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00:00From Hollywood, it's Jimmy Kimmel Live!
00:04Tonight, Elizabeth Banks and Jimmy O'Yang
00:08with the Klee Tones!
00:11And now, Jimmy Kimmel!
00:41We are coming to you from our headquarters in Los Angeles,
00:45home of the 2028 Summer Olympic Games.
00:48I'm excited about the Olympics coming here.
00:50Guillermo, you and I, we're going to go to all the canoeing events,
00:54every one of them.
00:55You got it, Jimmy, yes.
00:56Even though the Olympics are more than two years away,
00:59we now have the official color palette of the games, finally.
01:04I've been waiting for this official color palette since they announced it.
01:08And here it is.
01:09They say it was inspired by the Super Bloom here in California,
01:12which is something I've never heard of.
01:15Can you smoke the Super Bloom? I don't know what that is.
01:18But put that back up, because hopefully President Trump's going to like it.
01:22I think he will.
01:23It's got the orange of his skin, the yellow of his hair,
01:28and the purple of his hand bruises.
01:31So we will learn more about the plan for the Olympics over the coming months.
01:38But I think I have a great idea for who should be the announcer at the opening ceremonies.
01:44Welcome, Albania, Antigua and Barbuda, Aruba, Bosnia and Herzegovina, Bangladesh, Belize and Bolivia,
01:58Burundi, Cabo Verde, Congo, Costa Rica, Dominican Republic, Ecuador, Equatorial Guinea, Estonia, France, Gambia, Georgia, Ghana and Guatemala here in
02:17Washington, D.C.
02:19You remember that, um...
02:22Remember the song...
02:25Kokomo by the Beach Boys?
02:26It would be fun to hear her do that, right?
02:29Well done, Melania.
02:30Oh, she's still going?
02:31Greetings, Israel, Kenya, Kosovo, Lithuania, Malta, Malawi, Montenegro, Morocco, Nigeria, North Macedonia, Palau, Panama, and of course, Paraguay.
02:49Of course, Paraguay.
02:50What are we, savages?
02:52Where are my Panamanians at?
02:54Why would they do this to her?
02:56I mean, why would they make her announce the names of all of the country?
03:00She could have just said, welcome everyone but Iran.
03:02Instead, they put her through a whole Duolingo.
03:07Oh, she's not finished?
03:08Hello, Poland, Romania, Senegal, Serbia, Seashells, Sierra Leone, Slovenia, St. Keats and Neves, Ukraine, and UAE.
03:24Oh, I guess Zimbabwe couldn't make it.
03:26It's probably for the best.
03:27And then at the end of the summit, she said goodbye to them all in reverse.
03:31It was amazing.
03:32Meanwhile, her husband was in Memphis yesterday.
03:34He took a VIP tour of Graceland while he was there.
03:38He invaded Graceland, and then Yelvis hosted a roundtable to catch us up on his efforts to crack down on
03:45crime,
03:45including the most heinous crime of all, putting your ballots in a mailbox.
03:49You know, brought to my attention today that we're the only country that does mail-in voting.
03:57Mail-in voting means mail-in cheating.
03:59I call it mail-in cheating.
04:00That's right.
04:01He prefers in-person cheating, preferably with a porn star shortly after his wife gives birth.
04:09And he keeps saying it was brought to his attention today that we're the only country that does mail-in
04:14voting.
04:15When is somebody going to step in and tell him that is not true?
04:1834 countries have mail-in voting.
04:21All the countries that have mail have mail-in voting.
04:25Okay, so here's where the real magic comes in.
04:28That was yesterday.
04:30Guess what he did today?
04:32Mail-in voting.
04:32That's right.
04:33He voted by mail today for the special election in Florida.
04:37He's unbelievable.
04:39He's really...
04:40Donald Trump claiming he wants to protect election integrity is like Bill Cosby telling you he'll watch your drink for
04:46you.
04:47Next, we're going to find out that his blow dryer is powered by a windmill or something.
04:53You know, I mentioned this last week and now it is official.
04:56The Trump administration is shelling out a billion dollars of our money to a French energy company to cancel construction
05:04of wind turbines in North Carolina and New York.
05:07He's paying this company to not build these renewable energy farms because he has this weird hatred of what he
05:15calls windmills.
05:16He says they're unsightly, they're ugly monsters, they're losers, a con job, they're bad for the environment, and they make
05:23a lot of noise, which is exactly how most of us feel about him.
05:29And so, this is interesting.
05:33Do you know where the windmill was invented?
05:36It was invented in Iran.
05:39Persians invented the windmill between 500 and 900 AD, and now he wants to destroy them for it, I guess.
05:46The man-boob of La Mancha again declared victory in Iran today.
05:50He said, this war has been won, and yet we're still fighting it.
05:54Or are we?
05:55We don't know.
05:55According to the president, there were some major progress yesterday thanks to a mysterious gift.
06:01Do you think I trust them?
06:02I don't trust them.
06:03Then why bother talking to them?
06:05Because they're going to make a deal.
06:07They're going to make a deal.
06:08They did something yesterday that was amazing, actually.
06:11They gave us a present, and the president arrived today.
06:15It was a very big present worth a tremendous amount of money.
06:20And I'm not going to tell you what that present is, but it is a very significant prize.
06:29And they gave it to us, and they said they were going to give it.
06:32So that meant one thing to me would deal with the right people.
06:35A prize?
06:36They gave them either a present or a prize.
06:39What kind of present did they send?
06:41Did they give them a Vitamix?
06:42I mean, is he sure it's safe to open this present when he gets it?
06:47Who would have ever guessed he could be easily manipulated by expensive gifts?
06:52Maybe they gave him a medal that says world's greatest enemy or something.
06:55I don't know.
