- 13 hours ago
Going Dutch S02E07 (2026) [Full Movie] [Vertical Drama]Full EP - Full
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00:05Congratulations, Major Shaw, on 20 years of distinguished service in the United States
00:10Army.
00:11I insisted on being here today in front of your friends and family to bestow this honor
00:15upon you and take it away from Colonel Quinn.
00:18Well done, Major Shaw.
00:20Thank you, sir.
00:22Thank you so much.
00:25Happy 20 years.
00:26Happy 20 years.
00:2820 years.
00:29I can't believe it.
00:30In my two decades, the American military has won and abandoned so much of the Middle East.
00:35But what's made it worthwhile are the friends and family I've made along the way, like all
00:38of you.
00:39Now, I know how much you like the movie up.
00:41I do.
00:42I got 80 more of these in the van.
00:43You want to see if I can get lift off in a high ceiling room or what?
00:46I was hoping you'd say that.
00:47I know how much you love nasty grandma candy.
00:51Oh, hard candy wreath?
00:52Yeah.
00:52My favorite, including all the best flavors, brown, light brown, and beige.
00:57Yes.
00:57Yeah, this is too much.
00:58No, it's not.
00:5920 years is deserving of an honorable gift.
01:03The singing cactus I sent you so many TikToks about?
01:05Is it the one that's inappropriately somber?
01:10Oh, it is the one.
01:13Oh, this is just what I wanted.
01:15I didn't know this was a thing.
01:17So you're traditionally not into things.
01:20Oh, you know, it's not a thing.
01:22It's not a thing.
01:22No, it's a big thing.
01:2420 is not just a big thing.
01:25It's the biggest thing.
01:26Yeah.
01:26It means you get your pension and your lifetime health care.
01:29And more important than anything else, really, the respect and acknowledgement of MUA.
01:35A challenge coin?
01:36Yeah.
01:38Six different colors.
01:40You guys, thank you for all the gifts.
01:42I love you, man.
01:42Yeah, we can't brush you.
01:43Oh, also, I forgot.
01:45I got you this.
01:46It's a matcha, and I just tried a little bit of it to make sure it's not too cold.
01:50I held it until the ice melted.
01:54You got him a drink that you already drank.
02:00This is going to hit a spot.
02:01I think so.
02:02Aw.
02:02Yeah.
02:03Do I have to drink it?
02:25Oh, are you packing for your camping trip?
02:28Celebrating Major Shaw's 20 years?
02:30It's a rite of passage.
02:31Yeah?
02:31I think it's great that the two of you get to spend some time together.
02:34One last hurrah.
02:36What are you talking about?
02:37Now that he's hit 20, he's considering retirement and has met with the transition officer at Baumholder.
02:42I don't believe you.
02:43I think you're lying.
02:44You know, this is privileged information that you cannot act on, which makes it more fun for me.
02:50Yeah, yeah.
02:51Hey!
02:51Hey!
02:51General Davidson, didn't realize you were still here.
02:53Major Shaw didn't realize that you were still here.
02:55Hey, you know what?
02:55I was just checking the weather about our trip tonight, and it looks crazy.
02:59There's a cold front coming in.
03:00It's going to rain, and now they're saying snow.
03:02So I think maybe we should move it.
03:03Like six months to the summertime, you'll be here, right?
03:05I already got permission from Celeste for tonight.
03:07Not that I need a permission, because I am my own man.
03:09I do what I want to do.
03:10Sure.
03:10You know, but I'll check the calendar.
03:11All right.
03:11Great.
03:12Summer.
03:12Six months from now.
03:13Well, what about 12 months?
03:14Well, the app doesn't go that far.
03:15I have a feeling that the weather will be even better in 12 months.
03:19It's a feeling.
03:19That's not the app.
03:20What weather app are we looking at?
03:21Just answer the question.
03:23The, okay.
03:24Uh, well, the weather looks pretty great right now, so why don't we give tonight a shot and
03:28just see how it goes, maybe?
