#fullmovie #engsub #tvseries #trending2026 #dramaseries #romancemovies #fullhd #The Miniature Wife S01E01 2 (2026) | Marriage Turns Into Unexpected Chaos ππ Full Episode
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00:00:05this is a love story love it's supposed to be patient and kind but let's be honest it's
00:00:16irrational it can make us crazy and sometimes downright insane i should know my husband made
00:00:25me small no it's not a metaphor he made me six inches tall i'm literally the size of a dry
00:00:42martini shaken stirred and nursing the burn of every sip even at our ugliest i still believe
00:00:53our love's worth fighting for but fair warning it's going to get worse before it gets better
00:01:05to us to us
00:01:13to recapturing magic to the journey not the destination and to dr. carmichael couples
00:01:20therapist extraordinaire to her words of wisdom
00:01:24it's speaking of the journey it was so bumpy
00:01:29yeah a few bottles yeah yeah checked into separate rooms um but i am working through my narcissistic
00:01:37tendencies and i am working on my accountability issues and here we are we made it got to the next
00:01:45stop dr carmichael's new year new us colon a grand gesture i'd like to go first okay great
00:02:01i've arranged to get the vermont gang back together at the gray house on new year's eve for our
00:02:06anniversary so we can renew our vows new year new us i'm speechless we were so happy there
00:02:20really really are gary and meg gonna be there they're giving up cabo
00:02:25lulu our daughter has not returned my call oh she's 18 she will they don't do phones always send a
00:02:30text okay okay my turn okay this will be the last christmas that we spend in st louis because i
00:02:39have listed our house with the contingency to run it back from the bio through next december
00:02:43i am going to land this big fish and tomorrow i'm going to get elf smith to bankroll the final
00:02:49stage of my life's work so that in one year lindy we can move back to the gray house permanently
00:02:56like i promised years ago a clean slate and a fresh start i supported you and you got your prize
00:03:04and
00:03:04all i ask is that for one more year you support me so i can get mine are you serious
00:03:11yes the listing went up today is this real very
00:03:29yes i love you lindy i love you too
00:03:42thank you thank you for inviting me back into our bed
00:03:50thank you thank you for inviting me back into our bed
00:04:09how does one solve the problem of feeding the world only less little john knows now what if we
00:04:18could take say an ear of corn and shrink it to a fraction of its original size just imagine a
00:04:26farmer
00:04:26could grow 10 100 a thousand ears of corn in the space it takes to grow one but how does
00:04:34cellular
00:04:34reduction work my revolutionary molecular transformation process fundamentally changes the distance between
00:04:41atoms oh the real question is can you restore the corn cob to regular size after it's been miniaturized
00:04:48not only can we do it we will do it together hilton smith we can make more with less
00:04:55and that's l e s i'll take it from here less okay
00:05:05now it's time to blow your minds
00:05:12you call this the mini barn card no one calls it that okay it's just me see i grew up
00:05:18on a farm
00:05:19richard i sorry i get excited
00:05:45you call this the future
00:06:02i am fucking amazed
00:06:08there's a corner there's a truck look how tiny it is it's being tiny it's incredible i got you i
00:06:14got you
00:06:15it's crazy oh it amazed me again make it big i want to taste it
00:06:22oh a big corn takes a big investment oh there he is money man chiming in oh go on uh
00:06:29you know uh flavor saver
00:06:30was a huge step forward it was the first and the best gmo tomato on the market but it was
00:06:37a failure
00:06:38well no it wasn't it was a breakthrough but it tasted like old band-aids admit it
00:06:44no i don't think i want it
00:06:48admit it or i walk
00:06:50no
00:06:51no
00:06:55fuck yeah you should never admit failure i got you
00:06:59yes you did hilton but this agrotech is going to change the world jinx
00:07:05and just think this is only the beginning sorry who are you vivian hilton's chief scientist
00:07:11i'm the guts i just write the checks she's the brains and my guts never make mistakes
00:07:17i mean i would write you a check right now but for some reason i'm just not feeling yummy in
00:07:26my tummy
00:07:29you
00:07:29you
00:07:30me
00:07:31who are you
00:07:33is this a true question
00:07:34i don't know is it
00:07:36well who are you
00:07:38i'm awesome i'm hilton
00:07:40well i'm awesome i'm less
00:07:44yeah i'm gonna need more
00:07:52you like it
00:07:54yeah i'm gonna lose my house
00:08:13hey
00:08:14hey
00:08:15hey
00:08:16uh something quietly revealed itself to me
00:08:20oh what's that
00:08:21maria's staff pick
00:08:23my rainbow starts with black
00:08:25it's a Pulitzer Prize winning novel
00:08:27by the one
00:08:28the only
00:08:29lindy mcmichael
00:08:31little john
00:08:31that's a
00:08:33lifetime ago
00:08:34uh-uh
00:08:35eighteen years and still a fanfave
00:08:37listen richie
00:08:38um
00:08:40we need to talk
00:08:42uh-oh
00:08:43no
00:08:44yeah
00:08:45no we've just begun
00:08:47richie
00:08:47hold on
00:08:48this is just the first act
00:08:49and not turn this into a tragedy
00:08:52tragedy
00:08:52tragedy's a better story
00:08:54oh i wish they had a section on how to repair an emotional affair
00:08:59listen
00:09:00listen
00:09:01you really saw me
00:09:01when i needed it the most
00:09:03i do
00:09:04yeah
00:09:04and
00:09:06and you really gave me that emotional intimacy that i craved you know
00:09:10mm-hmm
00:09:11you were a great shoulder
00:09:13an ear
00:09:13mm-hmm
00:09:14you're so handsome
00:09:16young
00:09:17smart
00:09:17don't stop it
00:09:18and maybe in another life
00:09:20but
00:09:21but i fell in love
00:09:24and you
00:09:25i fell in less
00:09:27hell yes
00:09:28why
00:09:30less knows the real me
00:09:31the worst of me
00:09:33and he
00:09:33he still loves me
00:09:35i could love the worst of you
00:09:37no
00:09:37he has twenty years on you
00:09:39and you've known me like a few months
00:09:41six and a half
00:09:43less
00:09:45he made a grand gesture
00:09:46and he promised me
00:09:48a fresh start
00:09:49and i believe him
00:09:50why
00:09:51no no no
00:09:53actually don't say
00:09:54love should remain
00:09:55a mystery
