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00:00Suppose I'm addicted to porn or addicted to sugar or I want to have this sugar or I have to
00:05watch porn five minutes a day.
00:07So every day I feel these animalistic instincts and every day I'm stuck in a kind of...
00:12As you spoke to me, did you experience lust?
00:15No.
00:19I just wanted to know how much is okay or is anything okay or...
00:22I would never say stop masturbating because that's the only thing that he anyway has.
00:27He'll be like, huh, hee bhi nahin.
00:30People in their 40s, 50s, 60s still do the same things that they did as teenagers and in their 20s.
00:37Why are uncles behaving like kids?
00:40The way they move, the way they wear.
00:42And they want to, you know, look as if they're 18.
00:46They behave like 18.
00:48Immaturity.
00:49Immaturity as an epidemic.
00:51I'm 45 but I must look 25.
00:53All right.
01:00Namaste, sir.
01:03There are our animalistic instincts that crave, that craving that we have every day.
01:08That we have to do something without that we will not be able to do it.
01:11Be it porn, be it sugar or be it whatever.
01:15So, is the right way to live, is to let it be in its center, whatever I am feeling, just
01:24letting it be and not act on it?
01:26See, there is a certain pleasure in living by those instincts, right?
01:33And you need pleasure, so those instincts have a reason to exist.
01:38They don't exist purposelessly, they give you pleasure and you can overcome that pleasure
01:48only with a higher pleasure or a higher purpose.
01:53When you have a higher purpose, then all these lower pleasures get aligned to that.
02:01But we'll never be free of our animalistic instincts.
02:03They'll never be free, but they'll be subsumed, subsumed.
02:09What is subsumed?
02:10Consumed by their higher purpose?
02:11Not consumed.
02:12They will become aligned, they will accept the suzerainty of the higher one.
02:20So suppose I am…
02:21I took great pleasure in being on the stage, it was very important for me and I was playing
02:29a particular character in Inesco's play, Rhinoceros.
02:35There was nobody available to play that part, so I took it up, I was directing it as well.
02:41I had one and a half months.
02:44I purposefully lost a lot of weight just to look the part.
02:49I would have never otherwise lost that kind of weight.
02:54Because there is a pleasure in sugar or in other things, in pizza, in this, in that.
03:00There is certain pleasure there.
03:01Why should I give up on that pleasure?
03:03There has to be something higher in life.
03:06And that's what the typical kind of logdharmic renunciation fails to understand.
03:15You cannot just order people to give up this or that.
03:20First of all, they have to acknowledge a higher challenge which brings with it a higher pleasure,
03:28a higher purpose.
03:30And then all these little things, they fall in place.
03:33They either disappear or get aligned.
03:37You don't even have the time to think about them.
03:39And you gave a number that 50, after 50, I'll be playing a pro game or a higher game.
03:45What if I want to do that when I'm 30?
03:48That's fine.
03:48That's fine.
03:5050 is the very uttermost liberal extreme.
03:53You might die tomorrow.
03:54Yeah, obviously, obviously.
03:55You don't want to make it too tough for the audience.
03:57That's fine.
03:58Made it 50.
03:59You can make it 12.
04:01So, every day I feel these animalistic instincts and every day…
04:05See, they will be there.
04:06The thing is to make them follow something higher.
04:12Make them follow something higher.
04:15Let's say you crave for recognition from others.
04:19Let's say.
04:20Fine.
04:21Fine.
04:21The ultimate thing is freedom from that craving.
04:24Correct.
04:25Right.
04:25Before you reach there, at least say, yes, I want recognition from others, but not for
04:32nonsense.
04:33Let me do something worthwhile to get that recognition from others.
04:39I still crave for recognition, but for something worthy.
04:46I can stand here and tell you some kind of bullshit joke, some kind of stand-up nonsense,
04:54and you would still applaud me.
04:56That's quite possible.
04:57And let's say I still have that desire burning to hear that applause.
