- 8 hours ago
Category
📺
TVTranscript
00:17Welcome. Welcome to Have I Got News For You. I'm your host, Roy Wood, Jr. In the news this week,
00:25Ice Agents debuts softer image that still hides their identities.
00:35RFK Jr. unveils new treatment for leukemia.
00:43America's meth dealers plan their annual convention.
00:47All right, well, if Kid Rock's there, it's going to be a hit.
00:49On Amherstine tonight, he's a senator from California who served in the House of Representatives
00:53for 12 terms, and he's one of Trump's favorite targets.
00:57We'll ask him which nickname he prefers, Shifty Schiff or Drifty Schiff.
01:00For my personal favorite, Tokyo Drifty Schiff, it's Senator Adam Schiff.
01:09And joining Michael, he's a former Daily Show correspondent who's going on to host his own
01:14Emmy Award winning show, as well as the wonderful, wonderful show,
01:17Hassan Minhaj Doesn't Know. And during our time together at The Daily Show,
01:20I showed him a $500 watch that I was proud of, to which he replied,
01:25cute, it's Hassan Minhaj!
01:30Now for the biggest stories of the week, everybody.
01:34Amber, Senator, I'm going to show you some highlights from the week that was.
01:38You tell me what's the story.
01:41Okay, the Department of Justice, old man Yap-A-Lot, oh no, Epstein, no, and redacted.
01:49This story is about Epstein and all the things he may or may not have done.
01:54I'm going to say he may have done them.
01:57Yeah.
01:58Let's get the first thing out the way off the top.
02:01Who, sitting right here.
02:03No.
02:03Right now, is in the Epstein Files.
02:08Senator.
02:10Senator, Senator, right here, what are you talking about?
02:12Only in newspaper articles, please.
02:15Yes.
02:15Who else?
02:18Michael, you were!
02:19Look at Michael!
02:20He was on the line!
02:21Michael, look at me!
02:23Michael, make eye contact with me, Michael!
02:26So, this is true.
02:28This is true.
02:29Hassan, you and I are in the Epstein Files.
02:32But, but, no, it's for doing political, calm down, we're going to get to the why.
02:37Don't ever get to why, and let me just enjoy it.
02:41No.
02:42No, I have to get to why.
02:44You're all nasty.
02:46No.
02:47Hassan and I are in the Files for doing political comedy shows.
02:51Senator Schiff is in there for a bunch of news headlines,
02:54and Michael Ian Black is in there for his show on something called Crackle.
02:58Okay.
03:01So, uh, Amber, it looks like you are the odd one out
03:04when it comes to who's in the Epstein Files.
03:07Now, we've had about a week to take in all of this.
03:09Wait a second.
03:10This is insane.
03:13Bro, we're boys.
03:15And you text me, hey, come on the show.
03:20And you're going to ambush, like, you're going to ambush me in Act One with a comedian friend of mine.
03:26I mean, who's in the Epstein Files?
03:28I'm like, hey, how do you think I feel?
03:32Senator, you know what you signed up for.
03:36We and him.
03:38It's not you.
03:39We in it.
03:41It's we.
03:42Right.
03:43We're in this together.
03:44They're clearly playing a version of Hide the Slime Ball with all these redactions.
03:49The fact that they dig up you and Crackle, that they can find, but all the other stuff ends up
03:57redacted.
03:58Right.
03:59Nobody has ever even heard of this streaming platform, Crackle.
04:06But somehow, I'm in the goddamn Epstein Files.
04:12Senator Schiff, can you remind us exactly, like, of, you know, how did that happen?
04:16And what giant trove came out of last week's release?
04:20Well, you'll remember during the campaign, Trump and the people around him were promising they were going to release the
04:26files.
04:27They were going to finally have transparency.
04:29Trump gets into office.
04:30It's the last thing that he wants.
04:32Now, let's get into the details of these files a little bit more with a game I like to call
04:37Remember 2008?
04:40If you don't remember 2008, it was a seminal year.
04:43It was Barack Obama's first term in office.
04:45Iron Man dropped, starting the whole Marvel Empire.
04:47And a gentleman named Flo Rida reminded us to get low, low, low, low.
04:53Does anyone know what else happened in 2008?
04:56Is that the year Epstein first went to prison for soliciting sex from a child?
05:02Points for you!
05:03Oh, right.
05:03That's good.
05:04That's impressive.
05:072008 was the year Jeffrey Epstein pleaded guilty to solicitation of prostitution with a minor
05:12and was sentenced to 18 months in prison.
05:16So, if people hang out with Jeffrey Epstein before 2008, maybe he's just a weird, rich guy.
05:22But if people hang out with him after 2008, they're hanging out with a dude who admitted to soliciting sex
05:29with kids.
