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Boyzone No Matter What S01E03 (2025) [Full Movie] [Full Episodes]Full EP - Full
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00:14You're living in a bubble, you're living in a dream.
00:19I was 18 when we started, catapulted into this superstardom.
00:24Look at us now! Look at us now!
00:27Because I loved what we did for seven years, and now it was being taken from me.
00:32Do boyzones still exist? I don't know.
00:35The world we just lived has disappeared. What is my new world? Who the fuck am I?
00:42Although nothing has been confirmed officially, it's thought Gatelyn...
00:45Everything had changed. Everything had changed.
00:48I should have gone back. I know that I should have gone back.
00:53To get those years would have been everything.
01:15» PLAY ZONE«
01:17Boy Zone is over forever by Paul Martin. Yeah fucking hell.
01:24just reading what he told me
01:25I mean that is just
01:27this really sums up
01:29how pissed off Shane was
01:31with Ronan
01:33honestly all you had to do was
01:35talk to me about how you feel about Ronan
01:37and off he went
01:39I was angry at Ro for years
01:41and I found myself in this
01:43dark world
01:45it didn't take a lot to upset me
01:47and it would come out in any environment
01:49any space
01:51live TV
01:52to concerts
01:53to interviews
01:54do you get upset
01:55that they keep saying nasty things about you
01:57no you know what
01:59so be it
02:00we're all getting on with our lives
02:01Chloe's own
02:02I don't think they're going to get back together
02:03pretty much
02:04and if the guys want to get back together
02:06you know wish them the best
02:07I hope they do well
02:08we had decided
02:09to take a year off
02:11and then get back together
02:14but one year later
02:15I couldn't see it happening
02:19a bad lemon
02:20oh a bald lemon
02:24what did you all take before you came
02:26I was getting plenty of work
02:30but it just wasn't fulfilling my
02:34my dreams I suppose
02:36my goals
02:36I really wanted to perform
02:38I had to get out
02:39I had to find something
02:40I had to find something that
02:41gave me
02:43a bit of hope in life
02:49growing up
02:50cars are with my life
02:52my dad
02:53working as a car mechanic
02:55me
02:56lying under any car
02:57under any bonnet
02:59it's who I am
03:02I was blessed with an opportunity
03:03to drive
03:04in a show called
03:05Autosport Show
03:07the best in the world
03:09were there
03:10and this dickhead
03:14I came toward in that race
03:16and from there
03:17I got signed
03:17to Ford Motorsport
03:20when you stand on stage
03:21that energy that you got
03:23I got that from cars
03:26in boys owner
03:27I lacked purpose
03:28in my own mind
03:30all of a sudden now
03:31shit this is your time to shine
03:39here she is
03:39my one and only
03:41Shelly Unwin
03:41this is my mate
03:42Claire McCarthy
03:43Shelly
03:44good to meet you
03:45yeah as well
03:46out of the blue
03:47I got a phone call
03:48from Coronation Street
03:51out of my comfort zone
03:52to say the least
03:53but nevertheless
03:53I gave it my best shot
03:57I went into Corrie
03:58for two or three episodes
03:59I ended up staying
04:00on and off
04:01for ten years
04:01it gave me an identity
04:05it gave me belief
04:06in myself
04:06it gave me confidence
04:08all of a sudden
04:09I was somebody
04:10that was Keith Duffy
04:11it wasn't the big one
04:12in the back
04:13with the broken teeth
04:14now did you watch
04:15your pal?
04:16Keith yeah I did
04:17yeah
04:17I thought it was fantastic
04:19and do you all
04:20still keep in touch?
04:21I haven't spoke to Ron
04:22in a while
04:22or Mikey
04:23just that you're all
04:24so busy
04:25doing your own thing
04:26it's quite hard
04:28I'd always make time
04:29for boys on
04:31after my solo album
04:32it was very very difficult
04:34more difficult
04:35than I thought
04:36it was going to be
04:37you know
04:38quit for about a year
04:39came back
04:40and done some theatre
04:42I loved doing that
04:43but I just felt
04:45it really difficult
04:45being on my own
04:47and you know
04:48being with four guys
04:49who you consider
04:50your brothers
04:51and then just kind of
04:52not seeing them
04:53for a long time
04:55none compares to
04:56being with the lads
05:06it was unbelievable
05:08in the noughties
05:09madness
05:11my manager Louis
05:13at the time
05:13is saying
05:13record company
05:14are pushing you
05:15you've got to
05:16make the album
05:16we need the album
05:18made
05:19I was very hungry
05:20and I wanted to be great
05:21and I wanted to have
05:22my opportunity
05:23so I kept going
05:25but it was quantity
05:26over quality
05:29I had loads of ideas
05:30for him
05:31as a big
05:32middle of the road artist
05:33he appeals to older
05:35women and stuff
05:36and there's nobody better
05:38that was his market
05:40that was his lane
05:40it just
05:41he
05:42he just got it wrong
