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00:00:28For more information, visit www.fema.org
00:00:40Hello? Cheryl, we have to talk about our birthday plans. I mean, it's only two days away, and we still
00:00:47haven't decided the perfect way to celebrate. So, I was thinking, maybe we could all take a trip, too.
00:00:54Sue, I meant to tell you before, but I wanted to be sure. I think I'm going to spend my
00:01:00birthday with Jake. I'm going to lose my virginity to him. You know, I want to surprise him.
00:01:07What? But you can't. I mean, I thought we were going to wait until marriage. Besides, you can't do that
00:01:14to us.
00:01:15You can't break tradition that way. This is bad. You know, I'm going to tell Lexi. She's going to be
00:01:22very unhappy about this.
00:01:32Come on, Lexi.
00:01:47So, girls, what are we going to do for our birthday?
00:01:52Sue, we have plenty of time to figure something out.
00:01:56But this is the big 1-8. I mean, every year since her mom's met in the hospital, we've done
00:02:02something new and special, but this has to be newer and more special.
00:02:06So, what's something we've never done before?
00:02:10Mushrooms?
00:02:11No, not like that. Like something nice. Like maybe a trip.
00:02:16Like a mushroom trip? No.
00:02:21Sorry, Sue. I have a date.
00:02:24So do I. Sorry, Sue.
00:02:27Don't worry, Sue. We'll figure it out.
00:02:42Oh, flowers. Are these from you?
00:02:44Yeah, sure. Here you go.
00:02:49No card, but I thought I saw one.
00:02:51I didn't know how to put my feelings into words. I guess, um, you still make me nervous.
00:03:01Oh, Jake.
00:03:06Maybe I should come in and hang out for a minute.
00:03:09Uh, no, Jake. Not yet. When we do it, I want it to be really special. The best night of
00:03:15my life.
00:03:15It will be. I promise. It'll always be amazing. With you and me. Together.
00:03:30Jake, no. I have to go. I have to work on my art project.
00:03:35You know, I thought art was going to be a really easy elective, but I guess I should have taken
00:03:40more math.
00:03:42Uh, so you're going to come to my birthday, okay? This Saturday?
00:03:46Of course.
00:03:51Thanks.
00:03:54Okay. Bye.
00:04:07Oh, baby. You're so hot. I'm going to do you so good.
00:04:11Oh, yeah, baby.
00:04:13Yeah.
00:04:13What was your name again?
00:04:14Rod. Sex guy.
00:04:21Lexi is so upset, she's speechless.
00:04:26Yeah, right. I bet.
00:04:34Cheryl's losing her virginity on Saturday? Oh, no.
00:04:39Does not compute. Want to talk in person ASAP.
00:04:47Oh, huh. Hi.
00:04:51When did you get home?
00:04:52So, is it true?
00:04:54Yes, it is.
00:04:56It's just, it's the right time and Jake's the right man.
00:05:00I mean, he's handsome and smart and wealthy and he has a really bright future ahead of him.
00:05:08So, I just think it's the right time.
00:05:11Lexi, tell her, losing our virginity is one of those milestones we should all face together.
00:05:17On our birthday, yes, but not on this birthday.
00:05:19Like, maybe on our 23rd birthday or maybe even like our 28th.
00:05:26Maybe.
00:05:28Listen, guys, I'm, I know it's tradition, but I'm sorry.
00:05:36I know it's tradition, but I'm sorry.
00:05:46But Cheryl, Sue is right.
00:05:48We do always do something special on our birthday.
00:05:52Does Jake really have such a tiny little needle dick?
00:05:56It's not Jake.
00:05:58It's the male ideal.
00:06:01Like, a Greek god or Sue's dad.
00:06:05Right.
00:06:07Yeah, I guess you're right.
00:06:09I mean it kind of sucks.
00:06:10I'm not really an artist.
00:06:12Girls, can you just stop changing the subject?
00:06:14The point is, we should all lose our virginities together on the same day.
00:06:18And I'm just not ready yet.
00:06:21I'm waiting for a sign.
00:06:22And then I'll know it's right.
00:06:23Look, I can go either way.
00:06:26I mean, I'm fine with just 69, 79, anal.
00:06:31I don't feel any rush to actually do the deed.
00:06:35Besides, I know it'll never live up to my rabbit anyway.
00:06:39But if you want to do it this year, then maybe we all should.
00:06:44You know, it could be like our big 18th birthday thing.
00:06:52Where are you going at 6.30 in the morning?
00:06:55To church to pray for you.
00:06:57I want to be first in line.
00:07:00I'm getting this.
00:07:01Yeah, me too.
00:07:12Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned.
00:07:14It's been four days since my last confession.
00:07:17I accused myself of the following sins.
00:07:22Okay, so I'm really embarrassed to talk about this, but it's about sex.
00:07:31I mean, not me.
00:07:32I've never gone past second base with a guy.
00:07:37I've never even seen a guy as...
00:07:39Well, there was that one time I took the pants off my Ken doll.
00:07:42But I was dressing him up as Jesus.
00:07:45And I wanted to see his thing.
00:07:47But there was nothing there.
00:07:51Okay, so it's about my friends.
00:07:53My best friends.
00:07:56They're gonna do something really bad this weekend.
00:07:58Okay.
00:08:00Third base?
00:08:02What?
00:08:03No.
00:08:04Like, sex.
00:08:05Like, intercourse?
00:08:07With boys they barely even know.
00:08:08I mean, they really need us intervention.
00:08:10If you know what I mean.
00:08:12All the way.
00:08:13Go all the way.
00:08:15What?
00:08:16What?
00:08:17What?
00:08:18Ah!
00:08:20Ah!
00:08:21How could you do this?
00:08:23You're a bad, bad person.
00:08:28What?
00:08:35Yes.
00:08:36Yes!
00:08:37Run!
00:08:38Run!
00:08:38Run!
00:08:40Ah!
00:08:42Damn it!
00:08:44Fuck the Yankees!
00:08:48Sorry.
00:09:13Sue!
00:09:14It is 1 p.m.
00:09:16Would you have a little consideration?
00:09:18I'm trying to sleep.
00:09:20Geez.
00:09:21Can you guys please keep it down?
00:09:24I have an announcement to make.
00:09:26I want to do it.
00:09:29Do you hear me?
00:09:30I want to do it.
00:09:32What?
00:09:33What?
00:09:33This weekend.
00:09:33This weekend.
00:09:33On our birthday.
00:09:35Do what?
00:09:38It.
00:09:39Screw.
00:09:40Screw.
00:09:40You know, screwing.
00:09:41Boning.
00:09:42Making the beast with two backs.
00:09:44You know, shagging.
