00:00Holy guacamole, I seriously can't believe this hack exists.
00:04Because clearly carrying around two giant industrial hex nuts in your back pocket
00:08is way more convenient than just learning to tie a single actual knot.
00:12Just slide it in, loop it back, and pull.
00:16Wow, physics works. Who knew?
00:27Holy smokes, I can't believe this actually works without blowing my eyebrows off.
00:31Let's try it.
00:32First, grab some sugar and this totally non-suspicious white powder.
00:37Mix it up like you're making the world's worst cake batter.
00:41Now cook it on low heat.
00:43Once it looks like forbidden taffy, pour it out.
00:46Mold it into a cute little donut of doom.
00:49Careful, it's hot.
00:51Finally, light it up and enjoy disappearing into a cloud of I have too much free time.
00:56Holy smokes, I can't believe it.
01:00So apparently we need an axe that looks like a transformer and a spare tire from a 98 Honda Civic.
01:07Look at that latch mechanism.
01:08Very dramatic.
01:10Here we go.
01:11The tire is literally just there so you don't have to do the cardio of picking up the pieces.
01:15Okay.
01:17Holy moly, I can't believe how satisfying that looks.
01:21Okay, melt it down.
01:24Now for the roll.
01:26Ah, yes.
01:27Nothing stimulates the appetite quite like wrapping fresh fruit in sticky spider webs.
01:32Look at that texture.
01:33Absolutely terrifying.
01:35Time for a bite.
01:36Mmm.
01:37Tastes like instant regret and beard glue.
01:39Nailed it.
01:40Holy moly, I can't believe it actually works.
01:43Who needs a lighter when you can just risk scratching your brand new iPhone?
01:47It lights on hardware, my dusty shoes, and even on this very shiny, very specific metal object I found in
01:56the drawer.
01:56Don't ask.
01:58Holy moly.
01:59Maybe, finally, a way to stop picking up satellite radio signals with my head.
02:04Just a little stick, a quick press, and boom.
02:08Look at that aerodynamics.
02:09I feel like I could run at least 10 miles per hour faster now.
02:13Who needs surgery when you have glorified double-sided tape, right?
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