- 9 hours ago
The Price of 99 Cents - FULL EP 2026
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Short filmTranscript
00:00I was sent away because of a 99 cent in-app purchase, that's it, that's the whole reason, my parents
00:05ran a strict, screen free household, no gaming, no social media, no recreational devices of any kind, dad worked in
00:12tech and believed, with the conviction of a man who'd built systems for a living, that the right rules applied
00:16early enough could prevent any outcome he didn't want, when I bought a prepaid burner phone and spent 99 cents
00:22on a mobile game, he found the transaction in a bank statement, he called it what he needed it to
00:26be, early onset digital dependency, a warning sign we cannot ignore.
00:30He enrolled me in a wilderness therapy program, one of those behavioral reform camps buried in the backcountry, two states
00:35from home, and I was gone for three years, I came back the night Clara returned from Europe, New Year's
00:40Eve, the table was set, the house smelled like something my mother had been slow cooking since that afternoon, and
00:45everything was arranged to feel like a fresh start, my father said my name across the table, I shot to
00:50my feet so fast the chair scraped the floor, resident 47, Julian Quinn, reporting, my mother's eyes filled immediately, baby,
00:57her voice broke on the word,
00:59You're home, you don't have to do that anymore, my father's jaw tightened, we said you there for your own
01:05good, is that really how you're going to start tonight, I pressed my shaking hands flat against my thighs and
01:09held them still, I wouldn't do that sir, everything I have came from you, I know my place, we ate,
01:15after, I offered to do the dishes, through the kitchen wall, my father's voice carried, low and satisfied, look how
01:21much he's matured, that program was the right call, my colleague's son got addicted to gaming and started connecting with
01:26the wrong people online,
01:27His whole trajectory collapsed, I spent three years making, sure that didn't happen to Julian, worth every penny, dad, you
01:34sent me to hell, but you're going to understand that very soon, I looked through the kitchen window at the
01:38river bridge two blocks away, they launched fireworks from the water every New Year's Eve, when the first one went
01:43up, that would be the moment, a death that loud, that visible, would be enough to bring that place down,
01:48I came out of the kitchen and my mother was already waiting in the doorway,
01:51She pressed a slice of orange into my hand before I could say anything, my favorite, she had sent them
01:56to me every month for three years without fail, even at that place, I bit into it, I felt nothing,
02:01thanks, mom, I want to go see the fireworks from the bridge, can we meet there?
02:06She blinked, then smiled wide enough to reach her eyes, of course we'll all go together, you don't have to
02:12ask like that baby, but wasn't not being obedient enough the reason you sent me away, she pulled me down
02:16to the couch and started going through the gift bags on the coffee table,
02:19Everything in here, is something you like, we picked all of it, Clara leaned over and draped an arm around
02:25my shoulder, mom, he's going to like mine best, she produced the latest iPhone from behind her back and held
02:31it out, her eyes were warm with something trying to pass for closeness, my shoulder locked under her arm, every
02:36muscle in my neck pulled taut, one by one, without permission, I forced a smile and stepped aside, keep it
02:42Clara, I won't use it, she deflated and fell back against the cushions, my father watched the exchange and gave
02:47a single nod of approval,
02:48Take what your sister offers, I trust you've learned, you know better than to let a device run your life,
02:54he handed us each an envelope, mine was thick, Clara's was thin, you missed years of holidays, this covers all
03:00of it, buy whatever you want, if it's not enough, ask your mom,
03:03I held the envelope and looked around the room, red and silver decorations, everywhere, my mother, still, peeling fruit the
03:10way she, always had, my father sitting, slightly stiff the way he, always did when he was trying, Clara talking
