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Boyzone No Matter What S01E03 (2025) [Full Movie] [Full Story]Full EP - Full
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00:14You're living in a bubble, you're living in a dream.
00:19I was 18 when we started, catapulted into this superstardom.
00:24Look at us now! Look at us now!
00:27Because I loved what we did for seven years, and now it was being taken from me.
00:32Do boyzones still exist? I don't know.
00:35The world we just lived has disappeared. What is my new world? Who the fuck am I?
00:42Although nothing has been confirmed officially, it's thought Gatelyn...
00:45Everything had changed. Everything had changed.
00:48I should have gone back. I know that I should have gone back.
00:53To get those years would have been everything.
00:57The world is now.
01:17Boyzone is over forever by Paul Martin.
01:21Yeah, fucking hell.
01:24Just reading what he told me, I mean, that is just,
01:27this really sums up how pissed off Shane was with Ronan.
01:33Honestly, all you had to do was talk to me about how you feel about Ronan and off he went.
01:39I was angry at Raul for years and I found myself in this dark world.
01:45It didn't take a lot to upset me and it would come out in any environment,
01:50any space, live TV, to concerts, to interviews.
01:54Do you get upset that they keep saying nasty things about you?
01:57No, you know what, so be it.
02:00We're all getting on with our lives.
02:02Boyzone, I don't think they're going to get back together pretty much.
02:04And if the guys want to get back together, you know, wish them the best.
02:07I hope they do well.
02:08We had decided to take a year off and then get back together.
02:12Very much, renegade it.
02:14But one year later, I couldn't see it happening.
02:17Okay, I'm going to be in box.
02:19A bad lemon.
02:20Oh, a ball's lemon.
02:21Ball.
02:25What did you all take before you came?
02:29I was getting plenty of work, but it just wasn't fulfilling my dreams, I suppose, my goals.
02:37I really wanted to perform.
02:38I had to get out.
02:40I had to find something.
02:40I had to find something that gave me a bit of hope in life.
02:49Growing up, cars are with my life.
02:52My dad working as a car mechanic, me lying under any car, under any bonnet.
02:59It's who I am.
03:02I was blessed with an opportunity to drive in a show called Autosport Show.
03:07The best in the world were there, and this dickhead.
03:14I came toward in that race, and from there, I got signed to Ford Motorsport.
03:20When you stand on stage, that energy that you got, I got that from cars.
03:26In Boyzone, I lacked purpose in my own mind.
03:30All of a sudden now, shit, this is your time to shine.
03:39Here she is, my one and only, Shelly Unwin.
03:42Shelly, this is my mate, Claire McCarthy.
03:43Shelly, good to meet you.
03:45Yeah, as well, in case you do.
03:46Out of the blue, I got a phone call from Coronation Street.
03:51Out of my comfort zone, to say the least, but nevertheless, I gave it my best shot.
03:57I went into Corrie for two or three episodes.
03:59I ended up staying on and off for ten years.
04:01Drink's over.
04:03Coronation Street gave me an identity.
04:05It gave me belief in myself.
04:07It gave me confidence.
04:08All of a sudden, I was somebody.
04:10That was Keith Duffy.
04:12It wasn't the big one in the back with the broken teeth.
04:14Now, did you watch your pal?
04:16Keith, yeah, I did, yeah.
04:18I thought it was fantastic.
04:19And do you all still keep in touch?
04:21I haven't spoke to Ronan in a while, or Mikey.
04:23Just that you're all so busy, you know, doing your own thing.
04:26You know, it's quite hard.
04:28I'd always make time for boys on.
04:31After my solo album, it was very, very difficult.
04:34More difficult than I thought it was going to be.
04:37You know, quit for about a year.
04:39Came back and done some theatre.
04:42I loved doing that, but I just felt it really difficult being on my own and, you know, being with
04:49four guys who you consider your brothers and then just kind of not seeing them for a long time.
04:55None compares to being with the lads.
05:07It was unbelievable in the noughties.
05:09Madness.
05:12My manager, Louis, at the time, is saying, record company are pushing you.
05:15You've got to make the album.
05:17You know, we need the album made.