06:56I can't wait to find out what this incredibly valuable prize could be.
07:01You know, one thing we can be grateful for is that the president surrounds himself with
07:05great minds like the former mayor of New York, Rudy Giuliani, who gave us this update
07:10on the plan to reopen the Strait of Hormuz.
07:15Hormuz is still closed.
07:18We're going to just close off with some kind of a...
07:28We're going to close off with just a...
07:34Well, with just a what?
07:36What kind of...
07:36Mayor Giuliani?
07:38What are we going to close off with?
07:42Mayor Giuliani, can you hear me?
07:46Mayor Giuliani, you're on television right now.
07:48You're still on.
07:50The show is still on.
07:52Hello?
07:53I think we're watching the first ever human buffering before our eyes.
07:58Mayor...
07:59Rudy!
08:01Rudy!
08:02We'll see.
08:04Okay, he's back.
08:05All right.
08:06You know what?
08:06We're going to take 10 seconds for station identification.
08:08You're watching the Nursing Home Podcast Network.
08:12Rudy Giuliani might not be with us much longer, but...
08:17Don't worry.
08:19Trump's got a whole new generation of thinkers lined up,
08:22including his newly confirmed Secretary of Homeland Security,
08:26Mark Wayne, Chuck Mike, Bruce Dave Mullen.
08:30Maybe Mullen's better.
08:31He is the now former senator of Oklahoma.
08:34Before he was elected to the Senate,
08:36Mark Wayne Mullen was a low-level MMA fighter and a plumber.
08:41That's right.
08:41We have a plumber protecting us from terrorism now.
08:45It worked for Super Mario.
08:47Why not, Mark Wayne?
08:49But honestly, I mean...
08:51If Trump is going to keep picking these unqualified people
08:55to run the department, why not have more fun with them?
08:58I mean, next time, instead of Mark Wayne,
09:00how about Little Wayne for Homeland Security?
09:03At least we could get a concert out of it, right?
09:06Mullen is replacing Kristi Noem,
09:08who was ousted three weeks ago and will never be seen again.
09:11Today, Trump hosted a...
09:14A swearing-in ceremony for Mark Wayne and his Mullenettes
09:18where he shared his thoughts on what is surely
09:20the greatest threat to our Homeland Security.
09:22Anybody in your family want men to play in women's sports?
09:26I don't think so, Jim, right?
09:28How would they do?
09:29Would they do good wrestling you?
09:30They would be in trouble?
09:32Yes.
09:32He said, yes, they'd be in trouble.
09:34It's so crazy.
09:35Transgender mutilization of children.
09:38We don't want that.
09:38Men playing in women's sports.
09:40Men in women's sports.
09:42Transgender for everyone.
09:44They want men to be able to play in women's sports.
09:46They want transgender for everybody.
09:49Terrible.
09:50Terrible.
09:50It always goes back to transgender.
09:52Every time he opens his mouth, he can turn a wedding toast
09:55into a rant about penises.
09:57Is it possible he's trying to tell us he wants to be a woman deep down inside?
10:02I don't know.
10:03Why do you keep bringing this up?
10:06And the best part is, the guy Jim he was talking to was Mark Wayne Mullen's son.
10:11Or daughter, if they're not careful.
10:13They really have to.
10:14Elsewhere in Washington, the Senate Judiciary Committee today had a hearing on their investigation
10:20of the investigation of Trump's efforts to overthrow the election.
10:24It's called Operation Arctic Frost, which is not a flavor of Gatorade.
10:29It is the code name for Jack Smith's probe into Trump's shenanigans in 2020.
10:34The DOJ subpoenaed the phone records of a number of prominent Republican politicians,
10:39including Sweaty Teddy Cruz, who was highly upset.
10:43The FBI took the cell phone data of nearly 20% of the Republicans in the Senate.
10:49Such invasive subpoenas were granted by Judge Boesburg.
10:53And Judge Boesburg signed those orders like he was printing the menu at a Denny's.
11:03Signed them like he was printing a menu at a Denny's.
11:08Who prints the menu at a Denny's?
11:11They come laminated.
11:13This simile makes no sense.
11:15Please, Ted, explain this in human tongue, because we don't know.
11:19What does Denny's have anything to do with any of this?
11:22Are you saying you're hungry for pancakes?
11:24Because if so, we'll get you some scrambled eggs.
11:27I don't know.
11:27Meanwhile, none of these guys are screaming about the fact that we still haven't seen all the Trump Epstein files.
11:33We were spiked by December.
11:37You know, Jeffrey Epstein lived primarily in Palm Beach, Florida,
11:40conveniently located near his friend at Mar-a-Lago.
11:43And the fallout from his activities have impacted a lot of people,
11:47including this local Palm Beach lookalike.
11:49Hey, everybody, this is Palm Beach Pete, and my video went viral
11:54because some dude randomly filmed me while I was driving on I-95, unbeknownst to me.
12:00And the next thing I know, I'm a viral sensation.
12:04It's pretty crazy.
12:05Thanks.
12:06So you're not Jeffrey Epstein?
12:07I'm not Jeffrey Epstein.
12:08I'm Palm Beach Pete.
12:10That a boy, yeah.
12:12Okay.
12:13Peace out.
12:14Peace out, Palm Beach Pete.
12:16Oh, this poor guy.
12:16And I don't know what happened after that video, but whatever it was,
12:20he felt the need to clarify once again that he is not the president's former BF Jeff.
12:26Good morning, everybody.
12:27This is Palm Beach Pete from Palm Beach, Florida.
12:31I want to thank everybody for the positive comments I got from saying,
12:36I'm not Jeffrey Epstein.
12:38I'm just Palm Beach Pete going to play some tennis today, going into town, have lunch.
12:44I'm so not Jeffrey Epstein.