05:43he just made the wrong
05:45choices
05:47he didn't even know
05:47where the fuck
05:48I was
05:49I opened in Sydney
05:50to 10,000 people
05:51he didn't know
05:52I was on tour
05:54get ready for another
05:55TV phenomenon
05:56pop stars
05:57The Rivals
05:57is coming in autumn
05:59it's good
05:59it's good
06:00we are going to get
06:01good singers
06:01at the end of the day
06:03Louis became
06:03a TV personality
06:06he was given that chance
06:08because he was the manager
06:09of Boyzone
06:10and that obviously
06:11gave Louis an opportunity
06:12but that took a lot
06:13of his time
06:14I was on the phone
06:15to Ronan
06:16all the time
06:17I talked to him
06:18every day
06:19and he always
06:20wanted more
06:21things start to
06:22fall into place
06:24and you realise
06:25Louis's not a great manager
06:27I gave him
06:28multiple opportunities
06:29to fix the problems
06:31so I went and met him
06:33and I said it to his face
06:33he just said
06:35he didn't want to be
06:35a karaoke artist
06:36and he wanted to
06:38record his own songs
06:39he wanted to write
06:40his own songs
06:40and he wanted to be
06:41a proper artist
06:42I've got one shot
06:43in my career
06:44and he did give a fuck
06:46that shocked me
06:48the fact that he wasn't
06:49happy with the songs
06:51they were all hits
06:52hey
06:53that's what you're
06:54in the business for
06:54having hits
06:56just fell on deaf ears
06:58I always told him
07:00the truth
07:00what was the truth
07:02you're lucky fucker
07:03you know
07:04this is great
07:05enjoy it
07:06and I remember
07:07going in and saying
07:08right
07:08that's it
07:10and what did you say
07:11I said okay
07:13nothing I could have
07:14done
07:14I couldn't have
07:14changed
07:14it was a divorce
07:20battle lines are drawn
07:21and you did have
07:22to pick a side
07:23I picked Louis
07:25I knew Westlife
07:26were going to be
07:26bigger than Boyzone
07:27it was in my own
07:28selfish interest
07:29but you had to pick
07:30somebody
07:30and Louis made that
07:31very clear
07:33it's this monumental
07:35shift in the media
07:37just the lag
07:38which in the newspapers
07:39changed
07:40and he was demeaned
07:42and diminished
07:43I called him
07:44talentless
07:45and different things
07:46here and there
07:47in the press
07:47he knew how to hurt me
07:50vicious fucking bitchy
07:52vicious horrible things
07:55he tried to ruin me
07:56and my career
08:00do I regret it
08:01yeah
08:01a little bit
08:02do you think he knows
08:03that you regret it
08:04no
08:05he doesn't know
08:07it was an incredible
08:09show of the strength
08:11of somebody who has the media
08:12they think it is
08:13you are who you are
08:14because I made you
08:16who you are
08:19I was with Ronan
08:20all the time
08:22you know
08:22I was there
08:23working with him
08:24every day
08:25so it was just
08:26inevitable
08:27that I would just
08:29take over eventually
08:31Mark Plunkett
08:32thank God for Mark
08:33I kept my sanity
08:35because of Mark
08:36we had a great time
08:38lots of touring
08:39lots of international
08:41trips
08:41lots of TVs
08:42all over the world
08:44you're mad busy
08:45because you're
08:45you're promoting
08:46your new album
08:48but the singles album
08:49this is it
08:50but there's inevitably
08:51going to come a point
08:51where the sales
08:53dip slightly
08:53the hits weren't
08:56quite as big
08:56as they'd been
08:57I made my third album
09:02my fourth
09:03and things started
09:05to slow down
09:05a little bit
09:07he wasn't
09:08having hits
09:11but he's not
09:12having any
09:12since I left
09:14at all
09:15I had done
09:16my party trick
09:18and maybe
09:19done it
09:19a few more times
09:20too much
09:21and
09:22I needed to
09:23figure out again
09:24who I was
09:24you know
09:25where I was
09:26so my compass
09:27kind of went back
09:28to
09:30to north
09:32to the boys
09:412006
09:42Gary
09:43was putting
09:44Take That
09:45back together
09:46so I went along
09:48to see the show
09:51all the fans
09:52noticed me
09:53and the whole place
09:55started chanting
09:56my name
09:56and clapping
09:57and I was like
09:58I thought
09:59I had been
10:00completely forgotten
10:01about so that
10:03was quite
10:04a surprise
10:09and then
10:09when I seen
10:10their show
10:12I was kind of
10:13feeling the
10:14bug again
10:15you know
10:18we just
10:19slowly but surely
10:20got to
10:20chat again
10:21to each other
10:22and little
10:22kind of whispers
10:23here and there
10:24you know
10:24Stephen would
10:25definitely be the one
10:26that would be
10:26pushing it
10:27with him
10:27this is going
10:28to be great
10:28you know
10:28we have to do
10:29this
10:29and just all
10:30spiralled
10:30into kind of
10:31was having
10:32a meeting
10:32let's get
10:33into a room
10:33that was all
10:34that's all
10:35it was test
10:35the water
10:41I was worried
10:41about the boys
10:42reaction
10:44I hadn't seen
10:45them for years