00:09:57my mom told me that
00:09:59okay
00:10:00i'm gonna go
00:10:01just
00:10:02wait
00:10:02wait
00:10:03this
00:10:03oh god no no no
00:10:05i got you this christmas present
00:10:06absolutely cannot accept this
00:10:07you must or it means our love was in vain
00:10:10shh shh
00:10:10not love
00:10:10okay okay
00:10:11just open the card first
00:10:13there is no need to thank me
00:10:16okay
00:10:16okay
00:10:31merry christmas my love
00:10:33in anticipation of the new year
00:10:35new you and new us
00:10:37i thought this would be a great start
00:10:39open the present
00:10:40i'll wait
00:10:52i hate this rag
00:10:53i know you hate this rag
00:10:55but i knew you'd never send it in yourself
00:10:57give it a quick read
00:10:58see if you recognize it
00:11:02oh richie
00:11:04no no no no what have you done
00:11:06i present it to be your book ages
00:11:08your story is gonna be in the new yorker
00:11:12no
00:11:12i didn't write this
00:11:14i'm fucked
00:11:15i know it's overwhelming and i'm sure you don't
00:11:19oh fuck richie
00:11:21no no no no
00:11:23oh my fuck
00:11:24oh shit shit shit shit shit
00:11:26oh bitch pick up pick up
00:11:28hi this is terry leave a message
00:11:30terry
00:11:31oh fuck
00:11:32oh fuck
00:11:32okay
00:11:32there is a story
00:11:34there's a story in the new yorker with my name on it
00:11:36and i need you to call me back
00:11:37this is an emergency
00:11:38for serious this time call me back
00:11:42oh fuck
00:11:44fuck
00:11:53shut the door
00:11:54why
00:11:55because i want to raise my voice
00:11:58jesus jumping crackers
00:11:59why
00:12:00would you invite hilton
00:12:02to your charity event
00:12:04at your home tonight
00:12:05because he wants to know who i am
00:12:06but lindy will be there
00:12:08and
00:12:08i'm sorry
00:12:09am i the only one that remembers
00:12:10last year
00:12:11the the the silent auction
00:12:13the pool incident
00:12:14and you're still serving alcohol this year right
00:12:16count me out
00:12:17i'm sorry
00:12:18i cannot watch
00:12:21i don't think
00:12:22that my heart or my stomach
00:12:24can tolerate another interaction with him
00:12:27but
00:12:27we are broke
00:12:28and here's all we have
00:12:30there are no more interested investors less
00:12:34with hilton's kind of cash
00:12:36you know what
00:12:37lindy and i are fine now
00:12:38we're good even
00:12:39and
00:12:40we're renewing our vows
00:12:41new year
00:12:42new us
00:12:42yes you said that last year
00:12:44this year it's gonna stick
00:12:45you sleeping in the same bed
00:12:46yes
00:12:47just sleeping
00:12:48sleeping plus
00:12:49big plus
00:12:50small plus
00:12:52it feels so much better if it was big
00:12:54we're on the road to big
00:12:55i promise you
00:12:55um okay
00:12:58lindy it's me
00:12:59it's me calling you
00:13:00um i'm not panicking
00:13:01but just call me back
00:13:02before the party okay
00:13:03it's not an emergency
00:13:04but it's an emergency
00:13:06oh
00:13:06i'm so sorry sir
00:13:07um
00:13:08my uh my polyp is gone
00:13:10yeah
00:13:10but there's a hole in my heart now
00:13:12sounds like a case for the bard's guard
00:13:14so i'll be unable to attend your party this evening
00:13:17our loss
00:13:17good luck richard
00:13:41you're not jackie
00:13:42i'm hell
00:13:43don't make me raise it
00:13:45who are you
00:13:46i'm professor little john
00:13:47jackie's professor
00:13:48did she leave for break already
00:13:49have i missed her
00:13:50i hope not because i'm her fucking ride
00:13:53jackie
00:13:53professor little john
00:13:55yeah
00:13:55lindy
00:13:55you should call me lindy
00:13:57oh uh hell
00:13:58uh professor little john is the reason that i'm here
00:14:02oh you wrote that book she loves
00:14:04i didn't read it
00:14:05no offense
00:14:06none taken jackie
00:14:07i'm so glad i caught you
00:14:08can we talk
00:14:09yeah
00:14:10just real quick
00:14:11oh you mean without me
00:14:13i do
00:14:14oh
00:14:14is it okay
00:14:15oh yeah
00:14:15is it rude no offense but
00:14:17sure okay
00:14:18let's just have a
00:14:19okay
00:14:20um
00:14:23have i done something wrong professor little john
00:14:25oh no no gosh no
00:14:27no i have
00:14:28i have
00:14:30i um
00:14:32i need to tell you something
00:14:33uh
00:14:37i loved your short story
00:14:41untitled on purpose
00:14:41that's the one
00:14:42yeah i loved it
00:14:43it was brilliant
00:14:44uh
00:14:45the prose was incisive
00:14:47oh
00:14:47just the voice
00:14:48fresh
00:14:49distinguished
00:14:50rare
00:14:50one that deserves the attention
00:14:53of the new york literati
00:14:56i mean
00:14:57that
00:14:58that means the world to me
00:15:00professor little john
00:15:01it's almost it's almost christmas
00:15:02and you're at my door
00:15:02complimenting my work i
00:15:03oh my gosh i couldn't ask for a better
00:15:05okay listen to me
00:15:06listen to me
00:15:06yes
00:15:07you need to turn it into a novel
00:15:09right now
00:15:11now
00:15:13really
00:15:13really now
00:15:14mm-hmm
00:15:15um
00:15:16i guess i could get started over the break
00:15:19no you need to take next semester off
00:15:20and just write
00:15:21the whole
00:15:23semester
00:15:23the whole semester
00:15:24you just want to isolate
00:15:26and write
00:15:27while it's fresh
00:15:28while it's here
00:15:28while untitled on purpose is
00:15:30coursing through you
00:15:32right
00:15:32yes i feel it
00:15:33okay so you need to isolate and write
00:15:35uh no distractions
00:15:36no internet
00:15:37no novels
00:15:38no magazines
00:15:39no uh
00:15:40nothing
00:15:40nothing
00:15:41and just all winter long
00:15:43very a room of one's own
00:15:45right
00:15:45wolf it
00:15:45right
00:15:46wolf it
00:15:47could you do that
00:15:48yes
00:15:48well how's dad my uncle flip
00:15:50he has a cabin back in montana
00:15:52that's super isolated
00:15:53oh
00:15:54well then pond isolated
00:15:55that's perfect
00:15:56right
00:15:56yes
00:15:56jackie
00:15:57yeah
00:15:58this has the potential to be
00:16:00your
00:16:01my rainbow starts with black
00:16:03no
00:16:05professor little john
00:16:06it it couldn't
00:16:07jackie
00:16:08i should know
00:16:09my goal
00:16:10in life
00:16:12is to just write
00:16:12one
00:16:14one great novel
00:16:15like you
00:16:16that's okay
00:16:17so we're great
00:16:18you're gonna isolate and write
00:16:20yes
00:16:20all semester
00:16:21all semester
00:16:22you're going to montana
00:16:23yes
00:16:24remember no magazines
00:16:25right no
00:16:25you don't want any?
