- 1 day ago
Bait S01E05-6 (2026)
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TVTranscript
00:16¡Gracias por ver!
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04:42Ok mate,
04:43um, give us a few minutes
04:44We'll just-
04:44And we'll be right back
04:45Alright
04:51You've got to be kidding me
04:55What in the shitting hell are you doing man?
04:59If you keep your mouth shut
05:00Then maybe I can focus
05:01Focus on this
05:03You sentient ballbag
05:04You should be at home
05:05¡Suscríbete al canal!
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09:49Es todo en white, ¿eh?
09:51El miembro tiene sus privilégios, ¿no?
09:54Es un completo maldito.
09:56¿Tienes que ir a la policía?
09:57¿Qué es tu primer mistakeo?
09:58Vamos, vamos a encontrar tu familia, ¿vale?
10:01Ok.
10:02Ok, es bueno que escuchas que te digan eso.
10:04Porque nadie me crees.
10:05Me gusta.
10:06Me hace sentirme segura.
10:08Bueno, tengo una llamada, algo que se llama el sistema de kilner.
10:10Ahora, ahora, luckily Wembley es CCTV a la hilt.
10:13Entonces, si tu familia ha estado en cualquier calle, en Londres, en las últimas ocho horas,
10:17I will be able to track their exact location down to the inch,
10:20and as soon as I get a ping, you'll be the first to know.
10:23Really?
10:23Yeah, man.
10:24All good.
10:25That's fucking amazing.
10:27Thank you.
10:27I didn't realise your company had that kind of reach.
10:30My company has the biggest reach there is, all right?
10:33Don't worry.
10:33Look, listen, here's the thing, right?
10:34Your family, that's today's problem, yeah?
10:36And what about tomorrow's problem?
10:38Now, do you want to be reactive, or do you want to be proactive?
10:42I want to be proactive.
10:43Of course you fucking do.
10:44You are on the precipice of something massive,
10:46and all that backlash that you've been experiencing recently,
10:49it will only get worse.
10:51Trust me, I know.
10:51I've fucked the audition, and my prospects have gone down the toilet, so...
10:56Listen, I wouldn't be here talking to you now if that was the case.
11:00Would I?
11:02So you've got your recall later, correct?
11:06Yeah.
11:07Yeah.
11:07So you're going to go in there, you're going to do your audition,
11:10and when you do, those decision-makers will be primed in your favor.
11:19Do you understand?
11:20You understand?
11:21Well, how, how, how...
11:23How are you going to do that?
11:29Are you on my five?
11:32It's okay.
11:34Holy fuck.
11:35Okay.
11:35It's not a big deal.
11:36It's not a big deal.
11:37Okay, listen to me.
11:39I'm the only call you'll ever need to make.
11:42We've got your bag.
11:47What?
11:48There's a catch, isn't there?
11:49No.
11:51I mean, look,
11:53every relationship's a two-way street, isn't it?
11:55So,
11:57basically, what we're trying to do is,
11:59we just want to build bridges
12:01to your community,
12:02and in order to do that,
12:03we rely on individuals such as yourself
12:05just to help us with, um,
12:07messaging, you know,
12:07as a prominent Muslim,
12:09and soon to be more so your voice,
12:11it carries a lot of weight, Sean.
12:13So let's use it.
12:15Yeah?
12:17Right.
12:18Sean, let's cyber.
12:20Now.
12:21Just remember we're the good guys.
12:22Yeah?
12:23Don't forget that.
12:25Sean!
12:27Well, just...
12:28Just use the toilet, I'm going to be all right.
12:29Don't go anywhere.
12:30Thank you.
12:31I'll be here.
12:35Sir?
12:36I mean, that sounds shady as shit.
12:38No?
12:39Shah, I was wrong.
12:40Going to Nigel was a masterstroke,
12:43albeit an accidental one.
12:45What are you talking about?
12:46He wants me to be a snitch.
12:48Snitch?
12:48He's not asking you to honey-trap an ayatollah, is he?
12:51He's offering you the role of a lifetime
12:54in exchange for some light PR work.
12:56I'm not a sell-out fed.
12:58Sorry.
12:58Sell-out?
12:59Well, pardon me,
13:00Nelson pissing Mandela.
13:02You want to star in a franchise that brazenly sells watchers, cars,
13:06and the British Secret Service.
13:09This is the only way you will land this role.
