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00:09it's show time I've got to go out there and do the show I am a little bit nervous why
00:18I don't
00:19know there's a lot of people out there I love doing this yeah but it makes me nervous yeah
00:28but just try to relax and be funny relax okay and be funny that's a good tip and don't take
00:36your shirt off okay no shirt off relax and be funny ladies and gentlemen please welcome Al
01:22welcome we here we are very fun thanks for turning up
01:28it's weird if you don't I did I did my first special was called Fee-Fan Svaria right this
01:35one's called Svaria syndrome it's about me falling in love with you people right and how it's happened
01:40you know again I will be saying Fee-Fan a lot I still think it's the greatest word ever invented
01:47you know I could have just walked on here tripped up I'd be like oh Fee-Fan everybody understands I
01:55think you could climb Mount Everest get up the top forget your flag you'd be like oh Fee-Fan
02:04everybody understands
02:11if Swedes don't say Fee-Fan they say oi oi oi oi oi oi which I think's brilliant
02:19oi oi oi oi oi i think oi oi oi oi is reserved for special things you know like if
02:26your child spills
02:27yogurt on the carpet you cannot go in with a Fee-Fan freaks them out scars them for life
02:34you gotta be kind you gotta go in with a oi oi oi oi oi oi just calm that shit
02:41down and I went to a football
02:45match, it's sporting, it's sporting things you do here. You sing it, you go, oi, oi, oi.
02:50It's the most calming hooligan song of all time. It's an amazing way. Like, I watched
02:58England play Svarja, right? The English fans, angry, shirts off, tattoos, they're like,
03:04you're gonna get your fucking edge kicked in. And the Swedes were behind the other goal,
03:10they're like, oi, oi, oi, oi, oi, oi, oi.
03:15It just calms it down.
03:21Pretty fun, two people. Oi, oi, oi, oi.
03:25If we lose you in the forest, we'll know how to find you.
03:28Just, oi, oi, oi, you'll come walking out. Oi, oi, oi, oi, oi.
03:34But it's brilliant, even at that game, they did this thing, they went,
03:36Andra, Siden, Aniklara. Beautifully Swedish.
03:41Make sure everybody's ready before we can have some fun.
03:46Andra, Siden, Aniklara. They boo the first one. Boo!
03:52Gustav hadn't finished his corv yet.
03:56And then they come back with this weird gangster hip-hop from the 1800s.
04:00They're like, yeah, yeah, yeah, man, son, fuck us, butter!
04:05It's the most weird comeback ever. It's like some kind of, like, smurf, horny smurf, you know?
04:11Yeah, yeah, man, son, fuck us, butter!
04:17Incredible country.
04:19Genuinely love it here. How many people have moved here? Anybody move from somewhere else?
04:23Excellent. Where have you come from, sir?
04:25New Zealand.
04:25New Zealand! Excellent!
04:28You did not let down the voice there. I like it.
04:31New Zealand!
04:33Excellent. I'm gonna tell you in this show about how I actually came...
04:36Well, I was born in England and I grew up in New Zealand, but, uh...
04:40And now living in Svarja, you know, I'm trying to be Swedish, you know?
04:45I've tried to get fit. I don't know why I'm doing this. It just feels appropriate.
04:50I tried. I've been trying to get fit. I did this run, right, called the Midnight Loppet, right?
04:55The Midnight Loppet.
04:57I don't know if you've heard about this run. It's brilliant.
05:02Very Swedish thing to do. A loppet. You just run it. This one starts at night time,
05:06so it's classic Sweden. You don't have to look at each other, talk to anyone.
05:11Just run around the city.
05:13This was me before the race.
05:20I did that last year and then this year I did it after a year of training.
05:25That's a year of training.
05:28You know those moments when you see the before and after?
05:33And after they look alright.
05:35But after I look unwell.
05:38I've lost my neck. Everything's happening.
05:43But if you've never done a loppet, please do it. It's amazing.
05:46You run around. It's on a Saturday night.
05:48It doesn't start at midnight. That's why I lost.
05:51And you basically, you run around and you're just running around the town like this.
05:55And it's good. And everyone's drinking.
05:57People are in the pubs and they're shouting at you.
05:59And you're like, oh, FIFA!
06:01Then there's one brilliant moment where you run up a hill, right?
06:05And up the top of the hill is a church, right?
06:07With a cross and lights.
06:08And there's no Swede at the bottom helping you out.
06:11They're all at the top waiting for you to die.
06:15So you're running up and you're seeing these lights.
06:17You're like, ha, ha, ha, ha.
06:19You think, I'm going to die.
06:22And the people at the top go, he's going to die.
06:25And to make it even weirder, they put up a choir up the top.
06:28A choir. They have a singing choir at the top.
06:32So how freaky is that?
06:34You're running towards the choir.
06:36Ha, ha, ha, ha.
06:37You're like, ha, ha, ha, ha.
06:39It's a, you know, in English, it's choir, right?
06:42But in, it's funny, you call it choir.
06:45But I talked to my wife's mum, Mordor, right?
06:48And she was like, nah.
06:50You know that Swedish no?
06:52Nah.
06:54She was like, you know, so aggressive, isn't it?
06:56Nah.
06:56Nah, eh.
06:58Can be for anything.
06:59Do you want some sugar with your cafe?
07:00Nah, eh.
07:04Day long, darling, day long.
07:08But she said to me, it's not choir.
07:11Inter-choir.
07:12It's queer.
07:13I was like, fee-fun, I don't think it is.
07:18But I should leave the room, but I'm going to stay here
07:20and listen to this explanation.
07:22She was like, I should know I'm a queer leader.
07:24I was like, fee-fun.
07:27I think I'll leave this one.
07:32Is anyone in a, in a, in a, in a cur?
07:34Anyone in a cur?
07:35Six percent of Swedes are in curse.
07:36I love the way you're pointing at that lady.
07:38That one there.
07:40Three seats ahead.
07:42Three seats ahead.
07:42There.
07:44What's your cur called?
07:46Joy voice.
07:47Joy voice.
07:48Joy voice.
07:49Joy voice.
07:50Are you soprano little or thingy?
07:53We're in the middle.
07:54You're in the middle.
07:54Classic Sweden.
07:57Don't get involved.
07:58Don't get involved.
08:02Where can we see joy voice?
08:04When are they on next?
08:07We sing very quietly at once.
08:11You sing quietly.
08:14That's beautiful.
08:15That's, that's the pure joy voice, isn't it?
08:19That's what I'm saying.
08:19That you're just walking along and just hear.
08:30It's joy voice.
