- 3 hours ago
Full Episode of Life Is Not a Game
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00:01jupiter you there the game already started where are you
00:09jupiter if we lose this it's on you
00:12who the hell is jupiter we need you come on bro we're getting fucked over here
00:20don't you fucking dare
00:27fuck you dj
00:29hey guys you still on we're here let me guess you were hooking up again you said you'd be on
00:35don't let shame me mars you're a guy you'd be doing the same thing leave him alone at least
00:40he shows up to play mars gets it he dropped us for a girl too for sure you know me
00:47just a guy's
00:48guy fighting girls off left and right
00:56come on you guys ready yeah start it
01:09whoa easy there oh hi tj
01:14sorry do i do i know you no well kind of i mean we've been in classes every year since
01:21middle
01:21school but jj are you serious right now it's the first day of school and you're already trying to
01:26get your body count up no that's not at all leave the poor girl alone she's clearly not into it
01:34just because you were born first doesn't mean you can act like mom
01:36oh my god i am so sorry about him he does not know how to turn the fuck boy thing
01:46off
01:48you're charlotte right
01:50tracy oh my god my best friend you look so good why are you letting this desperate nerd rub up
01:58on my man
02:00leave her alone sadie you're my brother's groupie not his girlfriend
02:06don't worry after football season is over then he's gonna put a label on it
02:11i'll see you at practice we'll try so hard not to drop you
02:18aren't you two friends we were friends until i found out that she was just using me to get to
02:24my
02:24brother how about i tell you all about it after school you want to come over to my place
02:30please please i clearly need to broaden my social horizons
02:36okay really yes hello
02:50tracy upstairs
03:13gory is that you
03:17oh shit
03:21you okay
03:28two tackles in one day should join the football team
03:33i'm so sorry i'm not well apart from getting you all sweaty
03:38you know if you didn't spend so much time looking at your feet
03:45you wouldn't run into people as often
03:48right sorry
03:50it's okay
03:52i need to apologize
03:55i just want to see your face
03:58not so bad right
04:03what the fuck is going on
04:08calm down
04:09i was going to say hi
04:11okay great
04:13now say bye
04:17bye
04:20tj
04:26hey yo trace
04:27looking fine
04:29hey
04:31so uh
04:32you ladies doing anything later tonight or
04:37yeah okay bet yeah
04:39catch you later
04:39better look next time
04:41man fuck you
04:43dog
04:44i got news
04:45huge news
04:46we got in the strike from above tournament
04:49holy shit dude
04:51dude that's huge
04:52right
04:53our first pro league
04:55i mean sponsors gonna be knocking down our doors
04:57and it's in person so
04:59finally get to meet mars man
05:02i mean you really think he's gonna come out of hiding for this
05:04yeah of course he will
05:05we've been best friends with the guy for years
05:07you more than me
05:09and how many times has he come up with some
05:11bullshit excuse
05:12dude this time's different
05:13all right we'll just
05:13we'll tell him about the tournament he'll be psyched
05:15let's just give him a chance
05:16i don't want to fuck up the friendship
05:18i didn't fuck things up when you and i met each other
05:20and mars knows that
05:25all right whatever the fuck
05:26we'll do it your way
05:28but the guy's your best friend
05:30you text him about it
05:32all right
05:33i'll text him
05:38uh just so you know what you saw with tj
05:41wasn't anything
05:42no i know
05:43my brother is a dipshit
05:47a smart girl like he was like
05:48so out of his league
05:50that's not true
05:53but thanks
05:54and then thanks for inviting me over
05:57and i'll do this a lot
05:59what?
06:01girl time?
06:02friend time
06:19you okay?
06:21yeah yeah i'm
06:22i'm no but
06:24i
06:26i
06:27i
06:28okay
06:28um
06:30so
06:32there's this
06:33guy that i've
06:34been talking to forever
06:36and
06:37well
06:38we've never met in person
06:39but he wants to
06:42tomorrow
06:43oh my god
06:44what?
06:45uh
06:45is he home?