13:14I guess I just always thought I was someone who represents us to them.
13:19You know, not them to us.
13:21You're not representing them or us.
13:24This is about you, Shah,
13:26and who you want to be.
13:28And put simply,
13:29do you want to be talking to a pig's head in a toilet,
13:31panicking about your career and your family,
13:34or do you want to be the hero of this story?
13:37The ultimate shitting hero?
13:39No, because that, my friend,
13:41is what is on the table.
13:56Shah?
13:59Shah, what the hell are you doing, man?
14:03Hello?
14:04I'm improvising.
14:05Oh, God.
14:07Access.
14:07Oh, God.
14:26What the hell are you doing?
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16:55Gracias por ver el video.
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23:48¿Por qué no intentan que todo es bien?
23:50No tenemos que estar!!
23:51¡No pretende todo lo que está!
23:53¡No lo estoy!!
23:54¡Pretendiendo, ahora!
23:56¡No!
23:56¡Pero, no!
23:57¡Pero, no!
23:57¿Qué te preocupes?
23:59¿Pero?
24:00¡Pero!
24:02¡Pero!
24:03¡Pero!
24:04¡Pero!
24:05¡Pero!
24:05¡Pero!
24:05¡Pero!
24:06¡Pero!
24:06¡No, no, no!
24:07¡PUé, no!
24:07¡Muy, enos!
24:08¡For s.a.
24:09¡Emergence!
24:10¿Qué servicio?
24:11¡Embulance, por favor!
24:12¡Pero!
24:14¡Pero!
24:14No, no, no, no, no.
24:57No, no, no, no, no.
25:14I didn't deserve me.
25:15I even got your slot pushed at the end of the day.
25:17Oh my god, I fucking love you.
25:18Now listen, we've got to clean you up, sort this shit out with your family.
25:21So I don't need you distracted in the room today, okay?
25:23All right, yeah.
25:25All right.
25:25Absolutely.
25:30Hey, I care about you, you know that, right?
25:35Yeah.
25:36I do.
25:38Thank you.
25:48Hola
25:49¿In here, baby?
25:52¿Cómo estás?
25:54¿Cómo estás?
25:56We're fine. ¿Cómo estás?
25:58I'm okay. I was so worried about you all.
26:02She's fucking crazy, bro.
26:04What the hell are you doing, Felicia?
26:05Going above and beyond as your agent.
26:07Again.
26:09Sit down.
26:10I can't believe I was going to do work.
26:11It's really...
26:11All right, shut up.
26:15You think that I'm going to put up with your crap for eight years
26:18and let this opportunity pass me by?
26:19If you're not happy, then we can talk.
26:21I can change the commission structure.
26:22Oh, I'm not doing this because I'm unhappy.
26:25I'm doing this because you are.
26:26That doesn't even make sense.
26:28That's all, you bitch.
26:30Char, do you want to know why you're blocked?
26:32Why you fucked the biggest moment of your career?
26:35You are looking at reason one,
26:37one, two, three, and four.
26:40You are obsessed with getting their blessing.
26:43Their approval.
26:44To be fair, he's been fixated on a lot more people's approval than just us.
26:48Ain't it?
26:48Yeah, ain't it?
26:50She's right.
26:50You keep trying to take people with you.
26:52But that's why there's only two seats in a DBS.
26:54Is that like a jet?
26:56It's an Aston Martin, you idiot.
26:57You know, the fact you didn't even mention the DB-12 to him
26:59proves to me that you're a blood-cloth pagan.
27:02The fuck did you call me?
27:03Just use being true.
27:04They don't understand you.
27:05Shut the fuck up!
27:06Listen to me, Char.
27:07If you want to nail this audition,
27:09you have to eliminate all of them first.
27:15But these are my people.
27:18Everything I do is for them.
27:23You're ashamed of them.
27:24You're always trying to fix and change them,
27:26but you can't, so just cut them loose, man.
27:28You told me when you signed me that we were going to change things.
27:31We were going to make a difference.
27:32Yes, to your life.
27:34I'm not trying to give the whole village a piggyback.
27:37I mean village.
27:37We're from Karachi.
27:38We've got running water there, thank you.
27:40Listen, making a difference means paying minimal tax.
27:45Maybe you buy a couple holiday homes.
27:47You can hire a few assistants who look just like you.
27:50That's what I want.
27:51But what do you want, Char?
