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00:00Sous-titrage Société Radio-Canada
00:35Sous-titrage Société Radio-Canada
01:00Sous-titrage Société Radio-Canada
01:03Speaking of your mom, are you excited that tonight Steve Nichols is going to finally give her the tribute she
01:09deserves after the disastrous funeral?
01:12Oh, I wouldn't call it...
01:13We have a clip.
01:14My mom was... she... was special at...
01:20Terrible job, son. You're humiliating me in front of the devil. No, we'll never marry.
01:29Yeesh.
01:30I've come a long way since then, Marsha. I mean, Margo.
01:33Anyway, that's old news. We're up for firm of the year and best commercial, baby. It's our night.
01:39Sheila, the human highlight reel flambé and...
01:42I want to say Clinton Jellybee?
01:45Yep, Sheila's right. Also, I promise, she knows my name.
01:48Hey, watch this.
01:49Eh, eh, eh, eh, eh.
01:51Oh, wow.
01:53Sheila! Sheila! Sheila!
01:55Sheila-nomics!
01:57Shiro dreams of Sheila!
01:59Yo quiero Sheila Bell!
02:01For those just joining us, the human highlight reel is pulling tons of focus by reappropriating out-of-date catchphrases
02:07and doing a dance that can only be called the Sheila.
02:10Beef! It's what's for Sheila!
02:12Yes, yes. Everyone loves gum and flambé's better half. But let's not forget, tonight's about my late partner, Marsha Gum.
02:19And by extension, me.
02:20It's been a break-in at the Sheila Gate Hotel!
02:23Just wait to my ultra-respectful five-star three-ring multimedia tribute to the late Marsha.
02:28It's...
02:29Here's Sheila!
02:31Sheila!
02:33Sheila!
02:33Sheila, are you okay? Did you break my pussy?
02:35Of course not! What a stupid question!
02:38It's gonna...
02:39It's my relax sound because of how normal my pussy is!
02:43Gonna be somber as hell, y'all.
02:46Well, there you have it, folks. Another magical Vegas G-G's.
02:50Hi!
02:51Hi!
02:52Hi!
02:52Hi!
02:52Hi!
02:53Hi!
02:54Hi!
03:06Hi!
03:10Hi!
03:14Hi!
03:14Hi!
03:15Hi!
03:17Hi!
03:25Hi!
03:26Sous-titrage Société Radio-Canada
03:58You're right. Now admit you broke your pussy.
04:00No! Nothing bad has ever happened to me.
04:03Hurt pussy, eh? Now that's what I call a...
04:07I got nothing.
04:09Glem, you look great.
04:10Someone slept inside last night.
04:13Okay, I'm gonna work the room. Maybe land us a big new client.
04:16Glem, you know everyone. What do I need to know?
04:19Oh, well, that's Steve Nichols. I believe he's a lawyer of some kind.
04:24Yeah, I know him, Glem. Who else?
04:26All right, let's see. That's Billy Grimple.
04:28He owns La Bouche, the Mouth Thin Casino.
04:30That's Showbiz Entertainment Cheese.
04:33He runs a hedge fund.
04:34And, oh, that's Anita Chingles.
04:37She was your mom's biggest client.
04:39And who's that guy?
04:40I think his name is Steve Nichols.
04:42No, that guy.
04:44I need to leave. I broke my pussy.
04:47What? Glem?
04:48If that were true, he wouldn't be able to walk like that.
04:51I assume.
04:52Well, maybe Irene and her new boyfriend will be normal.
04:55Irene has a boyfriend?
04:56What is he, like a biker or a gangster?
04:59Rebel with or without a cause?
05:00Hey, Sheila.
05:01This is Gordo Cipurini.
05:04Hey.
05:05And, of course, the famous Patrick.
05:08I am humbled to meet you, Monsieur Gum, Madame Flambe.
05:13Oh, my God.
05:14Hi, Gordo. Hi, Patrick.
05:16Who wants to see me twirl?
05:18The show is starting.
05:20Everyone be quiet.
05:25I was warned the law late one night
05:28when my eyes beheld a lawyer's side.
05:31For the gavel from the charge began to rise.
05:35And suddenly we testified.
05:38We did the mash.
05:39We lied to lawyer's mash.
05:41We did the mash.
05:42Such.
