- 8 hours ago
Jingle All the Way 2 (2014) [Full Movie] [Recommended]Full EP - Full
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Short filmTranscript
00:38It's cold out, baby, put a jacket on for the chill
00:43I got a bright red sleigh, babe, jingle bells, what a thrill
00:49I'm gonna take it downtown, we got Christmas time to kill
00:54It's a downtown Christmas, baby, take a ride with me
01:00It's a downtown Christmas, baby, take a ride with me
01:05On a cold Christmas night downtown is where I wanna be
01:10You know uptown, baby, they got no lights to see
01:15Head in southbound, baby, they got no
01:19Dad? Hey, Dad! Time to wake up!
01:26Dad!
01:27Where's the buttons on that snooze alarm?
01:32I'm not the snooze alarm
01:35Are you excited? It's time to go ice fishing
01:38I am excited, I'm gonna sleep on it and figure out what we're gonna do with it
01:46Remember, the early bird gets the worm
01:49And I think we know what happens to that worm
01:52It gets gobbled up and eaten
01:56Don't make me!
01:58All right, then
02:02All right, now you've done it
02:04You know what you just did?
02:06You just awakened a giant, abominable yeti
02:09And you know what he feeds on?
02:12Cookies?
02:12No
02:13No
02:14He feeds on tickles!
02:17He need a tickle!
02:19Come on, let's go fishing!
02:22Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah!
02:35I think, like, we might be my guy is the thing to say
02:39I want a bright boy on Christmas Day
02:43That's the island greeting that we're sending you
02:47From the land where palm trees sway
02:51You know that Christmas will be green and bright
02:56The sun shines on day and all the stars at night
03:01Macamaka, Macamaka, Macamaka is the wiseest way
03:05To say Merry Christmas to you
03:08Take it, girls!
03:09Take it away, Dad!
03:11Macamaka, Macamaka, Macamaka is the thing to say
03:14All right, Hawaiian Christmas Day
03:19That's the island greeting that we send to you
03:23From the land where palm trees sway
03:27Dad, I wish you could have been at Mommy's wedding
03:30You should have seen Mom's engagement ring
03:33The diamond was huge!
03:36And during the wedding, I got to hand-bomb her a ring
03:39Oh, you know what you've been telling me all week?
03:42That's awesome!
03:43If your mom is happy, I'm super happy
03:46Yeah, she's super happy
03:48And Victor's awesome, don't you think?
03:53Yeah, he's awesome
03:54Hey, you want to know what else is awesome?
03:56Yeah
03:56Watch this, what am I?
04:00A walrus with tooth decay
04:03A walrus with tooth decay
04:06Look funny, hey, you want a cheese doodle?
04:08For breakfast?
04:10No, not for breakfast
04:11You don't eat them for breakfast
04:12You eat a Twinkie for breakfast
04:17What's wrong?
04:18What's wrong?
04:18It's a Twinkie
04:21Hey, Dad
04:22How come you and Mom didn't stay married?
04:26Well, sweetie, I still love your mom and everything
04:31We're good friends
04:32I know
04:33You know, she likes classical music and petite fours
04:36And I like ice fishing and Twinkies
04:38And plus she's real organized and ambitious and driven
04:42And, well, I'm me
04:45I like ice fishing and Twinkies
04:49And classical music and petite fours
04:55I know
04:56And that's why you're my little girl
04:59I think I got one
05:00No way
05:01Are you a kid?
05:02I haven't caught anything here in six years
05:04Look, there it is
05:15Well, here we are
05:16Victor's place
05:18Wow, I can't believe I'm going to live here
05:21It's like a palace
05:23Hey, I guess that makes me a princess
05:26Yeah, well
05:28Looks like that makes me the troll
05:33Hurry, Victor
05:34They're here
05:35Hey, there she is
05:37Mommy, welcome home
05:37I miss you
05:39Look at you
05:40You look bigger
05:41Mommy, Victor
05:42What's up, Tiger?
05:43Hi, Victor
05:46Hey, buddy
05:47Well, hey, welcome home
05:50Hi, Larry
05:51Hey
05:52So, did you two have a good time together?
05:54Of course we did
05:54Look at her
05:55She's little princess
05:56We had fun, didn't we?
05:57We had tons of fun
05:58We went skating
05:59We went sledding
06:01We played hockey
06:02And today
06:03We went ice fishing
06:05Ice fishing?
06:07How outdoorsy
06:07Yeah
06:08And I caught a fish
06:09Show him, Daddy
06:11Sure did, let's try
06:12Look at that
06:13Look how fat that is
06:14That's a big one
06:15Might even be pregnant
06:15How was the honeymoon?
06:18Oh, fantastic
06:19A week in St. Croix
06:21Another sailing around the islands
06:24Victor has his own boat
06:25Wow
06:27So I guess it was your second best honeymoon
06:29I think you forget
06:30Ours, huh?
06:32Sizzler in a movie
06:33Huh?
06:34That was some good steak
06:36Yeah, that's big time
06:37Well, I'm not gonna brag about it
06:39Congratulations, Victor
06:40Thank you
06:41Now when she refers to her idiot husband
06:43She'll be talking about you
06:45Instead of me
06:47Larry
06:49Well, you're just getting nowhere on your decorations
06:51A little late, isn't it?
06:52Well, Trish told me how much Noel loves Christmas
06:55I love it
06:56Oh, he may have gone a little overboard
06:59No
07:03So, what do you think?
07:05Wow
07:07So pretty
07:09Anything for you, Sugar Plum
07:11It's our first Christmas together
07:12I wanted it to be a memorable one
07:15Mmm, sugar cookies
07:17Oh, after you wash your hands
07:20You gotta get that fish mouth off of there
07:23Larry, how about a cup of coffee?
07:24Hey, I could go for that
07:26Love it
07:26Love coffee
07:27Ah, Victor, have it
07:28Please
07:29Thank you
07:37So, how's the business
07:38Sorry
07:39You go first
07:40Oh, you do it
07:40How's the trucking business?
07:42Uh, part-time, right?
07:44Well, yeah, it's part-time
07:46But see, that's how I like it
07:47Part-time is good
07:49That gives me more time to spend with my daughter
07:56So, how's the, uh, cardboard box business treating you?