03:29Smart.
03:30Keep your options open.
03:31Okay, so then I'll see you tonight, Colonel, or in 12 months, maybe 18 months, because I
03:35don't know what's happening here.
03:36Okay.
03:38I hope I haven't ruined your trip.
03:40Oh, you haven't ruined my trip.
03:41It's the camping trip where I convince Shaw to become a lifer.
03:45The only thing that's going to convince Shaw of is that he should have retired five years
03:49ago.
03:52You need a hobby, sir.
03:54This is my hobby.
03:59I know you loved seeing Celeste completely blow it in front of her husband, who you're
04:03secretly in love with.
04:04No, I did not.
04:04I really would like one side of the love triangle to be happy, right?
04:08What?
04:09That's a...
04:10Oh!
04:11Can you switch over?
04:12Oh, um...
04:13Oh, yeah, come in.
04:15Okay.
04:15Can I ask you guys something?
04:17Of course.
04:18Okay.
04:18Do you think that Abe was upset that he didn't do more for his 20th?
04:22No.
04:23No, in fact, I think he might be upset at the idea of him being upset.
04:27More than he shouldn't be upset.
04:29I feel like that totally summarizes our whole relationship.
04:31We're constantly misinterpreting each other.
04:32All think he's, like, mad, but really he's just hungry.
04:35And then all think he's hungry when really he just wants to make a baby.
04:38Yeah, straight couples are crazy.
04:40I really want to make it up to him.
04:42I know he really loved those presents, especially that little cactus.
04:45They say that?
04:45I can tell.
04:46Can you?
04:47Or maybe he's hungry.
04:49I was hoping I could run some ideas past you guys.
04:51Yeah, we're actually so awkward.
04:53We're so busy.
04:53Give us a list.
04:54How about a hot stone massage?
04:56Oh.
04:56I'll take some rocks from our yard, preheat the oven.
04:59Okay, hold on.
04:59Hold on.
04:59Outside rocks?
05:00Mm-hmm.
05:01Yeah, those are jagged.
05:02Like, you need special stones.
05:03Special training.
05:05Yeah, that too.
05:06What if I made us dinner?
05:07Lovely.
05:08Well, that's better than rubbing on them with rocks.
05:10Yeah.
05:10Dinner in bed.
05:12Mm-hmm.
05:12Bed.
05:12Yeah, and I'll make his favorite spaghetti and meatballs.
05:14That sounds like a wet meal for bed.
05:17Mm-hmm.
05:17Like, too wet.
05:17Yeah, wet bed.
05:18Or, you know, even speaking of dinner, you could plan a dinner with his friends.
05:22That is such a good idea.
05:23I don't know why I was overthinking it.
05:24Yeah, do that.
05:25Yeah, great.
05:26Do that.
05:26Mm-hmm.
05:27Would you guys help me plan it?
05:30Mm-hmm?
05:31Because my marriage is kind of on the line.
05:34Oh, yes.
05:36Of course.
05:37Yes.
05:38Yes.
05:38Yes.
05:38We would love to help you.
05:40Oh.
05:40You're going to save this marriage.
05:42We are going to save this marriage.
05:43Oh, my gosh.
05:44Save your marriage.
05:45Oh, yeah.
05:47Save your marriage.
05:51All right, pal.
05:52Tonight is all about us, the woods, and some knives, and some whiskey, and some axes, and
05:56some guns, and a small cannon.
05:58A cannon?
05:59You won't find that in a civilian job.
06:00No, you won't.
06:01Well, I guess it varies state to state.
06:03Yeah, all I know is that I'm really looking forward to some time in nature to clear my head,
06:06you know what I mean?
06:08Thanks, pal.
06:08What are you doing?
06:09What?
06:09Oh.
06:10Who's driving?
06:11Me.
06:11Yeah, it's one of the perks of the 20-year club.
06:13You don't have to drive anymore.
06:14Hey.
06:14Don't worry.
06:15He's going to stay in the van.