05:43It wasn't all y'all.
05:44It's a beautiful beauty.
05:45We love, love, love,
05:49your George.
05:54Hello, I'm Mayor George Wallace.
05:56Welcome, everyone, to the 50th Annual Golden Gavels.
05:59Brought to you by tingles
06:01and reruns of the lawyer's show, Bull.
06:03If you haven't yet, feel free to ride
06:05the mechanical bull from Bull.
06:07Yee-haw!
06:09This is, of course, my adopted brother,
06:12our beloved lunch meat.
06:13I'm full of beans.
06:16Wow, this is catchphrase right off the bat.
06:19What a crowd we have tonight,
06:21but everyone might as well go home
06:23because right in his usual seat,
06:26I see five-time winner,
06:28attorney Merle Streep from his firm, Streep Law.
06:31Let someone else win for a change, Merle.
06:35Truly, all the greats are here tonight.
06:38Also, Sheila Flambe.
06:41Seeing that Sheila isn't one of the greats.
06:45Sheila didn't even know she was nominated.
06:47She just heard they're giving out a prize
06:49for the most hung jury.
06:53Because of my unharmed privates.
06:55T-M-I.
06:56Is that Lincoln gum I see with Sheila?
07:03Seriously, Lincoln,
07:05your mother's death
07:06was the hugest deal in the world.
07:08Let's have a moment of silence
07:10for the most important person in the room right now,
07:12Marsha Gumm's spirit.
07:21But I'm still full of beans!
07:26We've got a really, really great show for you tonight.
07:29The 50th annual GGs will be right back.
07:32Show will resume in five minutes.
07:36It's our night,
07:38and I'm coming for you, Steve.
07:41Jesus Christ, after all this time...
07:49Why, hello there!
07:52My name is, uh, Robert E...
07:55Don't say Lee.
07:56Don't tell him your name is Robert E. Lee.
07:58Robert E. Zombie.
08:01Industrialist.
08:02What are we gabbing about here at this fine table here?
08:06Well, we were talking about gum and flambe.
08:08Ooh, Lincoln gum, he is a fine litigant.
08:12He's got me out of many a fine pickled pepper.
08:16I employ slave labor, you see.
08:18White slave reminds you nothing untoward.
08:21And Lincoln gum has kept me out of the fire,
08:25profiting off my white slaves for years and years.
08:30You're doing a great job hiding and drumming up business for Lincoln.
08:34I love you, Glem.
08:36I love you, too.
08:39Oh, I mean, uh, I love you, too.
08:41The band.
08:42Yeah, that'll cover it.
08:44Anyway, about my white child's slaves.
08:48Good evening.
08:49Any of you fine people seen a man by the name of Glem Blorchman?
08:53He's about 5'10".
08:54Looks like one of them creatures the Bible warns of.
08:57No, sir.
08:58And I'd be able to.
08:59I'm very tall.
09:04You're welcome, Glem.
09:06Glem?
09:06How dare you?
09:08I challenge you to a duel.
09:11No!
09:12Stop!
09:13I can't.
09:14And Marsha just looked up at me and said,
09:17Thank you.
09:19You know, Steven,
09:20I was trying to buy a gumball the other day,
09:23and it occurred to me that a nickel can't buy a piece of gum
09:27because gum is worth more than nickels.
09:32Well, Lincoln is on the penny,
09:34which, last I check, is worthless next to a nickel.
09:36And nickels is plural.
09:41Uh, yes.
09:42Well, Jefferson is on the nickel,
09:45and he invented the lazy Susan.
09:47And in court, you're lazy at suing.
09:51Where is everybody going?
09:53You think this is an award show?
09:56This is an arena where we battle it out
09:58to see who's remembered as Marsha's successor.
10:00And I'm about to memorialize her so hard
10:03that people are gonna think you were just Marsha's butler.
10:06I only did that for 12 Halloweens.
10:09My God, the show is starting any second.
10:11Everyone get back to your seats!
10:12Damn it, this is so bad!
10:14And now, the nominees for Best Commercial.
10:17Sheila Flambe and Irene Gumm for L'Albert Rising.
10:21Stay for one drink.
10:23We should talk.
10:28You were my mom's best client? Friend?
10:32To Marsha, they were the same thing.
10:34Mike Milk for the milk is fresh.