03:16fast, filling, in every silence before it, could grow,
03:19They looked like they loved me, why, why did people who loved me choose that place, without warning, my breathing
03:24started to go, everything at the edges of my vision folded inward, a grip closed around my ankle, rough, familiar,
03:30pulling down, the voice landed right beside my ear, low and tight, how many times now, when are you going
03:36to stop making this harder than it has to be, lie still, I said lie still, I bit down through
03:40the inside of my cheek and swallowed,
03:42The doorbell rang, while their attention snapped to the front door, I covered my mouth with one hand and moved
03:47fast down the hall to the bathroom, I turned the faucet on cold and held my wrists under it, forced
03:52air in and out, on the shelf above the sink, my father's razor sat in its stand, I couldn't stop
03:57looking at it, the thought arrived the way it always did, quiet, measured, like it was just presenting facts, you
04:03know how fast it would be, from wanting to come home to wanting to die, the distance was exactly 3
04:07years, I tried before, in that place, a knotted towel from the bathroom rack,
04:11a basin full of water, I tried both, the consequences of being found were worse than what I've been trying
04:17to escape, a lot worse, so eventually I stopped trying, that didn't mean I wanted to live, what grew instead
04:22was something else entirely, stay alive long enough to get out, make your death loud enough to tear the walls
04:27down, Julian, my mother's voice from the hallway, we're about to head out, you okay in there, I set the
04:32razor back in the stand, opened the door, she was waiting in the hall with a scarf folded over her
04:37arm, it's below freezing out there,
04:39she wrapped it around my neck and tucked the ends in, smoothing my collar as she went, I made this,
04:44kept starting over because I kept dropping stitches, her fingers tracked down toward my collar, half an inch lower and
04:50she would have felt them, the scars, the new ones pressed over the old ones that never fully healed, would
04:55you cry, mom, or would you find a way to decide I'd brought it on myself,
04:59the Harmon family is already down by the river, she said, turning me toward the door, they headed out a
05:04few minutes ago, a name surfaced from somewhere I'd stopped looking, Avery, quick eyes, kind voice, the kind of person
05:10who made you feel like the room was slightly better organized for having her in it, we had a plan,
05:14a long time ago, before everything, to go see the snow in Berlin together, that version of me is so
05:20far away I can barely make out his outline,
05:22the last time I saw her she was just a kid, now she's, she's so grown up and gorgeous, she's
05:28really made something of herself,
05:29my mother caught herself and pivoted, Julian, I know you were planning to study abroad, your dad has already been
05:34looking into options, after the new year you can start the application process again, you'll have a fresh start,
05:39mom, I don't have a future anymore, everyone around us was bright faced and loud, turned toward the water, toward
05:45midnight, a young couple passed and handed out sparklers, calling, happy new year, to anyone within reach, my parents and
05:51Clara called it back, a sparkler ended up in my hand,
05:54you haven't had one of these forever, right, Clara said, take all three, I want you to have them,
06:00my mother nudged my father, remember how he used to chase you around the backyard with those when he was
06:05little,
06:05my father smiled, a real one, not the careful kind, and pulled out his lighter, go ahead, I walked a
06:11few feet ahead of them and turned back, lit the first one,
06:13the spark burst gold and red between us, and through the light I watched their faces, three years, three visits,
06:19first year, Clara came alone,
06:21I cried on the back of her hand, I said please ask them to come get me, please, I'll do
06:25anything they want, please, she looked at the ground,
06:28I tried Julian, dad says you have to complete the full three year program, that's the rule, everyone around us