05:03And I say, yes, that applause is important, but I'll earn that applause by sharing something
05:09worthy with the audience.
05:11Now that instinct is still there, not yet dead, but aligned with a higher point of consciousness.
05:21How will I transcend this, for example, lust into, suppose I'm addicted to porn or addicted
05:27to sugar, or I want to have this sugar, or I have to watch porn five minutes a day.
05:32And my ego says that watching porn five minutes a day is better than raping someone else.
05:38Because those, yes, I understand, there would be always some kind of justification.
05:41But those who have been through the college life, been through the hostel life, in our get-together,
05:47again, we are discussing many things including this one, we all know very well that when there
05:53is something extremely important, it consumes not only just your day, your energy, but also
06:01your lust.
06:04Right?
06:06You'll forget all of that.
06:08Yes.
06:08Because your day is gone, your energy is gone, you're tired, sir, you will fall asleep.
06:14So the way to live is best-afford basis until you die.
06:17Obviously, obviously, spend that time doing what really matters to you.
06:25Okay.
06:26Right?
06:26Lust and all, these are physical things, fine.
06:30The problem is, do you have somebody worthy in your life to share your lust with?
06:37Are you just gawking at a screen?
06:41Isn't there some indignity in that?
06:45Right?
06:46I mean, to get a worthy partner, first of all, you have to have some semblance of worth in
06:53your own life.
06:55Now, get that kind of a partner and have sex.
06:58Fine.
06:59I mean, but then that is also dependent on that person, that person might not…
07:04You are not dependent on that person.
07:06You brought that person into your life because you and that person both value independence.
07:13It's a bond of independence.
07:16I love you because you are free.
07:18That's what the relationship says.
07:23Okay, sorry for too many questions, but I was stuck in a kind of…
07:29As you spoke to me, did you experience lust?
07:31No.
07:35Not towards me or something, but in general.
07:38No, but there is a time of the day where you experience lust towards sugar or…
07:43Right.
07:43Let's say we continue this, we extend this to 2 AM.
07:47Would you still experience lust?
07:50It's that time of the day.
07:53What if I look at some…
07:56Yeah, you can do that, but when you are immersed in this conversation, this exchange, even at
08:022 AM, would there be lust?
08:04No.
08:04That's what I am saying.
08:08Lust knows when to bow its head down.
08:13Just give lust something or somebody worthy enough to bow down to.
08:20Even lust will bow down.
08:23Lust will not raise its head.
08:25Okay, so lust itself is not bad, but what it is bowing down to is…
08:29Obviously, otherwise, you see, if your life is meaningless, contentless, purposeless,
08:34then lust does have a place.
08:35Otherwise, you will die of boredom.
08:37So, you do something for the purpose of excitement and some random pleasure,
08:42you scratch your own body and you get some kind of pleasure.
08:46And that much pleasure is needed.
08:48Otherwise, you will die.
08:50But why have you brought yourself to that condition where the only pleasure available to you is
08:55scratching of the body?
08:58That's a pitiable position, is it not?
09:00The entire day, my entire life gives me no higher joy.
09:05So, at the end of the day at 2 AM, I start massaging my organs and that's the only thing
09:11I get in my life.
09:12Now, what kind of life is this?
09:15And to this person, I would never say, stop masturbating.
09:19Because that's the only thing that he anyway has.
09:23He'll be like, huh, this is not.
09:30But what if I, so, I'm sorry, but the thing is, the craving, be it sugar or porn or whatever,
09:36what if that five minutes of my life will enable me to do other things which I actually need to
09:41do
09:42during the day?
09:42If, if those five minutes you honestly say are enabling you to do other higher things,
09:51then you have come to violate an ancient theory.
09:57The theory says the means and the ends go together.
10:02The means and the ends are inseparable.
10:04So, I'm not actually doing anything.
10:06Obviously.
10:07How can watching porn enable you to do something great in life?
10:12What kind of greatness is that?
10:13No, just to get rid of that craving.
10:16I fully appreciate where you are coming from because I come from a hostel.