06:47i
06:47i don't know what he looks like
06:49we met online
06:50so i don't know who he is
06:52i don't even know his real name
06:54okay
06:55well you obviously have a crush on this mystery man
06:59so you should say yes
07:02oh my god girl why not
07:05seriously
07:07because he thinks i'm a boy
07:13uh
07:16i have
07:17simply
07:18too many questions
07:21but first things first
07:24we
07:26need to get you ready
07:27for this meet cue
07:31first option
07:33go on
07:35i kinda like this one
07:37no
07:38absolutely not
07:41no
07:42absolutely not
07:43mm-hmm
07:44yes
07:45no
07:45trust me
07:46see the vision
07:48you look incredible
07:52very revealing
07:53very revealing
08:01no
08:01no
08:03no
08:16you look beautiful
08:47wow
08:48can you go to hell
08:48with sadie
08:49of course you can
08:51now go
08:52get your mystery man
09:13tj
09:18hey
09:21charlotte
09:21what are you
09:23what are you doing here
09:23is tracy with you
09:25yeah
09:26yeah tracy sent me to
09:27to tell you that
09:29we're gonna be studying at your house
09:31after school
09:32okay
09:34yeah so that's
09:35the message
09:37i'm
09:37i'm just gonna
09:39gonna go
09:43hey
09:44hey wait
09:46you uh
09:47dropped your phone
09:49by the way
09:50you look
09:50sorry i'm late
09:51did you show
09:52did who show
09:53mars
10:00sorry guys
10:01went home sick
10:03man i knew he would bail on us again
10:19okay
10:20spill
10:21how's your take
10:23mystery man
10:24um
10:26it didn't really
10:28happen
10:30what
10:33stop eavesdropping
10:34perv
10:36i can't believe
10:36mars bailed on us
10:37i told you
10:39he's never gonna show
10:41we should just register
10:43for the tournament
10:43as a duo
10:44we're not a duo
10:44corey we're a team
10:47he would have showed up
10:48if you knew it was at stake
10:53what are you doing
10:55i'm just gonna tell him about the tournament
10:57and if he doesn't want to meet up then
11:00we'll go from there
11:36hey can i um
11:37can i borrow you for a sec
11:48i know it's you
11:50mars
11:57yeah
11:58i have an extra phone charger
12:01it's inside
12:09i have so many questions
12:11starting with
12:12what the fuck
12:13followed by
12:14you're a girl
12:16and since when do pretty girls
12:18catfish people
12:19you think i'm pretty
12:20i have eyes
12:21okay even if you're way more tj's type than mine
12:24but
12:25wait
12:26is this whole thing just some evil elaborate plan to get closer to tj
12:30like are you making a doll out of his hair or something
12:33what you know
12:34i
12:35i didn't know who you guys were until today
12:38and then when i saw tj standing there
12:41i just
12:42couldn't go through with it
12:44i mean you could have just told the truth
12:45it's not that simple
12:47you two have been my best friends for years
12:52my only friends
12:56do you hate me
13:00no
13:02no
13:02i'm glad to finally know who you are
13:06really
13:09yeah
13:10bring it in man
13:18am i interrupting something
13:24looks like you two again friendly
13:25no
13:26and we were just talking about how we're both um
13:30cancer sons
13:31yeah
13:32i mean we gotta hug out all this emotion
13:35i'm gonna go back outside but hey
13:37me you talk about moons later right
13:40mm-hmm
13:41yeah
13:47so what are you guys really talking about
13:49nothing
13:53secrets don't make friends
13:54charlotte
13:58you finally remember my name and now we're friends
14:02you're in my house right
14:05hanging out with my sister
14:08i like the new look
14:09by the way
14:12to be fair i liked your old look too
14:15you didn't know i existed until a day ago
14:18oh i saw you
14:22hiding in the corner
14:27i like that you're not hiding anymore
14:37char i should go
14:38are you coming back
14:40i gotta be home for dinner
14:55mars are there
14:58hello
15:02mars
15:05voice changer enabled
15:06mars
15:09jupiter
15:09hello
15:10thank god you're awake
15:13i went to a party
15:14cops shut it down
15:15now i'm all wired and shit
15:18hold on i'm so mad at you
15:20i'm sorry i just
