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00:05my mom called me a liar from the day i was born not because i actually lied but because of
00:10this
00:10thing around my neck the verity choker mom was luna of silver moon pack and she believed one
00:15thing above all lying was the mark of a weak wolf we were her daughters future alpha heirs
00:21weakness was not an option so when my twin sister emma and i were born mom clasped these chokers
00:27around our throats which had witch magic to detect lies green light means truth red light means you
00:33were lying emma's choker always green she could shred mom's ceremonial cloak and blame the cat
00:39and gem would glow a steady green not me green light believed me mom i'm hungry and flash red
00:49light the choker choked tight i shifted on instinct a small white wolf pawing desperately at the gem
00:55around my neck claws scraping against it unable to get it off i'm not lying not lying please but mom's
01:03eyes had already gone cold instant punishment mom's punishment wasn't gentle no food locked in my room
01:09no contact with anyone in the pack the truth necklace doesn't lie stella starve now study later
01:16i'm doing this for your own good after 10 years of this i started believing it too maybe i really
01:22was
01:22born wrong new year's eve everything changed mom was getting ready to take emma to the pack's bonfire
01:28celebration and that's when the pain hit like a knife twisting in my gut i collapsed on the floor
01:34my skeletal frame curling into itself mom please the choker flashed red and choked tight she looked down at
01:43me disgusted in her eyes in your dream stella faking an illness to ruin our night she grabbed emma's hand
01:51and headed for the door i wanted to howl but my wolf was too weak to answer i shifted anyway
01:57forced it
01:58a small white wolf trembling on the floor ribs heaving maybe in this form the pain would hurt less
02:04it didn't i couldn't even hold the shift i slipped back into myself without meaning to
02:09sorry mom i won't lie anymore but the pain got worse way worse the door handle turned for one
02:16second i thought mom's coming back she came back for me hurry up the bonfire is starting emma's waiting
02:23mom i reached out with a shaking hand please something's really wrong i feel like i'm dying
02:30she glanced at my neck the gem was flashing red over and over she crouched down grabbed my chin
02:37stella how long are you gonna keep this up can't you just be honest and stay here and think about
02:43what you've done dad appeared in the doorway honey should we at least leave her some food
02:50food she has a stash of snacks she bought with stolen money she won't starve lock the door
02:57when that gem turns green we'll talk but but what it's because you spoil her that she turned out this
03:05way look at emma her gem has always been green stella is a liar an alpha heiress who can't tell
03:13the
03:13truth she needs discipline but my cabinet was empty emma stole that money emma ate those snacks emma just
03:21stood there with her glowing green gem saying not me and mom believed her i tried to defend myself
03:28it wasn't me red light the choker choked tight i tried to shift nothing happened deep inside my wolf
03:37barely stirred mom locked me up for three days with nothing but water and stale bread mom turned to
03:43leave emma peeked through the door made a face at me bye sis we're gonna see the bonfire her gem
03:50glowed a
03:51steady green so pretty the door locked the house went silent i called my wolf nothing came back not
03:59even a whisper just me alone the pain was unbearable but i kept thinking mom's right the gem doesn't lie
04:09it's red so i must be lying i'm not in pain i'm not in pain i'm not in pain i
04:19kept repeating it like a
04:20prayer eventually i almost believed it the pain dulled or maybe i was just going numb i crawled to
04:28my desk i had to write that was the rule if the gem glowed red i had to pen a
04:35thousand word apology
04:36or mom would never let me out i am a liar write it down and maybe mom would forgive me
04:44maybe she'd even
04:45let me out i opened my journal pages and pages of apologies i'd written over the years sorry i lied
04:53i won't do it again but this time i wanted to write the truth my vision blurred my hand shook
05:01as i wrote
05:01mom i really love you it really hurts why won't you believe me please believe me just once the moment
05:12i finished the last word the pain vanished just gone i felt light weightless i looked down i was
05:21floating and there slumped over the desk was my body motionless the gem still flashing red around a dead
05:29girl's neck oh i'm dead and then she came out my wolf stepping out of my body like she'd been
05:38waiting
05:38all along small skinny barely holding together she looked up at me and once soft and low in the pack's
05:48old stories they say when a wolf dies young her spirit doesn't cross over alone her wolf walks beside
05:55her until they find the door together i knelt down she pressed her nose into my ghostly palm
06:02finally we were together now but i never learned how to be honest sorry mom i heard laughter mom dad
06:11emma coming through the front door tonight's bonfire was beautiful the best one yet just like our emma
06:20perfect in every way i'd never heard her sound like that when she talked about me i floated toward
