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Boyzone No Matter What S01E03 (2025) [Full Movie] [Hot 2026]Full EP - Full
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00:14You're living in a bubble, you're living in a dream.
00:19I was 18 when we started, catapulted into this superstardom.
00:24Look at us now! Look at us now!
00:27Because I loved what we did for seven years, and now it was being taken from me.
00:32Do boyzones still exist? I don't know.
00:35The world we just lived has disappeared. What is my new world? Who the fuck am I?
00:42Although nothing has been confirmed officially, it's thought Gatelyn...
00:45Everything had changed. Everything had changed.
00:48I should have gone back. I know that I should have gone back.
00:53To get those years would have been everything.
01:16TOGETHER
01:17Boyzone is over forever, by Paul Martin.
01:21And yeah, fucking hell.
01:24Just reading what he told me, I mean, that is just,
01:27this really sums up how pissed off Shane was with Ronan.
01:33Honestly, all you had to do was talk to me
01:36about how you feel about Ronan and off he went.
01:39I was angry at Ro for years
01:41and I found myself in this dark world.
01:45It didn't take a lot to upset me
01:47and it would come out in any environment,
01:50any space, live TV, to concerts, to interviews.
01:54Do you get upset that they keep saying nasty things about you?
01:57No, you know what? So be it.
02:00We're all getting on with our lives.
02:02Floyd's own, I don't think, are going to get back together pretty much
02:04and if the guys want to get back together,
02:06you know, wish them the best, I hope they do well.
02:08We had decided to take a year off
02:11and then get back together.
02:14But one year later, I couldn't see it happening.
02:17OK, I'm going to be involved.
02:19A bad lemon. Oh, a ball's lemon.
02:21A ball.
02:25What did you all take before you came?
02:29I was getting plenty of work
02:30but it just wasn't fulfilling my dreams, I suppose, my goals.
02:37I really wanted to perform.
02:38I had to get out. I had to find something.
02:40I had to find something that gave me a bit of hope in life.
02:49Growing up, cars are with my life.
02:52My dad working as a car mechanic, me lying under any car, under any bonnet, it's who I am.
03:02I was blessed with an opportunity to drive in a show called Autosport Show.
03:07The best in the world, the best in the world were there, and this dickhead.
03:14I came toward in that race, and from there, I got signed to Ford Motorsport.
03:20When you stand on stage, that energy that you got, I got that from cars.
03:26In Boyzone, I lacked purpose in my own mind.
03:30All of a sudden now, shit, this is your time to shine.
03:46Out of the blue, I got a phone call from Coronation Street.
03:51Out of my comfort zone, to say the least, but nevertheless, I gave it my best shot.
03:57I went into Corrie for two or three episodes.
03:59I ended up staying on and off for ten years.
04:03Coronation Street gave me an identity, it gave me belief in myself, it gave me confidence.
04:08All of a sudden, I was somebody.
04:10That was Keith Duffy, it wasn't the big one in the back with the broken teeth.
04:14Now, did you watch your pal?
04:16Keith, yeah, I did, yeah.
04:18I thought it was fantastic.
04:19And do you all still keep in touch?
04:21I haven't spoke to Ronan in a while, or Mikey.
04:23Just that you're all so busy, you know, doing your own thing, you know, it's quite hard.
04:28I'd always make time for boys on.
04:31After my solo album, it was very, very difficult, more difficult than I thought it was going to be.
04:37You know, quit for about a year, came back and done some theatre.
04:42I loved doing that, but I just felt it really difficult being on my own.
04:47And, you know, being with four guys who you consider your brothers, and then just kind of not seeing them
04:53for a long time.
04:55None compares to being with the lads.
05:07It was unbelievable there in the noughties.
05:09Madness.
05:12My manager, Louis, at the time is saying, record company are pushing you, you've got to make the album, you
05:17know, we need the album made.
05:19I was very hungry, and I wanted to be great, and I wanted to have my opportunities, so I kept
05:23going.
05:25But it was quantity over quality.
05:29I'd loads of ideas for him.
05:31As a big, middle-of-the-road artist, he appeals to older women and stuff.
05:36And there's nobody better.