05:30So, let's start off easy.
05:32Who is that?
05:33Howard Lutnick.
05:34Yeah, that's Trump's Commerce Secretary.
05:36And, um, he kind of looked like your mama's first boyfriend after a divorce.
05:40We've talked previously on the show about Lutnick and the whole relationship with Epstein.
05:45They live next door to him.
05:46And so, in 2005, he had a little chit-chat with Epstein.
05:502005.
05:52Is that before or after 2008?
05:54Before.
05:55Yes, it is before.
05:56Yes, it is before.
05:57So, maybe Lutnick didn't know what Epstein was up to.
06:00And here's what Lutnick most famously said about his 2005 visit with Epstein.
06:06My wife and I decided that I will never be in the room with that disgusting person ever again.
06:14So, I was never in the room with him socially, for business, or even philanthropy.
06:22If that guy was there, I wasn't going because he's gross.
06:27Good for him.
06:28That's right.
06:29You know what?
06:30I'm revising my opinion about Howard Lutnick.
06:32Here, I thought, this guy was just a greasy, grifting, corrupt, money-laundering commerce
06:40secretary.
06:40But now I know that he's a man of high moral fiber.
06:45Roy?
06:46Here's CBS News with the answer.
06:48Commerce Secretary Howard Lutnick arranged a visit to Epstein's island with his wife and
06:52children in 2012, after which Epstein passed along this message to Lutnick.
06:56Nice seeing you.
06:58Okay, but 2012 is before 2008, like we said, right?
07:03Like, why would you, hey man, nice to see you.
07:06Like, you would never email your drug dealer after buying a drug.
07:09Hey, thank you for the drugs again.
07:13We learned about this guy in the Epstein files.
07:16Pitbull.
07:17Is there any guesses on who that is?
07:20Uh, did someone say Pitbull?
07:23That is the new CBS medical correspondent, Peter Attila, hired by the
07:27terrific Bari Weiss.
07:29Yes, that is celebrity doctor and part-time Vin Diesel impersonator, Peter Attila.
07:34And, uh, he recently got a new job, and he really wanted to keep that job.
07:39The Epstein files also show hundreds of references to the name of author Peter Attila,
07:43who was recently hired as a CBS News contributor, including a crude sexual message by Attila.
07:49Attila posted a statement apologizing and saying he was not involved in any criminal activity.
07:54Paramount's Skydance, owner of CBS News, did not immediately respond to my request for comment.
07:59Isn't he at CBS?
08:01Ask yourself!
08:03We've all been at work, and you get the, can we chat?
08:08Do you think maybe there's just so many people in the Epstein files that they're like,
08:12man, 90% of the people on this panel are in the Epstein files?
08:19Do you think they're just like, it'll come for all of us eventually?
08:23The Epstein files are like death.
08:26It turns out Attila's name is mentioned in the Epstein files more than 1,700 times,
08:33according to Attila's own book.
08:35I haven't read Peter Attila's book, I'll be honest.
08:38Okay.
08:39I've got several copies of it, but I, I haven't read it yet.
08:43Attila tried to make a date with Epstein while his baby was in the ICU.
08:49Oh, jeez.
08:50In his book, Outlive, Attila says his wife called him on Tuesday, July 11th.
08:55She was on her way to the hospital where their baby then stayed for four days.
08:59Instead of going to be with them, it appears that Attila got up the next morning
09:04and made a date with Jeffrey Epstein.
09:06Now, according to Attila, he did not come home to San Diego until 10 days later.
09:13No!
09:13Here's celebrity doctor and husband of the year himself.
09:17So here with my wife right now, and she put the question to me,
09:20do you think any other woman could be married to you?
09:26I responded, absolutely.
09:29I'm a catch.
09:30I think lots of women could be married to me.
09:3310 days!
09:3410 days.
09:36That means he has, like, no regard for children, of course.
09:40I got there.
09:41I got there myself.
09:43How is Peter Attila being held accountable for his actions, Haasem?
09:47I'm assuming none.
09:48There's no accountability.
09:49That's just my hot take.
09:50Yeah, well, if we're talking about accountability for Peter Attila,
09:53the answer is that there will be no accountability.
09:55According to the L.A. Times, Peter Attila will be keeping his job at CBS.
10:06Hear that?
10:06It's the ghost of all the people in the Epstein file.
10:11CBS has a new editorial policy, which is to say, no policy anything goes, apparently.
10:18Anything that doesn't displease the president is their policy.
10:23Let it roll.
10:24Let's talk about a guy who is experiencing some degree of consequences for his relationship with Epstein.
10:29And that's the former chairman of the Paul Weiss law firm, Brad Karp.
10:33Brad corresponded with Epstein in 2016.
10:36And he had a special request.