05:19I was very hungry and I wanted to be great and I wanted to have my opportunities, so I kept
05:23going.
05:25But it was quantity over quality.
05:29I had loads of ideas for him.
05:31As a big middle-of-the-road artist, he appeals to older women and stuff.
05:36And there's nobody better.
05:39That was his market.
05:40That was his lane.
05:41It just, he just got it wrong.
05:43He just made the wrong choices.
05:47He didn't even know where the fuck I was.
05:49I opened in Sydney to 10,000 people.
05:51He didn't know I was on tour.
05:54Get ready for another TV phenomenon.
05:56Pop stars The Rivals is coming in autumn.
05:59It's good, it's good.
06:00We are going to get good singers at the end of the day.
06:02Louis became a TV personality.
06:06He was given that chance because he was the manager of Boyzone.
06:10And that obviously gave Louis an opportunity, but that took a lot of his time.
06:14I was on the phone to Ronan all the time.
06:17I talked to him every day.
06:19And he always wanted more.
06:21Things start to fall into place and you realise.
06:25Louis's not a great manager.
06:27I gave him multiple opportunities to fix the problems.
06:31So I went and met him and I said it to his face.
06:34He just said he didn't want to be a karaoke artist.
06:37And he wanted to record his own songs, he wanted to write his own songs,
06:40and he wanted to be a proper artist.
06:43I've got one shot in my career.
06:45And he didn't give a fuck.
06:47That shocked me.
06:48The fact that he wasn't happy with the songs.
06:51They were all hits.
06:52Hey, that's what you're in the business for.
06:55Having hits.
06:56Just fell on deaf ears.
06:58I always told him the truth.
07:00What was the truth?
07:02You lucky fucker.
07:03You know, this is great.
07:05Enjoy it.
07:06And I remember going in and saying, right, that's it.
07:10And what did you say?
07:11I said, okay.
07:13Nothing I could have done.
07:14I couldn't have changed.
07:15It was a divorce.
07:20Battle lines are drawn, and you did have to pick a side.
07:23I picked Louis.
07:25I knew Westlife were going to be bigger than Boyzone.
07:27It was in my own selfish interest.
07:29But you had to pick somebody, and Louis made that very clear.
07:33It's this monumental shift in the media.
07:37Just the language in the newspapers changed, and he was demeaned and diminished.
07:43I called him talentless and different things here and there in the press.
07:48He knew how to hurt me.
07:50Vicious fucking bitchy, vicious, horrible things.
07:55He tried to ruin me and my career.
08:00Do I regret it?
08:01Yeah, a little bit.
08:03Do you think he knows that you regret it?
08:04No, he doesn't know.
08:07It was an incredible show of the strength of somebody who has the media that they think of it.
08:13You are who you are because I made you who you are.
08:19I was with Ronan all the time, you know.
08:22I was there working with him every day.
08:25So it was just inevitable that I would just take over eventually.
08:31Mark Plunkett, thank God for Mark.
08:33I kept my sanity because of Mark.
08:36We had a great time.
08:38Lots of touring, lots of international trips, lots of TVs all over the world.
08:44You're mad busy because you're promoting your new album.
08:48New single album.
08:49But the single's out now, this is it.
08:50But there's inevitably going to come to a point where the sales dip slightly.
08:54You know, the hits weren't quite as big as they'd been.
09:00I made my third album, my fourth, and things started to slow down a little bit.
09:07But he wasn't having hits.
09:11But he's not having any since I left.
09:14Oh.
09:15I had done my party trick.
09:18And maybe I'd done it a few more times too much.
09:21And I needed to figure out again who I was, you know, where I was.
09:25So my compass kind of went back to North, to the boys.
09:412006, Gary Oro was putting Take That back together.
09:46So I went along to see the show.
09:51All the fans noticed me.
09:53And the whole place started chanting my name and clapping.
09:57And I was like, I thought I had been completely forgotten about.
10:02So that was quite a surprise.
10:09And then when I seen their show, I was kind of feeling the bug again, you know?
10:18We just slowly but surely got to chat again to each other.
10:22And little kind of whispers here and there.