05:38That was his market, that was his lane.
05:40It just, he, he, he just got it wrong.
05:43He just made the wrong choices.
05:47He didn't even know where the fuck I was.
05:49I opened in Sydney to 10,000 people.
05:51He didn't know I was on tour.
05:54Get ready for another TV phenomenon.
05:56Pop stars The Rivals is coming in autumn.
05:59Well, it's good, it's good.
06:00We are going to get good singers at the end of the day.
06:03Louis became a TV personality.
06:06He was given that chance, because he was the manager of Boyzone.
06:09And that obviously gave Louis an opportunity, but that took a lot of his time.
06:14I was on the phone to Ronin all the time.
06:17I talked to him every day, and he always wanted more.
06:21Things start to fall into place, and you realize.
06:25Louis's not a great manager.
06:27I gave him multiple opportunities to fix the problems.
06:31So I went and met him, and I said it to his face.
06:34He just said he didn't want to be a karaoke artist,
06:36and he wanted to record his own songs,
06:39he wanted to write his own songs,
06:40and he wanted to be a proper artist.
06:42I've got one shot in my career,
06:45and he didn't give a fuck.
06:46That shocked me,
06:48the fact that he wasn't happy with the songs.
06:51They were all hits.
06:52Hey, that's what you're in the business for,
06:55having hits.
06:56It just fell on deaf ears.
06:58I always told him the truth.
07:00What was the truth?
07:02You're a lucky fucker.
07:03You know, this is great, enjoy it.
07:06And I remember going in and saying,
07:08right, that's it.
07:10And what did you say?
07:11I said, OK.
07:13Nothing I could have done.
07:14I couldn't have changed his mind.
07:15It was a divorce.
07:20Battle lines are drawn, and you did have to pick a side.
07:23I picked Louis.
07:25I knew Westlife was going to be bigger than Boyzone.
07:27It was in my own selfish interest.
07:29But you had to pick somebody,
07:30and Louis made that very clear.
07:34It's this monumental shift in the media.
07:37Just the language in the newspapers changed,
07:40and he was demeaned and diminished.
07:43I called him talentless
07:45and different things here and there in the press.
07:48He knew how to hurt me.
07:50Vicious fucking bitchy, vicious, horrible things.
07:55He tried to ruin me and my career.
08:00Do I regret it?
08:01Yeah, a little bit.
08:03Do you think he knows that you regret it?
08:04No, he doesn't know.
08:07It was an incredible show of the strength
08:11of somebody who has the media that they think of it.
08:13You are who you are because I made you who you are.
08:19I was with Ronan all the time, you know.
08:22I was there working with him every day,
08:25so it was just inevitable that I would just take over eventually.
08:31Mark Plunkett, thank God for Mark.
08:33I kept my sanity because of Mark.
08:36We had a great time, lots of touring,
08:39lots of international trips,
08:42lots of TVs all over the world.
08:44You're mad busy because you're promoting your new album.
08:48But the singles out now, this is it.
08:50But there's inevitably going to come a point
08:51where the sales dip slightly.
08:53You know, the hits weren't quite as big as they'd been.
09:00I made my third album, my fourth,
09:03and things started to slow down a little bit.
09:07He wasn't having hits.
09:11But he's not having any since I left.
09:14Oh.
09:15I had done my party trick
09:18and maybe had done it a few more times too much.
09:21And I needed to figure out again who I was,
09:25you know, where I was.
09:26So my compass kind of went back to north.
09:32To the boys.
09:412006, Gary Barlow was putting Take That back together.
09:47So I went along to see the show.
09:51All the fans noticed me
09:53and the whole place started chanting my name and clapping
09:57and I was like,
09:58I thought I had been completely forgotten about.
10:02So that was quite a surprise.
10:08And then when I seen their show,
10:11I was kind of feeling the bug again, you know?
10:18We just slowly but surely got to chat again to each other
10:22and little kind of whispers here and there.
10:24You know, Stephen would definitely be the one
10:26that would be pushing it with them.
10:27This is going to be great.
10:28You know, we have to do this.
10:29And just all spiralled into kind of us having a meeting.
