00:00Hello there, I'm Marie. I am currently working as a nanny babysitter here in Italy.
00:04Since I am underaged, I do not have a contract nor benefits that the government support,
00:10and with that, I can't get my degree from college or a university
00:14because I do not have neither the time and money to continue studying.
00:19I have to work three jobs so I can afford a degree.
00:22After babysitting, I am old enough to be at domestic services,
00:26but since babysitting is my only experience, they still don't recognize me as a laborer
00:32and will spend two to three years without contract, low monthly income,
00:36and my studies have to wait as well because I will be living paycheck to paycheck
00:41since I am helping my family in the Philippines as well.
00:44Now that I have options to find a job, I took a fast food job since it pays better,
00:49and I have a contract here.
00:51Benefits, and still with the long hours and expensive college degree,
00:55I will stay here in this job for another three to four years
00:59just to save enough for college and still giving half of my income to my family in the Philippines
01:04and one-fourth of the savings goes to bills.
01:08But I got pregnant.
01:10Peer pressure, no parental guidance.
01:13My friends are all from work and I am getting old.
01:16So I became vulnerable and lonely,
01:19and I thought this would be a way to normalize everything in my life.
01:24Now I have to quit the job because I am not covered with maternity leave.
01:28There is no sexual harassment law from work either.
01:32And I thought staying with someone is the escape I needed from all the abuses and injustices that I faced
01:38on my own.
01:39When I got pregnant, the father of the child vanished and never been found again.
01:44I struggled to take care of the baby while I'm doing factory work so I can get night shift differentials
01:49and over time pay and babysitters are cheaper when they just sleep with the baby at night.
01:54It is all I can afford, all I can do, and all that I have for now.
01:59I worked in different factories because I am always late, not in tip-top shape,
02:04and health is deteriorating as well to balance life and work at the same time.
02:10I am now 45 years old. My daughter is now 18 and went to college.
02:15I crawled and fought for her on my own, even if it cost me her love.
02:20She doesn't talk to me more because I wasn't there on her birthdays and holidays.
02:25I am always at work and always busy.
02:27Now I'm on my own again, still supporting her through her finances,
02:31but I can now feel the lifetime of work and jobs through my nerves and body.
02:36I am now alone, depressed, and vulnerable again.
02:41I am 65 years old today.
02:44My daughter doesn't talk to me anymore and got married without inviting me.
02:47I am working as a part-time gardener to the reason that I cannot retire
02:52because my employers before didn't pay for my taxes and dues
02:55because the job is without contracts, so they won't pay more taxes,
02:59and in return, I get a little bit more than just the basic pay.
03:03I traded all my life and hard work, and now I don't get anything back.
03:08No love, no pension, and no life.
03:11I have breast cancer from all the chemicals I inhaled when I was doing domestic jobs
03:16and from the fumes, from the factory.
03:18I am sick and dying.
03:20At the age of 74, I cannot do anything more than live day by day with what I have left.
03:27I got no money from my bank account, no daughter or granddaughter to love.
03:33No one takes care of me through all these pain I went through.
03:36I survived cancer for nine years now, but I didn't survive life.
03:41All the what-ifs of careers, better opportunities, love, family, and success
03:47are just mere moments of my inevitable destiny.
03:50If there is education for me, maybe I have a different story.
03:56If there is equal opportunity for migrants like me,
04:00maybe there is a career and success that I might have.
04:04And if there is justice and labor laws and acceptance of our talents and skills,
04:09maybe even uneducated, I can have a different outcome in life
04:14where there is happiness, contentment, family, and love.
04:19But all is lost when I traded everything for money that can't even pay for my bills or pension.
04:24I died today, not knowing how being married feels like,
04:29not remembering what it's like to be loved and cared for,
04:32and not knowing a better life and future for me.
04:36My life is full of regrets, but I did what I have to do.
04:48I did what I did.
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