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Short filmTranscript
00:00:02New intimacy level unlocked.
00:00:09New skin dangerously hot is equipped.
00:00:18You're staring. You like what you see?
00:00:21Maybe.
00:00:30When are you going to tell my hero you are?
00:00:31You know who I really am. I'm Valleyqueen33.
00:00:35Such a dumb username.
00:00:37Oh, okay, guacamolewizard275.
00:00:39Don't talk to me about dumb usernames.
00:00:41You know, you're lucky you're cute.
00:00:43You don't even know what I look like.
00:00:45Well, I would if you agreed to meet me in person.
00:00:47Or at least a photo.
00:00:50Maybe someday.
00:00:55Crap, I'm late.
00:00:57Good luck, scholarship queen.
00:01:01Who needs luck when I have my talisman to remind me of my knight?
00:01:08In the game of castle claimers,
00:01:10I might be a warrior princess in love with a dashing knight.
00:01:13But on my first day at Edmunds Academy,
00:01:16I feel like a peasant.
00:01:19Watch it! This isn't public school.
00:01:23Forget your training wheels.
00:01:26At least I have my knight's charm to help me get through the day.
00:01:40Stop, stop, stop, stop the car!
00:01:44No!
00:01:46God, my knight's special talisman!
00:01:48It's ruined!
00:01:56He's so hot.
00:01:57Hey! I told you to stop the car!
00:02:04Oh my gosh, it's cold!
00:02:06He's so hot.
00:02:10Hey!
00:02:12What is wrong with you?
00:02:14Didn't you see me yelling and screaming for you to stop the car?
00:02:17Okay, I see you now, new girl.
00:02:19What are you with me, son?
00:02:21What are you talking about?
00:02:22Why?
00:02:24I thought you were one of my fans.
00:02:26No, I'm not one of your fans.
00:02:30You just broke something that's really important to me.
00:02:32Yeah, I broke a lot of hearts, buttercup.
00:02:35Okay?
00:02:37You should know that.
00:02:39I don't know who you are, but you were a...
00:02:42You were a...
00:02:45Asshole!
00:02:51Alright.
00:02:52I broke something of yours.
00:02:54Sure, but...
00:02:55Hey!
00:02:57You got my attention.
00:03:00So, in that case, we're even.
00:03:07Don't do it, Hayley.
00:03:10Have a good day.
00:03:13Don't do it!
00:03:15I got a hot mess, energy.
00:03:18Hey!
00:03:19Oh, fuck!
00:03:23Now we're even.
00:03:25My laptop better not be broken!
00:03:27I can't lose my connection to Valley Queen.
00:03:34You just made the wrong enemy.
00:03:37You just made the wrong enemy.
00:03:40I'm going to make every classroom,
00:03:43every hallway, and every rumor in this school your personal nightmare.
00:03:49I'm going to make your wife a living hell.
00:03:52What's going on?
00:03:53Cole's fighting the new girl.
00:03:54Now Cole's leaving the new girl.
00:03:56Yeah, idiot.
00:03:57I can see that.
00:04:00I just met an unhinged person.
00:04:02Good thing the universe balances it with you.
00:04:05Same.
00:04:05Ran into a certified asshole.
00:04:08Can't wait to see you in the game tonight.
00:04:12Cole, do you need help?
00:04:13I can help you.
00:04:17The new girl poured coffee on him.
00:04:18This bitch thinks that she can just roll up and piss off Michael.
00:04:22But he's not your Cole.
00:04:23Shut up, Lindsey.
00:04:25He's not yet.
00:04:27Come on.
00:04:29Hi.
00:04:30I'm Jen.
00:04:31And this is Lindsey.
00:04:33Hi.
00:04:34I'm Hailey.
00:04:35So nice to meet you.
00:04:37You have first day jitters.
00:04:38It's totally understandable.
00:04:39We want to make sure you feel really welcome.
00:04:41And so we'll take you to your locker.
00:04:43Come in.
00:04:44Bye there.
00:04:45Let's go.
00:04:49There you go.
00:04:51Thanks so much.
00:04:59Oh!
00:05:01That's so good.
00:05:13Aw, you're welcome, new girl.
00:05:15Honestly, it's kind of an improvement on your face.
00:05:23Guacamole wizard.
00:05:25Wow.
00:05:25What are you, catfishing some little lonely online gamer boy?
00:05:29Give it back.
00:05:30Hold on.
00:05:33Hey, if you go to Edmunds Academy, you should come to Locker 83 right now.
00:05:37Send.
00:05:38Here.
00:05:38Now your little gamer friend can see your ugly little face.
00:05:43So when can I meet the hero who ruined your billionaire shirt?
00:05:46I'm your friend first, Max. At least check on me.
00:05:49Oh, is it the online level?
00:05:51Ah, chill, please.
00:05:55No way.
00:05:57What is it?
00:05:58Oh, that would clean goes to the school.
00:06:00Cool.
00:06:05Please ignore that.
00:06:07Someone stole my phone and played a stupid prank.
00:06:09Send.
00:06:14What is wrong with you?
00:06:15You mess with Cole Edmunds and you're gonna mess with me.
00:06:18Edmunds?
00:06:19What?
00:06:20You don't know that his family owns the whole school?
00:06:23Wow.
00:06:23You really did crawl out of the gutter, didn't you?
00:06:27Stop recording me!
00:06:30Jen is a new girl.
00:06:32Jen is a new girl.
00:06:33Is the new girl...
00:06:35Valley Queen?
00:06:37There's no way the new girl is Valley Queen.
00:06:40Could it be...
00:06:41Jen?
00:06:44Ew.
00:06:47Your enemy is our enemy, Cole.
00:06:49And I just made sure that the new girl knows that.
00:06:52No chances, Jen.
00:06:54So is it.
00:06:56She does look kinda cute.
00:07:00Even I can feel the tension in the room.
00:07:03But we're into...
00:07:04Please ignore that.
00:07:06Someone stole my phone and played a stupid prank.
00:07:09What was I thinking?
00:07:10Of course she's not my online lover.
00:07:16Hey there, buttercup.
00:07:17Keep walking, Hayley.
00:07:19Just keep walking.
00:07:20You got a problem with shaving this morning, or...?
00:07:24My name's Hayley.
00:07:26Wow. Hayley.