08:00Great
08:01Baxter Box Company is up, uh, 20% this year
08:04Online sales are booming
08:05I mean, all those packages have to be shipped somewhere, right?
08:11My grandfather would be proud
08:12Yep, I built Baxter Box into an empire
08:17What's this little deal right here?
08:19Look at that little box
08:20What, do you add water and it gets bigger?
08:23It's a little something I had made for the holidays
08:25To give the workers at the company
08:27You know, take it
08:28It's my gift to you
08:29Really?
08:30Yeah
08:33It's, uh, it's for decoration
08:35You can display it on your desk
08:37Well, I don't got a desk
08:47Coffee's ready?
08:48Oh, yes
08:49Hey, yeah, boy, I'll tell you what
08:50I could go for a steaming cup of joepel right now
08:53She goes back to school January 5th
08:55So, for the rest of Noelle's vacation
08:57We'll just alternate days
08:59As always
08:59With me and Victor getting Christmas Eve this year
09:02And you getting Christmas Day
09:04Yeah, that sounds good
09:05I'm in
09:05That's, wait
09:06He, he gets Christmas Day?
09:08Yeah
09:08Well, we switch off every year
09:11Alternate
09:11This year, it's Larry's turn
09:13I, I understand that
09:14It's just, you know
09:16It's, it's our first Christmas as a family
09:17I just thought we'd be together
09:19First one
09:20Ever
09:20Victor
09:21I get it one year
09:22You get the next year
09:23That's how it operates
09:24Of course
09:25I just, I just
09:26It's Christmas Day
09:27You know
09:28Christmas morning
09:29The presents under the tree
09:30Opening gifts
09:32The Christmas dinner
09:33With all the trimmings
09:34I got trimmings
09:36I make delicious trimmings
09:38Why can't I just do both?
09:41Spend half of Christmas with Dad
09:43And then go to Mom Bakters
09:45That's a great idea
09:49Come on, Dad
09:50Please, Dad
09:52Please
09:56All right
09:57We'll think of something
09:58All right
09:58We'll figure it out
09:59Go first
10:00Yay, I did two Christmases
10:08Sorry, Larry
10:10Victor's just so excited
10:11About being a stepdad
10:13He wants to spend
10:13As much time as possible
10:15With Noel
10:15Well
10:17What's done is done
10:19I'll tell you what
10:20We'll go ahead and
10:20Have Christmas number one
10:22At my house
10:23And then I'll bring her over here
10:24And you guys can have
10:25Christmas number two
10:26Thanks, Larry
10:28And I'll, I'll talk to Victor
10:30About how to handle
10:30These things in the future
10:32All right
10:32Dad, wait
10:34Victor's gonna put on
10:35The Christmas lights
10:36Okay, you ready?
10:37Come on
10:37Honey, let's go
10:38Here we go, ready?
10:40One
10:41Two
10:42Three
10:44Wow
10:46Wow
10:47Wow
10:47Wow
10:47Victor, that's amazing
10:49Dad, have you ever seen
10:52Something so beautiful?
10:54Yeah, it's something, all right
10:55It is something, that's for sure
10:57This is going to be
10:59The best Christmas ever
11:05See y'all later
11:06Good night, Daddy
11:08Good night, darling
11:09Hey, Ben Franklin
11:11You got a bulb out
11:12Ha ha
11:15It's all right, honey
11:16You did good
11:17Can't wait for Christmas
11:21And the lights on a Christmas tree
11:26No way
11:27He actually called her
11:29My little sugar plug
11:30Yeah
11:30I was standing right there
11:32Wow
11:33Even I know that's a violation
11:35Of Daddy's stepdaddy protocol
11:37You're gonna kick his butt
11:38Like you did Kip Kornhausen
11:40Kip Kornhausen
11:41Oh, man
11:42I thought that was in third grade
11:44No, I'm not gonna kick his butt
11:46I'm gonna teach him a lesson, though
11:48Ha ha
11:48When it comes to Christmas spirit
11:50Ha ha
11:51I'm fit to be Victor's worst nightmare
11:53But the toy
11:54Every little girl and boy
11:56Wants for Christmas
11:57Is Harrison
11:58The talking bear
11:59Hey, check this out
12:00Using a sophisticated computer chip
12:03Harrison can learn up to 300 words
12:05Including a child's name
12:08Hi
12:09I'm Harrison
12:10What's your name?
12:12Margo
12:13Nice to meet you, Margo
12:15Let's be friends
12:17Ha ha
12:17Well, if you want one in time for Christmas
12:19Well, you better hurry
12:21Supplies are limited
12:22And they're not
12:23Man
12:23I wish I had one of those when I was a kid
12:26There it is right there
12:27Christmas lights 100 foot
12:29For $32.99
12:31So if I want to get as many as Victor's got
12:34Let's see
12:35That's gonna run me about
12:37A liver and two kidneys
12:40Oh, boy
12:42You know he's gonna have a whole winter wonderland over there for her
12:44I can't really compete with his wallet
12:46So I'm gonna have to use my head
12:48I'll take the wallet
12:49First round knockout
12:51Thanks for the vote of confidence there, Mags
12:52It's on the house, Larry
12:58Wait a minute
12:59I've got a great idea
13:00Come on
13:06Well, that about does it
13:07We're all done
13:08That's it
13:09That's the last part
13:10You know, using these used car parts, Larry, was a great idea
13:14This thing's gonna look amazing
13:16Darn right it will
13:17Tell you what
13:17Victor can put that in his wallet and sit on it
13:19You're not gonna find better Christmas lights than that anywhere
13:22Not even at Kmart
13:24Speaking of the devil
13:25Well, looky here
13:29This is gonna be fun
13:31Hi, Daddy
13:32Hey
13:34What's this?
13:38Looks like you're using a lot of electricity, Larry
13:40You sure this thing is safe?
13:42Come on, now
13:43Of course it is
13:43I rigged it myself
13:44Obviously it's safe
13:46All right
13:48Oh, for Pete's sake
13:51Claude, would you get up here?
13:53All right
13:55In honor of Christmas
13:56And Noel
13:57Well, I bring to everybody
14:00Larry's spectacular parade of lights
14:03Use it, please, Claude
14:09All right
14:15That ought to be in some kind of a home and garden magazine right there
14:18That's unbelievable
14:24Wow
14:28Oh
14:32What do you think of that, sweetheart?
