SWAPPED BODIES WITH MY SECRET CRUSH - FULL MOVIE
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Short filmTranscript
00:00:01Bolt.
00:00:02This experiment needs to be perfect.
00:00:06What you should be worried about, Denise, is who's taking you to prom.
00:00:09That's tomorrow night, just in case you forgot.
00:00:11Let me use this amulet to manifest the perfect man.
00:00:16Those crystals are ridiculous.
00:00:30Listen up, I got something to say.
00:00:32They work!
00:00:33Well, well.
00:00:34If it isn't dorky, Denise and her little science projects.
00:00:38Oh, make yourself useful, hold this.
00:00:43Nope.
00:00:44No, that wasn't it.
00:00:46All right here.
00:00:51Ah, got him again.
00:00:53It's too easy.
00:00:54Look, the pool's closed today, okay?
00:00:55So we gotta use the gym for some dry land drills.
00:00:57Tomorrow is swim team captain trials and I gotta be in tip-top shape.
00:01:00So?
00:01:01Can't get any of your nerd on me, you know what I mean?
00:01:03So? You two should make like a tree and get out of here.
00:01:07All muscle, no brains.
00:01:09What'd you say to him?
00:01:10Look, Billy, the science lab's leaking, so we need to be in here.
00:01:13Do I look like I care?
00:01:14Is that alien vomit?
00:01:17Hey, hey, hey, hey!
00:01:18Don't touch that, it's a very delicate compound!
00:01:20Oh, it's so delicate!
00:01:21You're kidding, you should hand it over to me, my guy.
00:01:22Seriously, get your beautiful manly hands off of that.
00:01:25Well, now the gym is actually mine, Denise!
00:01:26No, it's my lab!
00:01:28Fine, have it!
00:01:30No!
00:01:35Oh!
00:01:49Oh my god, Denise!
00:01:52I told you you can't get any of your nerd on me. Oh, you're so gonna regret this. Hey, relax
00:01:57guys
00:01:58Mercury's in retrograde and it's making us act like a bunch of deranged flamingos. Fine
00:02:03But I'm gonna remember this. She's such a jerk. Oh, you such a jerk. Oh
00:02:08Bye Denise
00:02:10The only reason you make so much fun of her is because you were obviously in love with her
00:02:18Denise wait
00:02:21Bro, I got it all on my camera. No way
00:02:24Let's see. Oh my god. Oh my god. This is embarrassing. She's gonna probably be alone her entire life her
00:02:35and her
00:02:35950 cats. I was looking for you all day
00:02:39Okay, I'm effing humiliated
00:02:41No one likes me. That's not true Denise. I like you. You don't get it. I mean look at you
00:02:47You're handsome. You're cool. You've been at school for like six years
00:03:19Everyone likes you. It's been seven years
00:03:22Incoming!
00:03:26Incoming!
00:03:27Paris! Lights out!
00:03:30Denise
00:03:32I'm about to make all your wishes come true
00:03:34I wish I wasn't such a nerd
00:03:37I'm so glad I'm not a nerd
00:03:48I'm so glad I'm not a nerd
00:04:23Oh my god
00:04:27Oh my god
00:04:34No, no, no, no.
00:04:36We swap bodies!
00:04:37We're building!
00:04:38We swap bodies!
00:04:39We're building!
00:05:04It just doesn't make sense to me.
00:05:08What the hell did you do to me?
00:05:10Me?
00:05:10I didn't do anything.
00:05:11In fact, I think that this is all your fault!
00:05:14You need to change me back right now!
00:05:16I don't think I can live the rest of my life with these things!
00:05:19Okay, what did you...
00:05:21Where did you even dig up those heels? Those are my grandma's.
00:05:24I think they're cute.
00:05:26Cute?
00:05:27They're so tall.
00:05:28I've never worn those a day in my life.
00:05:30If I want to go to the beach naked, it's my life.
00:05:33100%.
00:05:33What are you doing, Tracy?
00:05:35Billy!
00:05:36Hey, babe.
00:05:40Why are you dressed like it's Halloween?
00:05:42Maybe a kiss will bring you back to your senses.
00:05:47Um...
00:05:48Hold that thought.
00:05:50We need to talk.
00:05:51Like, right now.
00:05:57Excuse me.
00:05:58Did my own boyfriend just refuse to kiss me?
00:06:00He's always such a horndog.
00:06:01Maybe he got neutered.
00:06:06You're changing us back right now!
00:06:08Okay, don't panic!
00:06:09It's obviously just an electrical transference of quantum...
00:06:11Not!
00:06:11God, speak English!
00:06:13Please!
00:06:13Okay, something obviously happened that slammed us out of our bodies and into each other's.
00:06:16Okay, so we need to slam ourselves back together.
00:06:19Hypothetically speaking, yes.
00:06:20But how?
00:06:20Like this.
00:06:21Oh God!
00:06:26Oh God!
00:06:28Oh, fire!
00:06:30Fire!
00:06:31Fire!
00:06:31Fire!
00:06:33Fire!
00:06:33Fire Billy!
00:06:34Fire!
00:06:34Go!
00:06:34Go!
00:06:39Ah!
00:06:40Ah!
00:06:41Ah!
00:06:41Ah!
00:06:41Ah!
00:06:41The door's locked!
00:06:42Oh my God!
00:06:44We're gonna die in here!
00:06:45Oh my God!
00:06:45Stop being such a drama queen!
00:06:47It's literally just the trauma.
00:06:48It's not!
00:06:49It's gonna burn the whole school down!
00:06:50We're gonna die in here!
00:06:51Oh my God!
00:06:52Oh no!
00:06:59Oh no!
00:07:01Oh no!
00:07:01Oh no!
00:07:01Oh no!
00:07:02Oh no!
00:07:02Oh no!
00:07:04Oh no!
00:07:04Oh no!
00:07:05Oh no!
00:07:06Oh no!
00:07:09This is unbelievable!
00:07:10Mr. Miller!
00:07:12Ms. Weiner!
00:07:13My office!
00:07:14Now!
00:07:36I've heard about the trouble YouTube been causing for the last few days.
00:07:39It's his fault!
00:07:40It's her fault!
00:07:41Excuse me!
00:07:42Nothing.
00:07:43Nothing.
00:07:44Now!
00:07:45Since you two single handedly destroyed the prom, you're gonna redecorate it.
00:07:49I hate the prom.
00:07:50And decorating's like girl stuff.
00:07:53Which I love to do because I am a girl.
00:07:57If you two don't do as I say and spend all day long fixing the prom, you will be expelled.
00:08:02I can't do that today, okay? I have a science test that's worth half of my grade.
00:08:06And I have swim trials after school to find out who becomes swim team captain.
00:08:09I mean Denise does.
00:08:11I don't know what's wrong with you two.
00:08:13And I really don't care.
00:08:14But if I see you separated for anything other than class and to fix the prom, you are out of
00:08:19my school.
00:08:20Got it?
00:08:24I asked you two a question!
00:08:27Yes.
00:08:28Yes, Principal Rainmaker.
00:08:29Good.
00:08:30Now shake hands for the start of a beautiful new relationship.
00:08:41Shake hands!
00:08:43Now get out of my office!
00:08:46Now!
00:08:53Okay.
00:09:04You did this on purpose! You just know I'm uber popular and you're so uncool!
