- 5 hours ago
EastEnders 12th March 2026 Full Episode
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TVTranscript
00:00Music
00:19You alright?
00:23I am now...
00:26Goodness!
00:33Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:38Maybe we should consider getting away.
00:41Before things get too messy.
00:42Yeah, cause last time we ran away from our problems
00:44it ended really well, didn't it?
00:46Look, I'm just saying that the people Mark's involved with,
00:48they wouldn't think twice about setting fire at this gaff.
00:50That is exactly why I can't just leave him
00:52without trying to get him out of it.
00:55Please just drop it.
00:56It is.
00:58Are you serious about going into work?
01:01DJs and caterers ain't gonna pay for themselves, are they?
01:04No.
01:05You stick in the house today, I'm not having your guard in the gaff again.
01:08If anything happens, you phone your side away, have they?
01:15Morning.
01:15Morning, mate.
01:16Thanks very much.
01:18You alright, Vic?
01:20Phil's rucked me in at the gym.
01:22Pretty boys I've seen in case you wanted to take him from sleep.
01:24You took the act!
01:26You told me that you were gonna find another way to get out of this.
01:31Killy Ravi!
01:33What's told me last night?
01:36Mark!
01:38This ain't you.
01:40Well, if it's between protecting my family or some geyser I barely know.
01:44You know, you pick me.
01:46Yeah.
01:47What about Ravi's family?
01:50Until I prove you're sorted, you're in danger.
01:53And I ain't having it.
01:54I don't know.
01:55I don't know.
01:56I don't know.
02:02Rav Jot Singalati.
02:03Yeah, um, he needs to be seen today, okay?
02:05It's urgent.
02:07Yeah, he's next to me, he says it's fine.
02:10Oh, they put me on hold.
02:16It's just me babe.
02:20Okay.
02:20Um, yeah, yeah, that's great.
02:22That's great.
02:23Thanks.
02:25What's the point in same day appointments if the receptionist makes you beg to get one?
02:30Well, we could go another day.
02:32Yeah.
02:33No, no, I've got you an appointment for later.
02:37Look at me.
02:40I know he's quick, but after everything that's happened this week...
02:48I'll go.
02:54Mum, I need a donkey costume for Red Nose Day.
02:57What do you need a donkey costume for for Red Nose Day?
02:58Look, can you get your shoes on please?
02:59We'll leave them in five minutes.
03:00I will, I'll sort it.
03:02Oi!
03:03That's mine!
03:04Oh.
03:05Louie!
03:06Can you stop drawing on everything you see?
03:08This is my work stuff, yay?
03:10Why I got you a notepad in the first place!
03:12Sorry!
03:14What if Picasso's mum said that to him and he ended up never paying the 16th chapel?
03:19Since when were you taking back Anders from Elaine?
03:22I thought you was working for Ian.
03:23Well, bisexual, bipartisan, king that buys me.
03:27One advantage of living in the house that time forgot is finding relics everywhere.
03:31Eh?
03:32Don't have way too many pics of Brian looking at Burke and her albums.
03:36Stalker.
03:37Err...
03:38Is this depressing vibe cos you still ain't shifted that car?
03:42I wouldn't buy anything from you of this aura you've got, Lauren.
03:45Can you just pack it in please?
03:46Look, you've got a fit fella, sick job, you're living the dream, Lauren!
03:52What has gotten into you today?
03:54Look...
03:57Look...
04:05Oh, please, Lauren, stop shouting!
04:08Okay, yeah, I should've told you about Caleb, alright?
04:10But he's not a weirdo or a tea leaf, he's more of a giver anyway!
04:13Oh, please!
04:13Look, he's got his thing of being silent in the morning unless he's saying his goals out loud.
04:18You should try that with the car.
04:19Say or sell it.
04:20You will!
04:21I can shift a car without some mute hippies techniques, thank you!
04:25Do me a favour, Lauren.
04:27Smile.
04:31Double sausage on white and enough sugary pastries to make Willy Wonka jealous.
04:36Yeah, I'm starved!
04:38I'll charge extra for delivery, by the way.
04:41Erm, Al.
04:43Please, we'll pay you later.
04:45He owes me for doing double duty.
04:50Julie and Yolando wanna know if we wanna get food with them a bit after we've seen Nigel.
04:53Eh?
04:54I thought you'd be too ill for that.
04:56Bill.
04:58Can I have a word?
04:59Well, could it wait?
05:02Listen, tell them I'm outside, yeah. I'll be in with you in a minute, yeah?