06:36was bright faced and loud, turned toward the water, toward midnight,
06:39a young couple passed and handed out sparklers, calling, happy new year, to anyone within reach, my parents and Clara
06:45called it back, a sparkler ended up in my hand,
06:48you haven't had one of these forever, right, Clara said, take all three, I want you to have them, my
06:54mother nudged my father,
06:55remember how he used to chase you around the backyard with those when he was little, my father smiled, a
07:00real one, not the careful kind, and pulled out his lighter, go ahead,
07:04I walked a few feet ahead of them and turned back, lit the first one, the spark burst gold and
07:08red between us, and through the light I watched their faces,
07:11three years, three visits, first year, Clara came alone, I cried on the back of her hand, I said please
07:17ask them to come get me, please, I'll do anything they want, please,
07:20she looked at the ground, I tried Julian, dad says you have to complete the full three year program, that's
07:27the rule,
07:28three years, three visits, first year, Clara came alone, I cried on the back of her hand, I said please
07:34ask them to come get me, please,
07:36I'll do anything they want, please, she looked at the ground, I tried Julian, dad says you have to complete
07:43the full three year program,
07:45that's the rule, second year, my mother came, I grabbed the sleeve of her coat and wouldn't let go, I
07:50said take me home,
07:51I'll be perfect, I swear I will, I'm dying here, I mean that literally, please, she pried my hands off
07:57without looking at me while she did it,
07:59you're doing so well, finish the program and we'll be there the day you graduate, third year, my father said
08:04Clara was almost done with school,
08:05I'd be out soon, everything was going to be fine, Julian Quinn was already gone by then,
08:10the boys standing in front of them was just whatever was left, breathing, upright, waiting, the third sparkler faded out,
08:16my parents were still talking behind me, laughing at something, I took one step back, then another,
08:21then I turned toward the bridge and started walking, my feet felt lighter with every block, almost there, almost over,
08:27long time no see Julian Quinn, the voice came from behind me, clear and warm and completely wrong for this
08:32moment,
08:33I stopped, she came around to face me, since I wasn't turning, long time no see Julian Quinn,
08:38the voice came from behind me, clear and warm and completely wrong for this moment, I stopped,
08:43she came around to face me, since I wasn't turning, you're not even gonna look at me,
08:47Avery's voice was a little older than I remembered, more settled, I stared at the logo on her sweatshirt,
08:52I didn't have the strength to raise my eyes, she held out a lit sparkler between us,
08:56I heard you might be looking at programs abroad again, she said, keeping her voice easy,
09:00what is it, I saved all my old application materials, everything, the whole package,
09:04I could bring it over tomorrow morning,
09:05I meant to say don't bother, my mouth stayed shut,
09:08I'll come find you in the morning, the snow in Berlin, she said, quieter,
09:13it's everything we said it would be, you'll come and see it eventually right,
09:16something hit me so hard in the chest I couldn't breathe, she still remembered,
09:20she was asking like it was still possible, my eyes burned, I had been completely certain I had nothing
09:25left to cry with, someone called her name from the path, she glanced back, then at me,
09:29that's my dad, tomorrow morning, okay, she walked back toward the lights,
09:33I stood there with the sparkler burning down to nothing in my hand, why now, why does someone
09:38have to show up right now and tell me she still remembers, my parents voices carried over the
09:42crowd,
09:44where did Julian go, fireworks are starting, he's fine, he's been too isolated to go far,
09:49he'll find us when the crowds thin out, mom, my envelope was really that thin though,
09:54Clara, my father's sharper,
09:57Do you understand what this family gave up for your education? We sent Julian away,
10:01we handed you those years, he's home now, and we make it right, that's the end of it.