10:20I was young once.
10:22I know what you are saying.
10:23But it doesn't go beyond a point.
10:28It doesn't go beyond a point.
10:31Yes, you have to complete a meaningless assignment.
10:36And so, you close the screen for a while and you jerk off and you return to it.
10:42And you say, now I feel refreshed and now I can subject myself to two more hours of brutality.
10:46It works there.
10:49It works in that kind of condition.
10:52But why must you, first of all, subject yourself to that condition?
10:58Why?
11:02A warrior immersed in a meaningful battle, a battle that means the life to him.
11:11Will he tell his opponent, you please, you know, let's just take five minutes each, a jerk break.
11:18Does that happen?
11:20Do you think that is happening between warriors?
11:22Really?
11:24Forget warriors.
11:25Think of a Grand Slam final lasting five hours.
11:31Two mighty opponents.
11:32You have Federer, you have Nadal.
11:35Five hours and they both are young, brimming with testosterone.
11:38You think in the break they are just...
11:42Is that happening?
11:44Is that happening?
11:45Why is that not happening?
11:47Because their energies are channelized elsewhere.
11:52That's what life is for.
11:55To play a ruthless match.
11:58Not to just keep scratching your own surface.
12:04The problem does not lie in porn or masturbation so much.
12:09Those are trivial things in life.
12:13I am not coming from the Logdharmic standpoint where you are declared sinner or evil or threatened with hell because
12:21you are not a brahmachari.
12:23I am not coming from there.
12:24I am coming from another place.
12:27I am talking of the pity that an internal vacuum is.
12:34Why don't we have something higher in life?
12:39You see, this is a particular setting and we could have discussed anything.
12:44But please see that this is the most important concern that we have.
12:50That's what I am saying is pitiable.
12:53Nothing else to discuss.
12:56I mean, what is it?
12:57It's like urinating.
12:58It's like there is not such a major difference.
13:04But that little thing starts meaning so much to us because we don't have any great thing in life.
13:12Then all these little things start meaning so much, so much, so much, so much, so much.
13:17Otherwise, fine.
13:18I mean, you want to watch porn?
13:20Watch porn.
13:21If you can watch porn in the middle of a meaningful life, if you can do that, do that.
13:28Fine.
13:30No, even, I mean, I sing and I go to music classes and I am an artist as well.
13:35But the thing is, I just wanted to know, how much is okay or is anything okay or what should
13:43be the…
13:43That a doctor will better deliver me.
13:46I don't know.
13:49And he is getting impatient.
13:51We need to, fine.
13:54Acharya Ji, I've noticed in myself and I noticed this in others as well,
14:01that it's very hard to have difficult conversations, to have mature conversations.
14:07I always want comfort.
14:09I always want validation.
14:12And I notice this especially in the US.
14:15People have this fake, have a good day.
14:19They don't want to go deep into things.
14:21It's very superficial.
14:24People in their 40s, 50s, 60s, still do the same things that they did as teenagers and in their 20s.
14:32One example that struck me was the former president of Harvard University.
14:37His emails got released and he's talking, he was in his 50s and he's talking to another middle-aged man
14:45saying,
14:45will you be my wingman and will you help me get this girl?
14:48And the whole culture seems to be revolving around not going deep and just being in this perpetual infant mode.
14:56That's the right word, that's the right word, infantilization.
15:01Immaturity, the cult of immaturity.
15:04Let's all remain immature because maturity brings responsibility.
15:11Have you seen people don't grow up?
15:14Have you seen that?
15:18In fact, I noticed the transition quite early.
15:25Last 10th, I did from Lucknow and then I moved to NCR.
15:30And even between these two places that are hardly 500 kilometers apart.
15:37One of the remarks I made was, why are uncles behaving like kids here?
15:46Why are uncles behaving like kids?
15:50The way they move, the way they wear and they want to, you know, look as if they are 18.
16:00And if they can't look like a teen, they make sure they behave like a teen.