12:46I'm just me being me.
12:47And it's a crazy phenomenon that has went really viral.
12:52And I really appreciate all the support.
12:54And just want to reiterate, I'm Peter from Palm Beach.
12:58I have nothing to do with Jeffrey Epstein.
13:01He's a very bad person.
13:02What he did, obviously, and he is dead.
13:06Well, I don't know.
13:08That's what a Jeffrey Epstein who faked his own death would say, right?
13:14I mean, I don't know what life is like for a Jeffrey Epstein lookalike who lives in Palm Beach,
13:19but I really wanted to find out.
13:20So we tracked him down.
13:21And please say hello now to Palm Beach Pete, who is standing by.
13:25Hi, Pete.
13:28Thank you for taking time away from tennis in town to join us.
13:33When did you first realize you were a doppelganger for Epstein?
13:37It's been going on for a while, but it really went out of control when he got arrested
13:41and it was on the front page of every major magazine and newspaper.
13:46Do people actually mistake you for him?
13:50They give me the double look.
13:51But now that it's gone viral, Jimmy, it's nonstop.
13:56They want to take pictures of me, my autograph.
14:00But as Palm Beach Pete, I'm not Epstein.
14:02I'm just Palm Beach Pete living my life.
14:05Now, Palm Beach Pete, can you prove you aren't Epstein?
14:10Do you, I mean, do you have any wonderful secrets?
14:12Is there anything that you could say to convince us that you are not Jeffrey Epstein?
14:17I'm totally not Jeffrey Epstein.
14:19He's dead.
14:20So you want people to know, even though there's a strong resemblance between you
14:24and you live where he lived, that you are not Jeffrey Epstein?
14:28100%, Jimmy.
14:29I have nothing to do with him.
14:30Jeffrey Epstein is not a name you answer to, have ever answered to,
14:35or plan on answering to in the future.
14:38No, Palm Beach Pete, that's who I am, living my life.
14:41So, Pete, if somebody were to come up to you and say, hey, look, it's Jeffrey Epstein,
14:47you would say, no, I am not.
14:49I would say, yeah, dude, I've heard it a lot of times.
14:52I'm Palm Beach Pete living my life.
14:54So if I were to point at, let's say Jeffrey Epstein was still alive, and I were to point at
14:57him,
14:57and then I were to point at you, those fingers would be pointing in totally different directions, right?
15:04No, I'm the better looking guy.
15:06Uh-huh.
15:08You are.
15:09You are.
15:10Open man, Jimmy.
15:12You woke up this morning, you looked in the mirror, you did not see Jeffrey Epstein,
15:16and you have never seen Jeffrey Epstein in the mirror.
15:19I just see me, but I know there's a strong resemblance there, Jimmy.
15:23Yes, and your position is that Jeffrey Epstein is not, in fact, you.
15:28Correct, I'm Palm Beach Pete living my life.
15:30You're Palm Beach Pete.
15:31Now, Palm Beach Pete, would you be willing to play Jeffrey Epstein in a film, a movie,
15:36maybe even a Hallmark Christmas kind of thing?
15:39I'm open to all opportunities if they're right.
15:42Okay, so your stance is that Jeffrey Epstein is not me.
15:47I am not he.
15:48You are Palm Beach Pete, who is, in fact, an entirely different person than Jeffrey Epstein.
15:54Correct, Jimmy.
15:55So what you would like us to take away from this is that if this was a Venn diagram,
16:03there's a circle here that is you and there's a circle here that is Jeffrey Epstein,
16:07there's no overlap whatsoever between, because you are not Jeffrey Epstein.
16:14That's correct.
16:15That's correct.
16:15I am not Jeffrey Epstein.
16:17I'm Palm Beach Pete.
16:18Good.
16:19All right.
16:19I just want to make that clear.
16:22Yeah, I thank you for not being Jeffrey Epstein.
16:26And by the way, we have a gift for you that maybe you want to do something with and share
16:30with your fans.
16:31We made you a t-shirt, and I'm going to send this to you.
16:34It's for people who love Palm Beach Pete but want nothing to do with Jeffrey Epstein.
16:41What do you think?
16:43I love it.
16:44It's fantastic.
16:45You guys are the best.
16:46It's going to be yours very soon, Palm Beach Pete.
16:48We will send this right away.
16:50And thank you once again.
16:52My pleasure.
16:54I'm killing it, Jimmy.
16:57All right.
16:58And we have one more tidbit from Florida before we go.
17:02It's time once again for another edition of This Week in Florida.
17:08Here in Florida, you can still marry your cousin.
17:14God bless our silly estate.
17:16We have a fun show for you tonight.
17:18Jimmy O. Yang is here.
17:19And we'll be right back with Elizabeth Bates.
17:34Hi there.
17:35Welcome back to the show tonight.
17:36A funny man who has a new stand-up comedy special called Jimmy O. Yang.
17:40Finally home.
17:41Jimmy O. Yang is with us tonight.
17:43Florida will be joined by Niall Horan and Aaron Moriarty.
17:48So join us for that.
17:49Our first guest tonight you know from many huge movies and now a tiny TV show.
17:55The Miniature Wife premieres on Peacock April 9th.
17:58Please welcome Elizabeth Banks.
18:14Hey.
18:15Wait.
18:16I just have to get one thing straight.
18:18OK.
18:18Go ahead.
18:18That was not Jeffrey Epstein?
18:21That was not Jeffrey Epstein.
18:22No.
18:22A lot of people think it was.
18:24But he's claiming that it is not.
18:26That he is not Jeffrey Epstein.
18:28Not.
18:28Not Jeffrey Epstein.
18:29OK.
18:30OK.
18:30We'll clear that up.
18:31I'm glad you made it clear.