14:34It's awesome
14:35It's glorious
14:37And now I present to you
14:39The grand finale
14:41As they say in French
14:42The peace
14:43Of the resistance
14:52Daddy!
14:54Daddy?
14:55Harry, are you okay?
14:58Am I in heaven?
15:01Uh, hi, Victor.
15:06Sorry, there was a power out of his last night,
15:08so we couldn't make pancakes this morning
15:10or bake Christmas cookies last night.
15:12It's okay, I can bake cookies later with Chef Felipe.
15:15Who's Chef Felipe?
15:17It's Victor Chef.
15:18Chef? I bet Victor Chef ain't got fruity pebbles.
15:22How's them fruity pebbles?
15:23Delish.
15:25That's right, they're delicious.
15:27Dad, I think we need a new holiday tree.
15:31What's wrong with that one?
15:32That's one of them little Charlie Brown trees.
15:34He's so cute.
15:38I like the smell of Mommy and Victor's better.
15:43And it doesn't have enough room for presents.
15:48Why don't you and me go shopping
15:50for a big old Christmas tree?
15:52Yay, cool beans!
15:55Can I have this one?
15:57It's almost as big as the one that Mommy and Victor have at their house.
16:01Yeah, but honey, that thing's $300.
16:03I mean, that's crazy.
16:04For $300, it ought to already have presents underneath it.
16:09You know what, sugar?
16:10Picking the Christmas tree is like picking a boyfriend.
16:12Trust me, you can't just settle on the first one.
16:14Or the second one, or the third, or the fourth, or the fifth.
16:17Okay, I get it, Dad.
16:18Hey, can I get apple cider?
16:22I'll tell you what, that's the best idea I've heard all day.
16:25Here you go, get me one if it's not $300.
16:28Okay.
16:35So, you like what you see?
16:38Uh, I plead the fifth.
16:42Well, we have a wide variety of trees here.
16:44I see.
16:45If you want a fir tree, we've got Douglas fir, we've got Noble fir,
16:48we've got Conkler fir, we've got Tainan fir.
16:51But you know what, you look more like a pine guy to me.
16:53Do I look like a pine guy?
16:55Uh-huh.
16:56Here I thought I was more of a Conkler.
16:58Boy, all these years I've been living a lie.
17:01Well, we have white pine, Virginia pine, and scotch pine.
17:04So, what's your pleasure?
17:05I want something very special and cheap.
17:08Special and cheap, huh?
17:10Yeah.
17:10Well, the ones that are cheaper tend to be on the more sparse side,
17:14but you can cover it up if you flock it.
17:16Flocked?
17:17This one right here is only $165.
17:21$165?
17:22How much is the flocking?
17:23Oh, the flocking's free.
17:25You know what?
17:26I'll just take the flocking.
17:28Well, you could go for this little guy over here.
17:30He might be more in your price range.
17:33What in tarnation is that thing?
17:36That is a special order.
17:3950-foot Norway spruce shipped from Maine.
17:4150-foot?
17:42It costs $10,000.
17:44$10,000?
17:47What kind of blockhead buys a Christmas tree for $10,000?
17:52Okay.
17:53Yeah, yeah.
17:53That's great.
17:54Oh.
17:54Never mind.
17:56Hey, can you give me a second?
17:57I want to take that tree out.
17:58Sure.
17:59That's something else.
18:01Mmm.
18:03Couldn't find anything bigger?
18:05Just kidding.
18:06Thank you very much.
18:07It's fantastic.
18:10Hey, Trish.
18:11Oh.
18:11Oh, it's perfect.
18:13Noelle's gonna love it.
18:13It's gonna be the best tree lighting ever.
18:16Victor, I get that Baxter Box always goes to town's tree lighting ceremony,
18:19but do you really have to buy the town a $10,000 tree?
18:23Are you trying to run for mayor or something?
18:25No, no, hon.
18:26I'm just trying to buy some goodwill and affection here.
18:29I just figure the bigger the tree, the more the affection, right?
18:32Oh, so he's trying to buy Noelle's love.
18:35My little girl's love ain't for sale for anybody.
18:38Oh, sorry.
18:39Hey!
18:40Yo!
18:41I'm in here!
18:41Turn it off!
18:43I can't see!
18:45Turn it off!
18:46Somebody turn this machine off!
18:48I can't see!
18:50I can't see!
18:50I can't see!
18:51I can't see!
18:52I can't see!
18:56Dad!
18:57What happened?
18:59Well, I hope somebody got the license plate of that pigeon.
19:03You wanna have a snowball fight?
19:05Huh?
19:06Come on!
19:06I can't see!
19:13Yeah!
19:14Ouchie!
19:15Ah!
19:17Ha!
19:17Ha!
19:17Ha!
19:17Ha!
19:17Na, na, na, na, na!
19:19You missed me!
19:21Yeah!
19:22No, no, no!
19:24Yeah!
19:24You have got a really good arm!
19:26Ha!
19:27Ha!
19:29Ha!
19:30Ha!
19:32Ha!
19:34Ha!
19:36No, okay, this is war.
19:38Yeah.
19:39No!
19:40Oh, wait a minute.
19:41You made me.
19:41Ha!
19:42He hit me.
19:44Ha!
19:46Ow.
19:47Oh, ow.
19:48I'm going to feel this in the morning.
19:50How are you even doing that?
19:52Oh.
19:54Ha!
19:55Ha, ha, ha.
19:56I hit you 100 times.
19:59I got you a million and 98.
20:05Hey, you two have fun?
20:07We had tons of fun.
20:08I totally nailed Victor.
20:10Oh, good for you.
20:12Well, your lunch is ready for you in the kitchen.
20:14And remember, we're dropping you off your dads at 3.
20:18We have enough time for another snowball fight after lunch.
20:21Right, Victor?
20:23You wouldn't be interested in peace talks, would you?
20:26Not a chance.
20:29I had a lot of fun with you, Victor.
20:35Oh, me too.
20:37You're almost as much fun as my dad.
20:45Almost as much fun as Larry.
20:52I can't compete with that guy.
20:56Skating, sledding, hockey, ice fishing.
21:00He's like a big, squishy teddy bear.
21:03This isn't a competition, Victor.