10:47there was
10:47resentment
10:48bitterness
10:51I was shitting
10:52myself going
10:52into the room
10:53yeah 100%
10:53I was nervous
10:54as hell
11:09you know
11:10you could feel
11:10there was a lot
11:11of scars
11:12people were
11:13unsure
11:14unsure it was
11:14going to work
11:16unsure they
11:16wanted to do
11:17it at all
11:19the rage
11:20the rage that
11:20I had
11:20with Ro
11:21in my mind
11:22when I saw
11:23I was going
11:23to fucking
11:23destroy him
11:25I was going
11:26to abort
11:26them
11:28very very
11:28very spiky
11:30that first
11:31moment
11:32walking into
11:32the room
11:33again
11:34I was
11:34fuming
11:35and when I
11:36saw his face
11:37I could do
11:38nothing but
11:38hug the
11:39fella
11:42I was going
11:43like I
11:44miss you
11:45that actually
11:46gave me
11:47a good
11:48insight to
11:48it's not
11:49always as
11:49bad as
11:50you think
11:50in your
11:50mind
11:52I would
11:52just like
11:53to
11:53apologise
11:54if anything
11:54I have
11:55said or
11:55done
11:55in the
11:56past
11:56seven
11:56years
11:56has hurt
11:57or affected
11:58anybody
11:58in a
11:59negative
11:59or
12:00unhappy
12:01fashion
12:01I wasn't
12:02the reason
12:03the band
12:03broke up
12:03but I was
12:04definitely
12:04the reason
12:04the band
12:05didn't get
12:05back together
12:05before
12:05and I
12:06apologise
12:06for
12:07that
12:08I made
12:09choices
12:09that I'm
12:09not proud
12:10of
12:11I left
12:11them
12:12behind
12:15for
12:15success
12:18I did
12:19have
12:19blinkers
12:19on
12:21didn't
12:21end
12:22right
12:22we need
12:23to do
12:23it
12:24right
12:25asked him
12:26if he
12:26thought
12:26there was
12:27any
12:27scope
12:27for the
12:27band
12:27getting
12:28back
12:28together
12:29things
12:30haven't
12:30always
12:31been
12:31as
12:31good
12:31as
12:31they
12:32are
12:32tonight
12:32it
12:32was
12:33great
12:33going
12:34in
12:34so
12:34successful
12:35as
12:35an
12:35actor
12:35but
12:36every
12:36now
12:36and
12:36again
12:37you get
12:37a surge
12:37of
12:38memories
12:38the
12:39audience
12:39being
12:40blown
12:41away
12:43and
12:43you
12:43go
12:43wow
12:44I'd
12:45love
12:45just
12:45one
12:45more
12:45chance
12:46maybe
12:47this
12:47could
12:47work
12:48now
12:48if
12:48we're
12:48all
12:48really
12:49on
12:49the
12:49same
12:49page
12:50you know
12:51it
12:51was
12:51there
12:51for
12:52the
12:52taking
12:53personally
12:53you know
12:54what I mean
12:54I'd like
12:55to do
12:55a little
12:55something
12:56I've
12:57really
12:57fucking
12:57missed
12:58all
12:58of
12:58you
12:58I mean
12:59I think
12:59it's just
13:00amazing
13:00being here
13:00I mean
13:01it's
13:01back
13:02it
13:03excited
13:03me
13:03you
13:04know
13:05I think
13:07kind of
13:07let's do
13:08it
13:08let's do
13:08a tour
13:09let's get
13:10to see
13:10if
13:11people are
13:11bothered
13:11with boys
13:12on anymore
13:29who's idea
13:30were those
13:31fucking
13:31outfits
13:41oh my god
13:43our first
13:43performance
13:44in
13:44eight years
13:46we're
13:47climbing
13:47underneath
13:47the stage
13:48to go
13:49on these
13:49trapdoors
13:49to be
13:50sprung
13:50loaded
13:50onto
13:51stage
13:53so nervous
13:54going up
13:55in that
13:55lift
13:55and
13:55kind of
13:57going
13:57oh my god
13:57I don't
13:57know where
13:58I'm going
13:58it's like
13:58it's rubbing
13:58the headlights
14:00you get
14:01a panic
14:01attack
14:01you get
14:02this
14:02kind
14:02of
14:02oh
14:03shit
14:05and it's
14:06amazing
14:11I remember
14:12that excitement
14:13how we felt
14:14in that exact
14:15moment
14:15with that
14:15countdown
14:17you can feel
14:18the breath
14:19you can feel
14:20the energy
14:20from a crowd
14:21and you cannot
14:22imagine what
14:23that's like
14:23it's
14:24unreal
14:48I couldn't hear
14:49the first two
14:49songs
14:49to be honest
14:50because the
14:51crowd was so
14:51loud
14:54I'm not
14:55there for
14:55glory
14:56I'm there
14:57to go
14:57look at all
14:58you people
14:59and look at
15:00the joy
15:00that we
15:00can bring
15:01you
15:12we designed
15:13a moment
15:13everybody
15:13would get
15:14their own
15:14little moment
15:15and I think
15:16that's why
15:16it felt
15:16so different
15:19I felt
15:20a part
15:21of the band
15:22for the first
15:23time
15:28that my
15:29efforts
15:29were being
15:31appreciated
15:32that we
15:33could now
15:33really be
15:34a band
15:37we'd fill
15:38each other's
15:38spaces
15:39without even
15:40thinking about it
15:40without even
15:41looking at each
15:41other
15:42if Shane
15:43was out
15:43far right
15:43I'd see him
15:45starting to move
15:45in
15:46if Mikey
15:46was in
15:47the middle
15:47he'd move
15:47over to
15:48fill my
15:48space
15:49and you
15:49just
15:49fill each
15:50other's
15:51voids
15:52and it's
15:53a real
15:53art
15:57we're back
15:57we're back
16:00I just felt
16:01you know
16:01unbelievable
16:03that was pretty
16:04magic
16:04getting
16:06the band