10:32Let's get into a room.
10:34That was all.
10:35That's all.
10:35It was test the water.
10:40I was worried about the boys' reaction.
10:44I hadn't seen them for years.
10:46There was resentment.
10:48Bitterness.
10:51I was shitting myself going into the room.
10:53Yeah, 100%.
10:53I was nervous as hell.
11:09You know, you could feel there was a lot of scars.
11:12People were unsure, unsure it was going to work.
11:16Unsure they wanted to do it at all.
11:19The rage that I had with Ro.
11:21In my mind, when I saw I was going to fucking destroy him.
11:25I was going to abort him.
11:28Very, very, very spiky.
11:30That first moment, walking into the room again.
11:34I was fuming.
11:35And when I saw his face,
11:37I could do nothing but hug the fella.
11:39Oh, I'm staying.
11:40Oh, I'm staying.
11:40What's happening, Ed?
11:41What's happening?
11:42I was going, dude, like, I miss you.
11:45That actually gave me a good insight to
11:48it's not always as bad as you think in your mind.
11:52I would just like to apologise
11:54if anything I have said or done in the past seven years
11:56has hurt or affected anybody in a negative or unhappy fashion.
12:02I wasn't the reason the band broke up,
12:03but I was definitely the reason the band didn't get back together
12:05before now, and I apologise for that.
12:08I made choices that I'm not proud of.
12:11I left them behind
12:14for success.
12:18I did have blinkers on.
12:20Yeah.
12:21Didn't end right.
12:22We need to do it right.
12:26Asking if he thought there was any scope for the band getting back together.
12:29Things haven't always been as good as they are tonight.
12:32It was great going in so successful as an actor, but every now and again you'd get a surge
12:37of memories, the audience being blown away.
12:42And you'd go, wow, I'd love just one more chance.
12:46Maybe this could work now if we're all really on the same page.
12:50You know, it was there for the taking.
12:53Personally, you know what I mean?
12:55I'd like to do a little something.
12:56I really fucking missed all of you.
12:59I mean, I think it's just amazing being here.
13:00I mean, it's bad.
13:02It excited me, you know?
13:05I think everyone was kind of, let's do it.
13:08Let's do a tour.
13:09Let's get to see if people are bothered with Boys Zone anymore.
13:29Who's idea were those fucking outfits?
13:40Oh, my God.
13:43Our first performance in eight years, we're climbing underneath the stage to go on these
13:49trapdoors to be sprung loaded onto stage.
13:54So nervous going up in that lift and kind of going, oh, my God, I don't know where I'm
13:58going.
13:58It's like you're rubbing the headlights.
14:00You get a panic attack.
14:02You get this kind of, oh, shit, and it's amazing.
14:11I remember that excitement, how we felt in that exact moment with that countdown.
14:17You can feel the breath.
14:19You can feel the energy from a crowd.
14:21And you cannot imagine what that's like.
14:23It's unreal.
14:34Oh, man, that gives you goosebumps.
14:48I couldn't hear the first two songs, to be honest, because the crowd was so loud.
14:54I'm not there for glory.
14:56I'm there to go, look at all you people and look at the joy that we can bring you.
15:12We designed a moment, everybody would get their own little moment.
15:15And I think that's why it felt so different.
15:19I felt a part of the band for the first time.
15:27That my efforts were being appreciated, that we could now really be a band.
15:37We'd fill each other's spaces without even thinking about it, without even looking at
15:41each other.
15:42If Shane was out far right, you know, I'd see him starting to move in.
15:46If Mikey was in the middle, he'd move over to fill my space and you'd just fill each other's
15:51voids.
15:52And it's a real art.
15:57We're back.
15:58We were back.
16:00I just felt, you know, unbelievable.
16:03That was pretty magic then, getting the band back together.
16:12That reunion tour was huge, you know, multiple nights in arenas.
16:17Then when they got back together, they asked me to take over the managing.
16:20I was glad to be involved.
16:22I've been there since day one in the UK.
16:26And, you know, I didn't want anyone else to carry on writing those chapters.
16:30See, we're the vocal harmony group we are.
16:33We're now a boy band, right?