21:05You're Noelle's dad, too.
21:06Dad number two.
21:08Dad number two.
21:09Second best.
21:10Runner up.
21:11A substitute.
21:14Not the real thing, but a startling simulation.
21:17Dad two, as in dad also.
21:21Your job is to be there for Noelle.
21:23Same as Larry.
21:26That's all that matters.
21:28Okay?
21:34Okay.
21:36Take a look.
21:38Take a look.
21:42I'm telling you, Clyde.
21:44Victor may have a snow machine, but Noelle is gonna love that.
21:47Larry, this is crazy.
21:49Yeah, but this is a real good kind of crazy.
21:52Who needs a snow machine when you've got real snow?
21:57Go like this.
21:57It's better on your back.
22:06When is he gonna be here?
22:07I'm sure he'll be here soon, honey.
22:09Hopefully in the next year.
22:12It's Larry.
22:14There he is.
22:18Hey!
22:19Hey!
22:24Hi, Daddy!
22:25Where's my little girl?
22:28Oh, good night, Larch.
22:32Whoa, you're getting big.
22:33We've been waiting for a half hour, Larry.
22:35Where have you been?
22:36I got a surprise for Noelle.
22:38A surprise?
22:39What is it?
22:39How would you like to have some real snow at Christmas?
22:43We already have snow at Victor's.
22:45I know, but that's that fake stuff.
22:48I mean real snow.
22:48Just come out of the sky and everything.
22:50It's real snow, not that synthetic, man-made polyester stuff that you got at your house.
22:55This is real.
22:57That would be awesome.
22:59Darn right it would be.
23:00Let's show these non-believers, Larry.
23:02Boy, up until Dad's gonna be excited.
23:04This is the best idea I ever had.
23:05Get ready to be bulldozed.
23:07Ah!
23:09Ah!
23:12Ah!
23:13Ah!
23:15Ah!
23:16Anybody got a towel?
23:17Daddy?
23:21You know what that is?
23:22No.
23:23It's a tickle monster!
23:24Ah!
23:25Ah!
23:26It's a tickle monster!
23:28All right, you goof.
23:29Time for bed.
23:32Good night, Dad.
23:33Thanks for the snow.
23:34I really liked it.
23:36Even though it's melted and everything.
23:39Ah, sweetie.
23:40That's nice of you.
23:41I appreciate it.
23:44Listen.
23:44I love you.
23:45Good night.
23:45Now you have a good night's sleep, okay?
23:47Good night, Daddy.
23:49Good night, sweetie.
24:00I don't know, Claude, I just can't catch a break.
24:03I don't know how I can compete with Victor.
24:06No, it's tough.
24:07I'll give you that.
24:08He's younger, richer, more educated.
24:12He's in great shape.
24:13Much, much, much better looking.
24:15All right, I get the point.
24:17Look, the more important question is, why do you feel the need to compete with Victor?
24:22Noelle doesn't care about that stuff.
24:24She loves you for you, Larry.
24:26I am pretty lovable.
24:30Good night, Larry.
24:33See you later, Claude.
24:42Is my angel ready to order?
24:44I sure am.
24:46I was referring to the little angel.
24:48Oh, sorry.
24:49My usual, Maggie, please.
24:52PB and J, light on the PB and heavy on the J.
24:56Correct.
24:57You know what, I'll have the same thing I always have, too.
25:00Deep-fried everything, hold the salad.
25:02Boom.
25:03Tell you what, Maggie, you know me pretty good.
25:06I got your number, Larry.
25:12See what you're working on there, your homework?
25:14My letter to Santa.
25:17Letter to Santa?
25:17I thought you got that done July 4th.
25:21There's something special I want.
25:24What is it?
25:25I can't tell you, or anyone else.
25:28If I do, it won't come true.
25:31It's like making a wish.
25:33No, no, no, don't worry.
25:35I'm not going to ruin that, but, uh, hey, can you give me a little hint?
25:40I'm asking Santa for the one thing I want more than anything in the world.
25:50Well, hey, I got an idea.
25:53There's a mailbox right over there.
25:55Why don't you give me the letter?
25:57And then I'll run it out there.
25:59Would you, Daddy?
26:01Thank you so much.
26:02You got it, Squirt.
26:03Come, I'll be right back.
26:15Hey, Larry.
26:16Hey, Claude.
26:17What's going on?
26:19Noelle's letter to Santa Claus.
26:21Figure what Victor can do in quantity, I can do with quality.
26:25What?
26:26You're not thinking of opening that, are you?
26:28Yeah.
26:30Of course.
26:31I mean, look, Victor can get her big old trees and a bunch of fancy lights and a bunch
26:35of fake snow.
26:37But when I see what she's got in here, what she really wants for Christmas, I can give
26:41it to her.
26:42That's a private letter.
26:44Not addressed to you.
26:45Not to mention that's a federal crime.
26:49Claude, it's my daughter's letter to Santa Claus.
26:52I think we're gonna be fine.
26:55That's just wrong.
26:56Wrong, wrong, wrong.
26:58And you see this?
26:59This is my letter to Santa Claus.
27:01If I find out you tampered with it, well, you're gonna answer to me and Mr. Claus himself.
27:12Boy, who pooped in his hash browns?
27:38Oh boy, her handwriting's horrible.
27:41Just like her daddy's.
27:42Dear Santa, for Christmas I want my family to get her...her...her...her...her...soney.
27:53Huh?
27:55What the heck's a her-soney?
27:57Bye-bye, Daddy!
27:59See you later, sweetheart!
28:05So, what did you and Larry do today?
28:07Not much.
28:08Uh-huh.
28:08More ice fishing?
28:09No, we just went to the diner.
28:14I wrote a letter of Santa!
28:16Oh, oh, oh, let me guess.
28:17Uh, Pixie and her Starburst buddies.
28:21Little Paris and her magical closet.
28:23Those are little kid toys.
28:26Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, hold on.
28:27What, um...what did you ask Santa for?
28:31I can't tell you, or else I won't get what I want.
28:34I didn't even tell Dad.
28:36Oh.
28:37Oh.
28:38Well...
28:39You know, we should probably mail those letters right away.
28:42So, uh, you know, I could take it for you.
28:45Dad already did.
28:47Did he?