10:37I've heard what people are saying.
10:39Mike Milk is just tall.
10:42And Mike Milk uses being tall to cover for not going to law school.
10:46Well, to the haters, I say, check this out.
10:50I'm sunglasses now.
10:53Sunglasses! Sunglasses! Sunglasses!
10:56Your mommy would be so proud.
10:58She used to always brag about how she was turning you into a little clone of her.
11:02Yeah, I'm kind of trying to do my own thing.
11:05Step out of her shadow, stop accidentally sexualizing her, etc.
11:09Oh, sweetie, why would you ever do that?
11:11Kyle and Skyle Munt. We almost do it all.
11:16I'm Kyle Munt.
11:17And I'm Skyle Munt.
11:18And do you know what makes us Vegas' number one twin lawyer team?
11:22What, sweet brother?
11:23We do it all.
11:25Slip and fall accidents.
11:27Medical malpractice.
11:28Laser injuries.
11:29Nursing home abuse.
11:31The only thing we don't do is have sex with each other.
11:34We've never even thought about it.
11:35We're focused on you.
11:37Kyle and Skyle took my eviction case without once having sex or even fooling around.
11:42We lost, but there was no funny business.
11:44Even if we wanted to, our bunk bed would make it too difficult.
11:50I've heard about Steve's five-star, three-ring, multimedia tribute to Marsha.
11:55Did you know he has a hologram?
11:57Steve has a hologram of my mom?
11:59So let me tell you what I'm gonna do.
12:00My company is sponsoring this show, Chingle Supermarkets.
12:04That's what grocery stores are called here.
12:06Yes.
12:06I'm gonna pull some strings.
12:08You'll deliver a beautiful, heartfelt speech, make up for that fiasco of a eulogy,
12:13and maybe Chingle's leaves Steve Nichols and Associates for an ambitious young firm?
12:17Sure.
12:18A heartfelt, non-disastrous memorial to my mom.
12:22Easy.
12:23And the winner for Best Advertisement is...
12:27Irene Gumm and Sheila Flambe for Lawbird Rising!
12:35Oh man, I dedicate this award to my boyfriend, Gordo featuring Patrick.
12:40Well, I'm no good at speeches, not like Sheila.
12:44Sheila!
12:44Sheila!
12:46Sheila!
12:47Sheila!
12:48Sheila!
12:49Sheila!
12:50Sheila!
12:51Sheila!
12:57Awesome new noise from Sheila!
13:00Sheila is amazing!
13:01Do the Sheila!
13:02Yeah!
13:03Do the Sheila!
13:05She's overcome with emotion!
13:07I could watch this forever!
13:09The 50th Annual Gigi's will be right back!
13:16So...
13:16Crazy weather lately!
13:18We won!
13:19Did you see my speech?
13:21What?
13:22I sure did!
13:23You were wonderful, sweetheart!
13:26And what about you, dude?
13:27Did you see your firm win an award?
13:29Or were you too busy writing your manifesto?
13:30I didn't...huh?
13:31Sorry.
13:33Speech.
13:33For Mom.
13:34Lot riding on it.
13:35Jingle's gotta go bathroom.
13:37Fresh in your dreads, sawyers!
13:41I have a waiter named, uh, General Stonewall Flowers.
13:46Stonewall Flowers!
13:47Forget I said General, huh?
13:49Glem, what's going on?
13:51Why are you doing pistachio disguise-y style capers during an award show?
13:55Uh, well...
13:57Once upon a time, a happy young farmer lived with his wife, Sarah.
14:02And one day, the farmer noticed some onions were missing.
14:06He chalked it up to varmints.
14:08Varmints?
14:09I hate those!
14:10But the next day, some potatoes went missing.
14:14Now, the farmer decided to keep watch, but he fell asleep.
14:18When he woke, he found Sarah asleep in the hay with a handsome bandit.
14:25A pot of stew between them, made with his vegetables.
14:30His vegetables?
14:32Hmm.
14:32The farmer wanted blood, but Sarah convinced them to settle it in court.
14:37On the stand, Sarah revealed the bandit was her first husband,
14:41who she thought had died in a rock slide.
14:44The men were at each other's throats.
14:46So the judge issued an old-fashioned sentence.
14:49A duel on the field of honor.
14:53That was legal?