00:09:09Oh well if I had the power to do that then I would use it for something better
00:09:12than you! You need to put us back together! Oh my god, you're right. We need glue.
00:09:18We need glue! Okay um yeah no not that type of glue I'm talking about a quantum
00:09:28glue a transference of matter that'll generate a- Stop speaking nerd-ernese!
00:09:33Um if we were to hug then our brains might release oxytocin which is the bonding
00:09:38chemical and that could reset our energy fields. You want me to hug you? For
00:09:43scientific purposes only don't get too excited. I'm sure you're the excited one.
00:09:47I know you've always had a crush on me. Okay no I've actually never had a crush
00:09:50on you. But I totally do have a crush on him. I just can't let him find out!
00:09:58Okay don't make it weird. Come here bro. I'm gonna- I'm gonna approach. I'm gonna- I'm gonna go
00:10:04-
00:10:04Okay. Okay nice!
00:10:23Nope! I still have the wrong reproductive appendage. Well clearly he's excited. And it's called a dick. I'd like to
00:10:29have it back please.
00:10:30Oh you think I like being stuck with this thing between my legs? How do you make it go down?
00:10:35Think of dead puppies. Or Miss Chadwick the English teacher naked. Oh. Oh. Ew.
00:10:41See? Now don't you have one of those like science experiments that you can change us back?
00:10:46Swim trails are today and promised tonight and my girlfriend is counting on me to show up as me!
00:10:50Okay stop yelling at me!
00:10:51Who else am I supposed to yell at any-
00:10:52I don't know! Not me!
00:10:54Oh!
00:10:56Oh!
00:10:57Ah!
00:10:58Ah!
00:11:00Ah!
00:11:00Ah!
00:11:03Ah!
00:11:04Ah!
00:11:06You hit me!
00:11:07I did.
00:11:08And I'm a girl!
00:11:10I'm sorry. Can I s-
00:11:11You look okay.
00:11:13Now who's the bully?
00:11:15Okay. I'm sorry.
00:11:18Let's just move on from this okay? We can worry about trying to swap our bodies back after we finish
00:11:23decorating for the prom. Seriously, I- I cannot be expelled.
00:11:27Fine.
00:11:28Well just start with the palm trees.
00:11:32Oh.
00:11:39Excuse me.
00:11:43Okay. Palm trees.
00:11:52What are you doing? Why are you painting it before I've even cut it out?
00:11:55Cause it's a palm tree so we need to paint it first then we cut it out.
00:11:57Well that wasn't clear.
00:11:58Oh well you weren't clear.
00:11:59Why am I getting so much backlash?
00:12:01Why are you offended by everything?
00:12:02I just want clear direction!
00:12:07Is that clear enough for you?
00:12:14Crystal.
00:12:15Oh.
00:12:18!!!!
00:12:19Oh".
00:12:20Time goes!
00:12:22We'll be asking for sale
00:12:24We made the rules, it's stupid
00:12:26This is our world, that's the way it works
00:12:29And you're never gonna run, that's cause I'm gonna be fair
00:12:32Some boys, they act to love, we're confident
00:12:38So girls, let's make them wait for hide and dead
00:12:42Some games will drop too much back
00:12:45Oh no! It's my favorite jersey!
00:12:47Take it off so we can walk it!
00:12:52Yeah, turn it up
00:12:54Push it back, push it back
00:12:56Throw a stab, throw a stab
00:12:57Throw a stab, throw a stab
00:13:01Enough! Enough!
00:13:02No more games
00:13:04We gotta...
00:13:06Okay, we gotta finish this up before we get stuck
00:13:10Be careful, it's a little slip
00:13:11Oh, thanks!
00:13:28Thank you
00:13:28Thank you
00:13:30You know that chemical reaction you said we need to change back?
00:13:35Maybe it had to be something stronger than a hug
00:13:39What's stronger than a hug?
00:13:41A kiss
00:13:43You wanna kiss me?
00:13:44If it'll change us back, it's worth a try
00:13:48Yeah, I guess that theorem checks out
00:13:51Okay, so we'll kiss
00:13:54Ready?
00:13:56Ready?
00:13:57Set?
00:13:59Set
00:14:04Set
00:14:05And here we go
00:14:06Here we go
00:14:31we're done find a new problem date
00:14:38you got me dumped okay i mean it's just fix it
00:14:44ow where are you going get my life back well if principal raymaker finds out that we're not
00:14:48working together we're gonna be expelled
00:15:05honey what don't touch me you nerd nightmare honey please this is a huge mistake why do you keep calling
00:15:11me honey
00:15:11okay i'm a whore for homework vixen please just hear me out vixen vixen stop stop
00:15:29stop you've done enough damage already wow how does it feel to be the nerd
00:15:39so you're not into denise get real vixen do you really think that i would cheat on you with her
00:15:47philly i know you used to love me oh i'll still go to film with you
00:15:51no no what is my makeup smooth i know you hate it when i'm not perfect
00:15:55um eva
00:15:57um
00:16:02you know what billy you have bossed everyone around for years
00:16:08now you get to know what it's like to be on the other side
00:16:10you can't just leave me here we were ordered to work together
00:16:12yeah you had no problem leaving me
00:16:17yeah maybe now you'll appreciate me a little more
00:16:20okay
00:16:21let's go
00:16:23okay just just just walk
00:16:32hey
00:16:32billy it turns me on when you put other girls in their place
00:16:35oh wow that's cool um hey why don't we go to class
00:16:42shh
00:16:43not until i think
00:16:48i really don't think a thank you is necessary but okay
00:16:51ah here and you're gonna go right there
00:16:55um
00:16:55what what's wrong with you billy don't be scared
00:16:58i just don't feel myself
00:17:00what's up brother why is it you're not up
00:17:07oh i uh
00:17:09i what i
00:17:11i have to
00:17:13fly my kite
00:17:17what
00:17:17i'm gonna be back
00:17:19what is wrong with you
00:17:23why is he running like a girl
00:17:25move
00:17:27loser
00:17:32oh
00:17:32oh
00:17:37excuse me
00:17:38excuse me
00:17:39excuse me
00:17:39sorry
00:17:39i need your help
00:17:41please
00:17:42help with what?
00:17:43beating up freshmen?