08:32I just run off
08:33No, we're not joy-voiced
08:386% of Swedes are in Körs
08:40I like that, you know
08:42But I loved it
08:43And we ran up the hill
08:44And there's the Kör
08:44And now when I look at my fitness
08:46My fitness has never been great, you know
08:48I think probably the height of my fitness was this
08:53This was when I was in New Zealand, right
08:54I grew up in New Zealand
08:57And some days I look at this photo
08:59It freaks me out, this photo
09:00I don't know if they're my legs or not, you know
09:07Really freaks me out
09:08And don't freak, it's not going to get any further and further
09:12You haven't turned on a 3D program, don't worry
09:15I don't know if it's a skirt or a shirt
09:18I showed this photo to my kids
09:20My kids were like, Papa, it's like a morning rock
09:22Papa's got a morning rock
09:25Which is always weird in Swedish, isn't it
09:26Papa's got a morning rock
09:27I'm like, Fee Fan, I haven't
09:34But this is when I grew up in little New Zealand, you know
09:36Because I was born in Huddersfield
09:38In Northern England
09:39Huddersfield
09:40I don't know if you know much about Huddersfield
09:43If you've been to Huddersfield
09:45You'd understand why we left Huddersfield, right
09:47It's not one of the greatest places
09:49It's where they do Hem to Gordon
09:51You know Hem to Gordon?
09:53Yeah!
09:55Be fun
09:56I love that about this week
09:57I love not having a job and sitting there in my morning rock
10:02Watching Hem to Gordon
10:06But it's an amazing place, right
10:08And we grew up there
10:09Now my parents, my parents live in New Zealand
10:11They're still there
10:12They're loving it, you know
10:14And my mum and dad are very different
10:16You know, obviously
10:17One's a mum, one's a dad, right
10:20And I love it, you know
10:21My mum's about this tall
10:22We don't know if she's a hobbit yet
10:25Tests haven't come back
10:27And my dad's about this tall
10:29He's just through the glass now
10:31So he thinks he's taller
10:34But he's about that tall
10:36And he doesn't speak
10:37He doesn't talk
10:38He's a nice guy
10:38He's like a Norlander
10:39You know, like those guys up there
10:41Just doesn't say a word at all, you know
10:44Their telephone bills must be minimal, eh
10:47Must be them just going
10:48I'm stuck in the snow
10:49That's it, you know
10:51That's like a lengthy conversation up there
10:54But I loved it, you know
10:55And my
10:56We now try and communicate on technology
10:58On Skype, you know
10:59To my mum and stuff
11:00Because my mum is one of these people that
11:02She's fearless, you know
11:03She'll go up to someone in a pub and talk
11:05You know
11:05I think that's very freaky for you people
11:08You're like
11:08No, no, no
11:09Ha, ha, ha
11:11And when she was here recently
11:13She said she met Robbie Williams
11:15In a pub in Lillehoman in Stockholm
11:17She showed me the photo
11:19She hadn't
11:22She'd met the drunkest Hammerby fan of all time
11:25Just so confused
11:27He was just standing there like that
11:32My mum got him to sing Angels three times
11:38But we keep in touch, you know
11:40We keep in touch
11:40We have Skype now
11:41You know
11:42We've got my mum from the laptop onto the phone
11:44The mobile phone, Skype
11:45That blows her mind
11:46Because she looks into it
11:48And she's like
11:48Fyfan, that's not a camera
11:50That's a phone
11:52That should be in my ear
11:53And now my kids are looking in my mum's ear
11:56And they're going
11:56Grandma, get it away from your ear
12:00And then she freaks out
12:01She hit the screen
12:02You know when it turns the screen
12:03Went down the hallway
12:05The toilet door was open
12:06And my dad was just sitting on the toilet
12:10You can't write that kind of stuff
12:13He's just looking at me like
12:14Alright son
12:18It's just an amazing world
12:21But I never had like any intention of coming to Svari
12:24I don't know about people that have moved here
12:26I don't know how you've moved here
12:27I want to tell you how I got here, right
12:28I moved when I was working in a bar in London, right
12:33I got a job in London
12:34And I was working in this bar
12:36I thought, do you know what, I'll try this
12:38I was working in a bar
12:39And then my wife walked into the bar
12:42I did not know she was my wife at the time
12:44I wasn't like, be fine, I know you
12:47I'd never met her
12:48And she came up to me and she said
12:50Can I have a rum and coke please?
12:52And I said, how much coke would you like with that?
12:56Very charming barman
13:02And she said, you should know that's your job
13:08I thought, that's that Swedish flirting I've heard about
13:13Cold and calculated
13:17We started dating, we fell in love
13:19You know, very beautiful moment
13:21She said, we'll go to Svari and have a look around
13:24See if you like it
13:25She brought me here
13:26She brought me to this country
13:28You know, very clever
13:29She brought me here in summer
13:32And, uh
13:34Just different country, isn't it?
13:37You guys are talking to each other
13:38Everything's happening
13:40Mankini's on, everybody's dancing
13:42You know
13:42Pass me the beach ball
13:43Yippee!
13:44You know
13:46And I remember walking along the beach with her
13:48Hand in hand
13:49And I was like, this is beautiful
13:52I don't know what was wrong with my throat at the time
13:54This is beautiful
13:57And I said to her, this is great, God
13:59I said, what are the winters like?
14:02And she stared at me and she went
14:03Shift on!
14:07And we moved
14:08We moved
14:10She made the decision that we would move
14:12So we moved
14:13We came here to Svariya
14:15And, uh, I, I, I love it, you know
14:18Slowly, you know
14:19It took me a while
14:20I was confused at first
14:22You know
14:23I was introduced to all these things
14:25You know, the great Swedish four
14:26You know
14:27These are the things you've got to do
14:29You know
14:30I've done them all
14:31I've done the collection
14:32I won't be going back there
14:33You know
14:35I didn't like sugar until I got here
14:37But I need it
14:39Because what I love about you Swedes
14:41Is you celebrate cakes, don't you?
14:43You have days for cakes
14:46Like the rest of the world
14:47They bring out a cake to celebrate an event
14:51You bring out a cake to celebrate the cake
14:57Very fun
14:59Like the other day
15:00It was Kladakaka dog
15:04There's no surprise with these days
15:06You're going
15:07Oh, I wonder what cake it is
15:08It's Kladakaka!