28:48He ran right out of the diner to mail as soon as I wrote it.
28:55Really?
28:58Thanks.
28:59Excuse me.
29:04Security Welling here.
29:05Welling!
29:06I have an assignment for you.
29:10Hmm.
29:13Yes, sir.
29:14It would be my pleasure, sir.
29:31What are you up to, chubby?
29:40Oh, hey!
29:43Hi, I'm Jeffrey.
29:44Welcome to Toy Traders.
29:45Merry Christmas.
29:46Happy holidays, happy Hanukkah, happy Kwanzaa, and a very happy winter solstice.
29:51I think you got all the bases covered, champ.
29:53Oh, thank you.
29:54Hey, listen, I'm looking for something, but I don't quite know what I'm looking for.
29:58Okay.
30:01Harrisona.
30:03I'm sorry, I'm having a hard time reading your handwriting.
30:06Oh, that's not my handwriting.
30:07That's my daughter.
30:07She said it.
30:08Mine's a lot worse, trust me.
30:10Oh, it is?
30:11Wow.
30:12Um, yeah.
30:14You have any of those?
30:14Yeah, uh, no clue.
30:17No idea, sir.
30:20Wait a second.
30:21Unless she means Harrison.
30:23What's a Harrison?
30:25Harrison the Talking Bear.
30:27You are going to love this.
30:28Follow me, yes!
30:30Why, Harrison the Talking Bear, haven't you heard?
30:33It's only the most popular toy amongst the coveted five- to ten-year-old age demographic.
30:37So, the bear learns the kids' names, and then sends it back to them.
30:42It's the hottest toy this season.
30:44Really?
30:44Oh, yeah.
30:45That bear?
30:45They love it.
30:46That's what kids are going nuts over.
30:48Going nuts for the bear!
30:49Well, all right, I guess I'll get my daughter one.
30:51Oh, sorry.
30:52But we're all sold out.
30:53These things keep flying off the shelves as fast as we can stock them.
30:57Oh, man, my daughter really wants one of these bears.
31:00You think maybe you might have one in the back?
31:02Sorry.
31:05But if you write your name and number down there, I will call you as soon as we get some
31:09more in.
31:10You think maybe some other stores might have one of these bears?
31:13Hmm, maybe.
31:14But you'll have to try again tomorrow, because all the shops are closing up right now.
31:18All right, well, looks like tomorrow I'm going bear hunting.
31:22No, thanks for shopping at Toy Traders.
31:23Merry Christmas, happy holidays, happy Hanukkah, happy Kwanzaa, and a very happy winter solstice!
31:29Okay, okay.
31:30Merry Christmas in any language.
31:31Merry Christmas!
31:32Hey!
31:33Hi, I'm Jeffrey.
31:34Welcome to Toy Traders.
31:36Can I help you out with anything?
31:38A Harrison talking bear.
31:40Are you sure?
31:41That's what he asked for.
31:42He seemed really desperate to get it.
31:45So, Noel wants a Harrison talking bear.
31:49And to your knowledge, he hasn't found one yet?
31:52Nope.
31:53All the other stores are closed.
31:54Although he'll certainly be out looking for one tomorrow.
31:58Good.
32:00I have another assignment for you.
32:09Five more minutes.
32:11Give me five more minutes.
32:161130.
32:22I got the holiday wrapped up tight.
32:27Keep ready for the Christmas night.
32:32Wrapping up the presents.
32:34Wrapping up the year.
32:35Take the good with the bad.
32:36Be a good cheer.
32:38I don't think I asked for much.
32:41I'm just a little sad and sad.
32:43What you gonna give me for Christmas?
32:46Christmas.
32:48If I could have just one thing.
32:50Make it everything.
32:53Yeah, I want it on for Christmas.
32:55Christmas.
32:56For Christmas.
33:00Five more minutes.
33:01Five more minutes.
33:02I'm going to go.
33:03I'm going to go.
33:04I'm going to go.
33:05I'm going to go.
33:06I'm going to go.
33:06I'm going to go.
33:11I got the holiday wrapped up tight.
33:16Get you ready for the Christmas night.
33:21I don't think I asked for much.
33:24Interested in a certain search.
33:26What you gonna give for Christmas?
33:29Christmas.
33:31If I could have just one thing.
33:34Let's load him up and move him out.
33:36I'm on it on for Christmas.
33:38Christmas.
33:40Christmas.
33:42Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
33:44Wrap it up.
33:46Wrap it up.
33:49Yeah, yeah, yeah.
33:51Oh, man.
33:52Wrap it up.
33:54Yeah, yeah.
33:55Wrap it up.
33:56Yeah, yeah.
33:57I'm on it on Christmas.
34:00Now, I'm on it on Christmas.
34:02Hi.
34:03Excuse me.
34:12Mine.
34:21Yeah, I understand.
34:24Well, let me ask you.
34:25Are you going to be getting any more Harrison Bears in?
34:28Well, I'm glad it's the daggum funny
34:32Still no luck?
34:34Nothing
34:34Try to every toy store, then 500 miles
34:38Waynesville, Morgantown, Boone
34:39They're all sold out
34:41Well, what about online?
34:44eBay?
34:45They got rush delivery, right?
34:47As soon as they get to me is on the 26th
34:49I need it on Christmas, not the day after
34:51Well, I'm sure that she'll love whatever you got her
34:56Well, that's the problem
34:59I didn't get her nothing yet
35:02Planting ahead, I see
35:04Maggie, it ain't easy
35:05Back in the day when she was littler
35:07You know, going to some toy store
35:09Get her some kind of a doll with pink on it
35:12Or some kind of unicorn or bunny
35:13Or something with a magic wand
35:16She's older now
35:17It just doesn't work, it's a lot harder
35:21I gotta get that bear
35:29Here's Larry
35:30Hey, this is Jeffrey calling from Toy Traders
35:32You signed up for the Harrison wait list?
35:34Well, I'm calling to tell you
35:36That we have more Harrison bears just arrived
35:38They'll be available tomorrow morning
35:40On a first-come, first-served basis
35:41So get here early
35:44Oh, man
35:45I don't believe it
35:46I got me a Harrison bear
35:50Woo!
