- 12 hours ago
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Short filmTranscript
00:00:02New intimacy level unlocked.
00:00:09New skin dangerously hot is equipped.
00:00:18You're staring. You like what you see?
00:00:21Maybe.
00:00:30When are you gonna tell me I hate who you are?
00:00:32You know who I really am. I'm ValleyQueen33.
00:00:35Such a dumb username.
00:00:37Oh, okay, guacamole wizard275.
00:00:39Don't talk to me about dumb usernames.
00:00:42You know, you're lucky you're cute.
00:00:43You don't even know what I look like.
00:00:45Well, I would if you agreed to meet me in person.
00:00:47Or at least a photo.
00:00:50Maybe someday.
00:00:55Crap, I'm late.
00:00:57Good luck, Skylifter Queen.
00:01:01Who needs luck when I have my talisman to remind me of my knight?
00:01:09In the game of castle claimers,
00:01:11I might be a warrior princess in love with a dashing knight.
00:01:14But on my first day at Edmunds Academy,
00:01:16I feel like a peasant.
00:01:19Watch it!
00:01:20This isn't public school.
00:01:23Forget your training wheels.
00:01:26At least I have my knight's charm to help me get through the day.
00:01:40Stop, stop, stop, stop the car!
00:01:44No!
00:01:46God, my knight's special talisman!
00:01:49It's ruined!
00:01:56He's so hot.
00:01:57Hey!
00:01:57I told you to stop the car!
00:02:04Oh my gosh, it's cool!
00:02:05He's so hot!
00:02:10Hey!
00:02:12What is wrong with you?
00:02:13Didn't you see me yelling and screaming for you to stop the car?
00:02:16Okay, I see you now, new girl.
00:02:18What are you with me, son?
00:02:20What are you talking about?
00:02:22Why?
00:02:24I thought you were one of my fans.
00:02:26No, I'm not one of your fans!
00:02:30You just broke something that's really important to me!
00:02:32Yeah, I broke a lot of hearts, player cop.
00:02:34Okay?
00:02:37You should know that.
00:02:38I don't know who you are, but you were a...
00:02:41You were a...
00:02:42Eh...
00:02:45Asshole!
00:02:45Uh...
00:02:51Alright...
00:02:51I broke something of yours.
00:02:54Sure, but...
00:02:55Hey!
00:02:56You got my attention!
00:02:59So, in that case, we're even.
00:03:07Don't do it, Hayley!
00:03:10Have a good day!
00:03:13Don't do it!
00:03:15I got a hot mess energy
00:03:21Oh fuck
00:03:23Now we're even
00:03:24My laptop better not be broken
00:03:26I can't lose my connection to Valley Queen
00:03:33You just made the wrong enemy
00:03:37You just made the wrong enemy
00:03:39I'm going to make every classroom
00:03:42Every hallway and every rumor
00:03:45In this school you're a personal nightmare
00:03:48I'm going to make your life a living out
00:03:51What's going on?
00:03:52Cole's fighting the new girl
00:03:53Now Cole's leaving the new girl
00:03:55Yeah, idiot
00:03:56I can see that
00:03:59Just met an unhinged person
00:04:01Good thing the universe balances it with you
00:04:04Same
00:04:05Ran into a certified asshole
00:04:07Can't wait to see you in the game tonight
00:04:11Cole, do you need to go?
00:04:12Do you need help?
00:04:13I can help you
00:04:16The new girl poured coffee on him
00:04:18This bitch thinks that she can just roll up
00:04:20And piss off Michael
00:04:21But he's not your Cole
00:04:22Shut up, Lindsay
00:04:24He's not yet
00:04:26Come on
00:04:29Hi, I'm Jen
00:04:30And this is Lindsay
00:04:33Hi, I'm Hailey
00:04:34So nice to meet you
00:04:36You have first day jitters?
00:04:37That's totally understandable
00:04:38We want to make sure you feel really welcome
00:04:40And so we'll take you to your locker
00:04:42Good
00:04:44Let's go
00:04:49There you go
00:04:50Thanks so much
00:05:12Aw, you're welcome new girl
00:05:14Honestly it's kind of an improvement on your face
00:05:22Guacamole wizard
00:05:23Wow
00:05:24What are you catfishing?
00:05:25Some little lonely online gamer boy?
00:05:28Give it back
00:05:29Hold on
00:05:31Hey, if you go to Edmonds Academy
00:05:33You should come to locker 83 right now
00:05:36Send
00:05:36Here
00:05:37Now your little gamer friend can see your ugly little face
00:05:42So when can I meet the hero who ruined your billionaire shirt?
00:05:45I'm your friend first Max, at least check on me
00:05:48Oh, is it the online level?
00:05:50Ah, chill, please
00:05:54No way
00:05:55What is it?
00:05:57Oh, the Hell Queen goes to the school
00:06:04Please ignore that
00:06:05Someone stole my phone and played a stupid prank
00:06:08Send
00:06:12What is wrong with you?
00:06:14You messed with Cole Edmonds and you're gonna mess with me
00:06:17Edmonds?
00:06:18What?
00:06:19You don't know that his family owns the whole school?
00:06:21Wow, you really did crawl out of the gutter, didn't you?
00:06:26Stop recording me
00:06:29Jen is a new girl
00:06:30Wait
00:06:32Is the new girl...
00:06:33Valley Queen?
00:06:36There's no way the new girl is Valley Queen
00:06:38Could it be...
00:06:39Jen?