10:24You know, Stephen would definitely be the one that would be pushing it with him.
10:27This is going to be great.
10:28You know, we have to do this.
10:29And just all spiralled into kind of us having a meeting.
10:32Let's get into a room.
10:34That was all.
10:35That's all.
10:35It was test the water.
10:41I was worried about the boys' reaction.
10:44I hadn't seen them for years.
10:47There was resentment.
10:48Bitterness.
10:51I was shitting myself going into the room.
10:53Yeah, 100%.
10:53I was nervous as hell.
11:09You know, you could feel there was a lot of scars.
11:12People were unsure.
11:14Unsure it was going to work.
11:16Unsure they wanted to do it at all.
11:19The rage that I had with Roe.
11:21In my mind, when I saw him, I was going to fucking destroy him.
11:25I was going to abort him.
11:28Very, very, very, very spiky.
11:30That first moment, walking into the room again.
11:34I was fuming.
11:35And when I saw his face, I could do nothing but hug the fella.
11:39Come on, let's go in.
11:40What's your skinhead?
11:41What's happening?
11:42I was going to do it.
11:44Like, I miss you.
11:45That actually gave me a good insight to it's not always as bad as you think in your mind.
11:52I would just like to apologise if anything I have said or done in the past seven years
11:56has hurt or affected anybody in a negative or unhappy fashion.
12:02I wasn't the reason the band broke up, but I was definitely the reason the band didn't
12:05get back together before, and I apologise for that.
12:08I made choices that I'm not proud of.
12:11I left them behind.
12:15For success, I did have blinkers on.
12:21Didn't end right.
12:22We need to do it right.
12:25Aston if he thought there was any scope for the band getting back together.
12:29Things haven't always been as good as they are tonight.
12:32It was great going in so successful as an actor, but every now and again you'd get a
12:37surge of memories, the audience being blown away.
12:43And you'd go, wow, I'd love just one more chance.
12:46Maybe this could work now if we're all really on the same page.
12:50You know, it was there for the taking.
12:53Personally, you know what I mean, I'd like to do a little something.
12:56I really fucking miss to all of you.
12:59I mean, I think it's just amazing being here.
13:00I mean, it's bad.
13:02It excited me, you know.
13:05I think everyone was kind of, let's do it, let's do a tour.
13:09Let's get to see if people are bothered with Boys on anymore.
13:29Who's idea were those fucking outfits?
13:40Oh my God.
13:42Our first performance in eight years.
13:46We're climbing underneath the stage to go on these trapdoors to be sprung loaded onto stage.
13:54So nervous going up in that lift and kind of going, oh my God, I don't know where I'm going.
13:58It's like you're rubbing the headlights.
14:00You get a panic attack, you get this kind of, oh shit.
14:05And it's amazing.
14:11I remember that excitement, how we felt in that exact moment with that countdown.
14:17You can feel the breath, you can feel the energy from the crowd.
14:21And you cannot imagine what that's like.
14:23It's unreal.
14:34I'm like, I'm using goosebumps.
14:48I couldn't hear the first two songs, to be honest, because the crowd was so loud.
14:54I'm not there for glory.
14:56I'm there to go, look at all you people and look at the joy that we can bring you.
15:02Why you take me so long just to find me?
15:05Why you take me so long, what I'm afraid of when I was there all alone?
15:12We designed a moment, everybody would get their own little moment.
15:15And I think that's why it felt so different.
