so sorry.
00:37:55Haley Rock.
00:37:57That's detention.
00:37:58After school.
00:37:59Don't be late.
00:38:01Oh, my God.
00:38:05Oh, my God.
00:38:05Oh, my God.
00:38:16What are you doing here?
00:38:18Can we keep you company?
00:38:20It's the least I could do if you saved my house today.
00:38:25The locker thing, that was an accident.
00:38:27Oh, sure.
00:38:30So, uh, you and Jake, huh?
00:38:34No.
00:38:36He lied about that.
00:38:37I don't know why, though.
00:38:39Good.
00:38:40You know, father, asshole, every time he looks at you, makes me sick to my stomach.
00:38:46Thinking about him touching you, kissing you.
00:38:49I could kill him.
00:38:53Promise me you won't go to prom with it.
00:38:58Okay, fine.
00:38:59I won't.
00:39:02Because I want to go to prom with you.
00:39:07Okay, everyone.
00:39:08Let's start off by mixing our sodium bicarbonate.
00:39:18Oh, my God.
00:39:19I am so fed up with this.
00:39:38Oh, sorry.
00:39:40My trips.
00:39:41No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
00:39:43What?
00:39:44It always has to be about her, doesn't it?
00:39:49They're dead.
00:39:51They're both dead.
00:39:52Oh.
00:39:54How am I going to be able to talk to Guacamole Wizard?
00:39:59Oh.
00:40:00What are you?
00:40:01Are you almost crying?
00:40:03It's probably because you can't afford a new one.
00:40:07Jen, what's going on over there?
00:40:17Wait.
00:40:19No, what's going on is Jen is getting a taste of her own medicine.
00:40:22Mrs. Gorman's burning.
00:40:24Mr. Edmonds.
00:40:25Oh, please.
00:40:26It's baking soda and water.
00:40:27You're fine.
00:40:28Detention.
00:40:29Today, after school.
00:40:31Shit.
00:40:43Jake, hey.
00:40:44Oh, uh, sorry.
00:40:46Got to get to student council.
00:40:50Hey, you didn't even try the rice trick.
00:40:53The rice trick?
00:40:56Yeah.
00:40:58You don't know about the...
00:41:00Come on.
00:41:14Hey.
00:41:15Um, Ella.
00:41:17It's Emma.
00:41:18Yeah, that's what I said.
00:41:20Can you hack a broken laptop?
00:41:24Amazing.
00:41:31Hey, it's going to be okay.
00:41:33We'll pour out in a few more minutes and it'll be like the whole thing never happened.
00:41:37No, it's not just the phone or the laptop.
00:41:40It means...
00:41:40It means I can't...
00:41:42Can't what?
00:41:46I talked to a friend online.
00:41:49He's really important to me.
00:41:53And I'm sure you're really important to him.
00:42:06You know, Cole, if you look past all that hair gel and big ol' ego and rich kid for bravo...
00:42:14Okay, okay.
00:42:15I get it.
00:42:19You're kind of sweet.
00:42:24Hey, look at that.
00:42:27Oh, my God.
00:42:30Oh, my God.
00:42:32You're a miracle worker.
00:42:38Oh, what is taking so long?
00:42:40You doused this thing in sodium bicarbonate.
00:42:43Shut up, Ella.
00:42:44It's Emma.
00:42:45Whatever.
00:42:52Oh, my God.
00:43:00Oh, morning, Valley Whore.
00:43:03How are things in the castle?
00:43:06Oh, my God.
00:43:10Valley Whore?
00:43:11What are they talking about?
00:43:27Guacamole Wizard, when can we be together in person?
00:43:31Guacamole Wizard, I want you so badly, I dream about you touching me.
00:43:35Oh, my God.
00:43:35Someone hacked my castle claimers messages.
00:43:38Touch me, guacamole wizard.
00:43:41Hey, Valley Whore.
00:43:43Show them what you really like.
00:44:02Here you go.
00:44:04Here, this is for you.
00:44:09Oh, do you like what I've done with the place?
00:44:11You hacked my laptop?
00:44:14Oh, no, it wasn't me.
00:44:15It was that kid, Ella.
00:44:17But I definitely got to reap the benefits.
00:44:19What kind of incel sex over a video game, Hayley?
00:44:22What are you, catfishing this guy?
00:44:24No, I'm not trying to catfish him.
00:44:26Hey, everyone.
00:44:26I think Valley Whore is a catfish.
00:44:30Because who in their right mind would spend their time thirsting over you?
00:44:59Stop it, stop, stop.
00:45:03I thought I'd send the janitor some time.