05:07Let me guess, it's about Mark.
05:10This gang have said that if he don't find the rat, kill them today, they're gonna come after me next.
05:15Listen, he doesn't know what he's got himself into, but if he actually doesn't...
05:20I don't wanna beg you for help again, but he needs to get out of this mess.
05:26Please.
05:27So, I've got Lexi to think about it, yeah?
05:29What happens if I get involved, yeah?
05:31If I get involved, then it all goes wrong.
05:33Well, what happens to Mark if you don't?
05:38Right, I'll finish here with Lex.
05:40And then I'll talk to Mark, all right?
05:42But listen, if you don't listen, I'll try again.
05:59Sorry about the wait, Mr Galati.
06:08Who can I help today?
06:13It's just Ravi.
06:14My name.
06:16Ravi.
06:23Tell her.
06:31I bet I've been stressed for a few weeks.
06:40It ain't a big deal.
06:44He's been hurting himself.
06:46I need to hear this from Ravi.
06:50Is that how you got the facial bruising too?
07:01Look, he ain't been right for months.
07:04Okay?
07:04He's shutting himself away.
07:06Getting into fights.
07:08We...
07:09We ain't having sex.
07:11Brilliant.
07:11Look, she needs to know.
07:13Okay?
07:13You're not okay.
07:14None of this is okay.
07:17I'd like to ask you a few questions about what your partner said.
07:23Is that all right?
07:30Have you seen these?
07:31My dad won't stop being nominated.
07:33Fair play.
07:34A link could have put a lot worse on there.
07:36It's your idea, is it?
07:38Is this, Beely, what you want?
07:39Ten points for the pun.
07:41Well, you're lucky my dad ain't around this morning.
07:43Because you reckon you'll be done for libel.
07:44Only if it isn't true.
07:46All's fair in love and war and local politics.
07:49Ronnie?
07:50Oh, what?
07:54I didn't ask for a smear campaign.
07:55I just wanted, in tone, fresh ideas.
07:59So you bring your best to our meeting this afternoon, yeah?
08:02Absolutely.
08:02I've been thinking about it all night, Elaine.
08:04Thinking, thinking, thinking.
08:06My brain, ready to go.
08:09Good.
08:09I'm expecting great things.
08:11Sure.
08:12Yeah.
08:14Oi.
08:16Nice touch with the posters.
08:19All right, then.
08:20It sounds for fresh fruit and bread.
08:22Banner Bowl.
08:22Come on, get all your berries, your bananas and your broccoli
08:25from the freshest store out here.
08:27Come on, you beautiful people.
08:28Banner Bowl's best bananas.
08:30Any mental illness in your family history?
08:34I don't know.
08:39And do you know which feelings drive you to self-harm?
08:48Ravi, do you have thoughts of ending your life?
08:56No.
09:02Okay.
09:04Thank you for sharing.
09:06I'm gonna refer you to the mental health team.
09:10At the minute, the waiting list is around eight weeks.
09:13Eight weeks?
09:15But there are other things you can do when you feel overwhelmed.
09:20Um, meditation, exercise.
09:22Are you joking?
09:23Look at the state of him.
09:25If you need it, the Walford crisis team can help in the MEDSA.
09:29I can give you some pamphlets.
09:31Oh, eight weeks wait for those and all.
09:32Look, I'm not joking.
09:34I bend over backwards to get you an appointment,
09:35and she's suggesting labour breaths and cardio.
09:37I...
09:38It can help.
09:39For some, I think you'd benefit from something for the anxiety
09:44and the lack of sleep you mentioned.
09:47I'll have that prescription sent over to the pharmacy on Turpin Road.
09:52Erm, could you actually send it to the one on the high street, please?
09:57I've got a few things I need to pick up.
10:05You seem like you have a strong support system around you.
10:27Your sister's been on my case.
10:32Have you spoken to anyone yet?
10:34About Ravi.
10:36Not you at all, Phil.
10:38Ravi chose to be a grass.
10:40He deserves everything he gets.
10:43When you think this won't be the only thing that you think about one day.
10:47Hey?
10:47When you're a liar and blaming your old man,
10:49blaming anyone for the mess you made with everything.
10:54Tougher blokes than you and tougher bokes than Ravi have been broken by this life.
10:58And this...
11:00This ain't you.
11:02You put the bullet in Ravi now.
11:06It's only an hour of time before someone does that thing.
11:09Or...
11:09Or you do it to yourself.