00:16:27turn off the internet
00:16:28okay
00:16:29i will unplug completely
00:16:31yes
00:16:32okay hey
00:16:33merry christmas
00:16:34merry christmas
00:16:35to you too
00:16:59oh
00:17:00terry
00:17:01thank
00:17:01christ
00:17:02okay listen
00:17:03i
00:17:05blindsiding me with one short story published in the new yorker over the last two decades gets you one
00:17:09the fact that we've been friends for more than 20 years gets you another and the other eight belong to
00:17:13gilliam flynn
00:17:14he continues to publish bestsellers which bought me a classic six off the park
00:17:18i didn't write the story
00:17:20i didn't write the story
00:17:20i didn't write the story it's my students work
00:17:24my ex emotional lover
00:17:26long story
00:17:27found the fucking story in my bag and thought it was mine and i why would i correct him you
00:17:32know
00:17:33he sent it in
00:17:35without my knowledge on my behalf because he long story adored me and thought i was capable of writing something
00:17:41great again i'm taking a sabbatical from wash you i'm headed to the gray house les and i are going
00:17:47to renew our vows
00:17:48long story
00:17:49you're invited
00:17:49i know you hate him
00:17:51i did too
00:17:52but
00:17:52he has a good dad
00:17:54and i'm committed
00:17:56to committing to my marriage
00:17:57so
00:17:58i cannot handle
00:18:00this shit storm
00:18:01right now
00:18:02which is sure
00:18:02by the way to tarnish your reputation as well
00:18:05so if you want to keep
00:18:06that classic six
00:18:07then can you please
00:18:08please
00:18:10fix this fucking mess
00:18:11so i can focus on my vows and my marriage like i promised
00:18:15i hate you
00:18:16i know
00:18:17i hate me too
00:18:20thank you
00:18:21no no you're not allowed to thank me
00:18:28oliver
00:18:47les has been calling i've been texting
00:18:49and i have been busy
00:18:50les needs you
00:18:51on best behavior tonight
00:18:53hilton smith is attending
00:18:55condescending as always starla
00:18:56and who
00:18:58necessary
00:18:58and he is a big investor
00:19:00you know
00:19:01i thought the cover was on the pool last year
00:19:03right you know that
00:19:04great
00:19:04you already picked up the first frame to me
00:19:06i did
00:19:06yep
00:19:07it's locked
00:19:08i know
00:19:10is this another party protest
00:19:11no
00:19:11hilton is here in five
00:19:13samara
00:19:14your dress is upstairs
00:19:14i need you inside
00:19:15now
00:19:16what dress
00:19:17let me assess your wardrobe situation
00:19:18and we both agreed that the only option was to outsource an upgrade
00:19:22insulting
00:19:24and what if i hate it
00:19:25your futures
00:19:26are on the line
00:19:27he said to me
00:19:28quote
00:19:28no new year new us without new money
00:19:31unquote
00:19:32quote
00:19:32so please
00:19:33just move
00:19:34get out of the car
00:19:36now
00:19:37goodbye starla
00:19:38i will
00:19:40have the valet
00:19:41physically
00:19:42remove you
00:19:43i need a minute
00:19:46one minute
00:19:49you need a hulk out front
00:19:51stat
00:20:19come on
00:20:20come on
00:20:20tell me what les is working on
00:20:21this is the cover of scientific american
00:20:24he tells me nothing
00:20:26and you never ask
00:20:28bullshit let me
00:20:29i have printed that same quote from you ten times over
00:20:32the years
00:20:32all i'll say is first rule of fight club
00:20:34lame
00:20:36and outdated
00:20:37just like scientific american
00:20:49vodka dry
00:20:57oh thank you
00:21:07big red has landed
00:21:09where's lindy
00:21:10i need eyes on lady tomato
00:21:12help me
00:21:13give me a twenty on deep pockets
00:21:16double negative
00:21:16big red is not happy
00:21:18i know amazing style when i see it
00:21:21ugh
00:21:22this is a facade
00:21:23oh well the facade is wicked
00:21:27i'm
00:21:27i'm
00:21:28teetering on the precipice of being outed as a fraud
00:21:31which i probably deserve
00:21:34i'm supposed to be
00:21:35the supportive wife
00:21:37but uh
00:21:39my career going up in flames is banging around my brain
00:21:42that's all i can hear
00:21:43what does your husband think about that
00:21:45oh he has no clue
00:21:46he's a fraud too
00:21:49is that so
00:21:52welcome everyone
00:21:54uh
00:21:55every year
00:21:56um i say i'm gonna keep it short
00:21:58and that this night is not about me
00:22:00it's about
00:22:00the children
00:22:02and tonight i'm actually gonna keep that promise
00:22:04but you know let's be honest
00:22:06um it has to be about me first
00:22:08because you're all here to bid on my stuff
00:22:10haha
00:22:11well he's just
00:22:13playing the role of a charitable
00:22:16philanthropist
00:22:17but all he really cares about is his life's work
00:22:20first
00:22:21himself second
00:22:22our daughter third
00:22:23me last
00:22:24which i probably deserve
00:22:25well just curious
00:22:27what do you think about his life's work
00:22:30and a very personal little ditty about jack and diane
00:22:34my john cougar melancamp velcro wallet
00:22:37with my high school id
00:22:39still inside
00:22:40huh
00:22:40where else you gonna get one of those
00:22:43i can't tell you that
00:22:46it's so top secret i actually have no idea what it is
00:22:49oh
00:22:50hold on a second my my top elf is really trying to tell me something
00:22:53maybe tomato on the brand of deep pockets two drinks and third on deck
00:22:56you're fucking joking or you're fucking fired
00:22:59i'll turn on the headset
00:23:03but i can tell you
00:23:06he's brilliant
00:23:08don't tell him i said that
00:23:10yeah
00:23:11i mean i'm already last you know what's after last
00:23:15how much
00:23:16so yeah
00:23:18merry christmas and happy holidays and uh
00:23:21hopefully that covers it all okay
00:23:26what's
00:23:27five minutes
00:23:27no two
00:23:28one later maybe
00:23:29done
00:23:30oh everybody was out
00:23:31you remember
00:23:31no no i'm just explaining to this gentleman why there's no outdoor access this holiday season
00:23:36so as a joke last year i put into the silent auction as a joke
00:23:40watch almighty less walk on water i thought the cover was on the pool
00:23:46oh
00:23:48i just want to say i'm so sorry
00:23:51well i pay right now to see that
00:23:53awesome
00:23:54less
00:23:54if you can walk on water
00:23:56you got my money
00:23:58are you being serious
00:24:00no
00:24:00no
00:24:01oh great so i can still get the money
00:24:04after the conversation with your wife
00:24:06uh
00:24:08i
00:24:08i don't know
00:24:09hi hilton i didn't know
00:24:10okay lady why don't you just not say anything and maybe go and get us a lot of drinks
00:24:16okay so um hilton i don't know what she said
00:24:18well she said that you put work first family third and her did last
00:24:22that's out of context
00:24:24what kind of man are you
00:24:25i know i just i can't explain
00:24:27i can't
00:24:30you never explain anything
00:24:33i got you again
00:24:35again
00:24:36you suck at it
00:24:37i do i do i do
00:24:38so just to be clear lindy didn't tank the deal
00:24:40she closed it
00:24:41now she's awesome
00:24:44workaholics
00:24:45they changed the world
00:24:46i'm a workaholic
00:24:47i should know
00:24:48thank you
00:24:49thank you so much
00:24:50thank you so much
00:24:51i want to go to work right away
00:24:52like fuck the holidays
00:24:53yeah
00:24:53put on my christmas card every year
00:24:55yeah you really see me
00:24:56we both do
00:24:57oh it's you again
00:24:58hilton's chief scientist
00:25:00oh the brains
00:25:01and the boots
00:25:02the boots
00:25:03the boots on the ground
00:25:04what do the boots do
00:25:05the boots ensure that my guts are never wrong
00:25:09the boots are part of the deal
00:25:11i'm all in
00:25:12are you
00:25:13awesome
00:25:14less
00:25:21fine just
00:25:22just tell me
00:25:23i'm melting down
00:25:24because i fucked the deal
00:25:26no i closed the deal
00:25:27i closed the deal
00:25:28fantastic
00:25:29no
00:25:29what do you mean no
00:25:30that's so great
00:25:31oh my god i was so worried
00:25:33no
00:25:34now i am saddled with one of hilton's network of bio spies
00:25:38his chief scientist is going to come in and she's going to take credit for my work
00:25:42and all of this will have been for nothing
00:25:43i will be nothing
00:25:45my legacy will be nothing
00:25:47i shall go to the grave without a nobel
00:25:49you know this was my last chance at greatness
00:25:53god
00:25:54hey hey hey hey hey hey hey
00:25:59come on you remember joan ryan
00:26:03huh
00:26:04yeah
00:26:05my nemesis at mit
00:26:06that's right
00:26:07you were convinced
00:26:09that the phd board was going to
00:26:11pick her over you
00:26:12and you were going to be
00:26:13relegated to just a footnote in the science community
00:26:16or some other science bad thing right
00:26:17but what
00:26:19actually happened les
00:26:21they chose me
00:26:23they chose you
00:26:25and where's joan ryan
00:26:27teaching at berkeley
00:26:30and where are you
00:26:32in st louis
00:26:33but why
00:26:34oh uh
00:26:36to give the finger to those ungrateful pricks at monsanto
00:26:39and to build the menlo park of the midwest
00:26:42and how
00:26:42how because i am i am a partner in my own company
00:26:45creating the bio agro tech that will change the world
00:26:48that's right
00:26:48yeah
00:26:48you're gonna change the world
00:26:52and you are
00:26:54i've always believed that
00:26:55even when you hated me
00:26:57oh
00:27:00especially when i hated you
00:27:02so what do i do
00:27:04you do what you always do
00:27:06you get back in the workshop
00:27:09and you figure it out
00:27:11that's what les little john does
00:27:13yeah
00:27:14right
00:27:14yeah
00:27:16right
00:27:16okay
00:27:17oh
00:27:18okay
00:27:20that's it
00:27:22that's it
00:27:22thank you lady
00:27:23thank you for being so
00:27:25understanding
00:27:27oh god
00:27:29so now i gotta get back in the workshop
00:27:30and let's move our renewing our vows to next year
00:27:34that's a fantastic idea
00:27:35les no i didn't what
00:27:36huh that's what you said right
00:27:39huh
00:27:40did i
00:27:41yeah
00:27:42gary and meg
00:27:43oh gary and meg would much prefer to go to cabo
00:27:45let's send them something sign my name
00:27:46no no no
00:27:47that will be so humiliating
00:27:48don't worry don't worry i'll tell lulu that she can just go skiing with her friends like she wanted
00:27:51so i'll see you when i see you i'll be back when i'm back and um i love you and
00:27:55i can't wait for new year new us next year
00:27:58mwah
00:28:04here
00:28:05oh
00:28:08is he fucking kidding me
00:28:11oh
00:28:13What?