16:07back together
16:12that reunion
16:12tour was
16:13huge
16:14multiple nights
16:15in arenas
16:17and when they
16:17got back
16:18together
16:18they asked
16:19me to
16:19take over
16:20the managing
16:20I was glad
16:21to be involved
16:22I've been there
16:22since day one
16:24in the UK
16:26and I didn't want
16:27anyone else
16:27to carry on
16:28writing those
16:29chapters
16:30see we're
16:31we're a vocal
16:31harmony group
16:32we are
16:32we're not a
16:33boy band
16:34right
16:34the plan
16:35was then
16:35to work
16:36on a new
16:36album
16:36everyone was
16:37in a great
16:38place
16:41we as a
16:42collective now
16:43had more control
16:44over the music
16:45for the first time
16:46I was enjoying
16:48the music that
16:49Boyzone was doing
16:50took us 15 years
16:51to do that
16:55oh seven to
16:55oh nine were
16:56the best years
16:56of the band
16:58we were the
16:58most comfortable
16:59in our own
16:59skin that
17:00we'd ever
17:00been
17:02as soon as I
17:02get in a room
17:03and them boys
17:03I'm the silliest
17:04fella I was
17:05back when I
17:05was 17
17:06years old
17:06it's just
17:08kindergarten kids
17:09it was absolutely
17:10brilliant to be
17:11back with those
17:11fellas
17:12like nothing
17:13had changed
17:14like nothing
17:14had changed
17:19just seemed to
17:20share even more
17:21laughs than we
17:22had before
17:24I don't know
17:25just a better
17:26understanding of
17:27each other
17:29some people really
17:30came into their
17:31own Stephen in
17:32particular
17:32it was the best
17:36version of him
17:36I'd ever seen
17:37the other guys
17:38have got girls to
17:39dance with
17:39you've got a bloke
17:40yeah
17:40I don't have to
17:41be true to myself
17:42and that's how it
17:43turned out
17:43and I think it
17:44works beautifully
17:45with the song
17:45he was looking
17:47great
17:47he had a book
17:48going
17:49he had met
17:50someone new
17:50Andy
17:52they were just
17:53in love
17:53and got married
17:55very happy
17:57everything was
17:58going as planned
17:58presumably you're
18:00going to be
18:00working on new
18:01music together
18:01four singles
18:02and you have
18:03it already
18:03yeah
18:04well we think so
18:04we had done
18:05the better tour
18:06we had new songs
18:07for a new album
18:08and that brother
18:08album is our
18:10finest hour
18:11everybody was
18:12really really
18:12happy and in
18:13a good place
18:14it's a blessing
18:15being given
18:16a second chance
18:17and I'm loving
18:18every minute of it
18:31my phone rang
18:34it was a solicitor
18:35by the name
18:36of Gerald Keane
18:37who Boyzone
18:38had used
18:38in the 90s
18:39the phone rang
18:41picked it up
18:43and Gerald Keane
18:44says to me
18:45I
18:49I'm sorry
18:50I'm sorry
18:50to tell you
18:55but Stephen
18:56has passed away
18:59and I said
19:00Stephen who
19:02and
19:07he said
19:08Stephen Gately
19:10the Boyzone
19:11singer Stephen
19:12Gately
19:12has died
19:13while on holiday
19:13on the Spanish
19:14island of
19:15Mallorca
19:15at the age
19:15of 33
19:22I had to call
19:23Louis and the
19:24guys
19:27and give them
19:27the news
19:31it was late
19:33in the bar
19:34we were drinking
19:34and as I
19:35left the crowd
19:37Ro's voice
19:38came louder
19:39in my phone
19:40he's like
19:41Steele
19:41Steele
19:41he's gone
19:42I said
19:43what
19:44our Stephen
19:45he said
19:46yeah
19:46he said
19:47he's gone
19:48it just
19:49wouldn't go in
19:49what
19:51no no
19:52not our Stephen
19:53and I'll hear him
19:54screaming
19:56freaking hard
19:57you
19:58still hear
20:03can't breathe
20:05your legs
20:05got from under you
20:08it would get through
20:09in little bits
20:10and then
20:12it would be
20:12complete
20:12just
20:13breakdown
20:18my wall
20:19just fell apart
20:24numb
20:31we tried to put a plan together
20:33to get down to CSTO
20:36our instinct was
20:37just to get together
20:38so that force
20:41of companionship
20:42and that force
20:42of like
20:43okay
20:43where are you
20:44how can I get to you
20:45what do you need
20:46I couldn't tell you the journey
20:47couldn't tell you anything
20:49I just know
20:50we got on a fucking plane
21:00the body of Stephen Gately
21:01was found
21:02so far
21:02Gately's family
21:03have made no comment
21:04what caused Stephen
21:04Star's death
21:05on Saturday
21:06remains
21:06unexplained
21:08Miriam got me on a flight
21:09to Mallorca
21:10the next morning
21:12I get out there
21:13and it is heaving
21:18there was press everywhere
21:20it was crazy
21:21having the boys there
21:22they just couldn't move
21:23it was horrible
21:24it was horrible
21:26the kind of cesspit
21:27of journalism
21:28that sometimes
21:28it can all descend into
21:30well what can you tell us
21:32what's the latest
21:32well Karen
21:34there's been quite a lot
21:34of movement here
21:35at the apartment
21:35this is the apartment
21:36just beyond me here
21:37where Stephen
21:38actually passed away