14:54When was this?
14:551996.
14:57Now, it would start as soon as one party slapped the other one with a glove.
15:02But the bandit fled, never to be seen again.
15:07And with time, my anger subsided.
15:11Oh, it's you in the story!
15:13Yes!
15:14He must have seen me in the nominee announcement.
15:17He came here to kill me!
15:18Why not just go home so he can't slap you?
15:21Are you very stupid?
15:22I wanted to see you guys win!
15:24Aw, that's so stupid!
15:26Sheila, Sheila!
15:27You are the breakout star of the night,
15:30and we want to incorporate you into the big physically demanding song and dance number.
15:33Do you want to do it, or is there some reason you can't?
15:42What's a good mom story I could tell?
15:46Summer camp?
15:47I don't think so.
15:48You'll be spending the summer with Mother at the Ariana Huffington Empowerment Retreat for the Unapologetically Annoying.
15:56Good news, Lincoln. He put up a fight, but I got the dean of your college to let me be
16:02your R.A.
16:03Lincoln, guess what? The doctor gave me pills that'll make sure you never get pubes.
16:08What? Mom only implied that she didn't want me to have pubes.
16:14What's up, Assface?
16:16Guess who dropped six figures at Chingle's hologram supply to make your mom say anything I want?
16:22This Godzilla dicked hump master.
16:25You think a little speech is gonna do anything? Tonight is mine.
16:29Steve, this is weird, even for you. You have a wife and kids and stuff.
16:34And I think I'm realizing that you can't really make that thing say anything worse than what I'm already dealing
16:40with.
16:40Oh, yeah? What about this?
16:42Lincoln, I just want you to know. I'm proud of you, no matter what.
16:48Wait. That's it. I'll just lie. Thanks, Steve.
16:53Oh, uh, what a nerd. Right, Pinkers and Bench?
16:57Uh, yeah. Whatever, man.
16:59Good luck with the hologram or whatever.
17:01You embarrassed me!
17:03Hey, everyone. Guess who didn't wash their hands?
17:09Welcome back to the Gigi Awards.
17:11Now, for a special treat, we've got a musical tribute to, you're not gonna believe this, lawyers!
17:27And the award for best surprise witness.
17:30For the best supporting bartender.
17:32And the award for best objection goes to...
17:45And then Mom said, Lincoln, of course I'll give you a hug.
17:49I'm not embarrassed to do that in front of the mailman.
17:53No, that's too outlandish.
17:55So, where do you think Sheila's been this whole time?
17:57There she is.
18:04And now it is finally time for the In Memoriam Reel.
18:08Followed, of course, by Steve Nichols' five-star, three-ring salute to Marsha Gum.
18:13And I'm told we're also gonna get a speech from Marsha's butler.
18:17Curtin' Jellybean?
18:30All right, it's funny, it's sweet, it's sad, it's complete horseshit. This'll work.
18:36Jesus, this is horrific.
18:38Yeah, a lot of people seem to die around us.
18:43Are you okay?
18:45You look a bit off.
18:45I'm great.
18:46I have a speech that's a real tribute to my mom.
18:49Good!
18:49Then you can work for me and stop associating with these disgusting clients and inane colleagues like your mom always
18:55wanted.
18:55My colleagues aren't inane.
19:00Plus, I thought you said Mom would be proud of what I'm doing.
19:03What you're doing. Winning.
19:05She'd be ashamed of who you're doing it with.
19:08Uh, thank you.
19:11Mother's still ashamed of me.
19:12The devil still won't marry her.
19:15Lincoln!
19:16It is your friend Sheila!
19:18Your pussy is broken!
19:20What?!
19:21Please do not yell about pussy during the in memoriam.
19:26Lincoln, everyone in this life has a broken pussy.
19:29Some people's broken pussy is their fear of failure.
19:32For some, it's addiction.
19:34Some people's broken pussy is even a literal broken pussy.
19:37Not me, though.
19:38Your broken pussy is your mom.
19:39We had a great year.
19:41We won an award.
19:43Irene is dating the puppet boy.
19:45And you haven't been able to enjoy any of it because you're too busy trying to hide your broken shattered
19:50swollen pussy.
19:51Which again, only you are doing and not me.
19:55Wow!
19:56A lot of people died this year.