00:07:27I think you, uh...
00:07:29You used to spell on your upper lip right there.
00:07:33What a coincidence!
00:07:35So did you!
00:07:36Oh, no!
00:07:39Oh, I'm sorry.
00:07:40I forgot you don't even need shaving cream.
00:07:43You're just a man-child with follicle issues.
00:07:49Whoever ends up with her must have failed an eye exam.
00:08:04I was so relieved to see you.
00:08:06Something happened today.
00:08:07I lost the game, I thought I'd never see you again.
00:08:10I think it's time we call this what it is.
00:08:13And what is this?
00:08:15What I think it is, is...
00:08:17I want to be with you, and you want to be with me.
00:08:22As more than just friends.
00:08:24Oh, thank God.
00:08:26I honestly want that more than anything.
00:08:27You're my soulmate.
00:08:29Like, I like you so much.
00:08:30Okay, well, since we're dating now, um...
00:08:34I'm ready to send my photo.
00:08:36Wait, really?
00:08:38Yeah.
00:08:39Get ready.
00:08:45Okay.
00:08:46No face.
00:08:48Just the boobs.
00:08:49Is it a bad idea?
00:08:51But all my online friends said it's cool.
00:08:53PG-13 nudes are harmless.
00:08:55All the kids do this.
00:08:57You'll love it.
00:09:02Ugh, this lighting hates me.
00:09:04Come on, Hayley.
00:09:05Confidence.
00:09:06You literally fight dragons online.
00:09:13Okay.
00:09:14Okay.
00:09:14Yeah.
00:09:15That's actually kind of...
00:09:16Oh, my God.
00:09:22Seriously?
00:09:23Hello?
00:09:24Anyone?
00:09:26Don't look at me!
00:09:31Don't look at me!
00:09:32We're trying not for viable, are we?
00:09:33I don't think you're supposed to do it like that.
00:09:36Get out.
00:09:37Now.
00:09:37Fine.
00:09:38Ow!
00:09:40Damn it!
00:09:44Come on.
00:10:18You're helping me.
00:10:19Yeah, well, I didn't point on it, but here we are.
00:10:28Excuse you.
00:10:29These boobs are for someone else.
00:10:31I don't have a boyfriend, do we?
00:10:32That is shocking.
00:10:34Yeah, actually.
00:10:35And he'd probably kill you right now if he saw you were flirting with me.
00:10:38Flirting?
00:10:39Yeah, don't flatter yourself.
00:10:40I've got a girlfriend too.
00:10:41My thoughts and prayers to her.
00:10:42Funny.
00:10:43Funny.
00:10:44Okay, well, can we just pretend this didn't happen and go our separate ways?
00:10:48Fine by me.
00:10:51Okay.
00:10:52Oh, no.
00:10:54Oh, no.
00:10:54I love the purple bra, by the way.
00:10:56I like it in a weird way.
00:10:57You're not even my type, but, you know, power theory, or whatever.
00:11:01Would you just get out of here?
00:11:11Hopefully, Quacamole Wizard will like it too.
00:11:15Jen, red alert.
00:11:17Cole and the new girl are for sure flirting.
00:11:19I think it's time to take drastic action.
00:11:24Don't be a coward.
00:11:25Just send it.
00:11:26Jen.
00:11:31Oh, my God.
00:11:33Here goes nothing.
00:11:41Still no response?
00:11:43Don't freak out.
00:11:43He's probably just busy.
00:11:48Give it back.
00:11:49Why?
00:11:50You don't want me to see your slutty little nude?
00:11:53Oh, this is actually a really good photo.
00:11:55Honestly, it's so good that I think the whole school should see it.
00:11:58Hmm.
00:11:59Did you get it, Lindsay?
00:11:59Mm-hmm.
00:12:00Got it.
00:12:03What are you doing?
00:12:15Oh, my God.
00:12:18Oh, my God.
00:12:20Oh, my God.
00:12:34What was going on?
00:12:35Dude, your enemies nude just got put up on the big screen.
00:12:37What?
00:12:37Yeah.
00:12:52Come on, let's see if these builds are photoshopped.
00:12:58Stop, delete it, please, delete it.
00:13:11Oh my brave knight, I wish you were here with me right now.
00:13:19Oh my god.
00:13:21Oh cool, your anime's kinda hot.
00:13:24Since you're so into slutty photos, why don't we just go ahead and go full nude?
00:13:31Jen, no.
00:13:32No, no, no, no, no, no Jen, stop, stop, stop, stop.
00:13:52My school enemy is my ally girlfriend?
00:13:54My friend?
00:13:56Get off of me!
00:13:59Stop it!
00:14:01Oh my god!
00:14:09Hey, you okay?
00:14:14Give that to me.
00:14:22Now give the phone back, Jen.
00:14:24What the hell, Cole?
00:14:25I thought you'd be happy.
00:14:31How does it feel, being exposed to the whole school?
00:14:34Not good, huh?
00:14:35Now if you don't delete it off your phone,
00:14:37I'm exposed to what else is fake about you.
00:14:39And I know it's not just your purse.
00:14:41Why are you even defending her?
00:14:43She's the loser who has nude photos for random men!
00:14:47Haley's got more personality than all of you combined.
00:14:49And if you mess with her, you mess with me.
00:14:52You hear me?
00:14:57Haley, are you?
00:14:57Cole is on my side now?
00:14:59Is he doing this to play with my feelings?
00:15:02I just need to be alone.
00:15:04Haley!
00:15:09Cole is a rich asshole.
00:15:11And he said we were enemies.
00:15:13But why did I get butterflies when he looked at me today?
00:15:19Don't stay up too late, honey.
00:15:21Love you, Mom.
00:15:24Wait, Mom.
00:15:29Do people change?
00:15:30Like, can a spoiled brat somehow become nice?
00:15:38Well, maybe just give them a second chance.
00:15:58Tough day, huh?
00:15:59There's no more mozzarella sticks in the cafeteria.
00:16:02They're my favorite.
00:16:04Noted. Is that all?
00:16:05The whole school treats me like I'm their punching bag.
00:16:08I'm just trying to bring a little hope to my family
00:16:10and keep my scholarship.
00:16:13I'm really proud of you.
00:16:15And then there's this guy.
00:16:17He has this vendetta against me, but at the same time
00:16:19he's super contradictory.
