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Short filmTranscript
00:00I was sent away because of a 99 cent in-app purchase. That's it, that's the whole reason.
00:04My parents ran a strict, screen-free household, no gaming, no social media,
00:09no recreational devices of any kind. Dad worked in tech and believed, with the conviction of a
00:13man who'd built systems for a living, that the right rules applied early enough could prevent
00:17any outcome he didn't want. When I bought a prepaid burner phone and spent 99 cents on a
00:22mobile game, he found the transaction in the bank statement. He called it what he needed it to be,
00:26early-onset digital dependency, a warning sign we cannot ignore. He enrolled me in a wilderness
00:31therapy program, one of those behavioral reform camps buried in the backcountry, two states from
00:35home, and I was gone for three years. I came back the night Clara returned from Europe, New Year's
00:40Eve. The table was set, the house smelled like something my mother had been slow cooking since
00:44that afternoon, and everything was arranged to feel like a fresh start. My father said my name
00:48across the table. I shot to my feet so fast the chair scraped the floor. Resident 47, Julian Quinn,
00:54reporting. My mother's eyes filled immediately. Baby. Her voice broke on the word. You're home,
00:59you don't have to do that anymore. My father's jaw tightened. We said you there for your own good,
01:05is that really how you're going to start tonight? I pressed my shaking hands flat against my thighs
01:09and held them still. I wouldn't do that sir, everything I have came from you, I know my place.
01:14We ate. After, I offered to do the dishes. Through the kitchen wall, my father's voice carried,
01:19low and satisfied. Look how much he's matured. That program was the right call. My colleague's
01:24son got addicted to gaming and started connecting with the wrong people online. His whole trajectory
01:28collapsed. I spent three years making. Sure that didn't happen to Julian. Worth every penny.
01:33Dad, you sent me to hell, but you're going to understand that very soon. I looked through the
01:37kitchen window at the river bridge two blocks away. They launched fireworks from the water every
01:41New Year's Eve. When the first one went up, that would be the moment. A death that loud,
01:45that visible, would be enough to bring that place down. I came out of the kitchen and my
01:49mother was already waiting in the doorway. She pressed a slice of orange into my hand before
01:53I could say anything. My favorite. She had sent them to me every month for three years without fail,
01:58even at that place. I bit into it. I felt nothing. Thanks, mom. I want to go see the fireworks
02:04from
02:04the bridge. Can we meet there? She blinked, then smiled wide enough to reach her eyes.
02:09Of course we'll all go together. You don't have to ask like that baby.
02:13But wasn't not being obedient enough the reason you sent me away. She pulled me down to the couch
02:17and started going through the gift bags on the coffee table. Everything in here is something
02:21you like. We picked all of it. Clara leaned over and draped an arm around my shoulder.
02:26Mom, he's going to like mine best. She produced the latest iPhone from behind her back and held
02:31it out. Her eyes were warm with something trying to pass for closeness. My shoulder locked under her
02:35arm. Every muscle in my neck pulled taut, one by one, without permission. I forced a smile and
02:41stepped aside. Keep it Clara. I won't use it. She deflated and fell back against the cushions.
02:45My father watched the exchange and gave a single nod of approval. Take what your sister offers.
02:50I trust you've learned. You know better than to let a device run your life. He handed us each an
02:54envelope. Mine was thick. Clara's was thin. You missed years of holidays. This covers all of it.
03:01Buy whatever you want. If it's not enough, ask your mom. I held the envelope and looked around the room.
03:05Red and silver decorations. Everywhere. My mother, still, peeling fruit the way she, always had.
03:11My father sitting, slightly stiff the way he, always did when he was trying. Clara talking fast,
03:16filling. In every silence before it, could grow. They looked like they loved me. Why? Why did people
03:21who loved me choose that place? Without warning, my breathing started to go. Everything at the edges
03:26of my vision folded inward. A grip closed around my ankle, rough, familiar, pulling down. The voice
03:32landed right beside my ear, low and tight. How many times now? When are you going to stop making
03:36this harder than it has to be? Lie still. I said lie still. I bit down through the inside of
03:41my
03:41cheek and swallowed. The doorbell rang. While their attention snapped to the front door,
03:45I covered my mouth with one hand and moved fast down the hall to the bathroom. I turned the faucet
03:50on
03:50cold and held my wrists under it. Forced air in and out. On the shelf above the sink. My father's
03:55razor sat in its stand. I couldn't stop looking at it. The thought arrived the way it always did,
03:59quiet, measured, like it was just presenting facts. You know how fast it would be. From wanting to come
04:05home to wanting to die. The distance was exactly 3 years. I tried before, in that place. A knotted
04:10towel from the bathroom rack. A basin full of water. I tried both. The consequences of being found were
04:16worse than what I've been trying to escape. A lot worse. So eventually I stopped trying. That didn't
04:20mean I wanted to live. What grew instead was something else entirely. Stay alive long enough to get out.