19:58And now, to say a few words about his mom, Lincoln Gum.
20:07My pussy hurts.
20:09Wait, I mean...
20:11Everything I am today, I owe to my mom, Marsha Gum.
20:15Aww.
20:17And I'm a wreck.
20:19Aww.
20:21My whole life, I've been trying to make the case that she was a good mom.
20:27She wasn't.
20:28But she was the best lawyer this town's ever seen.
20:32She even made Steve Nichols' evil ass successful.
20:35But she didn't take care of me.
20:37You know who does?
20:39My weird niece, Irene, who's as strong as an ox and smart as two pigs.
20:44My associate, Glem Blorchman.
20:46Over there, dressed like a British policeman.
20:49He's been hiding all night wearing costumes.
20:52I assume because he didn't want to embarrass me in front of you, my mom's peers.
20:56But he doesn't embarrass me.
20:58He rules.
20:59And most of all, my intern, Kevin, who I forgot to invite to this.
21:03But also, Sheila, Dr. Duncan Stein Flambe.
21:08In conclusion, I'm done putting my mom on a pedestal.
21:14But all of you should.
21:15She'd sacrifice anything for the legal profession.
21:18I'm the proof.
21:19So shove your GGs up your ass.
21:22We're leaving.
21:27I hate my mom and my kids.
21:30I sent my son to a boarding school because I couldn't remember his name and I didn't want to ask.
21:35We have not had sex with each other.
21:38And I have to confess, I'm in love with you, Irene Gumm.
21:43This cat Gordo doesn't appreciate you.
21:46Leave him and be with me.
21:49Oh, Patrick, I will.
21:58Oh, yeah, here's Steve Nichols and his stupid hologram or whatever.
22:03Sometimes the law can get you down.
22:06Can make you weep.
22:07Can make you frown.
22:09But where to turn in dark of night
22:11To help you with your legal plight.
22:16Nickels and gum are two things in your pocket.
22:23Come on, guys.
22:25Let's get some frosty chocolate milkshakes.
22:28All right.
22:28Now that that's over, the award for Firm of the Year goes to...
22:33Gumm and Flambe!
22:36Go ahead.
22:37I don't need it anymore.
22:42Congratulations, Sheila!
22:43And now enjoy your ceremonial victory lap on the mechanical bull!
22:50What?
22:52What bull?
22:53What bull?
22:55What bull?
22:57You know, Ligon, you taught me something.
22:59You can run your whole life, but...
23:02Well, well, well.
23:05If it ain't Glenn Blorchman.
23:07Or should I say Glenn Blakeman.
23:09Wow, you did a bad job changing your name in two different ways.
23:14Glenn Blakeman was the fake one.
23:16Enough!
23:17I know you're carrying, Glenn.
23:19Less do is...
23:21Cold clams.
23:23Glenn, you don't have to!
23:25I do, Irene.
23:27Like your uncle said,
23:28Some wrongs gotta be righted.
23:42You win, Glenn.
23:45Tell my son to...
23:47Use offer code DAD50 for a bonus bet on...
23:56DoghouseSportsbook.com!
23:58You stupid son of a bitch!
24:00I wasn't scared of dueling because of you!
24:04I just didn't want to have to wake back off the killer in me!
24:13Patrick!
24:14No!
24:19We did it, y'all!
24:22Honestly, whatever at this point.
24:25It was reaching through the clouds to risk a dream...
24:31He's dead.
24:32Good night, sweet Patrick.
24:35Alright, Gordo, we're through.
24:36Holy shit!
24:38Glenn, you killed the bandit!
24:41I was the bandit.
24:43The old man's back again!
24:46Up next, the television event you've been waiting for.
24:49After ten epic years of crushing lawsuits, rocking designer suits, and peeping ladies in birthday suits...
24:55The lawyer princes of Carson City, Pringison Bench, are riding off into the sunset.
25:00But not before one last wild romp.
25:03Don't go anywhere, losers.
25:04It's the series finale of Pringison Bench.
25:08Cheardrops burned her cheeks
25:10For she thought she'd heard
25:13The shadow had left this land
25:19The old man's back again!
25:24The old man's back again!
25:30The crowds just gathered!
25:34Their faces turned away...
25:37CHIRP!
25:39Sous-titrage Société Radio-Canada
26:37...
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