00:06:42Ew
00:06:46Your enemy is our enemy Cole
00:06:48And I just made sure that the new girl knows that
00:06:51No chances Jen
00:06:52So is it
00:06:54She does look kinda cute
00:06:58Even I can feel the tension in the room
00:07:01But we're into the fuck
00:07:03Please ignore that
00:07:04Someone stole my phone and played a stupid prank
00:07:06What was I thinking?
00:07:08Of course she's not my online lover
00:07:14Hey there, buttercup
00:07:15Keep walking, Hayley
00:07:17Just keep walking
00:07:18You got a problem with shaving this morning, or?
00:07:22My name's Hayley
00:07:24Well...
00:07:25Hayley
00:07:25I think you uh...
00:07:27You used to spell on your upper lip right there
00:07:31What a coincidence
00:07:33So did you!
00:07:34Oh no!
00:07:37Oh, I'm sorry
00:07:39I forgot you don't even need shaving cream
00:07:41You're just a man-child with follicle issues
00:07:47Whoever ends up with her must have failed an eye exam
00:08:02I was so relieved to see you
00:08:03Something happened today
00:08:05I lost the game, I thought I'd never see you again
00:08:08I think it's time we call this what it is
00:08:11And what is this?
00:08:13What I think it is, is...
00:08:15I wanna be with you
00:08:17And you wanna be with me
00:08:19As more than just friends
00:08:21Oh, thank God
00:08:23I honestly want that more than anything
00:08:25You're my soul mate
00:08:27Like, I like you so much
00:08:28Okay, well, since we're dating now
00:08:31Um...
00:08:32I'm ready to send my photo
00:08:34Wait, really?
00:08:36Yeah, get ready
00:08:44Okay, no face
00:08:45Just the boobs
00:08:47Is it a bad idea?
00:08:49But all my online friends said it's cool
00:08:51PG-13 nudes are harmless
00:08:53All the kids do this
00:08:55You'll love it
00:09:00This lighting hates me
00:09:02Come on, Hayley
00:09:03Confidence
00:09:04You literally fight dragons online
00:09:11Okay, yeah
00:09:13That's actually kind of
00:09:14Oh my God, seriously?
00:09:21Hello?
00:09:22Anyone?
00:09:24Don't look at me!
00:09:28Don't look at me!
00:09:29We're trying not for viable, are we?
00:09:31I don't think you're supposed to do it like that
00:09:33Get out! Now!
00:09:35Fine
00:09:35Ow!
00:09:37Damn it!
00:09:40What's wrong?
00:10:15You're helping me?
00:10:16Yeah, well, I didn't plan on it, but here we are
00:10:26Excuse you, these boobs are for someone else
00:10:28We got a little boyfriend, do we?
00:10:30That is shocking
00:10:31Yeah, actually
00:10:32And he'd probably kill you right now if you saw you were flirting with me
00:10:35Flirting?
00:10:36Yeah, don't lie to yourself
00:10:37I've got a girlfriend too
00:10:38My thoughts and prayers to her
00:10:40Funny
00:10:41Okay, well, can we just pretend this didn't happen and go our separate ways?
00:10:46Fine by me
00:10:49Oh no
00:10:51Oh no
00:10:52With all the purple bra, by the way
00:10:53I like it in a weird way
00:10:55Not even my type, but
00:10:57You know, power theory
00:10:58Or whatever
00:10:59Would you just get out of here?
00:11:09Hopefully guacamole wizard will like it too
00:11:13Jen, red alert
00:11:14Cole and the new girl are for sure flirting
00:11:17I think it's time to take drastic action
00:11:21Don't be a coward
00:11:22Just send it
00:11:23Jen
00:11:28Oh my god
00:11:29Here goes nothing
00:11:38Still no response?
00:11:40Don't freak out, he's probably just busy
00:11:46Give it back
00:11:46Why?
00:11:47You don't want me to see your slutty little nude?
00:11:50Oh, this is actually a really good photo
00:11:52Honestly, it's so good that I think the whole school should see it
00:11:55Did you get it, Lindsay?
00:11:57Got it
00:12:01What are you doing?
00:12:03I don't know
00:12:04I love you
00:12:05I love you
00:12:13I love you
00:12:15I love you
00:12:15Oh my god
00:12:16Oh my god
00:12:17Oh my god
00:12:18Oh my god
00:12:21What's going on?
00:12:23What's up?
00:12:27Holy shit
00:12:28Oh
00:12:30Yo, what's going on dude your enemies new just got put up on the big screen. What's yeah?
00:12:51Those are photoshopped
00:13:08Oh my brave knight I wish you were here with me right now
00:13:16My god, oh cool fair enemies kind of hot since you're so into slutty photos
00:13:23Why don't we just go ahead and go full nude?
00:13:28No
00:13:47My school enemy is my online girlfriend
00:13:53Stop it
00:13:58Oh my god
00:14:07You okay?
00:14:10Give that to me
00:14:18Now give the phone back Jan
00:14:20What the hell Cole? I thought you'd be happy
00:14:28How does it feel being exposed to the whole school?
00:14:30Not good, huh?
00:14:31Now if you don't delete it off your phone, I'm exposed to what else is fake about you and I
00:14:35know it's not just your purse
00:14:38Why are you even defending her? She's the loser who has nude photos for random men
00:14:43And he's got more personality than all of you combined and if you mess with her you mess with me.
00:14:48You hear me?
00:14:53You hear me?
00:14:54You hear me?
00:14:54Cole is on my side now? Is he doing this to play with my feelings?