18:32Because it seemed unclear to some people like Guillermo who was thinking about tequila on
18:36his stool.
18:39By the way, your entrance was very fast and I appreciate it.
18:42Do you know why?
18:42Because I'm wearing the tallest shoes of all time.
18:44And I was like, no, thank you.
18:47So I have to shimmy my way out here.
18:50Wouldn't that be an excuse to go slow instead of fast?
18:53No.
18:53It's like I just want to get to the chair.
18:55OK.
18:56All right.
18:57Good.
18:57Well, welcome to the chair.
18:58How are you doing?
18:59I'm doing great.
19:00I heard you brought one of your kids here tonight.
19:02I did.
19:02Well, you know, I'm not particularly cool to my kids.
19:05But you are, Jimmy.
19:07Oh, that's good.
19:08Will they tell my kids that I'm cool?
19:10Because they don't think I'm cool at all.
19:12Well, then you know how I feel.
19:14Yeah, yeah, yeah.
19:14Exactly.
19:14Well, that's typical.
19:15Yeah, yeah.
19:16They like Jimmy O. Yang, too.
19:17So they're excited.
19:18Oh, great.
19:18Oh, it's a big Jimmy night for the kids.
19:20Lots of Jimmy.
19:21How old is your son this year?
19:2315.
19:23He just turned 15 last week.
19:25Oh, he did.
19:25Oh, that's nice.
19:26Is that hard?
19:27A year from driving.
19:28Because you have two teenage boys.
19:29I have two teenagers now.
19:31I have a 13 and 15-year-old.
19:33Yes, and I'm like their worst nightmare mom.
19:34I'm the mom that's like, so you know about sex, right?
19:38And you know about tampons.
19:39And you know you have to buy tampons if you get a girlfriend.
19:42And they're like, oh, my God, that's too much.
19:45What?
19:46I was like, yeah.
19:46You have to buy tampons if you get a girlfriend?
19:49You have never bought your beautiful wife.
19:52I bought my wife tampons.
19:54Right.
19:55Never have I bought a girlfriend tampon.
19:57Oh.
19:57OK.
19:58Your serious girlfriend.
19:59OK.
20:00I'll change it to serious girlfriend.
20:01How about that?
20:02You mean like you're supposed to show up with them,
20:04like on Valentine's Day?
20:06Like flowers.
20:07Like a bouquet of flowers.
20:09I just want to make sure I didn't miss a rule
20:10somewhere along the line.
20:12No.
20:12I did buy tampons.
20:13You know what?
20:14I have purchased tampons for my wife.
20:16Yeah.
20:17And I always buy the wrong ones.
20:18And in fact, I went to a supermarket in the middle of,
20:22almost the middle of the night, because she needed them.
20:24Yeah.
20:24And I got to this, you know, there's hundreds of choices.
20:29Yeah, there's a lot of choices.
20:29Which I was not told about prior to the visit to the supermarket.
20:33And there was a woman in the aisle looking at him.
20:37And I had this moment where I'm like, am I going to ask for help?
20:41And seem like the weirdest creep imaginable.
20:45Did you?
20:45And no, I did not.
20:46And guess what I did?
20:48Brought the wrong tampons.
20:49Why didn't, OK.
20:50Why didn't you buy every box of tampons?
20:54It never occurred.
20:54I don't know.
20:55I just got the wrong ones.
20:56I just want to go, one of these, one of these, one of these, one of these.
20:59Just to be safe, Jimmy.
21:00You've got to be safe.
21:01And we were on vacation.
21:02It was a long drive.
21:03And so I went back and I gave her the thing.
21:05And she said, this is not what I needed at all.
21:08And I washed my hands of the whole situation.
21:10OK, well, I'm glad my son's heard that you've gone.
21:12Oh, your son left about four minutes ago.
21:15When you said, when you told America.
21:17He ran.
21:18Yeah, he got the hell out of here.
21:20He ran down Hollywood Boulevard.
21:21Have you given the, did you give him the sex talk?
21:23Or did your husband do that?
21:24No, we did it pretty early on.
21:27How early?
21:27I think, well, we did, you know, I find you have to go in stages.
21:31So you've got to introduce some things.
21:33Like, they don't want to know really about sex.
21:35They want to know where they're from.
21:36Like, where did I come from?
21:37And how do you get, where are babies?
21:39And what are kittens?
21:40And I like to remind people that you can talk about where
21:43babies come from with animals.
21:45Because mammals all do it the same.
21:47Well, that's a good idea.
21:48Yeah, and so when my son finally asked,
21:51but mom, how does the penis get in the vagina from the backseat of the car?
21:56Ah.
21:57Well, my husband went in to get a coffee at the coffee shop.
22:00And we were on Cape Cod on vacation.
22:02And I was like, oh, wow, it's happening right now.
22:05Okay.
22:05This is it.
22:06And my little one sort of sat up like, I know what's going on.
22:09I didn't ask that question, but I'd like to know the answer, too.
22:12And I remember we were talking about going on a whale watch.
22:15So I started talking about whale penises.
22:20And those are like the biggest ones, I think.
22:23That's what I hear.
22:25And how whales, there's a screensaver on the TV of whales, like, just dancing in the water.
22:33And I was like, you know that screensaver? That's the whales. They're doing it.
22:39And I literally think I did do the actual, like, this.
22:42Like, at one point.
22:44And they were like, right, okay.
22:46So, I don't know.
22:47That's pretty good.
22:48They ended up talking about whale, like, kittens and puppies and, you know,
22:52they all have penises.
22:54Did it ruin the movie Free Willy for them?
22:56Were they able to watch that?
22:59I think they felt really good about how Free Willy was.
23:02Do you have, is it spring break for your kids right now, or no?