15:19i felt a part of the band for the first time
15:28that my efforts were being appreciated that we could now really be a band
15:37we'd fill each other spaces without even thinking about it without even looking at each other
15:42if shame is out far right you know i'd see him starting to move in if mikey was in the
15:47middle
15:47he'd move over to fill my space and you just fill each other's voids and it's a real art
15:57we're back we were back i just felt you know unbelievable that was pretty magic then
16:06getting the band back together
16:12that reunion tour was was huge you know multiple nights in arenas
16:17then when they got back together they asked me to take over the managing i was glad to be involved
16:22i've been there since since day one in the uk um and yeah i didn't want anyone else to carry
16:28on
16:28writing those those chapters see what a vocal harmony group we are we're not a boy band right
16:34the plan was then to you know working a new album everyone was in a great place
16:41we uh as a collective now had more control over the music for the first time i was enjoying the
16:48music
16:48that boys on was doing it took us 15 years to do that oh seven to 09 were the best
16:56years of the band
16:58we were the most comfortable in our own skin that we'd ever been
17:02as soon as i get in a room of them boys i'm the silliest fella i was back when i
17:05was 17 years old it's
17:07just kindergarten kids it was absolutely brilliant to be back with those fellas like nothing had
17:13changed and nothing had changed just seemed to share even more laughs than we had before
17:24i don't know just a better understanding of each other you gotta get this right come on some people
17:30really came into their own steven in particular it was the best version of him i'd ever seen the other
17:38guys have got girls to dance with you got a bloke yeah i don't have to be true to myself
17:42and that's
17:42that's how it turned out and i think it works beautifully with the song he was looking great
17:47he had a book going he had met someone new andy they were just in love and got married
17:55very happy everything was going as planned presumably you're going to be working on new
18:01music together four singles a brand new song and you have it already yeah well we think so we had
18:05done the better tour we had new songs for a new album and that brother album is is our finest
18:10hour
18:11everybody was really really happy and in a good place it's a blessing be given a second chance
18:17and i'm loving every minute of it
18:31my phone rang it was a solicitor by the name of gerald keen who boys on had used in the
18:3890s
18:40phone rang picked it up and gerald keen says to me i uh
18:49uh i'm sorry i'm sorry to tell you
18:55what stephen has passed away
18:59and i said stephen who
19:02and uh
19:07he said stephen gately
19:10the boy zone singer stephen gately has died while on holiday on the spanish island of mallorca at the age
19:15of 33
19:22i had to call louis and the guys
19:27and give them the news
19:31it was late in the bar we're drinking and as i left the crowd rose voice came louder in my
19:40phone
19:40and he's like steo steo he's gone i said what our stephen he said yeah he said he's gone
19:48it just wouldn't go in
19:49what what no no no not our stephen and i'll hear him screaming
19:56it's very hard you're still a hero
20:03can't breathe your legs got from under you
20:08it would get through in little bits and then it would be complete just breakdown
20:18my wall just fell apart
20:24numb
20:31we tried to put a plan together to get down to see steo
20:36our instinct was just to get together so that force of companionship and that force of like
20:43okay where are you how can i get to you what do you need i couldn't tell you the journey
20:47couldn't
20:48tell you anything i just know we got on a fucking plane
21:00the body of stephen gately was found
21:02so far gately's family have made what happened what caused stephen star's death on saturday remains
21:06unexplained miriam got me on a flight to mallorca the next morning i get out there and it is heaving
21:18there was press everywhere it was crazy having the boys there they just couldn't move it was
21:23it was horrible it was horrible the kind of cesspit of journalism that sometimes it can all descend into
21:30well what can you tell us what's the latest well karen there's been quite a lot of movement here at
21:35the apartment this is the apartment just uh beyond me here where uh stephen actually passed away
21:39suddenly it's immediately like get the story
21:45what has happened what has happened nobody uh really speaking in the boys and camp officially
21:51yet but obviously there's quite a lot of uh speculation behind the scenes
21:55so then you're starting to get around the hotels and what clubs was he in and try to put this
21:59together
21:59he was found by police and taken here to one of the island's mortuaries although nothing has been
22:04confirmed officially it's thought gately and his partner arrived back here you know we we've no idea
22:09what happened to him you know it's only what we've read and you know in the press and stuff