00:14:58I just need to be alone
00:14:59Alright
00:15:00Haley!
00:15:05Cole is a rich asshole and he said we were enemies
00:15:09But why did I get butterflies when he looked at me today?
00:15:15Don't stay up too late honey
00:15:17Love you mom
00:15:19Wait mom
00:15:20Wait mom
00:15:24Do people change?
00:15:27Like can a spoiled brat somehow become nice?
00:15:34Well maybe just give them a second chance
00:15:47Wait mom
00:15:53Tough day huh?
00:15:55There's no more mozzarella sticks in the cafeteria
00:15:58They're my favorite
00:16:00Noted
00:16:00Is that all?
00:16:01The whole school treats me like I'm their punching bag
00:16:03I'm just trying to bring a little hope to my family and keep my scholarship
00:16:08Oh
00:16:09I'm really proud of you
00:16:11And then there's this guy
00:16:12He has this vendetta against me but at the same time he's super contradictory
00:16:17It's so confusing
00:16:18Sounds like you're into this guy
00:16:21Sounds like you're into this guy
00:16:22No, I'm not into this guy
00:16:24I like you
00:16:25Only you
00:16:32I really liked your photo by the way
00:16:33You did?
00:16:34Are you gonna risk for Kate?
00:16:36I was thinking it would be better if we met in person
00:16:38That sounds amazing
00:16:40When? Where?
00:16:41About after school
00:16:42At the balcony
00:16:43I'll bring flowers
00:16:44Deal?
00:16:54I'm about to meet my boyfriend
00:16:56I'm about to meet my boyfriend
00:17:05Stop thinking about Cole
00:17:15Army father
00:17:16I heard about you harassing Jen at school today
00:17:19Defending that nobody
00:17:21Haley girl
00:17:22He was not a nobody dad
00:17:23Are those for her?
00:17:29What the fuck?
00:17:33What the fuck?
00:17:34I know what Haley is Cole
00:17:36Her mother works as a maid at my office
00:17:39That whole family is trash
00:17:41Stay away from her
00:17:43And what if I say no?
00:17:44Stay away from Haley Cole
00:17:46Or I'll fire her mother
00:17:48What if she found out that you were the one making her life miserable?
00:17:51I'm almost 18
00:17:53I'm almost 18
00:17:53Soon I'll have my inheritance
00:17:54I hate to make Haley wait but
00:17:56She can't know who I am before I make sure her family is safe
00:18:01You're sick
00:18:04It's called watching out for your future
00:18:11Oh hi
00:18:13I'm Haley
00:18:14Yes
00:18:15Mmhmm
00:18:16So nice to meet you
00:18:18God
00:18:19I'd give anything just to hear her say my name
00:18:21But the moment she knows I lose her forever
00:18:26Thank you for the flowers
00:18:28You're so nice
00:18:33Guacamole wizard
00:18:35Fail
00:18:39Guacamole wizard
00:18:40Ew
00:18:42You're waiting for your stupid little secret boyfriend
00:18:45Pathetic
00:18:46Maybe he's married
00:18:47Or maybe he's fat
00:18:49And maybe he's sitting on his back video
00:18:53I don't want any more trouble
00:18:56Why is guacamole wizard still not here?
00:18:58Oh no we're not here to give you any trouble
00:19:00We just noticed that you didn't have any lunch
00:19:02And so we thought we would bring you a sandwich
00:19:07Eat it
00:19:20Call me
00:19:21So you think that you can just humiliate me
00:19:23In front of the entire school
00:19:26You're a maid's daughter
00:19:27So you can go ahead and eat trash
00:19:30Guacamole wizard
00:19:30Where are you?
00:19:32Oh and by the way
00:19:33Cole's not gonna come save you
00:19:35Because after all
00:19:36He's rich
00:19:37Like me
00:19:42I'm nothing like you
00:19:50Cole again?
00:19:51Why is he always here when I need help?
00:19:54Pick it up
00:19:55Cole we were kidding
00:19:57It's ketchup
00:19:58Pick that bloody thing up
00:20:01Pick that bloody thing up
00:20:04Take her you're gonna record this
00:20:13Didn't your dad tell you not to mess with Haley anymore?
00:20:15Don't think you have leverage here
00:20:17Cause I'll tell your mom how fucked up you are
00:20:20You're gonna hold that thing next to your face
00:20:22And do what I say
00:20:24I
00:20:25Will leave Haley alone
00:20:29I will leave Haley alone
00:20:35Got it?
00:20:36Yeah
00:20:36Let's go
00:20:38What are you looking at?
00:20:43Got it?
00:20:44Let's go
00:20:52Uh, thank you
00:20:54Wow
00:20:56Never thought I'd hear you say that
00:21:00Why do you keep following me around?
00:21:02I just
00:21:04I happen to see you
00:21:06Were you waiting at someone?
00:21:08Yeah
00:21:09My boyfriend actually
00:21:13Well, he
00:21:14He kind of stood me up, so
00:21:16Maybe you didn't do it on purpose
00:21:20Maybe you gotta do it nice today
00:21:22Cole, are you being nice to me?
00:21:26You thought we were enemies
00:21:28I mean, I still find you incredibly annoying though
00:21:30I'm not that annoying
00:21:32Maybe you'll like me once you realize I have layers
00:21:35Are you trying to play with my feelings, Cole Edna?
00:21:37Cause it's not gonna work
00:21:38I'm like those stupid, spoiled heiresses
00:21:46How'd that online boyfriend in your ears make you fall for her?