06:26them my wolf patting silently at my side moving on instinct i wanted to help them take off their
06:32cloaks that's what i always did mom my arms passed right through her body like wind is it so cold
06:40here
06:40is the hearthi out i stood there staring at my transparent hands my wolf pressed against my leg
06:47and looked up at me with sad eyes right dead wolves couldn't hug the living shall we go and see
06:53stella
06:54she hasn't eaten yet still the good cop i looked at mom hopefully if she found me dead would she
07:01be
07:01sad would she regret it she won't starve she is a werewolf not a human pup this whole fake sick
07:10for
07:11attention thing is out of control i laughed bitterly mom wasn't wrong werewolves heal but i hadn't been able
07:18to in a long time last winter the choker left bruises that stayed for days that hadn't happened
07:25before i reached for my wolf she was still there but the warmth never came she was too hungry just
07:31like me mom never noticed she only ever looked at my neck for one thing the gem and whether it
07:40was red
07:40or green mom pushed open my door didn't even turn on the light just for a second her eyes flashed
07:47gold
07:47her wolf might have known mom didn't listen in the dim glow from the hallway she saw me slumped over
07:53my desk i looked like a skeleton hadn't moved still putting on an act you're 10 years old not five
08:02grow up mom i'm not playing i'm dead look at me touch me i'm freezing she couldn't hear me she
08:12only
08:12believed what she wanted to see emma squeezed past her held up her choker with that smug little grin
08:18look my gem is green stella's is still red she's lying even in her sleep that's my good girl
08:25ignore the liar let her stay there maybe she'll learn how to be honest should we at least put her
08:33in bed it's freezing put her in bed look at that red gem still lying come on leave her we
08:41have to visit
08:41grandma tomorrow the door locked again i floated next to my corpse my wolf curled silently at my feet
08:49staring at that single point of red light in the darkness mom if you just stepped closer if you just
08:56touched my hand you'd know i was ice cold but you didn't you believed the choker not the daughter you
09:02carried for nine months that night a rat crawled out of my empty cabinet i used to scream whenever i
09:08saw
09:09rats but now i just floated by the ceiling watching it scurry across my dead body the rat bit into
09:15my
09:16toe i didn't feel anything my wolf charged at it anyway and passed right through landing on the other
09:22side she turned back to look at me confused lost i pulled her close and buried my face in the
09:29fur of her
09:30back it's okay you can't feel it anymore it'll be over soon she let out one low growl then went
09:38still
09:38against me finally no more pain for either of us the next morning sunlight streamed through the
09:45window no warmth reached my body in the kitchen i could hear mom making breakfast the smell of roasted
09:52meat crept under my door my favorite but mom always said liars don't deserve meat so i only ever got
09:59steamed vegetables she was clanging the pots extra loud on purpose trying to tempt me out trying to make me
10:06give in and apologize for things i never did in the old days i might have caved i might have
10:12confessed
10:12to anything for one bite of roasted meat but i don't need food anymore stella still hasn't come out yet
10:19dad asked reading the pack notices she is so stubborn she can eat or not i don't care
10:28emma walked to my door and made a big show of sniffing the air then she screamed dramatically
10:35mom stella's room smells like poop did she poop in there i floated by the door watching my sister
10:42with a bitter smile my wolf sat beside me ears flat eyes low the hearth was burning hot after just
10:51one
10:51night my body started to rot mom stormed over pounding on the door
10:56stella who does that the toilet is right there did you shit on the floor to spite me i remembered
11:04being
11:04six i had food poisoning couldn't make it to the toilet in time mom didn't help me clean up she
11:12made
11:12me stand outside pointed at me and told the neighbors look at this she's such a mess she can't even
11:19use the
11:20toilet herself now she thought i was dirty again leave her let her sit in her own stink
11:26but dad stood up frowning that smells really bad i should check could it be a dead rat or something
11:33my heart if i still had one leapt dad please open the door i'm right here just turn the handle
11:42and
11:42you'll see i'm not moving i waved my transparent arms frantically my wolf ran straight to my bedroom
11:49door willing dad to open it dad's hand touched the door handle his hand froze someone was pounding
11:56at the front door a pack elder urgent business dad's face went pale he grabbed his cloak the border
12:02there's an emergency he was already out the door i froze so close one second away if that knock had
12:10come one second later i would have been found maybe then i wouldn't have rotted alone that afternoon mom
12:16took emma to the pack market the house was empty except for my corpse when they came back that
12:20evening loaded down with food and gifts from the market the smell had gotten worse mom gagged the
12:26second she walked in stella are you trying to turn this place into a den of inequity she didn't even