00:45:09Jake!
00:45:10Hey.
00:45:12Now's the time.
00:45:14Tell them.
00:45:15Tell them what?
00:45:16That you're a guacamole wizard.
00:45:19Who's guacamole wizard?
00:45:22Here you go.
00:45:25Oh, my God.
00:45:27Did you think that Jake was your secret little online boyfriend?
00:45:29Oh, sweetie, I've been bribing him this whole time to pretend to like you.
00:45:34What?
00:45:34Why would you do that?
00:45:36Oh, I don't know, Cole.
00:45:37Why do you think I would do that?
00:45:40Jake, is this true?
00:45:42Have you been pretending to like me this whole time?
00:45:46Sorry.
00:45:47It was nothing personal?
00:45:54Yeah, nothing personal.
00:45:56Oh!
00:45:57Oh!
00:46:02All right, all right, all right.
00:46:04Enough!
00:46:04What in the world is going on here?
00:46:07Is that a leaf blower?
00:46:08That's all him.
00:46:10Okay, well, you both have detention, so...
00:46:17Let me get this straight.
00:46:18You stole a leaf blower and defaced school property?
00:46:22It wasn't school property, Dad.
00:46:24It was Jen's cyber boy spreadsheets.
00:46:25Jesus Christ, how does she always get away with this shit?
00:46:29Could it be because her father's running for Senate, Cole?
00:46:32You think that's what it could be?
00:46:33Who cares?
00:46:34I care.
00:46:36And I hear she's got an eye for you.
00:46:38So you're taking her to prom.
00:46:40What?
00:46:41Over my dead body.
00:46:42Oh, because you're like that Haley girl?
00:46:46I'm firing her mother right now.
00:46:47No, no, please don't.
00:46:49Please.
00:46:50Then you're taking Jen to prom.
00:46:52Max's dad called.
00:46:53He said he's having a party tomorrow.
00:46:55You're going to go, and you're going to ask Jen to prom.
00:46:58End of discussion.
00:47:05Come on, you big coward.
00:47:07Message him.
00:47:08Just do it, just do it.
00:47:12You must think I'm the biggest idiot.
00:47:21I could never think that.
00:47:28But I thought you were Jake.
00:47:30Please, can't you just tell me now?
00:47:31I think I've had enough public humiliation for one lifetime.
00:47:38I heard that guy Max is throwing a party tomorrow.
00:47:41If you want, I'll meet you there.
00:47:53OK, you got this, Haley.
00:47:56Just take a deep breath.
00:47:58You got this.
00:47:59You got this.
00:48:03You look beautiful.
00:48:07Thank you, Mom.
00:48:16Tasty.
00:48:16I have to do something.
00:48:27Hey, Haley.
00:48:28I'm glad you came.
00:48:29You look so pretty.
00:48:31Hi.
00:48:31Hey, Max.
00:48:32Your house is gorgeous.
00:48:34I mean.
00:48:35No, it's just my parents' blood money.
00:48:36You know, they're upstairs watching The Last of Us right now.
00:48:39They don't care about shit.
00:48:40Get drunk, girl.
00:48:41Woo!
00:48:44Yeah.
00:48:55What are you doing here, valley whore?
00:48:59Looks like the catfish came out of the pond.
00:49:02Hey, everyone.
00:49:03Let's give it up for valley whore.
00:49:04Valley whore!
00:49:09Jen, why are you doing this?
00:49:11What have I even done to you?
00:49:12To me, oh, I'm actually concerned about our whole community because those little cringy
00:49:17messages on your castle game, those are concerning.
00:49:20Actually, I kind of feel a bit of a perv.
00:49:22Did you know that?
00:49:23Haley.
00:49:24She's a little pervy princess.
00:49:26Pervy princess.
00:49:29Pervy princess.
00:49:31Pervy princess.
00:49:32Pervy princess.
00:49:35Hey, let's get pervy tonight.
00:49:37Leave me alone.
00:49:40Is there a fire?
00:49:41Okay, we set off the alarm.
00:49:55Oh?
00:49:59Hello?
00:50:17How are you?