00:28:28Lindy?
00:28:29Hi, Richie.
00:28:32I made a mistake and I'm leaving less.
00:28:36Tonight.
00:28:37I hear the emotion in your voice and it's beautiful.
00:28:40I've been hoping for a Christmas miracle.
00:28:42Yeah, I'm gonna go to Vermont.
00:28:43I'm gonna go to the Grey House.
00:28:45And I...
00:28:46Could you...
00:28:47Could you come with me?
00:28:48Where you finished your masterpiece.
00:28:50I'd be honored to be invited.
00:28:52A gift beyond measure.
00:28:53I have ten vacation days and one personal day bag.
00:28:56And...
00:28:57Heart emoji.
00:28:59Let's meet at Mandy's Diner at midnight.
00:29:02Heart emoji bag.
00:29:03I'll arrive with joy in my step and a light in my heart.
00:29:07Did you love my present?
00:29:08The fuck?
00:29:09Pardon?
00:29:10I...
00:29:12Didn't have the heart to open it.
00:29:15So, um, I'll just bring it with me, okay?
00:29:18New year.
00:29:19New you.
00:29:20New us.
00:29:20Oh, is Vermont cold?
00:29:22I get...
00:29:43Everybody out in 30 minutes or Hulk is gonna see me smash.
00:29:49Iceberg ahead 30 clicks.
00:29:50Abandon ship.
00:29:52Lady tomato about to burst.
00:29:53Hey, hey, hey.
00:29:55Les, promise me a minute.
00:29:59I'll give you 20.
00:30:18Excuse me?
00:30:19I thought the boots up my ass might start after the holidays.
00:30:23Martin signed the LOI ASAP, and Hilton turned on the money hose in good faith.
00:30:27Martin signed. I'm a partner.
00:30:29Apparently not the important one.
00:30:33Well, now I'm inspired, and I would like you to leave.
00:30:37A genius needs his space.
00:30:39Exactly. And I plan on being inspired throughout the holidays.
00:30:44I know this is a difficult transition period. I'll give you tonight.
00:30:48But I will be back tomorrow.
00:30:52Boots on the ground, Dr. Littlejohn.
00:30:57Fuck me.
00:31:06Go back.
00:31:13Take care.
00:31:17Great.
00:31:22Sorry.
00:31:23Let's go.
00:31:24Let's go.
00:31:35Mills, I don't have time.
00:31:39She what?
00:32:02You're old, text me.
00:32:09Fuck you too.
00:32:14Starla?
00:32:25Freezers off limits from now on until I say, I need to regroup.
00:32:29Where are you going?
00:32:31I'm leaving you.
00:32:33If anyone should be leaving anyone, I should be leaving you.
00:32:35How's that?
00:32:36For trying to sabotage my career?
00:32:38Think I don't know?
00:32:39You don't think Nils would call me for comment?
00:32:40Lindy?
00:32:41Scientific American, not TMZ.
00:32:43I'm a hoax, you know what?
00:32:45I'm threatened by a female scientist taking credit for my work.
00:32:48You mentioned Joan.
00:32:50I'm not a misogynist.
00:32:52I'm not intentionally.
00:32:53If anything, I'm an accidental misogynist.
00:32:55And I too blame the patriarchy for that.
00:32:57I never said misogynist.
00:32:59Why would you do this?
00:33:00Why?
00:33:00You don't know.
00:33:01Why?
00:33:02Is it about Gary and Meg?
00:33:04This is about you.
00:33:06And our marriage.
00:33:08And breaking the promise of Step 3, a grand gesture.
00:33:11And our daughter who hates me.
00:33:14Sucking the life out of me and my promising writing career.
00:33:17Career?
00:33:18Stop!
00:33:19It was one book in the early aughts.
00:33:22This is what you did.
00:33:22You basically, you turned in a book report on your fucked up family.
00:33:26You changed the names.
00:33:27You added a little bit of wry sarcasm.
00:33:29And then you called it fiction.
00:33:30And you got lucky.
00:33:32Lucky.
00:33:32Rainbow starts with black.
00:33:34No shit.
00:33:35My book report and the subsequent Oscar-nominated film it's based on bought and paid for this
00:33:42extravagantly sad McMansion in this podunk red state town you forced us to move to so
00:33:49that you could try to be something other than Mr. Fucking Tomato Head.
00:33:53This is the last thing I need right now.
00:33:55Oh my god.
00:33:56I'm so sorry.
00:33:57What is it you need right now?
00:33:59I need you.
00:34:00Yeah.
00:34:00I need your support.
00:34:02This is my last chance.
00:34:04You already got your prize.
00:34:07And, in case you forgot, I was by your side for every fucking sentence.
00:34:12Every book signing.
00:34:13Every interview.
00:34:14I held your purse.
00:34:16I held my tongue.
00:34:17You know?
00:34:17I was there for the ride.
00:34:18And it wasn't always pleasant.
00:34:20You know, the rollercoaster of insecurity and emotion was frankly fucking exhausting.
00:34:24I have paid that debt.
00:34:26I have been by your side for 15 years.
00:34:29You had flavor saver.
00:34:32And it was insufferable.
00:34:36Still is.
00:34:37But I didn't get my moment in the spotlight like you did.
00:34:40I didn't get my prize.
00:34:42Swing and a miss.
00:34:43How is it my fault?
00:34:46How?
00:34:47My apologies.
00:34:48Forgive me for being ambitious.
00:34:50Coasting by on a one hit wonder isn't enough for me.
00:34:54Maybe you don't have another hit in you.
00:34:56Huh?
00:34:56Maybe you're one and done.
00:34:58Maybe your ego just won't let you read the room.
00:35:00I would rather be blinded by my ego than paralyzed by fear.
00:35:04That's me?
00:35:04That's what you think of me?
00:35:05Yeah, because you haven't produced one goddamn sentence in 15 years!
00:35:09What kind of magic do you think you're suddenly going to find in your beloved greyhouse?
00:35:12With me by your side, like an emotional support animal, encouraging you, keeping you calm.
00:35:18Because, quote, I promise we'd return there one day, unquote.
00:35:21I mean, I am through being held emotionally hostage for your creative paralysis.
00:35:27And there it is, everyone!
00:35:31That's our show!
00:35:32Same line every time.