23:05It is spring break, yeah.
23:07So, do you make a plan for spring break?
23:09Because there is a lot of pressure now to make a plan for spring break.
23:12And I don't recall, as a kid, ever having, I don't remember a single spring break.
23:17Yeah, what was spring break?
23:18It was, you were at home.
23:20Yeah, that's what we did, too.
23:21That's it.
23:21I mean, maybe we went on a lot of car trips to visit family.
23:25That was my entire, every vacation that I ever took as a kid,
23:29was just get in the car and we're going to go visit some family.
23:32And then when we got there and they said, and we would go like,
23:36what are we doing?
23:36We're not doing anything.
23:37They go, we're visiting.
23:38That's what we're doing.
23:39It's a visit.
23:40And I tell my kids that now.
23:41And we go to people's houses and we sit around and chit chat and eat food and drink.
23:45And they're like, why aren't we doing something?
23:47I'm like, this is what we're doing.
23:48This is the whole thing.
23:50We're visiting.
23:51Right.
23:51So yeah, I went on a lot of car trips to visit relatives.
23:54You're doing it electively, though.
23:56I feel like our parents maybe were doing it to avoid paying for a motel.
24:01A million percent.
24:02Right.
24:02There was no, yeah, of course.
24:03That's the only reason.
24:05All vacations were just like, we'll pay for gas.
24:08And like, that's it.
24:09And everything else, hopefully, like, we'll go to granddad's house and he'll take us out
24:14to dinner at Bonanza.
24:15Yeah, you're right.
24:16You know what I mean?
24:17And like, that was going to be the vacation.
24:20Yeah.
24:20And every once in a while, we had, we did have aunts who lived in Florida who had a pool.
24:25Nice.
24:25And we used to go and swim and come home just bright red.
24:29Like, beets red.
24:31Like, completely unwatched in the 80s.
24:33Yeah.
24:33Like a whale out there humping its, you know.
24:36Wow.
24:37OK.
24:37I put it in your mind.
24:39It's in your mind, I know.
24:39Yeah, I'm thinking about it now.
24:40Because I am thinking about the kind of specifics, the mechanics of it.
24:45And it makes sense that the whale would have to be very well endowed.
24:49Because otherwise, how do you keep that going?
24:52Well, because they don't, there's no, like, gravity holding anything in place.
24:56They're just floating around, you know?
24:58Right.
24:59And they need...
24:59I agree.
25:00They need some connection there.
25:02Well, but also, the woman has to be very accepting, right?
25:06It's really on her.
25:07Yeah.
25:07Well, I've heard that female whales, which are called fee whales, did you know that?
25:12Yes, that's a scientific term for them.
25:16Are very cool, you know, like that.
25:18Oh, yeah.
25:18Yeah, they're super cool.
25:19They're cool chicks.
25:20Yeah, yeah.
25:22Whales.
25:23Yeah, I have to tell...
25:24My wife has told me that I am going to be telling our eight-year-old son.
25:29OK.
25:30Billy, yeah.
25:30But you have adult children with your grandkids, don't you?
25:34I'm glad you mentioned that.
25:35I have a granddaughter, yes.
25:36Right, so you really must have had to say where your grandchild came from.
25:40No, he never even...
25:42The hospital is where the grandchild came from.
25:45But I have a new thing I'm going to try to start.
25:48I'm so glad you mentioned my older son, because I explained this to my older son, Kevin.
25:53Yeah.
25:54And now I feel that it should be his responsibility.
25:58So whoever you have to, in your life, tell one person...
26:02Right.
26:02...where, how babies were made.
26:04And then that person, whoever you choose, that person has to tell a selected person.
26:10I'm interested in that, passing on this knowledge.
26:13Yeah.
26:13This human...
26:14By the way, most basic human knowledge that we all need to survive the human race.
26:20I don't know.
26:20Yeah, eating and drinking are a little more basic, but I think...
26:23I mean...
26:23Yeah, no.
26:24Oh, I'm glad you support this, and I'm going to mention that it is approved by you.
26:28It's approved by me.
26:28It's approved plan.
26:29When we come back, we're going to see a clip from your new show, which is called The Miniature Wife.
26:34Elizabeth Banks is here.
26:42Merry Christmas, Lindy.
26:44Les, do I look merry or hungry?
26:47Well, it's kind of hard to tell from this distance.
26:50Um...
26:51I'm not.
26:52Make me big again, now.
26:54Heard that, loud and clear.
26:56Um...
26:57The thing is...
26:58Tell me!
26:59You can make me big again, Les!
27:00I can.
27:01And I will.
27:02Um, the thing is that it's just...
27:04I think it's just going to take a day, uh, or two.
27:08Tops.
27:08But you'll be fine.
27:10Everything's going to be okay.
27:11You're healthy.
27:11I checked your vitals.
27:13Wait!
27:13I could die?!
27:15Tiny?!
27:16That is Matthew McFadden and Elizabeth Banks in The Miniature Wife, which you can see
27:22on, uh, April 9th.
27:24All the episodes come out on Peacock.
27:26That's right.
27:26Man, husbands are always shrinking their wives, aren't they?
27:30I did love that this was a study of a relationship, and it is a bit about how we minimize
27:38each other's
27:39problems in that relationship.
27:40This is a sort of absurdist lens on that notion of feeling small, you know, with someone that
27:47you love.
27:48This couple's been married a really long time.
27:50He's a crazy scientist.
27:51He accidentally shrinks me, and it's sort of like, what's going to happen then?
27:56And he can't make me big right away.
27:59Did he intentionally shrink the turkey, too, so you would have something to eat?
28:02He did.
28:03All of those things in an effort to appease me when I'm just like, I just want this
28:07to be over immediately, and he's like, I can't.
