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Short filmTranscript
00:00:04So I'm playing the space show for the second time, and this guy passes out.
00:00:08All right, it's about that time.
00:00:10Sorry, are you kissing anybody in the room?
00:00:20Yeah, him.
00:00:22Hi!
00:00:23It's you.
00:00:24Six, five, four, three, two, one!
00:00:30Six, five, four, three, two, one!
00:00:54Maybe we can't see her.
00:00:56It's just my birthmark.
00:00:59Do you want me to stop, Timmy?
00:01:03I don't want you to stop.
00:01:05I don't want you to stop.
00:01:11I don't want you to stop.
00:01:14I don't want you to stop.
00:01:37I was so drunk last night.
00:01:39I can't remember who I was with.
00:01:45I must return this to her so I can see her again.
00:01:53Happy New Year.
00:01:54Sam, it's me.
00:01:56Hey, find me the girl from last night.
00:01:58I don't care how.
00:01:59Just do it.
00:02:01I will find you.
00:02:08Maximus, can you get married already?
00:02:11I'm a wife or at least a girlfriend.
00:02:14I need grandkids.
00:02:16I need you to...
00:02:16Message received, Mom.
00:02:18I need to go now.
00:02:19I have to inspect the new headquarters.
00:02:30Seven years.
00:02:31Why can't I ever find you?
00:02:33Why do you still hunt me?
00:02:43Still thinking about that girl?
00:02:45Boss, it's been years.
00:02:50I'm ready to go to the inspection.
00:02:52Your request, sir.
00:02:54But first, we found your fake Christmas light.
00:02:57She's waiting in the coffee shop.
00:02:58Blonde hair, red top.
00:03:00And, sir, make sure you use an alias.
00:03:02We can't have her know the Harrison Group CEO or she'll check up the price.
00:03:06Good.
00:03:07Finally, I can get my mother off my back.
00:03:12Hi.
00:03:13One iced real latte, please.
00:03:15And one hot chocolate.
00:03:18I can't wait to finally meet my new daddy.
00:03:21Now, Auntie Deborah and Pamela can't say I have no daddy anymore.
00:03:27Sweetie, remember, it's just pretend.
00:03:29It's just for Christmas.
00:03:30But, Mommy, why do we have to rent a daddy?
00:03:33What's my real one?
00:03:41Uh, I'll tell you when you're older.
00:03:44Sweetie, why don't you go find us a table?
00:03:54Daddy!
00:03:55Oh, what?
00:04:03Daddy!
00:04:04No, I'm sorry.
00:04:07I'm not your dad.
00:04:08No, I know you're my dad.
00:04:10You're just as handsome as I have to be.
00:04:12Oh.
00:04:13Mommy, hurry.
00:04:14Your fake Christmas husband has arrived.
00:04:23I asked the agency for an average-looking guy.
00:04:27He's gorgeous.
00:04:29Oh.
00:04:32Oh.
00:04:34Why does she feel so familiar?
00:04:37She's waiting for a cotton shop.
00:04:39Blonde hair, red top.
00:04:40You must be my new Christmas husband.
00:04:44So, you're my new Christmas wife.
00:04:46See, I knew you were the new daddy we had, red.
00:04:49Hi, my name's Hyper.
00:04:50What's your name?
00:04:52Sam didn't say anything about a kid.
00:04:54Max, Aurelius.
00:04:56Eva.
00:04:57I think we should probably sit and discuss the details of this fake marriage.
00:05:02I just need a wife for the holidays.
00:05:04I guess mom gets her grandkid, too.
00:05:08So, for our agreement, the rate is $1,000 per hour, and...
00:05:14$1,000 an hour?
00:05:16Well, yeah.
00:05:18It's $500 a day.
00:05:20Is that enough?
00:05:21That's the most that I can pay you.
00:05:23Wait, you're paying me $500 a day?
00:05:25That's when I agreed with the agency.
00:05:27You make $2,000 over the week.
00:05:29Look, my requirements are simple, okay?
00:05:31Play my pretend husband, come with me to my hometown,
00:05:34and we all pretend to be one big, happy family.
00:05:36And then my family will get off my back,
00:05:38so Piper can have a good Christmas for once.
00:05:43So she's getting pressure from the folks, too.
00:05:46Fine.
00:05:47But she'll have to help me get my mom off my case, too.
00:05:52Okay.
00:05:53Deal.
00:05:56I need to go get married.
00:06:11I need to go get married.
00:06:28Mom.
00:06:50Okay.
00:06:52Hey, uh, let me think we got it.