00:35:40This is the top secret thing you've been working on?
00:35:44Give me that.
00:35:45Give me that.
00:35:45A Tonka truck is not going to change the world, let alone agriculture as we know it.
00:35:51You have no idea what you're talking about.
00:35:52It's what you said to every female scientist that's never had a better idea.
00:35:55You know, most men overcompensate with a big truck.
00:35:59It's nice to see yours to scale.
00:36:07What a gentleman!
00:36:09Oh, fuck.
00:36:10What?
00:36:11Oh, no, Lindy.
00:36:13What the?
00:36:15What's she doing?
00:36:15What's she doing?
00:36:19What's she doing?
00:36:27What's she doing?
00:36:32Oh, God.
00:36:33Is she dead?
00:36:39Lindy.
00:36:40Say something.
00:36:42Are you alive?
00:36:44Oh, you're alive.
00:36:46Oh, you're alive!
00:36:48Fuck you!
00:36:50Fuck you!
00:36:51Oh!
00:36:53Oh!
00:36:56Oh!
00:36:57Oh!
00:36:58Oh!
00:36:59Oh!
00:37:06Merry Christmas!
00:37:08I don't want to fight tonight
00:37:27Last
00:37:30Oh, fuck
00:37:32What time is that?
00:37:59How much did I drink last night?
00:38:02Less
00:38:07Why would you put the plaid back up?
00:38:11God, it's my eyes
00:38:14And my head
00:38:18Oh, I'll try January starts today
00:38:26Oh, wow, that really cleaned up
00:38:32Less
00:38:38Who's at the door?
00:38:50What is this nonsense?
00:39:01No, no, no, no, no, no
00:39:03Lindy?
00:39:04Everything is fine
00:39:06Don't freak out
00:39:20Okay, I'm opening up the draw house
00:39:23Stop screaming at me
00:39:28Whoa!
00:39:29Whoa!
00:39:30Whoa!
00:39:35Whoa!
00:39:37Whoa!
00:39:37Whoa!
00:39:38Whoa!
00:39:39Whoa!
00:39:40Whoa!
00:39:42Whoa!
00:39:47There you are!
00:39:49You're okay!
00:39:53I am not okay!
00:39:57Can you hear me? I am not okay!
00:40:05I am not okay!
00:40:08It works! I can hear you!
00:40:10You're too loud!
00:40:12I'm sorry!
00:40:13Well now I can't hear you!
00:40:15How about now?
00:40:16No! Too loud!
00:40:18Now?
00:40:19Softer!
00:40:20Now?
00:40:21Better!
00:40:22I hate this fucking thing!
00:40:27Can you hear me now?
00:40:29Say again?
00:40:30Can you hear me now?
00:40:31Yes!
00:40:32Sorry! Sorry! I'm so sorry!
00:40:35Are you okay?
00:40:36I'm fine!
00:40:38I heard that! I think we got it!
00:40:41Hi!
00:40:42What the fuck, Les?!
00:40:44I heard that too!
00:40:46Loud and clear!
00:40:47Okay?
00:40:48Mindy, I'm so sorry!
00:40:49It was an accident!
00:40:49And...
00:40:50And uh...
00:40:51I can't believe it even happened!
00:40:53I...
00:40:53But you're incredible!
00:40:55I mean...
00:40:56You're beautiful!
00:41:01Are you smiling right now?!
00:41:04No!
00:41:05No, no, no!
00:41:05No, of course not!
00:41:06I...
00:41:06I just...
00:41:08I...
00:41:09Just like...
00:41:10Wow!
00:41:12Wow!
00:41:12Wow!
00:41:14Wow!
00:41:15No, I apologize!
00:41:16You're my wife!
00:41:16You're not an experimenter!
00:41:18I should hope so!
00:41:20I should hope so!
00:41:20Jesus!
00:41:21Oh my god!
00:41:22This is your job?!
00:41:24This how you're gonna solve world hunger?!
00:41:26You're gonna make everybody tiny so...
00:41:29So they don't what?
00:41:30Eat more?
00:41:30I don't...
00:41:31Do you...
00:41:31Do you want me to answer that?
00:41:34Or...
00:41:34Explain it to me!
00:41:36Well...
00:41:37Um...
00:41:38It's called...
00:41:39Cellular reduction...
00:41:40And um...
00:41:41It's the process of miniaturization and restoration...
00:41:43Of...
00:41:44Organic fruit...
00:41:45Uh...
00:41:45And vegetables...
00:41:46And that's how...
00:41:47I plan...
00:41:48To solve world hunger!
00:41:50Explain how you're gonna make me big again!
00:41:52Jesus!
00:41:53I don't give a shit how it works!
00:41:55Oh right, well...
00:41:55I just reversed the process.
00:41:57That's the restoration part.
00:41:59Great!
00:42:01Restore me!
00:42:03No, please!
00:42:04I can do that!
00:42:06Um...
00:42:06Uh...
00:42:06But first...
00:42:07Uh...
00:42:07A surprise!
00:42:09Meet me in the dining room!
00:42:14Merry Christmas, Lindy!
00:42:16Les!
00:42:16Do I look...
00:42:17Merry...
00:42:18Or hungry?!
00:42:20Well, it's kinda hard to tell from this distance...
00:42:22Um...
00:42:22I'm not!
00:42:23Make me big again...
00:42:25Now!
00:42:25Heard that...
00:42:26Loud and clear...
00:42:27Um...
00:42:28The thing is...
00:42:29Tell me!
00:42:30You can make me big again, Les!
00:42:32I can...
00:42:32And I will...
00:42:33Um...
00:42:34The thing is...
00:42:35That it's just...
00:42:35I think...
00:42:36It's just gonna take a day...
00:42:37Uh...
00:42:38Or two...
00:42:39Tops...
00:42:39But...
00:42:40You'll be fine...
00:42:41Everything's gonna be okay...
00:42:42You're healthy...
00:42:42I checked your vitals...
00:42:44Wait!
00:42:44I could die?!
00:42:46Tiny?!
00:42:46No...
00:42:47You're not gonna die...
00:42:49Tiny...
00:42:50You'll be safe in the dollhouse...
00:42:52Because it's...
00:42:53It's almost exactly the same as our house-house...
00:42:56Um...
00:42:57The stove works...
00:42:58The refrigerator works...
00:43:00There's food...
00:43:01The water runs...
00:43:02And...
00:43:02I shrunk a few of your favorite things to really make you feel at home-home...
00:43:06Your clothes...
00:43:08From your closet...
00:43:11Um...
00:43:11And...
00:43:12Uh...
00:43:13This...
00:43:13Curling thing...
00:43:16And...
00:43:17Your hairbrush...
00:43:18Uh...
00:43:19Cold cream...
00:43:21Looked important...
00:43:22Oh!
00:43:23And I remembered your coffee...
00:43:24And the coffee maker...
00:43:25Worked perfectly, right?
00:43:27Oh!
00:43:27One crucial thing...
00:43:28Um...
00:43:28The toilet...
00:43:29Uh...
00:43:30Well, it works...
00:43:30I figured it out...
00:43:31Just don't ever look in the hall closet...
00:43:33Downstairs...
00:43:34Ever...
00:43:35You will be restored to regular size...
00:43:37Uh...
00:43:37I promise it...
00:43:38This is just temporary, Lindy...
00:43:39I am so close...
00:43:42Truly...
00:43:42Now it's so close?!
00:43:45Not a day...
00:43:46Or two...
00:43:48Tops?!
00:43:49Less?!
00:43:49You motherfuckers!
00:43:53Hey...
00:43:54Calm...
00:43:54Calm down...
00:43:57Calm fucking down!
00:44:18Nations,
00:44:19Hey Lindy...
00:44:21I just don't...