10:05The world went completely quiet, sacrificed, we handed you those years, I had spent 3 years
10:10telling myself it was a miscalculation, a terrible mistake made by people who genuinely didn't know
10:15better, they knew exactly what they were choosing between, they chose her, they sent me to that place
10:19so Clara would have a clean record for her college applications, so nothing from our family
10:24would complicate her admissions file, the noise around me disappeared, the faces blurred into
10:28streaks of light, I walked, I reached the bridge, I closed my eyes, I let go of the railing,
10:33and I fell, the water hit like concrete from a hundred feet, cold forced itself into my lungs
10:38and the pain was unlike anything, total and absolute, my body fought without instruction,
10:43but underneath the pain, underneath everything, something unclenched, a feeling I hadn't felt in
10:473 years, release, the cold went dark, I thought I would keep sinking, then I wasn't sinking,
10:52I was floating, the cheering from the riverbanks had stopped, a different sound was spreading
10:57through the crowd, the fireworks show cut off mid-sequence, emergency crews started pushing
11:07people back from the water, a searchlight swept the surface, my mother's hand-knit scarf floated up,
11:12right against the dark water, exactly where I'd gone in, a rescue diver found me by it,
11:16they pulled me out, CPR on the dock, gurney, ambulance, lights running, at the ER, the trauma
11:22team worked on me for over 40 minutes, the attending physician stepped outside and found
11:26the officer on scene, officer this wasn't a clean drowning, the body has extensive scarring,
11:31old and new, multiple locations, non-drowning injuries, pre-existing, significant, I'm required
11:37by law to flag this as a mandatory report, this goes to your sergeant before next of kin is
11:41contact, my consciousness drifted back across the city to the apartment, my mother was pacing
11:45the living room in her coat, still wearing it, my father sat on the couch with his hands pressed
11:49flat against his knees, it's been 90 minutes, he's making a point, his voice was controlled,
11:55covering something else underneath, he's not gonna do something drastic, my mother didn't
11:59answer, the Harmon girl said she saw him walking toward the bridge, she's been texting, he doesn't
12:05have a key, he'll be back when he gets cold, two blocks away, my mother's scarf was sealed
12:10in an evidence bag, the doorbell rang, two officers, one detective, are you the family of
12:15Julian Quinn, my mother's hand stayed on the door handle, her voice came out in fragments,
12:20that's, yes, he's my son, what happened, at approximately 11 48 pm, Julian Quinn jumped
12:25from the pedestrian bridge over riverside, he was recovered by water rescue and transported
12:29to Mercy General, where despite full resuscitatory efforts, he was pronounced dead at 1 17 am,
12:35my mother's legs simply stopped holding her, she hit the floor and stayed there, my father
12:39tried to stand and couldn't manage it, she looked up at him from where she'd fallen, no words,
12:43just her face, and what was on it had no single name, the detective allowed them exactly one
12:48breath, I'm deeply sorry for your loss, I also need to inform you, the attending physician
12:52filed a mandatory report tonight, your son's body has significant non-accidental injuries,
12:57multiple sites, multiple stages of healing, the medical examiner is conducting a full forensic
13:01workup, and this is now an active investigation, we're gonna need your full cooperation,
13:05Clara threw herself in front of the detective, she was shaking so hard her words came out broken,
13:09you have the wrong family, my brother wouldn't, he wouldn't do this, please tell me you have the
13:15wrong person, the detective set a photograph on the table, my mother's scarf, my jacket,
13:20Clara looked at them for 3 full seconds, then she turned toward my bedroom door,
13:24the detective was already moving, may I?
13:26I stayed still, I knew what was in there, the note and the written account, every name,
13:31every detail, every incident I could document in the months I spent preparing for this night,
13:35I had planned that part as carefully as everything else, I wanted it found, I needed it found,
13:39the notebook and the folded pages came out from under my mattress, sealed into evidence bags one
13:44by one, my father pulled himself upright, his face had caved in, his voice came out wrong,
13:50flattened, like something behind it had been cut, you'll see him, but first, all 3 of you need to
14:03come to the station with us, tonight, the squad car was parked outside with its lights running,
14:08neighbors had gathered on the sidewalk, my parents and Clara walked through the crowd to the car,
14:12Avery was standing on the sidewalk, she grabbed Clara's arm,
14:16What's happening? Where is Julian? What's going on?
14:20He jumped off the bridge tonight sweetheart, I'm so sorry.
14:26Avery went completely still, in front of her, a police car, 3 shattered people,
14:30and every face around her confirming the same thing, she knew I was gone,
14:34I'm sorry, Avery, I meant to say something to you tonight, I never got the chance,
14:39the station's conference room, my mother was still crying, had not stopped,
14:43the same 2 lines cycling through what was left of her voice,
14:45Where is my son? Please let me see him, where is he?