21:39suddenly it's
21:40immediately like
21:41get the story
21:45what has happened
21:46what has happened
21:49nobody really speaking
21:50in the boys
21:50and camp
21:51officially yet
21:52but obviously
21:52there's quite a lot
21:53of speculation
21:54behind the scenes
21:55so then you're
21:56starting to get
21:57around the hotels
21:57and what clubs
21:58is the energy
21:58trying to put this together
21:59he was found by police
22:01and taken here
22:01to one of the island's
22:02mortuaries
22:03although nothing
22:03has been confirmed
22:04officially
22:05it's thought Gately
22:06and his partner
22:07arrived back here
22:08you know we'd
22:08we'd no idea
22:09what happened to him
22:10you know it's only
22:11what we've read
22:12and you know
22:12in the press and stuff
22:15conspiracy theories
22:15are running wild
22:16all the reporters
22:17they're exchanging stories
22:18well I heard this
22:19and I heard that
22:20lots of innuendo
22:22and lots of chatter
22:23about the circumstances
22:24around his death
22:25some of the rubbish
22:26that was written
22:26was just horrible
22:27the worst for me
22:29was they were saying
22:31it must have been drugs
22:33I was like screaming
22:35inside because
22:36like I knew
22:37like there was
22:38absolutely no way
22:39it was quite incredible
22:41the most
22:43the ridiculous articles
22:44that were written
22:44there was one in particular
22:47Stephen's sexuality
22:48had led to his death
22:50if he's gay
22:52it must mean that
22:54he's got this
22:55incredibly
22:56you know
22:56outrageous
22:57hidden lifestyle
23:00oh he'd been out
23:01on a bender
23:02and overdosed
23:03on drugs
23:04we were hearing
23:05everything
23:07having known Stephen
23:08for over a decade
23:11he was the last man
23:12to you know
23:13have a hedonistic lifestyle
23:14or a dangerous lifestyle
23:17it's the first time
23:18I've ever looked
23:18into my own industry
23:19my own world
23:20what I'd been part of
23:21and gone
23:21you scumbags
23:23my mother
23:25found
23:26two men
23:27at the end of her bed
23:28taking pictures
23:29of my parents
23:31as they woke
23:33basically broke into
23:34our house
23:35and went up the stairs
23:36and took pictures
23:40with everything
23:41that was happening
23:42I was just waiting
23:43for the autopsy report
23:44to confirm
23:45that it was something else
23:46because I knew
23:47it was something else
23:52pathologists here
23:53have concluded
23:54that he did not die
23:55as a result
23:55of alcohol
23:56nor drugs
23:58he had a heart defect
24:00that nobody knew about
24:02because of the heart defect
24:05his lungs filled with fluid
24:08we found out
24:09I have the same heart condition
24:11Stephen has
24:13funny how just
24:14you know
24:15a little tablet
24:15every day
24:16just sort of
24:17keeps that under control
24:18and Stephen only knew
24:21people didn't bother
24:22their arses
24:23to really
24:23read up
24:24on what happened
24:25they just see
24:26the headlines
24:27in the newspapers
24:28and they just assume
24:29that he's
24:30overdosed
24:31oh you were in that
24:32band
24:32with that dead guy
24:33did he kill himself
24:35I've gone
24:36from not to ten
24:37in a second
24:38at times
24:39you want to insult
24:39my brother
24:40I'll fucking kill you
24:41you know
24:42I don't care how big
24:43or strong you are
24:44you'd have to kill me
24:45to stop me
24:47but to hear
24:48that they were now
24:49putting like
24:50a name
24:51you know
24:51to what he died from
24:53makes it a little bit
24:54a little bit easier
24:55just
24:56because
24:57it was just
24:58like
24:59you could breathe again
25:08you know
25:09we brought Stephen home
25:13Margaret Stephen's mum
25:14asked us
25:15to look after
25:16the funeral arrangements
25:22we didn't like
25:23the idea
25:24of him being alone
25:25in the church
25:27overnight
25:27he didn't like
25:29the cold
25:29he didn't like
25:30being alone
25:32so we offered
25:33to stay the night
25:34with him
25:34in the church
25:35to keep him company
25:42when everybody else
25:44left
25:44and there was just
25:45the five of us
25:48there was a great
25:49sense of peace
25:51of unity
25:59I don't want to say
26:01sadness
26:01because
26:02believe it or not
26:03we actually had
26:04quite a
26:05comedic
26:07night
26:07and the usual
26:10joking
26:11that
26:13used to go on
26:14in the very early days
26:16when
26:18everything was innocent
26:19and naïve
26:21and naïve
26:22for that night
26:25that emerged
26:27we put easels
26:28all around the church
26:29of pictures of Stephen
26:31and we walked around
26:32looking at the different pictures
26:33the different smiles
26:34the energy in his face
26:36and we talked to him
26:38we knew what his part would be
26:40we all knew it
26:41we didn't have to say it
26:42we could feel his voice
26:43and his energy
26:44and we joked
26:45and we laughed
26:46and we talked
26:46about old stories
26:48and what a thing
