00:00i used to have this anxiety that would just take control of me in the morning like like
00:06just waking up i'll start to have this fear and anxiety that will just close up my chest
00:12and i'll just sit on top of my bed and not move for a long time
00:23grace and peace to you my name is susan and i'm connecting from Botswana my testimony is about
00:34mental healing and spiritual healing this was back in 2024 when i was going through depression
00:44stress you know anxiety um a lot of fear i was unable to sleep well i was not well but
00:56mostly
00:57mentally i was not well mentally which you know um also affected my health physically this was
01:05actually a result of things that happened in my life and 2015 i lost my only guardian
01:17my mother and after her loss i also
01:25realized that i was not going to graduate
01:28the reason i could not graduate it was because my final examination results could not be found
01:38you know so i had written my final examinations but my results were never found or yeah it became
01:46well it was very stressful because of that i started to have a lot of anxiety fear of the future
01:57i barely slept and i became depressed of time i was tired i felt so tired mentally i was exhausted
02:09you
02:10know i felt i was always constantly thinking a lot about the future now what what do i do
02:20and whatever i tried seems not to work so i i was very stressed i was very anxious i was
02:28very depressed
02:29and i think the danger of it was at the time i didn't really realize it until i went to
02:37the village so from the city i went to the village for some time and i think you know just
02:43being
02:45in a different environment that's when i started to realize that i'm going through a lot i think that's
02:51when it really sunk in that i'm not going to be able to graduate this was very stressful for me
02:58because
02:58honestly speaking i don't have a plan b so for me it was like okay study graduate find a job
03:06start life
03:08from there you know but now i don't have you know this figured out i don't know what to do
03:14i don't have
03:15the only person who would help she's not there anymore you know so it caused a lot of distress
03:22stress and you know i'm at the village the lifestyle there is like alcohol drinking there isn't much
03:31to it that could you know uplift or anything like that so that's what i end up indulging you know
03:38the
03:38time um but by the grace of god i then moved from the village i think this now was around
03:472022
03:4822 i i came back to the city and i think mainly it was because i was trying to escape
03:56the whole
03:57lifestyle of drinking alcohol because honestly speaking i was using that for destruction it's not
04:04like uh it was a lifestyle that i constantly lived in so i i realized this was not going to
04:12be good for
04:12me i mean i'm going through a lot already and doing this is it's gonna take more from my life
04:19so i i moved
04:21to the city and then um the time was very stressed to distract myself i used to watch movies especially
04:31at night especially like up to early hours in the morning i watch a lot of movies in cities like
04:39that
04:39and you know people will be going to work in the morning and i have not even slept yet so
04:45it cost a
04:45lot of uh strain i guess and i was always tired i isolated a lot i started to isolate a
04:52lot i had no
04:53joy at this point i lost appetite for life i just i didn't like you know make plans or okay
05:02i want this
05:03about my life i had lost hope i had lost hope to tell the truth so this is where now
05:10i was able to
05:13discover god's heart tv i don't know if it was three facebook or youtube i can't remember exactly
05:19but and then i learned that you know you can send a prayer request because i i saw a lot
05:26of testimonies
05:27i was like okay i still had hope that i i wanted to go to school i wanted to you
05:33know like something
05:35could come up come out of the whole situation then maybe i can still graduate you know i was invited
05:42to
05:44to the interactive prayer now this is in 2024 which is what you already do and i joined
05:50now i remember when i joined the prayer when brother chris was praying i don't remember feeling anything
05:59you know i don't remember shaking vomit nothing i was watching some people you know manifesting or
06:09vomiting i was like okay maybe it's working for them maybe it'll work for me next time
06:14i i joined at least twice and then from there again i started thinking well it's not working for me
06:24so i stopped sending prayer requests and then one day this was around 3 a.m i noticed something about
06:33my
06:33mind it was quiet i was like wait i remember i said i sent i wrote that um that testimony
06:423 a.m because
06:43i knew this was this was because of the prayers you know it couldn't have been anything else
06:50and i started to notice that i think this has you know been gradually happening now mine was more quiet
06:58i wasn't really focused much on okay what does the future look like and since then
07:08the healing started to take place my mind started to open up i started to to have appetite i used
07:18to
07:18have this anxiety that would just take control of me in the morning like the first like just waking up