28:10Seems so wasteful to spend, like, whatever, $80, $100 on a turkey and then shrink it down
28:15to tiny size.
28:16But if your wife was tiny and yelling at you, you would do whatever you can.
28:19I'd probably just give her a little piece of the giant one, but it looked better that
28:22way.
28:23She did some of that, too.
28:24Some of the things you had are actual giant props, right?
28:28Yeah.
28:28Well, so what was so wild, because that's all, a lot of what I did was on a green screen,
28:31but yeah.
28:32Oh, my goodness.
28:33That's sweet.
28:35Well, this is very meaningful.
28:36Inside a water bottle.
28:37Because...
28:38The Fiji water bottle!
28:39This guy's from Fiji.
28:41That's right.
28:41And little did me know, it would be represented in a giant bottle.
28:45There it is.
28:46So, some of the props that they made, because otherwise I was on this green screen having
28:51to imagine so much of the world around me.
28:53So these incredible artisans built me life-size huge props.
28:58That's me.
28:59At one point, my character jumps onto a toilet plunger, because it's a classy show.
29:04You know, that's...
29:05What happened to that prop?
29:07That's a 20-foot tall toilet plunger.
29:09Can you send that to the White House?
29:10Hello!
29:13I would love to have that.
29:15I would like to mail that to the White House.
29:18You put it right on top, right where that dome happens, you know?
29:21And just the boop-boop!
29:22Check it all out.
29:24What else do we have here?
29:24That would drain the swamp.
29:26Oh, look at that.
29:27That's fun.
29:27That's the iPhone charger right there that I have to climb up and get.
29:30So it was really fun.
29:31As you can see though, everything else was green.
29:34So I'm having to imagine, you know, you're walking around the salt and pepper shaker.
29:37I'm like, okay, sure guys.
29:38You know, I was like the least mentally prepared I've ever been for a job, was doing this job.
29:43I just didn't quite understand how vulnerable I was going to feel standing on a stage, just
29:49surrounded by green, having to imagine everything while like Joe was walking to craft service,
29:53like right there.
29:54Do you know what I mean?
29:55Yeah, right.
29:56And the cat is coming and I'm like, okay, you know what guys, can we just maybe not all
30:00go to craft service while I'm literally trying to imagine the entire world that I'm living
30:05in inside my brain.
30:06Were you nervous inside that water bottle?
30:09No, the back.
30:10I could get out the back.
30:11Oh, you can get out the back.
30:11I could get out the back.
30:12All right.
30:12So it wasn't all that.
30:13It wasn't too terrifying.
30:14And that, could we put that phone charger up again?
30:16Because I'm concerned about the fact that that is a lightning cable you have there.
30:20And you now switch to USB-C.
30:23It's true.
30:23It seems like your husband, if he's this technical genius.
30:27Why do I have an old phone?
30:28I know.
30:28Yeah, why does he have an iPhone 12?
30:30You know?
30:34It's a good note, Jimmy.
30:36It's a good note.
30:36I don't know where you were in production.
30:37Yeah, no.
30:38Good note.
30:38I was here, sitting at the desk.
30:40Yeah.
30:40No.
30:40Well, it's great to see you.
30:42Please give my best to your son, who thinks I'm cool.
30:45Yeah.
30:45And the show is called The Miniature Wife.
30:47All the episodes premiere April 9th on Peacock.
30:50Elizabeth Banks, everybody.
30:51We'll be right back with Jimmy L.
30:53This week on Jimmy Kimmel Live, Charlie Puth, David Cross, Aaron Moriarty, and Niall Horan.
31:19Hi there.
31:19Welcome back.
31:21Our next guest took a 13-hour flight from Hong Kong to be with us tonight.
31:26He has a new stand-up comedy special.
31:28It's called Jimmy O. Yang, Finally Home.
31:30Opens in theaters on Friday, just like Taylor Swift.
31:33Please welcome Jimmy O. Yang.
31:51How was, by the way, how was your flight from Hong Kong?
31:54Man, it was great.
31:55I'm very jet-lagged right now.
31:57You are.
31:57I was gone for a week, and I forgot how much of a dumpster fire I was going to come
32:01back
32:01to.
32:02Oh, right.
32:02At the airports.
32:03And they took away the only thing that's good about airports, TSA PreCheck.
32:06It's gone.
32:07Oh, really?
32:08PreCheck is gone?
32:09I didn't realize that.
32:09In a lot of places, it's gone.
32:11They're understaffed.
32:12And I don't know how they have money for everything else but PreCheck.
32:15That is the only thing that's good at any American airport.
32:21Like, they have money for everything.
32:23They have money to fly the Venezuelan president in a Black Hawk in first class back here.
32:30Give him some new Nike tech wear, you know?
32:33But no money to just hire one guy at PreCheck.
32:36That literally just looks at a check mark.
32:38That's like, yeah, go ahead.
32:39Yeah.
32:40No money for that guy.
32:41So, but it was the airport in Hong Kong.
32:43They're still running normally, and they run better than ours?
32:45Great.
32:46Everything very efficient in Hong Kong.
32:47Interesting.
32:47Interesting.
32:48Now, you are, for those who don't know, you moved from Hong Kong when you were, what,
32:5213 years old?
32:53Yeah, 13.
32:54You were born there.
32:55You were raised for much of your life there.
32:57You moved here to the United States.
32:59And this was, this special you did, it was a big, big homecoming for you.
33:04Yeah.
33:05I haven't been home in Hong Kong in 20 years.
33:08Yeah.
33:08And that's why it's called Finally Home.
33:10And I didn't know the reception I was going to get.
33:12I was like, you know, my brain, I feel like you as an immigrant, half of it was in Hong
33:18Kong and half of it's here.
33:19And I forgot all of my Hong Kong memories.