35:51Pie for everybody
35:52You're the only one here, Larry
35:55Well, I'll take theirs
36:03Hey, Mr. Welling
36:05Hey, this is Jeffrey calling from Toy Traders
36:08Well, I'm calling to tell you some really, really good news
36:12We'll see
36:13First-come, first-served
36:15What time do you open?
36:18We'll see you then
36:31I'm awake
36:31I'm awake
36:41Yeah, you're a pretty good dad, Larry
36:43I bet Victor wouldn't do this for Noel
36:48Oh, man
36:49You gotta be kidding me
36:51Hey, is everybody in this line to buy a Harrison bear?
36:55That's right, friend
36:58What some people won't do to get a toy, huh?
37:01Yeah
37:03It's crazy
37:11How you doing?
37:13Something bear
37:14No, no, no
37:16I put one on hold
37:20Good morning, everyone
37:22Thank you for waiting outside all night long
37:24I am thrilled to let you know
37:26that we have a new shipment of Harrison bears
37:33Okay, one at a time
37:35Let's slow down
37:36Pick a time
37:37There's no rush
37:42Where are these bears?
37:47What?
37:48There's nothing here
37:50Oh, man, this can't be happening
37:52Hey, where are all the bears?
37:55Yeah, where's the new shipment?
37:57I'm sorry, everyone, but the Harrison bears have sold out
38:00What?
38:01Oh, come on
38:02Thank you for shopping at Toy Traders
38:06And have a very merry Christmas
38:08Happy holidays, happy Hanukkah, happy Kwanzaa
38:10And a very happy winter solstice
38:13You mean to tell me that thing sold out in five minutes?
38:16More like 30 seconds
38:18First customer just came and bought them all
38:20Oh, he bought every one of them bears
38:23Yeah, all 50 of them
38:25Guess he's got a lot of kids
38:26Did you guy like some kind of a one per family limit or something?
38:30I told you, it was first come, first serve
38:34Boy
38:35You know what?
38:36I hope you have a sucky holiday, a sucky Christmas, a sucky Hanukkah, a sucky Kwanzaa, and a sucky winter
38:42salsa
38:46What are you looking at? You started the whole thing
38:50Oh, okay
38:51Well, it looks like someone's going to get coal in their stocking this year
38:54When the coal, when the fairies put the coal
38:57And you just wish you had something other than coal
39:05Hey
39:11Hey
39:13You're the guy at the front of the line
39:15Are you the guy that's been buying up all these bears?
39:17First come, first serve
39:20You got like 50 of them
39:21How many kids you got?
39:22I have a lot of nephews and nieces
39:24Hey, listen
39:26You think maybe you could, uh, spare me one of them?
39:29I mean, I'll give you $100
39:32$100, one bear
39:34Sorry
39:35Oh, man, look, I'm des- man, I'm really desperate
39:37I'd love to have one of those
39:38Ah, jeez
39:40Ah, I'll go
39:42If you'll excuse me, I have a lot more holiday shopping to attend to
39:53If I wouldn't pull a Christmas spirit, I'd have knocked him out
39:59And you're certain there's not a single Harrison bear on any shelf in town?
40:03Uh-huh
40:05Thank you, Welling
40:10Noelle, your dad's here
40:15Bye, sweet pea
40:16Bye, Mom
40:19So, how's everything, Larry?
40:21Oh, awesome
40:22Real good
40:23Couldn't be better
40:23Doing any last-minute Christmas shopping?
40:25A little bit, you?
40:26Nope, nope, no
40:27I think I got it pretty much wrapped up this year
40:28Good
40:29In fact, I think this is going to turn out to be an extra special Christmas for someone we both
40:33know
40:36You two have fun
40:40Come on, Dad
40:48Wow, this is looking really great
40:50You're darn right it does
40:52Look at it
40:53Dad, you're eating all the shingles
40:56I know
40:58It's pathetic, ain't it?
41:00Here I thought I'd be pulled after the chimney
41:04Don't worry, sweetheart
41:05I got enough shingles for 10,000 gingerbread houses
41:09Hey, I bet Victor doesn't have time to make a gingerbread house with you like I do
41:15No, he's been awfully busy
41:17I mean, some big project called
41:21Operation Who's Your Daddy?
41:26Let me ask you something
41:27You didn't happen to tell Victor was in that letter you wrote to Santa Claus, did you?
41:31Oh, no, Dad
41:31I want to do anything that might keep me from getting what I asked for
41:36Boy, you really want that thing, don't you?
41:39Whatever it is
41:41Uh, hey, sweetheart, let me ask you something
41:45What if Santa Claus isn't able to get you what you asked for?
41:48Oh, no, Dad, don't even say that
41:50I know Santa will come through
41:53He just has to
42:06You haven't even touched your pie
42:08Oh, Maggie
42:10I ain't got much of an appetite
42:12Maybe I should take your pulse to see if you're still alive
42:15It's a dead gum stuffed bear
42:17It's stressing me out
42:18You haven't found one yet?
42:20No, them stuffed bears are rarer than a cab driver with fresh breath
42:26Hey, maybe you should ask those ladies where they got theirs
42:30Hurry
42:31That's a Harrison bear
42:33I'll be right back
42:38Excuse me, ladies
42:39Excuse me, ladies
42:40Hold on
42:42I'm desperate
42:43It's a batch of bear
42:44What about the bear?
42:46Well, I want it and I was wondering if anybody
42:48No
42:49You're the fifth person in the last hour to ask us about it
42:52And we're telling you like we told all the others
42:54It's not for sale at any price
42:56No, I don't want to buy it
42:57I was just saying
42:58Oh, so you just want to take it
43:00Nobody takes this bear
43:02It's for our grandniece
43:04No, I think you're misunderstanding
43:06We're warning you
43:07We've taken a senior citizen self-defense class
43:10Huh?
43:11Stop
43:14That'll teach you
43:15Don't mess with a senior
43:21Oh, so long Christmas is getting violent
43:30Harrison bear
43:32Rooster's tavern
43:34Reindeer charity fundraiser
43:38Yeah
43:42Welcome, ladies and gentlemen
43:45And the Rooster's tavern's annual
43:47Fucking reindeer charity fundraiser
43:53Hooray!