12:32open my door just grabbed cloth strips and sealed the gap at the bottom if you want to stay in
12:37there
12:37and make disgusting stew zoos don't stink up my house she patted her hands together satisfied then
12:43went to prepare dinner i stared at that sealed door my wolf pressed her nose against it and whimpered
12:48once so that's it i'm worth less than a venison dinner by day three even the cloth strips couldn't
12:53contain the smell mom was arranging fresh wildflowers trying to cover it up but the stench of death is
12:59unmistakable sweet rotten oily she cut a rose stem too hard a thorn pierced her hand she snapped
13:06in her mind i was doing this on purpose not bathing poop on the floor hiding dead rats in my
13:13room
13:13all to piss her off all to defy her authority as luna stella she grabbed a rolling pin from the
13:19kitchen stormed toward my room i'm done with you you disgusting little brat time you learned what
13:26real pain feels like i floated in front of her waving my arms desperately don't come in mom
13:34please please even though she never loved me i didn't want her to see me like that but she walked
13:40right through me ripped the cloth strips off jammed the spare key into the lock the door flew open the
13:46smell hit her like a wall she stumbled back retching stella what are you doing she saw me still slumped
13:53over
13:53the desk back turned not moving to her this was the ultimate rebellion i'm talking to you she marched
14:01over raised the rolling pin but stopped she wanted to see my face first wanted to see my get up
14:08she
14:09grabbed the back of my shirt grabbed my skin the moment she touched me she froze through the thin fabric
14:14her hand didn't feel warm flesh she felt cold hard dead meat the kind of cold that seeps into your
14:21bones
14:21what but momentum carried her forward she yanked crash my body stiff as a board toppled backward
14:29taking the chair with it and there was my face blue black eyes bulging features twisted in agony
14:35dried foam and blood crusted around my mouth around my blackened neck the verity choker hung lifeless
14:41the gem dark no red no green just silence my journal slid off the desk fell open at mom's feet
14:49the last page stared up at her mom my stomach really hurts the choker is wrong i'm not lying please
14:56don't punish me mom screamed not a wolf's howl a raw guttural shriek that tore through her throat
15:03she stumbled backward slammed into the bookshelf a clay pot shattered but she didn't seem to feel the pain
15:10she just stared at me eyes wide unblinking no no no no this is not real stella get up stella
15:20get up get up i'm not mad anymore stop scaring me her hand reached out trembling to touch my arm
15:29the second her skin made contact with my corpse she recoiled like she'd been burned
15:35that cold was too real lisa from next door heard the screaming and went straight to the pack healer
15:41when she saw what was in my room she collapsed in the gate within the hour heavy boots on the
15:47floorboards the pack healer and a handful of pack warriors crowding the entrance mom sat on the floor
15:53a warrior's hand on her shoulder she's speaking it she's always lying
16:00it doesn't lie i'm just teaching her no one responded they all looked at her like she was
16:06a monster the pack healer crouched next to my body he muttered under his breath severe malnutrition
16:13organ failure this puppy has been starved for at least a month he carefully tried to remove the verity
16:20choker but it had fused years of tightening had pressed the leather deep into the skin of my neck
16:26damn it he had to use tools to pry it off even dead my soul flinched my wolf lifted her
16:33head and
16:36long raw desperate the kind of howl that should have shaken the walls no one heard it no one flinched
16:44we were already dead a warrior picked up my journal started reading his face went from neutral to
16:50horrified mom's eyes locked onto that book that's her confession she admits she lied look she wrote it
16:58herself the warrior pushed her back wrapped the journal in cloth and took it we'll report it to the council
17:07that's when dad got home he saw the pack healer and the pack warriors crowding the doorway
17:13saw the body wrap being carried out saw the long cord that sealed away my entire life his legs gave
17:21out he collapsed on the doorstep emma stood nearby sobbing in confusion she pointed at the discolored
17:29verity choker on the table why does stella have a black collar and i have a green one see she
17:36held up
17:36her neck the gem blinked its steady green it was grotesque the council elders arrived before dawn mom
17:44straightened when she saw them even now even with my body three days cold and rotting her luna instincts
17:51kicked in she lifted her chin squared her shoulders it didn't work today they started questioning mom in
17:59the living room mom grabbed the verity choker off the table like it was a lifeline test it that choker
18:05proved she was lying red gem means lie i never abused her the choker told me i was just educating
18:16her
18:17the council elders looked at her like she'd lost her mind the pup shows signs of extreme malnutrition
18:24months of starvation aphelion multiple old injuries consistent with prolonged
18:30that's just discipline that's teaching her to be honest then she did something insane you don't