15:21i couldn't do it
15:24don't you want to know who we are
15:27i want to know who you are
15:33well
15:34maybe we've already met
15:40dude no way
15:42i would know you in a heartbeat
15:46i bet you can figure out who i am though
15:49come on take some guesses
15:53okay
15:57based on the clues that i've put together
16:00you're a jock
16:02athletic
16:04confident
16:05getting hotter
16:07hot for sure
16:09nice body
16:10nice smile
16:11oh what the fuck
16:17mars are you
16:19are you attracted to guys
16:21yeah
16:22yeah
16:25i'm gay
16:26oh dude
16:28is that why you didn't show
16:32man we don't care about that shit
16:34hell i'll fight anyone who does
16:37thanks jupiter
16:38yeah man of course
16:40that's awesome
16:41you uh
16:42crushing on any guys at school
16:44i can help
16:46i'm chill with the drama club
16:47there's lots of
16:50cute guys in there
16:51oh thank you
16:52but i'm good
16:54i promise
16:59so how was this party
17:01i was
17:03weird
17:04i was trying to have a good time
17:06but feeling
17:06fucking
17:08lame
17:10and then i realized that
17:14there was someone i wanted to be there
17:17and she wasn't
17:21you were missing
17:23a girl
17:26yeah
17:29she's different from
17:30the ones i usually go for
17:33she's quiet
17:35shy
17:36i just
17:40makes me think there's a whole world inside of her
17:42you know
17:42and i just
17:45want to get her to let me in
17:48what you should do is get some sleep
17:54yeah you're probably right
17:55good night jupiter
17:56hey wait
17:57uh before you go
18:00you know
18:00tracy and
18:03tj
18:03they're not great
18:07they're having a party
18:08tomorrow night
18:09and uh
18:09natu and i are going
18:12you should come
18:13we can
18:14we can run that meet up again
18:20i'll see what i can do
18:37are you still texting mystery man
18:41i wish you would just tell me who it is so i can help
18:45no i'm i'm still figuring out how to tell him
18:48okay do i have to say this again
18:50charlotte you are stunning
18:52if this crush doesn't work out
18:53you can have your pick of literally any guy here
19:03okay
19:04almost
19:05any guy
19:06one that is actually worth your time
19:10don't forget
19:12party planning at my place after school
19:13and we will try to steer clear
19:15of my man whore brother
19:36hey charlotte
19:38you uh looking for my sister
19:45she's not here
19:46practice is running long
19:50oh um
19:51i can wait
19:53i guess
20:01what are we playing
20:03strike from above
20:06you game
20:08and dabble
20:11you want to come dabble upstairs
20:20play around with me
20:24come on
20:25come on
20:40you okay
20:43S铆, es solo que yo usually play a mi computadora.
20:47S铆, mismo aqu铆.
20:49Pero esta lista es mejor para co-op.
20:52驴Qu茅 te dir谩mos, vamos a ver qu茅 vamos a hacer como un equipo?
20:59O sea, podr铆amos hacer jugador contra jugador.
21:04驴Pvp?
21:06Me gusta tu estilo.
21:08Pero deber铆amos hacer un buen estilo.
21:10驴Puedo hacer un buen estilo?
21:11S铆.
21:14El ganador se puede preguntar el ganador la pregunta de su elegir.
21:19No hay los niveles.
21:28驴Qu茅 piensas mucho, no?
21:31驴Has siempre sido as铆?
21:34I thought you could only ask a question if you win.
21:40All right, bye.
21:44Picture clear.
21:47I think I'm going to go with her.
22:02You should have parried there.
22:05Oh, thank you.
22:08Don't stop.
22:22Don't stop.
22:23Yes.
22:24Wait, what?
22:25Holy shit.
22:27You beat me.
22:29No.
22:31Hey, maybe it's easier on the TV.
22:35No way.
22:37No, I've only seen one other player pull that move.
22:42I learned it on Reddit.
22:46Okay.
22:48And I guess you beat me fair and square.
22:50So, what's your question?
22:58Do you have a celebrity crush?
23:00Come on.
23:01No softballs.
23:03You got to have a better one than that.
23:07What?
23:10We've gone to school together for years, TJ.
23:13Just because you don't know anything about me doesn't mean I'm clueless about you.
23:19Ouch.
23:22Guess I deserve it, though.
23:26Wish I had talked to you sooner.
