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Girl Climber [Full Movie] [Full Storyline]Full EP - Full
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00:00:06Oh
00:00:30Let's go.
00:01:10Rito, open that up.
00:01:12Come on.
00:01:13Get it open.
00:01:16I totally knew it.
00:01:18I totally knew it.
00:01:21What is it?
00:01:23It's a rope.
00:01:24Get rid of that box.
00:01:26Another 12 year old would love a rope for Christmas.
00:01:29Yeah.
00:01:31Yeah.
00:01:31Come on, Em.
00:01:33Yeah.
00:01:34Woo!
00:01:35Yeah!
00:01:37Yeah!
00:01:38Yeah!
00:01:39Yeah!
00:01:39Yeah!
00:01:45Emily.
00:01:46Emily.
00:01:47Emily, where are we?
00:01:48I don't know.
00:01:50I don't know.
00:01:51We're at El Capitan.
00:01:57From Colorado, Emily Harrington.
00:02:02She's certainly a force to be reckoned with.
00:02:06Emily, make it look easy.
00:02:12Five-time national champion.
00:02:22But Emily is certainly one of the most well-rounded American female climbers.
00:02:27Part of your brain knows that this is slightly illogical.
00:02:32It is dangerous.
00:02:33But life's boring if you don't have that little element of spice, right?
00:02:38We should try to get a little bit more comfortable with being afraid.
00:02:46I love exploring my perceived limit and trying to push past it.
00:02:55Oh, man.
00:03:20Yeah, all of that.
00:03:21Oh, man.
00:03:22I'm sure we originally got a good train.
00:03:22But, you know, I got a good train with him.
00:03:23Oh, man.
00:03:23Yeah, I got something.
00:03:28Are you biting my nose?
00:03:45We got fire.
00:03:47I think this is my pee bottle.
00:03:51Nope, it's just a normal water bottle.
00:03:59A little flare in the van.
00:04:15I'm really proud of my career so far, but if you want to call yourself a successful all-around
00:04:21climber, you've got to be up on El Cap.
00:04:26There it is, in all its glory.
00:04:31El Capitan.
00:04:47It's always surprising how big it is.
00:04:50I never think, oh, like, it doesn't look that bad, or it doesn't look that big.
00:04:54It's always fucking so big.
00:04:58I don't know why no one talks about how scary it is.
00:05:04I wish I could not feel afraid anymore.
00:05:11El Capitan is a 3,200-foot granite face.
00:05:18It doesn't get much bigger, doesn't get much more difficult, doesn't get much more high
00:05:24quality than El Cap.
00:05:28It's just the most impressive, most beautiful stone in the world, and it's so hard to free
00:05:35climb.
00:05:38When you look at El Cap, it looks impossible, it looks smooth, and you can't imagine what
00:05:43there would be to climb it.
00:05:45It always attracted people that are curious to push themselves to the highest level.
00:05:52For decades, climbers have been testing themselves up there.
00:05:58Climbing El Capitan is the most badass thing that you can do, as a human.
00:06:04With the exception of Lynn Hill, and a few other women, it's very much like a boys club.
00:06:13When I started climbing, the first person I learned about was Lynn Hill.
00:06:18She was the first to free climb a route on El Capitan called the Nose.
00:06:23And then the following year, she went back and free climbed it in a day, which was the
00:06:30most groundbreaking, astonishing achievement.
00:06:34I didn't feel like I needed to prove anything after that, because I was at the age where I
00:06:39wanted to have a kid, I wanted to have a family, and having the freedom to just go rock climbing
00:06:45was not going to happen forever.
00:06:47At a certain point, you have to be happy with what you've done.
00:07:02I was in Yosemite looking for a project, some sort of inspiration.
00:07:08I was working on my personal quest to free solo El Cap on the Freerider, and she was willing
00:07:13to go up the wall to support me for a day of climbing.
00:07:15I got really excited, because climbing with Alex on El Cap is like playing basketball with
00:07:20Michael Jordan.
00:07:21It's like you're with the best of the best.
00:07:25First time I met Emily was at a cliff called Jail House.
00:07:28She was already a very established, very successful climber.
00:07:32She was a lot better than me.
00:07:34And the thing that really made an impression was that she was all kind of done up, and she
00:07:37had earrings and things.
00:07:38And I was like, man, how can someone climb that hard with earrings?
00:07:42She was just so well put together, and going to college, and doing the hardest thing at
00:07:46the cliff.
00:07:46Everything about it was just different than what I was living.
00:07:49I was like, whoa, that's a different level.
00:07:53You could tell he just didn't really care about anything but climbing.
00:07:57And he is very famous for free soloing, which is rock climbing without a rope.
00:08:04No person does what he does at his level.
00:08:11I was incredibly inspired by the way he moved.
00:08:16He was so perfect.
00:08:19He seems so at ease, and I've always envied that.
00:08:23With the green ground, you can climb up to the spire and like reflake the rope and manage.
00:08:28I'm just trying to nurture you into a simul-climbing machine.
00:08:35Good work.
00:08:37Yeah, good work.
00:08:39Good work.
00:08:40That was good.
00:08:41There's no way I would have done any of that without you.
00:08:44Isn't that pretty rad?
00:08:45That was pretty rad.
00:08:46That was a life experience.
00:08:48Yeah.
00:08:49I don't think you can do that in a day.
00:08:51You do?
00:08:52Yeah.
00:08:53I don't think it'd be that bad for you, because you just have the base fitness that you need,
00:08:56you know?
00:08:56Yeah.
00:08:57It'd definitely be a dream.
00:08:59Yeah, it'd be sick.
00:09:00It's got to start somewhere.
00:09:01Yeah.
00:09:03I mean, you know.
00:09:05That's when I first thought of trying to free climb El Cap in less than 24 hours.
00:09:12Climbing it in a day is the epitome of hard rock climbing.
00:09:16And there's a desire to prove myself.
00:09:18Like, I do deserve to be here.
00:09:20I do deserve to be climbing with all of these people that I've looked up to and idolized
00:09:25for a long time.
00:09:27That's awesome.
00:09:28That's pretty good.
00:09:29I was staggered too.
00:09:31It's the sense of belonging that I want.
00:09:48I see some big wet streaks, but I also see dry rock, so it's kind of a mixed bag up
00:09:55there.
00:09:57It is not going to change a single thing.