00:09:45Fucking.
00:09:48You do.
00:09:50Uh, but what about all your religious stuff?
00:09:53And, um, what about your sign from heaven?
00:09:55Oh, I got a sign.
00:09:57Oh, I got a sign.
00:09:57At church.
00:09:58Really?
00:10:00Well, okay, great.
00:10:03We're all in then.
00:10:05So, we'll have a big pool party and we'll do it there.
00:10:08Right?
00:10:10Right.
00:10:13I'll start making the shopping list.
00:10:23Hey, Frank!
00:10:26Hi, Sue.
00:10:28Guys, we didn't invite Frank to the party.
00:10:30I don't know.
00:10:31Do you think he'd even have fun?
00:10:33Yeah.
00:10:33He's blind.
00:10:35Blind people can do everything regular people can do.
00:10:42Wait, are you back?
00:10:44Hey.
00:10:45Um, I was wondering.
00:10:47We're throwing this party tomorrow night.
00:10:49It's for our birthdays.
00:10:51Do you want to come?
00:10:52Do you think he can see up my shorts?
00:11:07Well, my house looks done.
00:11:10Tomorrow's the big day.
00:11:11We finally turn 18.
00:11:13And finally lose our virginity.
00:11:16Well, we better get our baby sleep because the party starts tomorrow at 2.
00:11:20So, okay, we know who Cheryl's gonna do it with.
00:11:23Jake.
00:11:24And I'll probably do that guy Rod.
00:11:26But Sue, who are you gonna pick?
00:11:27To pop your chin?
00:11:29It's easy.
00:11:30I've known for the past six years.
00:11:32Ever since catechism.
00:11:36What the fuck is catechism?
00:11:38I think it's a baby panda wrapped in peanut butter.
00:11:40Yeah.
00:11:49My soulmate.
00:11:53Chris?
00:11:55Sue.
00:11:56You, um, might want to think about picking a backup.
00:12:00I mean...
00:12:01What?
00:12:01No.
00:12:02Chris is perfect.
00:12:03He played Jesus in Jesus Christ Superstar last year at camp.
00:12:06Plus, his name's Chris.
00:12:08It's a sign.
00:12:09Sue, the only sign is that Chris has a major case of gay face.
00:12:14What?
00:12:16He does not.
00:12:17Anyway, there's no such thing as gay face.
00:12:19He looks just like Justin Bieber.
00:12:22With a little bit of Zac Efron and just a hint of Ryan Seacrest.
00:12:26Who the fuck's Ryan Seacrest?
00:12:29Look, Chris is my soulmate.
00:12:32Okay, well, sweet dreams.
00:12:35See you in the morning.
00:12:43I knew it would happen someday.
00:12:45I just didn't expect it to happen so soon.
00:13:20You're so perfect.
00:13:58I knew that's what I look like.
00:14:18Too bad no one could ever compare to you.
00:14:36Tomorrow's the day.
00:15:00Oh my gosh.
00:15:02They're coming.
00:15:04Lexi, Cheryl, hurry.
00:15:09Ew, why?
00:15:11It's for Jake to unwrap me.
00:15:13It's gonna be really sexy.
00:15:14I'm gonna suppress it.
00:15:16You're gonna die of asphyxiation.
00:15:18It's gonna be really sexy.
00:15:20It's stupid.
00:15:21Just screw him.
00:15:22That's what he wants.
00:15:23That's what all guys want.
00:15:25Who hurt you as a child?
00:15:27Oh, Christ.
00:15:28And I have your mouth, too.
00:15:31Anyway, what guys want is someone who's sexy,
00:15:34not someone they can just have sex with.
00:15:36You're an idiot.
00:15:37A very smooth, plastic-wrapped idiot.
00:15:42Guys, seriously, come on, hurry up.
00:15:49Oh, what a cool bracelet.
00:15:52I love it.
00:15:54Um...
00:15:55You should put that down, though, because it's like...
00:15:57It's very fragile.
00:15:58Yeah.
00:15:59Set it down.
00:16:01Hurry up.
00:16:05Those are your anal beads, right?
00:16:06Yeah.
00:16:07All right, let's go.
00:16:28Oh, Jesus.
00:16:30Whoa!
00:16:31Hold up.
00:16:33Oh, we're gonna have some fun.
00:16:35Oh, Attack of the Wet T-shirts.
00:16:37Nice!
00:16:38Ha, ha, ha, ha!
00:16:39It's gonna be...
00:16:40Oh, fuck.
00:16:42Ah, fuck.
00:16:43Check, check, check, check, check, check.
00:16:48Happy birthday, Lex!
00:16:51No, Joanna, we said no gifts.
00:16:54That is lip poison to plump your lips,
00:16:57but be careful it stings.
00:16:58And the other one is edible massage oil.
00:17:02Oh, how did you know?
00:17:04I mean, I'm gonna use both of these tonight.
00:17:06All right.
00:17:06Okay, please.
00:17:12Foster, such a cutie.
00:17:15Please don't touch my service time.
00:17:17All right, sorry.
00:17:19Are you okay now?
00:17:20Yeah, I'm fine.
00:17:21Okay.
00:17:21See you later.
00:17:25I can't believe you haven't heard of it.
00:17:27This is crazy.
00:17:29Jake!
00:17:30Hi!
00:17:31Hey, Ben.
00:17:33Happy birthday.
00:17:36Oh, you didn't have to give me anything.
00:17:39What?
00:17:40You want a beer?
00:17:44No.
00:17:48Oh, hon.
00:17:50Come here.
00:17:53I have your present here.
00:17:55I'll give it to you later.
00:17:57I'll give it to you later.
00:17:57The time's right.
00:17:59Oh.
00:17:59You didn't have to give me anything.
00:18:02And I have a present for you that I want you to unwrap later.
00:18:08Hey, Ralph.
00:18:10We need you to settle this bet over here real quick.
00:18:13We'll bet.
00:18:17All right, this is my man right here.
00:18:20Hey.
00:18:20Hey.
00:18:21How you doing?
00:18:22Hey.
00:18:32Check it out!
00:18:35Dare me?
00:18:53Oh, dude.
00:18:54Look at those.
00:18:55Are those real?
00:18:56I don't know.
00:18:57Have you guys seen Cheryl?
00:18:58Hey!
00:18:59I do!
00:18:59Move!
00:19:00Come on!
00:19:00Lame!
00:19:01Oh.
00:19:02All right.
00:19:02Okay.
00:19:03I'll see you guys later.
00:19:04Go do some push-ups or something.
00:19:06Oh.
00:19:0620 bucks says, by the end of the day, I will be motorboating those kitties.
00:19:11Yeah!
00:19:13They're fake anyways.