23:32So, tell me, what do you really want to know?
23:40Go on.
23:43Ask me.
23:46Do you have a crush on someone at our school?
23:48Yes.
23:54Ask me another.
23:57Who is she?
24:01Well, that should be obvious.
24:05I'm not very good at hiding it.
24:15Those cheerleader bitches actually fucking dropped me.
24:23Ew, TJ.
24:24Why are your sex lights on?
24:26They're not my se...
24:27That's not what I was...
24:28Oh, my God, Tracy.
24:30Uh, Charlotte, why don't you head to my room and start making a playlist for tonight?
24:33I will be right there.
24:35Yeah.
24:35Yeah, okay.
24:38Are you all right?
24:39Oh, yeah.
24:40It's just a bruised ass.
24:41I'll be fine.
24:49You can literally go for any other girl.
24:51Why are you only thirsty over my friends?
24:54Historically, because it pisses you off.
24:57But this is different.
24:59Okay, so that's Sid then.
25:02You're admitting to liking Charlotte.
25:07What would you say if I was?
25:11All I'm going to say is I don't think she's interested.
25:15Is there someone else?
25:18Oh, come on, Trace.
25:19You don't have to tell me who.
25:21Just tell me if I'm wasting my time.
25:24She's texting another guy.
25:28Fine.
25:29Then you have nothing to worry about, right?
25:32So remember that when she sleeps over tonight.
25:35Relax.
25:37Charlotte and I are just friends.
25:40Nothing more.
26:01Oh, my God.
26:02Oh, finally.
26:03You look amazing.
26:06Happy official birthday.
26:08Thank you.
26:09You need a drink.
26:14Who are you texting?
26:16Mars.
26:17He said he might show up.
26:20Oh.
26:20Eddie now.
26:21Yep.
26:39Okay.
26:41Oh, my God.
26:42Did you guys all just see that?
26:44Look at this little virgin.
26:45She thinks TJ's fuck-me eyes are for her.
26:48When are you going to stop humiliating yourself, huh?
26:50What are you guys talking about?
26:52Oh, uh, we were just talking about how we're going to spice this party up a little bit.
26:56Maybe play some Spin the Bottle.
26:57Hmm.
26:58But you can just watch Virgin.
27:01She can play.
27:02Stop being a bitch at my party, Sadie.
27:04Yeah.
27:06I'll play if Charlotte plays.
27:14Okay, so I'm going to spin to see who goes first, and then we're going to go counterclockwise.
27:19Obviously, siblings can't kiss.
27:21That's fucking gross.
27:22But everyone else is fair game.
27:25Don't chicken out, prude.
27:32You're up first, big guy.
27:39Oh, wow.
27:40Nice.
27:42You ready for this?
27:44Just kiss me, weirdo.
27:47Oh, God.
27:50Wow.
27:51Wow.
27:54It's disgusting.
27:56Okay, let's keep this moving.
27:58TJ, it's your turn.
28:06It's me.
28:07No, it's in the middle.
28:09Doesn't that mean that TJ gets to pick?
28:23Wow, it's her first kiss.
28:25It's her first kiss.
28:27It's her first kiss.
28:28It's her first kiss.
28:31Can I kiss you?
29:00Gracias por ver el video.
29:02Gracias por ver el video.
29:38Gracias por ver el video.
29:59Gracias por ver el video.
30:12I don't know what to say.
30:14Just be honest with me.
30:18Do you have feelings for my brother?
30:23I'm so sorry, Tracy.
30:24I didn't mean for this to happen.
30:31I don't know what to say.
30:32Charlotte, you're literally still texting Mystery Man.
30:34It's not what you think.
30:36He'd take it from me?
30:38There's nothing my brother hates more than a liar.
30:43Did something happen?
30:48Our dad cheated on our mom.
30:52She kicked him out, but she still hasn't recovered.
31:00Neither has TJ.
31:02So when it comes to lying and sneaking around, he doesn't forgive.
31:10So if you really are into my brother, you need to drop Mystery Man.
31:25Got you now, two-timing virgin skank.
31:33Hey.
31:34I know what you're going to say, and I'm working on telling him.
31:38I was actually going to ask if Tracy would tell anything about me, but...