00:44:22I'm gon...
00:44:22I NEED A MINUTE!
00:44:25DROP
00:44:25I DON'T WANT TO FEEL ATη!
00:44:30He's been away.
00:44:43You can refilm the ladies' cup, too.
00:44:47She's on her way, Barb.
00:44:49She's gone back to her husband.
00:44:50No.
00:44:51They always do.
00:44:52Not this time.
00:44:53No, no, no.
00:44:53Because we've got plans.
00:44:55Yep.
00:44:56We've got concrete plans.
00:45:01How about a ten-day getaway to Vermont for two?
00:45:07Uber-romantic.
00:45:15There are multiple reasons you could be late.
00:45:18No, I know Lindy's coming.
00:45:19Why, you may ask?
00:45:21Because our love story is woven into the fabric of time.
00:45:26Destined to be written.
00:45:28There are more lives for generations to come.
00:45:31Oh.
00:45:33Quiet, everybody, please.
00:45:34Quiet, please!
00:45:36Sorry.
00:45:37Oh.
00:45:38It's work.
00:45:39It's work.
00:45:41Hey, Martin.
00:45:44Well, I was going to head out of town, so...
00:45:48No, no, no, no, no.
00:45:49Of course.
00:45:50Of course.
00:45:50Of course.
00:45:50I'll just...
00:45:51I'll head into the...
00:45:51Into the lab.
00:45:55No, I've not heard from us.
00:45:58Wait.
00:45:59What do you mean you can't get a hold of them?
00:46:01Yeah, I'll...
00:46:02Okay.
00:46:03Bye.
00:46:03Does this mean your romantic getaway is canceled?
00:46:07Pfft.
00:46:07Barb, can I be honest?
00:46:08I love your service, but I don't love the negative energy.
00:46:13Oh.
00:46:15He's suffering?
00:46:21Take those off.
00:46:22I feel like a specimen.
00:46:24And come closer.
00:46:25I don't want to keep yelling.
00:46:30Jesus, the 96?
00:46:32If there was ever a time.
00:46:34I know why you didn't tell me about your work.
00:46:37Well, I couldn't.
00:46:38It was top secret.
00:46:39I signed an ironclad NDA.
00:46:41That's bullshit.
00:46:43You didn't trust me.
00:46:45Which makes me so...
00:46:47Sad.
00:46:49Makes me so sad.
00:46:52Fuck you.
00:46:54But...
00:46:54Yeah.
00:46:59Well, I didn't exactly hide it from you either.
00:47:02What?
00:47:04Happy birthday, Lindy.
00:47:07They are so cute!
00:47:11Wait.
00:47:12And legible?
00:47:14Happy birthday, Lindy.
00:47:17They're so cute.
00:47:19Oh, and functional.
00:47:21Happy birthday, Lindy.
00:47:24How cute.
00:47:26And accurate.
00:47:28The dent from when I sideswiped the mailbox.
00:47:33Never put it together.
00:47:35You also said you didn't want to know.
00:47:39Well, you're not leaving me.
00:47:41Well, I have to go so I can fix you.
00:47:43No, no, no.
00:47:44No!
00:47:44Less!
00:47:45Take me with you.
00:47:46I'm portable.
00:47:47You'll be safer here in the dollhouse.
00:47:48I feel very not safe.
00:47:50I feel very small and like something bad could happen.
00:47:54I won't let something happen.
00:47:55Something did.
00:47:56Something else.
00:47:57Beyond the accident.
00:47:59But I have to go to the lab so I can fix you.
00:48:01Please, Les.
00:48:02I do not want to be alone.
00:48:03Please, I'm scared.
00:48:04Well, what if I can show you that, um, being small isn't scary?
00:48:09Oh, God.
00:48:10I've always wondered what the world would look like if I were six inches tall.
00:48:13Not me.
00:48:15I can show you.
00:48:16No, I, I don't.
00:48:18Aren't you just a little bit curious?
00:48:20I will be restored to regular size soon.
00:48:24I promise.
00:48:25Trust me.
00:48:29Okay.
00:48:31This is crazy.
00:48:33Oh, my.
00:48:37Oh, fuck.
00:48:59Oh, fuck...
00:49:10I mean, everything's really big.
00:49:14Really big.
00:49:28Wow.
00:49:29I can only imagine how different everything looks, right?
00:49:34You see this dust ball?
00:49:37Do you think I could choke on this?
00:49:39Oh, yeah, put that down.
00:49:44Hello, Dolores.
00:49:45Look who it is.
00:49:47See?
00:49:48She's not that scary.
00:49:49Why is she looking at me like that?
00:49:51Oh, oh, it's puffing up.
00:49:53Do you see what it's doing?
00:49:55No, no, no.
00:49:56It's trying to eat me.
00:49:57No, this is not interesting to me.
00:49:59Can you put me down, please?
00:50:01Put me down.
00:50:14It's fun, right?
00:50:16We all love a train ride.
00:50:18Merry Christmas, Lindy.
00:50:21Merry Christmas, Lindy.
00:50:49Maybe too many times around?
00:50:51I want to get off!
00:50:53I don't like it!
00:50:55Oh, I'm gonna be sick!
00:50:59Oh, God!
00:51:02Oh!
00:51:03Oh, my God!
00:51:05Hey, it's gonna be okay.
00:51:09I'm so sorry this happened.
00:51:12I'm so incredibly sorry.
00:51:24Water truck ran out of shrinking gas, so I'm gonna go to the lab to refuel.
00:51:28What am I supposed to do with this?
00:51:29I thought I could crush it up and you could maybe snort it, but I don't know.
00:51:34Um, Scarface?
00:51:35I'll just gnaw on it or something.
00:51:40How are you feeling?
00:51:43Really?
00:51:44I mean...
00:51:45I know what you mean.
00:51:47Better.
00:51:50I did always love this couch.
00:52:05When you're ready.
00:52:07Uh, pour away.
00:52:13Don't be shy.
00:52:16So, this is my, uh, tiny little life now?
00:52:22Temporary, tiny little life.
00:52:23How long again?
00:52:24A day.
00:52:26Two at the most.
00:52:26I'm so close.
00:52:27So close.
00:52:28Yeah.
00:52:29Yeah.
00:52:34Did you microwave this off the floor?
00:52:36Floor is clean.
00:52:37You're the first person to ever walk on it.
00:52:40Six inch tall Neil fucking Armstrong?
00:52:42Kind of.
00:52:51Unless you put parmesan in the potatoes.
00:52:54Potatoes a la Diane.
00:52:57With a twist.
00:52:59Who?
00:53:00Reese Witherspoon from Legally Blonde.
00:53:02She's gonna play me in the movie.
00:53:04She's gonna play the sister character.
00:53:05I still don't know who that is.
00:53:07Walt?
00:53:08She's blonde, wears pink, goes to Harvard.
00:53:11That's a stretch.
00:53:12What?
00:53:13I am blonde.
00:53:14Les said that we could be twins.
00:53:16I'm sure he's just being kind.
00:53:18No, no, I think with the bright hair and makeup, you know Hollywood, I mean...
00:53:21It's beyond me why they're even adapting a book into a film.
00:53:24Because it sold a million copies, because it won the Pulitzer.
00:53:28Hollywood must be out of ideas.
00:53:31You're not excited?
00:53:32Uh, Laura Dern is playing the mother.
00:53:34I adore Laura Dern, but I question her judgment.
00:53:38The book wasn't well received.
00:53:39I repeated one Pulitzer.
00:53:41The Guardian dubbed it literary popcorn and added,
00:53:44that does not a Pulitzer make their words.
00:53:46Which she memorized and repeat constantly.
00:53:49I can barely show my face at Wine Club Wednesday without Carol turning her nose up at me as if
00:53:55I were the devil incarnate.