00:06:54Oh, I need some photos of us together, too.
00:06:58To prove to my parents that I'm actually married and have a happy family.
00:07:02Yeah, of course.
00:07:13Happy holidays, Mom.
00:07:15From my family to you.
00:07:25Bad news, boss.
00:07:27The agency said that the girl that they recruited to be your fake wife bailed last minute.
00:07:31But she bailed.
00:07:32Then who is...
00:07:36Who is she?
00:07:39Whatever.
00:07:40It doesn't matter.
00:07:42I'll try what I need.
00:07:45Sam, don't worry about it.
00:07:47I already found someone.
00:07:53Okay, well, I think it's time for us to go.
00:07:57Christmas shopping waits for no one.
00:07:59Christmas shopping?
00:08:00I should come.
00:08:02Look, if you want me to be the husband in this figure to your family plan,
00:08:06I think I should have some say in the gifts.
00:08:08We'll make it more believable.
00:08:13Fine.
00:08:14Yeah, fine.
00:08:15Okay.
00:08:15You can come.
00:08:19Okay.
00:08:20Okay.
00:08:24Let's go.
00:08:25Where's Molly going, Sam?
00:08:26Uh, not from the water.
00:08:28Oh, through the bank.
00:08:34Oh!
00:08:35What the actual fuck?
00:08:41Sam, is Maximus pulling another one of his goddamn elaborate pranks again?
00:08:47Give me a DNA test for that little girl that he's with.
00:08:53She does kind of look like him.
00:08:58So when we give these gifts to my parents, we will say they're from you.
00:09:04Yeah, they're from you.
00:09:06I'm gonna love you, Max.
00:09:09Also, I was, uh, thinking that since we're married, we should probably kiss once or twice in front of them.
00:09:21Okay.
00:09:22Should we use our tongues or?
00:09:24No, no, definitely not.
00:09:26And absolutely no.
00:09:27Sex?
00:09:29Yes.
00:09:30Strictly business.
00:09:32Anything physical outside of that is not happening.
00:09:36What?
00:09:37Afraid you'll fall for me?
00:09:40I just don't want Piper to have messy complications getting in the way of her having a good Christmas.
00:09:47So.
00:09:54What are you doing?
00:09:56I never let my woman pick up the tab.
00:10:00Well, I'm not your woman, and this isn't a real relationship, and I don't want your money.
00:10:07Attention shoppers, all bakery items are now 50% off.
00:10:1050% off pies.
00:10:12Quick, go grab a dozen pumpkin pies.
00:10:1412 pumpkin pies, I hear this right?
00:10:15They're the best kind.
00:10:17Hurry up and go.
00:10:18Cool, what are you standing here for?
00:10:21Hello there.
00:10:22Hi.
00:10:23You ready?
00:10:23Yes, yeah, just two things.
00:10:25Okay, great.
00:10:26We have a holiday special today.
00:10:28Spend $500, get 10% off, and you're just short $15 if you want to take advantage of the deal.
00:10:34Oh, great, yeah.
00:10:36What do you have that's just $15?
00:10:38Can you get a move on?
00:10:40I just got here, relax.
00:10:43Yeah, yeah.
00:10:46Here, this will do the trick.
00:10:48Okay, thank you.
00:10:51Hurry up and pay.
00:10:55I will pay when I'm ready.
00:10:57You can wait your turn.
00:11:03Damn, my fake wife has some fire in it.
00:11:12I'll be waiting at the pumpkin.
00:11:13I'll be waiting at the pumpkin.
00:11:14Yes.
00:11:15I'll be waiting at the pumpkin.
00:11:18Yes.
00:11:18I'll be waiting at the pumpkin.
00:11:20Hi, guys.
00:11:22Can I hand you all these pies?
00:11:28Of course.
00:11:30Thank you so much.
00:11:31Of course.
00:11:32I hope you like pumpkin.
00:11:34She bought all 12 pies.
00:11:36Sorry, I have enough for everybody.
00:11:38Just to give it away.
00:11:41Merry Christmas.
00:11:42Merry Christmas.
00:11:47What?
00:11:48Do you do that often?
00:11:50As often as I can.
00:11:52I can.
00:12:21You done feeling me up?
00:12:24Shut up.
00:12:25Sorry, I was just in character, wifey.
00:12:28Well, stay out of character until Christmas.
00:12:35And don't be late.
00:12:48Harrison Group?
00:12:50Do you do construction for them or something?
00:12:53Sort of.
00:12:54Not that I'm judging.
00:12:55I just need to get my story straight or my mom will eat most of us alive.