10:38In one email exchange, Karp appears to ask Epstein for help,
10:42getting his son a job on a Woody Allen movie.
10:45Epstein-Woody Allen crossover.
10:49That's like Freddy versus Jason.
10:51Like, remember that? Alien, predator, like.
10:55Except it's, it's just predator versus predator.
10:59Now, why might the Paul Weiss law firm sound familiar?
11:03This is when, when Trump first came into office, right,
11:05there were a bunch of law offices that rather than get sued by Trump said,
11:09we'll just do pro bono work for you into the tune of hundreds of millions of dollars.
11:13And they were the first one to do that.
11:15Yes.
11:16Oh, no.
11:16Wait, so they were like the ACLU for corruption?
11:18Is that what you're saying?
11:20That's exactly what it was.
11:22It was part of a legal deal to give tens of millions of dollars in free legal work
11:25to cause this backed by Donald Trump.
11:28Now, for double point, who was the person who brokered that deal?
11:32Same dude, Brad.
11:34Yes.
11:35I was sure it was going to be Woody Allen.
11:39Now, let's move on to our old pal Elon Musk.
11:42Aww.
11:44Don't boo.
11:45Sometimes it's good to see a familiar, creepy looking person.
11:49When the new trove of files came out, Musk tweeted, quote,
11:53Well, Epstein hounded me relentlessly to go to his pedo island, and I always declined.
11:58Question.
12:01Is that what the emails really say?
12:05Please no, and please show it now.
12:08This appears to be an email from Elon Musk to Epstein in 2012, asking what day night will
12:14be the wildest party on your island?
12:16Musk, who repeatedly has called for the release of an Epstein client list, denies any wrongdoing.
12:21Writing over the weekend, if I actually wanted to spend my time partying with young women,
12:26it would be trivial for me to do so without the help of a creepy loser like Epstein.
12:31I could throw my own creepy part in.
12:35That's what I heard.
12:36I feel like that's what I heard, right?
12:37That is exactly what you heard.
12:39Okay.
12:39All right.
12:39So we've heard from Elon.
12:40We've heard from Peter.
12:41We've heard from Brad.
12:42We've heard from everybody.
12:44Who's one person we have yet to hear from?
12:46Is it the president of the United States?
12:49Oh.
12:50What?
12:54It is President Trump.
12:55We haven't talked about Donald Trump yet because Trump has been busy generating headlines like,
13:01no credible evidence President pooped himself during executive silence.
13:06For the record, if they have to release a story saying you for sure did not poop your pants.
13:11You know, people do ask me whether when I'm around him it seems like he's wearing diapers.
13:18And my answer is always the same.
13:20Depends.
13:29That's why you watch this show.
13:33What was Trump's reaction earlier in the week to the document dump?
13:37He shit his pants.
13:40According to the president, yeah, the files are out there, but it's time to move on.
13:45I think it's really time for the country to get onto something else.
13:48You know, now that nothing came out about me, other than there was a conspiracy against me, literally, by Epstein
13:56and other people.
13:57But now let's get to why it took them so damn long to release the files.
14:02What is the reason the administration is given?
14:05It certainly seems like what happened, and this is just speculation, but the president or his advisors said, just push
14:13it all out at once.
14:15And he was probably told, and they were probably told, because how could they be so blind, well, that will
14:20release hundreds of names of victims thousands and thousands of times.
14:25And if you're wondering how all of that redactant went, here's a lawyer for one of the Epstein survivors.
14:33What is very clear is that the DOJ has disregarded the well-being of the survivors.
14:38One of my clients was named 538 times in the latest release of Epstein files.
14:44Now, when we talk about ineptitude within this administration, I respectfully want to push back a little bit on you
14:50there, Senator, because, you know, Deputy Attorney General Todd Blanche commented a little bit about all of this.
14:56And if you don't know who Todd Blanche is, Todd Blanche is a man who appears to have been born
15:01literally yesterday.
15:02Is the public going to learn the identities of the men who abused the girls with the information that you're
15:09releasing?
15:10You just baked in an assumption into your question that I have never said and I don't know to be
15:14true.
15:14Is the public going to learn about men that abused these girls?
15:19Like, what does that mean?
15:20I mean, I don't understand what that means.
15:22He got confused about the word man.
15:26What did you mean by that question that had all the information and it ends with the question mark?
15:30What's that about?
15:32I met with him the day or the week before his confirmation hearing.
15:36And I said...
15:36What a name drop this guy is.
15:37Can you believe it?
15:41I just have one question, and that is, what are you going to do the first time you're asked to
15:45do something unlawful, immoral?
15:48What are you going to do?
15:49Because that decision is going to define the rest of your legacy.