00:19:14Who cares?
00:19:16Okay.
00:19:20Oh, dude, dude.
00:19:22I'm blind, you fucking asshole.
00:19:28Sue, no.
00:19:29It's your birthday.
00:19:30Here, let me.
00:19:30Joanna, no.
00:19:31Just go enjoy the party.
00:19:33Come on.
00:19:36What happened?
00:19:39Hey.
00:19:39Do my lips look any plumper?
00:19:41I put this stuff on, but I can't really feel anything yet.
00:19:46Have you guys seen Jake?
00:19:47I haven't seen him anywhere.
00:19:48He just, like, disappeared.
00:20:03Are these real?
00:20:04Are they real?
00:20:04Of course they are.
00:20:07How come I've never met you before?
00:20:10I don't know.
00:20:10Maybe he's just going to be around.
00:20:12Ryan, have you seen Jake?
00:20:13Um, I think he's around or something.
00:20:17Maybe upstairs.
00:20:18I don't know.
00:20:19Oh.
00:20:20Maybe you want to go get my birthday present.
00:20:22That's probably where he went.
00:20:25Little roll.
00:20:28Liquid courage?
00:20:29Yeah.
00:20:30Mm-hmm.
00:20:31Atta girl.
00:20:35Vodka cranberry?
00:20:37It's really simple.
00:20:40Well, I guess it's now or never.
00:20:42I can go meet Rob.
00:20:44Sue?
00:20:45Are you okay?
00:20:46Sue?
00:20:47Relax.
00:20:50They're just all eyes.
00:20:51Okay.
00:20:52Nothing to be scared of.
00:20:53Seriously.
00:20:54Gonna be fine.
00:20:55Is Chris here?
00:21:02Wow.
00:21:02It's even worse in person, isn't it?
00:21:05No.
00:21:05He does not have gatefeeds.
00:21:08I'm gonna prove it to you.
00:21:10I'm gonna do it.
00:21:16Wow.
00:21:16It's even worse in person, isn't it?
00:21:19No.
00:21:20He does not have gatefeeds.
00:21:22I'm gonna prove it to you.
00:21:23No.
00:21:24I'm gonna do it.
00:21:25I'm gonna do this.
00:21:27Good luck.
00:21:30Hey, you can do this.
00:21:32Just act like a slut.
00:21:37Just pretend you're Lexi.
00:21:40Oh, I'm gonna do it.
00:21:45I'm gonna do it.
00:21:47I'm gonna do it.
00:21:48I'm gonna do it.
00:21:48Yeah, my favorite chapter is Solomon Gmore.
00:21:51Chris.
00:21:52Hi.
00:21:54Can I talk to you?
00:21:56Huh?
00:21:57Um, in private?
00:21:59No.
00:22:13Oh, hey, Lexi, hey, Lexi.
00:22:16What?
00:22:19Chris, you're so sexy.
00:22:22Ever since you played Jesus at camp, I've just, I've known that we were meant to be
00:22:27together.
00:22:29And, I really want to...
00:22:32Oh, what are you doing?
00:22:34Is that wrong?
00:22:36Sue, what's gotten into you?
00:22:38Nothing.
00:22:39I'm sorry.
00:22:40I don't know how to do this.
00:22:41Sue.
00:22:44Sue, Sue, Sue.
00:22:47I understand these urges.
00:22:52And, you know, I like you too.
00:22:56Really?
00:22:56You do?
00:22:58I do.
00:22:59I really do.
00:23:01I like you too.
00:23:03Really?
00:23:04You do?
00:23:05I do.
00:23:05I really do.
00:23:07It's just...
00:23:10I've devoted a lot of my life to one certain man.
00:23:14Right.
00:23:16Lexi said you were...
00:23:17Jesus.
00:23:18Oh.
00:23:19That man.
00:23:21Of course.
00:23:22What did you think?
00:23:23Oh, nothing.
00:23:25So we can still do this then?
00:23:28Oh, Sue.
00:23:30You know, for me, when I think about that man who died for our sins, when I think about him
00:23:41up there on that cross.
00:23:43So helpless.
00:23:45Yet so...
00:23:47Muscular.
00:23:49With his strong thighs crossed over each other so delicately beneath that ragged loincloth growing so hot.
00:24:03I'm so sweaty under that hot, hot sun.
00:24:09I just feel such compassion.
00:24:13I think about those things too.
00:24:14So you understand why I can't do this?
00:24:19Not really.
00:24:21I just find it too hard.
00:24:23It is to give in to carnal pleasure when he sacrificed so much for us.
00:24:33So...
00:24:43We're gonna go out there, right?
00:24:45Andy, we're gonna tell you throw these on.
00:24:47Jake.
00:24:47Hey, Ty.
00:24:48Whoa!
00:24:50Have you seen Jake?
00:24:51Uh, no.
00:24:53No.
00:24:54No.
00:24:54Alright.
00:24:58Okay.
00:24:58Alright, focus.
00:24:59Focus.
00:25:00Focus.
00:25:00Focus.
00:25:06Let's Half-game sehen PalestinianGeuchay.
00:25:06Oh, there he is.
00:25:11Oh, you got me the puppy that I wanted.
00:25:28How could you?
00:25:33Sue, what happened?
00:25:35Did you guys do it?
00:25:36Sue?
00:25:38He doesn't want me.
00:25:40Because he's gay.
00:25:41No, he's not.
00:25:43He just really loves Jesus.
00:25:45Oh, come on, Sue.
00:25:47The only reason we even liked him
00:25:49is because you knew he was never a real possibility for you.
00:25:53Look, the only way you're going to find out
00:25:56what kind of man you really want
00:25:57is to know what kind of woman you really are
00:26:00deep inside.
00:26:03What?
00:26:04Come with me.
00:26:05We're to meet your dark side.
00:26:15Out!
00:26:16Everyone out!
00:26:27Sue, it's time for you and your vagina
00:26:31to meet face-to-face.
00:26:44I really can't.
00:26:46I really don't think I can do this.
00:26:49I'm not letting you out until you look.
00:26:55I'm not letting you out until you look.
00:27:00Sue?
00:27:02Can you see it?
00:27:04Sue.
00:27:09I'm almost...
00:27:10I'm almost there.
00:27:15Oh!
00:27:17What?
00:27:19What?
00:27:20Sue, what happened?
00:27:21What did you see?
00:27:23A raccoon?
00:27:25What?
00:27:26You overshot it.
00:27:28Aim the mirror further up.
00:27:37I can't.
00:27:38Please don't make me do that again.
00:27:40Okay, fine.
00:27:41Fine.
00:27:42I didn't want to do this,
00:27:44but you leave me no choice.