16:34The plan was then to, you know, work on a new album.
16:37Everyone was in a great place.
16:41We, as a collective now, had more control over the music.
16:45For the first time, I was enjoying the music that Boyzone was doing.
16:50Took us 15 years to do that.
16:5507 to 09 were the best years of the band.
16:58We were the most comfortable in our own skin that we'd ever been.
17:02As soon as I get in a room with them boys, I'm the silliest fella I was back when I
17:05was
17:0617 years old.
17:07It's just kindergarten kids.
17:08It was absolutely brilliant to be back with those fellas.
17:12Like nothing had changed.
17:14Like nothing had changed.
17:16Too far.
17:16Please.
17:17Too far.
17:19Just seemed to share even more laughs than we had before.
17:24I don't know.
17:25Just a better understanding of each other.
17:27You've got to get this right.
17:28Come on, come on.
17:29Some people really came into their own.
17:31Steven in particular.
17:33Hey, all of you.
17:34Go.
17:35It was the best version of him I'd ever seen.
17:37The other guys have got girls to dance with.
17:39You've got a bloke.
17:40Yeah.
17:41I don't have to be true to myself and that's how it turned out.
17:43I think it works beautifully with the song.
17:46He was looking great.
17:48He had a book going.
17:49He had met someone new.
17:51Andy.
17:52They were just in love and got married.
17:56Very happy.
17:57Everything was going as planned.
17:59Presumably you're going to be working on new music together.
18:01Four singles, a brand new song.
18:02And you have it already?
18:04Yeah.
18:04Why would we think so?
18:05We had done the better tour.
18:06We had new songs for a new album.
18:08And that brother album is our finest hour.
18:11Everybody was really, really happy and in a good place.
18:14It's a blessing.
18:15Be given a second chance.
18:17And I'm loving every minute of it.
18:31My phone rang.
18:34It was a solicitor by the name of Gerald Keane,
18:37who Boyzone had used in the 90s.
18:39The phone rang.
18:41Picked it up.
18:43And Gerald Keane says to me,
18:49I'm sorry to tell you,
18:55but Stephen has passed away.
18:59And I said, Stephen who?
19:07He said, Stephen Gately.
19:10The Boyzone singer Stephen Gately has died while on holiday on the Spanish island of Mallorca at the age of
19:1633.
19:22I had to call Louie and the guys and give them the news.
19:31It was late.
19:33We were in the bar, we were drinking.
19:34And as I left the crowd, Ro's voice came louder in my phone.
19:40He's like, Steele, Steele, he's gone.
19:42I said, what, our Stephen?
19:45He said, yeah.
19:46He said, he's gone.
19:48It just wouldn't go in.
19:51What?
19:51What?
19:51No, no, no, not our Stephen.
19:53And I hear him screaming.
19:56For your heart.
19:57You still hear it.
20:03Can't breathe.
20:05Your legs got from under you.
20:08It would get through in little bits.
20:11And then it would be complete just breakdown.
20:14Steele.
20:18My wall just fell apart.
20:24Numb.
20:31We tried to put a plan together to get down to Steele.
20:36Our instinct was just to get together.
20:38So that force of companionship and that force of like, okay, where are you?
20:44How can I get to you?
20:45What do you need?
20:46I couldn't tell you the journey.
20:48Couldn't tell you anything.
20:49I just know we got on a fucking plane.
21:00The body of Stephen Gately was found by police officers.
21:02So far, Gately's family have made no comments.
21:03What caused Stephen Gately's death on Saturday remains unexplained.
21:08Miriam got me on a flight to Mallorca the next morning.
21:12I get out there and it is heaving.
21:18There was press everywhere.
21:20It was crazy having the boys there.
21:22They just couldn't move.
21:23It was horrible.
21:24It was horrible.
21:26The kind of cesspit of journalism that sometimes it can all descend into.
21:31Paul, what can you tell us?
21:32What's the latest?
21:33Well, Karen, there's been quite a lot of movement here at the apartment.
21:35This is the apartment just beyond me here,
21:37where Stephen actually passed away.
21:39Suddenly, it's immediately like, get the story.
21:45What has happened?
21:46What has happened?