00:53:57Walt?
00:53:57Your mother needs your Wine Club Wednesdays.
00:54:00That's not a stretch.
00:54:01Mom.
00:54:02It's fiction.
00:54:03Carol didn't see a character.
00:54:05Carol saw me, and the me in your book is a monster.
00:54:09It's a comedy.
00:54:10It's a dark comedy.
00:54:11It's a coming of age story about a woman who felt abandoned and silenced by a monster of a mother
00:54:19character.
00:54:20You try being a single mother of two young girls whose husband walked out one day without a word.
00:54:28Walked out or was driven away?
00:54:29Jim abandoned me.
00:54:30No, he stopped being married to you.
00:54:34He abandoned me.
00:54:36Me too.
00:54:37And he's still the hero.
00:54:39I tried my best.
00:54:42Walt?
00:54:42If I may.
00:54:43Walt?
00:54:44Diane, have you tried the potatoes?
00:54:46I call them potatoes a la Diane.
00:54:49With a twist.
00:54:50Is the twist a turn of the knife?
00:54:52It's Parmesan cheese.
00:54:53Try it.
00:55:00It's too rich, but absolutely divine.
00:55:03Just like you.
00:55:09Walt.
00:55:11I think we should visit the arch tomorrow.
00:55:13I hear it's dreadful.
00:55:16Yes.
00:55:17Yes.
00:55:17No, I don't get the arch.
00:55:19It's like an arch for what?
00:55:21It's the gateway to the west.
00:55:24I think it's great.
00:55:25I can barely show my face on wine club Wednesdays.
00:55:30Hollywood has run out of ideas.
00:55:32I think Laura Dern is very generous casting.
00:55:34And say hello.
00:55:40What's going on?
00:55:41Do you want to have sex?
00:55:42Oh, yes.
00:55:43Yes, please.
00:55:43Will you hear?
00:55:45We'll be quiet.
00:55:46We'll be fine.
00:55:47Alright, you're set to high volume.
00:55:50Watch.
00:55:51Watch.
00:55:51Watch.
00:55:52Watch.
00:55:54Okay.
00:55:54All right, all right.
00:55:55Okay, good.
00:55:56Come on.
00:55:59Aw.
00:56:08Aw.
00:56:09Thank you for defending me.
00:56:11Aw.
00:56:13Aw.
00:56:16Aw.
00:56:17Aw.
00:56:20Aw.
00:56:21Aw.
00:56:21Aw.
00:56:24Oh, fuck!
00:56:25Oh, fuck!
00:56:25Oh, fuck!
00:56:26Jesus, waltz!
00:56:27Can we help you?
00:56:29Obviously, this isn't the washroom.
00:56:31It's down the hall with the light on.
00:56:33The one with the toilet!
00:56:34I can see the light.
00:56:41He's trying to escape.
00:56:45We're to the arch.
00:56:48Oh, my God.
00:56:50Oh, fuck.
00:56:51Okay, okay.
00:56:53Maybe I can't be quiet.
00:56:55I don't think you can.
00:56:58Hey.
00:57:03I'm not really like her though, right?
00:57:05My mother, I'm not like Diane, am I?
00:57:09Does that make me waltz?
00:57:12Seriously?
00:57:12Seriously?
00:57:14Seriously?
00:57:14Seriously?
00:57:16No.
00:57:17Fuck no.
00:57:18Because she's-
00:57:20Unbelievable.
00:57:20And not in a good way.
00:57:24It's gonna be okay.
00:57:26It's only a few days.
00:57:31Only a few days.
00:57:37It's only a few days.
00:58:01It's only a few days.
00:58:10What?
00:58:11What?
00:58:12What?
00:58:14It can't be right.
00:58:18Okay, I'm coming in.
00:58:19But now.
00:58:21Now-ish.
00:58:46Magoo!
00:58:49Stay.
00:58:51Stay!
00:58:55Go, go, go, go, go!
00:59:00Magoo!
00:59:02Come here!
00:59:05Ow!
00:59:06Fuck!
00:59:07You fuzzy fucker!
00:59:20Stop!
00:59:22Stop it!
00:59:23You're fine!
00:59:24I feel bad enough already.
00:59:29I mean, she's safe, right?
00:59:44Hey!
00:59:47Yes, Richard?
00:59:48What is it?
00:59:49Oh.
00:59:50You seem upset.
00:59:51No, Richard, I'm fine.
00:59:52I'm fine.
00:59:53You know, I sometimes come in my car to cry too when I need a release, so I get where
00:59:58you're at.
01:00:00Okay, right?
01:00:00Is that all?
01:00:02Now you've got me worried.
01:00:03Is everything all right at home?
01:00:04You know, with your wife, Lindy?
01:00:06Lindy's her name, right?
01:00:07Yes, Richard.
01:00:07She's fine.
01:00:08Good, good.
01:00:09Yeah.
01:00:10She's just, uh, keeping busy over the holidays.
01:00:13Yes, Richard.
01:00:14She's at home writing.
01:00:15She's keeping busy.
01:00:16She's writing, writing.
01:00:18That's wonderful.
01:00:19That's wonderful.
01:00:19Richard!
01:00:21Get your butt inside!
01:00:22I'm sorry you used profanity.
01:00:24I'm upset.
01:00:27I'll see you later.
01:00:39Les?
01:00:41Les?
01:00:42Oh!
01:00:47That is a toy.
01:00:51Oh.
01:00:54He left me?
01:00:56Right.
01:00:57Oh.
01:00:58Oh.
01:01:00Why?
01:01:01I have to trust him.
01:01:02I cannot spiral.
01:01:06Huh?
01:01:07Oh.
01:01:08Yeah.
01:01:09Why not?
01:01:11Okay, that's it.
01:01:13That's good.
01:01:14Space colon.
01:01:15Colon?
01:01:17Colonel.
01:01:19Colonel.
01:01:20Space colonel.
01:01:22Next stop, Uranus.
01:01:24I couldn't.
01:01:25Fuck, I'm already spiraling.
01:01:27You!
01:01:28What?
01:01:28What?
01:01:29You made me believe you were so close.
01:01:30So I believed you.
01:01:32Yes, and you should believe me.
01:01:33That's our deal.
01:01:33There is mathematical truth in stating I am so close.
01:01:36So what does so close mean to you in this context today?
01:01:42I can't put an actual number on it.
01:01:44I don't know.
01:01:46What?
01:01:47Oh.
01:01:48What have you done?
01:01:49What have I done?
01:01:50Martin, I didn't want to say you have one job.
01:01:53Contract is for 30 days.
01:01:56That's insane!
01:01:57Well, you said that you were close.
01:01:59What?
01:01:5930 days?!
01:02:02Well, it will work.
01:02:03I mean, the math says it will and math is never wrong, so...
01:02:07Now you have 30 days.
01:02:08No, no, no.
01:02:09We have 30 days.
01:02:10Oh, now it's we.
01:02:11What does it say exactly?
01:02:12What does the small print say exactly?
01:02:13It says that we have 30 days to prove that the restoration formula works.
01:02:19Uh-huh.
01:02:20Or the patent on our tech...
01:02:22On my tech, thank you.
01:02:23...reverts to Hilton, and Hilton sues you.
01:02:26Sues us.
01:02:28For fraud.
01:02:29And you go to jail.
01:02:31To jail?
01:02:32Well, can he do that?
01:02:33He can.
01:02:34And after 30 days, it goes.
01:02:36The tech, the lab, the bobs.
01:02:38Gone.
01:02:41But...
01:02:41But...
01:02:42Okay, so how do I make...
01:02:44Uh...
01:02:45How do I...
01:02:48How do I make things big again?
01:02:49Because I have to make things big again.