04:25Make your death loud enough to tear the walls down. Julian? My mother's voice from the hallway.
04:30We're about to head out. You okay in there? I set the razor back in the stand. Opened the door.
04:34She
04:35was waiting in the hall with a scarf folded over her arm. It's below freezing out there. She wrapped
04:39it around my neck and tucked the ends in, smoothing my collar as she went. I made this. Kept starting
04:45over because I kept dropping stitches. Her fingers tracked down toward my collar. Half an inch lower and
04:50she would have felt them. The scars. The new ones pressed over the old ones that never fully healed.
04:55Would you cry, mom? Or would you find a way to decide I'd brought it on myself?
04:59The Harmon family is already down by the river. She said, turning me toward the door. They headed
05:03out a few minutes ago. A name surfaced from somewhere I'd stopped looking. Avery. Quick eyes. Kind
05:09voice. The kind of person who made you feel like the room was slightly better organized for having her
05:13in it. We had a plan, a long time ago, before everything, to go see the snow in Berlin together.
05:18That version of me is so far away I can barely make out his outline.
05:22The last time I saw her she was just a kid. Now she's, she's so grown up and gorgeous.
05:27She's really made something of herself. My mother caught herself and pivoted.
05:31Julian, I know you were planning to study abroad. Your dad has already been looking into options.
05:35After the new year you can start the application process again. You'll have a fresh start.
05:39Mom, I don't have a future anymore. Everyone around us was bright faced and loud,
05:43turned toward the water, toward midnight. A young couple passed and handed out sparklers,
05:47calling, happy new year, to anyone within reach. My parents and Clara called it back.
05:52A sparkler ended up in my hand. You haven't had one of these forever, right? Clara said.
05:57Take all three. I want you to have them. My mother nudged my father.
06:02Remember how he used to chase you around the backyard with those when he was little?
06:05My father smiled, a real one, not the careful kind, and pulled out his lighter. Go ahead.
06:10I walked a few feet ahead of them and turned back. Lit the first one. The spark burst gold and
06:14red
06:15between us, and through the light I watched their faces. Three years. Three visits. First year,
06:20Clara came alone. I cried on the back of her hand. I said please ask them to come get me.
06:24Please. I'll do anything they want. Please. She looked at the ground.
06:28I tried, Julian. Dad says you have to complete the full three year program. That's the rule.
06:34Everyone around us was bright faced and loud, turned toward the water, toward midnight. A young
06:39couple passed and handed out sparklers, calling, happy new year, to anyone within reach. My parents
06:44and Clara called it back. A sparkler ended up in my hand. You haven't had one of these forever,
06:49right? Clara said. Take all three. I want you to have them. My mother nudged my father. Remember how he
06:56used to chase you around the backyard with those when he was little? My father smiled, a real one,
07:00not the careful kind, and pulled out his lighter. Go ahead. I walked a few feet ahead of them and
07:05turned back. Lit the first one. The spark burst gold and red between us, and through the light I
07:10watched their faces. Three years. Three visits. First year, Clara came alone. I cried on the back
07:15of her hand. I said please ask them to come get me. Please. I'll do anything they want. Please.
07:20She looked at the ground. I tried, Julian. Dad says you have to complete the full three year program.
07:27That's the rule. Three years. Three visits. First year, Clara came alone. I cried on the back of her
07:33hand. I said please ask them to come get me. Please. I'll do anything they want. Please. She looked at
07:39the ground. I tried, Julian. Dad says you have to complete the full three year program. That's the
07:45rule. Second year, my mother came. I grabbed the sleeve of her coat and wouldn't let go. I said take
07:50me home. I'll be perfect. I swear I will. I'm dying here. I mean that literally. Please.
07:55She pried my hands off without looking at me while she did it. You're doing so well. Finish
08:00the program and we'll be there the day you graduate. Third year. My father said Clara was
08:04almost done with school. I'd be out soon. Everything was going to be fine. Julian Quinn
08:08was already gone by then. The boys standing in front of them was just whatever was left.