22:15conspiracy theories are running wild all the reporters they're exchanging stories well i heard
22:19this and i heard that lots of innuendo lots of chatter about the circumstances around his death
22:25some of the rubbish that was written was just horrible the worst for me was they were saying it must
22:31be in drugs i was like screaming inside because like i knew like there was absolutely no way it was
22:40quite incredible the the most the ridiculous articles that were written there was one in particular
22:47stephen's sexuality had led to his death if he's gay it must mean that he's got this incredibly
22:56you know outrageous hidden lifestyle oh he'd been out on a bender and overdosed on drugs we were hearing
23:05everything having known stephen for over a decade he was the last man to you know have a hedonistic
23:14lifestyle or a dangerous lifestyle it's the first time i've ever looked at my own industry my own world
23:20what i'd been part of and gone you scumbags my mother um found uh two men at the end of
23:28her bed
23:28taking pictures of my parents as they woke basically broke into our house and and went up the stairs and
23:37took pictures with everything that was happening i was just waiting for the autopsy report to confirm
23:45that it was something else because i knew it was something else pathologists here have concluded that
23:54he did not die as a result of alcohol nor drugs he had a heart defect that nobody knew about
24:02because
24:03of the heart defect his lungs filled with fluid we found out i have the same heart condition stephen has
24:13it's funny how just you know a little tablet every day just sort of keeps that under control and
24:19if stephen only knew people didn't bother their arses to really read up on what happened they just see
24:26the the headlines in the newspapers and they just assume that he's overdosed oh you're in that battle
24:32that dead guy what did he kill himself i've gone from not to ten in a second at times you
24:39want to insult
24:39my brother i'll fucking kill you you know i don't care how big or strong you are you'd have to
24:45kill
24:45me to stop me but to hear that they were now putting like a name you know to what he
24:52died from
24:53makes it a little bit a little bit easier just because it was just like you could breathe again you
25:00know
25:09we brought stephen home
25:13margaret stephen's mom asked us to look after the funeral arrangements
25:22we didn't like the idea of him being alone in the church overnight
25:28he didn't like the cold he didn't like being alone
25:32so we offered to stay tonight with him in the church to keep him company
25:43when everybody else left and there was just the five of us
25:48there was a great sense of peace of unity
25:59i don't want to say sadness because believe it or not we actually had quite a comedic night
26:08and the usual joking that used to go on in the very early days when everything was innocent and naive
26:22for that night that emerged
26:26we put easels all around the church of pictures of stephen and we walked around looking at the different
26:33pictures the different smiles the the energy in his face and we talked to him we knew what his part
26:39would be we all knew it we didn't have to say it we could feel his voice and his energy
26:44and we joked
26:45and we laughed and we talked about old stories and what a thing to share with those boys and with
26:51steo those very last moments we still had him you know in in some way we still had him just
26:58the five of
26:59us together and you hold on as long as you can yeah but the morning came around real fast
27:16we had a mass a special mass prepared for stephen it was really only family and the lads and friends
27:23close friends and when we turned up the church there was people lined for miles and miles
27:33there was an ocean of photographers as well flashing away as we were going in
27:40so um i went over to the photographers and i said you're welcome to come in i said everybody can
27:45come
27:45in and they all like sort of stepped up to come in and i said you can leave your cameras
27:49there
27:50and then you can come in and pay your respects you know because he didn't pay your respect to
27:56him when he was alive you know none of them came in yeah
28:06we can only have so many in here in the church and i know we've so many many people outside
28:10so just
28:11thanks to you for coming along to share in this special day to remember steven
28:17steven was a force to be reckoned with a true friend full of love and friendship
28:23he brought color to the band and that barn now simply feels black and white without him
28:30we're gonna really miss your brother we love you we always will
28:38we love you
28:43carrying his coffin with the other guys you could have heard a pain drop
28:53and this is on a street that was the toughest part to grow up in dublin
29:00and the height of respect that the people showed for this boy from their neighborhood
29:09it broke me
29:15the love he had was gorgeous to witness it's a rare thing everybody loved him
29:24he was a true pop star he loved life
29:28you know he paved the way for so many to know it was okay i mean i hope that's not
29:34a legacy what is
29:37when i think of steven all i can see is um him being like four years of age