00:17:43bullying is so pre-pandemic billy
00:17:46i have to decorate for the prom or i'm gonna get expelled
00:17:47but you are billy
00:17:49no
00:17:50no no no i'm denise
00:17:52i'm your best friend
00:17:53oh please
00:17:55i'm serious
00:17:56billy and i
00:17:58we swapped bodies last night
00:18:03billy i was willing to listen to you but instead you come to me lying with this ridiculous story
00:18:14i'm being serious
00:18:17okay vixen literally just tried to make out with me i've only been a guy for like two hours and
00:18:21i'm already a complainant
00:18:22total slut
00:18:23of course vixen tried to make out with you
00:18:25she's your girlfriend
00:18:27remember
00:18:27but you're not listening to me okay
00:18:29i still can't believe i woke up with this thing between my legs
00:18:34oh in all seriousness though like how do you pee without accidentally hosing yourself in the face cause i cannot
00:18:38figure it out
00:18:38it'll look early to be talking about penile control with you okay
00:18:41okay look look look look look
00:18:43maybe maybe
00:18:45if i just show you it like you can help me figure this thing out cause i do not know
00:18:48how it works
00:18:48oh my god
00:18:49oh my god
00:18:51i don't have any other pudding it's bad
00:18:56so
00:18:57are you kidding me
00:18:59bull
00:19:00god
00:19:00sorry
00:19:01no
00:19:03why would you hit me
00:19:05nice try
00:19:05but i'm not falling for the look at your drunk prank you pulled on me in eighth grade
00:19:10what
00:19:11i didn't know that
00:19:12did billy bullied you
00:19:14stop pretending you're denise
00:19:17actually
00:19:19he's not pretending
00:19:21or
00:19:22she's not pretending
00:19:24and
00:19:25yes
00:19:26you're right
00:19:27i did bully you
00:19:28a lot actually
00:19:30and i'm sorry
00:19:31wait wait what
00:19:32it's all true
00:19:33we swapped bodies
00:19:34and this happened last night
00:19:36when i woke up
00:19:37i had these
00:19:40this is vision
00:19:41i mean oh my god like i knew i had sick powers but i didn't know i could do something
00:19:43like this
00:19:44this is so badass
00:19:44this is
00:19:45this is epic
00:19:46this is
00:19:47wait i did i did what
00:19:52whoa
00:19:52oh my god buddy
00:19:54easy buddy
00:19:54just breathe
00:19:55just breathe
00:19:56oh my god
00:19:57baby has like low blood sugar or something
00:19:59should we get him a cookie
00:20:00juice
00:20:00no juice is better
00:20:01juice is better
00:20:02juice
00:20:03excuse me borrowing that
00:20:05oh my god
00:20:05i got your juice
00:20:07here you go here comes the juice
00:20:09open up
00:20:10open up
00:20:11open up
00:20:11there it is
00:20:12i'm not a diabetic
00:20:14i'm just
00:20:14in shock
00:20:15you weirdos
00:20:16bolt
00:20:18what did you mean by
00:20:19oh no
00:20:20what did i do
00:20:21i maybe made a little wish
00:20:23upon a star
00:20:24and uh
00:20:25this amulet
00:20:31what kind of wish
00:20:33what kind of wish
00:20:34a wish that would help all denise's wishes come true
00:20:37if you don't unwish this wish right now i am going to rearrange your face
00:20:43we are serious bolt
00:20:45ok
00:20:46you're our only hope here
00:20:48i mean this is crazy
00:20:49i'm like
00:20:49the real harry potter
00:20:51just with abs
00:20:51magic isn't real
00:20:52how dare you
00:20:53science was actually mistaken for magic for like centuries
00:20:56so um
00:20:56yeah actually it is a possibility
00:20:58damn right it is
00:20:59you know what
00:21:00i can fix this
00:21:01i can fix this
00:21:02we just need ingredients
00:21:04he's serious isn't he
00:21:06you got a better idea
00:21:09let's go
00:21:11i mean the silver fork for focus
00:21:15hot sauce for package
00:21:16did he say hot dog
00:21:19oatmeal for balance
00:21:22and uh pancakes
00:21:23he said how many pancakes
00:21:24we need pancakes for protection
00:21:27alright hold on you two
00:21:29cause i'm about to put you back where you truly belong
00:21:31hot dog-us
00:21:33pancake-us
00:21:34ketchup-us
00:21:35mustard-us
00:21:36sugar we're going down down down
00:21:38by the power of carbs and chaos
00:21:40but turn these souls to their natural vessels
00:21:44it's working
00:21:50it's working
00:21:51i'm doing magic
00:21:53it's working
00:22:07this doesn't look like decorating to me
00:22:08you have ten seconds to explain yourself or this will be your last thing at high to high
00:22:14principal raymaker it's a total misunderstanding
00:22:16boat
00:22:16i didn't know you'd be here
00:22:18well i am
00:22:19and i'm a sorcerer
00:22:20you see all the wind i created
00:22:22first off
00:22:23you don't lost your rabbit ass mind
00:22:24get off my table
00:22:25and the ventilation system is being reinstalled
00:22:28that is the ac
00:22:29oh
00:22:30oh
00:22:31so i can't do magic
00:22:33i'm
00:22:33principal raymaker
00:22:34um
00:22:34we
00:22:35actually
00:22:36were
00:22:36decorating for prom
00:22:37we
00:22:38we just expanded our team
00:22:40to include bolt
00:22:41for his uh
00:22:42his
00:22:43styling expertise of course
00:22:47delegation
00:22:48good
00:22:49keep it up
00:22:51oh
00:22:52oh
00:22:52who else
00:22:58so that spell you did was fake
00:23:00i swear i thought it was working
00:23:01i mean
00:23:02maybe we shouldn't use culinary products next time
00:23:04okay
00:23:05both
00:23:06you have to switch us back
00:23:09uh oh
00:23:11uh oh
00:23:12what do you mean uh oh
00:23:13i feel something weird
00:23:14down here
00:23:15oh no
00:23:17oh no
00:23:18billy
00:23:18i think
00:23:19oh no
00:23:20i think i'm about to have my
00:23:22i'm about to have your technically mine but it's in your
00:23:24i'm about to have oh my god
00:23:26no
00:23:28welcome to the wonderful world of being a woman
00:23:36okay relax relax
00:23:38it's not my time of the month so you probably just have to pee
00:23:41i haven't done that yet
00:23:42you haven't peed all day
00:23:44i wanted to be respectful and not look at you down there
00:23:47oh
00:23:47well that's kind of sweet
00:23:49um
00:23:51well there's a there's a bathroom down the hall that you can use if you want to um
00:23:54i would go
00:23:55and we'll meet up after class
00:23:57all the sitting down
00:24:00how do you girls do it
00:24:03i'd be sitting down sometimes
00:24:14i'd be sitting down sometimes
00:24:15eww
00:24:15well wow
00:24:16look who it is
00:24:17a piece of shit coming in to take a shit
00:24:19it's great
00:24:21to
00:24:21bother you
00:24:22i just
00:24:22i just need to use the bathroom
00:24:27you're not going anywhere
00:24:29please let me go
00:24:30if you need to pee
00:24:31pee
00:24:33or is it that time of the month
00:24:34need a tampon
00:24:37maybe you need another one
00:24:38maybe you need another one
00:24:42hey girls
00:24:42vixen i know you're nice
00:24:44i am nice
00:24:45to people i like
00:24:48trying to steal my boyfriend
00:24:55this will teach you to mess with my man you science crap psycho
00:25:02i think you need a few more
00:25:06we gotta get to class
00:25:08one sec
00:25:09look
00:25:10really again
00:25:11and you won't walk out of here alive
00:25:27oh my
00:25:28jeez
00:25:29billy
00:25:30what are you
00:25:30doing
00:25:32oh my god
00:25:33what the hell happened to me
00:25:34my girlfriend just beat the crap out of me
00:25:37because she thought i was you
00:25:38trying to steal you
00:25:39from me
00:25:41for
00:25:41her
00:25:44you
00:25:45what
00:25:46vixen actually bullied me
00:25:47obviously
00:25:48she always bullies me
00:25:49i'm sorry she always bullies you
00:25:50but please
00:25:51help me
00:25:52i couldn't go to class
00:25:53you skipped my math class
00:25:54you don't expect me to walk into class looking like this
00:25:56maybe it's time for you to get a little bit of payback
00:25:58if you don't help me
00:25:59and drop this attitude
00:26:02i'll drop this blouse
00:26:05what
00:26:05i'll go streaking across campus
00:26:07and then we'll see if the stripper of Heiser High gets into college
00:26:11you wouldn't
00:26:17you
00:26:18you're bluffing
00:26:20two
00:26:22billy
00:26:22you think about this
00:26:23you don't actually want to do this
00:26:24billy
00:26:24three
00:26:25you don't
00:26:25oh my god no
00:26:27No, no, no! Stop! Stop! Stop! Stop!