18:38believe me fine i'll wear it watch it'll be green the leather pressed against her skin cold sticky that
18:51was my blood she took a deep breath tried to calm herself she needed to prove she was innocent needed
18:58to
18:58prove her way of raising an alpha heir was right she held up the gem eyes wild listen i'm rachel
19:06i'm
19:07stella's mother this is the truth the absolute truth the gem flashed red mom's confident expression shattered
19:17i said truth i am rachel i never abused her i did it for her own good
19:27i love her and suddenly she remembered me 10 years old gasping as the choker tightened around my throat
19:36biting my lip so i wouldn't make a sound is this what it felt like why is it red i
19:44am telling the truth
19:45turn green you're broken you're setting me up but the gem kept flashing like it was mocking her
19:51you're a liar you're a liar you're a liar enough this is just a bloodstone i've seen it before it
20:02changes
20:02color with body heat fear pain anything that makes your heart race temperature rises it burns red that's
20:11all it does no witch magic never was think about your daughter ruptured appendix organ failure the pain
20:21must have been unbearable she was terrified and what did you see a red gem so you punished her more
20:29which made her more scared which made her temperature rise which made the stone turn redder
20:39you are luna you are supposed to protect every wolf in this pack you couldn't even protect your own
20:47daughter you ignored her cries for help you starved your daughter to death mom's world collapsed she sat
20:55there staring at the flashing gem on her own net and finally understood for 10 years every red light
21:02wasn't because i was lying it was because i was scared scared of her anger scared of being misunderstood
21:11scared of eating food that made me sick i was in pain pain that made my heart race and cold
21:18sweat pour
21:18down my face i was desperate desperate for a hug for her to hold me the way she held emma
21:25every signal
21:26from my frightened heart she had interpreted as proof of my lies no get it off
21:38she tried to shift fur rippling across her skin bones cracking but the leather cinched harder
21:45around her throat the moment her neck began to change she snapped back into human form gasping
21:52i can't get it off stella take it back i'm sorry it's all my fault this little bit of choking
22:00and she was
22:01already breaking mom i suffered for 10 years the council elders needed evidence for judgment so
22:10they opened my journal in front of my parents february 14th sunny mom put celery on my plate i'm allergic
22:19my throat swells i can't breathe i said i can't eat it but because i was scared of making her
22:25angry
22:26my body ran hot the gem flashed red the choker tightened mom said i was picky lying made me eat
22:35the whole plate that night i threw up blood my throat felt like it was on fire i shifted to
22:42ease my pain
22:43mom saw it and said i'd snuck berry juice that i was faking the choker tightened for 10 more minutes
22:51mom's hand flew to her mouth she was shaking violently she remembered that she really did
22:59think it was berry juice she didn't even look closely just turned away to read emma a bedtime story
23:06that was blood from a swollen torn throat june 1st pups day emma shredded mom's ceremonial cloak
23:15emma's heart is always calm her gem stays green i tried to explain but i was scared of being hit
23:22my body ran hot red gem choker tightened for 10 minutes it hurts so bad but i didn't cry because
23:32crying makes your body run hotter and mom thinks that means you're not sorry so i held my breath
23:39pretended it didn't hurt mom said see she doesn't even blink she's definitely faking it
23:47dad couldn't take it anymore this man who had always put the pack before his own family
23:51chose duty over his daughter for 10 years you monster what did you do that was your daughter
24:01you treated her like a stray blood at the corner of her mouth not my fault not my fault it's
24:08her
24:08it's emma emma's jam was always green emma was a good one if it wasn't for that green light
24:15making me trust her i wouldn't have believed the red light so much this is emma's fault that little
24:21princess everyone who protected one of the council elders walked over gently removed the green
24:27verity choker from her neck took out a blade pried the gem loose right there it rolled onto the table
24:35still glowing green steady unchanged the elder picked up the stone a glowstone that is all your
24:44younger daughter's choker was always going to shine green no matter what she said did or lied about it
24:52would never change your so called verity choker was a fraud that was her truth for 10 years that
25:01was the evidence she used to convict me a common glowstone that put me in hell while emma lived in
25:07paradise so i wasn't a liar i i laughed laughed until i cried turns out ghosts could cry too the
25:15elder
25:16turned to the last page of the journal his voice broke the handwriting was a mess clearly written while
25:22dying mom if i die will the choker stop glowing red or if it turns green will you hug me
25:29then i'm not
25:30lying i couldn't heal myself anymore my stomach hurts so much like knives next life please don't make me
25:39wear the choker please i just want to be a normal pup i want to eat mom's roasted meat mom