00:10:03Most people free climb El Cap over five days or so.
00:10:06It's so much harder to free climb El Cap in a day.
00:10:11The difference between doing a multi-day ascent and doing a one-day ascent is huge.
00:10:16To climb that thing in a day, it's outrageous.
00:10:19It's an audacious undertaking.
00:10:23I'm left wondering whether she can pull it off.
00:10:28Most people who free climb El Cap in a day have done it via the free rider because it's the
00:10:33easiest route.
00:10:34I wanted to do a more challenging route, and that's why I chose Golden Gate.
00:10:41There are very few climbers who have free climbed any route on El Cap in a day other than the
00:10:46free rider.
00:10:47Golden Gate is quite a bit harder.
00:10:50Golden Gate has only been free climbed in a day by three people.
00:10:53Three of the best El Cap climbers in the world.
00:11:00These guys are heroes of mine, and I want to be a part of that group.
00:11:11Golden Gate has 34 pitches.
00:11:14My goal is to climb from the beginning of each pitch to the end without falling.
00:11:19That will be a free ascent.
00:11:21If I fall, I have to go back to the beginning of that pitch and try again.
00:11:26And I need to do this in under 24 hours.
00:11:36That's going to be really hard for her.
00:11:38I give her a 20% chance of sending, honestly.
00:11:42She just hasn't paid her dues like Honnold has.
00:11:52It's hard to put yourself out there and say you're going to try to do the hardest thing you've ever
00:11:57done.
00:11:58Just because I'm trying to protect myself from people finding out that I'm afraid or that I fail or that
00:12:04I'm just like everyone else.
00:12:08I mean, I don't want to say it's mansplaining, but primarily there's men that have accomplished this goal.
00:12:13And so it's like I get a lot of advice and it's a lot of like, oh, you need to
00:12:18be committed to this and you need to go here for this amount of time and you need to do
00:12:21it this way.
00:12:22And you should be doing this and you should be doing that.
00:12:24I've been climbing for 22 years.
00:12:27Like I know how to approach a goal.
00:12:31I don't need someone to tell me how to do it.
00:12:35But obviously that's a hard, that's a hard thing to convince yourself of as well.
00:12:40It's hard for me to convince myself that I know what I'm doing.
00:12:44Do you think I need more than one three?
00:12:45I wouldn't even take the three.
00:12:46Oh my God.
00:12:48Maybe I don't need this and two purples.
00:12:51I always had it in my mind ever since he asked me to support him that he would probably be
00:12:56willing to support me on Golden Gate.
00:12:59I'd like to think I may be the best supporter in the world for El Cap just because I know
00:13:04the roots really well.
00:13:05I've worked on them a long time.
00:13:06I don't think anyone has climbed any of those parts of the wall faster.
00:13:09Are you climbing the monster with just one six?
00:13:11Yeah.
00:13:12Awesome.
00:13:12And I wanted to help Emily achieve this big dream of hers.
00:13:16Alex is very comfortable, very confident, but I also trust him.
00:13:20Having someone up there who you can tell is right at home makes me feel that much more comfortable.
00:13:27I'll give you that.
00:13:28Go up and try your best and...
00:13:30That's all I'm doing.
00:13:30I'm just going to go try.
00:13:31Move by move, you just do your best and see how it plays out.
00:13:34I'm allowed to fall.
00:13:36Yeah, I mean, that's the beautiful thing you ever rope.
00:13:38It's like a good shit.
00:13:40I'm really happy that I have a rope.
00:13:41No.
00:13:45No.
00:13:46You're supposed to leave right at home.
00:13:47We're out here, boy!
00:13:53Woo!
00:13:54Oh, my gosh.
00:13:56Yes.
00:13:57Oh, my gosh.
00:13:58Some water!
00:14:16Remember climbing mountains fun
00:14:34the way that I climb the bottom 2,000 feet of the route with Alex is something called simul climbing
00:14:40so I'm leading placing gear and Alex is following climbing at the same time as me so we're moving up
00:14:47the wall together and it enables you to move a lot faster but it cuts some corners because you're placing
00:14:55less safety equipment between yourself and your partner so if either
00:14:59of us falls we can get severely injured or we could die but this is really the only way to
00:15:05climb it in a day I was kind of proud of myself honestly yeah that was good thank you I
00:15:12just hand over hand on the roof I was like what's that
00:15:34that was the easiest that the monster has ever felt but it's still really hard that was way faster than
00:15:41ever before oh yeah yeah like 45 minutes
00:15:44you find 2,000 feet already you may as well climb one more picture I'm gonna try I don't know
00:15:52if I can though of course you can just get in there and engage
00:15:59all right you need someone to like punch in the nuts
00:16:00I don't have nuts ovaries
00:16:15you're doing great thank you I really appreciate it I'm really digging deep here you know
00:16:18this is uh this is my first effort yeah do you think it's worth giving it one to the death
00:16:24effort
00:16:25I mean I've been trying to give it to the death yeah what is that to the death it seems
00:16:29a little
00:16:29like worky if we decide to go down let's fully debrief like what are you going to do differently what
00:16:35are you going to do better where can you save energy yeah because I mean obviously there's a ton of
00:16:40room for
00:16:40improvement today a lot of room for improvement
00:16:47yeah that's crazy
00:16:52it just went from perfectly okay to perfectly not okay
00:16:58oh oh my god it hurts so bad
00:17:06hey give me a hug you needed a hug from you all day thank you these bruises are just all
00:17:12from one