00:16:21It's so confusing.
00:16:23Sounds like you're into this guy.
00:16:26Sounds like you're into this guy.
00:16:27No, I'm not into this guy.
00:16:29I like you. Only you.
00:16:36I really liked your photo, by the way.
00:16:38You did?
00:16:39Are you gonna reciprocate?
00:16:41I was thinking it would be better if we met in person.
00:16:43That sounds amazing.
00:16:45When? Where?
00:16:46About after school.
00:16:47At the balcony.
00:16:48I'll bring followers.
00:16:50Deal.
00:16:59I'm about to meet my boyfriend.
00:17:11Stop thinking about Cole.
00:17:20Army father.
00:17:21I heard about you harassing Jen at school today.
00:17:24Defending that nobody.
00:17:26Haley girl.
00:17:27He's not a nobody, dad.
00:17:29Are those for her?
00:17:34What the fuck?
00:17:38What the fuck?
00:17:39I know what Haley is, Cole.
00:17:42Her mother works as a maid at my office.
00:17:45That whole family is trash.
00:17:47Stay away from her.
00:17:48And what if I say no?
00:17:49Stay away from Haley Cole.
00:17:51Or I'll fire her mother.
00:17:53What if she found out that you were the one making her life miserable?
00:17:57I'm almost 18.
00:17:58Soon I'll have my inheritance.
00:18:00I hate to make Haley wait, but...
00:18:02She can't know who I am before I make sure her family is safe.
00:18:07You're sick.
00:18:09It's called watching out for your future.
00:18:17Oh, hi.
00:18:18Hi.
00:18:19I'm Haley.
00:18:20Yes.
00:18:21Mm-hmm.
00:18:22So nice to meet you.
00:18:24God.
00:18:24I'd give anything just to hear her say my name.
00:18:27But the moment she knows, I lose her forever.
00:18:32Thank you for the flowers.
00:18:34You're so nice.
00:18:39Guacamole wizard.
00:18:40Fail.
00:18:45Guacamole wizard.
00:18:46Ew.
00:18:48You're waiting for your stupid little secret boyfriend?
00:18:51Pathetic.
00:18:52Maybe he's married.
00:18:53Or maybe he's fat.
00:18:55And maybe he's sitting on his back video.
00:18:58I don't want any more trouble.
00:19:02Why is Guacamole wizard still not here?
00:19:04Oh, no.
00:19:05We're not here to give you any trouble.
00:19:06We just noticed that you didn't have any lunch.
00:19:08And so we thought we would bring you a sandwich.
00:19:10Eat it.
00:19:18Ah!
00:19:24Shh.
00:19:25Call me.
00:19:27So you think that you can just humiliate me?
00:19:29In front of the entire school?
00:19:32You're a maid's daughter.
00:19:33So you can go ahead and eat trash.
00:19:36Guacamole wizard.
00:19:36Where are you?
00:19:38Oh, and by the way, Nicole's not gonna come save you.
00:19:41Because after all, he's rich.
00:19:43Like me.
00:19:48I'm nothing like you.
00:19:53Yeah, I'm nothing like you.
00:19:56Cole again?
00:19:58Why is he always here when I need help?
00:20:01Pick it up.
00:20:02Cole, we were kidding.
00:20:03It's ketchup.
00:20:04Pick that bloody thing up.
00:20:10Take out your phone and record this.
00:20:13Hey!
00:20:19Didn't your dad tell you not to mess with Haley anymore?
00:20:22Don't think you have leverage here.
00:20:23Cause I'll tell your mom how fucked up you are.
00:20:26You're gonna hold that thing next to your face
00:20:28and do what I say.
00:20:32I will leave Haley alone.
00:20:36I will leave Haley alone.
00:20:41Got it?
00:20:42Let's go.
00:20:44What are you looking at?
00:20:49Got it? Let's go.
00:20:58Uh, thank you.
00:21:01Wow.
00:21:03Never thought I'd hear you say that.
00:21:07Why do you keep following me around?
00:21:09I just...
00:21:11I happen to see you.
00:21:13Were you waiting at someone?
00:21:15Yeah. My boyfriend, actually.
00:21:20Well, he...
00:21:21He kind of stood me up, so...
00:21:23Maybe you didn't do it on purpose.
00:21:26Maybe you got into it nice today.
00:21:29Cole, are you being nice to me?
00:21:32You thought we were enemies.
00:21:34I mean, I still find you incredibly annoying, though, so...
00:21:37Not that annoying.
00:21:39Maybe you'll like me once you realize I have layers.
00:21:41Are you trying to play with my feelings, Cole Ednaz?
00:21:44Because it's not going to work.
00:21:45I'm like those stupid, spoiled heiresses.
00:21:53How'd that online boyfriend in your ears make you fall for her?
00:21:59He...
00:22:00He makes me feel safe.
00:22:02You wouldn't understand it, though.
00:22:08You understand better than you think.
00:22:11Cole understands me better than I think.
00:22:16I don't see how you touch him like this.
00:22:30If you keep staring, I'm going to think you like what you see.
00:22:33No, no, my boyfriend has way better abs than you do.
00:22:40In the game.
00:22:42Oh, in the game, huh?
00:22:50Why does he have to smell so good?
00:22:56Are you a little slow in the game, too?
00:23:00I can see why he likes you.
00:23:11I can't do this.
00:23:14I love my boyfriend.
00:23:15And you will never understand that.
00:23:17He's smart, and he's kind, and he loves me for who I am.
00:23:23That is so much more important to me than whatever this is between us.
00:23:27I wish I could just tell her right now.
00:23:37Wait.
00:23:38It couldn't be.
00:23:41Cole, what was that notification on your phone?
00:23:46There's nothing.
00:23:47Cole, who are you?
00:23:52What was that notification on your phone?
00:23:54It was my dad telling me my car got done getting waxed.
00:23:58Champagne problems, huh?
00:24:01You live such a tough life.
00:24:07What was I thinking?
00:24:09We are from two different worlds.
00:24:10He just wants to play with me.
00:24:12But why did I want to kiss him so badly?
00:24:19Why didn't you come to school today?
00:24:22I got into a car accident.
00:24:24Really?
00:24:24Are you okay?
00:24:25You have to keep me in the hospital till prom.