33:21I forgot.
33:21This is one very sobering thing that happened.
33:23I found my diary that I wrote when I was nine years old in Hong Kong, all written in
33:28Chinese.
33:28And I can't read a single word of it.
33:30No.
33:31Really?
33:32It's my first language and I couldn't read it.
33:34That's when I was like, I need to go back and touch.
33:36And get somebody to read it to you.
33:37Yeah.
33:38Yeah.
33:38I had to give it to my dad to translate it for me.
33:41Did you?
33:41And my dad's reading my childhood diary just laughing like.
33:47Now you have this big, big show.
33:49Obviously you did get a big reception because you saw, how many seats did you have in this
33:53theater?
33:54It was the Hong Kong Coliseum, 8,000 seats and we sold out five shows there.
33:59That's crazy.
34:01Yeah.
34:02And I never had that.
34:04I mean, thanks to everyone, you know, in America, around the world, my ticket sales
34:08are great.
34:08Like I sold out The Forum.
34:09I sold out Radio City this year.
34:11It was like super, it's been like such an incredible tour.
34:14But like in Hong Kong, tickets will sell in like 20 seconds.
34:17Oh, really?
34:17Like literally like Taylor Swift, like it'll crash the site and it's a whole thing.
34:21Yeah.
34:21So you make this entry.
34:23We have the entrance.
34:24Let's share the entrance if we can.
34:29I'm Michael Jackson there.
34:30Yeah, you really do.
34:32It's like a Cirque du Soleil caliber entrance you made there.
34:36Yeah.
34:38But you have to for a big show, right?
34:40That's something you want to do for a big, big show.
34:42I want to do something special, you know, like beyond just a comedy special, what else
34:47can I add to it?
34:47And that move popping up from the bottom of the stage was always too expensive in America.
34:52Really?
34:52But we figured out we can amortize it between five shows in Hong Kong.
34:55Uh-huh.
34:56And then I did it twice or maybe three times in every show, just so each time doesn't
35:01cost as much.
35:02I see.
35:03You know, I did the math on it.
35:04If you're gonna spend the money as much as well, use it, you know?
35:07You mentioned your dad reading your diary.
35:09You, I think the last time you were here, your parents were here with you.
35:12My parents was hanging out with your parents, had a great time.
35:13That's right.
35:14And your parents, you talk a lot about your parents in your act.
35:17Your parents are funny.
35:18Yeah.
35:19Well, yeah.
35:20Yeah.
35:21It's a lot of childhood trauma that I've translated into comedy.
35:24Right.
35:25Exactly.
35:25They were with you in Hong Kong for the big show.
35:28In Hong Kong.
35:28That must have been a crazy experience for them.
35:31Incredible experience.
35:32They were sitting in the audience and I don't do meet and greets in my shows, but people
35:35were like lining up to take pictures of my dad.
35:38Really?
35:38He was the celebrity there.
35:40But not your mom.
35:41Well, my mom's low key, you know?
35:43Uh-huh.
35:43And I haven't really shown my mom in any of the videos except this time.
35:46So a lot of the jokes, whenever I'm talking about my dad, my mom, we cut to them in the
35:51audience.
35:52So it's like you're seeing comedy in 3D, what their reaction is.
35:55Yeah.
35:55You know?
35:55Were they at all five shows?
35:57They were three out of the five.
35:59Three out of the five.
35:59They said.
36:00My dad asked me, he's like, which show do you have the most celebrities?
36:03I'll come to that one.
36:04Oh, really?
36:05Yeah.
36:06Is your mother worried that your dad might get too famous and start, you know, groupies
36:10might start following him around?
36:12She's hoping someone would just take him out of the house.
36:14Oh, really?
36:14Okay.
36:15All right.
36:15I'm pretty sure.
36:16Um, you, uh, you paid tribute to some of your childhood friends and these are people
36:21you grew up with in Hong Kong.
36:23Are these kids you stayed, or adults now, that you stayed in touch with?
36:27Uh, actually we lost touch for a good 15 years.
36:30Cause when I came to this country, I was 1999 and we didn't have, you know, uh, any of
36:36those technology.
36:36No FaceTime, not even AOL back then.
36:39You know?
36:39Not even the internet.
36:40Uh, not in my house.
36:41So we fully lost touch for 15 years.
36:43And then I did Arsenio Hall show when he came back.
36:47Right.
36:47It was my first late night talk show.
36:49I did stand up.
36:49And then my friend saw me.
36:50He's like, Oh Yang, that's a very rare last name in Chinese.
36:53And he's talking about he's from Hong Kong.
36:55Is that him?
36:55They found me on Facebook.
36:56And that's how we got back in touch with my elementary school friends.
36:59Yeah.
36:59That's great.
37:00And are they just so excited that you've become this big star?
37:04Yeah.
37:04It's lovely.
37:05Um, I was just hanging out with them.
37:07And, and yeah, they're still like really, really close friends.
37:09Do they ever come to visit here?
37:11They haven't yet.
37:12They haven't yet.
37:13Oh, that would be something, huh?
37:14Show them around here.
37:15Yeah.
37:16Um, did you get like a million ticket requests going back home?
37:20Yes.
37:20That was one thing that was quite overwhelming.
37:23I had like families coming out of the woodwork.
37:24Right.
37:24You know, um, after like, not for money, just for tickets.
37:28Right.
37:28Which is nice.
37:29You know, like after every show, I have to go like, say hi to like the celebrities that
37:34showed up, you know, uh, the promoters and everyone.
37:36Uh-huh.
37:37But also just so many families and half of them I haven't met.
37:39They're like, this is your uncle.
37:41And that's your uncle's uncle.
37:42That's your uncle's new wife.
37:43I'm like, I don't know.