15:52And he gave me an answer, which I would subsequently hear from every other nominee, which was, I don't think
15:58I'll ever be put in that position.
16:00And then you get to this scene where he's decided, I'm all in.
16:05I've totally screwed my reputation.
16:06I might as well be all in for this guy.
16:09And he is.
16:10And it's such a human tragedy, and it's a national tragedy.
16:14Oh, my God, what a compassionate way to look at it.
16:19I'm looking at that guy being like, you raggedy bitch.
16:28I have to admit your interpretation is better.
16:31Senator Schiff, what do you say to all the people out there who are furious about this and just want
16:37Congress to do something?
16:39Yeah.
16:40It's obviously not going to happen under this administration.
16:43We're going to continue to fight to get these materials out, make sure there is accountability.
16:51During this administration, at least in the form of exposure, and I understand the victims out there have every reason
16:59to be skeptical, because they haven't seen it yet.
17:02And by the way, they didn't see it during the Biden administration either.
17:05Yeah, that's true.
17:06That's true.
17:07Their skepticism is well-deserved.
17:10But we're just going to have to keep fighting and make sure that it happens.
17:24Michael and Hassan, watch the clip.
17:26Tell me, what is the story?
17:29Oh, Fulton County.
17:30That's in Georgia?
17:32The FBI is going into Fulton County to find out if there was voter fraud.
17:38Yes, the story is Trump is teasing a government takeover of our local elections in advance of the fall midterms.
17:46Now, thankfully, Virginia Senator Mark Warner has some strong words for the president.
17:50It's beyond wacky.
17:52That's right.
17:53It's wacky.
17:53It's kooky.
17:55It's zany.
17:56The story started years ago, but it really blew up last week when the FBI took that midnight train down
18:03to Georgia.
18:03FBI agents this week descended on the Fulton County Elections Office near Atlanta, seizing ballots, voter rolls, and scanner images,
18:11even though investigations have found zero evidence to support Trump's false claims of election fraud.
18:18Now, if you don't find the evidence, that means you still keep doing it, right?
18:22It's kind of like when your mom tells you, like, it's in the drawer, and you're like, Mom, it's not...
18:27She goes, you better check that drawer.
18:30One element that's drawn a lot of scrutiny is the involvement of the director of national intelligence, yes, former Miss,
18:37uh, Pepe Le Pew, Tulsi Gabbard.
18:41What was Tulsi Gabbard doing down there in Georgia?
18:44It's a great question, Roy, and the answer is obvious.
18:48Nobody knows.
18:49She says she went down there because Trump told her to go down there.
18:53Trump says he didn't tell her to go down there, uh, Pam Bondi told her to go down there.
18:59I'm guessing she went down there because Satan sent her down there.
19:03You want answers as to why Tulsi was down there?
19:06The one person you don't need to ask, Deputy Attorney General Todd Blanche.
19:12Why was the director of national intelligence, Tulsi Gabbard, present at a, an FBI raid?
19:20First of all, it wasn't an FBI raid.
19:23Um, it was a, a search warrant being executed by, by FBI agents in the middle of the day.
19:28Why was she, why was she there?
19:29And secondly, I don't, I, uh, secondly, I don't know why the director was there.
19:35This wasn't a raid.
19:37This was FBI agents in FBI jackets over the opposition of Fulton County authorities barging
19:45in, seizing ballot boxes.
19:47Oh, wait a minute.
19:47That is a raid.
19:48Yeah.
19:50Well, Tulsi, uh, did something that was a little unusual in the midst of all the criticism.
19:55Uh, she did a perfectly normal four-page letter explaining why she went to Georgia.
20:01And it wasn't just to go to the Coca-Cola museum.
20:04She told lawmakers, quote, my presence was requested by the president.
20:10Of Russia?
20:13Why doesn't that add up?
20:14Because Trump said he didn't send her.
20:17That's what I heard.
20:19Trump says Pam Bondi was the one that sent Tulsi Gabbard to Georgia.
20:24Here's the president on Thursday after Tulsi sent her letter.
20:27They say, why is she doing it, right, Pam?
20:30Why is she doing it?
20:32Because Pam wanted her to do it.
20:34She threw Pam under the bus.
20:35That's like when you ever, I don't know if you've ever been in police interrogation and
20:38you snitching on your partner the whole time.
20:43Never mind.
20:44Let's, you know.
20:45What thing happened during the FBI raid that would suggest that Trump had more knowledge
20:49of the raid than what he alleges in the clip we just showed?
20:53Gabbard literally called him right after the raid and said, hey, talk to the FBI, guys.
20:57They're big fans, right?
20:58Points.
20:59Oh.
21:00According to the New York Times, in a meeting at the Bureau's Atlanta field office right
21:04after the raid, quote, the president addressed the agents on speakerphone, asking them questions
21:09as well as praising and thanking them for their work on the inquiry.