00:26:29Okay? You win. Okay?
00:26:31I will help you. Let's just...
00:26:32Let's get you away from everybody and speed back up.
00:26:37Thank you so much.
00:26:39Out of your mind, Billy.
00:26:41Look, I didn't know how mean my friends could be until I was on the other side of it.
00:26:48I'm sorry.
00:26:50Whatever.
00:26:51Let's just maybe go decorate for the prom, I guess.
00:26:54Come on in condition. Come back.
00:26:57Stop acting like grades are all you got, man.
00:27:00Grades are all that I've got.
00:27:01You could be anything you want to be. Prom queen, student council, literally anything.
00:27:08Yeah, sure. Maybe in an alternate dimension.
00:27:10We are in an alternate dimension.
00:27:12Look, you got brains and beauty. Something Vixen and all the other girls are so jealous of.
00:27:17Yeah, they're actually jealous of me?
00:27:19Yes! I mean...
00:27:21Why have you been hiding this body? God.
00:27:24Yeah?
00:27:25Okay, well, it's not like I'm hiding something.
00:27:27See this?
00:27:29Yes, you have.
00:27:31No.
00:27:32Come on, feel it.
00:27:33What? Oh my god, no!
00:27:34That kind of touching is totally inappropriate.
00:27:36Bro, it's literally your body I'm trying to get you to appreciate.
00:27:43Okay, I just... I guess I've never, like, saw myself as...
00:27:49Sexy?
00:27:51It's just not respectable to be valued only for your looks. Okay, real beauty, it's on the inside.
00:27:57Stop being such a prude and go with it.
00:28:03Okay.
00:28:10Okay, I guess I am kind of fat.
00:28:11You're gorgeous.
00:28:14Looking this good isn't vanity. It's power. Maybe I could show you how to use it.
00:28:34We're just...
00:28:36We're just doing an anatomy lesson.
00:28:39Yeah, I was wondering where my kidneys were. I think they're in here, right?
00:28:42Yep, right there.
00:28:43Perfect. Thanks for the lesson.
00:28:44my spell really did work you two really are falling in love no we're not no we're not sure
00:28:53then why are you playing doctor on the football field and why is denise so busted my girlfriend
00:29:00just beat the out of me please tell me a better clothes for me to change into did you check
00:29:05the
00:29:05lost and found is there's some pretty good in there i can glam you two up later thanks
00:29:11oh and one small detail to add some more pressure to your day we have our driving
00:29:17test after school in the back parking lot during a study break oh good luck driving test i can't drive
00:29:31what
00:29:41lighter but we don't fight yeah that's a fact
00:29:53that awesome found box really saved the day huh
00:29:57i look amazing don't i yeah the category's called britney bitch
00:30:12this is a bad idea people drive cars every day get in it's not that difficult
00:30:20bull get in no no no i'm not dying today bull come on i need you just in case he
00:30:25kills us yeah i took
00:30:26driver's ed with billy before and the uh instructor he's still in therapy get your pretty boy butt in the
00:30:32car
00:30:32and strap yourself
00:30:47i can't take this billy billy billy get back here
00:30:54both right i suck if you're seriously sorry about all the bullying you've done over these years then
00:30:59you will do this for me i cannot drive to school in my mom's station wagon for another year everyone
00:31:04already thinks i'm a big enough nerd as it is god you're not a nerd you're actually kind of cool
00:31:19so this is how i died today my dad's convertible was upholstery shut up not used to this car yet
00:31:44okay
00:31:44yep we're clear it's all clear okay move out gently
00:31:51okay
00:32:03my grandma drives faster than this and she's dead
00:32:14why did we stop the car was parking because we're in a parking lot
00:32:18okay do you see that that right there that spot yeah go parking
00:32:24parallel parking what the fuck no that's my weak spot man listen to him
00:32:32you've got this my faith in you
00:32:44oh my god stop oh my god
00:32:47billy stop stop stop
00:32:53okay i think that's enough driving lessons for today dear diary today i almost died from vehicular
00:32:59manslaughter you tried your best billy that's all that matters you're not disappointed in me
00:33:08no no no you're okay at my book i'll repay you for this
00:33:17no one's ever gonna bully you again
00:33:23i'm gonna run for prom queen
00:33:25oh and you're gonna win
00:33:28what what no billy no no no billy you can't do this billy
00:33:38i like that he's pushing you out of your comfort zone but he's trying to turn me into somebody that
00:33:43i'm not someone that's confident attractive someone who's actually trying to have fun tragic
00:33:48are you actually taking billy's side right now what's the worst that's going to happen i lose
00:33:52everybody hates me sweetheart besides me everyone already does hate you oh thanks oh all right
00:33:59come on we gotta get to class lucky for you it's with me what what class drink history no it's
00:34:06my
00:34:06favorite one of the day d ever take a shower with a group of boys it's fun you're gonna love
00:34:13it i'll see
00:34:30you there
00:34:31hey what's up kitty hey we should play a game called find each other's locker i found yours
00:34:40where's mine we do not have time for it's 25 mic come on get your act together
00:34:46thanks kenny nailed it i cannot stop itching look at this oh it's plastic fungal overgrowth of the
00:34:56inguinal region um tinea curis tinea who jock itch okay you need anti-fungal cream everywhere like
00:35:09now okay when did you get so smart it's almost like you got another brain
00:35:18you're welcome kenny thanks man
00:35:24ladies this is pe not home ec i want those clothes off those speedos on and your grizzly butts in
00:35:30that
00:35:30pool in uh one minute
00:35:34miller swim trials on the day i want you to be the new team captain yeah miller yeah
00:35:46you got it coach
00:35:48all right guys we're gonna dance on uh three yeah yeah all right one two three
00:35:53bananas
00:35:54here we go
00:36:17okay my little mermaids let's see if you're as bad as you look
00:36:23time to get in the pool on your mark
00:36:30get set
00:36:38you don't practice now you're gonna drown with the trials
00:36:42okay well please don't make me do this i i can't i can't swim
00:36:46all right we can think of something else really nope
00:36:58oh you're the worst i hate you listen i'm gonna hypnotize you okay
00:37:02billy's body is gonna be used to the water
00:37:04water on two on two on two into what out two into out two out two out two there you
00:37:11go
00:37:12all right now you're gonna swim yeah there you go i'm good now we're gonna get to the end of
00:37:20the
00:37:20pool it's gonna be stroke glide and breathe down there yes okay you got it you're gonna stroke
00:37:27okay glide and breathe okay go ahead and kick all right give it a run
00:37:36i'm good kick kumbayaba two
00:37:41i'm swimming let's go really
00:37:45i'm swimming you got it keep it up it's into out two there you go good job
00:38:01oh my god it's winning i grew up so fast
00:38:11hey hi's or hi bananas
00:38:14denise for prom queen denise for prom
00:38:29i would never vote for you oh you will unless you want everyone to find out about your little
00:38:37date with the vacuum cleaner
00:38:40it never happened welcome weasel it was only one it was only how do you know about that oh vote
00:38:48for
00:38:48me and no one else will
00:38:55and that goes for the rest of you like paul and his stepmom pics
00:38:59for rj and his little uh make-out sex with the mascot
00:39:03oh thank you thank you one at a time guys oh you're all disgusting
00:39:12i love you
00:39:23oh my god billy johnny
00:39:25billy johnny somebody grab a lifesaver i got a coach
00:39:38billy billy johnny
00:39:51billy johnny
00:39:53oh my god
00:39:55oh
00:39:58oh
00:40:27I'm not letting either of us drown.