11:12Now you want my help getting out of this.
11:16You say something now.
11:18Cos I won't be offering again.
11:23Yeah.
11:26Why?
11:29I'll make some calls.
11:34It's not me, innit?
11:35Runs like a dream.
11:39Good luck, Lauren.
11:40Yeah, there's a couple.
11:41They're gonna come back later.
11:42They're just gonna think on it for a bit.
11:44Don't be stupid.
11:45It's the oldest one in the book, that is.
11:47Obviously, I ain't interested.
11:50Maybe it's your face that scared them off.
11:52What's that supposed to mean?
11:53Well, it wouldn't kill you, would it?
11:54Crack a smile.
11:56Look like Eeyore.
11:58And you're the face of eternal happiness, are ya?
12:00Listen, Lauren, right?
12:01I've had plenty of satisfied customers coming out of that office over the years.
12:05Shift it, yeah?
12:06Today.
12:07It's costing me money.
12:08Rust in there.
12:09Yep, it'll be gone.
12:12That doctor weren't bad in the end.
12:14After all that come-by-ass stuff.
12:17I'm sorry for waiting in earlier.
12:21Um...
12:21I'm gonna lie down.
12:24Okay?
12:24Okay.
12:27Hey, how you been?
12:35Doctors.
12:37Is he all right?
12:38He just wants everything to get back to normal.
12:41Yeah.
12:47No.
12:48Come here.
12:50All right, I'll see you in a bit, yeah?
12:52Yeah.
12:56Are you okay, Mum?
12:59Yeah.
13:00Yeah, I'm okay.
13:14Hey, Dad.
13:17Hey, Dad.
13:23Dad?
13:28Dad?
13:37I'm okay.
13:41All right.
13:43I'm okay.
13:44I'm okay.
13:44I'll see you later, yeah?
13:46Yeah.
14:07Well, you got yourself in all right, miss, didn't you?
14:12Would you speak to... Is it so weird?
14:23Phil, is it sorted?
14:28You're not as different from the old man as you like to think you are, you know, getting
14:32yourself in trouble and putting other people in the firing line.
14:36I spoke with you, Katha, and this is all with his heart, it's over.
14:41When you've been around as long as I have, you get to know where the bodies are buried
14:44and we can call in a few favours.
14:47Cheers, Phil.
14:49You can start taking this place seriously and I'll...
14:52You can manage it until Cheryl gets back.
14:54Yeah, anything.
14:55Well, I'll cover for you this afternoon.
14:57You need to concentrate on raising some cash.
14:59You're going to need it.
15:01A few words from me only goes so far.
15:04He wants 100 grand.
15:14Yeah, she's a beauty, ma'am.
15:19You okay?
15:20Yeah.
15:22Uh, Phil hasn't meant to see Nigel this week.
15:27Oh.
15:29Give him time.
15:30He's Nigel's best friend.
15:31He'll be there.
15:36Oh, customers?
15:37Don't waste a time with him.
15:38They ain't going to buy nothing.
15:40They do, mate, all right?
15:41All right, ladies?
15:42Well, you know, I know he's going to be chewing your ear off about this.
15:45Oh.
15:46How is he?
15:47Uh, yeah.
15:48It's good.
15:49Thanks.
15:50I went to see him earlier, but home...
15:53Everyone's visiting him and putting their weight.
15:55Well, most people.
15:58I'll tell you what, next time we get a classic car in,
16:00I'll take you both for a spin.
16:01I'll do the driving this time now.
16:03All right.
16:04I think we could squeeze in a little sparkling water.
16:08Or something stronger.
16:10Don't you want to make your way home,
16:12or are they enough of me or raises early?
16:14No, no, no, no, no.
16:15Patrick's been playing dominoes with Ollie for days.
16:17He won't miss me for hours.
16:18Come.
16:20Mm.
16:24All right?
16:26Sure.
16:26You interested?
16:28Couldn't comment.
16:30You're a kept woman, aren't you?
16:32Nobody keeps me, thank you.
16:34It's Peaky Boy, know that.
16:37You raid the piggy bank to buy this place or what?
16:41Uh, worse.
16:43Made a deal with the devil.
16:47It's a nice car, though.
16:48Yeah.
16:50What's horsepower on it?
16:51110.
16:52It's a bit low by today's standards, but...
16:55I mean, it's not bad for a classic car.
16:57And also, you won't even notice, will you,
16:58when you've got the top down, the sun shining.
17:02There ain't nothing I don't know about this car.