14:48My father sat with his head down, he looked like he had aged 2 decades between the apartment and this
14:53chair,
14:53a detected spread photographs across the table, forensic documentation from the hospital,
14:57The injuries on my body, cataloged, my mother's hands flew up to cover her mouth,
15:02She barely made sound,
15:04What did they do to you?
15:05The second detective set the notebook on the table between them,
15:08My account, 3 years of everything,
15:11According to your son's written statement and several witness accounts,
15:13Julian was enrolled in a residential wilderness therapy program, walk me through that decision,
15:18It was a behavioral modification program, closed campus, structured residential environment,
15:23He stopped,
15:24He was showing what we believed were early signs of problematic digital attendency,
15:29We wanted to intervene before it escalated,
15:32Mr. Quinn,
15:34Julian had no criminal record,
15:36No documented substance abuse,
15:38He was a college student with a clean academic history,
15:41And no record of behavioral incidents prior to the enrollment date,
15:44He was 18 years old when you enrolled him,
15:46What specifically led you to choose a residential lockdown program over outpatient therapy?
15:50It was his decision,
15:52She looked at my father,
15:54Flat,
15:54No heat left in it,
15:56Just the fact,
15:57He said he'd researched the program,
15:59He told me he had visited the campus,
16:01He guaranteed me it was a safe environment,
16:04Patricia,
16:04Julian kept calling,
16:06Her voice started to come apart,
16:08He sent letters,
16:08He told us something was wrong,
16:10Over and over he told us he begged us to come get him,
16:13And you told me he was playing us,
16:14You said he was testing boundaries,
16:16You said resistance to the program was part of the process,
16:19I didn't know,
16:19You didn't want to know,
16:21She struck him,
16:22Open palm,
16:23He was telling us the truth every single time,
16:25And you made me doubt him,
16:27You made me leave him there,
16:29I didn't know,
16:29You didn't want to know,
16:31She struck him,
16:32Open palm,
16:32He was telling us the truth every single time,
16:35And you made me doubt him,
16:37You made me leave him there,
16:38Clara's palms were bleeding,
16:40She'd been pressing her nails into them since the apartment,
16:42She dropped to the floor in front of both of them,
16:44It was me,
16:46This happened because of me,
16:48If they hadn't needed to clear the way,
16:49My father came apart,
16:51Not piece by piece,
16:52All at once,
16:53Like a load bearing wall giving out,
16:54He struck himself across the face,
16:56Once,
16:57Twice,
16:57A third time,
16:59The sound of it flat and ugly in the small room,
17:01I did this,
17:02I put him there and I kept him there,
17:04And I told myself it was the right decision,
17:05And I did this,
17:06Stop,
17:07My mother's voice cut across all of it,
17:09Stop talking,
17:10I was in the corner of the room,
17:11Watching,
17:12My chest ached,
17:13I had stopped hating them somewhere in year two,
17:15When I realized that hatred burned fuel I didn't have left,
17:18I wasn't here for revenge,
17:19I was here because places like that don't stay open unless everyone around them,
17:23The parents,
17:23The regulators,
17:24The neighbors,
17:25Makes a collective choice not to look,
17:27I needed someone to start looking,
17:28A detective slapped his palm flat on the table,
17:31Everyone in the room flinched,
17:32This is not the time,
17:33Right now,
17:34You are going to give us everything,
17:36The enrollment paperwork,
17:37The contract,
17:38Every piece of communication you receive from that facility,
17:40Because we have a window,
17:41And if we lose it,
17:42This case gets exponentially harder,
17:44Do you understand?