31:41I mean, yeah, dude, what the fuck?
31:43Like, especially after that kiss?
31:46It's not alright, bro.
31:47Okay, well, how would you tell him?
31:49I would just do it.
31:50Like, do you want to wait until the tournament and just fuck up his game?
31:53No, of course not.
31:55Because that would fuck up the friendship, too.
31:56You know that.
31:59Yeah, well, I'm also worried about Tracy.
32:02It's not just you and TJ anymore.
32:03He's my best friend's brother.
32:07Look, I know there is a lot on your plate,
32:10but if you don't tell TJ,
32:14I'm going to tell him that we should enter the tournament as a duo.
32:17What?
32:18Look, I'm sorry, dude.
32:20But if you can't even be honest with your teammates,
32:23you can't be on the team.
32:29Bye, guys.
32:30Have a good night.
33:15TJ, what are you doing here?
33:16Sorry, I thought I heard a phone.
33:18Is yours in here?
33:19My phone?
33:20It's in Tracy's room.
33:32Okay, you can turn around.
33:35Why did you just barge in here?
33:38Earlier.
33:39Was that really your first kiss?
33:46Hey, come on.
33:47You can tell me.
33:48Can I?
33:50I thought it was just a game to you.
33:51Yeah, well, I lied.
33:54My sister was right there.
33:59It wasn't just a game, Charlotte.
34:03Not to me.
34:06Any of that kiss
34:10made me realize that
34:13all of your firsts,
34:16I want them to be with me.
34:25We shouldn't do this right now.
34:27It's late, okay?
34:28We should go to bed.
34:45Let me guess.
34:47Tracy's drunk ass was passed out.
34:50And she locked her bedroom door?
34:53Yeah, she always does that during parties.
34:56Guess you're stuck with me.
35:05TJ, we should really discuss
35:13sleeping arrangements.
35:15That one's easy.
35:17I have a bed.
35:18We both fit in it.
35:20I'm soft.
35:24Don't you
35:26want to share a bedroom?
35:40Wait, what are you doing?
35:41I'm going to go sleep on the couch.
35:42You don't have to do that.
35:43I can sleep on the couch.
35:44Charlotte,
35:47I'm trying to be chivalrous here.
35:49But I want you.
35:55I want you to stay.
36:02Okay.
36:04I'll stay with you.
36:20So how'd a girl like you get someone to video games?
36:24Would you ask a boy that question?
36:27Come on.
36:33video games give me the chance to be someone else.
36:38Someone braver.
36:42Making friends was harder for me than most people.
36:47I don't know what's wrong with me.
36:48There's nothing wrong with you, Charlotte.
36:56The moment I laid eyes on you,
37:00I felt like I knew you.
37:04I can't explain it.
37:05It's like
37:07we weren't starting from the beginning.
37:11We were already close.
37:14You're someone I know
37:15that I can trust completely.
37:17DJ,
37:18I really want to kiss you right now.
37:28Okay.
37:46Sorry.
37:47I know I'm probably not a good kisser.
37:49No.
37:50No, it's not that.
37:56It's just it's never felt like that before.
38:00Like what?
38:03Like I want to keep kissing you for the rest of my life.
38:12Can I just hold you?
38:14Okay.
38:17Yeah.
38:18Yeah.
38:47Gracias por ver el video.
39:16Gracias por ver el video.
39:20Here.
39:21Our final guild trip to get you to play in the tournament.
39:25TJ designed it.
39:26You wanted it to be a surprise for you.
39:29Actually, I'm...
39:30I'm gonna tell him right now.
39:32As soon as he gets here.
39:34Good.
39:36I'm proud of you, dog.
39:38I see someone's still sledding it up all over the school.
39:43Are you gonna keep fucking your way around every guy on campus or just the football players?
39:49What's wrong with you?
39:50Seriously, Sadie, that was way too far.
39:53Here's your phone, Char.
39:55Ooh, you're finally meeting Mystery Man?
39:58Tracy.
39:59Jupiter?
40:00Is that like a nickname?
40:01That's kinky.
40:02Wait, Jupiter?
40:04Like TJ's video game character?
40:07What do you mean, TJ's video game?
40:10Another tackle?
40:11Third time's the charm.