16:07And that's not youthfulness.
16:10That's sheer immaturity.
16:17That helps because to be mature
16:22is to realize the futility of what you have been doing so far.
16:30To be mature is to move into another higher orbit.
16:36But moving into the higher orbit means having the courage to let go of what you had in your present
16:43orbit.
16:47When there is so much more that you have in your present orbit, it becomes difficult to leave it.
16:56That's what industrialization and then this E-Age has done.
17:01An abundance of objects to be had, a great proliferation.
17:07You say, you know, there are all these things to do.
17:10I had my bucket list. I wanted to visit 18 countries.
17:14And I had told myself, 18 before 35.
17:19Before I turned 35, I would be visiting these 18 countries.
17:24Now, you know at the back of your mind, having visited eight of those countries,
17:30that the remaining 10 are replicas, more or less mirror images.
17:35In fact, if you were not to be told the name of the geography, you might be unable to even
17:42differentiate whether you are in this country or that country.
17:46It's quite possible.
17:49Still, you stick to the old resolve.
17:52Now you are 55 and you say, I still have this, this, this to do.
17:57Sir, there is much more to do.
18:01There is a higher responsibility now in a higher orbit.
18:07But the lure of the objects tends to keep you an infant.
18:18I don't know how many of you would resonate with this one.
18:23You remember this...
18:28What was that name of the very popular brand of milk powder starting with F?
18:35Ferex.
18:37And then later on Cerelek, right?
18:40So, what used to happen was, when the younger sibling would be born,
18:47it would be discovered that the elder one, now six or eight,
18:53is eating away all the Ferex.
18:56Whereas, he should have outgrown it.
18:59Why is he still consuming the part of the younger one who really needs it?
19:06Because growing up would mean giving up on the lure, the taste.
19:11He has become addicted to what was available to him as an infant, as a kid.
19:19And that is what is happening to the entire humanity now.
19:26If I grow up, I will have to give up Ferex.
19:31But I am addicted to Ferex, so I won't grow up.
19:34I won't grow up.
19:40The fact is, growing up has its own higher joys.
19:47But wherever there is a higher joy, there is also a higher challenge.
19:52Who wants to take up challenges?
19:57You would rather enjoy Ferex.
20:13Not many people notice it, but this is,
20:16this should be declared by United Nations as an epidemic of this century.
20:25Immaturity, immaturity, immaturity as an epidemic.
20:33Daughters telling their mom, mama grow up.
20:39And they are right.
20:43The mother is younger than the daughter.
20:46The daughter has all the right to scold her.
20:51The daughter has all the right to scold her.
21:08Met my batch mates.
21:09They advised me to get this hairline repaired.
21:17Sanjeev here is smiling.
21:19He knows what I am saying.
21:24I was astounded, but it was interesting.
21:26Why?
21:28Why should I look 25 when I am not?
21:33Why should I look 25 when I am not?
21:36Yes, I would want to stay fit, but that's another thing.
21:40This is not a part of fitness.
21:42Why is it?
21:50And Botox and silicone and...
21:55I see smiles here.
21:58Familiar territory, huh?
22:04All kinds of ammunition to deceive the mirror.
22:13I am 45, but I must look 25.
22:22I must arrest ageing.
22:24I must live another 15 years.
22:27What will you do with those 15 years?
22:3115 more years of stupidity.
22:36What's the point?
22:41Better let it exhaust faster.
22:49Some of the bestsellers in bookstores these days deal with exactly this thing.
22:56How to remain younger.
22:59How to live longer.
23:02What are they doing in Japan?
23:06How do they have so many centurions there?
23:11What will you do with your hundred years?
23:13Please tell me.
23:16Anything even...
23:18Even remotely noble, constructive,
23:24sublime, anything?
23:27No.
23:27You want to live longer and younger so that you can feast on more objects.
23:36Give me more time so that I can consume more.
23:43And that's what those files you are referring to point at.
23:48What if I can have sex at 75?
23:51Why should I not have that?