00:50:34are you him would you stop trying to find your stupid little cyber boyfriend okay cole is not
00:50:41him anyways we are going to the prom together no i'm not yes you are it's okay you can be
00:50:48honest about your feelings so you too this whole time oh my god i am such an idiot hey wait
00:51:00wait
00:51:06please at least take my jackets you know if you really wanted to humiliate me you didn't have to
00:51:11go to the extra effort jen was doing just fine i wasn't trying to humiliate you then what were
00:51:15you're trying to do i guess you obviously the white quills were just an added bonus i knew i
00:51:21shouldn't trusted you and what about guacamole was it what are you
00:51:36just the devil get in the car
00:51:43i'm not going to ask you again cole get in the car
00:51:47hey can you just act normal for once and please introduce yourself to hailey
00:51:51i already assumed that's who this was i'm mr happens so you're the scholarship trash that's
00:51:58hell-bent on ruining cole's life well i've got news for you young lady my son is going to marry
00:52:04a good girl from a respectable family and that's not you you will be forgotten you're a maid's
00:52:12daughter and your mom works for me stay away from him or i swear to god your mother is fire
00:52:20dad stop don't you touch my family i'll stay away
00:52:25hey come on you don't mean that
00:52:29i hate everything you stand for i hate your greed and your callousness and your elitist ideas of what
00:52:37you think a good person looks like i hate everything about you i hate all of it
00:52:42i don't want any part of it so cole go with your dad
00:52:49hailey
00:52:53fuck this
00:52:58no laptop and no phone for a week ever since mom died you've turned into this cold patriarch
00:53:04hailey not that's real love why do you have to make me so miserable
00:53:07i promised your mother i would make you a success son even if it meant saving you from yourself
00:53:21hi hailey i'm emma i know you are right i just felt kind of bad that i accidentally helped
00:53:29and ruin your life so i wanted to return your laptop to you goodness new
00:53:38oh wow thanks emma okay bye
00:53:47one down one to go you're so cool i know emma want to go to prom why not let's get
00:53:56these
00:53:57love birds together
00:54:02hi mr edmund hi max and max's friend sorry we weren't expecting you cole's grounded oh he is
00:54:11but it was his 18th birthday today what can i say max actions have consequences birthday or no cole is
00:54:20grounded well that really sucks because he is uh also the president of the prom committee we were
00:54:27supposed to review budgets today cole my son cole reviewing budgets he's never reviewed a budget a day
00:54:35in his life well mr edmunds today could be that day and we just have to give him back this
00:54:39school
00:54:40sanctioned laptop so we can get back to his very important and very respectable budgetary work
00:54:53go away
00:54:58max what what are you guys doing here happy birthday cole i brought you my laptop and logged into your
00:55:04castle
00:55:05claimers account just get it back to me by tomorrow what what's going on dude it's your 18th birthday
00:55:11you can tell hayley who you are now you can be together just log into this stupid game and tell
00:55:16the girl who you love who you really are no i'll tell her myself stick me in your car
00:55:29welcome all the wizard mom i'm fine i just need some time alone
00:55:44open the door wait what he's here
00:55:56it's you
00:55:58i should have given you this to you a long time
00:56:02hayley i wanted to tell you who i was from the very beginning
00:56:05my dad threatened to follow your mom and i had to wait a really long time to tell you who
00:56:10i was
00:56:10i got my inheritance and i can protect you and your family so you don't have to choose
00:56:28i understand if this changes things
00:56:31if you don't love me the way you love guacamole wizard but
00:56:37i need you to know i love you
00:56:51cool i love you
00:56:53you do
00:56:55yes you idiot
00:56:57i've loved you for months
00:56:58i mean this whole guacamole wizard thing was so confusing though because i had to be loyal to him
00:57:03and
00:57:05but you're him
00:57:07you didn't expect her
00:57:09i mean i i always hoped it was you
00:57:14until you hoped
00:57:17yes i hoped it was you
00:57:18you were always there for me
00:57:25you're really fucking hot
00:57:30hey uh
00:57:31one of those things i said we could do
00:57:34you ever go
00:57:36yeah
00:57:40take my clothes out
00:57:41i'm getting there don't worry
00:57:45i'm so beyond you
00:57:47just beyond me
00:57:51i'm so beyond you
00:58:05okay so
00:58:06what do you think
00:58:0810 out of 10
00:58:09yeah
00:58:10yeah
00:58:10one do again
00:58:11i'll get sex with sex with me specifically