00:27:46What?
00:27:47You really need an orgasm.
00:27:50Honestly,
00:27:50I don't know how you expected
00:27:52to ever have sex with someone else
00:27:54when you've never even had it with yourself.
00:27:56This really has to be your first step.
00:27:58Les,
00:27:59I'm ready.
00:28:00Coming.
00:28:01Sue,
00:28:01my black vibrator is somewhere in the top drawer.
00:28:03Just find it
00:28:04and use it.
00:28:06Wait,
00:28:07what does the black vibrator look like?
00:28:08It's black.
00:28:09It vibrates.
00:28:13Come on, Rod.
00:28:14Let's go to Sue's room.
00:28:18Don't come back
00:28:18until you have at least one orgasm.
00:28:32Hey, cutie!
00:28:34Cutie!
00:28:38Oh!
00:28:40Booseye!
00:28:41Oh, yeah!
00:28:46Bang.
00:28:47Bang.
00:28:49Bang.
00:28:50Good boy.
00:28:52Straighten up.
00:28:53Good boy.
00:28:54Good boy.
00:28:56He knows over a hundred commands.
00:29:00I'm sorry I can't see anything.
00:29:02That is not funny, Cheryl.
00:29:04What a bitch.
00:29:06Fortunately,
00:29:07when you're blind,
00:29:08you get used to things like that.
00:29:10Oh!
00:29:28Oh, shit.
00:29:29Oh, shit.
00:29:30Oh, shit.
00:29:45What's wrong with this thing?
00:29:49Nice shot.
00:29:51A direct hit.
00:30:06Cheryl, what is wrong?
00:30:09Lexi, it's Jake.
00:30:11He was getting a blowjob by some pink-haired girl.
00:30:15For sure?
00:30:17I mean, I know I've been putting off having sex with him, so maybe, maybe it's my fault.
00:30:21That's no excuse.
00:30:22He's a dirtbag.
00:30:24How dare he?
00:30:25No, it's awful.
00:30:26I mean, I thought I was gonna marry him.
00:30:30Oh, shit.
00:30:35It's a text.
00:30:37It's from him.
00:30:38Um, I can't bear myself to read it.
00:30:39Okay.
00:30:40Uh, he's looking for you.
00:30:42He wants to give you your birthday gift.
00:30:44Oh, I can't face him.
00:30:46Um, I have to go.
00:30:48I'm going.
00:30:48No, you can't just leave.
00:30:51Well, I can't stay and just pretend like nothing happened.
00:30:54I mean, maybe I should confront him.
00:30:56He'll either deny it or admit and promise never to do it again.
00:31:00Either way, it's bullshit.
00:31:02I see only one option.
00:31:05I'm leaving.
00:31:06Revenge sex.
00:31:08Re- I mean, what?
00:31:09What does that even mean?
00:31:10It means you find a guy, you screw his brains out, and you let Jake catch you.
00:31:17Revenge sex.
00:31:19Re- I mean, what?
00:31:20What does that even mean?
00:31:21It means you find a guy, you screw his brains out, and you let Jake catch you.
00:31:27But he- I mean, he doesn't even care.
00:31:29He doesn't even care about me.
00:31:30I mean, why would- he's just into other girls.
00:31:33Trust me, he'll care.
00:31:35Seriously, this is the worst thing you could do to him.
00:31:38To his ego.
00:31:39Just screw someone else when you've never even had sex with him.
00:31:43Especially if it's with someone smarter, better looking, and with a bigger dick.
00:31:50No, I- I couldn't.
00:31:51Plus, I mean, there's- there's no one smarter and better looking.
00:31:56Eric!
00:31:57He's perfect!
00:31:58Eric Hall?
00:31:59Are you kidding?
00:32:01I mean, he wouldn't even be into me.
00:32:03He likes your type.
00:32:05Really?
00:32:05And what type is that?
00:32:07He's bloody.
00:32:09Yeah.
00:32:10Trust me, he's amazing.
00:32:12I fooled around with him once.
00:32:13He has this great tongue ring.
00:32:15Oh, no.
00:32:16I could never fool around with somebody you fooled around with.
00:32:19Okay, then.
00:32:20Fine.
00:32:21We will find someone else.
00:32:23Someone that I haven't fooled around with.
00:32:29Okay, what does it matter that I fooled around with him?
00:32:32I mean, it's- you're not gonna marry the guy.
00:32:35No, I just couldn't do it.
00:32:37Fine.
00:32:38If you want to live the rest of your life knowing that you had one chance to do the right
00:32:42thing,
00:32:42to make your boyfriend feel like a total worthless piece of garbage,
00:32:46and possibly even scar him with the rest of his existence,
00:32:49and you chose not to do it,
00:32:51go ahead.
00:32:52But honestly, I don't know how you'll be able to live with your side.
00:32:56I don't know.
00:32:59But honestly, I don't know how you'll be able to live with yourself.
00:33:04I don't know.
00:33:06Trust me.
00:33:07It's going to work.
00:33:14I will intercept Jake and get him upstairs.
00:33:18Hi, Cheryl.
00:33:19Are you okay enough to chat with her?
00:33:21Oh, no.
00:33:34Hey.
00:33:36Happy birthday.
00:33:39Thanks.
00:33:45Thanks.
00:34:03have you guys seen jake
00:34:12so happy birthday
00:34:15uh do you know that most people think that the happy birthday song was
00:34:19from britain but it's actually from us u.s
00:34:26america united states i know where we live right
00:34:30of course
00:34:35i know where we live right of course
00:34:43hey jesus eric are you gonna make your move or not oh you want me to move yeah no i
00:34:48can totally
00:34:49move i just no you're fine
00:35:04jake
00:35:08so eric do you want to do it or not
00:35:10oh i'm sorry it what um it like monkey boning and like pigs in a blanket get real nasty
00:35:22oh oh you mean like uh right now i mean well yeah you know the sooner the better
00:35:33yeah sure i mean well yeah of course um i just never realized that you i mean
00:35:42whoo uh
00:35:45it's just
00:35:48you're so
00:35:50you're so beautiful
00:35:52okay um no casein right um of course sorry
00:36:03so um do you wanna unwrap me oh wow uh you're wrapped up like a hot pocket or leftover macaroni
00:36:13and cheese
00:36:15now that you're left over you're not
00:36:16uh you're fresh
00:36:21now that you're left over you're not
00:36:24uh you're fresh
00:36:26organic
00:36:28yep
00:36:31so the wrap
00:36:32right
00:36:33um
00:36:35where's the uh
00:36:37it's uh the end that i just like right over here
00:36:40oh oh yeah here it is
00:36:40uh it's where i see it
00:36:42um let me just uh
00:36:43uh
00:36:46ow ow ow
00:36:47sorry sorry sorry i um
00:36:49it's it's okay here
00:36:50do it again
00:36:53sorry i i uh
00:36:54i bite my nails so it's a little difficult
00:36:56you know what let me just lay on the bed
00:37:00okay
00:37:06uh
00:37:07let me just
00:37:08see
00:37:10oh here it is i got it
00:37:12all right
00:37:12just um pull it
00:37:14let me just
00:37:18oh jeez uh cheryl are you
00:37:21you okay
00:37:23uh
00:37:26hey cheryl are you okay
00:37:27hey cheryl are you okay
00:37:30oh jeez
00:37:31oh jeez
00:37:38well that was stupid
00:37:41yeah
00:37:48how are you doing tonight
00:37:49are you having a good time
00:37:50yeah
00:37:52jake i think i saw cheryl upstairs
00:37:56what
00:37:57i can't see you
00:37:58i can't hear you
00:37:59i don't have a beer
00:38:01chips are so damn salty
00:38:03jake
00:38:04sorry we're
00:38:05upstairs
00:38:05yeah
00:38:06hold on
00:38:08take a piss
00:38:09too much beer
00:38:11too much beer
00:38:25oh
00:38:34definitely
00:38:42man
00:38:43i don't want you to be able to see each other
00:38:55oh
00:38:58Oh. Well, okay.