21:14Wait, speakerphone?
21:16Why is espionage so sloppy?
21:18In Tulsi's defense, it was her shoe phone.
21:22Senator Mark Warner doesn't think Trump should have taken the call at all.
21:27Somebody in the White House doesn't know the basic tenets of the Constitution or what
21:31the role of the president is in a domestic criminal investigation.
21:35It's wacky.
21:36It's beyond wacky.
21:37It's practically quixotic.
21:39It's just.
21:40Now, this isn't just about Georgia.
21:42In a Thursday night tweet storm, Trump posted a full video full of lies about the 2020 election
21:48to his Truth Social account, but it wasn't the election stuff that got people talking
21:52about what he tweeted.
21:54Question.
21:56What about the video made people's jaw drop?
22:00So, the president tweeted out a video of Barack and Michelle Obama's heads on ape bodies.
22:09They look beautiful even then.
22:13Wait, wait, wait.
22:13So, just so I'm clear, they uploaded a racist video, but they chose the best images from
22:18Getty Images?
22:19That is right.
22:20Yes.
22:21The video included depictions of Barack and Michelle Obama as primates.
22:28Watch.
22:28Fierce backlash today after the president posted and then later removed a racist video depicting
22:34former president Barack Obama and first lady Michelle Obama as apes.
22:39Now, we're choosing not to show it, but the images appear at the end of a video that pushes
22:43false claims that voting machines helped steal the 2020 election.
22:47Now, if you delete it, as the White House did, can you unburn a cross?
22:56The answer is no.
22:57Question.
22:58Can anyone tell me how press secretary Caroline Levitt justified the video?
23:04Yes.
23:05How is this the only news story you know?
23:07I only receive black shit.
23:11So, she said that it was depicting Barack and Michelle as the king and queen of the jungle,
23:20like the Lion King.
23:25It's Mufasa, Simba, and Sarabi that are at the top.
23:29That's right.
23:30But you're now getting it mixed up because he made them racist Rafiki, and that's not cool.
23:35Well, I'm feeling doubly upset.
23:37First, with the horrible racist nature of what they posted, but in that video, if you see
23:42the original video, I am portrayed as a giraffe.
23:45Hmm.
23:46Oh, a snake.
23:47Well, aren't you lucky?
23:48Well, I thought so, but they didn't use my best Getty image.
23:55Let's hear Caroline Levitt's justification for the racism.
24:00This is from an internet meme video depicting President Trump as the king of the jungle
24:04and Democrats as characters from the Lion King.
24:07Please stop reporting the fake outrage and report on something today that actually matters
24:12to the American public.
24:14They love to deliberately provoke.
24:17It distracts from other problems that they have.
24:20They wait and they see whether the outrage is bipartisan.
24:23In this case, they did get bipartisan pushback, and they decided, okay, there are some friends
24:29of ours who are, we're making their life difficult, so let's just take it down.
24:33In the midst of everything that's been going on with the Epstein files, Trump has been saying
24:39that there's something he wants to do with our elections.
24:44What is it exactly the president plans for our elections panel?
24:47He wants to hold the elections in Greenland.
24:50The president wants to nationalize our elections.
24:53Here's Trump in the Oval Office this week.
24:55I don't know why the federal government doesn't do them anyway.
24:57Look at the facts that are coming out, rigged, crooked elections.
25:01If we have areas, take a look at Detroit, take a look at Pennsylvania, take a look at
25:07Philadelphia, you go take a look at Atlanta.
25:09So just take a look at Democratic cities where black people vote for Democrats, is what he's
25:14saying.
25:15That's what it felt like.
25:16In addition to Trump saying that about nationalized elections, you also had Epstein
25:20Bestie and a parent podcaster, Steve Bannon, who had this to say about the matter.
25:24You're damn right.
25:26We're going to have ICE surround the polls come November.
25:29We're not going to sit here and allow you to steal the country again.
25:33And you can whine and cry and throw your toys out of the pram all you want, but we will
25:38never again allow an election to be stolen.
25:41What the hell does ICE have to do with elections anyway?
25:45They're immigration and customs enforcement.
25:46Unless you want to use them for voter intimidation.
25:48I do.
25:49You want to intimidate.
25:51Could it happen?
25:52Could they be deployed that way?
25:53You can't rule anything out.
25:55I think if they do that, it's going to be like Minneapolis times 10,000 in polling places
26:01all over this country.
26:03I think you would just increase voter turnout.
26:05People aren't going to take that.
26:07We need to turn out in such massive numbers.
26:09We need to run up the margin of our victory so big that they can't contest it.
26:14And our response has to be, hell no.
26:17We are going to oppose you with everything we can.