27:53Material stuff doesn't really matter to me.
27:55I'm an artist.
27:56I feel, I feel, I feel.
27:59What?
27:59Why can't you accept that?
28:00I'm an artist.
28:02Yeah, you know what?
28:03True artists, they don't give a fuck about other people
28:06or what they think.
28:07Come, let's do this loud now first.
28:10Don't do it!
28:16This should be the one who does it.
28:20Say what?
28:24Charger?
28:24Shut up, Mummy.
28:26What the fuck are you doing, bro?
28:27Stop undermining me in front of everyone.
28:29You always do that.
28:31You will not shoot Mummy and Baba, okay?
28:34I forbid it.
28:34I'm in control now.
28:36Don't talk to your mother like that.
28:38Also, shoot her first.
28:39What?
28:40Come on, Char, everybody knows you pushed him into this.
28:43Your ambition, the pressure, the ridiculous school.
28:47Oh, that's from somebody who dragged us all to a whole new country.
28:50I'm sure that was so happy in Bucks.
28:51And the best actor award goes to.
28:54Shut up!
28:55I decide who gets it.
28:56And in what order?
28:58Bro, quick sidebar.
29:00Um, like, why am I even tied up?
29:02I've been your biggest fan since day.
29:04Like, do you know how many anonymous tweets I wrote defending you?
29:06Oh, I appreciate that.
29:07Yeah.
29:08I'm your ride or I die, Cass.
29:10Obviously, I don't really want to die, but...
29:11Listen, these men are old as fuck.
29:13Like, they're on their way out already.
29:14You can do them guilt-free, do you know what I'm saying?
29:15Can you just shush?
29:16Okay?
29:16You're only here for the free shit and the clout anyway.
29:18How about you, shush?
29:19Yeah?
29:19You've been jealous of this man before you could walk?
29:21I took...
29:21Bro, I've been here for you since day one.
29:24I took a knife for you.
29:26Yeah?
29:27And my brother, I need to be here with you.
29:28For you.
29:29To defend you off from these snakes.
29:30You ungrateful fuck...
29:31Shut up, I'm a little bit of a deal.
29:33Listen to me, Cass.
29:34Any time I took the piss out of you, it was just character building.
29:37I was building you.
29:37You hate him.
29:39Sadhu, Janash, shoot Zulfi.
29:40He would have strangled you in the crib if he couldn't...
29:42Hey, listen.
29:43Nobody's shooting anywhere.
29:43Shut up!
29:46Oh, Lord.
29:50Cos.
29:53I just want to say, yeah?
29:56Guess me, you know I'm here, Katnath.
29:58I want to apologize for saying...
30:04Oh, okay.
30:05Good.
30:05Yeah, nah, you got rid of the most toxic elements in our family, so...
30:08Yeah, bro, you know what?
30:09You actually did well.
30:10I kind of rate that, so that was mad.
30:11Like, we weren't expecting that, were we?
30:14I wasn't expecting...
30:17Oh.
30:24It's always been you and me, Sadhu.
30:31Just me and my beautiful boy.
30:44Where am I?
30:46Oh, I still sleep.
30:48How many fingers?
30:50Three.
30:51Name?
30:51It says here, Shahaj, Shahajah.
30:55Yeah, everyone calls me Shah.
30:57Mary?
31:01Your arms aren't the best, Mr. Lateef.
31:04It's been a long day.
31:05Yeah?
31:06What do you do for a living?
31:07I'm an actor.
31:09What have you been in then?
31:11You think I've seen?
31:12Probably not.
31:15Might be in next James Bond, though.
31:19One distance in a couple of hours.
31:21Have you taken a piss?
31:23No.
31:24Well, you have to before you go anywhere.
31:26You're dehydrated, love.
31:27Fuck.
31:29My...
31:29My family, yeah.
31:31They're gone, doctor.
31:32They're missing.
31:34Sounds like a busy day.
31:36Doctor will be in soon.
31:40Bond.
31:41Huh.
31:42Break a leg.
31:44Yeah.
32:06Yeah, and I thought that was great for just to find that's what I mean.
32:15Gracias.
32:18Mr Lateef, ¿qué están haciendo?
32:20¡I need you to go back to your room!
32:22¡No puedes seguirme aquí!
32:25¿Qué están haciendo, bro? ¡We están aquí!
32:28¡¿Qué están haciendo aquí?!