00:40:30Hey!
00:40:33When the tarnation is going on over here, get up.
00:40:36You want an invitation? Get up!
00:40:40I wanna know, why is Miller not smelling like Miller?
00:40:43And this little girl got in that pool with no swimsuit and no training.
00:40:48Answer me!
00:40:49I can explain. Mercury's in retrograde, so...
00:40:52Bolt, I do not have time for your astrological bullshit right now.
00:40:56But it's true, the gravitational pull is just distorting perception,
00:40:58so it made it look like Denise is actually better than Pilly.
00:41:01I saw these two with my own eyes!
00:41:04But your chart says that you're ruled by Neptune,
00:41:08which is the planet of confusion.
00:41:10You see?
00:41:12You also got a lot of love and desires coming your way, Coach Finland, so...
00:41:17Love?
00:41:18Yeah?
00:41:19For me?
00:41:22Aquarius, like rain, like a ray maker.
00:41:24Oh, yes.
00:41:25Me? And her?
00:41:27That big bat!
00:41:28That's really straight of you.
00:41:31Alright, you two, meet me in the gym.
00:41:35Now?
00:41:40Hey.
00:41:41Um, your clothes should be pretty dry.
00:41:44Now.
00:41:45Sorry that you got all wet.
00:41:47I'm sorry I got you in it this mess.
00:41:49It's, it's all good.
00:41:50I mean, I really should learn how to swim, so...
00:41:52Thank you again for saving me.
00:41:54Alright, you two, we got a prom to decorate.
00:41:56I don't want you all to get expelled now.
00:41:58I like you too much.
00:42:02You're alright.
00:42:05He's right.
00:42:07You're actually a lot cooler than I thought you were.
00:42:10Thanks, I think.
00:42:13You're not too bad yourself, you know?
00:42:15You're actually pretty funny.
00:42:16And you're like way smarter than I thought you were.
00:42:19And you're really cute.
00:42:21And like a, like a socially acceptable, like, like in a subjective sort of way.
00:42:26Never mind.
00:42:27No, no.
00:42:28I feel the same way.
00:42:33You do.
00:42:35Yeah.
00:42:37I do.
00:42:40Cool.
00:42:45Um.
00:42:47Prom.
00:42:48Yeah.
00:42:49Prom.
00:42:51Yeah.
00:42:54Who are you?
00:42:54Who are you?
00:42:54Who are you even going with anyway?
00:42:56I'm...
00:42:57I'm not going, actually.
00:42:59Why not?
00:43:01Do you want to?
00:43:02Honestly, not really.
00:43:04I think I'd rather just stay at home and like watch football or something.
00:43:07No, no, no.
00:43:08I'm...
00:43:09Like, do you want to go to prom with me?
00:43:15Denise, you know I have a girlfriend.
00:43:18Yeah.
00:43:19Yes.
00:43:20Yes, I do.
00:43:21Vixen.
00:43:22Yeah.
00:43:23Um.
00:43:25And she's great, by the way.
00:43:28I'm...
00:43:28Gonna...
00:43:29I'm just...
00:43:30Gonna meet up with you.
00:43:31And I'm gonna see you soon.
00:43:32Okay, we're just gonna...
00:43:33We'll stay.
00:43:34Okay.
00:43:37Was she serious about asking me to prom?
00:43:39Lucky boy.
00:43:40She's never asked a guy to pass assault.
00:43:42Other than prom.
00:43:44Yeah, she was serious.
00:43:47Let's go, Slugger.
00:43:49Let's go, Slugger.
00:44:15Vic...
00:44:16Vic...
00:44:16Vic...
00:44:16Vic...
00:44:16I have...
00:44:17I have class.
00:44:18A pop quiz.
00:44:19The other one popping out is you.
00:44:21What?
00:44:22Can Big Billy come out to play?
00:44:25Oh!
00:44:26No, no.
00:44:27Here!
00:44:29You're so strong.
00:44:30Why are you acting like someone completely different?
00:44:35Uh...
00:44:36Denise!
00:44:41You know, what makes you think I'm Denise?
00:44:44I've got mental.
00:44:45Of course you're not Denise, but she's turned you into this honorable zombie.
00:44:48Okay, I'm just trying to be a little bit more responsible.
00:44:51I don't know what's so strange about that.
00:44:53This flashcard freak is running for prom queen!
00:44:56Yeah.
00:44:57I know she is.
00:44:59I think she has a pretty good shot at winning it, too.
00:45:00Okay, I hope she does.
00:45:01Then I can just pour some more slime on her just like you did yesterday.
00:45:04You wouldn't dare.
00:45:05Do you bet your biceps I would?
00:45:07Really?
00:45:07You make me want to be really bad.
00:45:09Okay.
00:45:09Oh, no.
00:45:10No, no, no.
00:45:11That's okay.
00:45:12No!
00:45:13Vixen!
00:45:13I don't want to kiss you!
00:45:14No!
00:45:19Oh my god, you're in love with that nerd, aren't you?
00:45:23What nerd?
00:45:26The human calculator with the bad haircut.
00:45:28What bad haircut?
00:45:29Oh my god.
00:45:32I hate you, Billington.
00:45:34Hey, you're making me love you!
00:45:41Ruth!
00:45:43This isn't over.
00:45:45This isn't over by a lock shot.
00:45:50What the hell just happened?
00:45:52Your girlfriend just broke up with you.
00:45:53Again?
00:45:54The second time's an A.
00:45:56Due to you!
00:45:57Okay, well, Billy, you're better off with that or all she does is just make fun of me every day.
00:46:01Everyone makes fun of you.
00:46:02And that's not my fault, is it?
00:46:03Well, maybe you shouldn't play the victim card all the time and people would actually respect you.
00:46:07Fuck you, Billy!
00:46:09Fuck me?
00:46:09Yeah, fuck you!
00:46:10Oh, fuck me!
00:46:12Eyes are high!
00:46:13Look who just grew a pair of balls!
00:46:15Eyeballs?
00:46:16You know what?
00:46:17After we swap bodies, I never want to see you again.
00:46:22Fine.
00:46:23Fine!
00:46:23Fine!
00:46:24Fine!
00:46:24Fine!
00:46:25Fine!
00:46:29Well, except for in a few hours when we have to study!
00:46:33Right?
00:46:37Fine!
00:46:37Fine!
00:46:44Okay, yeah, this is sure to be on the exam.
00:46:48Explain electrophilic aromati-
00:46:49Oh, hey!
00:46:51Man!
00:46:52Billy, I need you to focus!
00:46:54Okay, you have to pass my exam today.
00:46:55Why would I help you when you just torched my love life?