15:12It's the full circle of fika
15:15Independence Day, cake
15:21It's the darken of the waffel
15:26But it is confusing, you know
15:28And now I'm into it
15:29I'm into the sugar, you know
15:31And I don't know about you
15:32Or you
15:32And when you first come here
15:33You think
15:34Oh, you know
15:34Get to know the Swedes
15:36Understand them more
15:37So my wife took me to this
15:40Modern interpretive dance
15:41Of the history of Svadia
15:43That's the correct response to that
15:49They just danced
15:50For five hours
15:54Historic moments in Svadia's history
15:58They did the Vasa ship going down
16:00In dance
16:14Five hours
16:17They even danced
16:18The Stockholm Syndrome
16:19You know, the bank robbery
16:20The bank robbery
16:21In Alstermalm
16:22I mean, if you're going to have a dance
16:24You might as well dance about that
16:34Five hours
16:36I remember sitting there
16:42Confused
16:45And I said to my wife
16:47What's going on?
16:48She grabbed me by the knee
16:49And she said
16:50You're going to love it here, aren't you?
16:53I was like
16:54Fyfan, I'm not so sure
16:59But slowly you've got me
17:01You've got me slowly
17:02That's what I love, you know
17:04The other day we went to Alopis
17:06Have you been to Alopis?
17:08If you've never been to Alopis
17:09Don't go!
17:12I'll tell you what Alopis is
17:13Alopis is when you buy shit
17:15That you don't need
17:17Then a month later
17:18You have your own Alopis
17:20To get rid of the shit
17:21You didn't need
17:23I bought a frog
17:24With a Mexican hat
17:25Holding a fishing rod
17:27Fifteen krona
17:28I thought
17:28Fyfan, this is the bargain
17:30Of the year
17:35And then I was like
17:36The Alopis
17:37What is the Alopis?
17:38And then she took me
17:39To a Bakaluka Alopis
17:43If you've never been to
17:44Oh, I mean
17:45The Bakaluka Alopis
17:46Heardly good
17:48The Bakaluka Alopis
17:49Is the Premier League
17:50Of shit shopping
17:53It was the weirdest
17:54Transaction I've ever
17:55Been involved in
17:57I was just walking
17:58Around like this
17:59I felt like I was
17:59In the Mafia
18:00Or something
18:01Open the boot
18:05Let's have a look
18:05It's your goods
18:09Got my mate
18:10To taste the goods
18:10He's like
18:11That's pure
18:11That's good stuff
18:12That's good stuff
18:13I was like
18:14We'll take that
18:14That's lingon sil
18:15To tux him again
18:17Two jars
18:18No, I don't have swish
18:21The whole shopping process
18:22Is amazing here, isn't it?
18:23I love that, you know
18:24I'm queuing like you people
18:26That's a thing you find out
18:28When you feel
18:29Oh, God
18:29I am one of these people
18:30Because you queue
18:32Swedes queue
18:32Just when
18:33No queues needed
18:35At airports
18:36You queue
18:37When a queue
18:38Is not even started
18:41You can pick the Swedes
18:42Because the gates open
18:45But nobody's boarding
18:46So Swedes
18:47You can just see Swedes
18:48Like this
18:49Just trying to get closer
18:50To the desk
18:56They're like little meerkats
18:58You know
19:07And I'm doing this now
19:08I'm doing that
19:08I do this every day
19:09Even without thinking
19:10I put my basket down
19:11That's what Swedes do
19:12When they're in a queue
19:13In the shopping market
19:14They put the thing down
19:15And they just kick it
19:19For no reason
19:25Like it's not enough punishment
19:27They're going to be cooked
19:28I'm going to kick you as well
19:33I hate when they get
19:34You get behind someone
19:35Who's got the basket
19:35And they're kicking their basket
19:37And then they go
19:38And they run off
19:40Because they've forgotten milk
19:42Or something
19:43Or as you say in Svenska
19:44Milk
19:45Right
19:46Which sounds like
19:47You're vomiting
19:47Halfway through
19:49Milk
19:50They run off
19:51They're like
19:52So now you're just behind
19:54There's no one there
19:55You're just behind a basket
19:56So you give it a few kicks
19:59The people behind you
20:00Are like
20:00Come on
20:01Hurry up
20:01You're like
20:02If you're following someone
20:03And then the person
20:04And the thing's going
20:05Call me in
20:05You're like
20:07And then just as you go
20:08To go over
20:08They return
20:09Just then
20:10They're like
20:10Nah
20:14It's an incredible
20:23And I apologise so much
20:25My Svenska's terrible
20:26Right
20:27And I've got a friend
20:29Called Bengt
20:30I hope you have as well
20:32Bengt's an amazing guy
20:33I love Bengt
20:34He always teaches me Svenska
20:36You know
20:36I had a sore throat recently
20:38He said
20:38Go and get some ginger
20:39For your throat
20:40I went up to the guy
20:41Behind the counter
20:42In the supermarket
20:42I was like
20:44Inganfara
20:46Inganfara
20:48Guy behind the counter
20:49I was like
20:50Inganfara
20:52Then he went off
20:53I thought he was going
20:54To find the
20:55Inganfara
20:56He was just finishing
20:57His shift
20:58So I'm following him
21:00He's like
21:00Inganfara
21:01Inganfara
21:01I'm behind him
21:02Like a penguin
21:03I'm like
21:03Inganfara
21:04Inganfara
21:06Beautiful
21:06Another thing
21:06Is when you
21:07You forget to buy
21:08The shopping bag
21:08I love that
21:09That's a Swedish tradition
21:11You pretend to forget
21:12To buy the shopping bag
21:14Can we stop doing this
21:17It's like an Oscar performance
21:19You get all your shopping
21:20You get through
21:21You look at it
21:22And then you do this
21:22You go
21:23Oh no
21:25Hey
21:30Jaglomda por sa
21:34You had no intention
21:36Of buying a bag
21:37You haven't bought a bag
21:39Since the age of three
21:41And you do this
21:42Oh no
21:43And even the queues
21:44They're going
21:44That was my plan
21:50Then you've got like
21:51700 bags
21:52Underneath your kitchen sink
21:54Just in case
21:55The Russians invade
21:58You have to keep them by law
21:59It has to be 700
22:03If you can't fit any more in
22:04You tie them into little plastic knots
22:07So they're tight
22:08They're like tight like that
22:10So when you actually do need them
22:11It takes you an hour
22:12To open it
22:15I'll see you there
22:19When I first came here
22:20My friend said to me
22:21What you should do
22:22Is go to the
22:24That's how you make friends
22:25In Sweden
22:26How you make friends
22:28In Svartia
22:28Go to the
22:29That's how you make friends
22:30Wipe everybody's name out
22:31And then just write
22:33Our picture