25:45stared at the
25:45broken glowstone on the table that truth magic she trusted without question a worthless stone because
25:52of that stone she spoiled emma for 10 years because of that cursed red light she tortured me for 10
25:59years
26:03mom started laughing her voice cracking worse than crying fake all fake
26:14i killed my most honest pup and i worshipped a liar she'd lost her mind for real this time my
26:23death became
26:24the talk of the entire pack lisa the neighbor who had sent for the pack healer told everyone what she'd
26:30seen every wolf knew by morning luna had starved her own daughter to death monster murderer she doesn't
26:40deserve to be luna stones flew at our door the word killer carved into the wall the council convened within
26:48the day the verdict was swift dad lost his alpha title no wolf would follow him now my grandfather
26:56the former alpha read out the judgment himself he didn't look at his son once dad walked out of the
27:02council hall and never looked back he took emma and left the pack that same night emma was a bad
27:09seed
27:09sure but she was still his blood before they left emma tried to take her green choker dad stomped on
27:17it
27:17why the hell would you want that piece of trash emma cried as he dragged her away mom got out
27:23of the
27:23dungeon the healer said she had lost her mind the council locked her in the home instead the one that
27:29still smelled like death her mental state deteriorated fast she refused to take off the red choker she
27:37would tighten it herself whenever the guilt got too heavy she said choking was the only thing that eased it
27:42it was her self-imposed punishment i floated in the darkness my wolf curled beside me watching her
27:49unravel day after day she'd talk to the empty corner where i used to stand stella i brought you
27:54some food no celery today it's all roast just how you like it but there was no food there was
28:03nothing
28:04just her hands cupped around air she'd pretend to set a plate down her hands shook the gem flashed red
28:11she was anxious guilty falling apart she smiled but her eyes were empty the gem is red mom is lying
28:21liars don't deserve food she pulled the choker tight with her own hands let it choke her her body
28:27convulsed against the cold floor it hurts so much is this how stella felt i'm sorry mom started
28:35reenacting my diary entries i couldn't eat celery because of my allergy so she forced herself to eat
28:43spoiled food until she vomited blood then swallowed it back down i was locked in isolation so she locked
28:51herself in my old room lights off and bowed to my portrait until her forehead bled over and over
28:59blood on the floor late at night she'd see the red glow of the bloodstone reflected on the wall
29:06to her it looked like my bloody eyes were watching she kept punishing herself the wounds healed slower and
29:13slower her wolf exhausted by months of self-torture slowly fell into a deep sleep mom didn't care
29:21she scrawled on the back of my journal i'm sorry i was wrong red means pain red means love please
29:29come back and say it hurts hurts one more time i'll save you i promise too bad i'm dead dead
29:36wolves
29:37can't cry for help eventually the new alpha intervened mom's self-harm had gone too far she'd
29:44nearly choked herself to death with her own hands he ordered her to move to a small hut at the
29:49far edge of
29:50the village locked from the outside someone posted to watch her day and night she was the strangest
29:56woman they'd ever seen nobody knew where she'd found it a frayed red cord tied around her own neck
30:03her homemade choker if anyone tried to remove it she'd snap at them teeth bared snarling wild-eyed
30:12don't touch me stella's watching she'll be angry if you take it every time the guard called her name
30:20and brought her food mom would grab the red cord and pull it tight against her own throat convulsing
30:26screaming red light red light don't punish punish me i'll eat i'll eat even if the food was scalding
30:36hot she'd gulp it down burning her throat wouldn't spit it out she was reenacting my final moments
30:43living my hell on repeat years later emma grew up without guidance and with a trail of shame behind her
30:50she drifted from pack to pack stealing to survive no one would take her in when she ran out of
30:57options
30:57she remembered mom was still alive she slipped back into the silverman pack under the cover of night
31:04not for love for money hey crazy lady dad's dead give me whatever you've been hiding emma stood there
31:13face hard eyes full of contempt she looked at mom's hollow broken form and spat on the floor it's
31:21disgusting give me what i want or i'll send you to meet your daughter for a moment mom's cloudy eyes
31:29cleared she looked at emma and suddenly remembered that choker that always green glowstone that decade of
31:38deception it's you you lie you're the green light that wasn't there you killed stella give her back to
31:47me give her back to me the last shred of maternal love twisted into something feral mom lunged grabbed
31:55emma by the throat should have died not her you emma thrashed but couldn't break free from a mad woman's
32:06grip the guards rushed in pulled her off emma stumbled out of the hut terrified they're all insane