00:46:59It was an accident, okay?
00:47:01I didn't mean to break up with your stupid girlfriend.
00:47:03Then unbreak up with her.
00:47:04Get Vixen back or I'm done studying.
00:47:07What are you doing?
00:47:09Mature.
00:47:09Honestly, I think that you're better off without Vixen.
00:47:12She's literally just this, like, crazed, little over-sexed cheerleader
00:47:15who just wants to have premarital intercourse all of the time.
00:47:18Exactly! That's why I'm dating her!
00:47:20Okay, well, the longer that I've gotten to know you,
00:47:22I just, I feel like maybe you deserve a little bit better.
00:47:26Oh, oh, really? Yeah.
00:47:27And who would that be?
00:47:29You?
00:47:33Um, okay.
00:47:36Can we just go over all the condensation again, please?
00:47:38Uh, no.
00:47:39Get my Vixen back,
00:47:41or I'll fail your little test on this.
00:47:43Oh, oh, blackmail.
00:47:45Oh, is that what we're doing?
00:47:46We're doing blackmail now?
00:47:47Okay, fine.
00:47:49Excuse me.
00:47:52Denise!
00:47:54Wait, what did I just find?
00:47:56Is this a piece of cheesecake?
00:47:58You love cheesecake, don't you?
00:48:00So yum.
00:48:01Good luck fitting into your Speedo with a gut full of cheesecake.
00:48:04No!
00:48:06I love cheesecake.
00:48:08Cheesecake's my favorite.
00:48:09Okay, yeah.
00:48:09I use cheesecake all day, Billy.
00:48:11You're so funny, Denise.
00:48:13You're so funny, Denise.
00:48:13You're so funny!
00:48:15Uh-uh.
00:48:16What's this?
00:48:17Don't you dare.
00:48:18Don't you dare.
00:48:19No!
00:48:20Glucose kills your short-term memory.
00:48:21You will literally send my brain into a coma.
00:48:25You know what?
00:48:26Oh, okay.
00:48:27It is on.
00:48:37They're fun!
00:49:08You know, when you're not such a know-it-all all the time, you're actually kind of fun.
00:49:15Careful.
00:49:16I almost sounded like a compliment.
00:49:21We got an emergency!
00:49:24Vixen's going psycho on the quad.
00:49:26What?
00:49:29What is she doing?
00:49:31Vixen's saying even things that make me blush.
00:49:33She's saying you smell like gym socks, you stuffed your bra, and you got pool lice.
00:49:37She's trying to ruin your rep so you can't run for prom queen.
00:49:40Yeah, well, when are you gonna get it, Billy?
00:49:43Okay, you say that you're so in love with this woman and she's an absolute-
00:49:46bitch!
00:49:47And I'm done letting her treat you like shit.
00:49:49X!
00:49:50The skank.
00:49:50Human tampon.
00:49:51Yes, yes.
00:49:52You've seen her around.
00:49:52You've seen her around.
00:49:53Give me an X!
00:49:54Human tampon.
00:49:55You've seen her around.
00:49:56The skank of the school.
00:49:56Vinnie an X!
00:49:57Vinnie sucks!
00:49:59Do you have something you want to say to me?
00:50:00Say it to my face.
00:50:02My face?
00:50:02You come with a warning label.
00:50:04May cause diarrhea and suicidal thoughts.
00:50:07Your face is proof that evolution has a sense of humor.
00:50:11At least I don't smell like bath and body works and desperation.
00:50:16At least I don't smell like my boyfriend's best friend's dick.
00:50:20It was only one time on the bus ride back from the Kansas game.
00:50:23Oh my god!
00:50:25You actually cheated?
00:50:28Penny!
00:50:29Promise not to tell anyone!
00:50:30I was bluffing about you and Billy's best friend.
00:50:33I didn't know it was actually true.
00:50:34I can't help it if everybody wants me.
00:50:36Unlike you, who nobody wants.
00:50:39You'll never be me.
00:50:40You're just a nerd with bad hair and no life.
00:50:43You're right.
00:50:44I'll never be you.
00:50:46I'm not an insecure psycho who fantasizes about her own brother.
00:50:50I don't fantasize about my brother!
00:50:51Really, really.
00:50:52Then why do you moan his name every time you and Billy make out?
00:50:59How do you know that?
00:51:01I will get you for this, you bitch!
00:51:13Everyone is first!
00:51:15Come on!
00:51:17Come on!
00:51:19Luanne!
00:51:19I said I'll get you in those damn fine legs!
00:51:22Billy, this is a total misunderstanding.
00:51:24I'm sorry, why are you even talking to me?
00:51:25You dumped me, remember?
00:51:27Only so you'd beg me to take you back.
00:51:28Yeah, well I'm not a dog.
00:51:30And I don't beg.
00:51:32Especially for bitches like you.
00:51:34Let's go.
00:51:50This is pretty amazing.
00:51:54Yeah.
00:51:55No, this is pretty good.
00:51:58What's really amazing is you.
00:52:00I mean, what you did with Vixen, nobody has ever stood up for me like that before.
00:52:04That's because the person who should be standing up for you is you.
00:52:09Sorry.
00:52:09Sorry.
00:52:11Watch them learn.
00:52:13Good news, guys.
00:52:14I think I found a way to switch your bodies back.
00:52:16For Billy's swim meet and Denise's big test.
00:52:18Hold that thought.
00:52:19I gotta go past Denise's driving test.
00:52:21But you're scared to death of cars.
00:52:24After telling off my bitch of an ex-girlfriend, I'm scared of nothing!
00:52:29I think someone's got a crush on the boy who stole her body.
00:52:32I do not have a crush on the boy who stole my body.
00:52:36What?
00:52:39Okay, yeah, maybe like a little one.
00:52:42Little things have a habit of becoming big things.
00:52:44Just ask the boys on the swim team.
00:52:50Where are you going?
00:52:51The driving test.
00:52:51I love a good car crash.
00:52:53Woo!
00:52:54Let's go!
00:52:56Winner, you messed up.
00:52:57You won't be driving anything, anytime, anywhere.
00:53:00That means no car, no scooter, not even a shopping cart.
00:53:02You got it?
00:53:09Bet you five bucks.
00:53:10You hit three cones before the first turn.
00:53:15You got this.
00:53:16Okay?
00:53:17Just a couple of turns.
00:53:19It's easy peasy.
00:53:23Saddle up!
00:53:27Yeah!
00:53:36Yeah, I do.
00:53:41It's easy.
00:53:42Whew!
00:53:44Ooh!
00:53:46So good.
00:54:03Girlie, are you okay?
00:54:05Yeah.
00:54:05Yeah.
00:54:06Great.
00:54:07Goldilocks, it appears to me that you are about three bears short of a bullet forage
00:54:10today, so why don't we just do this another time?
00:54:12But...
00:54:12Uh-uh.
00:54:13No.
00:54:14You fake it.
00:54:15Please, coach.
00:54:16Just give me another chance.
00:54:18I know I have it in me.
00:54:21One more try.
00:54:24Put it in!
00:54:51Final test.
00:54:52Parallel park it.
00:54:54You ace this, you win.
00:54:56Otherwise, it would be parallel parking you.
00:55:19Coach.
00:55:21You passed.
00:55:23I passed?
00:55:23You passed.
00:55:26You did it!
00:55:43You did it.