26:20And we're going to show you that 30-point swing in Texas was child's play when it comes
26:25to the midterms.
26:28There was one more politician that I thought had an interesting take on supposed election
26:32fraud.
26:33I know we're in the Alice in Wonderland, up is down, down is up, but this is beyond wacky
26:38and bizarre.
26:39That's a triple wacky, which means everybody in the audience gets a free taffy.
26:54Welcome back.
26:56It's time for the Offend-O-Meter.
26:58Teams have to tell us who's the offender, what they did, and who they offended.
27:02Give me an offender.
27:04Panel, who is this offender?
27:07This is a character in a one-hour drama.
27:11Michael, what are we thinking?
27:12I think it's CBS.
27:13CBS.
27:14I think it's procedural.
27:16The good wife.
27:16Yeah, the good wife.
27:17This is the good wife.
27:18So that's Julianne Margulies?
27:19Sure, let's go with that.
27:20Somebody who's upset with Julianne Margulies.
27:23Something's happened to my daughter.
27:24Let me talk to you.
27:25You're smarter.
27:28No way.
27:30That is South Carolina Congresswoman Nancy Mace.
27:34Oh.
27:35Ah, yes.
27:35Seen here.
27:36Finding out that the movie Transformers is not about gender identity.
27:42Nancy Mace offended her own former staffers.
27:46Oh.
27:47How did Nancy Mace offend her former staffers?
27:51She lied about drinking.
27:54Am I close?
27:55Yeah, you're pretty...
27:56I'm pretty.
27:58She lied about drinking?
27:59She lied saying that I don't drink?
28:01She said she has some sort of disease or disorder that prevents her from drinking as just an
28:06excuse for something.
28:07And then her staffer said, she drinks like a fish.
28:11Mace offended her staff by reportedly creating a toxic work environment and being generally
28:15unhinged in the office place.
28:17In a wide-ranging New York Magazine article published this week, ex-staffers say Mace would
28:23order them to bring her liquor after midnight, make them help with house chores, and her
28:29staff had to create burner accounts to defend her online, and she had them go on Reddit forums
28:35about the hottest women in Congress and boost her standings in the rankings.
28:42What excuse did Nancy Mace give for all of this misbehaving, allegedly?
28:48Well, she denied all of it.
28:49So that's her excuse.
28:50She lied.
28:51She denied it all.
28:53Specifically, she said there's no way the accusations about her drinking could ever be
28:58true.
28:59I had to come out with a genetic condition that I've had of all my life.
29:03I'm not allowed to drink or consume much in the way of alcohol.
29:06It's called hemochromatosis.
29:08If you do, it'll destroy your organs, and you'll die at an early age.
29:12And I love life, and I love living.
29:14Yeah, I love life, I love living.
29:15Also, white claws don't count, right?
29:19The drinking is like, hey, this is a stressful job.
29:22The burner accounts is like, you're really getting to me, comment section.
29:26Get on Reddit and tell them I'm pretty.
29:30Tell them I'm cute.
29:32Use the word voluptuous.
29:35Get to it, Baldrate 79.
29:39So you say you have a condition where you can't drink, but what is the problem with Nancy Mace
29:44using a I can't drink defense?
29:46I'll bet it's because that condition doesn't prevent you from drinking?
29:50I'm going to say that condition doesn't exist.
29:53She made it up.
29:54I like yours better.
29:55Now, Nancy Mace may have this genetic condition, but hemochromatosis doesn't mean you can't
30:00drink.
30:01And we know that this has not prevented Nancy Mace from drinking, because Nancy Mace has
30:07been appearing all over social media with what definitely looks like alcohol.
30:15If you're going to claim you don't drink, don't go out in public and be seen drinking.
30:20But if you do, you probably don't want to wear your member pin.
30:23That's just my advice.
30:26So Mace has been an online character for years, and she became a meme in December of 2024.
30:32It was because of this tweet.
30:34Let's just start with the tweet.
30:35Kids and their dad took me out for barbecue for my birthday.
30:3947 never felt so good.
30:41Well, happy birthday to me.
30:42Why did that poster go viral?
30:44She's not 47?
30:45Let's go back to the picture.
30:47Take a long look at that picture panel and ask yourself, why did this picture go viral?
30:52Is it because she doesn't have any meat, but she's at a barbecue place?
30:56It's because people couldn't stop looking at the sloppy cardboard container of wet beans.
31:04Mace's critics immediately latched on to the beans, saying things like, quote, this photo
31:09kind of explains why she's so passionate about bathroom.
31:13Then there were Photoshopped images of Nancy drinking beans.
31:19And then some people didn't even Photoshop.
31:21They just flat out just said stuff to her online.
31:23They just said, that's a lot of beans, you nasty ass bitch.