26:49to share
26:49with those boys
26:51and with Steele
26:52those very last moments
26:53we still had him
26:55you know
26:55in some way
26:56we still had him
26:57just the five of us
26:59together
26:59and you hold on
27:01as long as you can
27:05yeah
27:05but morning came around
27:07real fast
27:16we had a mass
27:17a special mass
27:18prepared for Stephen
27:19it was really only family
27:21and the lads
27:22and friends
27:23close friends
27:23and when we turned up
27:25at the church
27:26there was people
27:26lined for miles
27:28and miles
27:33there was an ocean
27:34of photographers
27:35as well
27:36flashing away
27:37as we were going in
27:40so I went over
27:41to the photographers
27:42and I said
27:43you're welcome
27:43to come in
27:44I said everybody
27:45can come in
27:45and they all
27:46sort of stepped up
27:48to come in
27:48and I said
27:49you can leave
27:49your cameras there
27:50and then you can
27:51come in
27:51and pay your respects
27:54you know
27:54because he didn't
27:55pay your respects
27:55to him
27:56when he was alive
27:58you know
28:00none of them
28:01came in
28:01yeah
28:06we can only have
28:07so many in here
28:08in the church
28:08and I know
28:09we've so many
28:09many people outside
28:10so just thanks to you
28:12for coming along
28:13to share in this special day
28:15to remember Stephen
28:17Stephen was a force
28:19to be reckoned with
28:20a true friend
28:21full of love
28:22and friendship
28:23he brought colour
28:24to the band
28:25and that band
28:27now simply feels
28:27black and white
28:28without him
28:30we're gonna really
28:31miss you brother
28:32we love you
28:34we always will
28:43carrying his coffin
28:45with the other guys
28:47you could have heard
28:48a pin drop
28:53and this is on a street
28:55that was the toughest part
28:57to grow up in Dublin
29:00and the height of respect
29:02that the people showed
29:04for this boy
29:06from their neighbourhood
29:09it broke me
29:15the love he had
29:16was fucking gorgeous
29:18to witness
29:20it's a rare thing
29:21everybody loved him
29:24he was a true pop star
29:26he loved life
29:28you know
29:29he paved the way
29:30for so many
29:30to know it was okay
29:32I mean
29:33I hope that's not
29:34a legacy what is
29:37when I think of Stephen
29:39all I can see
29:40is
29:42him being
29:43like four years of age
29:44with his little t-shirt on
29:46with Miss Piggy
29:47on the front of it
29:49very innocent
29:50and shy
29:51and just looking
29:52looking up
29:53wanting to give you
29:55his hand
29:55for you
29:56to just take him
29:57just so lovable
29:58and kind
29:59and
30:01you know
30:03just a lovely person
30:16it felt better
30:18to be in each other's company
30:22than not to be
30:33we decided that maybe
30:34you know
30:34the right thing to do
30:35in Stephen's memory
30:36is to keep going
30:42shouldn't have
30:44the dynamic changed
30:46what it felt like
30:47to be in the band
30:49sometimes it was hard
30:50just to do the gig
30:51the three fellas
30:53and one missing
30:56the void was massive
30:57and it made you feel
30:59so self-conscious
31:00it made you feel
31:01like we were shit
31:02it made you feel
31:03that the audience
31:04just wasn't buying us
31:05anymore
31:09you know
31:10we went on and off
31:11over the years
31:12that followed
31:14ten years
31:16couple of tours
31:19never felt the same
31:21for me it wasn't
31:23until he was gone
31:24that I realised
31:24how much
31:25he was the glue
31:27that kept a lot
31:27of the band together
31:31whilst
31:31Boys and We're still
31:32being successful
31:33still selling a lot
31:34of tickets
31:34still touring
31:35all over the world
31:37to me
31:38it felt as if
31:39it was time
31:40to take a break
31:41but rather than
31:43splitting up
31:43and falling out
31:45announce
31:46the farewell tour
31:47I'm not saying
31:49anything
31:49it's flagging anything
31:50but I'm just
31:51staying
31:53it got more
31:54and more intense
31:56and relationships
31:59broke down
31:59within the band
32:01I spotted arrogance
32:03the growth of ego
32:07it just became
32:08hard work
32:11people started
32:12just behaving
32:13fucking badly
32:17and when that happens
32:18something's gonna give
32:22it came to a head
32:26in 2019
32:29I saw it all
32:29I was ready to get
32:30the fuck out of there
32:33it's when the band imploded
32:40I'm always ready for it
32:42I'm always ready for it
32:54you know what I mean
32:542019 was a tough tour
32:56we went everywhere
33:00I got a sense
33:02that towards the end
33:03people were just
33:04holding on tight
33:04enjoying the ride
33:05having fun
33:08when I can't
33:11I can't
33:12I can't
33:13I've got to sing
33:13every day
33:13I've got to last
33:14two hours on stage
33:15and you know
33:15I've got to be able
33:16to perform
33:17and in Tokyo
33:19I just felt
33:19the piss was being taken
33:27if you're coming tonight
33:28have a great time
33:29because we certainly