21:48Nobody really speaking in the Boys Zone camp officially yet.
21:52But obviously, there's quite a lot of speculation behind the scenes.
21:55So then you're starting to get around the hotels.
21:57And what clubs was he in?
21:58You're trying to put this together.
21:59He was found by police and taken here to one of the island's mortuaries.
22:03Although nothing has been confirmed officially, it's thought Gately and his partner arrived back here.
22:08You know, we had no idea what happened to him.
22:10You know, it's only what we've read and, you know, in the press and stuff.
22:15Conspiracy theories are running wild.
22:17All the reporters, they're exchanging stories.
22:19Well, I heard this and I heard that.
22:21Lots of innuendo, lots of chatter about the circumstances around his death.
22:25Some of the rubbish that was written was just horrible.
22:28The worst for me was, they were saying, it must have been drugs.
22:33I was, like, screaming inside because, like, I knew, like, there was absolutely no way.
22:40It was quite incredible, the most, the ridiculous articles that were written.
22:45There was one in particular.
22:47Stephen's sexuality had led to his death.
22:50If he's gay, it must mean that he's got this incredibly, you know, outrageous hidden lifestyle.
23:00Oh, he'd been out on a bender and overdosed on drugs.
23:04We were hearing everything.
23:07I've known Stephen for over a decade.
23:11He was the last man to, you know, have a hedonistic lifestyle or a dangerous lifestyle.
23:17It's the first time I've ever looked at my own industry, my own world, what I'd been part of, and
23:21gone, you scumbags.
23:23My mother found two men at the end of her bed taking pictures of my parents as they woke.
23:33Basically broke into our house and went up the stairs and took pictures.
23:40With everything that was happening, I was just waiting for the autopsy report to confirm that it was something else.
23:47Because I knew it was something else.
23:52Pathologists here have concluded that he did not die as a result of alcohol nor drugs.
23:58He had a heart defect that nobody knew about.
24:02Because of the heart defect, his lungs filled with fluid.
24:08We found out I have the same heart condition Stephen has.
24:13Funny how just, you know, a little tablet every day just sort of keeps that under control and Stephen only
24:19knew.
24:20People didn't bother their arses to really read up on what happened.
24:25They just see the headlines in the newspapers and they just assume that he's overdosed.
24:31Oh, you were in that band with that dead guy.
24:34Did he kill himself?
24:35I've gone from not to ten in a second at times.
24:39You want to insult my brother, I'll fucking kill you, you know.
24:42I don't care how big or strong you are.
24:44You'd have to kill me to stop me.
24:47But to hear that they were now putting, like, a name, you know, to what he died from makes it
24:53a little bit easier just because it was just like you could breathe again, you know.
25:09We brought Stephen home.
25:13Margaret Stephen's mum asked us to look after the funeral arrangements.
25:22We didn't like the idea of him being alone in the church overnight.
25:28He didn't like the cold. He didn't like being alone.
25:32So we offered to stay the night with him in the church to keep him company.
25:42When everybody else left and there was just the five of us, there was a great sense of peace, of
25:52unity.
25:59I don't want to say sadness because, believe it or not, we actually had quite a comedic night.
26:08And the usual joking that used to go on in the very early days when everything was innocent and naive,
26:22for that night, that emerged.
26:27We put easels all around the church of pictures of Stephen.
26:31And we walked around looking at the different pictures, the different smiles, the energy in his face, and we talked
26:37to him.
26:38We knew what his part would be. We all knew it. We didn't have to say it. We could feel
26:42his voice and his energy.
26:44And we joked and we laughed and we talked about old stories.
26:48And what a thing to share with those boys and with Steele, those very last moments.
26:54We still had him, you know, in some way. We still had him.
26:58Just the five of us together.
27:00And you hold on as long as you can.
27:05Yeah, but the morning came around real fast.
27:16We had a mass, a special mass, prepared for Stephen.
27:20It was really only family and the lads and friends, close friends.
27:23And when we turned up the church, there was people lined for miles and miles.
27:33There was an ocean of photographers as well, flashing away as we were going in.
27:40So, erm, I went over to the photographers and I said, you're welcome to come in.