00:21:53He...
00:21:53He makes me feel safe
00:21:56You wouldn't understand it though
00:22:02I understand better than you think
00:22:05Cole understands me better than I think
00:22:09Does he...
00:22:11How you touch him like this?
00:22:22If you keep staring, I'm gonna think you like what you see
00:22:26No, my...
00:22:28My boyfriend has way better abs than you do
00:22:33In the game
00:22:36Oh, in the game, huh?
00:22:43Why does he have to smell so good?
00:22:49Are you that slow on the game too?
00:22:53I can see why he likes you
00:23:04I can't do this
00:23:07I love my boyfriend
00:23:08And you will never understand that
00:23:10He's smart and he's kind
00:23:12And he loves me for who I am
00:23:16That is so much more important to me than whatever this is between us
00:23:20I wish I could just tell her right now
00:23:30I wish I could just tell her right now
00:23:30Wait, it couldn't be
00:23:34Cole, what was that notification on your phone?
00:23:39There's nothing
00:23:40Cole, who are you?
00:23:44What was that notification on your phone?
00:23:46It was my dad telling me my car got done getting waxed
00:23:51Champagne problems, huh?
00:23:54You live such a tough life
00:24:00What was I thinking?
00:24:01We are from two different worlds
00:24:03He just wants to play with me
00:24:05But why did I want to kiss him so badly?
00:24:12Why didn't you come to school today?
00:24:14I got into a car accident
00:24:16Really? Are you okay?
00:24:18You have to keep me in the hospital till prom
00:24:20He was right
00:24:21Who?
00:24:22Nobody
00:24:23Which hospital are you staying at?
00:24:24I want to come visit you
00:24:26No, you can't
00:24:27I look miserable now
00:24:28You need to see me in style
00:24:30Fine, if you say so
00:24:33So, are we going to prom together?
00:24:35Hell yeah we are
00:24:41Why would anyone want to sit next to her?
00:24:44Whoever needs a charity case
00:25:02Oh, you
00:25:03Oh, me
00:25:04Why is she so lucky?
00:25:06Cole's never been this way with any other girl
00:25:09People think you're really lucky to be my lab partner
00:25:11I'm sure you feel really lucky to be my lab partner
00:25:14Because you don't do any homework
00:25:21You finished it?
00:25:23It's okay
00:25:24We'll get to know each other more
00:25:25I'm not that curious about you actually
00:25:27I'm curious about you though
00:25:30Like, how close were you with your mom?
00:25:33What is he trying to do?
00:25:35It's none of your business, but I'm very close with my mom
00:25:38I'd kill anyone who hurts her
00:25:42Does Cole genuinely want to know me?
00:25:54So, are you going to prom?
00:25:56I don't know
00:25:57So you have a date?
00:26:01Or shall I say victim?
00:26:03Are you jealous of me?
00:26:04No
00:26:04Me?
00:26:05Jealous?
00:26:06No, why would I be jealous?
00:26:07Oh, because I think you so secretly want me
00:26:10You are so full of yourself
00:26:12You can do this on your own
00:26:13Yeah
00:26:16No way
00:26:18It's a self-locking door
00:26:19Really?
00:26:21The score was going to be back in an hour
00:26:22I'm sure it'll be fine
00:26:23I'm stuck here with you for a full hour?
00:26:25I'm not
00:26:26Sorry, not by that bad
00:26:28I think maybe we can pick up where we left off
00:26:31Don't worry
00:26:32Maybe trust me too
00:26:34We're keeping our distance this time actually
00:26:36Yeah
00:26:46That was my first kiss
00:26:50My first kiss was not supposed to go like that
00:26:52It was supposed to be special at prom and not just bumping lips
00:27:07You're really good at this
00:27:09Why don't you regret it?
00:27:11You know
00:27:13We can do more if you want
00:27:22It's gonna be sudden
00:27:29Heyda, I've been home back a lot more than you think
00:27:32So you want me?
00:27:36I think you know much I want you
00:27:42Do you want me?