17:05And if you buy it off me,
17:07then we'll get my dad off our back, so...
17:09Yeah, yeah, yeah.
17:11It's a nice motor.
17:13Let's see if a bike is as good as a bike, eh?
17:16Got time for me to take for a test drive?
17:18Yeah, definitely.
17:19Let me get my stuff.
17:20Uh, you ain't gonna come.
17:21I'm only going round the block.
17:23Scout's honour.
17:24Come on.
17:25It's the first thing you learned.
17:26You don't let go of the keys.
17:28All right, well, um, in that case,
17:30give me 30 minutes, I'll grab my licence and come back.
17:33Of course.
17:35Oh, it's easy work, Dad.
17:40What'd you write about?
17:41Phil, have you spoken to him yet?
17:43Call me.
17:45Vic.
17:47I'm getting out.
17:48I don't know what you said to Phil,
17:50but he sorted it.
17:52No-one's coming for you.
17:57Phil called in a favour.
17:59I just need some money to pay off the boss.
18:02How much?
18:03Oh, only a couple grand.
18:05Oh, look, if I had anything
18:06that weren't tied up in the wedding...
18:07I'm not asking, OK?
18:09I'm gonna sort this myself.
18:10And after all this,
18:12I'm gonna go straight.
18:13You know, just start helping
18:15running the gym more than that.
18:18What about Ravi?
18:20He is the luckiest man alive.
18:31Ian's all about global reach.
18:33He came up with that.
18:35Global.
18:35Doesn't he get bored naming things after himself?
18:38I mean, beel this, beel that.
18:39You know what I call him?
18:41A beel end.
18:44He should be buried.
18:47Politically.
18:48Not literally, obviously.
18:50I just want to know
18:51who he's meeting with
18:53and what's his next move.
18:54I need a scoop, darling.
18:56Yes.
18:57Ah.
18:59Doors on a latch,
19:00but then again, brothels
19:01are always except walk-ins, don't they?
19:03Do you know what?
19:04It really is too good to be true.
19:05I wish I had a journalist with me.
19:06I mean,
19:07past it to pensioner
19:08preys on vulnerable staffer
19:09from opposition.
19:10Oh, that's a bit of a mouthful
19:12of a headline, isn't it?
19:13I think you need an editor.
19:14Oh, well.
19:15Tacky posters.
19:17Plying my staff with alcohol.
19:19I mean, I'm not ashamed of my past
19:21and you spelt counsellor wrong.
19:23Oh.
19:23Who said I wrote it?
19:26Oh, you double-dipper.
19:29That's biophobic.
19:30And I wasn't even going to tell her
19:31anything about your campaign.
19:32Then why am I wasting my best vodka
19:34and a salary?
19:35Oh, you're paying him.
19:37Oh, more for you.
19:38I mean, I was just doing it
19:39as a favour for Lauren.
19:40You're sacked.
19:41Yeah.
19:41Technically,
19:42can you be sacked
19:42from a voluntary position?
19:43Er, yeah.
19:45I'm no-one's meal ticket, darling.
19:47You're fired.
19:48I can do this on my own.
19:50Oh, really?
19:51Good luck.
19:53That's just...
19:54Oscar, darling.
19:56Get out.
20:02Smoother than I thought.
20:04You call that a smooth drive?
20:06Leave off.
20:07We don't drive manual in America.
20:11It's a nice motor, though, isn't it?
20:14Mm-hmm.
20:15That's what the bloke said earlier as well.
20:17We did sink in.
20:20Look, I could knock off 3%,
20:21maybe even 5% at a push.
20:23I can't afford this car, Lauren.
20:25I'm completely skint.
20:28Right.
20:30So driving badly
20:31round the back ends of Wilford
20:32is how you get your kicks, is it?
20:34On a mini?
20:35Yeah.
20:38Look, I'm sorry, OK?
20:40I just know what it's like
20:42to have family on your back.
20:45So, I'm missing dinner
20:47for a deep and meaningful.
20:50Could buy you a sandwich.
20:52I can't afford that,
20:53if it's on offer.
20:56Go on, then.
20:58Give you a chance
20:59to check the crack
20:59on the back bumper.
21:01What crack?
21:02There ain't no crack.
21:03Reckon that'll take off
21:04more than that 5%,
21:05you're offering.
21:10Crack.
21:20Oh, come on.
21:21Help me!
21:22Oh!
21:25Oh!
21:26Oh!
21:27Oh!
21:31Oh!
21:34Oh!