01:02:51Well, after 30 days, you can't.
01:02:56This is what he actually said.
01:02:59I mean, can he actually do this?
01:03:01Yes.
01:03:01He can.
01:03:02It says it right here.
01:03:04Oh.
01:03:06Less.
01:03:08How bad is this?
01:03:12Okay.
01:03:17I'm not even going to ask about the cat.
01:03:23Meow!
01:03:36Um...
01:03:36I...
01:03:37I...
01:03:37I...
01:03:37I got you something for Christmas.
01:03:40Oh...
01:03:40I...
01:03:41I...
01:03:41I didn't get you anything.
01:03:43Oh, that's...
01:03:44It's okay.
01:03:45I didn't want you.
01:03:48Like what Shakespeare used to write with.
01:03:50You know I like Shakespeare?
01:03:52Oh, everybody knows you like Shakespeare.
01:03:54Bars guard.
01:03:56Well, you talk about it a lot.
01:03:59Um...
01:04:00You seem a little bit down.
01:04:02No.
01:04:03I'm, um...
01:04:03Just tired.
01:04:04Yeah.
01:04:05I was waiting up last night for someone...
01:04:09Someone special.
01:04:10You know?
01:04:11And it's just...
01:04:14Well, Merry.
01:04:15Merry Christmas, Richard.
01:04:16Oh, thank you, Janet.
01:04:17This is a very thoughtful gift, so...
01:04:25Thy returneth...
01:04:26To thine grind.
01:04:36Okay.
01:04:38Buddy?
01:04:39Thank you for moving her.
01:04:48Oh.
01:04:51Right.
01:04:52Okay.
01:04:55Oh, that's good.
01:04:57Okay.
01:05:02Oh, come on.
01:05:07Okay.
01:05:09Oh, my God.
01:05:14Oh, there.
01:05:16Oh, there.
01:05:17Oh, there.
01:05:18Oh, there.
01:05:18Guide.
01:05:22Oh.
01:05:23A classic.
01:05:25GUM!
01:05:30Volume.
01:05:33We're never turning this off.
01:05:35Okay, Sachs.
01:05:38So...
01:05:40I've got popcorn, but no candy.
01:05:48Oh, less. That's just for me.
01:05:59Richard, I need everyone at the top of their game today. It's a big day.
01:06:02It could be the day. It needs to be the day. Or two. At the most.
01:06:11Here are my thoughts.
01:06:15Adjust the last line on the Maxwell stress tensor to B sub J.
01:06:19Minus one half times the quantity epsilon naught.
01:06:23Times E squared plus B squared over mu naught.
01:06:27Thoughts complete.
01:06:28Bob, implement his thoughts.
01:06:36B sub J minus one half times the quantity of epsilon naught.
01:06:41Times E squared plus B squared over mu naught.
01:06:45Complete.
01:06:46Carl, implement his thoughts.
01:07:12Of course.
01:07:14Up to the door.
01:07:18Chase and Q.
01:07:18Andy, learn the animation skills.
01:07:29Let's make history.
01:08:18Let's make history.
01:08:19Let's make history.
01:08:21Bob the Explainer?
01:08:23Nominal success.
01:08:24Subject expanded to regular size for 2.1 seconds.
01:08:28Same as previous attempt.
01:08:31Molecular disequilibrium.
01:08:32Eraser Bob.
01:08:34See medic.
01:08:34Bring in Fred.
01:08:36Clean up an aisle everywhere.
01:08:38Richard?
01:08:39We're waiting on analysis to proceed.
01:08:41We'll adjust based on your thoughts.
01:08:43We'll go again.
01:08:45No, you won't.
01:08:46If this is your definition of close, we have a big problem.
01:08:50You working in a bubble with your staff and your secrets ends today.
01:08:54Moving forward, everything that happens in this lab will be authorized by me.
01:08:59No.
01:09:00No, no, no.
01:09:02Um, this is not how we work here.
01:09:05We are making history.
01:09:06Okay?
01:09:07That corn was regular size.
01:09:10It's incredible.
01:09:11As a scientist, how can you not see that?
01:09:13Reports, equipment, results, any spending whatsoever, everything you use must be logged up to and including packets of instant oatmeal
01:09:20in the break room.
01:09:21Can I explain my fiber deficiency?
01:09:24Okay, everybody, everybody.
01:09:25This is Virginia.
01:09:26Vivian.
01:09:27Vivian.
01:09:27I don't know her last name, but she's new here and she doesn't know how things work.
01:09:31And Bob, you don't need to worry about your oatmeal.
01:09:33Okay?
01:09:33Can we just talk about this?
01:09:36Martin, you know exactly how much money this science circus is hemorrhaging.
01:09:40I don't care about the money.
01:09:41Of course you don't.
01:09:42You spent seven years and several hundred thousand dollars designing your logo.
01:09:48I had to open the books.
01:09:50Well, it had to be perfect.
01:09:51What?
01:09:51Irresponsible.
01:09:52And deeply sad.
01:09:54Dr. Littlejohn, it's no longer your money.
01:09:56It's Hilton Smith's money.
01:09:57This is his lab now, and I run Hilton's lab.
01:10:00Ergo, I run this lab.
01:10:02This is unacceptable!
01:10:04And it's ridiculous!
01:10:05And do, do something!
01:10:08Okay, no we, no we, just me.
01:10:10I want to talk to Hilton right now!
01:10:13Well, good luck reaching him.
01:10:15He's spending the holidays piloting an experimental submersible off the coast of Guam.
01:10:20Guam?
01:10:21Guam?
01:10:22What?
01:10:23Shut it down.
01:10:24We'll try again tomorrow.
01:10:26Together.
01:10:27These ladders are an OSHA violation.
01:10:30You're an OSHA violation!
01:10:33Dear hairy Jesus!
01:10:35And I hope Hilton gets crushed into ketchup by 400 atmospheres of pressure!
01:10:4029 days.
01:10:41Not helpful.
01:10:42Not!
01:10:43The point!
01:10:51What have I done?
01:10:59Midnight for the stars and dew.
01:11:06Midnight and a rendezvous.
01:11:11Your eyes held a message tender, saying I surrender all my life for you.
01:11:22It's my phone.
01:11:25My phone!
01:11:26Oh!
01:11:30Oh!
01:11:31Coming!
01:11:32What?
01:11:44No!
01:11:45No!
01:11:47No!
01:11:49No!
01:11:53No!
01:11:55No!
01:11:55No!
01:11:57No!
01:12:01No!
01:12:04No!
01:12:04Did you just say something?
01:12:12Am I losing my mind?
01:12:20I can see me in you.
01:12:22I can see me in you.
01:12:26Do you know?
01:12:27What?
01:12:28Ah!
01:12:29What is that?
01:12:30Oh!
01:12:32Oh!
01:12:33Oh fuck!
01:12:38I gotta get out of here!
01:12:45Oh!
01:12:46Oh!
01:12:46Fuck!
01:12:47Ah!
01:12:48Ah!
01:12:51Ah!
01:12:52Ah!
01:12:53Ah!
01:12:53Ah!
01:12:53Ah!
01:12:54Fuck!
01:12:55God dammit!
01:12:56Let!
01:12:58For fuck's sake!
01:13:01Ah!
01:13:01Ah!
01:13:03Ah!
01:13:04Dang it!
01:13:05Oh crap!
01:13:08Oh crap!
01:13:09What was it?
01:13:10Fuck off mic duel.
01:13:12Huh?
01:13:22Ahhhhh!
01:13:24Ahhhhhhh!
01:13:28Argh!
01:13:30Ah!
01:13:31Arghh!
01:13:31And!
01:13:38Oh
01:14:13Oh
01:14:17What the
01:14:18Oh god, oh god
01:14:34Oh
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