00:13:01Why don't we say that you do mid-level management for Harrison Group?
00:13:04I think that's respectful.
00:13:07Can we pick another company?
00:13:08Oh.
00:13:09Harrison Group is perfect.
00:13:11They'll find it impressive.
00:13:13My cousin's husband works for them, too.
00:13:15So, perfect.
00:13:20Oh, and, uh, are there something nice for Christmas dinner?
00:13:24Don't worry.
00:13:25Okay, I clean up nicely.
00:13:26I wouldn't embarrass you.
00:13:30Too much.
00:13:51Let's go, Sam.
00:13:53It's time to check out the new HQ set.
00:13:55God, you're covered in water.
00:13:57You have a bear on your shoulder and it's not yours.
00:14:01It's a daughter.
00:14:02It's a daughter.
00:14:04Give me a DNA test for that little girl that he's with.
00:14:23Hey, there they are.
00:14:25Hey, there they are.
00:14:26Hey, there they are.
00:14:28How's that?
00:14:29Aren't you made it?
00:14:30Oh, I missed you.
00:14:32So, where is this mysterious husband that we heard about?
00:14:36He's coming.
00:14:37Please don't tell me Maxim's failed.
00:14:42So, I heard you got a new hubby, sweetie.
00:14:46When's he arriving?
00:14:47Oh, it's probably just some story she cooked up to stop people talking.
00:14:52Poor thing.
00:14:53Not surprising.
00:14:54I mean, she's 30.
00:14:56Once a woman hits that age, you become undateable.
00:14:59Plus, a kid looks so bad on dating apps.
00:15:05This is exactly why I refuse to come home single this Christmas.
00:15:09Thank you, Pamela.
00:15:10Daddy.
00:15:11My dating life, quite frankly, is none of your concern.
00:15:14We're only worried about you.
00:15:16All these years without a husband.
00:15:19Zip it, Pamela.
00:15:21You know, you always spoiled her rotten.
00:15:24And look what happened.
00:15:25She got knocked up out of wedlock, raising a kid all alone.
00:15:29I'm not alone.
00:15:31Mm-hmm.
00:15:31And what does this mysterious husband do?
00:15:37He's manager.
00:15:39Manager?
00:15:40Of what?
00:15:42Trash.
00:15:43Probably a culprit for criminal activity.
00:15:48You don't have to lie to us, Eva.
00:15:53Actually, he's right here.
00:15:57Oh, wow.
00:15:59Wow.
00:16:00He's really good looking.
00:16:03Oh, must be AI.
00:16:05Mm-hmm.
00:16:06Congratulations, Eva, on your Photoshop skills.
00:16:10That's enough.
00:16:11She's our daughter, and your niece.
00:16:13Show some respect.
00:16:14Remember last year when I introduced you to my husband's nephew, William,
00:16:20and you turned him down?
00:16:22Well, guess what?
00:16:23William works for the Harrison Group now.
00:16:26Makes 500 grand a year.
00:16:29That's half a million.
00:16:31Half a million.
00:16:33Girls are lining up for him all the way to New York.
00:16:37And speak of the devil.
00:16:41William, you made it.
00:16:54There you are.
00:16:56Oh, look at you now.
00:16:59Living the dream.
00:17:01Oh, Jess.
00:17:02Thank you, Eva.
00:17:03Well, you could be driving around in a car like that
00:17:05had you not married that criminal waste manager.
00:17:09So married, huh?
00:17:11Is it serious?
00:17:13That's what marriage is.
00:17:14It's pretty serious.
00:17:16Wow.
00:17:17You must have rushed the time to night, huh?
00:17:20Makes sense, though.
00:17:21You not being a hot-dumny thing anymore.
00:17:24Dragging that kid around with no data.
00:17:27Yeah.
00:17:28A bullet dog, really.
00:17:30Meanwhile, you're climbing the Harrison Group ladder.
00:17:34That's right.
00:17:34I just bought this brand-new suit with my Christmas bonus.
00:17:39Wouldn't love a man in red.
00:17:42Sexy.
00:17:43Like Santa Claus.
00:17:44Would I sit on my lap?
00:17:46Don't touch me.
00:17:48Oh, so entitled.
00:17:50Williams, a successful man of taste, not waste.
00:17:54And yet, for some reason, he's willing to overlook your baggage.
00:17:58I mean, look at that car.
00:18:01Did your husband afford anything even close to that?
00:18:04In the sink of the life, I can give you a piper with all my Harrison Group money.
00:18:08Get you nobody, husband.
00:18:10And marry me instead.