23:55No problem with having sex at 75.
23:59But is that what you live for?
24:03And science is making it possible.
24:05And it's increasingly happening.
24:10People are remaining sexually active for far longer.
24:16So.
24:18So.
24:24Father is stealing their sons' girlfriends.
24:30That's actually happening.
24:35So many cases in the courts.
24:38The son is suing the father.
24:45Mothers are actually jealous of their daughters.
24:47They don't want to carry them to the parties.
24:51In fact, they introduce themselves as their daughters' sisters.
24:58No, she's not my daughter.
25:01Yeah, just my kid sister.
25:03Kid sis?
25:04What is that?
25:05Kid or sis?
25:15Where does all that come from?
25:20An increasingly strong belief that one can be liberated from suffering without any inner illumination or maturity.
25:34Freedom from suffering is something you will compulsively always want.
25:39Always, always, always.
25:41Nobody can enjoy suffering.
25:42You will always say, I want happiness.
25:47Initially, pleasure, then happiness.
25:50Joy.
25:51I want that.
25:52Nobody likes to suffer.
25:54But what this age is making available to you is the promise of freedom from suffering without growing up.
26:04You can have happiness without growing up.
26:09That's the promise of the markets.
26:11And if I can have happiness without paying the price of maturity, I take the deal.
26:17I take the deal.
26:22This might be the final epidemic.
26:25The crisis of maturity.
26:30You can have a president, an 80-year-old.
26:42Play a dude, enact a playboy.
26:46And in a very cavalier way, you know, just press the nuclear button and pose with it.
26:52Yeah.
27:01So, before being incinerated, you'll have one great social post.
27:11The dude is posing as if he is 25.
27:20Before destroying the planet, he is serenading it.
27:25Bye-bye Earth.
27:27See you.
27:31Being 80 now does not mean that you are deeper.
27:36It means you are more desperate.
27:41Ask girls, they'll tell you.
27:43They'll tell you in public transport, they avoid uncles more than youngsters.
27:55Age is bringing desperation rather than depth.
28:04Uncles are far more eager to look fresh and available.
28:19And the society rewards that.
28:22That's considered cool.
28:29I'm not advocating the other extreme.
28:32I'm not saying that you should allow your body, your looks,
28:38to fall to pieces as you grow up.
28:41No, I'm not saying that.
28:46Maintain a good body.
28:47Maintain a healthy body.
28:48Stay strong.
28:49But stay clear of inner desperation.
28:53That's the right purpose of experience.
28:59Experience should liberate you from the compulsion to have repetitive experience.
29:07You've already experienced enough.
29:08Why do you want to repeat that?
29:10That's what age should bring with it.
29:13Yeah, I'm 50.
29:15Been there, done that.
29:16Liberated.
29:19Yes, son, you carry on.
29:21Your day, your time.
29:25I've had enough of it.
29:27And I have higher peaks to mount.
29:30That doesn't mean I'm retired.
29:34I have bigger challenges to take up.
29:40Higher orbits to fly to.
29:43You continue with what you are doing.
29:45Yeah, yeah.
29:45Those things are pretty.
29:47You want to pursue, go there.
29:48Fine.
29:50Not for me anymore.
29:55No.
29:57I'm not retired.
29:59I'm advanced.
30:09I'm not out of the league.
30:11Now I'm in the pro league.
30:18Yeah, I'm not out of the game.
30:24Playing a higher game.
30:40I won't find too much of that in the U.S.
30:43I'm sorry, but I can't say you would find enough of it in India also.
30:50Probably the entire world is trying to ape the U.S. in this regard.
30:57In fact, if you look at that popular image of Uncle Sam, does he look mature?
31:03That one with the tall hat?
31:06He's aged, right?
31:08He's not exactly a youngster.
31:09But does he look mature by any measure?
31:12No.
31:12That's what the U.S. is.
31:17Aged, but still unsatiated.
31:30Filled to the brim, but still hungry.