22:35Wait for conversation
22:36To begin
22:40He was correct
22:43I love cooking
22:44I love cooking
22:44I found the cooking world here
22:46That's great
22:46You know
22:46And you don't throw away food
22:48That's a Swedish tradition
22:49Wonderful
22:50Like it
22:50You don't throw it away do you
22:52You just put it in the fridge
22:53To die
22:55I love that
22:56Half a tomato
22:56You're like
22:57Don't throw that away
22:58That needs a cold death
23:02You pick it out
23:03About six weeks later
23:04When it looks like
23:05A bruised reindeer's testicle
23:09Verlort
23:12Banked
23:13He just wears speedos
23:14From May to September
23:17It's a beautiful sight
23:18Through my binoculars
23:19I can see what colour they are
23:21It's got a whole collection of them
23:22Just walks around
23:23In speedos
23:24It's majestic
23:27The other day right
23:28A few weeks ago
23:29He was doing the grass clipper
23:30You know
23:31The grass clipper
23:31With speedos on
23:33And protective glasses
23:37How beautiful is that
23:39No sense of priority at all
23:41Just walks along
23:45Looks at me
23:45He's like
23:46She ain't a grub
23:46She ain't nada
23:51But he's fearless
23:53You know
23:53He's fearless
23:54And that's why
23:55I sometimes think
23:56That this is where I belong
23:57You know
23:57This is my home
23:58You know
23:59Because he does things
24:00That I'm like
24:01Wow
24:02Like he goes in the water
24:03You know
24:04In the water
24:04No human
24:05Should be in the water
24:07You know
24:07Those people
24:08If you don't know
24:09Those people
24:09You are those people
24:12There's a small percentage
24:13Of Swedes
24:14That go
24:14I'm going in there
24:16I'm going in for a dop
24:19Hello
24:19A dop
24:22And he's there
24:23He's like
24:24Yeah
24:25Got his speedos on
24:28Even his schnop
24:29Is like
24:29I won't be here
24:29When you get back
24:34And
24:35The
24:38The East Bjorn
24:39Are out there
24:39Going
24:40Don't do it
24:41You're going to die
24:42We're freezing
24:43It's cult
24:44You shouldn't be in here
24:45No
24:47And then he just runs in
24:48He does this run thing
24:49And just runs in
24:50And he lasts about 10 seconds
24:52And then he comes out
24:53Trying to look for his towel
24:55He's like one of those horses
24:56In the Olympics
24:57You know
25:05He's taught me so much
25:06You know
25:07Taught me how to be a better parent
25:08I'll tell you that
25:09That's what I like about him
25:11You know
25:11Because parenting's tough isn't it
25:13I'm 46 years of age
25:14I find it incredibly tough
25:15I've got two kids now
25:17Anybody got kids
25:18Just two people
25:20Excellent
25:21Yeah
25:21Yeah I think so
25:22Yeah
25:23Thanks for asking
25:24Reminds me
25:25Where are they
25:26No
25:28Now I find parenting quite tough
25:30You know
25:30I've got an 8 year old
25:32A 5 year old
25:32You know
25:33Goobin goobin
25:33Goobin goobin
25:35And I love them
25:36You know
25:36The 8 year old
25:37Very wise little sweetie
25:39He said to me the other day
25:40Do you know who I love papa
25:41Do you know who I love
25:43I was like
25:43Fifa
25:44This is the moment
25:47I was like
25:47Who do you love
25:49He said
25:49I love myself papa
25:59I kind of stared at him
26:00I was like
26:00Va
26:02He said
26:02I love myself
26:03If you can't love yourself
26:04You can't love anybody else
26:06I was like
26:07Fifa
26:08You're the Dalai Lama
26:11Jump on my arm
26:12Young wizard
26:16And the 5 year old
26:17Swedish
26:18Full on Swede
26:19She says stuff like
26:21Inter douche
26:22Inter bad
26:23Papa
26:25I'm like
26:26Fifa
26:26You've got to have a wash
26:28I said
26:29If you don't have a wash
26:30People will leave you alone
26:31And not talk to you
26:32I forget she's Swedish
26:34She's quite happy
26:34With that situation
26:37She's like
26:38That sounds perfect
26:39Taka
26:39Taka
26:45I struggle with them
26:46My wife is a far superior person
26:49Way better parent
26:50Than I'll ever be
26:51You know
26:51It really is
26:52She just knows stuff
26:53You know
26:54Like where their school is
26:55And things like that
26:55You know
26:57For me
26:57Every day is an adventure
27:01It really is
27:02You know
27:02Even when things break
27:03Like the bike breaks
27:04I go
27:04I'll fix that
27:05And then my kids
27:06Just look at me
27:09Of course you will
27:12And I can't deal with both of them
27:13I'm terrible
27:14You know
27:14Trying to put them to bed
27:15And stuff
27:16I put my son to bed
27:17The other day
27:18And he said
27:18Can you read a story for me Papa
27:20And I'm always freaked out
27:21By the Swedish books
27:22They always weird me out
27:24You know
27:24I start reading them
27:26I'm like
27:26Fifa
27:26What's going on here
27:29Leave the window open
27:30For the 65 year old man
27:31With the propeller
27:32On his back
27:43Wants to come in
27:44For a week
27:47So I always tell him stories
27:48You know
27:49I love telling him stories
27:50And then I say
27:51Now time to sleep
27:52And he said
27:53Why is it that Papa
27:55Why is it over
27:55And I said
27:56You've got to go to bed mate
27:57He goes
27:58Are you scared Papa
27:59Are you
28:00Are you scared
28:03And I was like
28:04No
28:06More annoyed
28:08He goes
28:09You're scared aren't you Papa
28:12He he he
28:14I'm like
28:15No
28:16Not scared
28:16He goes
28:17Yes you are Papa
28:18And then something in my head
28:20Just went
28:20Come on
28:21Do this
28:21He said
28:22Are you scared Papa
28:23And I just looked at him
28:24And went
28:24Who's Papa
28:28When I did it
28:29It freaked the shit out of him
28:31As soon as I did it
28:33My brain went
28:33Uh what are you doing
28:37He just looks at me
28:38And goes
28:40Just starts running downstairs
28:42I probably didn't help it
28:43By running after him
28:44Going
28:45Who's Papa
28:45Who is Papa
28:49I get downstairs
28:51He's with
28:52You know
28:52His mum
28:53She's taking it well
28:54She's like
28:54You know
28:57Why
28:57Why
28:59I'm on this restraining order
29:01For like 20 minutes
29:02I couldn't go anywhere near him
29:03He's like
29:06I was fast asleep that night
29:08Five o'clock in the morning
29:09And then I just hear
29:10This kind of hit
29:11On my head
29:11I'm like
29:11He goes
29:13I can't sleep Papa
29:14I can't sleep
29:15I was like
29:16You gotta sleep
29:17Go to sleep Frank
29:21Frank
29:22I open my eyes
29:23He's got a torch