00:27:45I want you
00:27:51Oh shit
00:27:54anyone in here oh my god how long have you two been in here i really need to change this
00:28:02lock
00:28:02are you two okay oh yeah yeah we're good we're okay
00:28:15you're just going to pretend like that didn't happen what didn't happen hey wait it's just
00:28:20hormones jake can you still play after your accident relax i'm not dead wait car accident guacamole
00:28:29wizard i gotta go guacamole wizard huh
00:28:47are you all better after your car accident do i know you why is he being so standoffish is he
00:28:53trying to give me a surprise or he heard something about cole you're crushing your soda can
00:29:01she thinks guacamole wizard is jake myers she was in a real car accident and according to you
00:29:06someone's guacamole wizard cole wait oh what's up guys um we were just chatting chatting about jake's
00:29:22grand plans to kick balls was there something that you wanted cole hey just figured i'd bring you some
00:29:30mozzarella sticks they're your favorite right how did you know that tough day huh there's no more
00:29:38mozzarella sticks in the cafeteria they're my favorite he couldn't be cool could he
00:29:50the truth is um a dickhead
00:29:54what do you honestly get out of your bro you came to my table bro and knocked my ball away
00:30:05there it goes again cole is jealous we got a problem here cole we don't have a problem
00:30:11we don't have a problem right tell cole to get my ball and we don't have a problem
00:30:17jake it would take me forever to find one of your balls
00:30:22i have the ball now can we stop measuring each other's dicks
00:30:27cole and jake are fighting over hayley maybe i can use that
00:30:34jake hey what if i told you that i have an internship opportunity for you with my dad wait
00:30:40seriously yeah just one little catch you have to pretend to like hallie raw
00:30:47all right you have the rest of the period to work on your lab reports if you have any questions
00:30:52i'll be at my desk i thought guacamole wizard would feel more like cole but if he's really jake
00:30:59then maybe this was always going to end you've literally been sorry for five minutes i'm thinking
00:31:04about the report or about him why are you making it so weird about jake we literally made out of
00:31:09sojourn maybe maybe i've known jake longer no you don't how do you know that you're going to
00:31:15prom with someone else stop acting like you're serious about me you have no idea
00:31:25oh my god is jake asking me to prom
00:31:41hey lee someone's here to see you
00:31:54are you asking me to prom too cheesy no it's cute the accident the mozzarella sticks
00:32:04he is guacamole wizard so um what do you think you want to go to prom with me
00:32:10i i should feel happy but why does this feel so wrong hey can we not
00:32:20hey can we not dude seriously what is your problem my problem here dude is that me and my lab
00:32:27partner
00:32:27have work to do and you're out here to strike me with bad puns wow that is some weak
00:32:33shit man oh that's weak shit is this weak
00:32:39oh my god
00:32:47wow wow he's got really pretty eyes
00:32:55wait i can't colt put me down put me down put me down don't do that again
00:33:15new couple alert
00:33:18fuck off jen why do you hate me so much cool you and i we're not that different and if
00:33:23you'd realize
00:33:24and give me a chance i think that we would make a great match like say if you asked me
00:33:29to prom i might say yes
00:33:34jen you want to go to prom with me jen you want to go to prom with me we're both
00:33:41hot and we're both rich
00:33:42and our dads have been in business like forever so how romantic i think i'll pass
00:33:50you're gonna regret this cole edmunds
00:33:55here they come
00:33:58if i message corkamoly wizard i wonder if jake's phone were ding
00:34:03what should we wear to prom and the dean's list
00:34:15um i'll talk to you later i'll see your own school okay okay yeah i'll see you later bye
00:34:20he's so different maybe he's still recovering from the accident
00:34:24you're gonna say we're
00:34:26hayley
00:34:31oh
00:34:35geez
00:34:42here i'll get it
00:34:44here we go
00:34:49oh you're scared of me seeing all the girls in your phone
00:34:52i don't care i do care
00:34:56here we are
00:35:13i don't put a problem jake
00:35:15i mean he only knows you like mozzarella sticks because of me he doesn't even know you
00:35:19and you do how do you know i like mozzarella sticks that's something i've only ever talked
00:35:23because i pay attention to what you like i noticed it at lunch the first day
00:35:32you were watching me
00:35:34just don't go to college
00:35:50move
00:35:52cole is talking to hayley again your job is to keep them away from each other jake unless you don't
00:35:58want that internship that my dad got you obviously i do okay then break them up idiot
00:36:03uh what do i do i do i've got a few ideas
00:36:13hey look
00:36:16someone will take you to prom all right i promise yeah really like who i mean the whole school hates
00:36:21me except for jake and you but you're not asking me
00:36:28hey oh hey jake hey how um i just wanted to thank you again for the other night
00:36:37the other night yeah it was
00:36:40so sexy you're so sexy jake what are you talking about
00:36:49hey i hate to break it to you asshole but she's my prom date
00:36:57and she's a real tiger in the pet room
00:36:59oh
00:37:01oh my god
00:37:19Stop, guys! Stop it! Stop! Stop!
00:37:23What the hell is going on over there?
00:37:27Shit, it's Principal Stevens. I've got to save Cole. I mean, Jake. I've got to save Jake.
00:37:38Oh my god! Principal Stevens, I'm so sorry!
00:37:42Hailey Rock, that's detention. After school, don't be late.
00:38:02Cole, what are you doing here?
00:38:05Can we keep you company?
00:38:07It's the least I could do if you saved my ass today.
00:38:12The locker thing, that was an accident.
00:38:14Oh, sure.
00:38:17So, uh, you and Jake, huh?
00:38:21No.
00:38:23He lied about that. I don't know why though.
00:38:26Good.
00:38:29Father that asshole, every time he looks at you makes me sick to my stomach.
00:38:33Thinking about him touching you, kissing you.
00:38:36I could kill him.
00:38:40Promise me you won't go to prom with it.
00:38:45Okay, fine. I won't.
00:38:49Because I want to go to prom with you.
00:38:54Okay, everyone, let's start off by mixing our sodium bicarbonate.
00:39:04Oh my god, I am so fed up with this.
00:39:09No.
00:39:25No.
00:39:25No.
00:39:26I tripped.
00:39:28No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
00:39:29Jet!
00:39:30What?
00:39:30It always has to be about her, doesn't it?
00:39:36They're dead.
00:39:37They're both dead.
00:39:39Oh.
00:39:40How am I going to be able to talk to guacamole wizard?
00:39:45Oh.
00:39:46What are you, are you almost crying?
00:39:49It's probably because you can't afford a new one.
00:39:53Jen, what's going on over there?
00:40:06What's going on is Jen is getting a taste of her own medicine.
00:40:09This squirm is burning.
00:40:10Mr. Edmonds.
00:40:11Oh, please. It's baking soda and water. You're fine.
00:40:14Detention. Today after school.
00:40:17Shit.
00:40:29Jake, hey.
00:40:31Oh, uh, sorry.
00:40:32Gotta get to student council.