08:12Breathing. Upright. Waiting. The third sparkler faded out. My parents were still talking behind
08:17me. Laughing at something. I took one step back. Then another. Then I turned toward the bridge
08:22and started walking. My feet felt lighter with every block. Almost there. Almost over.
08:27Long time no see Julian Quinn. The voice came from behind me. Clear and warm and completely
08:31wrong for this moment. I stopped. She came around to face me since I wasn't turning.
08:36Long time no see Julian Quinn. The voice came from behind me. Clear and warm and completely
08:41wrong for this moment. I stopped. She came around to face me since I wasn't turning.
08:45You're not even gonna look at me? Avery's voice was a little older than I remembered.
08:49More settled. I stared at the logo on her sweatshirt. I didn't have the strength to
08:53raise my eyes. She held out a lit sparkler between us. I heard you might be looking at
08:57programs abroad again. She said. Keeping her voice easy. What is it? I saved all my old
09:01application materials. Everything. The whole package. I could bring it over tomorrow morning.
09:05I meant to say don't bother. My mouth stayed shut. I'll come find you in the morning.
09:10The snow in Berlin. She said. Quieter. It's everything we said it would be. You'll come and see it
09:15eventually right? Something hit me so hard in the chest I couldn't breathe. She still remembered.
09:20She was asking like it was still possible. My eyes burned. I had been completely certain I had
09:24nothing left to cry with. Someone called her name from the path. She glanced back. Then at me.
09:29That's my dad. Tomorrow morning. Okay. She walked back toward the lights. I stood there with the sparkler
09:34burning down to nothing in my hand. Why now? Why does someone have to show up right now and tell
09:39me
09:39she still remembers? My parents' voices carried over the crowd. Where did Julian go? Fireworks are
09:46starting. He's fine. He's been too isolated to go far. He'll find us when the crowds thin out. Mom.
09:52My envelope was really that thin though. Clara. My father's sharper. Do you understand what this
09:58family gave up for your education? We sent Julian away. We handed you those years. He's home now.
10:03And we make it right. That's the end of it. The world went completely quiet. Sacrificed.
10:08We handed you those years. I had spent three years telling myself it was a miscalculation.
10:12A terrible mistake made by people who genuinely didn't know better. They knew exactly what they
10:16were choosing between. They chose her. They sent me to that place so Clara would have a clean record
10:21for her college applications. So nothing from our family would complicate her admissions file.
10:25The noise around me disappeared. The faces blurred into streaks of light. I walked. I reached the
10:30bridge. I closed my eyes. I let go of the railing. And I fell. The water hit like concrete from
10:36a
10:36hundred feet. Cold forced itself into my lungs and the pain was unlike anything. Total and absolute.
10:41My body fought without instruction. But underneath the pain. Underneath everything. Something
10:45unclenched. A feeling I hadn't felt in three years. Release. The cold went dark. I thought I would keep
10:51sinking. Then I wasn't sinking. I was floating. The cheering from the riverbanks had stopped.
10:55A different sound was spreading through the crowd.
10:57Someone jumped off the bridge. Are you serious right now? Call 911. Did somebody call 911?
11:03The fireworks show cut off mid-sequence. Emergency crew started pushing people back from the water.
11:08A searchlight swept the surface. My mother's hand-knit scarf floated up, bright against the
11:13dark water, exactly where I'd gone in. A rescue diver found me by it. They pulled me out. CPR on
11:18the dock.
11:19Gurney. Ambulance. Lights running. At the ER. The trauma team worked on me for over 40 minutes.
11:24The attending physician stepped outside and found the officer on scene.
11:28Officer, this wasn't a clean drowning. The body has extensive scarring. Old and new. Multiple
11:32locations. Non-drowning injuries. Pre-existing. Significant. I'm required by law to flag this
11:38as a mandatory report. This goes to your sergeant before next of kin is contacted.
11:41My consciousness drifted back across the city to the apartment. My mother was pacing the living room
11:45in her coat. Still wearing it. My father sat on the couch with his hands pressed flat against his knees.
11:51It's been 90 minutes. He's making a point.
11:53His voice was controlled. Covering something else underneath. He's not gonna do something drastic.
11:58My mother didn't answer. The Harmon girl said she saw him walking toward the bridge. She's been
12:02texting. He doesn't have a key. He'll be back when he gets cold. Two blocks away, my mother's scarf
12:09was sealed in an evidence bag. The doorbell rang. Two officers. One detective. Are you the family of
12:15Julian Quinn? My mother's hand stayed on the door handle. Her voice came out in fragments.