27:44I said, everybody can come in.
27:46And they all, like, sort of stepped up to come in.
27:48And I said, you can leave your cameras there.
27:50And then you can come in and pay your respects.
27:54You know?
27:54Cos he didn't pay your respects to him when he was alive.
27:58You know?
28:00None of them came in. Yeah.
28:06We can only have so many in here in the church and I know we have so many, many people
28:10outside.
28:10So just thanks to you for coming along to share in this special day to remember Stephen.
28:17Stephen was a force to be reckoned with.
28:20A true friend full of love and friendship.
28:24He brought colour to the band and that band now simply feels black and white without him.
28:30We're gonna really miss you, brother.
28:32We love you.
28:34We always will.
28:43Carrying his coffin with the other guys.
28:47You could have heard a pain drop.
28:53And this is on a street that was the toughest part to grow up in Dublin.
29:00And the height of respect that the people showed for this boy from their neighbourhood.
29:09It broke me.
29:15The love he had was fucking gorgeous to witness.
29:20It's a rare thing.
29:21Everybody loved him.
29:24He was a true pop star.
29:26He loved life.
29:28You know, he paved the way for so many to know it was okay.
29:32I mean, I hope that's not a legacy, what is?
29:37When I think of Stephen, all I can see is him being like four years of age with his little
29:46t-shirt on with Miss Piggy on the front of it.
29:49He was very innocent and shy and just looking up, wanting to give you his hand for you to just
29:56take him.
29:57Just so lovable and kind and, you know, just a lovely person.
30:16It felt better to be in each other's company than not to be.
30:33We decided that maybe, you know, the right thing to do in Stephen's memory is to keep going.
30:42Shouldn't have.
30:44The dynamic changed what it felt like to be in the band.
30:49Sometimes it was hard just to do the gig.
30:52The three fellas and one missing.
30:56The void was massive.
30:58And it made you feel so self-conscious.
31:00It made you feel like we were shit.
31:02It made you feel that the audience just wasn't buying us anymore, you know.
31:10We went on and off over the years that followed.
31:14Ten years.
31:16Couple of tours.
31:19Never felt the same.
31:21For me, it wasn't until he was gone that I realized how much he was the glue that kept a
31:27lot of the band together.
31:31Whilst Boison was still being successful, still selling a lot of tickets, still touring all over the world.
31:37To me, it felt as if it was time to take a break.
31:41But rather than splitting up and falling out, announce the farewell tour.
31:48I'm not saying anything's flagging anything, but I'm just staying up.
31:53It got more and more intense.
31:56And relationships broke down within the band.
32:01I spotted arrogance.
32:03The growth of ego.
32:07It just became hard work.
32:09Left, left, left, left, left, left, left, left.
32:11People started just behaving fucking badly.
32:17And when that happens, something's gonna give.
32:22It came to a head in 2019.
32:28I saw it all. I was ready to get the fuck out of there.
32:33It's when the band imploded.
32:40I'm always ready for it.
32:42You know what I mean?
32:542019 was a tough tour. We went everywhere.
33:00I got a sense that towards the end, people were just holding on tight, enjoying the ride, having fun.
33:08When I can't.
33:12I can't, I can't. I've got to sing every day.
33:14I've got to last two hours on stage and, you know, I've got to be able to perform.
33:17And in Tokyo, I just felt the piss was being taken.
33:27If you're coming tonight, have a great time, because we certainly are going to have a fantastic time.
33:32See you later.
33:33I always found going on stage a bit of a party anyway.
33:37It's everyone out there is having a great time.
33:39I needed a great time too.
33:40I mean, they had been out all day and they were drinking all day and, yeah, it was messy.
33:50We certainly partied a little harder than we usually did.
34:03It was the end of the road.
34:08I think that they interpreted me as seeing their carry-on as infantile.
34:18And that is how I see it.
34:22I'm sure if you talk to any one of the fans at any one of those shows, they'll tell you
34:26that they had the best night of their lives.
34:28It was the worst.
34:30It was the worst I had seen in all of our years.
34:38So I went at the mall, told them how I felt.
34:41It was a tennis match.