00:17:13pitch I was secretly happy that we got rained off because everything just felt so hard
00:17:24I don't really foresee me trying again this spring I'm kind of worked over from the season
00:17:31I didn't feel ready
00:17:34and I haven't put in the work in order to be successful
00:17:55well that was her first wetsuit
00:17:58look at how tiny that little thing is
00:18:01here you go here's a bunch of trophies
00:18:05climbing stuff first place
00:18:10junior nationals
00:18:12oh when she was 12 years old
00:18:15I don't remember what that one was
00:18:19what's that one from
00:18:22zero shovel oh yeah this is the world cup she won
00:18:28oh there's a little mohawk look at that mohawk
00:18:35I would say I had like a very normal childhood
00:18:40my dad was really into any activity that was in the mountains
00:18:45ski
00:18:51growing up I had this idea that girls were inferior in some way
00:18:58desperately wanted to prove that I wasn't like that
00:19:05I grew up with my two cousins who were boys
00:19:08and we were super competitive with each other
00:19:11all I wanted to do was be better than them
00:19:15I wanted to do well in everything
00:19:18and I tried really hard
00:19:24when I found climbing
00:19:25this switch went off
00:19:29it was like instantly that's what I wanted to do
00:19:34the feeling of lightness and strength and invincibility was pretty profound
00:19:46I liked the feeling of success
00:19:52and if I didn't measure up to that
00:19:57I was so upset and disappointed
00:20:04competitions
00:20:05being the best
00:20:07winning
00:20:07to me that was what climbing was
00:20:14I
00:20:16definitely started putting more pressure on myself
00:20:19my self-worth was so tied to my success in climbing
00:20:24and then my success in climbing was tied to my weight
00:20:29the less mass you have the easier it's going to be to stay on the wall
00:20:35it just became this cycle of punishment
00:20:38I remember being completely exhausted all the time
00:20:43she was so thin
00:20:46and I didn't know what to do
00:20:48and I remember her hands were orange
00:20:50because all she was eating was carrots
00:20:53and I wasn't sleeping well
00:20:55and I was dizzy sometimes
00:21:00and then climbing wasn't very fun
00:21:04I feel like I barely laughed
00:21:08I started realizing that this isn't how I want to live my life
00:21:13and is climbing going to be a positive force in my life
00:21:18or is it always going to be this negative thing
00:21:24I guess now is the best time
00:21:26and here is the best place to say this
00:21:28I have an eating disorder
00:21:30I can't admit it to anybody else
00:21:32but at least I can admit it to myself
00:21:35I feel out of control when I indulge in food
00:21:38and my all-or-nothing behavior makes me depressed and unhappy
00:21:43I don't ever give myself a break
00:21:45I want to be perfect all the time
00:21:47I must run fast, climb strong
00:21:51and eat as little as possible
00:22:01Eventually my body and my brain
00:22:03just couldn't really handle
00:22:04all the stress and the pressures
00:22:06I realized that competing wasn't something
00:22:09that I really wanted to do anymore
00:22:16The pivotal thing that happened
00:22:18was I joined the North Face athlete team
00:22:21and got invited on an expedition to Mount Everest
00:22:28I had no idea what it would do for me in my life
00:22:34She was keen to try out mountain climbing
00:22:38So it's like, oh, first mountain climbing trip
00:22:40How about Everest?
00:22:42A little bit crazy, but why not?
00:22:46It's the tallest and most precipitous mountain range on our planet
00:22:50If you want to test your mettle, that's where you go
00:22:53I remember just saying, Emily, no
00:22:57I do not want you going to Everest
00:22:59Tim said to her, you're not going
00:23:01and she said, Dad, I'm not 16
00:23:04and that was the end of that
00:23:08Emily at 25, barely coming out of the gym
00:23:11as a gym climber
00:23:13and then being on Everest
00:23:15I mean, that's a huge leap to make
00:23:17I was a little, like, dark in those days
00:23:21so I might have just totally written her off
00:23:25as a first impression, you know
00:23:27just kind of like, ugh, whatever
00:23:36It wasn't until I got there and realized
00:23:38that Conrad was, like, completely hands-off with Emily
00:23:41and he was like, well, you step in
00:23:42You know, and I'm like, I don't even know her
00:23:44I don't want to do this
00:23:45I'm not a mentor
00:23:47I was not very helpful
00:23:48I definitely am not an incredibly sympathetic person
00:23:58I'm ready to go up tomorrow
00:23:59I'm a little nervous and scared
00:24:03to go through the ice fall
00:24:06That's knowledge
00:24:09Happens, like, five times a day
00:24:11It's really unnerving
00:24:17I want to get through the ice fall
00:24:18and then I'll feel okay
00:24:28Conrad saw something in her
00:24:30and he was right
00:24:35She just didn't give in
00:24:42Emery, what's up?
00:24:44Nice job, Em
00:24:46I came to care
00:24:50immensely for Emily
00:24:51over the time of that trip
00:24:54We talked about my relationship
00:24:56we talked about my climbing
00:24:57we talked about her kids
00:24:58and how much she missed her kids
00:24:59and just life
00:25:01and it gave me a peek
00:25:03into what my life could be like
00:25:04in the future
00:25:11Hey
00:25:13I'm at the South Coal
00:25:16getting ready to go up for the summit
00:25:24Just stuck behind a line of people
00:25:28She passed me
00:25:29and she was by herself
00:25:30and I was like
00:25:30Emily, why are you by yourself?
00:25:31Where's the Sherpa
00:25:33that you were climbing with?
00:25:34She was like
00:25:34Oh God, I feel so bad
00:25:36He was slow
00:25:37so I left him behind
00:25:39Was that really bad?
00:25:40Should I go back and get him?