31:30God forbid a woman gets some fiber.
31:33That was Offend-Demeter.
31:46Welcome back.
31:47It's time for Live Curious.
31:49Here's how it's going to go.
31:50I'll give you three biographical details about a public figure, but only one is true.
31:55You have to guess which is the truth and which are nasty, ghastly lies.
31:59Time for three facts about Baboni.
32:05See him here, waiting for his prom date to arrive.
32:09Our facts are, his aunt choreographed the Macarena.
32:13He has a tattoo of the Pokemon Go logo.
32:16He calls Charo every Sunday.
32:19Team Amber.
32:20He does have a Pokemon Go tattoo.
32:22Okay.
32:23I'm just guessing.
32:24No, I'm totally with you on number two.
32:26That seems very credible.
32:28We're going to go with number three.
32:29He calls Charo every Sunday.
32:31I'm going to go with number three.
32:32Baboni has a tattoo of the Pokemon Go logo.
32:36Not only does he have the tattoo, he even included footage of him getting the tattoo in a music video.
32:47I thought it was going to be like Charizard or Eevee.
32:52But it was just Pokemon Go, the words.
32:56That's so odd.
32:58Still love him.
32:58He is headlining this year's Super Bowl 60 in San Francisco doing the halftime show.
33:04And it's been a performance that conservatives have been freaking out about.
33:08What name has at least one politician given to the Super Bowl now that Bad Bunny is performing?
33:15What would you rename the Super Bowl?
33:17The Super Bowl.
33:18The Super Bowl.
33:18Oh, that's good.
33:19Well, here's our favorite senator repping Alabama while living in Florida, Senator Tommy Tuberville.
33:25I call it the Woke Bowl because we're getting more and more woke.
33:28And we've got Bad Bunny or Bad Rabbit at halftime.
33:30I'll be watching the TPUSA halftime show.
33:35But it's just unfortunate we've gotten to this point.
33:38There are three great things about Bad Bunny performing.
33:41One is he's going to be there.
33:43One is Tuberville is not going to be there.
33:46And Donald Trump is not going to be there.
33:48So there are three great things about the Super Bowl.
33:52Conservatives have already said that they're not going to be watching the Woke Bowl.
33:55Instead, they're going to be watching Turning Point, USA's all-American halftime show featuring Kid Rock.
34:03The group also says the show will celebrate faith, family, and freedom.
34:08And they're going to stream their show at the same time as the real halftime show.
34:13So it'll be easy to just flip on over to whatever website it's on and then figure out the login.
34:20And then you realize you don't have an account.
34:22And then you open an account and then they send you the email confirmation.
34:26You confirm that and then you set your password.
34:29And then they give you a six-digit verification.
34:32You got two factors.
34:33Yeah, but then you can finally see the Turning Point, USA, All-American Bowl, the last two minutes of it.
34:41The Kid Rock concert is also going to feature country singers Brantley Gilbert, Gabby Barrett, and Lee Bryce.
34:47Apparently because Bryce Gerbert and Grant Lee Brantford were busy.
34:54That brings us to a fun minigame, panel, called Which One of These People is Brantley Gilbert?
35:00Yay!
35:02Which one of these people is Brantley Gilbert?
35:06Wow.
35:06One of the performers at the TPUSA halftime show.
35:09Okay, well, let's see.
35:10Hello, my name is Brantley Gilbert.
35:12Hello, my name is Brantley Gilbert.
35:14Hey, my name is Brantley Gilbert.
35:16It's the girl.
35:16Yep.
35:17Brantley Gilbert is this guy right here on the right.
35:22Chest tattoo!
35:22It was chest tattoo.
35:23Yeah, chest tattoo.
35:24Is that Pokemon?
35:25No.
35:27Of the two left, which one of these people is Lee Bryce?
35:31Oh, man.
35:32I'm Lee Bryce.
35:33I'm Lee Bryce.
35:34It's the girl.
35:36It is the guy who looks like Gerard Butler's butler.
35:41That is Lee Bryce.
35:43We didn't get to Gabby Barrett, but I'll download some of her tracks.
35:47This has been Like Curious.
35:48More after the break.
36:00Welcome back.
36:01It's time for Missing Words.
36:03Here's your headline.
36:04Boxer loses blank, but not the fight, in a bizarre bout moment.
36:10It's got to be pants, right?
36:12Boxer loses shorts.
36:13Oh, I saw it and I remember.
36:16What?
36:16He got hit in the face and his toupee went...
36:23Your algorithm really is just black news.
36:26It's just black news.
36:28Boxer loses toupee, but not fight, in a bizarre bout moment.
36:34Here in New York at Madison Square Garden last week, boxer Jarrell Big Baby Miller had a very,
36:39very exciting fight, and I think you're going to want to see this for yourself.