33:30are going to have
33:30a fantastic time
33:31see you later
33:33I always found
33:34going on stage
33:34a bit of a
33:35a party anyway
33:36it's everyone out there
33:38is having a great time
33:39I needed a great time too
33:40I mean they had been out
33:41all day
33:42and they were drinking all day
33:43and
33:45yeah it was messy
33:50we certainly
33:53partied a little harder
33:54than we usually did
34:04it was the end of the road
34:09I think that they interpreted
34:11me as seeing
34:14their carry on
34:15as infantile
34:19that is how I see it
34:22I'm sure if you talk
34:23to any one of the
34:24the fans
34:24at any one of those shows
34:26they'll tell you
34:26that they had
34:27the best night of their lives
34:28it was the worst
34:30it was the worst
34:31I had seen
34:32in all of our years
34:38so I went at the mall
34:39told them how I felt
34:41it was a tennis match
34:43from that guy
34:44to that guy
34:45to that guy
34:45you're not pulling your weight
34:46like I'm pulling my weight
34:48the job is always done
34:49you know
34:49he's done a great job
34:51and we did our job
34:53the way we did
34:53you know
34:54I gave it all
34:56at my detriment
34:57I gave everything
34:58to be the lead man
35:00you take on
35:01most of the work
35:02don't complain about us
35:03who aren't working
35:04as hard
35:06we don't have
35:06the opportunity
35:07it's very different
35:09you were the dude
35:10who wanted to be
35:10in the front
35:11so take your
35:12fucking roll
35:13and do it
35:13it had reached
35:15a complete stage
35:17of malignancy
35:21I had enough
35:22the next night
35:24there was a clash
35:25between Keith and Mikey
35:26in the dressing room
35:27there were things
35:28that happened
35:29that were cruel
35:33and I'm not
35:34going to express
35:36any more than that
35:37my mother always said
35:38if you haven't got
35:38anything nice to say
35:39don't say anything at all
35:42we left Japan
35:45some of us not
35:47talking
35:48with each other
35:49and yet
35:50we still had
35:51to do the
35:52final
35:53five nights
35:56in the palladium
36:04all the venues we played
36:05however big the venue
36:06might have been
36:07we always shared a dressing room
36:10always shared a dressing room
36:12and when we turned up
36:13at the palladium
36:16our names are on
36:17different doors
36:19we lasted 25 years
36:21flying on the same plane
36:23in the same cars
36:24in the same room
36:26and the final five shows
36:28that we were ever going to do
36:30we were going to do it
36:31on our own
36:35we went through the motions
36:36got through the five shows
36:38a very very big anti-climax
36:40there was no
36:42hollabaloo
36:42there was no group hug
36:44there was no
36:46well done
36:46there was no one
36:47from the record company
36:48walking on stage
36:49with a ten times platinum disc
36:51and saying thanks for everything
36:54I just wanted to get out of there
36:58get away from that
37:01toxic environment
37:03the realisation came
37:04that this is the end of the road
37:07it's over
37:21I haven't seen anybody
37:23since that night
37:29that's when I began to understand
37:31I need to make
37:32some changes
37:42I've spent the last ten years
37:43saying yes
37:44looking after everyone else
37:46making sure everyone else is alright
37:48but only now am I saying no
37:50no I've got to think of me
37:54so that I can be here
37:55to watch my children grow up
38:00for me personally
38:01I wouldn't be able to survive
38:03in that world anymore
38:04I had to get out
38:06and I cannot do that to my family
38:08go back in there
38:12it's an addictive drug
38:15because I took a back seat
38:17for such a long time
38:18over my career
38:19I feel that I still have
38:21so much left to prove
38:22to myself
38:25it's a real head fuck
38:28we've all moved on
38:30I've got Westlife
38:31you know
38:32I've had a great career
38:33in music
38:34so I'm happy
38:37I wouldn't have changed anything
38:40it wasn't perfect
38:41but it was perfect for me
38:44am I done?
38:47I'm going to go
38:48I'm going to run
38:54the music and the stage
38:57and the lights
38:57I can leave that behind
39:00but the friendship
39:02I think is what it is
39:03more than anything else
39:07as much as we
39:08had had enough
39:09of being around each other
39:10hello hello
39:12yay boys
39:14I couldn't bear
39:15to lose any of the boys
39:16I hope you haven't been here
39:17too long
39:17all fucking morning
39:19all morning
39:19I can't put his glasses on
39:20oh Jason
39:21you're too close
39:21you're too close
39:24how are you?
39:25good to see you
39:25you look like Jane
39:26Elson John
39:27oh man that's mad
39:28you're blind as a bat
39:29I have a lot of anxiety
39:31and I feel a lot of
39:32of the pain
39:34stuff that we've all
39:35gone through
39:36but put me together
39:37with them
39:38and that doesn't exist
39:39looking well as always
39:40you too
39:42where'd you get it?