12:19That's... Yes, he's my son. What happened?
12:22At approximately 11.48 PM, Julian Quinn jumped from the pedestrian bridge over Riverside. He was
12:27recovered by water rescue and transported to Mercy General, where despite full resuscitatory
12:32efforts, he was pronounced dead at 1.17 AM.
12:35My mother's legs simply stopped holding her. She hit the floor and stayed there. My father
12:39tried to stand and couldn't manage it. She looked up at him from where she'd fallen. No words,
12:43just her face, and what was on it had no single name. The detective allowed them exactly one breath.
12:48I'm deeply sorry for your loss. I also need to inform you. The attending physician filed a mandatory
12:53report tonight. Your son's body has significant non-accidental injuries. Multiple sites, multiple
12:58stages of healing. The medical examiner is conducting a full forensic workup, and this is now an active
13:02investigation. We're going to need your full cooperation.
13:05Clara threw herself in front of the detective. She was shaking so hard her words came out broken.
13:09You have the wrong family. My brother wouldn't... He wouldn't do this. Please tell me you have the
13:15wrong person. The detective set a photograph on the table. My mother's scarf. My jacket. Clara looked at
13:21them for three full seconds. Then she turned toward my bedroom door. The detective was already moving.
13:26May I? I stayed still. I knew what was in there. The note and the written account. Every name.
13:30Every detail. Every incident I could document in the months I spent preparing for this night.
13:35I had planned that part as carefully as everything else. I wanted it found. I needed it found.
13:39The notebook and the folded pages came out from under my mattress, sealed into evidence bags one by
13:44one. My father pulled himself upright. His face had caved in. Please. His voice came out wrong,
13:49flattened. Like something behind it had been cut. Where is he? Take me to where he is.
13:56Please. Please. Once. Just let me see my son once. Please.
14:00You'll see him. But first, all three of you need to come to the station with us. Tonight. The squad
14:05car was parked outside with its lights running. Neighbors had gathered on the sidewalk. My parents
14:10and Clara walked through the crowd to the car. Avery was standing on the sidewalk. She grabbed
14:14Clara's arm. What's happening? Where is Julian? What's going on? He jumped off the bridge tonight,
14:22sweetheart. I'm so sorry. Avery went completely still. In front of her, a police car, three
14:30shattered people, and every face around her confirming the same thing. She knew I was gone.
14:34I'm sorry, Avery. I meant to say something to you tonight. I never got the chance.
14:39The station's conference room. My mother was still crying, had not stopped. The same two lines cycling
14:44through what was left of her voice. Where is my son? Please let me see him. Where is he? My
14:48father sat
14:49with his head down. He looked like he had aged two decades between the apartment and this chair.
14:53A detective spread photographs across the table. Forensic documentation from the hospital.
14:57The injuries on my body, cataloged. My mother's hands flew up to cover her mouth.
15:02Julian. She barely made sound. What did they do to you?
15:05The second detective set the notebook on the table between them. My account. Three years of everything.
15:10According to your son's written statement and several witness accounts Julian was enrolled in a
15:14residential wilderness therapy program. Walk me through that decision. It was a behavioral modification
15:19program. Closed campus, structured residential environment. He stopped. He was showing what we
15:25believed were early signs of problematic digital attendancy. We wanted to intervene before it
15:31escalated. Mr. Quinn. Julian had no criminal record. No documented substance abuse. He was a college
15:39student with a clean academic history and no record of behavioral incidents prior to the enrollment date.
15:43He was 18 years old when you enrolled him. What specifically led you to choose a residential
15:48lockdown program over outpatient therapy? It was his decision. She looked at my father. Flat. No heat
15:55left in it. Just the fact. He said he'd researched the program. He told me he had visited the campus.
16:01He guaranteed me it was a safe environment. Patricia, I... Julian kept calling. Her voice started to come apart.
16:07He sent letters. He told us something was wrong. Over and over he told us. He begged us to come
16:12get him.
16:12And you told me he was playing us. You said he was testing boundaries. You said resistance to the
16:17program was part of the process. I didn't know. You didn't want to know. She struck him. Open palm.
16:22He was telling us the truth every single time. And you made me doubt him. You made me leave him
16:28there. I didn't know. You didn't want to know. She struck him. Open palm. He was telling us the truth
16:34every single time. And you made me doubt him. You made me leave him there. Clara's palms were bleeding.