00:25:48She crushed it
00:25:51It was so out of her main sport
00:25:54that it just was all the more
00:25:57of a huge achievement
00:26:00As a climber
00:26:00you're the sum total
00:26:02of all your ascents
00:26:03and expeditions
00:26:04and each experience
00:26:06that you have
00:26:07builds into who you are
00:26:08as a climber
00:26:09and Emily got that
00:26:11I was a lot stronger
00:26:13than I thought I would be
00:26:14Climbing on Everest
00:26:15has made me appreciate
00:26:17the style of climbing
00:26:19that I do
00:26:20I do want to continue
00:26:22to be in the mountains
00:26:24and to learn from them
00:26:42Good morning
00:26:43Good morning
00:26:45Here's your coffee
00:26:50I stayed up late last night
00:26:51and got all these emails
00:26:52and texts with China
00:26:54and Nepal and Tibet
00:26:54and I'm like scared
00:26:55to turn on their phone
00:26:56and see what everyone wrote
00:26:59Come back to bed
00:27:00No
00:27:03I have an interview
00:27:04in 15 minutes
00:27:06Okay, I'll make breakfast
00:27:09Hi, this is Adrian
00:27:12Doing some final prep
00:27:14for a big trip
00:27:14I'm leaving on early next week
00:27:16You know, the average
00:27:17Everest expedition
00:27:18is two months long
00:27:20and I'm probably away
00:27:22you know, seven to eight
00:27:23months a year
00:27:24You're still traveling
00:27:25and climbing around the world
00:27:26I should have my time
00:27:28Adrian is a high altitude climber
00:27:31and a mountain guide
00:27:32who spends a lot of time
00:27:34in the Himalaya
00:27:35We met at Camp 2
00:27:36on Mount Everest
00:27:41I just remember this charismatic guy
00:27:44He was super nice
00:27:45and fun to talk to
00:27:48The sad fact of high altitude climbing
00:27:51is there's just not many women
00:27:53I certainly noticed Emily
00:27:55as an anomaly
00:27:57But 21,000 feet is really miserable
00:28:00So you kind of like have a crushing headache
00:28:02at the same time
00:28:03that you're trying to be like social
00:28:04and funny and interesting
00:28:05It's not like a great flirting opportunity
00:28:08It was this really powerful connection
00:28:10that we had
00:28:11I'd never felt like that
00:28:12with anyone before
00:28:14And we knew that we wanted to stay connected
00:28:19Adrian is gone most of the year
00:28:21guiding in the Himalaya
00:28:23And because I have this big project
00:28:25I'm working on
00:28:26we are going to spend the next four months apart
00:28:30I don't really look forward to this time of year
00:28:32as it is
00:28:33because
00:28:34Adrian is going to be gone
00:28:35for a really long time
00:28:36and
00:28:38I have a lot of
00:28:39like I put a lot of pressure on myself
00:28:41for my own projects
00:28:42No
00:28:46I've spent a lot of time with people
00:28:48who have lost their partner
00:28:49in the mountains
00:28:51and
00:28:51every time he leaves
00:28:53I
00:28:53have this part of me
00:28:55that is afraid
00:28:55he won't come back
00:29:02The secret stash
00:29:05Okay I'm overwhelmed again
00:29:06I'm going to go eat some toast
00:29:08I'm really overwhelmed right now
00:29:09Good luck
00:29:11Here we go
00:29:15It kind of sucks
00:29:20Cat stuff
00:29:21I have food
00:29:23Coffee stuff
00:29:24Music
00:29:25Music
00:29:27Music
00:29:27Bed
00:29:29Hmm
00:29:39And
00:29:40She's off
00:29:44It's always hard
00:29:46This one especially
00:29:48It's always hard
00:29:53It's always hard
00:29:55It's always hard
00:29:55It's always hard
00:29:55This one especially
00:29:58I'm going to Moab
00:30:00because I want to prepare
00:30:02for the upcoming
00:30:03Yosemite season
00:30:04and Moab is a great place
00:30:05to do that
00:30:08Last spring I just wasn't ready
00:30:10I hadn't put in the work
00:30:18Look at these nails too
00:30:19These are the gel nail
00:30:21Gel nail magic
00:30:22They're supposed to last
00:30:23for like three months
00:30:28I did not grow up
00:30:30learning how to crack climb
00:30:32and for climbing in Yosemite
00:30:34it's a required skill
00:30:46I wouldn't consider myself
00:30:47a super confident person
00:30:49when I'm standing on the ground
00:30:50It's more when I'm like
00:30:52climbing
00:30:53that my confidence shines through
00:31:04I think I did get better technique
00:31:07It's nice to feel a little more confidence
00:31:12I'm excited to go do something
00:31:23Thebabaru
00:31:24Theak
00:31:27is there
00:31:28Theak
00:31:28Theak
00:31:29Theak
00:31:29Theak
00:31:45I've been in Yosemite now for a few weeks training on Golden Gate.
00:31:49It's been long days hiking in and practicing the harder pitches.
00:31:54It's really the only way to know every pitch for that in a day attempt.
00:32:03There's five hard sections of the route for me.
00:32:07The first one that comes up is the monster.
00:32:10You have to kind of wedge your body into this crack.
00:32:14And this pitch is almost 200 feet long.
00:32:17The monster off-width is harder if your foot can't bridge the crack.
00:32:20My foot can span between one side of the crack and the other side, so I can easily wedge
00:32:24one foot and push upward.
00:32:26If you have a smaller foot, it's harder to make upward progress.
00:32:36The next pitch that's really hard for me is called the down climb.
00:32:41There's essentially no hold.
00:32:43You're kind of standing on a less than vertical, smooth surface, just pasting your feet on
00:32:51the wall and using the friction in order to stick.
00:32:54Come on.
00:32:55Your balance has to be pretty perfect in order to not get spit off.
00:33:01Oh, that was it.
00:33:05The next hard pitch is called the move.
00:33:08At the end of the pitch, there's a really hard boulder problem, so a series of really
00:33:13hard moves.
00:33:18For me, it's the most powerful section of the route.
00:33:21It has the hardest single moves.
00:33:26The next section is called the golden desert.
00:33:30It is a really long crack climb mixed with some funky traversing under a roof.
00:33:40And then the very next pitch after that is called the A5 traverse.
00:33:45And that's kind of the pitch that guards you from success.
00:33:50Imagine traversing this steep, sloping rail and trying to stand on feet that are the width
00:33:56of dimes.
00:33:58The A5 traverse is the spot where most people fail.
00:34:01By the time you've climbed almost 3,000 feet to get there, your arms are just incredibly
00:34:05tired and it's really hard to hang on them.
00:34:10I'm still a little nervous about the A5 traverse.
00:34:12...
00:34:27...
00:34:28...
00:34:28...
00:34:28...
00:34:42Thankfully, Adrian came home from Everest.
00:34:45Everything was fine, but there was weeks there
00:34:48where I thought he might not.
00:34:51It's not really that safe, even if you make good decisions.
00:34:54Is it true?
00:34:56That I thought you might die?
00:34:57Yeah.
00:35:00So you figured you'd start moving on right away?
00:35:03Yeah.
00:35:03I'm just going to be a bachelorette
00:35:06and be just in my little world, independent.
00:35:10It could happen.
00:35:11It could be the other way around.
00:35:13Yeah.
00:35:13I think I think about it less,
00:35:15but I think about it sometimes
00:35:16as you start speed climbing more and more,
00:35:18cutting corners, rock fall.
00:35:22There's plenty of things that can kill you.
00:35:23It's a little bit of a stretch, but I'm not going to die.
00:35:26I'm not going to die rock climbing.
00:35:28But you've got to think about it.
00:35:29I didn't acknowledge it's a possibility.