29:44with his little t-shirt on with miss piggy on the front of it very innocent and shy and just
29:52looking
29:52looking up wanting to give you his hand for you to just take him just so lovable and kind and
30:01you know just a lovely person
30:16it felt better
30:19to be in each other's company than not to be
30:33we decided that maybe you know the right thing to do and steven's memory is to keep going
30:42shouldn't have
30:44the the dynamic changed what it felt like to be in the band
30:49sometimes it was hard just to do the gig the three fellas and one missing
30:56the void was massive and it made you feel so self-conscious it made you feel like we were
31:02shit it made you feel that we weren't the audience just wasn't buying us anymore you know
31:10we went on and off over the years that followed ten years a couple of tours
31:19never felt the same for me it wasn't until he was gone that i realized how much
31:25he was the glue that kept a lot of the band together
31:31whilst boys were still being successful still selling a lot of tickets still touring all over
31:35the world to me it felt as if it was time to take a break but rather than splitting up
31:43and falling out
31:45announced the farewell tour i'm not saying anything's flagging anything but i'm just saying
31:53it got more and more intense and relationships broke down within the band i spotted arrogance the growth of ego
32:07it just became hard work
32:11people started just behaving badly
32:17and when that when that happens something's gonna give
32:22it came to a head in 2019
32:29i saw it all i was ready to get the out of there
32:33it's when the band imploded
32:54i'm always ready for it
32:552019 was a tough tour we went everywhere
33:00i got a sense that towards the end people were just holding on tight enjoying the ride
33:06having fun when i can't
33:12i can't i can't i've got to sing every day i've got to last two hours on stage and you
33:15know i've got
33:16to be able to perform and and in tokyo i just felt the piss was being taken
33:27if you're coming tonight have a great time because we certainly are going to have a fantastic time
33:31see you later
33:33i always found going on stage a bit of a a party anyway it's everyone out there is having a
33:38great
33:38time i needed a great time too i mean they had been out all day and they were drinking all
33:43day
33:44and yeah it was messy
33:50we certainly uh partied a little harder than we usually did
34:04it was the end of the road
34:09i think that they interpreted me as seeing their carry-on as infantile
34:19that is how i seen it
34:22i'm sure if you talk to any one of the the fans that any one of those shows
34:26they'll tell you that they had the best night of their lives it was the worst it was the worst
34:31i had
34:31seen in all of our years
34:38so i went at the mall told them how i felt it was a tennis match from that guy to
34:44that guy to that guy
34:45you're not pulling your weight like i'm pulling my weight the job was always done you know he's done a
34:50great job and we did our job the way we did you know i gave it all at my detriment
34:57i gave everything
34:59to be the lead man you take on most of the work don't complain about us who aren't working as
35:05hard
35:05we don't have the opportunity it's very different you were the dude who wanted to be in the front so
35:11take
35:12your fucking role and do it it had reached a complete stage of uh malignancy i had enough
35:23the next night there was a clash between keith and mikey in the dressing room there are things that
35:28happened that were cruel and i'm not gonna express any more than that my mother always said if you
35:38haven't got anything nice to say don't say anything at all we left japan uh some of us not talking
35:47with
35:48each other and yet we still had to do the final five nights in the palladium
36:04all the venues we played however big the venue might have been we always shared a dressing room
36:10always shared a dressing room and when we turned up at the palladium
36:16our names are on different doors we lasted 25 years flying on the same plane in the same cars the
36:24same room
36:26and the final five shows that we were ever going to do we were going to do it on our
36:31own
36:35we went through the motions got through the five shows a very very big anti-climax there was no
36:42hullabaloo there was no group hug there was no well done there was no one from the record
36:48company walking on stage with a 10 times platinum disc and saying thanks for everything
36:54i just wanted to get out of there get away from that toxic environment
37:03the realization came that this is the end of the road it's over
37:21i haven't seen anybody since that night
37:29that's when i began to understand i need to make some changes you know
37:42i've spent the last 10 years saying yes looking after everyone else making sure everyone else is
37:48all right but only now am i saying no no i gotta think of me
37:54so that i can be here to watch my children grow up
38:00for me personally i wouldn't be able to survive in that that world anymore i i had to get out
38:05and i
38:06i cannot do that to my family go back in there
