00:00Grazie a tutti
00:30Mamie, non c'è nessun cammino qui.
00:31Get up.
00:32Grandma was a total b***h.
00:33Oh, she was Chinese.
00:34Alex, when is Cindy going to be here?
00:36She didn't want to come in here earlier
00:38because she can't stand any of you.
00:40Sometimes I don't blame her.
00:41Your mother had one request.
00:43The traditional Chinese funeral.
00:46It takes seven days.
00:47Seven days?
00:48We never did that for Dad.
00:50What, your patients can't put off
00:51their Botox injections for a week?
00:53If it were my mother,
00:54nothing would be too big or too expensive.
00:57She's not your mother.
00:58She's our mother.
01:00Got that?
01:00It's difficult to forgive.
01:02Your mom's dead.
01:03Can't you just try and be nice to each other
01:05for once?
01:07Didi and I are planning on having a baby.
01:09How?
01:10We just need some sperm.
01:11Our mother spent her entire life
01:12pitting us against each other
01:14and hardly had a kind word for any of us.
01:16Look at you kids.
01:17Can't we talk to each other?
01:18She's the one who slept with a black man.
01:20Elizabeth is the one whose son passed away
01:22and Alex here has a mistress.
01:24We know what our mom thought of us.
01:26What do you think?
01:28Hey, sperm donor.
01:29You are a monk.
01:30A gloop a monk.
01:31We can have sex.
01:32You didn't need a thing.
01:33I have to keep my figure.
01:34Ever seen a fat ninja?
01:36Just thought this would be a good time
01:37to go over the contents of her will.
01:39So what do we get?
01:40Nothing.
01:41Nothing?
01:41Nothing.
01:42Nothing?
01:42Nothing?
01:43Your mother wanted one thing
01:45that this family would come together
01:46finally and for real
01:48and I'd like to believe that that can happen.
01:50We'll do everything we can
01:51to give mother a traditional Chinese funeral.
01:54But how?
01:55We're Americans.
01:56Tradition for his son and his wife
01:58to be buried next to his mother and father.
02:00Our father was cremated.
02:02Oh yeah, his ashes ended up in a vacuum cleaner.
02:04By mistake, I was young.
02:09By mistake, I was young.
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