00:40:36Hey, you didn't even try the rice trick.
00:40:39The rice trick?
00:40:42Yeah.
00:40:44You don't know about the...
00:40:47Come on.
00:41:00Hey.
00:41:01Um, Ella.
00:41:03It's Emma.
00:41:05Yeah, that's what I said.
00:41:06Can you hack a broken laptop?
00:41:16Hey, it's gonna be okay.
00:41:19We'll pour out in a few more minutes and it'll be like the whole thing never happened.
00:41:22No, it's not just the phone or the laptop. It means, it means I can't...
00:41:28Can't what?
00:41:31I talked to a friend online.
00:41:34He's really important to me.
00:41:39And I'm sure you're really important to him.
00:41:52You know, Cole, if you look past all that hair gel and...
00:41:57Big ol' ego and...
00:41:59Okay, okay. I-I get it.
00:42:04You're kind of sweet.
00:42:09Hey, look at that.
00:42:12Oh my god.
00:42:15Oh my god.
00:42:17You're a miracle worker.
00:42:24Ugh, what is taking so long?
00:42:26You doused this thing in sodium bicarbonate.
00:42:28Shut up, Ella.
00:42:30It's Emma.
00:42:31Whatever.
00:42:37Oh my god.
00:42:45Oh, morning, valley whore!
00:42:48How are things in the castle?
00:42:55Valley whore?
00:42:56What are they talking about?
00:43:12Guacamole wizard, when can we be together in person?
00:43:16Guacamole wizard, I want you so badly I dream about you touching me.
00:43:20Oh my god, someone hacked my castle claimers messages.
00:43:23Touch me, guacamole wizard.
00:43:26Yeah.
00:43:27Hey, valley whore.
00:43:28Show them what you really like.
00:43:29Oh my god.
00:43:47Here you go.
00:43:49Here, this is for you.
00:43:54Oh, do you like what I've done with the place?
00:43:56You hacked my laptop?
00:43:59Oh no, it wasn't me.
00:44:00It was that kid, Ella.
00:44:02But I definitely gotta reap the benefits.
00:44:04What kind of incel sex over a video game, Hayley?
00:44:07What are you, catfishing this guy?
00:44:09No, I'm not trying to catfish him.
00:44:11Hey everyone, I think valley whore's a catfish.
00:44:15Because who in their right mind would spend their time thirsting over you?
00:44:20Go.
00:44:48I thought I'd said the janitor's in time.
00:44:53Jake!
00:44:55Hey!
00:44:57Now's the time.
00:44:58Tell them.
00:45:00Tell them what?
00:45:00That you're a guacamole wizard.
00:45:04Who's guacamole wizard?
00:45:07Here you go.
00:45:10Oh, my God.
00:45:11Did you think that Jake was your secret little online boyfriend?
00:45:14Oh, sweetie, I've been bribing him this whole time to pretend to like you.
00:45:18What?
00:45:19Why would you do that?
00:45:20Oh, I don't know, Cole.
00:45:21Why do you think I would do that?
00:45:25Jake, is this true?
00:45:26Have you been pretending to like me this whole time?
00:45:30Sorry.
00:45:31It was nothing personal?
00:45:38Yeah, nothing personal.
00:45:40Oh!
00:45:42Oh!
00:45:44Oh!
00:45:45Oh!
00:45:46Oh!
00:45:47Okay, all right, all right.
00:45:48Enough!
00:45:49What in the world is going on here?
00:45:51Is that a leaf blower?
00:45:53That's all him.
00:45:54Okay, well, you both have detention, so...
00:46:01Let me get this straight.
00:46:03You stole a leaf blower and defaced school property.
00:46:06It wasn't school property, Dad.
00:46:08It was Jen's cyber boy's spreadsheets.
00:46:10Jesus Christ, how does she always get away with this shit?
00:46:13Could it be because her father's running for Senate, Cole?
00:46:16You think that's what it could be?
00:46:17Who cares?
00:46:18I care.
00:46:20And I hear she's got an eye for you.
00:46:23So you're taking her to prom.
00:46:25What?
00:46:25Over my dead body.
00:46:27Oh, because you're like that Haley girl?
00:46:30I'm firing her mother right now.
00:46:32No, no, please don't.
00:46:33Please.
00:46:34Then you're taking Jen to prom.
00:46:36Max's dad called.
00:46:37He said he's having a party tomorrow.
00:46:39You're gonna go and you're gonna ask Jen to prom.
00:46:42End of discussion.
00:46:49Come on, you big coward.
00:46:51Message him.
00:46:52Just do it, just do it.
00:46:56You must think I'm the biggest idiot.
00:47:05I could never think that.
00:47:12But I thought you were Jake.
00:47:14Please, can't you just tell me now?
00:47:15I think I've had enough public humiliation for one lifetime.
00:47:22I heard that guy Max is throwing a party tomorrow.
00:47:24If you want, I'll meet you there.
00:47:37Okay.
00:47:39You got this Haley.
00:47:40Just take a deep breath.
00:47:42You got this.
00:47:43You got this.
00:47:47You look beautiful.
00:47:51Thank you, Mom.
00:48:10Hey, Haley.
00:48:12I'm glad you came.
00:48:13You look so pretty.
00:48:14Hi.
00:48:15Hey, Max.
00:48:16Your house is gorgeous.
00:48:18I mean.
00:48:18No, it's just my parents' blood, honey.
00:48:20You know they're upstairs watching The Last of Us right now?
00:48:22They don't care about shit.
00:48:23Get drunk, girl.