43:55I'm not too crazy about this
43:57We have ten very brave Santas up here
44:00Willing to risk life and limb
44:03And help raise money to St. Luke's Children's Hospital
44:06By trying to see how long
44:08They can stay open
44:12I mean, I've never ridden a mechanical reindeer before
44:14Neither have I
44:15But the way I figure it
44:17Oak's office riding it
44:18Gives us a better chance
44:18Of wearing that Harrison bear down there
44:20For no hell
44:20And the Santa who stays on the longest
44:22Will win our grand prize!
44:28We got it, we got it
44:30Better give up now, fellas
44:31Because my boy wants that bear for Christmas
44:33And I never let my boy down
44:35Yeah, well, my little girl wants it too
44:37And I never let my little girl down
44:40I'll tell you something
44:40It ain't over till it's over
44:42Oh, it's over
44:43Let the game begin!
44:47Santa number one!
44:48Victory!
44:49That's Santa number one up here
44:50Are you ready?
44:51Santa number one!
44:53On your mark
44:54Get shut!
44:56Let's rise!
44:58It's over to Santa!
45:04He's home!
45:06Thank you!
45:08He's home!
45:08He's home!
45:09We've got his score!
45:117 seconds!
45:12Not a bad start, Santa number one!
45:14Well, let's get the second Santa Claus up here!
45:16Let's go, Santa number two!
45:18You can do it, Claus!
45:19Stay on her, buddy!
45:21Santa number two!
45:22Are you ready?
45:22Santa number two, are you ready?
45:22I'm ready.
45:24Ready, set, let's ride!
45:30That was anchor today.
45:33How long did I go for?
45:35You were on board.
45:37One second.
45:39One second, everybody.
45:41Keep it going for Santa number three.
45:43Let's ride!
45:51Community's got nine seconds!
46:00Let's ride!
46:06Go, go, go!
46:10Yes!
46:11Oh, yeah!
46:13Stand at number seven.
46:15Come on down!
46:17Woo-hoo!
46:19Let's ride!
46:22Number seven throwing on!
46:24Oh, yeah!
46:26He's got his first turn!
46:28Oh, my gosh!
46:30Look at this guy go!
46:31Oh, he's still hanging on!
46:33He's holding on for dear life!
46:35He's still going!
46:38You've got to be kidding me!
46:40Number seven!
46:42Twenty-two seconds!
46:48You've done it number seven!
46:49What are you going to do, Larry?
46:51You can't hold on for 23 seconds.
46:53I want to get something out of my truck.
46:54Come on.
46:55Let me tell you something.
46:56This glue is going to give me the edge I need.
46:58Do me a favor.
46:59Get my backside, would you?
47:00Oh, that's disgusting.
47:01Would you just do my backside there?
47:03Do you want Noel to win that bear or not?
47:05Oh, yeah.
47:06Do not forget.
47:08You must get at least 23 seconds on the bull to win the grand prize.
47:14Let's go, boys!
47:15Let's run!
47:17Come on, Timmy!
47:19Woo-hoo!
47:20Woo-hoo!
47:22Woo-hoo!
47:22Woo-hoo!
47:23Woo-hoo!
47:26Woo-hoo!
47:26How fast this thing go?
47:28Okay!
47:29Woo-hoo!
47:29Woo-hoo!
47:31Woo-hoo!
47:32Woo-hoo!
47:34Woo-hoo!
47:42Woo-hoo!
47:43Woo-hoo!
47:44Woo-hoo!
47:45Go just win!
47:45Help me!
47:48Woo-hoo!
47:48Ah-aha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!
47:49Woo!
47:50Call him!νοastboy!
47:52Go pull! Wo
47:54-hoo!
47:54Hey, him!
47:55O-ho!
48:00He's done it
48:01in 31 seconds! We gotta do a
48:04at 31 seconds! We've got a
48:04new chance! We gotta do a
48:05kill! Oh!
48:05I won! I won! 31 seconds, you hear?
48:10You have won yourself a weekend for two in the beautiful, romantic, Pocono Mountains!
48:20Pocono?
48:21Alright!
48:21No, no, no, I wanted the bear! I thought first prize was the bear!
48:26Well done! Now, in second place, rider number seven, you have won Harrison the Talking Bear!
48:34I won?
48:38My boy's gonna have the best Christmas ever!
48:42Oh, yeah! Number two! Give it up for number two!
48:46Oh, yeah!
48:48Now, what am I gonna do with the trip to the Poconos?
48:51I'll go with you.
48:53Come on, Claude.
48:56Boy, it's breezy in here.
48:59I'll tell you, Claude.
49:00I don't know. I know this, though.
49:02At this rate, I'm never gonna get one of them bears.
49:14What is going on?
49:20Harrison loves to play!
49:22Anybody out of here?
49:24That tickles!
49:26Hi, baby Harrison! Time for a nap!
49:31Hi, Heidi-ho! I'm Harrison!
49:33Harrison.
49:33Harrison!
49:33Oh, yeah!
49:40This is fun! Harrison loves exercise!
49:44Where are all these bears coming from?
49:47Oh, you! Where are you?
49:49Hey, did you get any more of them talking bears in?
49:52Oh, hey! We certainly do!
49:53Oh, man! Everybody's got one but me! Can I have one?
49:56Yes, you can.
49:57Yes, you can.
49:58Hi, I'm Larry the Loser Bear.
50:00Get her done.
50:02Hey, that ain't a Harrison Bear.
50:03That's a me bear.
50:04Why, this is the second most popular toy
50:06amongst the coveted five to ten-year-old age demographic.
50:09Second most?
50:10What's the most popular?
50:12This one.
50:14Hi-de-ho.
50:15I'm Victor the Talking Bear.
50:16I'm the best dad ever,
50:18and I'll buy whatever your little heart desires.
50:23I love that one.
50:25Every kid in America wants one of these.
50:27A Victor Bear?
50:29Daddy, can I please have it?
50:31That's the thin.
50:32I want more than any thin for Christmas.
50:44I'm here at Town Hall
50:45where they're setting up a soup kitchen for the homeless.
50:48As you can see, there are some wonderful toys
50:50that will be handed out at noon today
50:53to needy boys and girls by none other.
50:55than Santa himself.
50:57Ho, ho, ho.
50:59Merry Christmas.
51:01Thank you, Santa.
51:02I'm Margot Price, Channel One News.
51:04Thanks, Margot.
51:05Oh, man.