06:15Okay.
06:16Yeah, yeah.
06:16That's fine by me, man.
06:18So, I finally finished Game of Thrones for the second time.
06:22So, I'm going to binge the Bible.
06:23Oh.
06:23Complete unabridged audio book.
06:24Did you know it's the highest selling book of all time?
06:27Mm-hmm.
06:27Did know that.
06:28Yeah.
06:28Sold more copies than Da Vinci Code, which is also about Jesus, so I guess it's an extended
06:31Bible universe.
06:32You mean Christianity.
06:33No spoilers.
06:35Let's go.
06:43What are you doing here?
06:44Well, what you said about keeping Major Shaw in the army got me thinking.
06:48Oh, so you came to help me.
06:49Hell no.
06:49No, no, no.
06:50I just realized how much Shaw means to you, so I'm going to make sure you fail, and at
06:54the end of this desperate attempt, he decides to retire.
06:59Guess what?
06:59What?
07:00You're not invited.
07:00Being top of the chain of command, I get to invite myself wherever I wish to go.
07:05As a matter of fact, I crashed nine weddings this year and didn't bring a single gift.
07:10Oh, and also, I've invited a couple of lifers along that, uh, you know.
07:15Come on, man.
07:17Merkle and Funt, they're going to ruin the whole trip.
07:19Mm-hmm.
07:20Funt never talks, but his body makes so many noises.
07:24Let's go, boys.
07:27General.
07:28Lieutenant Colonel.
07:29General, and Major Karisma.
07:31What a treat.
07:32Slide over.
07:32Oh.
07:33Yeah, yeah, yeah, come on.
07:33Okay, you're coming along, too?
07:35Absolutely, because we're going to have some fun, my friend.
07:43Yep.
07:43You think the army made a man out of you now?
07:45Wait till you become a lifer.
07:46When you reject civilization completely and all its temptations, that's when your body
07:50allows you to get into peak physical condition.
07:53All right.
07:58Oh, that was fun.
07:59Why don't we fight with these anymore?
08:01Because we're lost as a society.
08:12And now, the Bible, written by God, read by Hank Azaria.
08:17In the beginning, God created the heavens and the earth.
08:20Now, the earth was formless and empty.
08:22Darkness was over the surface of the deep, and the Spirit of God was hovering over the waters.
08:28Let there be light!
08:30And there was light.
08:31Damn, it's a hell of a start.
08:35You're right.
08:35This is much better than doing it in bed, but we can still do our favorite spaghetti and
08:38meatballs.
08:39That's so funny.
08:40I've never seen him eat that one time.
08:43Well, it was more my favorite.
08:45And then he started making it for me, and now we just always eat it together.
08:48Cute.
08:48Yeah.
08:49Yeah, we could do that.
08:50We could have Shaw make your spaghetti and meatballs for his celebration dinner, or just
08:57spitballing.
08:58I do know that there is a really authentic Indian place in town that Shaw really loves.
09:02He says it reminds me of his grandmother's cooking.
09:04Oh.
09:04So that's just an option.
09:07Yeah.
09:07Great.
09:08Okay, that's perfect, because I actually already ordered it.
09:10Oh.
09:10And they threw in the utensils for free.
09:12Woo.
09:13You are doing such a good job.
09:14This is just going to be amazing.
09:16You're crushing it.
09:16I'll see you later.
09:17Okay.
09:23Look at you losers sweating your asses off.
09:25And not me.
09:26I got three layers on.
09:28I haven't sweat a drop.
09:29It might be a pituitary issue, sir.
09:31You should probably check that out.
09:31No, it's not.
09:32It's a control issue.
09:33I have power over my body.
09:36Ah, no thanks.
09:37I don't really like to drink that much.
09:38It makes me yell.
09:39Well, if you're not yelling, are you really saying anything?
09:42You know what?
09:42Whatever.
09:43I'm not driving.
09:43There you go.
09:46Wow.
09:47Wow!
09:48Okay, here we go.