31:43Already the maximum contributor to the carbon count in the atmosphere.
31:51But still desperate to emit more.
31:58I won't grow up.
31:59I won't say, I've had my share.
32:02I've done my quota.
32:04I won't emit anymore.
32:06Not only have I been historically the biggest carbon emitter.
32:11I'm still hell-bent on emitting even more.
32:14They boycotted the COP30.
32:17They're out of the Paris Agreement.
32:22The epidemic of immaturity.
32:28If the oldies are trying so hard to play it young,
32:42let the youngsters take it on themselves to act mature.
32:57Would be fair, right?
33:02If daddy wants to act as if he is 15,
33:07at least let the son or the daughter grow up
33:11and act as if they are 30.
33:16The planet needs that.
33:21Somebody has to grow up.
33:40Yes.
33:42Hello.
33:43So, Acharya Prasanji, I would like you to go more deeper into maturity.
33:48Because when I was thinking about it, what maturity is, it's a very relative term.
33:54For you, someone else can be, for me, the term will be different.
34:00Maturity is a very simple thing.
34:04No dispute in that.
34:06Maturity means independence.
34:08Why do you call the kid immature?
34:11Because it can't live without the mother's body.
34:14And when it is even more immature, it lives inside the mother's body.
34:20The more dependent you are on any material thing or person or idea,
34:27the more immature you are, the more immature you are.
34:29That's the definition of immaturity.
34:40He is not happy at being exposed.
34:50This is the protest of immaturity.
34:58Do you understand this?
35:00The more dependent you are, the more immature you are.
35:03That's the simple definition.
35:04It's not subjective.
35:05Not relative.
35:06No.
35:09I said, right?
35:11The definition is implicit in what I already said.
35:14That the purpose of experience is to liberate you from the compulsive need for repetitive experience.
35:22I'm not dependent on that object anymore.
35:27Because all experiences are with respect to objects, right?
35:31Been there, done that.
35:32I'm free of it.
35:33That's what maturity is.
35:35I'm dependent on an ideology.
35:36That's immature.
35:40In India, you are 25.
35:41You are still sticking to your mother.
35:43That's immature.
35:45I'm dependent on beliefs.
35:47That's immature.
35:48I'm dependent on a crowd, an entire society.
35:51That's immature.
35:54Dependence of any kind is immaturity.
36:00See in the pale leaf.
36:04That's the epitome of maturity.
36:07Been there, done that.
36:08Now I'm not dependent even on the tree.
36:14Maturity does not mean death.
36:16Just giving you an example.
36:19An extreme example.
36:24And the very symbol of immaturity is the kid.
36:29Can't walk, can't eat.
36:32And when in the womb, can't even breathe.
36:34So dependent in every way.
36:37So you call the kid immature.
36:39The kid is physically dependent.
36:42So physically immature.
36:44Most of us remain mentally and emotionally dependent.
36:48So we remain mentally and emotionally immature.
36:52And that's what I said is the crisis of this age.
36:55Physically, we might not be dependent when we turn, let's say 40.
36:59So that fellow is not physically dependent.
37:01Though he is still physically dependent if he needs someone compulsively to have sex.
37:07Or even ogle.
37:09Even that is dependence, right?
37:11I need this person because without that body, I can't even go to sleep.
37:15A lot of people say that.
37:17Unless I have a human, warm human body lying next to me, I can't properly sleep.
37:21That's immaturity.
37:23That's immaturity.
37:25But probably that is overcome when you grow up in age.
37:29What's not overcome usually is the mental and emotional aspect of it.
37:35You say, unless I hear from that person, I don't feel at peace.
37:40That's immaturity.
37:43Do you get this?
37:45Unless my beliefs are validated, I feel offended.
37:50That's immaturity.
37:56So what I can relate is that marriage is a direct consequence of immaturity.
38:01Because you are getting a partner to validate.
38:03I never wanted to say that, but you guys are growing up.
38:08So I'm glad.
38:13Okay.
38:14I'll think about it.
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