32:14she bolted into the forest she didn't get far rogues the kind that haunted the borderlands
32:21preying on anyone foolish enough to run through the trees alone at night emma never saw them coming
32:27by the time she did it was too late she survived barely both legs shattered beyond repair
32:34she'd never walk again meanwhile mom was strapped to her cot staring at the ceiling tears streaming in
32:43her dreams she finally saw me i was 10 again no choker white dress smiling mom she reached for me
32:51crying with joy stella but the moment her hands touched me i burst into ash no she woke up screaming
33:02if she'd been wearing that choker it would have been blood red eternal torment i stood in the void
33:08watching it all mom strapped to her bed emma in a wheelchair begging on the market dad drunk and
33:15dead in some gutter i felt nothing no satisfaction just a flat dead calm my wolf padded over quietly
33:24she didn't howl didn't nudge just pressed her head against my hand and held it there in the distance a
33:31door of light appeared soft steady waiting i looked at my wolf she looked at me yeah time to leave
33:39this
33:40life was too bitter nothing worth holding on to i floated to mom's hut one final time she looked ancient
33:47hair completely white frail as paper she sensed something her cloudy eyes focused on a point in
33:53the air right where i stood stella is that you her trembling hand reached into the emptiness mom
33:59destroyed the choker i don't believe in it anymore come back please i'll cook for you no salary i'll buy
34:05you new dresses not emma tears rolled down her face i looked at the red marks on her neck from
34:11the frayed
34:11cord i i reached out my cold ghostly finger touched her forehead this was my final mercy sleep mom in
34:20sleep there's no pain her eyes fluttered shut she slumped into a deep dreamless rest a breeze blew
34:27through the hut the old journal on her cot flipped open the last page my dying words stared up at
34:33the
34:33ceiling but below it in shaky handwriting were new lines written by mom during a lucid moment next life
34:40let me wear the choker let me be the liar punish me however you want just don't leave me i
34:46stared at
34:46those words felt nothing too late repentance means nothing to the dead mom i don't hate you anymore
34:53but i don't love you either let's not meet again i turned away my wolf was waiting in the distance
34:59the
35:00door of light still glowed soft steady patient i looked at my neck the phantom verity choker still there
35:07even in spirit form the nightmare that had changed me for a lifetime i grabbed it it shattered into
35:13nothing i felt weightless free no red light no hunger no lies just freedom my wolf pressed against
35:20my side together we walked toward the light i didn't look back morning came a guard pushed open the door
35:26rachel time to eat no response she walked closer mom's hand clutched the torn journal a single tear
35:33crystallized at the corner of her eye she crouched beside her held two fingers beneath her nose nothing
35:38she was gone passing through the door wasn't violent no spinning no chaos just warmth like sinking into a
35:46spring stream i looked to my side my wolf was gone i didn't panic i pressed my hand to my
35:52chest and there
35:53she was steady warm then i heard her voice not a whimper not a whine clear and bright and full
36:00of life
36:00like the first time we met run i shifted four paws hit the ground and i ran through forests that
36:06smelled
36:07of pine and rain through cold shallow streams that splashed silver around my legs through meadows i had
36:13never seen but somehow knew my white fur caught the light my paws were sure my lungs were full my
36:20body
36:20was strong no choker around my throat no red light no hunger the lingering ache in my soul the phantom
36:28pain of 10 years started to fade with every step i ran toward brightness behind me old life dissolved
36:35like a worn photograph left out in the rain mom's final tear the red glow of the choker blood on
36:42the
36:42journal pages gone i didn't look back that 10 year nightmare was finally truly over when i opened my eyes
36:50again i was tiny wrapped in soft blankets someone was humming a woman's voice gentle off key but full of
37:01love her fingers brushed my cheek the scent of wildflowers not the cold clinical distance of my old
37:08mother not the silence of someone who only touched me to punish i blinked up at her she had kind
37:15eyes
37:15a soft smile she cradled me like i was made of glass grace is awake honey come quick our daughter
37:24just
37:24opened her eyes a man appeared tall a little awkward but his face lit up when he saw me he
37:31touched my tiny
37:32hand with one finger his voice was deep warm hey grace i'm your dad
37:40grace not stella no weight no chains no red light just grace a name that meant something light
37:49something cherished this house was small but warm full of light cartoon painting on the walls flowers by
37:57the window sunlight pouring through the windows warm on the floor i realized fast this family was nothing
38:04like the last one they never forced me to do anything there were no chokers no red lights no punishments
38:12for things i hadn't done i grew learned to crawl to talk and when i was three mom made a
38:20stew with celery
38:21the green stalks in the bowl triggered me i flashed back to choking throat swelling vomiting blood