09:49Yeah, there it is.
09:50This is what it's all about.
09:51This is the life, baby.
09:52It sure is.
09:53You know what?
09:53Let's make this a little more interesting with a little unfriendly competition that I learned
09:57from a couple of enlisted men.
09:59And never have I ever had my highest rank be colonel or low.
10:05So drink up, you subordinate losers.
10:09Ha, ha, ha!
10:13Refusing to budge, the donkey turned to his owner and began to speak.
10:16Hey, did you not see the angel in the road?
10:20Talking donkeys.
10:22The Bible's like Shrek.
10:24Shrek had a lot of animal sacrifice.
10:27well never have i ever launched a full-scale attack on a flock of geese they were invading
10:34our airspace they were migrating oh my god i think i'm done it's getting a little hot in here
10:40i'm gonna no no what are you talking about this is the brother this is how we have fun right
10:44make each other laugh this is what you have to look forward to when you're a lifer and we know
10:48we can trust you because you're an honorable and trustworthy person you wouldn't abandon us
10:52quit and take some stupid civilian job wait wait wait wait wait is that what this is about
10:58did you guys find out that i met with a transition officer well nothing happens on my base without
11:02my knowing about it yeah so we know you're leaving me us the army i haven't decided anything okay
11:10this is a really tough choice and i just met with a transition officer because celeste wanted me to
11:15she's leaving the army and she wanted me to take my 20 and retire and possibly save
11:20our marriage and i'm saying it's time to get rid of your ball and chain what the colonel of course
11:26i am tired old man what are you starting now your stuff higher and constantly riding me because all
11:30you need to be ready oh really yeah i can't i just can't anymore it's too much it's too much
11:35for me
11:36stop stop you know what i just wanted a night in the woods that's it me some axes good times
11:41my future
11:41might be hanging in the balance but one thing i do know for certain is that i don't want to
11:44end up sad
11:45and alone eating beans in a tent and some sick competition with my sworn enemy because i don't
11:50have any wives left but that's because he's a narcissist oh he's the narcissist you're both
11:53narcissists i told you drinking makes me yell
12:03hey hey how's it going what's up so um yeah i could really use rick silver's number right now
12:10you put his number in my phone for safekeeping and remember what we agreed to that it had to be
12:15world
12:15war three and i would only get it if i wanted one last ride before the world ended and is
12:18it world
12:18war three no but it's close okay i can't stop myself from helping celeste try to save for marriage
12:23to a guy that i have fallen for i offered to write her speech what why would you do that
12:28to
12:28yourself because she couldn't find any word that rhymed with obligation i can't help myself yeah you
12:33can help me and rick silver is not the answer he is a cia liar who destroys your life like
12:38it's a
12:38foreign leftist government i'm sorry i'm not giving you his number kind of yeah do you know anything
12:44that rhymes with obligation frustration actually do you have a pen girl let's let's write her own speech
12:49i'll go get my head a 15 mile hike over uneven ground i've done worse a lot of them not
12:55one of them
12:57i can live my life in the lab where i want oh this is bad
13:09ja i know you're mad but you can't leave me alone with these turds
13:13all right man you're driving me crazy
13:18cha
13:21hey cha
13:24look i told him the truth army life is hard yeah it was just how we like it yes yes
13:29we do but you know
13:29what let me ask you did you ever once think about leaving after 20 years no you neither that's our
13:36answer as much as i would love to wound you he's got to find it on his own what are
13:42you
13:42buddha now do me a favor just focus on the search and try not to declare war on the geese
13:48what's that uh funt he has uh breathing issues got a handful of vertebrae removed and now his neck
13:54is too short what like a pug oh my god help two o'clock hey oh yes uh i sprained
14:05my ankle i can't
14:06really put any pressure on it i can you call for help we don't call for help we are the
14:11help
14:12general you remember how to make a stretcher funt stop breathing and find some branches
14:17three miles down and one to go
14:22hey all right guys let him down here
14:26let me see i got a signal
14:28oh yep i do