34:43From that guy, to that guy, to that guy.
34:45You're not pulling your weight like I'm pulling my weight.
34:48The job was always done, you know.
34:50He done a great job.
34:51And we did our job the way we did.
34:54You know, I gave it all.
34:56At my detriment.
34:58I gave everything.
34:59To be the lead man, you take on most of the work.
35:02Don't complain about us who aren't working as hard.
35:06We don't have the opportunity.
35:07It's very different.
35:09You were the dude who wanted to be in the front.
35:11So, take your fucking role and do it.
35:14It had reached a complete stage of malignancy.
35:21I had enough.
35:23The next night, there was a clash between Keith and Mikey in the dressing room.
35:27There were things that happened that were cruel.
35:33And I'm not going to express any more than that.
35:37My mother always said, if you haven't got anything nice to say, don't say anything at all.
35:42We left Japan.
35:45Some of us not talking with each other.
35:49And yet we still had to do the final five nights in the Palladium.
36:04All the venues we played, however big the venue might have been, we always shared a dressing room.
36:10Always shared a dressing room.
36:12And when we turned up at the Palladium, our names are on different doors.
36:19We lasted 25 years flying on the same plane, in the same cars, in the same room.
36:26And the final five shows that we were ever going to do, we were going to do it on our
36:31own.
36:35We went through the motions, got through the five shows.
36:38A very, very big anti-climax.
36:40There was no Holla Ballou.
36:42There was no group hug.
36:44There was no...
36:46Well done.
36:46There was no one from the record company walking on stage with a ten times platinum disc and saying thanks
36:52for everything.
36:54I just wanted to get out of there.
36:58Get away from that toxic environment.
37:03The realisation came that this is the end of the road.
37:07It's over.
37:21I haven't seen anybody since that night.
37:29That's when I began to understand, I need to make some changes, you know.
37:42I've spent the last ten years saying yes, looking after everyone else, making sure everyone else is alright.
37:48But only now am I saying no.
37:50No, I've got to think of me.
37:54So that I can be here to watch my children grow up.
38:00For me personally, I wouldn't be able to survive in that world anymore.
38:04I had to get out.
38:05And I cannot do that to my family.
38:08Go back in there.
38:12It's an addictive drug.
38:15Because I took a back seat for such a long time over my career, I feel that I still have
38:21so much left to prove to myself.
38:25It's a real head fuck.
38:28We've all moved on.
38:30I've got Westlife.
38:31You know, I've had a great career in music.
38:34So I'm happy.
38:37I wouldn't have changed anything.
38:40It wasn't perfect, but it was perfect for me.
38:44Am I done?
38:47I'm going to go.
38:48I'm going to run.
38:49I'm going to go.
38:53I'm going to run.
38:54The music and the stage and the lights.
38:57I can leave that behind.
39:00But the friendship, I think, is what it is more than anything else.
39:07As much as we had had enough of being around each other.
39:11Hello, hello.
39:12Yay, boys.
39:14I couldn't bear to lose any of the boys.
39:16I hope you haven't been here too long.
39:18All fucking morning.
39:19All morning.
39:19I could put his glasses on.
39:21Too close.
39:21Too close.
39:24How are you?
39:25Good to see you.
39:25You look like Jane, Elson John.
39:27Oh, man, that's mad.
39:28You're blind as a bat.
39:29I have a lot of anxiety and I feel a lot of the pain.
39:34Stuff that we've all gone through.
39:37But put me together with them and that doesn't exist.
39:39Looking well as always.
39:40You too.
39:41Lovely.
39:42Where did you get it?
39:46Kindergarten kids.
39:50As soon as they walk in the room, it's like we've never left.
39:53No, no, here we go, here we go, here we go.
39:54Here we go.
39:55My head's better than yours.
39:56I'm keeping it.
39:56Cheers, lads.
39:57Cheers.
39:57Cheers.
39:58It's like we're frozen in time.
40:07I wish them the absolute best in their lives.
40:10I wish them nothing but happiness.
40:12I hold no grudges, no animosity.
40:16Nothing.
40:18However,
40:21I don't want to go back
40:26to how I felt for many years.