00:48:25Woo!
00:48:28Yeah.
00:48:38What are you doing here?
00:48:40What are you doing here?
00:48:41Valley whore?
00:48:43Looks like the catfish came out of the pond.
00:48:45Hey, everyone.
00:48:46Let's give it up for Valley whore.
00:48:48Valley whore!
00:48:53Jen, why are you doing this?
00:48:54What have I even done to you?
00:48:56To me?
00:48:56Oh, I'm actually concerned about our whole community because those little cringy messages on your
00:49:01castle game, those are concerning.
00:49:04Actually, kind of a little bit of a perv.
00:49:06Did you know that?
00:49:07Hailey?
00:49:08She's a little pervy princess.
00:49:10Pervy princess!
00:49:13Pervy princess!
00:49:14Pervy princess!
00:49:16Pervy princess!
00:49:18Pervy princess!
00:49:18Pervy princess!
00:49:19Let's get pervy tonight.
00:49:21Leave me alone.
00:49:23What?
00:49:24Is there a fire?
00:49:25Okay, we set off the alarm.
00:49:39Tau!
00:49:40Was that kind?
00:49:44Is there a fire?
00:49:49Oh.
00:49:55Corn Daddy!
00:49:56Suppose we let it show and by at night...
00:49:56Oh, got that army left!
00:49:57Loooooo!
00:49:59So we hit our habitat!
00:50:00Oh!
00:50:00Do you needŃĐžĐŒett ez!
00:50:17are you him would you stop trying to find your stupid little cyber boyfriend okay cole is not
00:50:24him anyways we are going to the prom together no i'm not yes you are it's okay you can be
00:50:31honest about your feelings so you too this whole time oh my god i am such an idiot hey wait
00:50:43wait
00:50:49please at least take my jackets you know if you really wanted to humiliate me you didn't have to
00:50:53go to the extra effort jen was doing just fine i wasn't trying to humiliate you then what were you
00:50:58trying to do i guess you obviously the white clothes were just an added bonus i knew i
00:51:03shouldn't have trusted you now what about guacamole was it what are you
00:51:18who is that just the devil get in the car
00:51:26i'm not going to ask you again cole get in the car thank you just act normal for once and
00:51:31please
00:51:31introduce yourself to hayley i already assumed that's who this was i'm a servant so you're the
00:51:39scholarship trash that's hell bent on ruining cole's life well i've got news for you young lady my son
00:51:46is going to marry a good girl from a respectable family and that's not you you will be forgotten
00:51:53you're a maid's daughter and your mom works for me stay away from him or i swear to god your
00:52:01mother
00:52:01is fire dad stop don't you touch my family i'll stay away hey come on you don't mean that
00:52:12i hate everything you stand for i hate your greed and your callousness and your elitist ideas of what
00:52:19you think a good person looks like i hate everything about you i hate all of it i don't want
00:52:26any part
00:52:26of it so cole go with your dad hayley
00:52:40no laptop and no phone for a week ever since mom died you've turned into this co-patriarch hey
00:52:46we're not that's real love why do you have to make me so miserable i promised your mother i would
00:52:51make you a success son even if it meant saving you from yourself
00:53:03hi hayley i'm emma i know you are right i just felt kind of bad that i accidentally helped
00:53:10and ruin your life so i wanted to return your laptop to you good as new
00:53:20oh wow thanks emma okay bye
00:53:29one down one to go you're so cool i know emma want to go to prom why not let's get
00:53:38these
00:53:38lovebirds together
00:53:44hi mr edmund hi max and max's friend sorry we weren't expecting you cole's grounded
00:53:51oh he is but it was his 18th birthday today what can i say max actions have consequences
00:53:59birthday or no cole is grounded well that really sucks because he's uh also the president of the
00:54:07prom committee we were supposed to review budgets today cole my son cole reviewing budgets he's never
00:54:16reviewed a budget a day in his life well mr edmunds today could be that day and we just have
00:54:20to give
00:54:20him back this school sanctioned laptop so we can get back to his very important and very respectable
00:54:25budgetary work
00:54:35go away
00:54:40max what what are you guys doing here happy birthday cole i brought you my laptop and logged into your
00:54:46castle
00:54:46claimers account just get it back to me by tomorrow what what's going on dude it's your 18th birthday
00:54:53you can tell haley who you are now you can be together just log into this stupid game and tell
00:54:57the girl who you love you really are no i'll tell her myself stick me in your car
00:55:10welcome to the wizard
00:55:14mom i'm fine i just need some time alone
00:55:25open the door wait what he's here
00:55:37it's you
00:55:39i should have given you this to you a long time
00:55:43hey we have wanted to tell you who i was from the bitter beginning
00:55:46my dad threatened off all your mom and i had to wait a really long time to tell you who
00:55:51i was
00:55:51i got my inheritance and i can protect you and your family and so you don't have to choose
00:56:09i understand if this changes things if you don't love me the way you love guacamole wizard but
00:56:19look i need you to know i love you
00:56:32cool i love you
00:56:34you do
00:56:36yes you idiot
00:56:38i've loved you for months
00:56:39yes i mean this whole guacamole wizard thing was so confusing though
00:56:43because i had to be loyal to him and
00:56:47but you're him
00:56:48you didn't expect her