14:31come on papadakis let's go let's go and before me was a pale horse and the rider was death what
14:40death was riding the horse dude the bible is everything papadakis you have one job we're gonna
14:50have to carry you the last mile or so here we go one two three you ready yeah don't worry
14:58only the
14:58last half is uphill
15:08he's coming
15:12surprise
15:15you did this all for me
15:16oh 20 years is a big deal do you want a drink
15:19um after uh falling down a hill and crying in a pile of leaves i can confidently say i'm never
15:24gonna drink again so shirley temple here sit down
15:29this is crazy you look a lot better than you did in the van ah yeah appreciate that yeah it
15:36was and
15:37sir i wanted to tell you something what do you have weak ankles i i knew that the first time
15:41i saw you
15:41walking a basketball okay please i've seen oak trees with more lateral movement than you what i was
15:45trying to say is that i don't know if i'm gonna stay in the army but i know that i
15:50was wrong
15:52i would be proud to be one of you yeah listen i was wrong is what davidson would be saying
15:59if he
15:59was here because everything that went wrong on this trip was his fault the thing i did want to say
16:03to you is i think you should take some time to really think about this because it's not just like
16:07vaguely your future this is like the rest of your life so i think you should share it with something
16:11that sees you for who you are and shares your passion and your values whether that's the u.s army
16:16or
16:16something else like my wife yeah he could be a person you know it could be a person you
16:21biting your tongue right now no cheek hmm if i bit down in this heart of my tongue i'd lose
16:26it
16:29hello hi i want to thank everybody for coming out here to celebrate abe
16:38i'm sorry i can't pull myself away dead sea scrolls just dropped and there's like a lot of debate on
16:42message boards whether it's canon or not uh abe there's nobody like you you're obsessed with
16:48broadway shows but you don't want anyone to know like we don't hear you singing suddenly seymour in
16:53the laundry room you only own one bowl and you wash it after every use an impressive system that we
16:59should all follow the thing i love most about you is your unique ability to be there for us without
17:07us
17:08knowing it you support us you make us feel like we're doing it all on our own you're the sky
17:14the
17:15moon the grass you don't demand attention but nothing would be the same without you my life wouldn't be
17:23the same without you so uh let's all raise our glasses to abe
17:31is that okay thank you for that okay back to this yeah
17:37oh biryani yes the alugobi logo all right okay i'll get better all right look celeste i know things
17:47have been a little tricky for us and i know we've been talking a lot about um whether a future
17:51together
17:51makes sense right and um after that toast it just confirmed it i mean you understand me more than
17:58i was sure of before and so now i know that we didn't write the toast or plan this magical
18:05night
18:05maggie did maggie i'm so sorry i know that i messed up and i wanted to make it right but
18:12i didn't
18:12really know where to start and i've just been having such a hard time
18:20yeah yeah
18:23it shouldn't be this much work
18:27no no one can say we didn't try we tried so hard i mean we wore those marriage counselors out
18:32but it feels like we both know it's over
18:37and i've always been bothered by that one bowl system i i think it's normal to have 12 bowls
18:42okay what are you gonna do invite 11 people over for a cereal party i'd like to have the option
18:50seriously maggie
18:51movie the sky the grass the moon oh so that's how you feel about joe
18:58i would have delivered it better
19:05yo dead sea scrolls has goliath at six six
19:09david about to cook this food for real okay
19:12you can go joe
19:16i just want to explain this to a layman so there are talking animals right and a talking bush
19:22and talking people but a lot of books have that right but this
19:26cia agent rick silver oh my god you came oh my god babe i am so glad you facebook messaged
19:33my
19:33mom i haven't been able to stop thinking about you that's okay i stopped listening after babe come
19:38me oh oh so reliably hot i know i am you are too great you were too you were
19:46hey um has anyone seen maggie yes everybody's seen maggie over there with the worst ex-boyfriend to
19:52ever do it he's like glitter from a strip cup impossible
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