00:55:43I did it!
00:55:44You did it!
00:55:45You did it!
00:55:46You did it!
00:56:05Something stinks.
00:56:06I had fish sticks for lunch.
00:56:08No, it's that Denise.
00:56:10She's done something to Billy to change him.
00:56:12I mean, Denise is kind of cute ever since she started wearing eyeliner.
00:56:16Rhonda!
00:56:16Yeah, but you hate her, so I hate her.
00:56:21I still can't believe she's running for prom queen.
00:56:24I can, and we're both voting for her.
00:56:26We are?
00:56:28I mean, we are.
00:56:31But why?
00:56:33I like to spell it as a kid.
00:56:34Oh, but we couldn't.
00:56:36Oh, but we could.
00:56:37We just have to get our hands on that slime.
00:57:07I'm...
00:57:08Shh, Billy, it's just us.
00:57:12You're trying to give me a heart attack.
00:57:13No, I'm trying to get us not caught, okay?
00:57:15We're not supposed to be doing this in here.
00:57:17All right, guys, listen, it's almost 313.
00:57:19If we want this spell to work, we gotta do it right now.
00:57:22So come on, let's go.
00:57:24Let's go.
00:57:27Come on, get comfortable.
00:57:29Come on, sit down.
00:57:31Is this supposed to actually work?
00:57:33Sweetheart, a year ago, I asked my father in to get me a Mustang and Beyonce tickets.
00:57:38Trust.
00:57:39Okay, bring your hands together.
00:57:41Let's go on.
00:57:43I'll take you for a mystical rollercoaster ride.
00:57:46Ultimate Switch!
00:57:49Chew-yip!
00:57:51Chew-yip!
00:57:53Choo-choo!
00:57:56Chew-yip!
00:58:00Did it work?
00:58:02No, I still have a penis.
00:58:04And I still don't.
00:58:05Shit!
00:58:06The universe is so fucking rude.
00:58:09Okay, well, it's official.
00:58:10We're never switching back, so...
00:58:11Never say never.
00:58:13I'm not giving up on you.
00:58:15Or us.
00:58:18We'll make this work.
00:58:20So cute.
00:58:26What in the name of Joe Clark is going on in here?
00:58:32Step away from the witchcraft circle and explain yourselves.
00:58:35Now!
00:58:36First of all, it's not a witchcraft circle.
00:58:39It's an artisanal manifestation zone.
00:58:41I don't care what it is.
00:58:42Your little extracurricular seance is over.
00:58:44Uh, Principal Rainmaker, we were just...
00:58:46We were just...
00:58:47Wasting precious time.
00:58:49Do you know what time it is, Mr. Miller?
00:58:52It's now or another time!
00:58:54You've got twin trails starting in ten minutes.
00:58:56And, Ms. Weiner, your science exam is not to begin.
00:58:59We need to go right now.
00:59:01Right, but what if we...
00:59:02What? No, what ifs?
00:59:03Look, just do your best.
00:59:05And to me, you've already won.
00:59:10You mean it?
00:59:10No, more Dillia Dallia!
00:59:12Move!
00:59:17You didn't pay me enough for this.
00:59:22Okay.
00:59:24So the rumor is that now it's a full experiment.
00:59:26So just trust your instincts and periodic table's got you.
00:59:33Racing's like solving an equation.
00:59:34One step at a time and focus.
00:59:37Okay, focused.
00:59:38Okay.
00:59:38One step at a time, just...
00:59:44I'm a bit scared.
00:59:46Me too.
00:59:47But you've got this.
00:59:48Yeah.
00:59:50You've got this too.
00:59:51Marito! Marito!
00:59:52We love you in your seat-o!
00:59:54You're an Aquaman!
00:59:55Time to make a splash.
00:59:56Yeah.
00:59:57Ms. Weiner!
00:59:58Your GPA is hanging by a three.
01:00:00And it's fraying fast.
01:00:09Let's swim, boys.
01:00:10Let's swim!
01:00:12Let's swim, boys!
01:00:13Woo!
01:00:14Woo!
01:00:21On your mark!
01:00:23And your time begins...
01:00:25Get set...
01:00:26...back.
01:00:49You can forget M.I.T.
01:00:52Try beauty school.
01:00:58Holy smokes, all that training down the drain.
01:01:02The Titanic is better in the water than you are today.
01:01:07Coach, what's my time?
01:01:08The fastest.
01:01:09Woo!
01:01:10Yeah.
01:01:12I can't lose.
01:01:13Not like this.
01:01:15Not like this.
01:01:21Coach, coach.
01:01:23Let me try again.
01:01:25One more time.
01:01:26Focus, Miss Wiener.
01:01:28One mistake, and it's all over with.
01:01:34One more.
01:01:35That's it.
01:01:36One more.
01:01:37One.
01:01:37One.
01:01:39Get up.
01:01:40Yeah.
01:01:41Get up.
01:01:41Get up.
01:01:44Okay.
01:01:44Okay.
01:01:45Okay.
01:01:47Okay.
01:01:48On your mark.
01:01:54Get set.
01:01:58Get.
01:02:09Yeah.
01:02:12Yeah.
01:02:38Miss Wiener, that's genius.
01:02:40A plus work.
01:02:42Always knew you had it, ain't you?
01:02:43No you didn't.
01:02:44You're nothing but a jerk to me all day.
01:02:50Miller?
01:02:53You are highs or highs and you swim team captain.
01:02:56Yeah!
01:02:58Let's go!
01:03:11Good job, Billy!
01:03:16Good job, Billy!
01:03:21Okay, how did it go?
01:03:23A plus.
01:03:23Yes!
01:03:24And how's your dingo?
01:03:25Yeah, this is from team captain.
01:03:27We did it!
01:03:29I guess we make a pretty good team.
01:03:31Maybe we're more than that.
01:03:42Billy!
01:03:44Congrats!
01:03:44I'm really proud of you.
01:03:48Vixen, you feeling okay?
01:03:50Denise, why keep fighting?
01:03:52We can just be friends.
01:03:53You?
01:03:54You wanna be friends with me?
01:03:55Of course!
01:03:56Why wouldn't I?
01:03:57I honestly hope you win prom queen tonight.
01:03:59You do?
01:04:00It's gonna be a prom to remember you guys.
01:04:03Okay, get to get to class.
01:04:08Why is she being so nice?
01:04:10It's like a shark offer and swim lesson.
01:04:12People can change, I guess.
01:04:18I mean, Billy did.
01:04:23So, maybe Vixen can too.
01:04:26Oh, about the question you asked earlier.
01:04:32I would love to go to prom with you.
01:04:36That is, if you still wanna go to prom with me.
01:04:43Uh, yes.
01:04:44Yes!
01:04:45Yes!
01:04:45I, I, it would, yes.
01:04:47It would be an honor to go to the prom with you.
01:04:50Thank you for asking me.
01:04:52Vixen's sure right about one thing.
01:04:54It'll be a prom to remember.
01:04:59We still have to finish decorating for the prom.
01:05:02Come on.
01:05:03I thought it was this way.
01:05:05No, that's this way, Billy.
01:05:08It's all taken care of, guys.
01:05:09I left a few surprises in there for you to see tonight.
01:05:12Thanks, Bolt.
01:05:15Oh my god, what am I gonna wear?
01:05:16Should I borrow my mom's pantyhose?