00:24:27He was right.
00:24:29Who?
00:24:29Nobody.
00:24:30Which hospital are you staying at?
00:24:32I want to come visit you.
00:24:33No, no, you can't.
00:24:34I look miserable now.
00:24:36You need to see me in style.
00:24:38Fine, if you say so.
00:24:40So, are we going to prom together?
00:24:43Hell yeah, we are.
00:24:49Why would anyone want to sit next to her?
00:24:52Whoever needs a charity case.
00:25:09Oh, you.
00:25:11Oh, me.
00:25:12Why is she so lucky?
00:25:14Cole's never been this way with any other girl.
00:25:17People think you're really lucky to be my lab partner.
00:25:20I'm sure you feel really lucky to be my lab partner.
00:25:22Because you don't do any homework.
00:25:29You finished it?
00:25:31It's okay.
00:25:32We'll get you know each other more.
00:25:34I'm not that curious about you, actually.
00:25:35I'm curious about you, though.
00:25:37Like, uh, how close are you with your mom?
00:25:41What is he trying to do?
00:25:43It's none of your business, but I'm very close with my mom.
00:25:46I'd kill anyone who hurts her.
00:25:50Does Cole genuinely want to know me?
00:26:02So, are you going to prom?
00:26:04Eh, I did a well.
00:26:05I don't know.
00:26:06So, you have a date.
00:26:09Or shall I say victim?
00:26:11Are you jealous of me?
00:26:12Me?
00:26:13Jealous?
00:26:14No, why would I be jealous?
00:26:16Oh, because I think you so secretly want me.
00:26:18You are so full of yourself.
00:26:20You can do this on your own.
00:26:22Yeah.
00:26:24No way.
00:26:26It's a self-locking door.
00:26:28Really?
00:26:29Miss Gorman's going to be back in an hour.
00:26:30I'm sure it'll be fine.
00:26:31I'm stuck here with you for a full hour?
00:26:34Okay.
00:26:34Am I that bad?
00:26:36I think maybe we can pick up where we left off.
00:26:39Or maybe trust me too.
00:26:41Mm-mm.
00:26:42We're keeping our distance this time, actually.
00:26:44Yeah.
00:26:55That was my first kiss.
00:26:59My first kiss was not supposed to go like that.
00:27:01It was supposed to be special at prom and not just bumping lips.
00:27:16You're really good at this.
00:27:17One day when you regret it.
00:27:20You know, we can do more if you want.
00:27:41I think you know how much I want you.
00:27:51Do you want me?
00:27:53I want you.
00:27:59Oh, shit.
00:28:03Anyone in here?
00:28:07Oh, my God.
00:28:08How long have you two been in here?
00:28:10I really need to change this lock.
00:28:11Are you two okay?
00:28:13Oh.
00:28:14Yeah.
00:28:14Yeah, we're good.
00:28:15We're okay.
00:28:16It was great.
00:28:17I don't know if you're happy.
00:28:24You're just going to pretend like that didn't happen?
00:28:26What didn't happen?
00:28:27Hey, wait.
00:28:28It's just hormones.
00:28:31Jake, can you still play after your accident?
00:28:34Relax, I'm not dead.
00:28:35Wait, car accident?
00:28:37Guacamole wizard?
00:28:44I gotta go.
00:28:52Guacamole wizard?
00:28:54Huh?
00:28:57Are you all better after your car accident?
00:28:59Do I know you?
00:29:00Why is he being so standoffish?
00:29:03Is he trying to give me a surprise?
00:29:04Or he heard something about Cole?
00:29:07You're crushing your soda can.
00:29:10She thinks guacamole wizard is Jake Myers.
00:29:13She was in a real car accident.
00:29:15According to you, so is guacamole wizard.
00:29:17I can't take this anymore.
00:29:19Cole, wait.
00:29:21Oh, shit.
00:29:26What's up, guys?
00:29:28Um, we were just chatting.
00:29:31Chatting about Jake's grand plans to kick balls?
00:29:34Was there something that you wanted, Cole?
00:29:37Hey!
00:29:38I just figured I'd bring you some mozzarella sticks.
00:29:41They're your favorite, right?
00:29:45How did you know that?
00:29:47Tough day, huh?
00:29:47There's no more mozzarella sticks in the cafeteria.
00:29:50They're my favorite.
00:29:51He couldn't be Cole.
00:29:54Could he?
00:30:00The truth is, um, a dickhead.
00:30:04What do you honestly get out of here, bro?
00:30:05You came to my table, bro, and knocked my ball away.
00:30:15There it goes again.
00:30:16Cole is jealous.
00:30:17We got a problem here, Cole?
00:30:19We don't have a problem.
00:30:21We don't have a problem.
00:30:23Right?
00:30:24Tell Cole to get my ball, and we don't have a problem.
00:30:27Jake, it would take me forever to find one of your balls.
00:30:32I have the ball now.
00:30:33Can we stop measuring each other's dicks?
00:30:37Cole and Jake are fighting over Haley?
00:30:40Maybe I can use that.
00:30:44Jake!
00:30:45Hey!
00:30:46What if I told you that I have an internship opportunity for you with my dad?
00:30:50Wait, seriously?
00:30:51Yeah.
00:30:51Just one little catch.
00:30:53You have to pretend to like Hallie Roth.
00:30:58All right, you have the rest of the period to work on your lab reports.
00:31:01If you have any questions, I'll be at my desk.
00:31:04I thought Guacamole Wizard would feel more like Cole, but if he's really Jake, then maybe
00:31:10this was always going to end.
00:31:12You've literally been staring for five minutes.
00:31:14I'm thinking.
00:31:15About the report or about him?
00:31:16Why are you making it so weird about Jake?
00:31:19We literally made out of a sore dream.
00:31:21Maybe you've known Jake longer.
00:31:23No, you don't.
00:31:24How do you know that?
00:31:25You're going to prom with someone else.
00:31:27Stop acting like you're serious about me.
00:31:29You have no idea.
00:31:35Oh, my God.
00:31:37Is Jake asking me to prom?
00:31:52Hallie, someone's here to see you.
00:32:05Are you asking me to prom?
00:32:08Too cheesy?
00:32:09No, it's cute.
00:32:12The accident?
00:32:13The mozzarella sticks?
00:32:14He is Guacamole Wizard.