00:56:50i i mean i i always hoped it was you
00:56:55i do hope to
00:56:58yes i hoped it was you
00:56:59you were always there for me
00:57:04you're hot and
00:57:06you're really fucking hot
00:57:11hey uh
00:57:12one of those things i said we could do
00:57:16here we go
00:57:18yeah
00:57:21take my clothes off
00:57:22you're getting there don't worry
00:57:45okay so what do you think
00:57:4810 out of 10
00:57:50yeah would do again
00:57:52i'll get sex with sex with me specifically
00:57:54i've only ever had sex with you specifically
00:57:58all right
00:57:58all right that's fair
00:57:59i'll uh
00:58:01i'll take that as a one
00:58:07what is my life now
00:58:08am i being nice to cole eggnance
00:58:11oh god now i fully expect you to
00:58:14continue to berate me endlessly
00:58:17now i'll just
00:58:18i'll just lust behind it
00:58:20there's always been lust behind it
00:58:21i'll take a minute now
00:58:22stop it
00:58:26um
00:58:28same
00:58:29isn't promenade
00:58:31i think you know if it's prom or not
00:58:34i don't know
00:58:36but the real question is
00:58:37do you got a date
00:58:40cole are you asking me to prom
00:58:42oh i would have asked you earlier
00:58:45but jay kind of gave me to the show
00:58:46oh god please don't mention his name again
00:58:48i don't want to hear it
00:58:49yeah you don't have to ask me twice
00:58:51but i don't even have a dress
00:58:54later
00:58:59i just slept with cole edmonds
00:59:01and i'm in love with cole edmonds
00:59:03who would have guessed
00:59:07i thought
00:59:09only the best for my princess
00:59:11where did you get that
00:59:14i might have gotten you a dress
00:59:16on the off chance that you
00:59:19might have wanted to go to prom with me
00:59:20and maybe had nothing to wear
00:59:24of course they'll go to prom with you
00:59:31mr edmonds
00:59:32i didn't expect you to be here
00:59:34cole
00:59:34are you here
00:59:36cole
00:59:37are you here
00:59:40mr edmonds
00:59:40you can't just barge into my house like this
00:59:43i see you cole
00:59:43you are a big pro
01:00:01hey uh
01:00:03you almost done in there
01:00:04you try changing into an evening gown
01:00:06in a bunch of thorny bushes
01:00:10okay i'm ready
01:00:22what do you think
01:00:26my god hayley you are the most beautiful thing i have ever seen
01:00:33i just hunched over in a car mirror to do this lipstick
01:00:36you're not messing it up for at least 20 minutes
01:00:3820 minutes
01:00:40we're in
01:00:41no deal
01:00:45thank you all for using the prom voting site to cast your votes i hear we have a winner
01:00:53and your 2026 prom queen is
01:00:58jen longfellow
01:01:00thank you guys so much
01:01:06seriously this makes the world to me
01:01:08i mean like who else would win right
01:01:11oh this is just the perfect moment
01:01:17oh my god that's hayley and cole
01:01:21it was fine
01:01:23sis where's your dad
01:01:24yes
01:01:28hey or uh
01:01:29most time that's up
01:01:31no
01:01:31but who cares
01:01:35hell yeah
01:01:39ew literally what the fuck
01:01:41damn language
01:01:42i am the queen okay
01:01:44she's just a little pervy princess
01:01:46come on
01:01:47everyone say it with me
01:01:48pervy princess
01:01:50pervy princess
01:01:51pervy princess
01:01:56pervy princess
01:01:56wait wait wait wait what are those those are texts between me and my dad
01:02:01make cole edmunds fall in love with you his dad's month is essential to funding my campaign
01:02:08hey don't worry daddy if i can't have no one can i'm gonna destroy hayley roth's life is this real
01:02:18jen's crazy
01:02:20jen's crazy
01:02:21who did this who did this
01:02:26what you exploited me for a hacking job and didn't think i was gonna hack your phone you little skit
01:02:32you know jen
01:02:33you know jen as the principal i'm supposed to remain impartial and above all of this petty drama
01:02:41but quite frankly you are the worst and i think it's time that you are expelled from edmunds academy
01:02:49you can't do that
01:02:50you can't do that
01:02:51i'm the principal so uh yes i can
01:02:59you can't do that
01:03:00you can't do that
01:03:00you can't do that
01:03:02oh my god
01:03:02there was no winter chick
01:03:04you lied to me
01:03:06you lied to me
01:03:22Now all I need is my handsome prince.
01:03:24Oh.
01:03:25Yeah, no can do.
01:03:27All I have to offer is a lowly night with a chip on his shoulder and an awesome sense of
01:03:33humor.
01:03:33Oh, how can I refuse?
01:03:41Oh, no, that's my dad.
01:03:45We are going home right now.
01:03:48You disobeyed me for the last time, boy.
01:03:50Yeah, I'm not a boy, dad.
01:03:53You talk all the time about wanting a man that's worthy of the family last name.
01:03:57Yet, you can't see I've already become that man.
01:04:01And it's because of Hayley.
01:04:03And you can accept that, or I'll make my own path.
01:04:05And best believe me, I can.
01:04:08I'll say this.
01:04:10That's the most backbone I've ever seen in you, Cole.
01:04:15Joy Pro.
01:04:23I am so proud of you.
01:04:26I can't have done it without you being by my son.
01:04:29That was terrifying.
01:04:31It's not like we haven't slayed a dragon before, well, so...
01:04:36I love you, Viala Queen.
01:04:37I love you, guacamole wizard.
01:04:39Oh, my God, I gotta change that username.
01:04:41Yeah, you do.
01:04:42Hey.
01:04:42Well, I love you.
01:04:45Come on.
01:04:55You
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