29:24Underneath his chin
29:25He looks at me
29:26And goes
29:26Who's Frank
29:30Hey fuck
29:32Honestly
29:33I did that kind of
29:35You know when you think
29:36You're falling out of bed
29:37That kind of
29:38It's like a
29:39Flannamusha's orgasm
29:40You know that noise
29:41I did enjoy
29:45Someone shouting out
29:46Frank though
29:47That was weird
29:48What happened there
29:49Why did someone go
29:50Fuck it
29:50I've got to get involved here
29:54I loved it
29:54It was just like
29:55I said Frank
29:56And you were like
29:56Frank
30:00Like you had a
30:02What's happening
30:02With this glass
30:04Is it just one person
30:06Just kicking a glass around
30:15But I do
30:15I find it hard
30:16Being a parent
30:17You know
30:17But I think
30:18It's a great country
30:18To be a parent
30:19You know
30:20You know
30:21We feed them healthy
30:22Don't we
30:22That's what we do
30:23Svaraya
30:23You know
30:23You feed them all
30:24All the week
30:25Monday to Friday
30:26Fresh food
30:27Comes to Saturday
30:28Different rules
30:30We're entering
30:32Lordag's goodies
30:33And my son
30:34Is eight
30:35So he knows
30:36That Lordag
30:36Is coming around
30:39Lordag
30:39Sugar
30:42Lordag
30:44So he's addicted
30:45I go up to his room
30:46On Monday
30:47He's like shaking
30:48In the corner
30:49He's like sweating
30:50Like this
30:51You haven't got any
30:52Any clubber
30:53You've got any
30:54A clubber
30:54Papa
30:54Maybe you're just a clubber
30:56Sneller papa
30:57Sneller
30:57Just something
30:58Something
30:58Sugary
30:59Sugary
30:59Sneller
31:00Papa
31:01Trying to sell me
31:02His toys
31:03And stuff
31:03You know
31:04Here I've got a frog
31:05With a Mexican hat
31:06And a fishing rod
31:06Come on papa
31:08Sneller
31:12And then on like
31:13Friday night
31:14His mouth's watering
31:15So we give him tacos
31:16To dry his mouth out
31:17Just jam them in
31:20Then Saturday mornings
31:21Chaos
31:21If you're a parent
31:22It's chaos
31:23In Svaraya
31:24Six o'clock
31:25In the morning
31:26You just hear them
31:26In their other room
31:27Going
31:28He he he he
31:31Today's the day
31:36You start shaking
31:37With fear
31:38They come in
31:39They leave my wife
31:40Alone
31:40They grab me
31:41They put two fingers
31:42In my eyes
31:44Supermarket
31:44No
31:50We get up
31:51To the supermarket
31:52It's not even open
31:54We're the first ones
31:55There
31:56When they're finally
31:57Let in
31:57It's just a wall
31:59Of sugar
31:59Isn't it
32:01That's what you guys love
32:02It's just a wall
32:02Of sugar
32:04My children are there
32:05Like this
32:06Today's the day
32:08Grab what you need
32:10I might push in
32:11The way
32:12Take your time
32:12Don't grab too many
32:13Just have a couple
32:14Just have a couple
32:15But then what do you do
32:16You give them
32:17A shovel
32:19Fee fan
32:20A shovel
32:21That's what you
32:22Dig roads with
32:24You give them
32:25This weapon
32:26You're like
32:26Here take this
32:27My son's like
32:28Ha
32:30Ha
32:30Ha
32:32He just starts
32:33Digging
32:33Like this
32:35It's chaos
32:36He hasn't even
32:37Got a bag
32:37He's just
32:38In one of the
32:39Buckets
32:40It's like
32:41He's on a steam train
32:42And it's coal
32:46And then
32:53It generally goes like this
32:55He's like
32:56And then my daughter
32:57She doesn't even
32:58Need the shovel
32:59She just runs
33:00Into a bucket
33:01Puts her head in
33:02Starts eating
33:04It's complete chaos
33:06I can't deal
33:07With this situation
33:08I'm pulling her out
33:09By the legs
33:09She's like
33:13They weigh my children
33:14On the way out
33:17And the whole of
33:19Saturday's just a mess
33:20They're just like
33:22They're like gremlins
33:23On acid
33:27All afternoon
33:28Chaos
33:28Yee-hee-hee
33:30Till about
33:31Seven o'clock at night
33:32And then they hit the wall
33:33They're like
33:33Oh
33:34Fee-fa
33:36I'm off to bed
33:37Papa
33:39See you on Monday morning
33:42Aye-yi-yi
33:45I don't let them
33:46Go to bed
33:46I think
33:46You've got to have
33:47Some food
33:47So what do I do
33:48I give them
33:49Kebab
33:49Pizza
33:52Hurray good
33:53The weirdest
33:54Combination of food
33:55Ever
33:57You are aware
33:58That's two meals
34:00Kebab
34:00And pizza
34:02But here you go
34:03For fun
34:04Let's combine them
34:06It's like having
34:06Hamburger
34:07Sopper
34:07It makes no sense
34:11It must have been
34:12A drunk person
34:13Just came in
34:14Couldn't decide
34:14What to have
34:15Went to a takeaway
34:16Was like
34:17Shall I have a kebab
34:17Or a pizza
34:19Kebab or pizza
34:20They're like
34:20He's been here
34:20For two hours
34:22Just put both of them
34:24In a box
34:24Shake it
34:25And give it to him
34:26He's like
34:27Tux and rick it
34:28How you doing
34:29That gets it home
34:30He's like
34:31Hey fun
34:31I wonder if they've
34:32Got banana and curry
34:43But it is tough
34:44Being a parent
34:45You know
34:45I'll be honest with you
34:46But this country
34:47Feels good eh
34:48You know
34:49And I'm
34:50Sort of trying to be
34:51Better you know
34:51And my son said to me
34:53The other day
34:53Shall we get a pet
34:54Papa
34:54And I was like
34:55Oh yeah
34:56This sounds nice
34:56What kind of pet
34:57Were you thinking about
34:58He said
34:59Horse
35:01I was like
35:02No no
35:02Think smaller
35:03Think smaller
35:04And then he said
35:05Mini grease
35:07You heard about
35:08These mini grease
35:09They're little grease
35:11But they're mini
35:11Like little things
35:13They're like
35:13Having a hund
35:14A pink hund
35:15And they just run
35:16Around like that
35:17And they're Swedish grease
35:18As well
35:19So they do
35:19You know
35:20They go like that
35:21But in your head
35:22They go
35:23Nerf nerf
35:31What happened there
35:32Then
35:35Which one of you
35:36Walked past the pig
35:37It went
35:38And you went
35:39That's nerf
35:39Nerf that
35:43I think even the grease
35:44Is like
35:45They're like
35:45Huh
35:48Nay
35:49Nay
35:49Nay
35:49Nay
35:50Nay
35:50Nay
35:50Nay
35:50Nay
35:50Nay
35:52Not
35:53No
35:53No
35:55Write it down
35:56Write it down
35:58So I said
35:59Nay
35:59Nay
36:00No mini grease
36:01Got to put your foot down
36:02Sometime
36:03So I said
36:04What we'll do
36:05I'll make you a deal
36:05Right
36:06I said to my son
36:06What we could do
36:07Right
36:07Is why don't I
36:09Borrow the neighbour's cat
36:12Nice response from you people.