00:39:00Okay.
00:39:17Finally. I, uh, let me just get the blinds.
00:39:20Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
00:39:22Um, don't, don't worry about it.
00:39:24What?
00:39:25I mean, I want us to be able to see each other.
00:39:30Uh-oh.
00:39:32Well, okay.
00:39:34Okay.
00:40:08Uh-oh.
00:40:12Uh-oh.
00:40:14Uh-oh.
00:40:16Uh-oh.
00:40:17Uh-oh.
00:40:17Uh-oh.
00:40:24Uh-oh.
00:40:24What are you doing?
00:40:26Uh...
00:40:27I think it's time.
00:40:29You know, to...
00:40:32Do it.
00:40:34Um, not yet. More foreplay.
00:40:36Uh-oh.
00:40:39Yeah.
00:40:39Uh-oh.
00:40:40Uh-oh.
00:40:43Uh-oh.
00:40:44Uh-oh.
00:40:44Uh-oh.
00:40:44It's so good.
00:40:47Oh.
00:40:49Yep.
00:40:50Oh, my God.
00:40:52Jaw. Jaw. Jaw. Jaw.
00:40:54What? What? What?
00:40:55Ah, ah, oh!
00:40:57Ah, dear.
00:40:59Ah-oh.
00:41:00Lock jaw, lock jaw.
00:41:01Is it even a thing?
00:41:03I don't know.
00:41:05Ah.
00:41:07Are you okay?
00:41:11No, no, no, no, it's, uh, it's fine.
00:41:14I'm just, uh, embarrassed.
00:41:17It's probably TMJ or fracture, swollen.
00:41:24You sure you're okay?
00:41:26Yeah, yeah, I'm fine.
00:41:27Okay, great.
00:41:28Have fun.
00:41:29Oh.
00:41:35Nah.
00:41:36Now, now, let's do it now.
00:41:38No, no, not yet.
00:41:38Not yet.
00:41:42Alright, I'm gonna come, I'm gonna come.
00:41:44No, no, no, not yet, no, no, No, no, no, not yet.
00:41:49Lexi, Lexi, oh sh.
00:41:55No, no, no, not yet.
00:41:57Lexi, o, shit.
00:42:00No, no, no, not yet.
00:42:02Lexi, Lexi.
00:42:02Oh, I'm so sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. It's been a really long time, and I just I haven't masturbated
00:42:08for anything
00:42:16Oh, hey, Jake
00:42:19How you doing?
00:42:22How's it going? Good
00:42:24Eric?
00:42:26Eric, help me. I'm glad I can't see anything
00:42:34Cheryl's in here
00:42:41Sup, brother?
00:42:42What the fuck is...
00:42:45Hey, wait
00:42:49Lex, still waiting
00:42:57Oh, I'm sorry. I can't see. I'm blind
00:43:02Damn it. I'm gonna save somebody to that bitch
00:43:06Hey, you
00:43:09You better stop making fun of the blind, or I'm gonna teach you a lesson
00:43:13Help!
00:43:15I'm so sorry
00:43:17I'll never make fun of the blind again
00:43:19Hey, hey, hey
00:43:21Hey, hey, hey, hey
00:43:49Watch the deer go round
00:43:52Yeah!
00:43:57This just isn't working.
00:44:00Nothing.
00:44:01What's the big deal about these vibrators, anyway?
00:44:06Lock your character, man, the lock sticks.
00:44:09Spark it up!
00:44:11Yes!
00:44:15Oh, man! I love this game!
00:44:18Hey, what are the controllers? We gotta play.
00:44:20Here, here, here.
00:44:20Okay, let me find another one.
00:44:25Woo!
00:44:27Look at this!
00:44:29Oh, my God!
00:44:31Fuel, fuel, fuel!
00:44:33Get that thing away, Jesus!
00:44:42Hey, dude, nice shot.
00:44:46Wasn't me.
00:44:51Whoa, whoa, nice!
00:44:55Are you sitting on there or something?
00:44:58Hey, you found the grenade launcher! Nice, nice!
00:45:14Do you have the extra controller?
00:45:27Whoa!
00:45:30You are the controller!
00:45:32No, I just...
00:45:33I didn't... I swear, I...
00:45:46All right.
00:45:48Hey, Sue!
00:45:50Where are you going, man?
00:45:54It's okay.
00:45:55Hey, Sue!
00:45:58Hey, Sue!
00:46:07Hey, didn't you hear me calling you?
00:46:10Yeah, I just needed to...
00:46:12Oh, sure.
00:46:16Listen, Sue, I was rethinking what I said earlier.
00:46:21You were?
00:46:23You mean...
00:46:25Yeah.
00:46:29So you think we should give it a try?
00:46:33Can we go get a drink?
00:46:37Wow, um, your toilet's really clogged.
00:46:42You know what?
00:46:44I gotta go.
00:46:45Um, happy birthday.
00:46:46No, no, there wasn't.
00:46:48I didn't...
00:46:49Oh, God, never mind.
00:46:56It's the end of the world.
00:46:58Fantastic, fantastic, fantastic.
00:47:03I'll be...
00:47:03This was the worst idea ever.
00:47:07Never going to have sex.
00:47:09Ow.
00:47:11Ow.
00:47:31Hello?
00:47:32A little attention here.
00:47:34Oh, yeah.