16:39She'd been pressing her nails into them since the apartment
16:42She dropped to the floor in front of both of them
16:44It was me
16:45This happened because of me
16:47If they hadn't needed to clear the way
16:49My father came apart
16:50Not piece by piece
16:52All at once
16:52Like a load-bearing wall giving out
16:54He struck himself across the face
16:56Once, twice, a third time
16:58The sound of it flat and ugly in the small room
17:01I did this
17:02I put him there and I kept him there
17:03And I told myself it was the right decision
17:05And I did this
17:06Stop
17:06My mother's voice cut across all of it
17:09Stop talking
17:10I was in the corner of the room
17:11Watching
17:11My chest ached
17:13I had stopped hating them somewhere in year two
17:15When I realized that hatred burned fuel I didn't have left
17:17I wasn't here for revenge
17:19I was here because places like that don't stay open unless everyone around them
17:22The parents, the regulators, the neighbors
17:25Makes a collective choice not to look
17:26I needed someone to start looking
17:28A detective slapped his palm flat on the table
17:30Everyone in the room flinched
17:32This is not the time
17:33Right now you are gonna give us everything
17:35The enrollment paperwork, the contract
17:37Every piece of communication you receive from that facility
17:40Because we have a window
17:41And if we lose it
17:42This case gets exponentially harder
17:44Do you understand?
17:45The facility is about 90 miles north
17:47Rural county
17:49Three year minimum contract
17:51No unannounced visits
17:53No outside interference with their curriculum
17:55He was speaking mechanically now
17:56Reciting
17:57I have all the paperwork at home
17:59I have everything
18:00A third detective had been running the facility's registration records
18:03Not only was the academy legally registered
18:05It had appeared on a state-approved list of behavioral programs twice
18:08Past three consecutive inspections
18:10Because they always knew when inspections were coming
18:13We all did
18:14We learned very early what happened to anyone who didn't have the right answers ready when the visitors showed up
18:18By 4 a.m., a joint two-county operation was being coordinated
18:22No one authorized a leak
18:23By morning, my name was trending anyway
18:25The headline was short and got everything wrong
18:2726-year-old jumps from Riverside Bridge on New Year's Eve
18:31Mental health crisis or something more
18:32The comment section filled the way it always does
18:35Who jumps in front of a crowd during fireworks?
18:37That's pure theater
18:38That's wanting attention
18:39Always something dramatic behind these things
18:41Couldn't handle real life
18:43His parents invested years trying to help him and this is how he repays them
18:46Some people are just determined to self-destruct
18:48Probably debt
18:49Saw something like this last year
18:51The theories multiplied
18:52He'd had a breakdown
18:53He'd gambled everything away online
18:55He had a drug problem
18:57His parents were blameless victims of an ungrateful son
18:59My parents and Clara watched all of it and couldn't say a single word
19:03Because the detectives had been explicit
19:04Any public statement would compromise the operation before it was ready
19:08Then a post appeared on X from a verified account with a Berlin University affiliation
19:12My name is Avery
19:13The young man who died on New Year's Eve was my best friend growing up
19:16The Julian I knew once bought every item off a street vendor's cart on a cold December night
19:20Just so the man could close up and go home
19:23And gave everything to the sanitation crew working the block
19:25He gave up a paid research placement to spend a semester tutoring kids in a rural district
19:29Three hours from home
19:30Because he said those schools had no one else coming
19:33I don't know what happened to him in these last three years
19:35But I know who he was before
19:37He doesn't deserve what's being said about him right now
19:39Please stop
19:40Give the truth time to surface
19:41Give him that much
19:42The comment section shifted
19:44Not immediately
19:45Not completely
19:46But it moved
19:47If she's defending him this hard
19:48There's something else going on here
19:50I'm waiting for actual information before I say anything else
19:53Who was this guy?
19:54Really?