32:29¿Qué te dicen? ¿Por qué no te responde a tu mensaje?
32:32¿Qué? ¿Y tú?
32:33¡Look who has finally shown up!
32:36¡Baba! ¿Beta, dónde vayas?
32:38¡Oh, Shadju!
32:39¡Oh! ¡Oh, I told you! ¡Here you come!
32:44¿What happened to you, man? You look like shit.
32:46I slipped and hit my head like an idiot, that's all.
32:49What happened to you, Bob?
32:49This is a little heartache, nothing to piss your pants about.
32:52Where's Sophie?
32:53He's offering his new boyfriend.
33:02Oh, um...
33:03It's Braviz, okay?
33:04You've got more to worry about than Braviz.
33:05This is about you. I'm sorry, okay?
33:07We were just halal texting.
33:09Okay, it was one weird pic.
33:10Can you shut the fuck up?
33:11I'm not here about you. She can deal with you herself.
33:13I respect her.
33:14I do.
33:14Well, you're disrespecting me, didn't you?
33:15And you're wasting my time.
33:17Okay.
33:18Can I be honest with you?
33:20I love Muba, okay?
33:22And so does the investment team in Dubai.
33:25For real.
33:26Tomorrow afternoon, I'm flying out.
33:27Muba is first thing on the agenda.
33:33Tomorrow afternoon.
33:34Yeah, you know what?
33:35Come with me.
33:36I love you.
33:37I'll pay for your flight.
33:39Wait.
33:41I think I've got to see him right now.
33:43Bro, they're getting on a plane.
33:44Well, then come.
33:44We've got to go.
33:45But you have your audition today.
33:47Mummy, fuck the audition.
33:48I have to see Zofie.
33:51Come on, man.
33:53I can't do this without you.
33:56Is your phone fully charged?
33:57Yeah.
33:58Then yeah, I can't do this without you.
34:05I could get fired for just having you in this car.
34:08Oh, yeah.
34:09Zofie banned you from the app.
34:11Nice.
34:12No, nothing's gonna happen to you, mate.
34:13That's me on the dashboard, alright?
34:15Really?
34:18I thought it was Dev Patel.
34:20Right, you know what?
34:22You get it before 3.30, I'll give you an extra 20 quid.
34:24How's that?
34:24Wait.
34:25Chill.
34:25Yeah, this is my account.
34:26I'm good for the dough.
34:27No, you ain't.
34:30What?
34:31You leave tags on your clothes.
34:36It's harder to return them with the tags off, alright?
34:38Alright, stop it, bro.
34:39It's embarrassing.
34:40Shit.
34:41We might not even make it in time.
34:43You'll make it?
34:43I know all the shortcuts to the airport,
34:45while avoiding all the speed cameras and CCTV.
34:48I could even get you through security,
34:51and onto a runway if you want.
34:52Just try the car.
34:53Please drag the car.
34:55To the terminal, not the runway.
35:06That way.
35:07That way.
35:08That way.
35:12That way.
35:14That way.
35:15Oh, shit.
35:16Yasmin.
35:17What are you doing here?
35:18I'm just, um...
35:19Oh, my God.
35:20You can't keep doing this.
35:22I can't believe this is happening.
35:23Um...
35:24I thought I made it clear when we spoke last night that this isn't a...
35:27I'm not here to try and stop your leaving.
35:29Oh.
35:30We're actually here to try and stop someone else leaving.
35:34I'm sorry, you saw him last night?
35:35You didn't tell me that?
35:36Ollie, right?
35:38Hey, nice to meet you, man.
35:39Yeah, I've heard a lot about you.
35:41Oh, my God.
35:42What happened?
35:43Oh, yeah, yeah.
35:44Oh, that's right.
35:45It's worse than it looks.
35:47Bro, seriously, you got to go.
35:48Yeah, we've got to go.
35:49What are you like, 6'2"?
35:50Hmm?
35:51Come on.
35:54What was that, Yas?
35:56I got...
35:57You got to be good as well.
36:00Excuse me, sorry.
36:01I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
36:02Excuse me, sorry, sorry.
36:04Sorry.
36:05Whoa!
36:06Boarding pass.
36:07We don't have boarding passes, but somebody that we really need to speak to has just gone through.
36:11Yeah.
36:11That's not how it works.
36:12Sorry, one sec.
36:14Have you got any photos of Sophie on the phone?