00:32:16So, um, what do you think?
00:32:19You want to go to prom with me?
00:32:21I should feel happy.
00:32:23But why does this feel so wrong?
00:32:27Hey, can we not?
00:32:32Hey, can we not?
00:32:34Dude, seriously, what is your problem?
00:32:36My problem here, dude, is that me and my lab partner have work to do.
00:32:39And you're out here to strike me with bad puns.
00:32:42Wow.
00:32:43That is some weak shit, man.
00:32:45Oh, that's weak shit?
00:32:47Is this weak shit?
00:32:51Oh, my God.
00:32:59Wow.
00:33:00He's got really pretty eyes.
00:33:07Wait, I can't.
00:33:08Colt, put me down.
00:33:10Put me down.
00:33:10Put me down.
00:33:13Don't do that again.
00:33:27New couple alert.
00:33:29Fuck off, Jen.
00:33:30Why do you hate me so much, Cole?
00:33:32You and I, we're not that different.
00:33:34And if you'd realize and give me a chance, I think that we would make a great match.
00:33:38Like, say, if you asked me to prom, I might say yes.
00:33:44Jen, you want to go to prom with me?
00:33:49Jen, you want to go to prom with me?
00:33:52We're both hot and we're both rich.
00:33:54And our dads have been in business, like, forever, so.
00:33:58How romantic.
00:33:59I think I'll pass.
00:34:02You're going to regret this, Cole Edmonds.
00:34:06Oh, here they come.
00:34:09If I message Corcamole Wizard, I wonder if Jake's phone will ding.
00:34:15What should we wear to prom?
00:34:17And the dance list.
00:34:27Um, I'll talk to you later.
00:34:28I'll see you around school, okay?
00:34:29Okay, yeah, I'll see you later.
00:34:30Bye.
00:34:32He's so different.
00:34:34Maybe he's still recovering from the accident?
00:34:38Hayley?
00:34:45What are you doing?
00:34:47Jeez.
00:34:49God.
00:34:55Here, I'll get it.
00:34:56Yeah, I know.
00:35:01Oh.
00:35:02You're scared of me seeing all the girls in your phone?
00:35:04I don't care.
00:35:06I do care.
00:35:08I don't care.
00:35:09Hey, we are.
00:35:25Don't put a problem with Jake.
00:35:27I mean, he only knows you like mozzarella sticks because of me.
00:35:30He doesn't even know you.
00:35:31And you do?
00:35:32How do you know I like mozzarella sticks?
00:35:34That's something I've only ever talked about.
00:35:36Because I pay attention to what you like.
00:35:40I noticed it at lunch.
00:35:42The first day.
00:35:44You were watching me?
00:35:47Just don't go to promenade.
00:36:03Move.
00:36:05Cole is talking to Hayley.
00:36:06Again.
00:36:07Your job is to keep them away from each other, Jake.
00:36:10Unless you don't want that internship that my dad got you.
00:36:12Obviously I do.
00:36:13Okay, then break them up, idiot.
00:36:16Uh, what do I do?
00:36:20I've got a few ideas.
00:36:26Hey, look.
00:36:28Someone will take you to prom.
00:36:30I promise.
00:36:31Yeah?
00:36:31Really, like who?
00:36:32I mean, the whole school hates me, except for Jake.
00:36:36And you.
00:36:37But you're not asking me.
00:36:40Hey.
00:36:42Oh, hey, Jake.
00:36:43Hey, Hal.
00:36:44Um, I just wanted to thank you again for the other night.
00:36:49The other night?
00:36:50Yeah, it was so sexy.
00:36:55You're so sexy.
00:36:57Jake, what are you talking about?
00:37:01I hate to break it to you, asshole, but she's my prom date.
00:37:09And she's a real tiger in the bedroom.
00:37:13Oh, shit.
00:37:15Oh, shit.
00:37:27Oh, my God.
00:37:32Stop, guys.
00:37:34Stop it.
00:37:34Stop.
00:37:35Stop.
00:37:36What the hell is going on over there?
00:37:40Shit.
00:37:41It's Principal Stevens.
00:37:42I've got to save Cole.
00:37:44I mean, Jake.
00:37:44I've got to save Jake.
00:37:50Oh, my God.
00:37:52Principal Stevens, I'm so sorry.
00:37:55Bailey Rock.
00:37:56That's detention.
00:37:58After school.
00:37:59Don't be late.
00:38:16What are you doing here?
00:38:16Cole, what are you doing here?
00:38:18Can we keep you company?
00:38:20All right.
00:38:21That's the least I could do if you saved my rest today.
00:38:24The locker thing, that was an accident.
00:38:27Oh, sure.
00:38:30So, uh, you and Jake, huh?
00:38:34No.
00:38:36He lied about that.
00:38:37I don't know why, though.
00:38:39I don't know why.
00:38:40I know.
00:38:42Father, that asshole, every time he looks at you, makes me sick to my stomach.
00:38:46Thinking about him touching you, kissing you.
00:38:49I could kill him.
00:38:53Promise me you won't go to prom with it.
00:38:58Okay, fine.
00:38:59I won't.
00:39:02Because I want to go to prom with you.
00:39:07Okay, everyone.
00:39:08Let's start off by mixing our sodium bicarbonate.
00:39:17Oh, my God.
00:39:19I am so fed up with this.
00:39:37Oh, sorry.
00:39:39I tripped.
00:39:41No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
00:39:43What?
00:39:44It always has to be about her, doesn't it?
00:39:49They're dead.
00:39:51They're both dead.
00:39:52Oh.
00:39:54How am I going to be able to talk to Guacamole Wizard?
00:39:59Oh.
00:40:00What are you?
00:40:01Are you almost crying?
00:40:03It's probably because you can't afford a new one.
00:40:07Jen, what's going on over there?
00:40:19What's going on is Jen is getting a taste of her own medicine.
00:40:22Mrs. Gorman, it's burning.
00:40:24Mr. Edmonds.
00:40:25Oh, please.
00:40:26It's baking soda and water.
00:40:27You're fine.
00:40:28Detention.
00:40:29Today, after school.
00:40:30Oh, shit.
00:40:43Jake, hey.
00:40:44Oh, uh, sorry.
00:40:46Got to get to student council.
00:40:50Hey, you didn't even try the rice trick.