00:47:35Sorry.
00:47:41Lex, don't be selfish.
00:47:44All right.
00:47:45Sorry.
00:47:47All right.
00:47:48All right.
00:47:59Oh, jeez.
00:48:01Who invented this stupid position anyway?
00:48:05Too much fucking multitasking.
00:48:07Screw it.
00:48:17Oh.
00:48:19Oh.
00:48:21Oh.
00:48:22Oh.
00:48:24Oh.
00:48:24Oh.
00:48:25Oh.
00:48:25Oh.
00:48:52That was bad.
00:48:56That was so bad.
00:49:11Joanna, do you know a guy named JJ?
00:49:16I think that guy's name starts with a J.
00:49:22Hey.
00:49:24So, don't I start with a J?
00:49:27Yes, it does.
00:49:28So, you're JJ?
00:49:31Uh-oh.
00:49:32Oh.
00:49:35Oh.
00:49:37Oh.
00:49:38Oh.
00:49:38Oh.
00:49:40Oh.
00:49:41Oh.
00:49:44Oh.
00:49:49Oh.
00:49:56Oh.
00:49:57Welcome to 1-900 Confess.
00:49:59Would you like a priest or a nun today?
00:50:02A nun?
00:50:03Please punch in your credit card number.
00:50:10Please hold.
00:50:12Oh, my goodness.
00:50:16one nine hundred confession how may I be of service it's been one day since my
00:50:21last confession I accused myself of the following sins one day I would have
00:50:35come this morning but it's my 18th birthday go on okay well I've been
00:50:42touching myself inappropriately well actually what's your problem a washing
00:50:49machine touched her you know I sat on a washing machine and well all right freak
00:50:57times up what but what do I do just unplug the thing no but but I think I
00:51:03might have had an orgasm well then be happy you found the perfect man I'm
00:51:09serious look honey you seem like a nice young lady so I'll tell you this
00:51:17masturbation isn't a sin no conditions you broke no covenant with God it's not in
00:51:24the Bible so the washing machine could touch me anytime morning afternoon night
00:51:33yes and other things can touch you accidental masturbation is not a sin
00:51:38neither is intentional masturbation God's pretty cool that way he sure is now run
00:51:47along how do you know all that because I'm a nun now eat my pussy bitch
00:51:59huh accidental masturbation who'd it think
00:52:13revenge sex with a stupid fucking idiot oh god I'm getting out of here
00:52:31fucking douchebag damn it now I have to get laid if it's the last thing I do you go girl
00:52:42what what are you doing here we needed someplace private but hey listen if you're serious about
00:52:50getting laid yeah if you want someone great I mean really the best ever no offense Frank the blind guy
00:53:02really I'm telling you he's amazing I had food sex with him a few weeks ago it was like
00:53:10nothing I've ever experienced before it was like we used all our senses everything
00:53:19if you're interested I'll set it up all right
00:53:30what about him Jeremy yeah I know Jeremy I think I fooled around with him once I didn't know his
00:53:39last name though
00:53:41it's Jones Jeremy Jones this all makes sense excuse me Jeremy hi who's on the phone
00:53:53oh that's my new girlfriend no meter could be here in like an hour wait you have a girlfriend
00:54:15oh hey Frank sit
00:54:22oh you meant you meant the dog
00:54:29relax you need to relax and calm down
00:54:42oh I'm I'm relaxed I'm fine
00:54:45why are you biting you now I'm not
00:54:51how did you know that
00:54:55corner
00:55:00sit
00:55:02roll over
00:55:06oh you mean me
00:55:10roll over
00:55:14oh you mean me
00:55:16oh how do you
00:55:17how do you want me to
00:55:20just like that
00:55:22oh
00:55:33oh
00:55:33oh
00:55:34I shouldn't even be doing this but
00:55:36considering it a teachable moment
00:55:38okay
00:55:43oh
00:55:46see me with your hands
00:55:52all right
00:56:01you know I should really I have a boyfriend I shouldn't be doing this really
00:56:09oh
00:56:10ooh
00:56:10ooh
00:56:19mmm
00:56:20peanut butter
00:56:36Frank, Frank, oh, oh, Frank.
00:56:51Frank, oh, Frank, oh, Frank, oh, Frank.
00:57:21My chips.
00:57:23Guys, why are you making such a mess?
00:57:26Sorry.
00:57:35It's just a case of accidental masturbation.
00:57:37That's all.
00:57:43No, let me do this.
00:57:44Go away.
00:57:45I got it.
00:57:46I got it.
00:57:46No, really, please, I want to help.
00:57:51Okay, everybody out.
00:57:54Leave, I have to back.
00:58:10You're not even getting the chips.
00:58:12They're over here.
00:58:13I see some dust over here, so there's just so much dust on this floor.
00:58:24This is a dirty floor.
00:58:26Such a dirty, dirty floor.
00:58:54I think I got all that.
00:58:56I'm just gonna, I'll see how, oh.
00:59:09Frankie.
00:59:11Oh my, oh.
00:59:12What was that?
00:59:13What?
00:59:15Ah, fucking shit.
00:59:17Man, we gotta smoke.
00:59:17Oh, we can smoke in here.
00:59:21Stop.
00:59:22Frank, stop teasing Frank.
00:59:25Oh shit.
00:59:27Sorry, man.
00:59:28We're just looking for a place to finish this road.
00:59:30Oh, I heard something.
00:59:31You wanna join us?
00:59:32Uh, no, I might try.
00:59:34Come on, you gotta do it, come on.
00:59:36Seriously, guys, I need to go.
00:59:38Where's your dog, man?
00:59:39What's it like being blind a bit?
00:59:40It's tripping.
00:59:45Frank?
00:59:47Frank, are we gonna do something soon?
00:59:52Bro, you are too funny.
00:59:56Thanks, man.
00:59:58Ooh, this is some good stuff.
00:59:59I haven't smoked since junior high.
01:00:01Dude, I haven't stopped smoking since junior high.
01:00:04Wait, wait, wait.
01:00:06I feel like I was supposed to be doing something.
01:00:11Damn, I really can't remember.
01:00:12This is some good shit.
01:00:33Oh, no.
01:00:35You're the devil.
01:00:36No more.
01:00:41JJ?
01:00:42I'm...
01:00:42Jeremy?
01:00:43Jeremy, you have to remember that amazing time we had together, don't you?
01:00:47Please.
01:00:49Lex, I can't.
01:00:51I mean, I got a girlfriend.
01:00:54I really like this girl.
01:00:55Fine.
01:00:57It's just so sad, because I'm wearing this...
01:01:01coupless bra, and I also have on crotchless panties,
01:01:05with just a little string of pearl in front for extra stimulation.