38:27i stumbled backwards shaking tears came without permission mom immediately put down her spoon crouched
38:35pulled me into a hug grace what's wrong you don't like celery i couldn't speak just shook my head
38:43sobbing dad knelt too rubbed my back hey it's okay you don't have to eat it can you tell us
38:50why their eyes
38:51were patient gentle finally i choked out it hurts my throat makes me bleed they didn't say the verity
39:01choker doesn't lie they didn't accuse me of faking they took me to the pack healer immediately turns out
39:08i really do have a celery allergy after that celery never appeared in the house again mom added it to
39:15her market list grace's allergies celery she checked every time she shopped i lay in her arms that night
39:23smelling wild flowers and realized this is what it feels like to be believed love isn't measured by a
39:30stone it's listening even when the story sounds impossible when i was four dad took me to the pack
39:37healer for my first health check there was a blood draw i saw the needle and lost it flashes of
39:43the
39:43choker tightening around my throat flashes of starvation i screamed clung to dad's leg the healer
39:50sighed i couldn't stop shaking don't punish me i'm not lying dad immediately scooped me up sorry she's
39:58not ready we'll come back another time on the walk home dad didn't scold me for being weak he just
40:04asked
40:05gently grace did someone hurt you before i buried my face in his shoulder tears soaking his shirt
40:13mom choker red light i couldn't explain it clearly but he listened nodded it's okay dad's here now
40:24no one's ever hurting you again from then on they took me to the pack healer regularly not for blood
40:31draws just to talk she has been hurt be patient with her my parents never complained never made me feel
40:38like a burden they bought me a colorful necklace but never forced me to wear it this is just a
40:43pretty
40:43thing grace wear it if you want take it off if you don't we'll love you either way slowly i
40:50started to
40:51heal i could say i don't like this without fear i could say i'm scared i could say i want
40:59that i didn't
41:00have to worry about my heart racing being proof of a lie i started sharing my stories with them i
41:06cried when
41:06i didn't get a toy i laughed when i got praise i was finally just a pup a normal loved
41:13pup when i turned
41:15seven i started at the pack school there was a girl in my class annie sullivan she looked exactly like
41:22emma same eyes but her hair was shorter and she was timid scared the first time i saw her my
41:30heart
41:31clenched flashbacks emma's smug grin the green light mocking me i stepped back instinctively annie
41:39noticed she looked down voice barely a whisper i'm annie do you want to be friends her tone was so
41:48careful so desperate to please just like i used to be i glanced at her neck she wore a simple
41:56choker with
41:56green gem my stomach turned later i found out annie's mom was straight to his family demanded
42:03honesty locked her in her room without food when she made mistakes one day annie accidentally knocked
42:10over the teacher's ink pot she was trembling too scared to admit it i saw her face red rimmed eyes
42:17barely holding back tears i remembered myself at that desk writing i am a liar over and over
42:25i walked over took her hand annie it's okay accidents happen let's tell the teacher together
42:34she won't be mad annie looked at me shocked but mom says liars are bad wolves being honest isn't
42:41about never making mistakes it's about owning up when you do and even if you tell the truth you
42:47shouldn't be punished for it if the teacher gets angry i'll stand with you if your mom gets angry come
42:53to my house my parents will help i gave her the courage i never had she confessed the teacher
42:59forgave her told her to be more careful next time from that day on we have been best friends i
43:05brought
43:06annie home to meet my parents she saw how warm they were how they didn't yell didn't punish little
43:12things i told her you don't have to make everyone happy you're allowed to feel things say things one day
43:21annie's mom came to pick her up from school she saw us together and her face twisted she grabbed
43:27annie's hand did you mess up again is grace covering for you annie immediately looked down silent i stepped
43:36in front of her looked at the mom in the eye ma'am annie didn't do anything wrong she's a
43:42good pup you
43:43shouldn't always assume the worst she's scared of you the mom froze looked at me then at annie's
43:53tear-filled eyes her expression softened that night she called my mom thanked her said i'd opened her
44:00eyes over time annie's mom got gentler what you want to started listening instead of yelling and annie
44:06she blossomed confident happy i watched her laugh freely one day and felt this warmth in my chest
44:14i didn't get saved in my last life i suffered alone in the dark but this time i could save
44:20someone
44:21else i could stop another stella from happening maybe that's the gift my past life gave me the
44:27ability to see pain and to heal it when i was 10 my parents took me to visit grandma there
44:33was an old
44:33oak tree in her yard its branches spread wide casting shade over the whole garden i sat beneath
44:39it watching sunlight filter through the leaves my wolf dozed inside me warm and content then i saw her