01:05:18Oh my god, did you really say pantyhose?
01:05:21I'll dress both of you tonight.
01:05:23What would you do without me?
01:05:40Why does Sabotard weigh so much?
01:05:42Because revenge is worth its weight in slime.
01:05:46Are you sure about this?
01:05:48Before prom's over, Denise will be the nerdiest nerd that ever nerded.
01:05:51And what about Billy?
01:05:52Help, beg me to take him back.
01:05:53And I'll be crowned queen.
01:05:54What do we do if anyone asks us about all this slime?
01:05:57We're just helping them decorate for prom.
01:06:35Wow!
01:06:36You, um, you look great.
01:06:38And you look pretty handsome.
01:06:43I- can you believe that we made it here?
01:06:45Um, together?
01:06:48We look good doing it. Yeah, we do
01:06:54Quiet
01:06:57When I say just do it hold the bucket no matter what just do it dad
01:07:04I'll teach that snitch bitch to take my man
01:07:23As prom chairwoman, it's my duty to announce Highs or Highs prom king and queen are
01:07:40Denise Wiener and Billy Miller
01:08:33Before our prom queen queen kiss I think there's something everybody here needs to see
01:08:48What is it?
01:08:50What's happening?
01:08:51No!
01:08:52Oh my god, Kenny, this is crazy!
01:08:55Oh my god, this is embarrassing
01:08:57She's gonna probably be alone her entire life, her and her 950 cats
01:09:01Denise, Denise, what's going on?
01:09:03How could you share this with everyone?
01:09:04Oh my god
01:09:08Denise, I'm so sorry
01:09:11Hey, hey, hey
01:09:13You know that's not who I am anymore
01:09:14You know, like hell it is
01:09:16Okay, and I'm so stupid to think that you would change in a day
01:09:24Excuse me
01:09:25Wait, Denise!
01:09:26I guess we're not bulletproof
01:09:30But we look so good on paper
01:09:46Actually, I want everyone to listen
01:09:49Everything I thought I was
01:09:51It's...
01:09:54It's all a lie
01:09:59Bullying doesn't make you strong
01:10:05Just alone
01:10:18I've spent my whole life fitting into other people's expectations for me
01:10:24I've become a totally new person
01:10:28Someone totally different from when we first met in third grade
01:10:33Today, everything changed
01:10:35And I've become the person that I've always wanted to be
01:10:40And it's all because I fell in love with you
01:10:46I need to know
01:10:50Do you love me too?
01:11:02Please, please, please let this work
01:11:04This isn't going to fall in love for real this time
01:11:06Please!
01:11:31No!
01:11:31No, yes!
01:11:45That's...
01:11:46Denise is dressed like a guy
01:11:48And Billy's dressed like a girl?
01:11:50This night sucks
01:11:53Nothing's going as planned at all
01:11:55Uhh...
01:11:55Right bodies
01:11:56Wrong outfit
01:11:58I don't know.
01:12:00You look pretty cute in my tux.
01:12:04This is the saddest thing I've ever seen.
01:12:08You're really going to throw away your reputation for this ugly nerd?
01:12:12She's nothing.
01:12:13She's pathetic.
01:12:14No.
01:12:15Vixen, you're wrong.
01:12:17Denise is not nothing.
01:12:19She's incredible.
01:12:21Honestly, all of us are the pathetic ones.
01:12:24Because we were too dumb to notice it.
01:12:26And me.
01:12:28I was too dumb to notice it.
01:12:32But I do now.
01:12:33I see you.
01:12:34You're perfect.
01:12:38And for the record, Vixen,
01:12:41Denise is far prettier than you ever will be.
01:12:44And not just because she has a beautiful face,
01:12:45but because she has a beautiful heart.
01:12:49Can't say the same about you now, can we?
01:12:50No, please, I'm going to vomit.
01:12:52You're just a loser, Billy Miller.
01:12:53And you?
01:12:54I don't even know what you are.
01:12:56Loser.
01:12:57She's a loser.
01:12:58You already lost, Vixen.
01:13:00School's almost over.
01:13:03There's a new queen in town.
01:13:05And she has her king.
01:13:12Stop.
01:13:12You can't do this to me.
01:13:13Stop.
01:13:14Why are you cheering for her?
01:13:15Stop.
01:13:16Stop cheering for her.
01:13:17You can't be doing this to me.
01:13:19Stop it.
01:13:20You can't do it.
01:13:21You can't do it.
01:13:23Just do it.
01:13:24Those are the magic rules.
01:13:37No, not me.
01:13:40Well, Vixen.
01:13:42You can't laugh at me.
01:13:43I'm the most popular girl at Highs or High.
01:13:45Well, someone get that tacky, washed up, non-popular girl off the stage, please.
01:13:49She's really icky.
01:13:51Oh, fuck you, Bolt.
01:13:52And fuck you, Billy.
01:13:53And fuck you, Denise.
01:13:54Fuck you, Ronna, for screwing up my whole plan.
01:13:56And fuck you, Kenny.
01:13:57Get out of my way.
01:13:59Move.
01:13:59Now.
01:14:00In fact, all you fuckers at Highs or High can all go fuck yourselves.
01:14:03Seriously, Miss Dior, the only person who's going to fuck herself is you.
01:14:09You're officially suspended.
01:14:10Now get off my stage and get out of my school.
01:14:13Ah!
01:14:15Ah!
01:14:18Ah!
01:14:19Ah!
01:14:20This is lame!
01:14:23Ah!
01:14:31And what are y'all clapping about?
01:14:33Get back to dancing!
01:14:48I guess Max Louise got a little taste of her own medicine.
01:14:51Yeah, about damn time, too.
01:14:54I literally must have been clinically insane to have ever actually liked her.
01:15:00And Denise, I'm so sorry.
01:15:03About everything that I've done, genuinely.
01:15:05Like, I can't say it enough.
01:15:07I'm so sorry.
01:15:09No, no, no.
01:15:09Hey, it's okay.
01:15:11I'm so sorry, too.
01:15:12And I forgive you.
01:15:14For everything.
01:15:16And I mean that.
01:15:22Mr. Miller.
01:15:23Miss Wiener.
01:15:24You two both are in big, big trouble.
01:15:29What?
01:15:30Why?
01:15:30What the hell do we do?
01:15:31Do we not decorate the gym for prom like you asked?
01:15:33That's why you in trouble.
01:15:34No one will ever make prom look so beautiful.
01:15:37Oh, my God.
01:15:39Okay, so we're not expelled?
01:15:41Nope.
01:15:42And I'm writing you two letters of recommendation.
01:15:45Hey, Miller, I'm going to make sure that you get a scholarship, but maybe lose the dress, pink ain't really
01:15:53your college, son.
01:15:55Hey, yeah.
01:15:55Yes, coach.
01:15:56Right away.
01:15:57Coach, actually.
01:15:59Good work, you two.
01:16:02So, what college do you want to go to?
01:16:06Um, hopefully whichever one you're at.
01:16:11Hey, could we do that thing again?
01:16:15What, swap bodies?
01:16:16No.
01:16:19This.
01:16:20There are always reasons, even in the coldest season, I'll take your heart and freeze it.
01:16:28There are always cycles, along the way just let go, life is no place for you, almost.
01:16:36We belong together, and the world, just like the sword in the stone.
01:16:43Oh.
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