40:17Why is everyone by my locker?
40:19Oh my god, it's you.
40:21You're Jupiter.
40:23The mystery man that Charlotte is talking to is Jupiter, aka TJ.
40:30Charlotte.
40:34You're Mars?
40:37Here I was, thinking that you're just talking to some rando, but no, it's so much weirder than that.
40:42You're a catfish.
40:45Charlotte, is that true?
40:47No, no, I swear that it wasn't.
40:49I didn't know that you were Jupiter until I saw you that day waiting for me.
40:52And then you just kept lying to me.
40:53I was trying to find the right time to tell you, and I was going to.
40:56Right now.
40:56That's why I was at your locker.
40:58Cora can back me up.
41:02Are you fucking kidding me?
41:04You knew.
41:06Dog, I found out myself, okay?
41:08And I wanted to tell you, but it was Charlotte's decision.
41:12So you were both in on it?
41:18You two deserve each other.
41:20TJ.
41:22TJ.
41:49TJ's not here.
41:50I know.
41:51He's at practice.
41:53I came to see you.
41:57It's bad enough that I like your brother, and then lied to him.
42:05But I lied to you, too.
42:08When you were nothing but nice to me.
42:13And so I just wanted to apologize.
42:19Even if you still hate me.
42:29Wait.
42:36I don't hate you.
42:39But I do appreciate the apology.
42:44All this time,
42:47my brother was your mystery man.
42:54And you.
42:57Or the person he's told me about all these years.
43:01His best friend.
43:05I know it seems like the world is over.
43:10But you can fix this.
43:31Voice changer disabled.
43:36TJ, are you there?
43:40Jupiter?
43:44I don't want to talk, Mart.
43:47Charlotte.
43:48You don't have to say anything back.
43:49Just please, let me explain.
43:57When we first met years ago,
44:00I didn't have any friends.
44:05The only thing that I was good at was video games,
44:08but when I logged on,
44:10I was told to go away because I was a girl.
44:15And so I started using a voice changer.
44:19And it gave me a way to make friends,
44:21but as a boy.
44:24And it seemed harmless.
44:28And it was until it wasn't.
44:38I spent years liking Mars more than I liked Charlotte.
44:45And you were the first person to make me feel like both parts of me matter.
44:51And that's when I knew that I was a girl.
44:55And that's when I knew that I wasn't.
44:59But that doesn't matter anymore.
45:04All that I can hope for now
45:10is to get my best friend back.
45:23I'm going to the tournament with Corey tomorrow.
45:27And Tracy's going to be there to cheer us on.
45:31Will you be there?
45:35Please.
45:53Jupiter has left the chat.
46:15He's not coming out of his room.
46:17Well, it's too late to register as a duo.
46:20Once they find out we're missing a member,
46:22they'll disqualify us.
46:23I'm so sorry, Corey.
46:25It's okay.
46:26Going pro is probably overrated anyway.
46:29Come here, you big doofus.
46:34What was that for?
46:37You were too sad.
46:38I didn't like it.
46:40Pretty hypocritical, don't you think?
46:46You're allowed to date my friends,
46:48but I can't be interested in yours.
46:54It's about time.
46:57We're good, man.
46:58I'm happy for you.
47:02Let's go in the car.
47:11I wish I could just hit reset.
47:14Start over like a video game.
47:16Life's not a game, Charlotte.
47:22Last night you were about to say something
47:25before you started talking about the tournament.
47:28What was it?
47:29It doesn't matter.
47:30I think it does.
47:35Why?
47:41Losing the girl that became my everything broke me.
47:46But losing my best friend,
47:50that almost killed me.
47:56then I realized I was being an idiot
47:59that I didn't have to pick.
48:07I want you in my life.
48:11Both of you.
48:12All of you.
48:18I love you, Charlotte.
48:23I love you, too.
48:41You ready to win this tournament?
48:43You're playing?
48:45Hell yeah, I'm playing.
48:52Yeah.
48:54Yeah, let's go win this.
48:57Pretty sure I already did.
48:58I love you, too.
49:01I love you, too.
49:02I love you, too.
49:02I love you, too.
49:03I love you, too.
49:04I love you, too.
49:06Gracias.
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