39:46kindergarten kids
39:50as soon as they walk
39:51in the room
39:51it's like we've never left
39:53no no here we go
39:53here we go
39:54here we go
39:54here we go
39:55my head's better than yours
39:56I'm keeping it
39:56cheers lads
39:57cheers
39:58love you
39:58it's like we're frozen in time
40:07I wish them the absolute best
40:09in their lives
40:10I wish them nothing but happiness
40:11I hold no grudges
40:14no animosity
40:16nothing
40:18however
40:21I don't want to go back
40:26to how I felt
40:28for many years
40:30and to see them
40:33if it were for too long
40:35would remind me of that
40:38and my future
40:40is far too important to me
40:43to waste it
40:45looking back at my past
40:49but I wish everybody well
40:53for me
40:55one of the biggest regrets
40:56is that I clashed a lot
40:58with Mikey
40:59and me and him
41:00were very very alike
41:01the amount of time
41:03that we didn't get on
41:04that took its toll on me
41:06as a human being
41:07you know what I mean
41:07it's really sad
41:08the time wasted
41:08but that's
41:09you can't get those years back
41:11it didn't have to be that way
41:14if we all
41:16had have had
41:17better skills
41:19at understanding
41:21each other better
41:22we're boys
41:24and we're men
41:25and we don't talk
41:27like that
41:27it was never in me
41:28to go
41:29oh lads
41:29I don't feel great today
41:31it doesn't exist
41:32in a man's world
41:33I wish it had
41:34I have parked
41:36all of that emotion
41:37but we were kids Ro
41:38we were kids
41:39I was incredibly insecure
41:41and Ro
41:42I think we all were
41:43you know what I mean
41:43like that's
41:44they were fundamental years
41:45of you know growth
41:47mostly mental
41:48mental
41:52there's nothing
41:54more therapeutic
41:55than
41:56reminiscing
41:57about the best times
41:58of your life
41:59it reminds you
42:00of how lucky
42:01you have been
42:01the RDS show
42:03the first biggest show
42:04back in the RDS
42:04I'm looking back at that
42:06you know the song
42:06that I used to do
42:07when I pulled my trousers off
42:08it's hard to fucking fathom
42:09do you know what I mean
42:10can you remember
42:11the times with Steele
42:12fucking catapult
42:13like that
42:13slingshot back
42:14to the fucking 90s
42:15I remember being in
42:16Kuala Lumpur
42:17and I didn't know
42:17if that was South America
42:18or Asia
42:18you and I
42:19with our ghetto blaster
42:20listening to
42:21bleeding Enya
42:22you know
42:22in 94, 95
42:23don't tell any hip hop
42:24man
42:25hip hop
42:31I am so grateful
42:33for all that I have endured
42:36and experienced
42:37good and bad
42:38because it's brought me
42:40to be the man I am today
42:45every single day
42:46I have something
42:47to do with music
42:49waking up
42:50with a spring
42:52in my step
42:54the guy before
42:56I joined Boys Zone
42:57was slim
42:58healthy
42:59fit
42:59full of vitality
43:02full of confidence
43:03full of passion
43:07that's the guy
43:08that's returning
43:13there's a great sense
43:14of liberation
43:19ready
43:19lovely
43:21how's
43:22spinnies
43:24I think we'll always be
43:26what we always are
43:29and that's brothers in arms
43:31oh cheating
43:32cheating
43:33boys who grew up
43:35on the fucking north side
43:36of Dublin
43:36that got catapulted
43:38around the world
43:41there could have been
43:42you know
43:44a million other lads
43:45in Ireland
43:45that got in that band
43:47but I don't think
43:48they would have been
43:49as fucked up
43:50as the five of us were
43:52and that's what
43:53made us brilliant
43:56and when you think
43:57about it
43:57starting off
43:58playing in front of
43:5925 people
44:00on the back of a truck
44:01to playing to
44:03100,000 people
44:04in Hyde Park
44:05how amazing was that
44:07it's a hell of a ride
44:09success
44:11and all of the good times
44:14really do outweigh
44:15all the bad times
44:18these boys
44:19are my boys
44:20and I will love them
44:21forever in a day
44:24and when we're together
44:25Stephen Gately is alive again
44:27and that's what's
44:28the most special part
44:31we did have a great laugh
44:36and it's like
44:36looking back at a picture
44:39saying to God
44:39this is amazing
44:46that's our story
44:46it was a good one
44:52they came to you
44:53and asked you
44:53should we get back together
44:54and do a reunion show
44:55what would you say
44:58wow
44:59wow that's a question
45:04look I'd be lying to you
45:05if I said
45:06there isn't a spark
45:08of excitement
45:09in my mind
45:10people as far as
45:11the eye can see
45:12and the roar
45:13of the crowd
45:13that
45:14yeah
45:15I would love to
45:16experience that again
45:17who wouldn't
45:20but there's so much
45:21more going on
45:22backstage
45:23so perhaps
45:24leave well enough alone
45:28or
45:29maybe
45:30I know I said
45:31I'll never go on tour again
45:32but they stayed there
45:33going on tour
45:34I'm not getting left behind
45:35you're mad
45:36who knows
45:38you're mad
45:39I said
46:03I'll never go on tour
46:03I'll never go on tour
46:03I said
46:04I said
46:05I said
46:05what are you
46:06I said
46:06I said
46:06I'll never go on tour
46:06I said
46:07or
46:07I said
46:08Transcription by CastingWords
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