36:45Fighter is getting the hair knocked off his head, Sergio!
36:49Wow!
36:50That social media, that's like a cartoon!
36:55Oh, my goodness gracious!
36:58I just don't get it.
36:59Boxing is a sport where you can be bold.
37:02Mm-hmm.
37:03Like, we've accepted bold fighters over the decades.
37:07You can just be bold.
37:09Now, Big Baby had a pretty good attitude about it all.
37:12The boxer went on Breakfast Club on Monday.
37:14Oh, no.
37:15And he said he thought something had happened between rounds, but he knew what he had to do to be
37:22sure.
37:23I'm going to look at the Jumbotron, because the Jumbotron is going to have to replay.
37:25Yeah.
37:26So when I went like this...
37:27Ridiculous.
37:27And I said, oh, shit, they got me.
37:33Why...
37:37Why does he still have the fringe, Roy?
37:42Why does he still have the fringe?
37:44What if this was just a strategy?
37:46Okay.
37:47He's like, this man is going to hit me in the face, and my shit's going to go flippy-floppy.
37:52He's going to look up here, back.
37:54Brilliant.
37:56He won the fight.
37:57It worked.
37:59Here's your headline.
38:01Blank claims at Winter Olympics being looked into by anti-doping agency.
38:08CBD gummies?
38:09It's so much wackier.
38:10Is it acid?
38:12Acid of a sort.
38:13LSD.
38:14Mm-hmm.
38:15CB2.
38:16I mean, I know some shit.
38:18You want to say it, Michael, with me?
38:19Penis injections.
38:21Penis injection claims at Winter Olympics being looked into by anti-doping agency.
38:29What are they injecting?
38:30I can actually explain this.
38:31Do you want to hear it?
38:32Yeah, please.
38:34Male Olympic ski jumpers are allegedly injecting some sort of substance into their genitalia.
38:41Hyaluronic acid.
38:42I'm going to demonstrate why.
38:44I'm going to come over here.
38:46Please don't.
38:47Do you know the suit?
38:48Very tight-fitting, right?
38:49If you inject and you add length, what happens is you create an effect, a sail under your suit.
38:57So as you're going like this, you're actually getting more lift, and it increases your distance.
39:06Oh, my God!
39:08So there need to be more black ski jumpers?
39:14Here's the BBC explaining exactly what the injection does.
39:18It can be used to increase penis circumference by one or two centimeters.
39:22If your suit has a 5% bigger surface area, you fly further.
39:25You've got to shorten the headline.
39:27Just say, Olympians are taking dick steroids to become flying squirrels.
39:34Well, I can tell you one Olympic sport where having a bigger member does not help you.
39:39Here's French pole vaulter Anthony Rattie, who was the most popular guy at the 2024 Olympics.
39:48Percy, but not at all on the social media.
39:51Oh, that's very good, that's very, very good.
39:53Look, look, hop, and then...
39:56That's missing words.
39:58More after the break.
40:06Time for a game called Who's That Baby?
40:09I'll show you a famous person's baby picture, and you tell me, who's that baby?
40:15Let's see our baby.
40:17Number one, they're an American icon, but they were born in Germany.
40:20They appear as themselves in a James Bond movie and a Mission Impossible movie.
40:24As themselves?
40:25As themselves.
40:26And they're famous for being able to handle any situation.
40:31Who is it?
40:31That is Wolf Blitzer, right there.
40:34Wait, is it?
40:36That baby is Wolf Blitzer.
40:39Come on.
40:39Unbelievable.
40:41Question on to the panel.
40:42What surprising award show has Wolf Blitzer been a regular presenter at in the past?
40:48BET Awards.
40:51Points.
40:53Is that real?
40:54Yes.
40:56Wolf Blitzer was a regular presenter at the BET Soul Train Awards.
41:00In fact, we got the footage.
41:01No.
41:02Here he is doing the Dougie with Dougie Fresh.
41:05Don't do it, please.
41:08No.
41:13He is not Wolfie Fresh.
41:16That was Who's That Baby?
41:18I want to thank our guests, Senator Adam Schiff and Hassan Minhaj.
41:21And of course, thank you to our team captains, Amber Ruffin and Michael Ian Black.
41:27Hassan Minhaj's Doesn't Know podcast available in all the usual places and a video version
41:33on CNN All Access.
41:34Before we sign off, here are a few more stories we're watching.
41:38King Charles runs into his brother at the family reunion.
41:44Olympian realizes he never learned the second part of the trick.
41:50I'm Roy Woodjury and I'll see you next week for another episode of Have I Got News for You.
41:54And there are still seats available for the Turning Point USA Halftime Show.
42:00Good night.
Comments