51:07You could not be thinking what you're thinking right now.
51:31No Gill, Larry.
51:32Come on.
51:35No Gill, Larry.
51:37Come on.
51:39All right.
51:42Larry? Larry Phillips?
51:44Yeah.
51:45Is that you?
51:46Oh, hey, Janie. How's Trix?
51:49Good, good. I was just dropping off some presents to donate for the charity event.
51:54I haven't seen you since we graduated from high school.
51:57I know. It's been a long time. All right, then.
52:00Larry, don't give up.
52:02You know, it's bound to get better.
52:05Oh, no, Janie. I'm doing fine, really.
52:07These are, uh, these are just old clothes. It's wash day.
52:10I hope this isn't because I dumped you, Larry.
52:14Well, hold on a second. I kind of remember that differently. It was kind of mutual.
52:19Oh, okay. I have to go to church, but it was really good seeing you again.
52:24You too.
52:24And I'm sure this is all just a little rough patch, you know?
52:28And I just want you to be brave.
52:31I don't need money, Janie.
52:33Larry, there is no shame in accepting help.
52:37You poor, poor man.
52:39I don't...
52:41Bye.
52:4220 bucks?
52:43Boy, I'm in the wrong business.
52:48Ho, ho, ho, ho.
52:51Well, I think I got something very nice for you.
52:57Merry Christmas.
53:01I hear you want a doggie for Christmas.
53:04Ho, ho, ho.
53:05Well, we just happen to have one here.
53:09Here you go.
53:11Merry Christmas.
53:13Ho, ho, ho, ho.
53:15Oh.
53:17That's what makes it all worthwhile.
53:21Whoa.
53:22How you doing, Santa?
53:23Are you kidding me?
53:25You're cutting off the circulation in my legs.
53:28Come on.
53:28The real Santa Claus wouldn't care about stuff like that.
53:31Oh, yeah?
53:32Well, real Santa Claus is kind of busy this time of year, you might have noticed.
53:35Look, I'm here for my daughter.
53:37Oh, yeah?
53:38Why isn't she here herself?
53:40Well, I'll be honest with you.
53:40She's kind of scared of Santa Claus.
53:42How does a kid not like Santa Claus?
53:44Well, I don't know.
53:45I guess she must have sat on some Santa's lap that was sweating real bad and had bad breath
53:49and asked a lot of nosy questions.
53:51Okay, okay.
53:53Here you go.
53:54Ho, ho, this is for your daughter.
53:57She don't want that.
53:57She wants that Harrison bear.
53:58Can I get that Harrison bear?
54:00She's going to love the dog.
54:01Santa Claus, I am not leaving your lap until I get that Harrison bear.
54:04As a matter of fact, I had some Mexican food last night and it's starting to bubble up on me.
54:08You're going to give me that bear because if I explode on you, you're going to have to call Roto
54:11-Rooter for some backup.
54:12Oh, give this guy his bear.
54:15All right, give him his bear.
54:17Ha, ha!
54:19Oh, man, Santa Claus, you just made a dad and a little girl really happy.
54:24Oh, hi, I'm Harrison.
54:26I'm going for the bear.
54:27Woo!
54:27I got a bear.
54:30Ho, ho, ho, ho.
54:32I got a bear.
54:33I got a bear.
54:35Got me a Harrison bear.
54:36I can't believe I got a bear.
54:39Whoa, is that a Harrison bear?
54:41Sure is, buddy.
54:42I got it from my daughter.
54:43Oh, she sure is lucky.
54:46I wanted the same thing, but Daddy says Santa's on a tight budget this year.
54:51That's terrible.
54:52Well, maybe your Daddy will come up with something and you'll have a good Christmas this year.
54:57He can't.
54:58He doesn't get out of jail till Valentine's Day.
55:02He was just trying to steal enough money so Mom could get her operation.
55:07Man, that's really sad.
55:09Oh, well, I just hope Santa doesn't forget me on Christmas like he did last year and the year before
55:16that and the year before that.
55:23Hey, you're giving me your Harrison talking bear?
55:29Yeah, I figure since Santa's on a tight budget this year, I'll be Santa's helper.
55:35So, Merry Christmas.
55:39Sucker!
55:44And that's why some couples just have pets.
55:47I've been hacked.
55:49Hey, bring me back that bear!
55:53Come back in!
55:55Bring me back my bear!
56:02Excuse me.
56:03Sorry.
56:04Get out of here, sir!
56:14Get out of here, you little punk!
56:16Now give me that bear!
56:18Brat chance, Tubby!
56:19Tubby, come on.
56:20You know that's hurtful.
56:21I'm not Tubby.
56:22I'm Big Bone.
56:23Now give me that bear!
56:24Please, mister.
56:25Don't take my Harrison bear.
56:27I'm begging you.
56:30Oh, my kid, just give me the bear.
56:31I won't let you take my bear, no matter how much you threaten me.
56:35Hey, hey, what's going on here?
56:36Are you threatening this little boy?
56:38I'm not threatening that little punk.
56:40He tricked me out of that bear.
56:41It was a gift from my daddy.
56:43He was in jail.
56:44And he wants to take it away from me.
56:46That's real rich, kid.
56:47That's real rich.
56:48You're pretty good, you know?
56:50Larry, just because you've fallen on hard times, that's no excuse to steal from a child.
56:57No, y'all are misunderstanding the whole thing about what's happening here.
57:01Oh, I understand.
57:02I understand you should be put in jail.
57:04Come on, let's get him.
57:07Wait a minute.
57:08For the record, Janie, I dumped you.
57:13Oh, that's it.
57:14Let's get him!
57:15Let's get him!
57:17Let's get him!
57:33Nice work, kid.
57:35Fifty bucks is agreed.
57:38It'll be a hundred.
57:40We agreed on fifty.
57:41Delivery charges?
57:43Or do you want me to give it back to the doofus?
57:48I'm starting to feel like the doofus myself, kid.
57:51On three.
57:53One, two, three.
58:00Stupid bear.
58:01celebrator?
58:02Laughter.
58:03That's tickled!
58:05That tickle!
58:06Get back there!
58:06Get up!
58:08Come on!
58:09ao 왜 & fa e sbalg com!
58:09Get up!
58:10Get down!
58:10That tickle!
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