36:14You're like, you did what?
36:16I asked the neighbour, be fine.
36:20I didn't just borrow the cat.
36:23God, I love you people.
36:25I didn't go in during the night,
36:28put a sock over the cat's head.
36:31Shhh, you live with us now, tickles.
36:35Come here now, you're kidnapped.
36:39Put it in the boot of the car, drive it round the neighbourhood
36:41so it doesn't know where it's been.
36:45No, I asked the neighbour if I could borrow his cat.
36:48It's a weird question, to be honest.
36:51Ask him to borrow the cat
36:53to see if my son is capable of looking after a cat.
36:56Because if something happens to the cat,
36:58that's a weird thing to take back.
37:00Just walking back like that.
37:02Forlort! It wasn't as good as we thought.
37:05Ah, ingham father, ingham father.
37:11So I borrow the cat, right?
37:12I got this little cat, walking home with the cat.
37:15I see the kids at the window.
37:15The kids are like, it's the cat!
37:17They're so excited.
37:19I can hear them running around.
37:20They open the front door.
37:21I put the cat down.
37:23The cat takes one little step,
37:24looks up and goes,
37:32My kids are like, we don't want that cat, Papa.
37:36There's something wrong with that cat.
37:38Even the cat knows it's annoying.
37:40It's like looking at me going,
37:41Oh!
37:44Oh!
37:45Oh!
37:47Apparently he had fur balls.
37:49Fur balls?
37:49Herbal, herbal, herbal.
37:52Hairy balls.
37:53Herbal, herbal, herbal.
37:55Herbal, herbal.
37:55Harbal.
37:57Herbal.
37:57You know?
37:59He had that thing in his throat, you know?
38:01Oh!
38:02Oh!
38:03Oh!
38:05Sounded like an asthmatic golem, basically.
38:09We had him round the house, just running.
38:11He didn't run much.
38:12He just kind of stopped every now and again.
38:13Oh!
38:14Oh!
38:16I'm like, Fifi, this cat's killing me.
38:19And then luckily, luckily, I get a show.
38:21I go up north.
38:22I have to leave the cat and the family.
38:24I thought, this is a great time.
38:26I can get back into the real world.
38:28I can catch up on sleep.
38:31I'm fast asleep in the hotel.
38:33And then the phone rings.
38:34It just comes up on the screen.
38:35Wife.
38:36I think when I call her, it says, idiot.
38:41I don't know what time it is.
38:42I don't know what day it is.
38:43I'm half asleep.
38:43I'm all over the place.
38:45I grab the phone.
38:46I'm like...
38:49Then the voice goes, it's the cat.
38:59What have you done with my family?
39:02How have you learned to speak?
39:05My wife goes, it's me, you idiot.
39:08It's not the cat.
39:10I'm like, Fifi, flaut.
39:12I'm just a bit asleep.
39:14She says, the cat's done a weird looking bice on the bathroom floor.
39:24I think, Fifi, you've run the wrong person here.
39:30I go, I can't help.
39:31And I hang up.
39:32Right?
39:32Of course I didn't do that.
39:35Very good.
39:37Relationships don't work like that.
39:39Yes.
39:40Exactly, sister.
39:43I said, how can I help the situation?
39:47Knowing full well I had no experience of the solution.
39:52Marriage.
39:55Yeah, and she said, I don't know.
39:57It's done a weird looking bice on the bathroom.
39:58I don't know what to do.
39:59I'm like, Fifi.
40:00I mean, people aren't calling me from around the world.
40:03A camel, you know, does a poo in Egypt.
40:05They're like, don't touch it.
40:06We'll call our picture.
40:08He'll know exactly what to do.
40:13And then my wife says this, right?
40:15She says, why don't you Google it?
40:17Just Google it.
40:18What?
40:20Google it.
40:21She goes, yeah, Google it.
40:22I'm thinking, Fifi, has Google gone down in Stockholm?
40:24Why can't you do it?
40:27I mean, there's a little hotel in Norland.
40:29I don't know what's going on.
40:31So I get my laptop up.
40:32I've got no Wi-Fi.
40:33So I have to go downstairs to the hotel reception
40:37at six o'clock in the morning or something
40:39and ask for a Wi-Fi code.
40:41It's one of the worst things a man can do.
40:44I walk down my laptop and go,
40:46you haven't got the Wi-Fi code, have you?
40:48The receptionist's like, yeah.
40:51There we go.
40:53And then I'm thinking, Fifi,
40:55if he knew what I was actually Googling.
41:00But then I got paranoid.
41:01I thought, what if I, you know,
41:03I start Googling and then I trip over, bang my head.
41:05He runs round, the receptionist, looks at the screen.
41:08It says, weird cat shit images.
41:11I'm like, Fifi.
41:14They're like, he was in a dark place.
41:21And then the moment that I knew I loved my wife even more happened.
41:25She said to me, why don't we FaceTime and I can show it to you?
41:33All jokes aside, isn't that the most romantic line?
41:37And then I thought, oh, Fifi, catch it, yeah.
41:39Okay.
41:42Why not?
41:42What?
41:43So she calls me on FaceTime.
41:45Now, I'm expecting my wife to be looking at the screen
41:48like she's always looking at the screen.
41:50This time...
41:52This time she's hovering over cat shit.
41:56I do not know this change of formation.
42:00So when I finally connect, I'm kind of looking at the screen like this.
42:04There's cat shit all over my phone.
42:06And then my face is in the top corner in the box.
42:13It's the weirdest thing ever.
42:16It looked like the emoji.
42:17You know, the poo emoji, the Bice one.
42:23Gets weirder.
42:24When I went back, she'd scooped it up and circled where the shit had taken place.
42:28As though I was going to do a CSI investigation.
42:32As though I was going to walk in and go...
42:35Ah, yeah, inconclusive.
42:38But I like Swedes.
42:40I like the way you are.
42:41I love the way you live.
42:42You know?
42:42I like the way you decide.
42:43Sometimes you decide.
42:44You know?
42:45You just go...
42:45You know?
42:46I'll tell you an example of this.
42:48September the 3rd, 1967.
42:51Remember...