01:01:12Oh.
01:01:17We've got like 30 minutes before she gets here.
01:01:19Perfect.
01:01:24Before she gets here.
01:01:26Perfect.
01:01:36Oh, yeah.
01:01:38Do it.
01:01:39Let's do it.
01:01:40Fuck me.
01:01:41Fuck me now.
01:01:47What?
01:01:47What's wrong?
01:01:49I can't...
01:01:50I can't get it in.
01:01:52Try down there.
01:01:54It's like desert down there.
01:01:55It's sandpaper.
01:01:57I just...
01:01:58Okay, I get the picture.
01:02:00Just try it again.
01:02:03No.
01:02:04Why is this happening?
01:02:07We've fooled around before.
01:02:08I...
01:02:09I was dripping wet.
01:02:10I came like four times, remember?
01:02:12Just do what you did then.
01:02:13Come on.
01:02:14I already did my thing.
01:02:15I already tried.
01:02:18What?
01:02:19What is different this time?
01:02:21I don't know.
01:02:24Last time...
01:02:27I honestly don't even know what you're talking about.
01:02:30What?
01:02:32You're not JJ?
01:02:34But your name is Jeremy Jones.
01:02:36How can you not be JJ?
01:02:39Who the hell is this JJ?
01:02:42Where are you going?
01:02:44We're not done here.
01:02:45I can still do this.
01:02:46I just need a little bit of work.
01:02:47What?
01:02:48We can do this.
01:02:49I don't need JJ.
01:02:50I don't need anyone else.
01:02:52We can do this.
01:02:55Go team.
01:02:59What?
01:03:00Just keep going.
01:03:07Shit.
01:03:08Shit.
01:03:18Where's Jeremy?
01:03:21We were just, you know...
01:03:25Hey babe.
01:03:26Just working out.
01:03:31How could you, you bastard?
01:03:37You might wanna...
01:03:39What?
01:03:40What?
01:03:46Mariela!
01:03:48Mariela!
01:03:49You know those aren't mine.
01:03:51At least not all of them.
01:03:54What is wrong with you?
01:04:03You used to be so pure.
01:04:05Well no more.
01:04:07That's it.
01:04:08Really.
01:04:09That's the last one.
01:04:10No.
01:04:13Oops.
01:04:21Oh, man.
01:04:23I'm sorry.
01:04:29I love you.
01:04:29I love you too.
01:04:36I mean, I'm just a lot of fun.
01:04:38I'm sorry.
01:04:39I'm sorry.
01:04:47What is it? What are you doing down here?
01:04:51Waiting for everyone to leave so I can sneak out and get far, far away from here.
01:04:56What?
01:04:56Why? Nothing. Just this blind guy and his dog.
01:05:03Honey, it's gonna be okay.
01:05:05No, it's not okay.
01:05:08Oh, God. And you know whose fault it is?
01:05:11I'm sorry.
01:05:12It's Jake's. Jake's fault. That blind, cheating bastard.
01:05:18Yes. He is such a dickwad. You need to confront him.
01:05:22Yeah. Yeah, I need to confront him.
01:05:25I mean, it's my birthday and where is he anyway?
01:05:28Like, why isn't he hanging out with me?
01:05:30You know, you just call him here and give him a big piece of your mind.
01:05:34Yeah, a big piece. A big old chunk of my mind. A big piece of it.
01:05:39Yeah.
01:05:40You know, you might wanna...
01:05:43You need to look hot while you break up with him.
01:05:45Yeah, you're right.
01:05:48Why am I wearing a sheet?
01:05:49I know.
01:05:51I know.
01:05:56I'm sorry.
01:05:57I'm sorry.
01:06:00I get shy around a beautiful woman like you.
01:06:04I got no game.
01:06:13It's not important.
01:06:28Hey, um...
01:06:28Eric, I can't talk right now.
01:06:30No, no, no. I really need to talk to you.
01:06:33Really, Eric, I can't right now, so...
01:06:35No, no, no, no.
01:06:36I just wanted to say I'm sorry about earlier and I'm just embarrassed and I wanna make it up to
01:06:42you.
01:06:42Eric, really?
01:06:44I don't care. It's fine.
01:06:45No, but I do.
01:06:47I mean, I do. I care.
01:06:49Sure.
01:06:50I haven't known how to tell you.
01:06:53Maybe because, uh, I don't know, I'm a little shy.
01:06:56But I was wondering or hoping that we could go out sometime.
01:07:03Soon.
01:07:04Because I'm gonna be leaving for a little while and it would be nice to go out with like...
01:07:09Really?
01:07:09Eric, you're shy. You have no game.
01:07:13No, not really.
01:07:16Yeah, no, I can't do this. Sorry.
01:07:22Okay. All right.
01:07:25I, uh...
01:07:28Happy birthday, then.
01:07:41Oh, I'm sorry. I was trying to kiss you.
01:07:53Wow.
01:08:06Here I come, baby. Get ready for your big birthday surprise.
01:08:13Oh.
01:08:14Eric, stop. Um, we can't do this.
01:08:17Oh, God, Danny. Not again.
01:08:18Oh, no, um...
01:08:19Honey, happy...
01:08:22What the fuck is this?
01:08:24Who the hell are you, dude?
01:08:26Okay, guys, don't.
01:08:31Cheryl.
01:08:32Cheryl.
01:08:33Baby.
01:08:33What is this?
01:08:36Aw, gee, Cheryl.
01:08:39You're...
01:08:39I've been looking for you all night and you've been...
01:08:42Oh, man, no wonder I couldn't find you.
01:08:45You couldn't find me?
01:08:47What about all those girls' vaginas you were in or your penis getting sucked?
01:08:52Cheryl, honey.
01:08:54No, no.
01:08:54We can work this out.
01:08:56Baby, I love you.
01:08:58Jake, no. You have to go.
01:08:59Baby, I'll be faithful from now on, please.
01:09:01No.
01:09:01I promise.
01:09:02No, Jake. I can't do this. I'm sorry.
01:09:05Cheryl, come on.
01:09:06No.
01:09:07Jake, please. Just go. Just go. I'm sorry.
01:09:10You're a harmless bitch!
01:09:12How can you do...
01:09:14Yay! You did it.
01:09:16I'm so proud of you.
01:09:17You got your revenge sex.
01:09:19You left him a mere shell of a man.
01:09:21Revenge sex?
01:09:24It's really not what it sounds like at all.
01:09:27Right.
01:09:29That all makes sense now.
01:09:32Wow. I feel really stupid.
01:09:36Eric, I'm really... I'm really sorry.
01:09:39Cheryl, I really liked you.
01:09:42And you used me.