17:45The facility is about 90 miles north,
17:48Rural county,
17:50Three year minimum contract,
17:51No unannounced visits,
17:53No outside interference with their curriculum,
17:55He was speaking mechanically now,
17:57Reciting,
17:58I have all the paperwork at home,
17:59I have everything,
18:00A third detective had been running the facility's registration records,
18:03Not only was the academy legally registered,
18:06It had appeared on a state approved list of behavioral programs twice,
18:09Past three consecutive inspections,
18:11Because they always knew when inspections were coming,
18:13We all did,
18:14We learned very early what happened to anyone who didn't have the right answers ready when the visitors showed up,
18:18By 4 a.m.,
18:19A joint two county operation was being coordinated,
18:22No one authorized a leak,
18:24By morning,
18:24My name was trending anyway,
18:26The headline was short and got everything wrong,
18:2826 year old jumps from Riverside Bridge on New Year's Eve,
18:31Mental health crisis or something more,
18:33The comment section filled the way it always does,
18:35Who jumps in front of a crowd during fireworks,
18:37That's pure theater,
18:38That's wanting attention,
18:40Always something dramatic behind these things,
18:42Couldn't handle real life,
18:43His parents invested years trying to help him and this is how he repays them,
18:46Some people are just determined to self destruct,
18:49Probably debt,
18:50Saw something like this last year,
18:51The theories multiplied,
18:53He'd had a breakdown,
18:54He'd gambled everything away online,
18:55He had a drug problem,
18:57His parents were blameless victims of an ungrateful son,
19:00My parents and Clara watched all of it and couldn't say a single word,
19:03Because the detectives had been explicit,
19:05Any public statement would compromise the operation before it was ready,
19:08Then a post appeared on X from a verified account with a Berlin University affiliation,
19:12My name is Avery,
19:13The young man who died on New Year's Eve was my best friend growing up,
19:17The Julian I knew once bought every item off a street vendor's cart on a cold December night,
19:20Just so the man could close up and go home,
19:23And gave everything to the sanitation crew working the block,
19:26He gave up a paid research placement to spend a semester tutoring kids in a rural district three
19:30Hours from home,
19:31Because he said those schools had no one else coming,
19:33I don't know what happened to him in these last three years,
19:35But I know who he was before,
19:37He doesn't deserve what's being said about him right now,
19:39Please stop,
19:40Give the truth time to surface,
19:42Give him that much,
19:43The comment section shifted,
19:44Not immediately,
19:45Not completely,
19:46But it moved,
19:47If she's defending him this hard,
19:49There's something else going on here,
19:50I'm waiting for actual information before I say anything else,
19:53Who was this guy,
19:54Really?
19:54I watched her words on the screen,
19:56Something ached in whatever I still had left to feel with,
19:59When everyone else was building a story out of nothing,
20:01She remembered who I actually was,
20:03She stood up and said my name like it meant something,
20:05And the last thing I left her was this,
20:07I'm sorry,
20:08Avery,
20:08Just before dawn,
20:10The operation moved,
20:11Officers arrived at the academy campus before the morning staff shift,
20:1447 employees detained before a single phone could be reached,
20:18312 residents,
20:19Some of them ran toward the officers the moment the doors opened,
20:22Some stood in the doorway and didn't move,
20:24Didn't speak,
20:25Just looked out with that flat,
20:26Thousand yard stare I recognized from the inside of my own skull,
20:29The equipment was brought out in daylight,
20:31In front of cameras,
20:32Restraint boards,
20:33Electrical devices,
20:34The tools they used that were designed not to leave marks,
20:37Unless you fought back hard enough,
20:38I had fought back,
20:40Every arrest was photographed,
20:41Every piece of equipment cataloged,
20:43By mid morning it was on every major outlet,
20:45The original comments disappeared,
20:47In their place,
20:48Julian Quinn,
20:49Rest easy,
20:50Thank you for opening that door,
20:51I hope wherever you are,
20:52You're finally free,
20:53We should have looked sooner,
20:54I'm sorry we didn't look sooner,
20:56The replies to Avery's post filled with the same thing,