00:58:14i've only ever had sex with you specifically
00:58:17all right
00:58:17all right that's fair
00:58:19i'll uh
00:58:20i'll take that as a win
00:58:26what is my life now
00:58:27am i being nice to cole eggnance
00:58:30oh god no i fully expect you to
00:58:33continue to berate me endlessly
00:58:36no i'll just
00:58:37i'll just lust behind it
00:58:39there's always been lust behind it
00:58:41i'll see you in a minute
00:58:42stop it
00:58:46um
00:58:47i think
00:58:49isn't promenade
00:58:50i think you know if it's promenade
00:58:53okay
00:58:55but
00:58:55the real question is
00:58:56do you got a date
00:59:00cole are you asking me to prom
00:59:02oh i would have asked you earlier
00:59:04but jay kind of gave me to the gym
00:59:06oh god please don't mention his name again
00:59:07i don't want to hear it
00:59:09yeah you don't have to ask me twice
00:59:11but i don't even have a dress
00:59:14later
00:59:18i just slept with cole edmonds
00:59:21and i'm in love with cole edmonds
00:59:22who would have guessed
00:59:27i thought
00:59:29only the best for my princess
00:59:31where did you get that
00:59:33uh
00:59:33i might have gotten you a dress
00:59:36on the off chance that you
00:59:39might have wanted to go to prom with me
00:59:40and maybe had nothing to wear
00:59:44of course i'll go to prom with you
00:59:50mr edmonds
00:59:51i didn't expect you to be here
00:59:53cole
00:59:54are you here
00:59:57cole
00:59:57are you here
01:00:00mr edmonds
01:00:00you can't just park into my house like this
01:00:03i see you cole
01:00:03you are in big trouble
01:00:21hey uh
01:00:23you almost done in there
01:00:24you try changing into an evening gown
01:00:27in a bunch of thorny bushes
01:00:30okay i'm ready
01:00:42what do you think
01:00:47my god hayley you are the most beautiful thing i have ever seen
01:00:54i just hunched over in a car mirror to do this lipstick
01:00:56you're not messing it up for at least 20 minutes
01:00:5920 more minutes
01:01:01we're in
01:01:02deal
01:01:06thank you all for using the prom voting site to cast your votes i hear we have a winner
01:01:14and your 2026 prom queen is
01:01:18jen longfellow
01:01:21thank you
01:01:22oh my god
01:01:24thank you guys so much
01:01:27seriously this makes the world to me
01:01:29i mean like who else would win right
01:01:32oh this is just the perfect moment
01:01:38oh my god that's hayley and cole
01:01:42it was fun
01:01:43sis what did you get
01:01:44what's
01:01:49there uh
01:01:50most time that's up
01:01:52no
01:01:52but
01:01:53who cares
01:01:56hell yeah
01:02:00ew literally what the fuck
01:02:02damn yeah
01:02:03language
01:02:03i am the queen okay she's just a little pervy princess
01:02:07come on everyone say it with me
01:02:09pervy princess pervy princess pervy princess
01:02:18wait wait wait wait what are those those are texts between me and my dad
01:02:22make cole edmunds fall in love with you his dad's month is essential to funding my campaign
01:02:29don't worry daddy if i can't have it no one can
01:02:34i'm gonna destroy hayley rod's life is this real
01:02:39jen's crazy
01:02:41who did this
01:02:44who did this
01:02:47what you exploited me for a hacking job and didn't think i was gonna hack your phone
01:02:51you little skit
01:02:53you know jen as the principal i'm supposed to remain impartial and above all of this petty drama
01:03:02but quite frankly you are the worst and i think it's time that you are expelled from edmunds academy
01:03:10you can't do that i'm the principal so uh yes i can
01:03:23there was no winter chick you lied to me
01:03:39oh my princess finally has a crown
01:03:44now all i need is my handsome prince oh yeah no can do all i have to offer is a
01:03:50bowie knight with a chip on his shoulder and a awesome sense of humor
01:03:54oh how can i refuse
01:04:02oh no that's my dad
01:04:07we are going home right now
01:04:10you disobeyed me for the last time boy
01:04:12yeah i'm not a boy dad
01:04:14you talk all the time
01:04:16about wanting a man that's worthy of the family last name
01:04:19yet
01:04:19you can't see i've already become that man
01:04:22and it's because of hayley
01:04:24and you can accept that
01:04:26i'll make my own path
01:04:27and best believe me i can
01:04:30i'll say this
01:04:32it's the most backbone i've ever seen in you cole
01:04:37joy prime
01:04:45i am so proud of you
01:04:48i kind of done with all you being by my side
01:04:51that was terrifying
01:04:53it's not like we haven't slayed a dragon before
01:04:55no so
01:04:57i love you galakuni
01:04:59i love you guacamole wizard
01:05:01oh my god i gotta change that username
01:05:03yeah you do
01:05:04oh fair
01:05:04oh fair
01:05:05oh fair
01:05:05oh fair
01:05:07oh fair
01:05:08oh fair
01:05:08oh fair
01:05:10oh fair
01:05:10oh fair
01:05:14oh fair
01:05:16You
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