00:40:53The rice trick?
00:40:56Yeah.
00:40:58You don't know about the...
00:41:00Come on.
00:41:14Hey!
00:41:15Um, Ella.
00:41:17It's Emma.
00:41:18Yeah, that's what I said.
00:41:20Can you hack a broken laptop?
00:41:24Amazing.
00:41:31Hey, it's going to be okay.
00:41:33We'll pour out in a few more minutes and it'll be like the whole thing never happened.
00:41:37No, it's not just the phone or the laptop.
00:41:39It means...
00:41:40It means I can't...
00:41:42Can't what?
00:41:46I talked to a friend online.
00:41:49He's really important to me.
00:41:53And I'm sure you're really important to him.
00:42:05You know, Cole, if you look past all that hair gel and big ol' ego and rich kid for bravo...
00:42:14Okay, okay, I get it.
00:42:18You're kind of sweet.
00:42:24Hey, look at that.
00:42:26Oh my god.
00:42:30Oh my god.
00:42:31You're a miracle worker.
00:42:38Oh, what is taking so long?
00:42:40You doused this thing in sodium bicarbonate.
00:42:43Shut up, Ella.
00:42:44It's Emma.
00:42:45Whatever.
00:42:52Oh my god.
00:43:01Oh, morning, valley whore.
00:43:03How are things in the castle?
00:43:06What are you doing?
00:43:10What are you doing?
00:43:10What are you doing?
00:43:11What are you doing?
00:43:15What are you doing?
00:43:27Guacamole wizard, when can we be together in person?
00:43:31Guacamole wizard, I want you so badly, I dream about you touching me.
00:43:34Oh my god, someone hacked my castle claimers messages.
00:43:38Touch me, guacamole wizard.
00:43:41Hey, valley whore, show them what you really like.
00:43:44Hey, valley whore, show them what you really like.
00:43:49Hey, valley whore.
00:44:02Here you go.
00:44:04Here, this is for you.
00:44:09Oh, do you like what I've done with the place?
00:44:11You hacked my laptop?
00:44:14Oh no, it wasn't me.
00:44:15It was that kid, Ella.
00:44:17But I definitely got to reap the benefits.
00:44:19What kind of incel sex over a video game, Hayley?
00:44:22What are you, catfishing this guy?
00:44:24No, I'm not trying to catfish him.
00:44:26Hey, everyone, I think valley whore is a catfing.
00:44:30Because who in their right mind would spend their time thirsting over you?
00:44:59Stop it, stop, stop!
00:45:03I thought I'd send the janitor some time.
00:45:09Jane!
00:45:10Hey!
00:45:12Now's the time.
00:45:14Tell them.
00:45:15Tell them what?
00:45:16That you're a guacamole wizard.
00:45:19Who's guacamole wizard?
00:45:22Here you go.
00:45:25Oh, my God.
00:45:27Did you think that Jake was your secret little online boyfriend?
00:45:30Oh, sweetie, I've been bribing him this whole time to pretend to like you.
00:45:34What?
00:45:34Why would you do that?
00:45:36Oh, I don't know, Cole.
00:45:37Why do you think I would do that?
00:45:40Jake, is this true?
00:45:42Have you been pretending to like me this whole time?
00:45:46Sorry.
00:45:47It was nothing personal.
00:45:49Oh, my God.
00:45:54Yeah, nothing personal, huh?
00:45:56Oh!
00:45:57Oh!
00:45:59Oh!
00:46:01Oh!
00:46:02All right, all right, all right.
00:46:04Enough!
00:46:04What in the world is going on here?
00:46:07Is that a leaf blower?
00:46:08That's all him.
00:46:10Okay, well, you both have detention, so...
00:46:17Let me get this straight.
00:46:18You stole a leaf blower and defaced school property?
00:46:22It wasn't school property, Dad.
00:46:24It was Jen's cyber boy spreadsheet.
00:46:26Jesus Christ.
00:46:27How does she always get away with this shit?
00:46:29Could it be because her father's running for Senate call?
00:46:32You think that's what it could be?
00:46:33Who cares?
00:46:34I care.
00:46:36And I hear she's got an eye for you.
00:46:38So you're taking her to prom.
00:46:40What?
00:46:41Over my dead body?
00:46:43Oh, because you're like that Haley girl?
00:46:46I'm firing her mother right now.
00:46:47No, no, please don't.
00:46:49Please.
00:46:50Then you're taking Jen to prom.
00:46:52Max's dad called.
00:46:53He said he's having a party tomorrow.
00:46:55You're going to go, and you're going to ask Jen to prom.
00:46:58End of discussion.
00:47:05Come on, you big coward.
00:47:07Message him.
00:47:08Just do it, just do it.
00:47:12You must think I'm the biggest idiot.
00:47:21I could never think that.
00:47:28But I thought you were Jake.
00:47:30Please, can't you just tell me now?
00:47:31I think I've had enough public humiliation for one lifetime.
00:47:38I heard that guy Max is throwing a party tomorrow.
00:47:41If you want, I'll meet you there.
00:47:44I'll meet you there.
00:47:55You got this, Haley.
00:47:56Just take a deep breath.
00:47:58You got this.
00:47:59You got this.
00:48:03You look beautiful.
00:48:07Thank you, Mom.
00:48:27Hey, Haley.
00:48:28I'm glad you came.
00:48:29You look so pretty.
00:48:31Hi.
00:48:31Hey, Max.
00:48:32Your house is gorgeous.
00:48:34I mean.
00:48:35No, it's just my parents' blood, honey.
00:48:36You know, they're upstairs watching The Last of Us right now.
00:48:39They don't care about shit.
00:48:40Get drunk, girl.
00:48:41Woo!
00:48:44Yeah.
00:48:55What are you doing here?
00:48:57Valley whore.
00:48:59Looks like the catfish came out of the pond.
00:49:02Hey, everyone.
00:49:03Let's give it up for Valley whore.
00:49:04Valley whore!
00:49:09Jen, why are you doing this?
00:49:11What have I even done to you?
00:49:12To me, oh, I'm actually concerned about our whole community because those little cringy
00:49:17messages on your castle game, those are concerning.
00:49:20Actually, I kind of feel a bit of a perv.
00:49:22Did you know that, Haley?
00:49:24She's a little pervy princess.