42:51Remember that day?
42:52Anyone remember that day?
42:54Herge Trafiken.
42:55Remember this day?
42:57September the 3rd, 1967.
42:59Sweden just went,
43:00Fy fan, we're going to do something.
43:01I like that.
43:03Late 60s, a lot of things were happening.
43:05America was sending people to the moon.
43:07The Beatles were coming out of the UK.
43:10And Svarja went, fuck it.
43:11Let's get on the other side of the road.
43:17And...
43:22The government at the time, right?
43:23They asked you Swedes to vote on it.
43:2587% of Swedes said,
43:27Nah, we don't want to do it.
43:29The results went back and they went,
43:31You're doing it.
43:33And you guys went,
43:34Oh yeah, okay.
43:35Yeah-ha.
43:38That's why I love you people.
43:41September the 3rd was a Sunday.
43:44It was a Sunday.
43:45And you decided to do it at five o'clock in the morning.
43:47What a country this is.
43:50So they did it.
43:51And every car stopped.
43:53And there was quiet all over Svarja.
43:57And then this voice just went,
44:00Andra siden ani klara.
44:08And every Swede, no matter what, just went,
44:13You booed the first one and then you just drove off.
44:17What a country.
44:19I don't like driving here.
44:20I find it very freaky.
44:22It scares me.
44:22I'm always used to the left-hand side.
44:24You know?
44:25You know?
44:26Because I think you do that thing where,
44:27you know when you're driving here,
44:28you've got that kind of like...
44:29You know that noise?
44:30Feef.
44:31Ah, that noise.
44:33Why can't we have something just a bit more quieter?
44:36It's just like everything's going...
44:37Ah!
44:38I think that noise causes more accidents than accidents.
44:43You just...
44:44Why can't we go a bit smaller?
44:46A bit quieter?
44:48Like, shh.
44:48Oh, we've got some news.
44:49It's just...
44:50Ah!
44:52You kids okay there?
44:55Da da da da!
45:03That's alright.
45:06I like you.
45:07It's a good laugh.
45:08How squeezed in are you there?
45:09Yeah.
45:12What's your name?
45:13What's your name?
45:16Marianne.
45:17Marianne.
45:17You've got a headphone thing there.
45:19A headphone wire.
45:20Why is that?
45:23Are you a spy?
45:24Undercover?
45:26Excellent.
45:26I like that.
45:28And now the laughing stops.
45:29That's classic Sweden.
45:31I didn't pay for this shit.
45:32Leave me alone.
45:35I like listening to hip-hop.
45:37Leave it.
45:41But slowly, you know.
45:43Slowly.
45:4446 years of age.
45:45And I want to tell you something, right?
45:46The cat survived.
45:47You know, the cat...
45:49Survived.
45:50Don't freak out.
45:51Didn't die.
45:52People always ask me, you know.
45:54As a comedian, are you freaked out by death?
45:56Nah.
45:57You know?
45:58I grew up with death.
45:59My dad's not the grim reaper, but...
46:02My dad used to say some bizarre stuff to me.
46:05He used to say stuff like,
46:07If I get sick or ill, burn me.
46:14That was a lot to take for an eight-year-old, you know?
46:18Just sitting there, eating his flingor, you know?
46:21Oh yeah, okay.
46:24Finish my fru cost, and then I'll start the grill, you mad bastard.
46:31He's still alive now, right?
46:32But whenever I see him sneeze, I've always got, like, charcoal and matchsticks.
46:37So I've got, Papa, so I've got.
46:42But you can't fear death, can you?
46:44Five people a year dive sharks, do you know that?
46:46150 people dive coconuts on the head.
46:50Seventy-eight of those coconuts, thrown by sharks.
46:58Swedes have a different attitude to death, you know?
47:01I went to a funeral recently.
47:03I went to a funeral in, uh, in Linköping.
47:05Ninety-four-year-old man had passed away.
47:07And we were doing that, kind of, the lap thing that you guys do.
47:10We just walk around, like...
47:15I remember standing there by the coffin, and I was like...
47:19And then the wife of the husband, she came up to me, right?
47:22She was about 93.
47:23Wonderful little lady she is.
47:25She came up to me, she grabbed me by the arm, and she said,
47:28Don't be sad, be glad.
47:32I was like, Fyfan, do you know where you are here?
47:33What's going on?
47:36And she was like, nah, eh?
47:37And she said the most Swedish thing I've ever heard.
47:40She said,
47:40Don't be sad, be glad.
47:43It could be you in that box.
47:51I was like, Fyfan, you have moved on, sister.
47:56I think I saw her on Tinder during the hymns.
48:02But you have to be like that, you know?
48:04And as life goes on, I try and work out where I belong.
48:08Where is my home, you know?
48:09And I went to New Zealand recently.
48:12I took my kids.
48:13We went all the way to New Zealand.
48:15Has anyone been to New Zealand?
48:18Okay.
48:20No, New Zealand's a beautiful country, right?
48:22And we went there, and I took my kids there.
48:24And, you know, one of us dealt with a jet lag better than the other.
48:28And it was fantastic, you know?
48:30And New Zealand is a beautiful country, you know?
48:33And I remember walking along with my son.
48:36And I was holding his hand.
48:39And he was just looking around.
48:41It was like summer time there.
48:43And he said,
48:44Why don't we live here, Papa?
48:47And I said, Fyfan, that's a good question.
48:53But it made me think, you know?
48:55It made me think.
48:56It made me understand.
48:57Where do I belong, you know?
48:59And then I got back here, didn't I?
49:01I got back here.
49:02And I worked it out.
49:03I looked at New Zealand.
49:04I thought, ah, they've got place names, you know?
49:07Like...
49:07You know?
49:11I'm sure you'd know how to say that.
49:14And I thought, you know, what a great place.
49:16Maybe I should live there.
49:18Then you come back to Svary and you guys have got...
49:20You know?
49:24You know?
49:29Just like a little ship in the fog.
49:31You know?
49:34I moved here, moved here to Stockholm.
49:36That's the Stockholm logo,
49:37which I think is one of the most suspicious logos of all time.
49:41It's classic Stockholmers, isn't it?
49:42Just too bothered about other shit, you know?
49:46Not focusing on the conversation.
49:48Just looking over there.
49:58And, of course, it's difficult, you know?
50:00Like, living here, it's very...
50:01It's the biggest city, isn't it?
50:02You know?
50:03And we help.
50:04Obviously, we help the tourists.
50:06You know, when tourists come here, you give them this.
50:10The map of the tonobana.
50:13That helps, doesn't it?
50:15If anyone wants to get lost.
50:17They're like, okay,
50:18we're gonna have to kind of, like, bungee jump down here.