00:35:30It's true.
00:35:31I just think that I've finally, like,
00:35:35come to a place where I'm okay.
00:35:37Not okay, but more okay.
00:35:41More okay is good.
00:35:43Yeah.
00:35:50Okay, questions.
00:35:52Okay, get married already.
00:35:53When are you getting married?
00:35:54Are you going to have babies?
00:35:55Babies.
00:35:56Get married already.
00:35:58Do you plan on having kids soon?
00:36:01Okay.
00:36:04I do plan on having kids eventually, I think.
00:36:07I want one kid, so I'm not really in, like, a huge rush.
00:36:12I, I say we, right?
00:36:14We, I think I've come around on that.
00:36:17We kind of settled on one, because Adrian wanted, like, three.
00:36:20He wanted three.
00:36:21Um, but I just want one, so I'm not in a rush.
00:36:24And I have, like, we both have things we want to do first.
00:36:27I've got a couple about asking me about LCAP and what happened, and if I'm going back,
00:36:31like, basically, I, I failed, and I also had terrible weather, but that's, like, a second
00:36:37part of it, um, that prevented me from succeeding, and yes, I'm going back in the fall.
00:37:00So, we got two liters of water.
00:37:01Okay.
00:37:02I have extra chalk.
00:37:04Okay.
00:37:05Cool.
00:37:05I'm going to put the air on it.
00:37:06Are you taking that much extra chalk?
00:37:08I'm very concerned about the heat.
00:37:09For one note capers?
00:37:10It weighs nothing.
00:37:12I guess.
00:37:12It just, it seems like a lot of chalk for, yeah, cool.
00:37:15We don't have to bring it.
00:37:16No, no, you just.
00:37:17No, but I actually really want it.
00:37:18If you think it'll make you feel better, it's definitely for an airplane.
00:37:20Okay, extra chalk.
00:37:21I'm bringing these.
00:37:22It's really hot.
00:37:23What are those?
00:37:24They're breakable ice packs.
00:37:27For my hands and feet.
00:37:28Seems totally absurd.
00:37:30So, if we want to climb by three, what time should we meet in the meadow?
00:37:32Well, like, 2.30.
00:37:342.30.
00:37:36That's, like, pretty early, though.
00:37:37Pretty early.
00:37:58Okay.
00:38:06Nice chalk, up.
00:38:08Nice chalk up.
00:38:12Nice.
00:38:45Come on.
00:38:46Come on.
00:38:47Come on.
00:38:48Come on.
00:38:49Come on.
00:38:50Come on.
00:38:51Come on.
00:38:52Come on.
00:38:53Fuck yeah.
00:38:54Come on.
00:38:56Very good.
00:38:57Come on.
00:39:02Nice.
00:39:03Good job.
00:39:08If you do it today, in this style, just like you just did it, just
00:39:13be pretty sick.
00:39:16Think about how good that's going to feel.
00:39:18I can't yet.
00:39:19I've got to finish the rest of it.
00:39:28Yeah, we started 11 and a half hours ago, so it's a good time actually.
00:39:33Really?
00:39:34Nope.
00:39:35This is when you rely on your World Cup fitness.
00:39:40Nice.
00:39:43Come on.
00:39:45Come on.
00:39:46Yeah.
00:39:46Yeah.
00:39:50Pretty sure you can just climb one more pitch.
00:39:54Pretty sure there's like five more pitches.
00:40:04Good.
00:40:12Good.
00:40:13Good.
00:40:14I'm falling.
00:40:14No, no.
00:40:15You're okay.
00:40:15Come on.
00:40:16Come on.
00:40:16No.
00:40:17It's too much.
00:40:17Stay with it.
00:40:19It just fucked everything up and like...
00:40:23That's alright.
00:40:24Oh my God.
00:40:25It just like...
00:40:26It's like shit.
00:40:31Really good.
00:40:32Yeah, really good.
00:40:40Ellen.
00:40:42Ellen.
00:40:43Come on.
00:40:44There you are.
00:40:46Oh fuck.
00:40:47I don't have it you guys.
00:40:48I don't have it.
00:40:51I'm just too tired.
00:40:54I'm giving you to everything I have.
00:40:56I just...
00:40:59I just couldn't do it.
00:41:00I couldn't keep climbing.
00:41:03I'm, like, super bummed that it's, like, everything I could possibly do.
00:41:09I failed on the last hard pitch.
00:41:13Pretty heartbroken.
00:41:28I think you have to try things that you're afraid of,
00:41:31that you might suck at,
00:41:34that you're going to most likely fail at in order to actually really
00:41:39get to know yourself and know what you're capable of.
00:41:49When I was trying to figure out how to make a team to go on this seven week,
00:41:56totally unknown, jungle bashing,
00:41:59crazy, alpine, Myanmar expedition,
00:42:02I wanted Emily to go.
00:42:04Like, I wanted her to go more than anyone.
00:42:08Like, I wouldn't go if Emily didn't go.
00:42:11This is, like, an anti-Everest trip.
00:42:18Think of Everest from the minute you get off the plane to the summit of Everest.
00:42:22Just every step of the way is mapped out.
00:42:25Pakakoborazi was exactly the opposite.
00:42:29Wanting her on the team was met with a lot of resistance,
00:42:33but I put my foot down and she was stoked to do it.
00:42:45It was a month before we even got to base camp.
00:42:49We had to cut our gear by two-thirds,
00:42:53ran out of food.
00:43:04A lot of the things that I did today, I've never done before.
00:43:22It's scary, the heavy pack.
00:43:24I feel it off that one's a little.
00:43:26Good job, ma'am.
00:43:31Way more rad,
00:43:34way more gnarly than Everest.
00:43:38My favorite day on that whole climb was
00:43:41Emily and I were stuck on this ridge for 48 hours.
00:43:49Winds blowing 60 miles an hour nonstop.
00:43:53And at one point, Emily looks at me and she's like,
00:43:56what do you think?
00:43:57Do you think we're going to be okay?
00:43:58I looked at her and I was like, I don't, I don't know.
00:44:01I hope so.
00:44:03And she was like, all right, cool, okay.
00:44:10And five minutes later, we're laughing and like doing what we can to like stay alive.
00:44:19Emily and I have talked a lot about how crazy it was and how strung out we were
00:44:23and how close to just like laying down on the trail and giving up we were.