19:54I watched her words on the screen
19:56Something ached in whatever I still had left to feel with
19:58When everyone else was building a story out of nothing
20:01She remembered who I actually was
20:03She stood up and said my name like it meant something
20:05And the last thing I left her was this
20:07I'm sorry, Avery
20:08Just before dawn, the operation moved
20:10Officers arrived at the academy campus before the morning staff shift
20:1447 employees detained before a single phone could be reached
20:18312 residents
20:19Some of them ran toward the officers the moment the doors opened
20:22Some stood in the doorway and didn't move, didn't speak
20:24Just looked out with that flat, thousand yard stare I recognized from the inside of my own skull
20:29The equipment was brought out in daylight, in front of cameras
20:32Restraint boards
20:33Electrical devices
20:34The tools they used that were designed not to leave marks
20:37Unless you fought back hard enough
20:38I had fought back
20:39Every arrest was photographed
20:41Every piece of equipment cataloged
20:43By mid-morning it was on every major outlet
20:45The original comments disappeared
20:47In their place
20:47Julian Quinn
20:48Rest easy
20:49Thank you for opening that door
20:51I hope wherever you are
20:52You're finally free
20:53We should have looked sooner
20:54I'm sorry we didn't look sooner
20:56The replies to Avery's post filled with the same thing
20:58Over and over
20:59I watched my mother from across the parking lot
21:01When officers led the academy's director out in handcuffs past the cameras
21:05She broke away from the officer beside her before anyone could react
21:08She crossed the distance in seconds
21:10She hit the director with everything she had
21:12Both hands, voice past language, past anything organized
21:15Give him back
21:18Give me my son back
21:20He was 17 years old when you got him
21:24He was 17
21:25Later, at the hospital, they let the family in
21:28My mother walked to the table and put both hands on either side of my face
21:32She stood there for a long time without moving
21:34You can be angry at me
21:35You should be angry
21:38I'll carry that for the rest of my life
21:41Clara knelt beside her and wrapped both arms around my arm and didn't say anything at all
21:45Her shoulders shook so hard she looked like she might come apart
21:48My father stood apart from both of them
21:50He struck himself across the face
21:52Once, twice, sounds coming out of him that didn't form words
21:55I did this
21:56He said, over and over
21:57This is what I did
21:58My parents separated before the year was out, quietly
22:01With the particular exhaustion of two people who had burned through everything they had
22:05And come out the other side with nothing left but wreckage
22:07They sold the house and most of what was in it
22:09The money went to a trauma recovery organization
22:12The one that provided long-term psychiatric care for survivors of residential behavioral programs
22:16My father said it was the only thing he could think to do that was real
22:19Clara quit her job
22:21She took a position at a community center
22:23Physical, long hours work
22:24The kind that doesn't leave enough space in your head for anything else to grow
22:27Her paychecks went to the rural tutoring program where I'd volunteered
22:30Every month, no exceptions
22:32My mother went to the cemetery every week
22:34Sometimes twice
22:35She brought flowers, sat until the light changed
22:38And talked to me the way she had when I was very small
22:41Just talking, about nothing in particular, filling in the quiet
22:44She leaned back against the headstone and said very softly
22:47Julian, I miss you so much
22:50Can I just sit here with you for a while?
22:53I was beside her
22:54I had been beside her the whole time
22:55Mom, I forgave you a long time ago
22:58I wasn't sure that was what was keeping me here
23:00But when I said it, even in silence
23:02Even to someone who couldn't hear
23:03Something in me loosened
23:04Thunder moved low across the sky
23:06Distant and slow
23:07My mother looked up
23:09Is that you?
23:09She said
23:10Telling me to go?
23:11She stood carefully
23:12Patted the top of the headstone once
23:14Alright, I'll be back soon
23:16She walked down the path and didn't look back
23:18I sat with the quiet for a while
23:20Then a black umbrella came around the corner
23:22Avery
23:22She stopped when she saw the grave
23:24Stood there for a moment before she came any closer
23:27She set two things down at the base of the stone
23:29A bunch of iris flowers
23:30And a small glass bottle
23:32That's snow
23:34From Berlin
23:35I know it melted
23:37But I brought it anyway
23:38I'm going back
23:40I can't stay here anymore
23:41Every street in this city has you on it
23:43I keep turning corners expecting to see you
23:45I keep thinking if I had pushed harder
23:47If I had tracked down where they sent you
23:49And showed up at the door
23:50She pressed her fingertips to the engraving of my name
23:52I'm sorry I didn't
23:54The rain came back
23:55Fine
23:56Thin
23:56Barely there
23:57She stood up
23:58She looked at the headstone one last time
24:00Have a better one next time
24:01She said
24:02Wherever you end up
24:03Have a better one
24:04She turned and walked back down the path through the grey morning
24:06I watched her until she was gone
24:08If there is a next time
24:09I said to no one
24:10And you're in it
24:11I'll come
24:12The world went soft at the edges
24:13The last wait
24:14The very last of it
24:15Let go
24:16I wasn't holding on to anything anymore
24:18I went
24:18I went
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