40:30And to see them, if it were for too long, would remind me of that.
40:38And my future is far too important to me to waste it, looking back at my past.
40:49But I wish everybody well.
40:53For me, one of the biggest regrets is that I clashed a lot with Mikey.
40:59Yeah.
40:59And me and him were very, very alike.
41:01The amount of time that we didn't get on, that took its toll on me as a human being.
41:07You know what I mean?
41:07It's really sad.
41:08The time wasted, yeah.
41:09But you can't get those years back.
41:11It didn't have to be that way.
41:14If we all had have had better skills at understanding each other better.
41:23We're boys.
41:24And we're men.
41:25And we don't talk like that.
41:27It was never in me to go,
41:29Oh lads, I don't feel great today.
41:31It doesn't exist in a man's world.
41:33I wish it had.
41:35I have parked all of that emotion.
41:37But we were kids, Ro.
41:38We were kids.
41:39I was incredibly insecure.
41:41And Ro, I think we all were.
41:43You know what I mean?
41:43Like that's, they were fundamental years of, you know, growth.
41:47Multimental.
41:48Mental.
41:49Fun, fun, fundamental.
41:53There's nothing more therapeutic than reminiscing about the best times of your life.
41:59It reminds you of how lucky you have been.
42:02The RDS show, the first biggest show back in the RDS.
42:05I'm looking back at that, you know, the song that I used to do when I pulled my trousers off.
42:08It's hard to fucking fathom.
42:10Do you know what I mean?
42:10Can you remember the times with Steele?
42:12Fucking catapult.
42:13Yeah, I know.
42:14Slingshot back to the fucking 90s.
42:15I remember being in Kuala Lumpur and I didn't know if that was South America.
42:19You and I, with our ghetto blast, are listening to Bleedin' Enya.
42:22You know, in 94, 95.
42:23Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
42:24Don't tell any hip-hop, man.
42:25Hip-hop.
42:31I am so grateful for all that I have endured and experienced, good and bad, because it's
42:39brought me to be the man I am today.
42:45Every single day I have something to do with music.
42:49Waking up with a spring in my step.
42:54The guy before I joined Boys Zone was slim, healthy, fit, full of vitality, full of confidence, full of passion.
43:07That's the guy that's returning.
43:13There's a great sense of liberation.
43:19Ready?
43:20Lovely Ireland.
43:21Now spinnies.
43:24I think we'll always be what we always are.
43:29And that's brothers in arms.
43:32Cheating!
43:33Cheating!
43:34Boys who grew up on the fucking north side of Dublin that got catapulted around the world.
43:40Yep!
43:41There could have been, you know, a million other lads in Ireland that got in that band.
43:47But I don't think they would have been as fucked up as the five of us were.
43:52And that's what made us brilliant.
43:56When you think about it, starting off playing in front of 25 people on the back of a truck
44:01to playing to 100,000 people in Hyde Park.
44:05How amazing was that?
44:07It's a hell of a ride.
44:09Success.
44:11And all of the good times really do outweigh all the bad times.
44:18These boys are my boys and I will love them forever in a day.
44:24And when we're together, Stephen Gately is alive again.
44:27And that's what's the most special part.
44:31We did have a great laugh.
44:35And it's like looking back at a picture.
44:39I'm saying, God, this is amazing.
44:46That's our story. It was a good one.
44:52If they came to you and asked you, should we get back together and do a reunion show, what would
44:55you say?
44:59Well, well, that's a question.
45:04Look, I'll be lying to you if I said there isn't a spark of excitement in my mind.
45:10People as far as the eye can see and the roar of the crowd.
45:13That?
45:15That?
45:15Yeah, I would love to experience that again.
45:18Who wouldn't?
45:20But there's so much more going on backstage.
45:24So perhaps I'll leave well enough alone.
45:28Or maybe.
45:31I know I said I'll never go on tour again.
45:33But they said they're going on tour.
45:34I'm not getting left behind.
45:35You're mad.
45:36Who knows?
45:39I know.
45:47I know.
45:54I know.
45:59But you're wrong.
46:03I can't do that.
46:04I know.
46:08Transcription by CastingWords
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