38:12it's an addictive drug
38:15because i took a back seat for such a long time over my career
38:20i feel that i still have so much left to prove to myself
38:25it's a real headfuck
38:28we've all moved on
38:30i've got westlife you know i've had a great career in music so i'm happy
38:37i wouldn't have changed anything it wasn't perfect but it was perfect for me
38:44am i done i'm gonna go i'm gonna run
38:54the music and the stage and the lights i can leave that behind
39:00but the friendship i think is what it is more than anything else
39:04it's a story as much as we had had enough of being around each other hello hello
39:14i couldn't bear to lose any of the boys
39:16i hope you haven't been here too long
39:17been all the morning all morning
39:19i could put his glasses on too close too close
39:24how are you good to see you
39:25look like jane elton john oh man that's mad you're blind as a bat
39:29i have a lot of anxiety and i feel a lot of of the pain
39:34stuff that we've all gone through
39:36but put me together with them and that doesn't exist
39:39looking better as always you too
39:42where'd you get it
39:46kindergarten kids
39:50as soon as they walk in the room it's like we've never left
39:53no no here we go here we go here we go here we go my head's better than yours
39:56i'm keeping it
39:58it's like we're frozen in time
40:07i wish them the absolute best in their lives i wish them nothing but happiness
40:11i hold no grudges no animosity nothing however
40:21i don't want to go back
40:26to how i felt for many years
40:30and to see them
40:33if it were for too long would remind me of that
40:38and my future is far too important to me
40:44to waste it looking back at my past
40:49but i wish everybody well
40:53for me one of the biggest regrets is that i clashed a lot with mikey and me and him are
41:00very
41:00very alike the the the amount of time that we didn't get on that took its toll on me as
41:06a human
41:06being you know what i mean really sad but that's yeah but that's you can't get those years back
41:11it didn't have to be that way if we all had have had better skills at understanding each other
41:22better we're boys and we're men and we don't talk like that it was never in me to go oh
41:29lads i don't
41:30i don't feel great today it doesn't exist in a man's world i wish it had i have parked all
41:36of
41:36that emotion but we were kids row yeah we were kids i was incredibly insecure and i don't know i
41:42think we all were you know what i mean like that's they were fundamental years of you know growth
41:47multi-mental mental
41:52there's nothing more therapeutic than reminiscing about the best times of your life
41:59it reminds you of how lucky you have been the rds show the first biggest show back in the rds
42:04i'm looking back at that you know the song that i used to do when i put my trousers off
42:08it's hard to f**king fathom do you know what i mean can you remember the times with steel
42:15i remember being in kuala lumpur and i didn't know if that was south america or asia
42:18you and i with our ghetto blaster listening to bleeding enya you know in 94 95 don't tell any hip
42:24-hop
42:24hip-hop man i am so grateful for all that i have endured and experienced good and bad because it's
42:39brought me to be the man i am today
42:44every single day i have something to do with music waking up with a spring in my step
42:54the guy before i joined boys on was slim healthy fit full of vitality full of confidence full of passion
43:07that that's the guy that's returning
43:13there's a great sense of liberation
43:24i think we'll always be what we always are
43:29and that's brothers in arms oh cheating cheating boys who grew up on the north side of dublin
43:37that got catapulted around the world
43:41there could have been you know a million other lads in ireland that got in that band
43:47but i don't think they would have been as f**ked up as the five of us were
43:52and that's what made us brilliant
43:56and when you think about it starting off playing in front of 25 people on the back of a truck
44:01to
44:01to play into 100 000 people in hyde park how amazing was that it's a hell of a ride success
44:11and all of the good times really do outweigh all the bad times
44:18these boys are my boys and i will love them forever in the day
44:24and when we're together stephen gately is alive again and that's what's the most special part
44:31we did have a great laugh
44:35and it's like looking back at a picture saying god this is amazing
44:46that's our story it was a good one
44:52they came to you and asked you should we get back together and do a reunion show what would you
44:56say
44:59well well that's a question
45:04look i'll be lying to you if i said there isn't a spark of excitement in my mind people as
45:11far as
45:11the eye can see and the roar of the crowd that yeah i would love to experience that again who
45:18wouldn't
45:20but there's so much more going on backstage so perhaps leave well enough alone
45:28or maybe i know i said i'll never go on tour again but they stayed there going on tour
45:34i'm not getting left behind you're mad who knows
45:56so
46:00so
46:13you
46:14you
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