21:37Oh!
21:41Oh!
21:48Lauren!
21:52Are you alright?
21:57You're alright, you're okay, you're okay.
21:58I'm here, I'm here, it's okay.
21:59I'm here.
22:06Ooh!
22:10I saw wine in the afternoon and I'm...
22:13cream-crackered.
22:15Lexi, are you alright?
22:16Yeah, yeah, she's gone with cancer here, his brother, his wife.
22:20Oh, well...
22:21It might, er...
22:23free up a bit of time for you, eh?
22:26What do you mean?
22:27Everything that's been going on, er...
22:30Nigel's taken a...
22:31bit of a back seat, hasn't he?
22:35Well, we could go together over the weekend.
22:37Listen, you stop going all about me going to see Nigel, yeah?
22:46Er...
22:47Hmm, you know...
22:49it's not my favourite place...
22:51either.
22:53But it's really important that...
22:56he keeps to, er...
22:58a routine, you know, he...
23:00sees his...
23:01best mate...
23:02again.
23:03He...
23:05He can't...
23:06keep avoiding him.
23:11He needs you, Phil.
23:26Oh, it's still.
23:27It...
23:28It looks worse than it feels.
23:29Stop fussing.
23:30Come on, Lauren.
23:32What happened?
23:33Just some thug lifted the car.
23:36Where were you?
23:38Lauren had an eating, so I went to get her a sandwich.
23:41You called the police?
23:42Yes.
23:42Yes, they're on their way.
23:44I'm fine, by the way.
23:45Thank you for asking.
23:45Two days.
23:45Two days have been in business.
23:47Brought here, the car nicked.
23:49Well, at least they can't do much without the paperwork.
23:52Yeah, I...
23:53I took them with me.
23:54Lauren?
23:55I thought it was a done deal!
23:56Can you not just be grateful that she's all right?
23:58Yeah, of course I am.
23:58It says it's a 20 grand motor.
24:01You know, we're not always in here having nighy-bargy.
24:04Sometimes you do it in the pub.
24:05You should join us sometime.
24:07What scar?
24:08Well, you got what you wanted, Dad.
24:11The car's gone by the end of the day, so there you go.
24:13You win.
24:13It was a nice car, alright?
24:15It's bound to get attention.
24:17You just got unlucky, Lauren.
24:19That's all.
24:19Hopefully I'll, erm, have more luck on my next test drive.
24:23I'm glad you're okay, Lauren.
24:25Mate, thank you.
24:26Thanks very much.
24:27Yeah, no worries.
24:27Thanks for stepping in.
24:28I'll get her back in one piece.
24:31It's for the cab.
24:32Cheers.
24:33See you later.
24:34See you later.
24:38Lauren, I just want the insurance out, yeah?
24:44Ravi?
24:46Ravi?
24:48Ravi?
24:49What?
24:51What?
24:53Oh.
24:54Oh.
24:55Oh.
24:55Oh.
24:58Oh.
24:59Where have you been?
25:00Where have you been?
25:01I've been calling you.
25:02I was...
25:02I went to the gym looking for you.
25:03You've been gone forever.
25:05I fancied a walk.
25:10Where are the kids?
25:12What?
25:12How are we mates?
25:14I thought...
25:16I was worried.
25:18Yeah, I just wanted to clean my head for a bit, you know?
25:24Priya, I don't want you to worry.
25:26He's Tom.
25:27I'm on my own.
25:28You...
25:28Yeah.
25:29I know, everyone.
25:31Look, are you sure you can wait eight weeks for this referral?
25:35We can try and find the money to go private.
25:37No, no, no.
25:39Hey, let me try with the meds, yeah?
25:43Look.
25:44It really means a lot, you know?
25:47You're trying.
25:50I'll run you a bath, yeah?
25:56I love you.
25:58I love you.
26:06I love you.
26:29Right, mate?
26:31I sorted them over, yeah?
26:33What the hell were you playing at?
26:36You weren't supposed to touch her.
26:37She got Larry.
26:39She's a live wire.
26:40When can you shift this motor, anyway?
26:42Tomorrow.
26:42My man on the other side moves quick.
26:45I'll take my cutting cash when it's there.
26:47You better hope she don't remember what you look like,
26:48or you ain't getting a cup.
26:51Get out of my face, now.
27:03what the hell is going to go.
27:04The more than I need what the money is going is,
27:05the more getting ready for a lifetime.
27:05What's going on...
27:05Planets!
27:05...theятель.
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