07:26i'll start to have this fear and anxiety that will just close up my chest then i'll just
07:31sit on top of my bed and not move for a long time so and gradually realize i have not
07:39experienced this
07:40in a while and i realized this is because of the prayers also so now i'm starting to
07:49interact with people in the house a bit more so now because i'm interacting with people i'm not
07:55you know spending so much time on screen because you know spending time on on you know watching
08:01movies and all that was just for me to distract myself from thinking about my life it was like
08:07i was trying to run away from thinking anything about my life i mean i remember if anyone if i
08:13was to
08:13meet anyone in there start asking me what are you doing it was just one of those questions i did
08:19not
08:19want to to encounter i don't want anyone asking how are you doing what is happening in your life are
08:26you
08:26studying are you working i avoided that a lot because it cost so much anxiety and i started to listen
08:33to
08:34you know the teachings of god i started to to follow more ministries and listen to the word of god
08:42so
08:43now what happened is the content of what i was what of what i was watching and listening to started
08:48to
08:49change because i had realized that okay my problem was the you know also the content that i was consuming
08:55it wasn't godly the movies and services that i watched they were not related to god anyhow so i realized
09:03that okay that had an effect so i was able to stay away from them started to read the word
09:09of god
09:10connect more with god and pray and uh since 2024 healing has taken place so much i started to you
09:21know to
09:22desire things in life and i remember i am 2025 i think june i registered for um for a data
09:33science course because of the past experience you know going to school and in in in doing your best
09:41but at the same time not graduating i felt like a failure honestly i put it on myself and i
09:48felt like
09:48a failure because i had nothing to show for it so i had so much doubt on my ability to
09:54study and to pass
09:56so you know but by the grace of god i enrolled for a data science course and god showed me
10:06you know
10:07through that that i'm able and um he took away that fear of failure because i had so much fear
10:17of it
10:18especially when it comes to academics now so as i i am testifying i completed the course
10:27i think last week i was able to complete the course by the grace of god so because these are
10:34the
10:34changes that happened since the prayers before thinking of the future would give you anxiety
10:40and and now do you allow yourself to think about your future and how do you feel about it now
10:46i can make plans
10:49i can make plans but it is god's will that is going to happen there's so much peace that i
10:57have that
10:58you know it's like i'm resting on god knowing that okay i thought you know i can i can have
11:06what i asked
11:06for from god and also i cannot have it but what i know is what he will do it is
11:14what is best for me
11:15so i do make plans and i pray about them and god answers the way he answers so i just
11:23have this
11:23peace that i'm not killing the weight of my life so to say you know if i may put it
11:29that way i make plans and
11:31i live it to god i'm not anxious about okay is it going to happen in this very details the
11:37way i
11:38want it no no i realize that is not my portion i make plans i pray about them and then
11:45i leave them to
11:46god how is your spiritual life how is your relationship with god then now it has changed
11:52a lot because i have learned that peace does not come from having everything that you're asking for
12:01it comes from knowing god it comes from knowing the mind of god about your life or about that particular
12:10thing you know if you know that god is saying okay that will happen but not now
12:15or he's saying okay that is not the the thing that i want for you i want this for you
12:20you have peace
12:22you start to have peace you start to trust him and realize that he's reliable i believe it is in
12:28hebrews
12:304 12 that talks about the word of god being a double-edged sword so i realize that it is
12:40the word of god
12:42that heals us that is able to change any situation because you know one thing about mental health is
12:56it's a very difficult topic because it's not something that it can really show or it's not like when you
13:03are
13:03physically sick right you know what to do but mental illness rather it's quite a tough one and i think
13:11a lot of people you know maybe like me i didn't even know what to do in such a situation
13:18and then you
13:18might go to hospital or take medications but sometimes it doesn't really help but as sure i can
13:24guarantee a sure solution to mental health and spiritual health is the word of god because it is
13:33able to pierce through and change everything that us human being are not able to something that medication
13:45cannot do the word of god will do i was an asthmatic patient so about 24 years now i was
13:57struggling with
13:58this after they prayed on 2020 since third third january i could not experience it up to the dates
14:07i've been saved for you from asthma attack
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