36:16Yeah.
36:16I'm going to go quickly.
36:18Excuse me.
36:19We have reason to believe that this individual is a terror suspect and a security threat.
36:23What?
36:23We need to locate them and stop them immediately.
36:25One moment, sir.
36:27What the fuck are you doing, bro?
36:28Trust me.
36:29It's going to work.
36:30No, no, no.
36:30I'm not in golf.
36:32Right.
36:33You said something about security.
36:34I did.
36:35Yeah.
36:35He's travelling to the Middle East.
36:36He runs a complex network of drivers, couriers, and black market dash cam suppliers.
36:41And how do you know this?
36:42I have links to the security establishment.
36:44What links?
36:44Mi-fi.
36:45Sorry, I...
36:46To Mi-fi.
36:50Yeah.
36:50Not buying it.
36:51Next.
36:53I'm sorry, what...
36:54What do you mean you're not buying it?
36:57I, you know, turn of voice, body language, the whole performance, really.
36:59I just didn't see it in the eyes.
37:01Let me go again.
37:02You film it this time, and we can watch it back together.
37:04You are already on camera.
37:05If you keep annoying me, I'm going to put you on the news.
37:08Better than having a hundred dead bodies and exploding 747 on the news.
37:11They don't fly 747s anymore.
37:12Because of people like this, I'm trying to tell you.
37:15Trained in Chechnya, fought in Afghanistan, the Battle of Kandahar, maybe you've...
37:18What are you doing?
37:21He's saying you're a security threat and a terrorist.
37:23I'm an entrepreneur.
37:25Sorry.
37:28Hey.
37:29Come and talk.
37:30Next.
37:30Yeah.
37:35You got blood?
37:37Oh yeah.
37:39I got hit by a car.
37:41You hurt?
37:42Yeah.
37:42Good.
37:49Well, I'm sorry.
37:51I'm really, really sorry.
37:53I've been a fucking dickhead.
37:54I've been a fucking dickhead.
37:55Shoot this.
37:56My whole life, I've seen you out here.
37:58Yeah?
37:58Doing you.
38:01I've been at home, bro
38:02Trying to repay your family for taking me in QA
38:09I should thank you
38:11You know what you made me realize?
38:13I have to do me
38:17Yeah
38:20Wait, is this like a real thank you?
38:21Like a fuck you, thank you
38:24Both
38:26I'm tired of being the little baby
38:27I'm not trying to be junior partner in a relationship
38:30And I hear that
38:31Yeah
38:32I don't want to control you
38:34I'm sorry, I swear to you
38:36I just, I've just been ticking boxes my whole life
38:39And
38:41You're not box, you are
38:43Flower
38:45With layers
38:46Like an onion
38:47Okay, you need to work on that
38:48Yeah
38:51What are you getting on that plane?
38:54I'm back in four days
38:57Oh
38:57Why didn't you just call me anyway?
38:59I, this is too important
39:06I love you, bro
39:07Say it again?
39:08I said you're a fucking prick
39:10You're a little prick too
39:11Yeah
39:16That way
39:18Economy
39:19I'll see you at baggage claim
39:21For fuck's sake
39:24Yes
39:24I'll put yourself together
39:25I'll be grinning the air for you
39:27Man, give me my phone please
39:28It's children now
39:30Psycho
39:33I don't know if you're still down
39:35But you could probably still make an audition
39:36I don't know if you're still down
39:38I don't know if you're still down
39:40I don't know if you're still down
39:41I don't know if you're still down
39:43I don't know if you're still down
39:43I don't know if you're still down
39:44I don't know if you're still down
39:44I don't know if you're still down
39:44I don't know if you're still down
39:46I don't know if you're still down
39:47I don't know if you're still down
39:48I don't know if you're still down
39:49I don't know if you're still down
39:50I don't know if you're still down
39:51I don't know if you're still down
39:52I don't know if you're still down
39:53I don't know if you're still down
39:54I don't know if you're still down
40:13No, no.
40:35No, no.
40:48No, no.
40:48No, no.
40:51No, no.
40:57No, no.
41:29No, no.
41:33No, no.
41:40No, no.
41:41No, no.
41:46No, no.
42:16No, no.
42:16No, no.
42:20No, no.
42:47No, no.
42:52No, no.
43:22No, no.
43:22No, no.
43:47No, no.
43:50No, no.
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