00:44:28And we just didn't.
00:44:31She was everything I expected her to be on that trip.
00:44:35She was gritty.
00:44:36She was funny.
00:44:37She helped me when I was low.
00:44:39She tackled massive, scary things.
00:44:583.30 in the morning, November 20-something.
00:45:09Dragged everyone into helping me climb El Cap in a day.
00:45:16Massive snowstorm is approaching, like tomorrow, so.
00:45:20Day after tomorrow.
00:45:21Last day of the season basically.
00:45:23Dragging everyone up here to support me one more time.
00:45:26One more character building day on the mountain.
00:45:28One more character building day on the mountain.
00:45:31It's like 4 a.m.
00:45:34It's way colder than it was last time, so that's good.
00:45:36If you were really pro, you'd be racked onto the harness already.
00:45:38Pack your harness that way.
00:45:41Oh yeah, I didn't do that.
00:45:43You guys heated it last time.
00:45:45Ten more feet today, okay?
00:45:47Yeah, exactly.
00:45:48Ten more feet today.
00:45:53Go Em, go.
00:45:54Here we go.
00:45:55You're gonna crush it.
00:45:57Thanks, Sonny.
00:46:04Hi, Sam.
00:46:06Hi.
00:46:07You're crushing.
00:46:09It's such a still day up on the captain.
00:46:30Creaky old grandpa, I'll sit down and tighten the shoes up.
00:46:36Nice, Em.
00:46:38Oh my God.
00:46:44Are you okay, Em?
00:46:46Emily, are you okay?
00:46:49Em?
00:46:50Holy shit.
00:46:52Oh my God, Em.
00:46:56Should I lower you to the ledge?
00:46:57Emily, you're okay.
00:46:58Maya!
00:47:00Maya!
00:47:01Maya!
00:47:02Maya!
00:47:03Em?
00:47:05Talk to us.
00:47:07Talk to us, Em.
00:47:08Are you okay?
00:47:09Are you right side up?
00:47:11Maya!
00:47:12Maya!
00:47:13She's not right side up.
00:47:14Maya!
00:47:16Dia!
00:47:16Offer me your number is 4-0-4-6.
00:47:18Correct.
00:47:19I'm gonna be on hold while I try to get her right here, okay?
00:47:22Okay, thank you.
00:47:30Hang in there, Em.
00:47:36You know, I can tell that it's terrible.
00:47:37It's all terrible.
00:47:38Like, you can tell it's a giant fall.
00:47:41The only thing I was thinking about was whether or not she'll walk again.
00:48:20I've been playing this pitch so many times.
00:48:22I know it's slippery, but I've never fallen.
00:48:25I know my feet are cold, but I need to be confident.
00:48:30I wasn't scared.
00:48:32I just...
00:48:35Now it's scary, though, to think about.
00:48:49Oh, I'm sorry, guys.
00:49:01Yeah, still have some stuff to learn, I guess.
00:49:07Yeah, still have some stuff to learn.
00:49:33world-class climber emily harrington trying to make history falling from yosemite's el capitan
00:49:38rescued by one of the most famous climbers in the world falls are apparel of the sport
00:49:43no matter your skill level thank goodness she was with people like alex hunnell the climber at the
00:49:48center of that oscar-winning documentary free solo i was blind so i'm holding the rope but then
00:49:53when she fell so much rope fell into the system like so much rope pooled at my feet basically that
00:49:58i wound up actually grabbing the rope with my hands in an effort to catch her sooner i don't know
00:50:03if
00:50:03you guys had a chance to watch free solo oh he was i mean it's amazing what they do and
00:50:08boy you
00:50:09gotta have some nerves of steel yes you do hope you have the full recovery
00:50:15how are you feeling about it all shitty shitty about it like sad yeah
00:50:24everyone is interested in lcap and everyone is interested in the fact that i was climbing
00:50:29with alex honnold so they want to write a story about the damsel in distress who was rescued by
00:50:34the free solo star oh adrenaline junkies like risking their lives falling off of sheer cliffs and gets
00:50:43rescued like it's just stupid and not true and it's misunderstood i had a bad fall climbing because
00:50:50rock climbing is inherently dangerous but and alex did what exactly what any good partner would do
00:50:57yeah and that's the end of the story that goes to me i don't know we were choosing to
00:51:05take a certain level of risk that day it was a hundred percent not his fault what happened
00:51:43i was afraid of not being good enough and now the entire world thinks that as well
00:51:57she is no alex honnold do this without the security of a rope and then you can pretend to have
00:52:02accomplished something woman go back to kitchen please let man's doing this stuff she's too fat
00:52:27i'm bruised and have a rope burn on my neck and a pretty intense concussion
00:52:33i'm slowly recovering but mentally i'm struggling
00:52:41i just spiral into the negativity of oh i'm never gonna be able to get anywhere with this
00:52:50lots of doubt and lots of kind of like questioning of like why am i doing this why am i
00:52:54even like
00:52:55trying so hard and just feel like giving up there's just this really big fear and it's all circling
00:53:02around like the whole kid thing and the the clock is ticking idea and i really do want to have
00:53:10fun and
00:53:11enjoy climbing i do i just don't know how right now yeah it's hard to trust myself i guess
00:53:34it's passover happy passover guys hogsomeach john hogsomeach to you and uh we can tell that it's
00:53:41passover because we are in our houses hiding from a plague and because in our recent breakfast
00:53:46podcast very loud podcast very loud blood on your door will stop coronavirus
00:53:54we are one day short of a month since we've been home april 12th
00:54:00easter sunday and
00:54:04it's sunday but it doesn't really matter that it's sunday
00:54:08every day is pretty much very similar
00:54:15adrian and i have been physically together for longer than we have ever been
00:54:21it's felt like this period of deep connection
00:54:25what's your favorite color this is like a rapid fire question oh really i actually
00:54:33what's your favorite color gray gray
00:54:38that's a terrible favorite color my favorite color is green
00:54:44really yeah i never knew that well you learn something new every day don't you
00:54:48i don't think i've ever bought you anything green better start now
00:54:55we've discussed starting a family in more serious ways but i really have to finish this project
00:55:02before i can start thinking about taking that stuff i don't want to take eight years to free