20:59Over and over,
20:59I watched my mother from across the parking lot,
21:02When officers led the academy's director out in handcuffs past the cameras,
21:05She broke away from the officer beside her before anyone could react,
21:08She crossed the distance in seconds,
21:10She hit the director with everything she had,
21:12Both hands,
21:13Voice past language,
21:14Past anything organized,
21:16Give him back,
21:18Give me my son back,
21:20He was 17 years old when you got him,
21:24He was 17,
21:26Later,
21:26At the hospital,
21:27They let the family in,
21:28My mother walked to the table and put both hands on either side of my face,
21:32She stood there for a long time without moving,
21:34You can be angry at me,
21:36You should be angry,
21:38I'll carry that for the rest of my life,
21:41Clara knelt beside her and wrapped both arms around my arm and didn't say anything at all,
21:45Her shoulders shook so hard she looked like she might come apart,
21:48My father stood apart from both of them,
21:50He struck himself across the face,
21:52Once,
21:53Twice,
21:53Sounds coming out of him that didn't form words,
21:55I did this,
21:56He said,
21:57Over and over,
21:58This is what I did,
21:59My parents separated before the year was out,
22:01Quietly,
22:02With the particular exhaustion of two people who had burned through everything they had and come out the other side
22:06with nothing left but wreckage,
22:08They sold the house and most of what was in it,
22:09The money went to a trauma recovery organization,
22:12The one that provided long-term psychiatric care for survivors of residential behavioral programs,
22:17My father said it was the only thing he could think to do that was real,
22:20Clara quit her job,
22:21She took a position at a community center,
22:23Physical,
22:23Long hours work,
22:25The kind that doesn't leave enough space in your head for anything else to grow,
22:28Her paychecks went to the rural tutoring program where I'd volunteered,
22:31Every month,
22:32No exceptions,
22:33My mother went to the cemetery every week,
22:35Sometimes twice,
22:35She brought flowers,
22:37Sat until the light changed,
22:38And talked to me the way she had when I was very small,
22:41Just talking,
22:42About nothing in particular,
22:43Filling in the quiet,
22:44She leaned back against the headstone and said very softly,
22:47Julian,
22:48I miss you so much,
22:51Can I just sit here with you for a while?
22:53I was beside her,
22:54I had been beside her the whole time,
22:56Mom,
22:56I forgave you a long time ago,
22:58I wasn't sure that was what was keeping me here,
23:00But when I said it,
23:01Even in silence,
23:02Even to someone who couldn't hear,
23:04Something in me loosened,
23:05Thunder moved low across the sky,
23:07Distant and slow,
23:08My mother looked up,
23:09Is that you?
23:10She said,
23:11Telling me to go?
23:12She stood carefully,
23:13Patted the top of the headstone once,
23:15Alright,
23:15I'll be back soon,
23:16She walked down the path and didn't look back,
23:18I sat with the quiet for a while,
23:20Then a black umbrella came around the corner,
23:22Avery,
23:23She stopped when she saw the grave,
23:25Stood there for a moment before she came any closer,
23:27She set two things down at the base of the stone,
23:29A bunch of iris flowers,
23:31And a small glass bottle,
23:32That's snow,
23:34From Berlin,
23:35I know it melted,
23:37But I brought it anyway,
23:39I'm going back,
23:40I can't stay here anymore,
23:41Every street in this city has you on it,
23:43I keep turning corners expecting to see you,
23:46I keep thinking if I had pushed harder,
23:48If I had tracked down where they sent you and showed up at the door,
23:50She pressed her fingertips to the engraving of my name,
23:53I'm sorry I didn't,
23:54The rain came back,
23:55Fine,
23:56Thin,
23:56Barely there,
23:57She stood up,
23:58She looked at the headstone one last time,
24:00Have a better one next time,
24:01She said,
24:02Wherever you end up,
24:03Have a better one,
24:04She turned and walked back down the path through the gray morning,
24:07I watched her until she was gone,
24:08If there is a next time,
24:09I said to no one,
24:11And you're in it,
24:11I'll come,
24:12The world went soft at the edges,
24:14The last wait,
24:15The very last of it,
24:16Let go,
24:16I wasn't holding on to anything anymore,
24:18I went,
24:18I was doing it,
24:19I went,
24:19I found it,
24:19I went,
24:19I went,
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