50:23And then we slide onto the pink line.
50:27It's the most confusing map of all time.
50:31You see tourists just looking at it like that.
50:38I love this, though.
50:39I love travelling.
50:41I love travelling around Svartia just for these moments.
50:44I just love it.
50:45You know, these seats are the greatest seats ever invented.
50:48I've only ever seen them in Sweden.
50:50You know, when you're really tired, you're like,
50:52Oh, Vifar, what a day.
50:53And then you just go,
50:54Oh.
50:57Oh.
50:59Oh, that's better.
51:01That's better.
51:03Tired.
51:04Not tired.
51:06Tired.
51:07Not tired.
51:09Little room-pa-pumpers.
51:14But you're helpful.
51:15That's what I like.
51:16You're helpful.
51:17Look at how helpful that is.
51:20If you can't understand the language,
51:24they'll give you information, information.
51:29Perfect.
51:31Won't tell you where it is,
51:33but just two different ways of saying information, information.
51:41This is brilliant.
51:42This is in Gothenburg.
51:44This is in Gothenburg.
51:46Just in case you forget,
51:47and you see that you missed the first sign.
51:50You know, if you missed the first one,
51:51you're like,
51:52Oh, Vifar, oh, there it is.
51:53Here.
51:55That was lucky.
51:57Named it twice, just in case.
52:02Awful.
52:02Saw this today.
52:03Varning for Halka.
52:04Two people had died, so.
52:07Awful.
52:09Terrible.
52:17Just Varning.
52:18Didn't see the sign.
52:20Then you go to Malmo.
52:22Have you been to Malmo?
52:22They do this in Malmo.
52:24No belongs.
52:24Inter belong.
52:25Inter belong!
52:28It's weird for me.
52:29I was on the train with four clowns.
52:31That was awkward for them.
52:33They just got off.
52:34They were like,
52:35What?
52:37Nah.
52:44Beautiful workforce there.
52:47We get it done.
52:48We get it done, Svariya.
52:50And then, what the?
52:54What's happening?
52:56What country has to lock their bins?
53:00Who takes a bin home?
53:03You're not going to believe I've got,
53:05I've got for you.
53:07Good yule!
53:08Good yule!
53:13This was fantastic.
53:15This was in Malmo as well.
53:16Guy with a bike helmet and the bike still in the box.
53:21What a beautiful human being that is.
53:24Just in case the police pull him over.
53:28Still in the box.
53:29You've got your helmet on.
53:30That's alright.
53:30Health and safety.
53:32Went to Yonsherping.
53:33We took the tour there.
53:34Yonsherping commune.
53:35That was great.
53:35I don't know if you've seen their opening hours.
53:37Monday to Friday, 7.45 to 5 o'clock.
53:40But June, July, August.
53:41Monday to Friday, 8 o'clock till 5!
53:46FEE FAN!
53:49They've given themselves an extra 15.
53:54They're waking up during June, July and August.
53:57They're like, oh, FEE FAN, I'm tired.
53:59The alarm's gone off.
54:01I've got to go.
54:02They're like, nay, Ingrid.
54:04You've got an extra 15.
54:06Hit the snooze button.
54:08Enjoy yourself.
54:18What a treat.
54:21That caused a lot of trouble.
54:27Didn't know if I was going up or down.
54:29It was awful.
54:31And then you get this one.
54:33This one.
54:33FEE FAN!
54:35You've got to make the decision.
54:39Don't you?
54:39You have to make the decision.
54:41FEE FAN!
54:45Yeah!
54:49What I thought I would do
54:51was end this show
54:53on a story about how I belong
54:56and where I belong.
54:58And I put it into a soft rap song.
55:04Kick it.
55:06Svaria, I want to tell you something true
55:08and how much I love you.
55:10I will never get used to your nudity
55:13and getting out my snoppers.
55:17I would rather go to a bacalucaloppers.
55:20I think this country rocks.
55:23You say shit like, don't be sad.
55:25It could be you in that box.
55:28Sing it.
55:30Sing it!
55:38Yeah, yeah, remix it.
55:41Because I want to prata svenska.
55:44But every time I try,
55:45my kids come up and they're like,
55:47honey garland,
55:48please prata the engliska.
55:49But I'll keep trying.
55:51At the moment,
55:52my svenska sounds a lot like cat bass.
55:55Oh, yo, yo.
55:58Oh, yo, yo.
56:00Oh, yo, yo.
56:02Oh, yo, yo.
56:04Oh, yo, yo.
56:05Oh, yo, yo.
56:05Oh, yo, yo.
56:05Oh, yo, yo.
56:06I want to tell you Svaria
56:08why you are absolutely great.
56:10I think it's because you eat everything
56:12with a piece of pin cake.
56:14You've made me feel valcommon.
56:16You've made me feel like I could fit.
56:18So what I did,
56:20I applied for Swedish citizenship.
56:22I sent it away.
56:24And after anxious months of waiting,
56:28I got the letter back.
56:30I read it.
56:31It said rejected.
56:33But then I read it again.
56:35FIFA.
56:35I was accepted.
56:38Oh, yo, yo.
56:40Yeah.
56:43Oh, yo, yo.
56:45Yeah.
56:45Oh, yo, yo.
56:48Oh, yo, yo.
56:51Yeah.
56:52Oh, yo, yo.
56:53Oh, yo, yo.
56:59Oh, yo, yo.
57:02Oh, yo, yo.
57:04Oh, yo, yo.
57:04Sing it.
57:04Oh, yo, yo.
57:06Oh, yo, yo.
57:10Oh, yo, yo.
57:12Oh, yo, yo.
57:13Oh, yo, yo.
57:14Oh, yo, yo.
57:14Oh, yo, yo.
57:16Oh, yo, yo.
57:16Oh, yo, yo.
57:16All of you from me, thank you.
57:20Take care, K-Daw!
57:46Oi, oi, oi, oi, oi, oi, oi, oi, oi, oi, oi, oi, oi, oi, oi, oi, oi, oi, oi, oi,
58:02oi, oi, oi, oi, oi, oi, oi, oi, oi, oi, oi, oi, oi, oi, oi, oi, oi, oi, oi, oi,
58:02oi, oi, oi, oi, oi, oi, oi, oi, oi, oi, oi, oi, oi, oi, oi, oi, oi, oi, oi, oi,
58:04oi, oi, oi, oi, oi, oi, oi, oi, oi, oi, oi, oi, oi, oi, oi
58:14Tux and Rickets!
58:18Thank you to all of you.
58:20It means so much that you come to this show.
58:22I'll see you soon again.
58:24Hey, door, and happy, happy days to you.
58:27Puss-puss!
58:43Puss-puss!
58:44Puss and Rickets
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