00:55:07climb a little cap in a day then i'll be 40 and then you know it might be too late
00:55:25if i let something like fear something like an accident stop me from doing something
00:55:32then i'll never go back i'll never try something hard again this is no longer just a way to prove
00:55:39myself it's a way for me to gain back trust and confidence in myself
00:55:48i need to go back
00:55:58i've been really gentle with myself just accepting that i'm probably going to be a little more
00:56:04conservative this year i think i need to talk to alex about adjusting my method and just be like dude
00:56:09i don't want to like go so fast i want to be able to stop and take a breather and
00:56:14i want to be able to
00:56:15place more gear and feel way more safe
00:56:34so it begins emily's yosemite season
00:56:453 a.m i'm out of bed in coffee
00:56:50em's waiting for a coffee the life of a superstar
00:56:57how's it feeling it's okay where i fell last year you fell last year yeah
00:57:05i'm back in yosemite for the first time since the accident and adrian's been helping me train
00:57:10on the hard pitches and build back that trust down to the move pitch
00:57:25it was no like massive screaming whippers out of the move today
00:57:30you just hit it every time you're stronger big support today thank you
00:57:40physically i feel better than i have probably ever in my life
00:57:45i'm trying to figure out the best tactics for climbing the monster
00:57:50and um so i'm gonna try putting on my climbing shoe and then i'm gonna try putting on
00:57:55a size 42 tc pro over top of it to make my foot bigger
00:58:08i'm so excited about this
00:58:15and so what time are we thinking about starting let's say starting the monster at
00:58:186 a.m which means starting climbing at 1 a.m
00:58:22that's what i was hoping to do tonight you know i know get some you signed up for it yeah
00:58:27no no i'm
00:58:28into it we got knee pads and duct tape and elbow pads at this point you're going to get to
00:58:32the top
00:58:33more fresh than when you left the ground i think it'd be tough to make this more comfortable yeah
00:58:38that's the whole point i think it's yeah exactly we're ready for the the long haul right now i'm
00:58:43planning to have two partners it is really valuable to have alex as a partner because he is so fast
00:58:50but up higher when the climbing gets slower i really like having adrian there he's really good
00:58:57emotional support for me
00:59:05go get her go get her slowly and then like see how i feel when i get to it yeah
00:59:11cool it's the same time
00:59:13tomorrow as today basically i do feel ready i don't think i'm gonna be any more ready than i'm ready
00:59:17than i am right now if i achieve this i'll never not be a climber but i can like move
00:59:25on from being
00:59:25like solely focused on climbing like i can move forward with my life i could have a family like i
00:59:30do all these things i've wanted to do that might not require so much like pinpointed focus it's that
01:00:07meaningful
01:00:17At some point in here, I'm going to have to tie my shoes and put them on, but I'm sort
01:00:20of like, oh, I've got flashbacks of the last year.
01:00:23PTSD.
01:00:23Exactly.
01:00:25Oh my god, jeez.
01:00:41I'm going to run around to the top and hopefully get to meet them like two-thirds of the way
01:00:45up.
01:00:48All right, Sam.
01:00:49Really smooth.
01:00:53Hey, Sam.
01:00:54She's done the free blast.
01:00:57Yes.
01:00:58Great job, Deidre.
01:01:00How do you feel?
01:01:01Okay.
01:01:12I heard a call from the film team.
01:01:15Your dad might be starting the monster, but you should be right on track.
01:01:27It's so funny that you're wearing two pairs of shoes.
01:01:30I'm on track, please.
01:01:50Yes, I'm so excited.
01:01:50It's so cute.
01:01:50I'm so cute.
01:01:50I'm so cute.
01:01:51And then you're just so cute and you're from her way,
01:01:56I'm so cute.
01:02:04Oh, so glad to have that bitch over with.
01:02:08I'm taking off all of my shoes, all four pairs of them that I was wearing.
01:02:15I was wearing Alex's shoes over my shoes so I could climb the monster easier and faster
01:02:20and it works.
01:02:25I will say it's not often that I encounter a completely new rock climbing technique on
01:02:29a big wall.
01:02:29This is one of those times you've styled the hard stuff.
01:02:34Next M is going to lead us to the summit of the mighty El Capitan.
01:02:38That's what's happening next.
01:02:47Nice.
01:02:51Good, really nice.
01:03:01Nice and relaxed.
01:03:09Trust the beat.
01:03:12Perfect.
01:03:13That's the one.
01:03:15Perfect.
01:03:17Really good.
01:03:30Nice work.
01:03:31I'm not coming down off the mountain until I set this route.
01:03:36I'm never climbing that pitch again.
01:03:42Nice and really smooth.
01:03:43Nice.
01:03:43Nice.
01:03:50Nice.
01:03:54Nice.
01:04:12You look really fit right now.
01:04:16Come on.
01:04:19So strong.
01:04:22Come on.
01:04:30Nice.
01:04:32Come on.
01:04:37That's it.
01:04:38Come on.
01:04:39Really good.
01:04:53I did dig really deep for that one.
01:04:57I set the move pitch on my first try.
01:05:00Everything's going well.
01:05:03I'm waiting for the other shoe to drop.
01:05:05the other shoe to drop.
01:05:33I'm going to go.
01:05:34I'm going to go.
01:05:35I'm going to go.
01:05:35I'm going to go.
01:05:36I feel good.
01:05:37He was infinitely better than last time.
01:05:41I'm going to go.
01:06:06You got it, man.
01:06:08You got it.
01:06:10You got it.
01:06:11You got it.
01:06:13You got it.
01:06:15You got it.
01:06:15No.
01:06:16No.
01:06:19No.
01:06:22No.
01:06:24It's bleeding.
01:06:25Yeah, I see.
01:06:26Just a little.
01:06:28I'm going to bring you down.
01:06:29Yeah.
01:06:30A little.
01:06:32You're okay.
01:06:33All right.
01:06:38Fuck.
01:06:43See how bad it is.
01:06:52Like, I just don't know anymore about this whole hole.
01:06:56It just feels so too hard for me.
01:07:00I mean, this stupid shit just keeps happening.
01:07:03No.
01:07:04You're getting better and better every time.
01:07:06I know, I know, I know, I know, I know.
01:07:14I just don't feel good enough right now.
01:07:18I wanted it so badly and maybe I just wanted it too much.
01:07:30This worked really hard.
01:07:32I know.
01:07:33You're not done, Em.
01:07:36You're not done.