01:09:44Eric, please don't go. Please, Eric!
01:09:49Aren't you happy?
01:09:52Well, no. That's not exactly how it's supposed to feel like.
01:09:55You mean the sex? Was it...
01:09:57Yeah?
01:09:58No, we didn't quite do it.
01:10:00Oh.
01:10:01You know, I couldn't seem to do it either.
01:10:04Really?
01:10:04I just never found the right guy.
01:10:06Or guys.
01:10:08Anyway.
01:10:09We better get downstairs.
01:10:10People are starting to leave.
01:10:12I wonder how Sue did.
01:10:26Can't believe she dumped me, man.
01:10:27This is bullshit!
01:10:29God!
01:10:33Dude, suck it!
01:10:36Come out of here!
01:10:38Yeah!
01:10:39He has good hair, though.
01:10:44Don't you fuse on me.
01:10:47And don't fuse in my car, either.
01:11:02Oh, Sue, are you alright?
01:11:06Was it from sex?
01:11:08Did you pop your cork?
01:11:09I don't think so.
01:11:10Not with the guy, anyway.
01:11:13Oh, don't ask.
01:11:13Every possible object.
01:11:16It's like every mechanical thing.
01:11:18It was like...
01:11:20Transformers.
01:11:21They just all became vibrators.
01:11:23I told you.
01:11:25It's indicting.
01:11:28So what about Chris?
01:11:30Well, last time I saw him, he was running away through dear life.
01:11:32I told you he was gay.
01:11:34Well, I think I'm just...
01:11:36Oh, cramp.
01:11:39Oh, I think it's broken.
01:11:42So wait.
01:11:44None of us cashed an RV card.
01:11:51Oh, Joanna, you're so sweet.
01:11:54So let's go grab some food.
01:11:56Wanna go?
01:11:57No.
01:11:59I think I should finish up here.
01:12:02Did you ever find that guy you were looking for?
01:12:04No.
01:12:05Well...
01:12:06I don't know.
01:12:07For some reason I just realized...
01:12:09He needs to be my first.
01:12:12Or something.
01:12:13Why, do you know him?
01:12:15Sort of.
01:12:16Oh.
01:12:17Well, hey, if you happen to run into him, just tell him I'd like to see him again.
01:12:28Love him?
01:12:29Shut it!
01:12:30I don't wanna hear it from you.
01:12:31You wanna get married?
01:12:32You wanna do it?
01:12:33Zip it!
01:12:34I've heard, I've heard, I've heard.
01:12:35Just statist past!
01:12:39Stop.
01:12:59Stop!نا
01:13:03Um, no, no way.
01:13:23Oh well, there's always next year.
01:13:48It's you, I've been waiting for you, J.J.
01:13:57Joanna.
01:13:58I don't know.
01:14:47Oh well, there's always next year.
01:15:04Wow, that's amazing.
01:15:08Yeah, I didn't know I had it in me.
01:15:11I guess something inspired me.
01:15:15You really captured his expression in his eyes.
01:15:19Yeah, even that little callic he has in his hair.
01:15:25Who's?
01:15:25Who's Eric's?
01:15:27That's him, right?
01:15:31Oh.
01:15:33Yeah.
01:15:35I have to go see him.
01:15:41Well, I think you know what we should do.
01:15:54One-nine-hundred confess.
01:15:58Sister Terese?
01:16:00Yeah, hon, there was a problem with your credit card.
01:16:04I just need the last three numbers in the back.
01:16:07Oh, sure.
01:16:10It's 271.
01:16:12Sister, I know this isn't a confession, but can I ask your opinion on something?
01:16:17Do you think if you do something bad that God will forgive you, take you back?
01:16:24Sure, hon.
01:16:25Why not?
01:16:26As long as you're on the right path.
01:16:30Well, how do you know if you're on that path?
01:16:32Sister, I always look for some kind of sign from the universe.
01:16:37Something to let me know that it's all going to be okay.
01:16:42Sister, can I get up now?
01:16:45I really got to pee.
01:16:46No!
01:16:47Hush your trap!
01:16:50Okay, honey, I really need to get back to work, but call back any time.
01:16:55I will.
01:16:57Thanks.
01:17:01Sister?
01:17:02Shut up or I'll punish you hard, you sheep fucker!
01:17:22Eric, wait!
01:17:26Cheryl?
01:17:29Eric, um, look, I am so sorry about everything.
01:17:35I was trying to have revenge sex with you.
01:17:38At the beginning, but then at the end I wasn't.
01:17:42I just didn't want to do that with you.
01:17:45The revenge part, not the sex part.
01:17:48Um, I, I do want to go out with you.
01:17:54And I didn't realize that until this morning.
01:17:58I mean, you're a completely different guy than Jake is, and he's all over these pinker-
01:18:04Come on, I gotta get going.
01:18:07Oh, wow.
01:18:08Um, Cheryl, uh, this is my sister Tina.
01:18:12Tina, Cheryl.
01:18:14Hi, nice to meet you.
01:18:19Uh, so, um, do you mind if I call you in a few days, when I get back?
01:18:26Yeah, sure.
01:18:35Oh, sorry, no kissing, right?
01:18:37No, kissing.
01:18:38Oh.
01:18:39Mmm.
01:18:56Hey, did you ever, uh, get those flowers I sent you?
01:19:02I don't even care that you hooked up with Lexi.
01:19:05Wait, what? I never did that.
01:19:08I mean, you don't have to lie about it.
01:19:10She told me all about your pierced tongue.
01:19:18She must have me mixed up with someone else.
01:19:21I wonder who it was.
01:19:43At least this birthday's over.
01:19:58Dear Lord, please forgive me.
01:20:02I mean, if you could just, I don't know, like, send me a sign.
01:20:09I don't know.
01:20:40Excuse me, excuse me.
01:20:42Do you know where the church is?
01:20:44It's on Bountain Street.
01:20:46Um, yeah, that's the church I go to.
01:20:49Or used to go to.
01:20:50Um, it's straight up that way and then left.
01:20:57You're more than welcome to come with me if you like.
01:20:59Oh, um, I don't know.
01:21:09Well, that's pretty powerful.
01:21:13Oh, 250 horsepower, 225 pounds of torque.
01:21:18Like I said, you're more than welcome to hop on.
01:21:23I don't think so.
01:21:24But thanks.
01:21:26What's your name?
01:21:27Sue.
01:21:28What's yours?
01:21:30Jesus.
01:21:30Really?
01:21:33Tea.
01:21:36Maybe I could use the ride.
01:21:49Bye.
01:21:50Bye.
01:21:53Bye.
01:21:55Bye.
01:21:57Bye.
01:21:59Bye.
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