37:45I'm just gonna call everybody an uncle.
37:47Everybody's uncle, yeah.
37:47Yeah.
37:48Um, but my actual uncle actually helped me out.
37:51My uncle William, gotta shout him out.
37:52Um, he, he organized all the tickets.
37:55So in Hong Kong, at least at the Hong Kong Coliseum, it's not digital tickets you can transfer.
37:59He had to go grab like 200 physical tickets.
38:02Oh, the hard tickets.
38:03Yeah.
38:03And he had to plan it.
38:04Who's sitting where?
38:05It's like a wedding, you know?
38:07Yeah.
38:07So he had to grab it.
38:08And then on his way to, you know, his house with tickets, all 200 tickets, he left it
38:13in a taxi.
38:14Oh.
38:14Oh no.
38:15Yeah.
38:15And it's not an, like not an Uber you can call.
38:18It's like a taxi.
38:18So he had to call dispatch.
38:20And finally he got the, he got the tickets back.
38:22Uh.
38:22Oh, he did?
38:23Luckily because the taxi driver didn't know who I was.
38:25So.
38:25Oh, that's fortunate.
38:26Yeah.
38:26Otherwise he would have sold the tickets, you know.
38:29But a part of me was hoping, uh, all the tickets would have been lost.
38:32So at least I would have some.
38:33You would have less people to meet and greet afterwards.
38:35Yeah.
38:36Exactly.
38:36Yeah.
38:36No, I know how that is.
38:38So now your, your tour is still on.
38:40It's finished.
38:40You're finishing up your tour in actually my hometown of Las Vegas next week.
38:44Yeah.
38:45Which is, which is a fun play.
38:46Are you, do you love Las Vegas?
38:48Are you a Las Vegas guy?
38:49I love Las Vegas.
38:49Yeah.
38:49I got a house there.
38:50I love it.
38:51You know.
38:51Oh, you do.
38:52You have a house there.
38:53Yeah.
38:53Yeah.
38:53I think whatever savings I get for buying a house in Vegas, I gamble it away anyways.
38:59Oh, do you?
39:00So it's a fair trade.
39:01Yeah.
39:01What do you play?
39:02I play blackjack.
39:03Uh-huh.
39:04You know, Asian people, we love gambling.
39:06You can't, you can't say that, but I can.
39:09No, but it is very, it's true.
39:11There are a lot of Asian tourists come to Las Vegas to gamble.
39:14I'm a disciplined gambler.
39:15Uh, when I play blackjack, if I see another Asian across from me, I just walk away.
39:20I don't know.
39:21I don't know.
39:22Oh, did you, oh.
39:22You guys also know this rule, you just can't say it, you know.
39:25The dealer.
39:26They're too good.
39:27They're always taking money, you know.
39:29And I feel like Asian dealers show no emotion for when you lose.
39:33Other dealers, they always pretend.
39:35They're like, oh my God, I got 21.
39:36So sorry, man.
39:37Better luck next time.
39:38You lose to an Asian dealer, they don't care about your feelings at all.
39:42They're just like, yeah, you lose.
39:45What?
39:4619, 20, can you do math?
39:48Like, do you have more money?
39:50Do you take your mom and dad to Vegas with you?
39:53Yeah, yeah, yeah.
39:53They love it.
39:54They love Vegas.
39:55They stay with you in Vegas?
39:57Yeah, they do.
39:57This is kind of like a family vacation home.
39:59Oh, right.
40:00Is that good?
40:01It seems like maybe not a great place to have the family.
40:04It's okay.
40:05They don't gamble much, you know.
40:07Oh, they don't?
40:07Yeah, they stay in.
40:08They eat the Chinese food in Chinatown.
40:09Great Chinese food in Vegas, by the way.
40:11So I grew up in Chinatown in Las Vegas.
40:13Really?
40:14Yes, that's right.
40:14That is my neighborhood.
40:16That's why we get along so well.
40:17That must be.
40:18I knew there was something, Jimmy.
40:21That's where the first name came from, yeah.
40:23Well, it's great to see you.
40:24Congratulations.
40:25And to have this be not only in a theater,
40:28but to have it in an IMAX theater is just an unbelievable thing for a comedian.
40:32I know.
40:33I can't believe it would have premiered last week in Hong Kong in IMAX.
40:36And I was a little nervous, you know, like, how is this going to look on IMAX?
40:39Right.
40:39And it looks really cool.
40:40It's shot by the people in Hong Kong.
40:41I took the entire heart.
40:42At first, I was going to shoot this special, this material in Seattle, you know, for a streamer
40:47here.
40:48And then these shows in Hong Kong were just so special.
40:50I could recreate these jokes anywhere.
40:52But all the characters like my parents, my heroes in Hong Kong, my childhood friends,
40:56and all the emotions that kind of happened naturally, I just couldn't recreate that.
41:01So I had to do it in Hong Kong.
41:03I took the hard drive back here, you know, and edited for like six months in my karaoke
41:07room basement.
41:08Like, I forced my producer and editor to edit it.
41:10I had to look at my dad's every reaction for like an hour to finally find one that's
41:16an approval, you know.
41:19Well, that's how it goes.
41:21Yeah.
41:21Jimmy O. Yang, everybody.
41:23Jimmy O. Yang finally at home.
41:25Open to the Steelers Friday.
41:33I would like to thank Elizabeth Banks.
41:36Thanks to Jimmy O. Yang.
41:38Thanks to Palm Beach Pete, who is not Jeffrey Epstein.
41:41Apologies to Matt Damon, who is Jeffrey Epstein.
41:44Nightline is next.
41:45Join us tomorrow with Niall Horne and Aaron Moriarty.
41:47Thanks for watching.
41:48Good night.
41:57Good night.
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