00:49:26Pervy princess!
00:49:29Pervy princess!
00:49:31Pervy princess!
00:49:32Pervy princess!
00:49:34Pervy princess!
00:49:36Let's get pervy tonight.
00:49:37Leave me alone.
00:49:39Is there a fire?
00:49:41Okay, we set off the alarm.
00:49:43Just let's get off the alarm.
00:49:50Hey, I hope you let me enter the alarm.
00:49:58I'm waiting for her.
00:49:59I know.
00:50:00I know.
00:50:01I know.
00:50:02I know.
00:50:04I know.
00:50:07I know.
00:50:33Are you... him?
00:50:36Ugh! Would you stop trying to find your stupid little cyber boyfriend?
00:50:40Okay, Cole is not him.
00:50:42Anyways, we are going to the prom together.
00:50:45No, I'm not.
00:50:46Yes, you are.
00:50:47It's okay. You can be honest about your feelings.
00:50:50Hm. So you too.
00:50:52This whole time.
00:50:56Oh my God, I am such an idiot.
00:50:59Hey, wait. Wait.
00:51:04Hey, wait.
00:51:05Whoa.
00:51:06Please, Elise, take my jacket.
00:51:08You know, if you really wanted to humiliate me, you didn't have to go to the extra effort.
00:51:12Jen was doing just fine.
00:51:13I wasn't trying to humiliate you.
00:51:14Then what were you trying to do?
00:51:16I guess you.
00:51:17Obviously, the White Quillers were just an added bonus.
00:51:20I knew I shouldn't have trusted you.
00:51:23Now, what about Guacamole, Wizard?
00:51:26What are you...
00:51:35Who is that?
00:51:36I don't know.
00:51:37Just the devil.
00:51:40Get in the car.
00:51:44I'm not going to ask you again, Cole.
00:51:46Get in the car.
00:51:47Dad, can you just act normal for once and please introduce yourself to...
00:51:50Hailey!
00:51:50Hey, I already assumed that's who this was.
00:51:54I'm a strengthens.
00:51:55So, you're the scholarship trash that's hell-bent on ruining Cole's life?
00:52:00Well, I've got news for you, young lady.
00:52:02My son is going to marry a good girl from a respectable family.
00:52:07And that's not you.
00:52:09You will be forgotten.
00:52:11You're a maid's daughter.
00:52:12And your mom works for me.
00:52:15Stay away from him.
00:52:16Or I swear to God, your mother is fired.
00:52:20Dad, stop!
00:52:22Don't you touch my family.
00:52:24I'll stay away.
00:52:26Hey, come on.
00:52:27You don't mean that.
00:52:30I hate everything you stand for.
00:52:33I hate your greed and your callousness and your elitist ideas of what you think a good person looks like.
00:52:39I hate everything about you.
00:52:41I hate all of it.
00:52:42I don't want any part of it.
00:52:45So Cole, go with your dad.
00:52:49Hailey!
00:52:53Fuck this.
00:52:55Fuck this.
00:52:58No laptop and no phone for a week.
00:53:01Ever since mom died, you've turned into this cold patriarch.
00:53:04Hailey, not that's real love.
00:53:06Why do you have to make me so miserable?
00:53:07I promised your mother I would make you a success, son.
00:53:11Even if it meant saving you from yourself.
00:53:21Hi, Hailey.
00:53:22I'm Emma.
00:53:23I know who you are.
00:53:24Right.
00:53:25I just felt kind of bad that I accidentally helped Jen ruin your life.
00:53:30So I wanted to return your laptop to you.
00:53:33Good as new.
00:53:34Good as new.
00:53:35Good as new.
00:53:38Oh, wow.
00:53:40Thanks, Emma.
00:53:41Okay, bye.
00:53:47One down, one to go.
00:53:49You're so cool.
00:53:51I know, Emma.
00:53:52Want to go to prom?
00:53:54Why not?
00:53:56Let's get these love birds together.
00:54:02Hi, Mr. Edmunds.
00:54:04Hi, Max.
00:54:05And Max's friend.
00:54:07Sorry, we weren't expecting you.
00:54:09Cole's grounded.
00:54:10Oh, he is?
00:54:12But it was his 18th birthday today.
00:54:14What can I say, Max?
00:54:16Actions have consequences.
00:54:18Birthday or no, Cole is grounded.
00:54:21Well, that really sucks because he's also the president of the prom committee.
00:54:27We were supposed to review budgets today.
00:54:29Cole?
00:54:30My son, Cole, reviewing budgets.
00:54:34He's never reviewed a budget a day in his life.
00:54:36Well, Mr. Edmunds, today could be that day.
00:54:38We just have to give him back this school-sanctioned laptop so we can get back to his very important
00:54:42and very respectable budgetary work.
00:54:53Go away!
00:54:58Max, what are you guys doing here?
00:55:01Happy birthday, Cole.
00:55:02I brought you my laptop and logged into your Castle Claimers account.
00:55:05Just get it back to me by tomorrow.
00:55:07What?
00:55:08What's going on?
00:55:09Dude, it's your 18th birthday.
00:55:11You can tell Haley who you are now.
00:55:13You can be together.
00:55:14Just log into this stupid game and tell the girl who you love who you really are.
00:55:19No.
00:55:20I'll tell her myself.
00:55:21Stick me in your car.
00:55:29Welcome to the wizard.
00:55:33Mom, I'm fine.
00:55:35I just need some time alone.
00:55:43Open the door.
00:55:46Wait, what?
00:55:47He's here?
00:55:50He's here.
00:55:56It's you.
00:55:58I should have given you this to a long time ago.
00:56:02Haley, I wanted to tell you who I was from the very beginning.
00:56:05My dad threatened to follow your mom and I had to wait a really long time to tell you who
00:56:10I was.
00:56:10I got my inheritance.
00:56:12And I can protect you and your family and so you don't have to choose.
00:56:29I understand if this changes things.
00:56:32If you don't love me the way you love guacamole wizard, but I need you to know I love you.
00:56:51Nicole, I love you.
00:56:53You do?
00:56:55Yes, you idiot.
00:56:57I've loved you for months.
00:56:59I mean, this whole guacamole wizard thing was so confusing, though, because I had to be loyal to him.
00:57:05But you're him.
00:57:07You didn't expect her.