44:46an old woman white hair hunched over a walking stick wearing a faded blue dress the second i saw her
44:53face
44:53i froze she looked exactly like rachel my old mother grandma noticed me too walked over slowly her eyes
45:01were hazy but there was something familiar in them something heavy what's your name child grace she
45:07repeated it softly grace that's a beautiful name she reached out like she wanted to touch my hair
45:13then hesitated pulled back like she was afraid of disturbing something sacred my mom came over
45:18steadied her mom this is our daughter grace so she was my grandma in this life too over the next
45:25few days
45:25grandma watched me constantly her expression was unreadable one morning she brought me a bowl of
45:31roasted meat grace eat up this used to be your favorite i stared at the bowl in my last life
45:36i
45:37wrote in my dying breath i want to eat mom's roasted meat and here was grandma saying those exact words
45:43tears blurred my vision this wasn't some distant wish anymore it was real right in front of me i picked
45:50up a piece bit into it tender sweet perfect grandma smiled a tired guilty smile that night lying in bed
45:59with
45:59my wolf curled warm inside my chest i thought about rachel's last words next life let me wear the
46:05choker let me be the liar punish me however you want just don't leave me i thought about her final
46:11tear the torn journal i didn't hate her anymore hating someone is like locking yourself in the past
46:17chewing on pain forever this life's warmth had already washed away the bitterness i just felt sad sad that
46:24she only understood too late real love was never about stones or punishment we stayed for a month
46:30then went back home before i left she held my hand grace live well be happy her voice was soft
46:37but heavy
46:37with meaning i nodded you too grandma i watched her walk away and i felt nothing no anger no grief
46:44the
46:45grudges of my past life were like fallen leaves blown away by the wind i wasn't stella anymore the girl
46:51locked in the dark choking on a lie i was grace sterling surrounded by love free at 13 i graduated
46:58from pack school got into the best academy in the region my parents took me to the lake for a
47:03picnic
47:03to celebrate i stood at the edge of the water wind in my hair the scent of pine and cold
47:08water on my skin
47:09i stretched out my arms feeling the freedom for a moment i saw her my ghost self floating desperate to
47:17hug
47:17someone but passing right through grace what are you thinking dad handed me a drink i smiled just
47:24i'm grateful to be alive to be with you both mom pulled me into a hug silly girl we're the
47:31lucky ones
47:32no one said anything we all just shifted at the same time like we'd done it a hundred times before
47:38we ran together through the trees through the shallow edge of the lake water spraying silver around
47:43our paws eventually i slowed down turned and threw myself at them we tumbled into the grass together
47:50mom nuzzled her head against mine dad licked the top of my head with lazy affection i pressed into them
47:57both and stayed there breathing hard warm all the way through i looked up at the sky through the canopy
48:03of trees i didn't need to prove i wasn't a liar anymore i didn't need to fear a red light
48:08i could laugh
48:09cry speak freely i had parents who loved me a best friend a healthy body a bright future this was
48:17the
48:17life i died wishing for that night i wrote in my journal not the blood-stained confessions of my old
48:23life this one was full of happiness growth love i wrote today we ran by the lake mom and dad
48:31shifted with
48:32me without saying a word we tumbled in the grass like pups i thought about my past self that little
48:37girl
48:37locked in a room choking in the dark desperate to be loved she'd never believe that i could be this
48:44happy mom and dad love me they taught me that honesty isn't something you punish out of someone
48:49it's something you grow with patience and warmth annie is my best friend now she laughs freely she speaks
48:57without flinching grandma is getting older but her eyes are warm when she looks at me my wolf grows
49:03stronger every day with her beside me i feel at ease i don't hate anyone anymore i don't cling to
49:10the past those painful memories are like paw prints in the mud washed away by rain but they taught me
49:16to
49:16cherish every step forward i know my old mom sister and dad got what they deserved and i finally broke
49:24free
49:24i found real freedom i don't want to see them again i don't want to relive that life i just
49:30want to be
49:30grace simple happy loved the lake was beautiful life was beautiful i closed my journal looked out
49:38the window moonlight shimmered on the water through the trees my wolf stirred softly inside my chest warm
49:44steady i smiled this life i finally became who i wanted to be no red light no starvation no lies
49:52just love freedom happiness and those scars from my past they became part of me proof that i had survived
49:59proof that darkness no matter how long it lasts cannot swallow you whole not if you keep moving toward
50:05the light the road ahead is long but i will walk it with courage with joy towards something even brighter
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