01:07:40So stupid.
01:07:41Why did that have to happen?
01:07:43I didn't do anything wrong.
01:07:45I wasn't running it out.
01:07:46I wasn't doing anything wrong.
01:07:49I'm just scared now.
01:07:51You just bumped your head.
01:07:53You're fine.
01:07:55I didn't break anything.
01:07:57I know.
01:07:58I don't know.
01:08:00I hope they'll do it.
01:08:02You're going to do it today.
01:08:10It's not hopeless.
01:08:12I promise.
01:08:13Okay.
01:08:14I'm trying.
01:08:15I keep trying.
01:08:16I don't have much confidence anymore.
01:08:20I think you've got more try on you.
01:08:23You know I'd tell you if I didn't.
01:08:25I don't.
01:08:26I don't.
01:08:26I think you can do it.
01:08:28You can try.
01:08:55I think you to deal with you.
01:08:56I don't have much ice cream.
01:08:57I know.
01:09:06I don't know if.
01:09:07We need my laam Noam.
01:09:07I threw everything in water.
01:09:08I don't have much ice cream as well.
01:09:09You need more ice cream.
01:09:09You should get fucking ice cream.
01:09:14You will walk through steady ice cream.
01:09:17I'm over there.
01:09:24Super good.
01:09:26Super good.
01:09:28Come on.
01:09:29Yeah.
01:09:30Come on.
01:09:31Get on that part.
01:09:56Come on.
01:10:26Woo!
01:10:35Thanks.
01:10:38No matter what happens, I'm proud of myself.
01:10:42I'm really proud of myself.
01:10:44Look at the sunset.
01:10:50Oh.
01:10:54Gotta keep climbing.
01:10:57Trying to rest before the last hard pitch.
01:11:00The A5.
01:11:01Yeah.
01:11:02The sight of...
01:11:05Last time's failure.
01:11:06Last year's failure.
01:11:07Mm-hmm.
01:11:08Yeah.
01:11:09Pretty nervous for it.
01:11:12And we're out of water.
01:11:14Yeah, we are out of water.
01:11:15That sucks.
01:11:15Poor mountain guy planning.
01:11:22You look great.
01:11:23So proud of you.
01:11:24Have fun on this.
01:11:26This is the pitch you earn.
01:11:35Come on.
01:11:41Come on.
01:11:44Come on.
01:11:46Come on.
01:11:49Nice.
01:11:51Come on.
01:12:02Come on.
01:12:04Come on.
01:12:14Come on.
01:12:16Come on.
01:12:18Come on.
01:12:20Remember a gang?
01:12:28You know what to do.
01:12:52Come on.
01:13:04No!
01:13:09Oh, my God!
01:13:12Woo-hoo!
01:13:20Oh, my God!
01:13:23Woo-hoo!
01:13:25Holy shit, Evelyn!
01:13:34I can't believe I did that.
01:13:36Okay, I've got to keep it together.
01:13:38We've got five more pitches.
01:13:47I've always dreamed of being able to do this.
01:13:49And now it's happening, and it's just crazy how it's happening.
01:13:54It was so close so many times to falling just now.
01:13:57So close.
01:13:59But I just didn't fucking let go.
01:14:09Oh, my God, I'm weak.
01:14:24Oh, my God.
01:14:27Oh!
01:14:40Fuck you!
01:15:02I'm really, really happy and exhausted and my head kind of hurts and I'm thirsty and everything
01:15:10is perfect.
01:15:17I love you so much.
01:15:22You did.
01:15:27I'm so proud of you, you worked so hard and you believed.
01:15:35You did.
01:15:35Yeah.
01:15:3721-12.
01:15:3921-13.
01:15:4021-14.
01:15:4121-15.
01:15:5021-15.
01:15:5521-15.
01:15:5721-15.
01:15:5921-15.
01:15:5922-15.
01:15:5922-15.
01:16:0221-15.
01:16:05You heard that.
01:16:08Mm-hmm.
01:16:30Can I go say hi to everyone?
01:16:31Nice work.
01:16:32Thanks.
01:16:33Well done.
01:16:34You look worse.
01:16:37Actually, you look pretty good.
01:16:38He's went downhill a little bit after he left.
01:16:41You have to make it after it, dude.
01:16:43Why'd you leave us?
01:16:46That is so cute.
01:16:50Dude.
01:16:51Come around.
01:16:52Oh my gosh.
01:16:55That is so cute.
01:17:11Oh!
01:17:12Oh!
01:17:14Oh!
01:17:14Oh!
01:17:14Oh!
01:17:16Oh!
01:17:18Oh!
01:17:43I can still hear her
01:17:45voice in my head and I think about whenever something's hard or something
01:17:55comes up that's feels tricky or feels complicated especially as like a woman
01:18:02and a mother I try to think about how Hillary would handle it
01:18:19climbing is dangerous and it entails a level of risk but climbing has given me
01:18:25so much and I'm just not willing to give it up
01:18:33I'm excited for what's next
01:18:57I know the rise and I know the fall
01:19:01cause the voice inside knows me best of all
01:19:08if I can't run I'll walk or crawl
01:19:14I'll restart, restart
01:19:18I'll give my all
01:19:22to find my place
01:19:27my place
01:19:29on the wall
01:19:44I'll follow the path into the sky
01:19:48to kiss the heavens before I die
01:19:58amidst the clouds
01:20:00the world seems small
01:20:03his tired heart
01:20:07still wants it all
01:20:10I'll find my place
01:20:14my place on the wall
01:20:17I'll find my place
01:20:22my place
01:20:23my place
01:20:24on the wall
01:20:27I'll give the world
01:20:29I'll give the world
01:20:32I'll give the world
01:20:36I'll give the world
01:20:39I'll give the world
01:20:41I'll give the world
01:20:42I'll give the world
01:20:42I'll give the world
01:20:44I'll give the world
01:20:45I'll give the world
01:20:46I'll give the world
01:20:46I'll give the world
01:20:47I'll give the world
01:20:48I'll give the world
01:20:50I'll give the world
01:20:50I'll give the world
01:20:51I'll give the world
01:20:51I'll give the world
01:20:51I'll give the world
01:20:52I found my place, my place on the wall
01:20:59I found my place, my place on the wall
01:21:49I found my place, my place on the wall
01:21:51I found my place, my place on the wall
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