00:57:09I mean, I always hoped it was you.
00:57:14Until you hoped?
00:57:16Yes.
00:57:17I hoped it was you.
00:57:19You were always there for me.
00:57:24You're really fucking hot.
00:57:30Hey, uh.
00:57:31There are those things I said we could do.
00:57:34You ever go?
00:57:36Yeah.
00:57:40Take my clothes off.
00:57:41You're getting there, don't worry.
00:57:42Mm-hmm.
00:57:46I'm so beyond you.
00:57:48Just beyond me.
00:57:51I'm so beyond you.
00:57:56I'm so beyond me.
00:57:58Just beyond me.
00:58:05Okay, so, what do you think?
00:58:08Ten out of ten.
00:58:09Oh.
00:58:10Yeah.
00:58:10Would do again.
00:58:12Okay, sex with sex with me specifically.
00:58:14I've only ever had sex with you specifically.
00:58:17All right.
00:58:18All right, that's fair.
00:58:19I'll, uh, I'll take that as a one.
00:58:26What is my life now?
00:58:28Am I being nice to Cole Edmonds?
00:58:30Mm.
00:58:31Oh, God, no.
00:58:32I fully expect you to continue to berate me endlessly.
00:58:36No, I'm just lost behind it.
00:58:39There's always been lost behind it.
00:58:41I'll see you in a minute now.
00:58:42Stop it.
00:58:46Um, say, isn't it promenade?
00:58:50I think you know if it's promenade.
00:58:53Okay.
00:58:53Well, but the real question is, do you got a date?
00:59:00Cole, are you asking me to prom?
00:59:02Oh, I would have asked you earlier, but Jay kind of gave me to the gym.
00:59:06Oh, God, please don't mention his name again.
00:59:08I don't want to hear it.
00:59:09Yeah, you don't have to ask me twice.
00:59:11But I don't even have a dress.
00:59:14Later.
00:59:18I just slept with Cole Edmonds, and I'm in love with Cole Edmonds.
00:59:23Who would have guessed?
00:59:27I thought I'm only the best for my princess.
00:59:31Where did you get that?
00:59:33Uh, I might have gotten you a dress on the off chance that you might have wanted to go
00:59:39to prom with me, and maybe had nothing to wear.
00:59:44Of course I'll go to prom with you.
00:59:50Mr. Edmonds, I didn't expect you to be here.
00:59:54Cole, are you here?
00:59:57Cole, are you here?
01:00:00Mr. Edmonds, you can't just park into my house.
01:00:02I see you, Cole.
01:00:04You are in big trouble.
01:00:21Hey, uh, you almost done in there?
01:00:25You try changing into an evening gown in a bunch of thorny bushes.
01:00:30What do you think?
01:00:30Okay, I'm ready.
01:00:42What do you think?
01:00:47My God, Haley, you are the most beautiful woman I have ever seen.
01:00:53Uh, uh, uh, uh, I just hunched over in a car mirror to do this lipstick.
01:00:57You're not messing it up for at least 20 minutes.
01:01:0020 more minutes.
01:01:01We're in.
01:01:02Deal.
01:01:06Thank you all for using the prom voting site to cast your votes.
01:01:10I hear we have a winner.
01:01:14And your 2026 prom queen is...
01:01:18Jen Longfellow.
01:01:24Thank you guys so much.
01:01:27Seriously, this makes the world to me.
01:01:29I mean, like, who else would win, right?
01:01:32Oh, this is just the perfect moment.
01:01:38Oh my God, that's Haley and Cole.
01:01:42It was fun.
01:01:43Since, what did you get?
01:01:45Yes.
01:01:49Hey, or, uh, most time that's up.
01:01:52No.
01:01:53But, who cares?
01:01:56Hell yeah.
01:01:57Woo!
01:02:00Ew, literally, what the fuck?
01:02:02Dang it.
01:02:03Language.
01:02:04I am the queen, okay?
01:02:05She's just a little pervy princess.
01:02:07Come on, everyone say it with me.
01:02:09Pervy princess, pervy princess, pervy princess.
01:02:17Oh, my God.
01:02:19Wait, wait, wait.
01:02:20What are those?
01:02:21Those are texts between me and my dad.
01:02:23Make Cole Edmonds fall in love with you.
01:02:26His dad's month is essential to funding my campaign.
01:02:30Don't worry, Daddy.
01:02:31If I can't have it, no one can.
01:02:35I'm going to destroy Haley Roth's life.
01:02:37Is this real?
01:02:39Jen's crazy.
01:02:41Who did this?
01:02:44Who did this?
01:02:47What?
01:02:48You exploited me for a hacking job and didn't think I was going to hack your phone?
01:02:51You little shit!
01:02:54You know, Jen, as the principal, I'm supposed to remain impartial and above all of this petty drama.
01:03:02But quite frankly, you are the worst.
01:03:06And I think it's time that you are expelled from Edmonds Academy.
01:03:11You can't do that!
01:03:12I'm the principal, so yes, I can.
01:03:24There was no winter chick!
01:03:26You lied to me!
01:03:40You lied to me!
01:03:44Now all I need is my handsome prince.
01:03:46Oh.
01:03:47Yeah, no can do.
01:03:48All I have to offer is a Bowie Knight with a chip on his shoulder and an awesome sense of
01:03:54humor.
01:03:54Oh, how can I refuse?
01:04:02Oh, no, that's my dad.
01:04:07We are going home right now.
01:04:10You disobeyed me for the last time, boy.
01:04:12Yeah, I'm not a boy, Dad.
01:04:14You talk all the time about wanting a man that's worthy of the family last name.
01:04:19Yet, you can't see I've already become that man.
01:04:22And it's because of Hayley.
01:04:24And you can accept that, or I'll make my own path.
01:04:27And best believe me, I can.
01:04:30I'll say this.
01:04:32It's the most backbone I've ever seen in you, Cole.
01:04:37Joy pride.
01:04:45I am so proud of you.
01:04:48I kind of done with all you being by my side.
01:04:51That was terrifying.
01:04:53It's not like we haven't slayed a dragon before, no, so.
01:04:57I love you, Bella Queen.
01:04:59I love you, guacamole wizard.
01:05:01Oh, my God, I gotta change that username.
01:05:03Yeah, you do.
01:05:04Hey.
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