00:18:12I wouldn't marry you if you were the last man on birth.
00:18:20My mom would never marry.
00:18:22She already has love, and he's gonna kick your butt.
00:18:29Is that so?
00:18:30Well then, where is he?
00:18:33Because I don't see him.
00:18:35Does anyone see him?
00:18:38No.
00:18:39Just like I thought.
00:18:41Family lies just like mommy.
00:18:43That puts you on the Nihilists.
00:18:47And let me show you that it's not a change.
00:18:52Hey, mommy.
00:18:54Is it okay?
00:18:56She is.
00:18:57Oh my God.
00:18:58Let me take her into your past, okay?
00:19:00Come on.
00:19:01Let's go.
00:19:03What the hell's the matter with you?
00:19:06How dare you put your filthy hands on my daughter?
00:19:10Let me go.
00:19:11Now, why would I go and do a thing like that when I'm having such a good time?
00:19:17Let me go.
00:19:32Touch my wife again, and I will snap every finger that you've got.
00:19:40Max, you're king.
00:19:42How are you, sweetie?
00:19:46Where's Piper?
00:19:47William Hitter.
00:19:49I'm long down at Taker inside.
00:19:51Well, it looks like we have a real Grinch to dispose of.
00:19:54Well, well, well.
00:19:55It isn't a waste, Marjorie, I can't hear you so much about.
00:19:59That's right.
00:20:01Now, I'm about to take out the trash.
00:20:05Oh, Mr. and Mrs. Smith.
00:20:08It's an honor to meet you.
00:20:09I'm Max.
00:20:10Eva told us all about you.
00:20:12From New York, polite, handsome.
00:20:15Just like she said.
00:20:17Wow.
00:20:18He was an AI.
00:20:20See?
00:20:21He's real.
00:20:22And he's more of a man here than William who ever dreamed he'd be.
00:20:25You son of a bitch.
00:20:27You just ruined my suit.
00:20:28And watch how I get to drive that...
00:20:30That pristine automobile.
00:20:33That car?
00:20:34Oh, my God.
00:20:35That's worth more than a house.
00:20:38That car?
00:20:39It's all over the news when the CEO of the Harrison Group bought it.
00:20:44Wait.
00:20:45Are you?
00:20:50Like I said, I'm just Eva's husband.
00:20:54And that's all he needs to know.
00:20:56I'm not here to put on a show for anyone.
00:20:58You really are, Gregorio, aren't you?
00:21:00You stole it.
00:21:01That car belongs to the CEO of my company.
00:21:04Jesus.
00:21:05How did he get away with it?
00:21:06That's what I want to know.
00:21:08Enough, please.
00:21:11I'm just my daughter.
00:21:13She will never marry a girl.
00:21:17Max, be honest with me.
00:21:19Where did that car come from?
00:21:22I'm just a one-footed.
00:21:24Okay, what do you need when you make it three light times?
00:21:27Sir, you need a breath, man.
00:21:33All right, listen, I'm calling the cops.
00:21:34Oh, way ahead of you.
00:21:36Wait.
00:21:38What?
00:21:39Are you feeling nervous to me, Bob?
00:21:42Oh, well.
00:21:43Too late.
00:21:50Listen, I believe you.
00:21:53But how could Max afford a car like that?
00:21:58Mr. Smith, don't worry.
00:21:59It's my car.
00:22:00It's not stolen.
00:22:02Yeah?
00:22:03If it's yours, then prove it.
00:22:04The cops will be here in 15 minutes.
00:22:08Enjoy Christmas behind bars.
00:22:10Okay.
00:22:10I'll prove that it's mine.
00:22:12But then you have to get lost.
00:22:14And never show your face around my wife or child again.
00:22:17Oh, so you're a tough guy, huh?
00:22:19Well, I hope they serve eggnog in prison.
00:22:22Loser.
00:22:22Say one more word, and I'll give him a real reason to take me in.
00:22:28Jesus.
00:22:28Maybe he is a crime boss.
00:22:30He's kind of sexy, though.
00:22:34Here.
00:22:35Title and proof of ownership.
00:22:45Mr. Harrison?
00:22:50Mr. Harrison?
00:22:51Mr. Harrison?
00:22:55Just play along.
00:22:58Merry Christmas, Willie.
00:22:59Now get the fuck out of here.
00:23:01Before I kick your ass all the way up to the North Pole.
00:23:04Yes, sir.
00:23:05I'm so sorry, sir.
00:23:15I'm so sorry, sir.
00:23:19Oh, that William.
00:23:22What a jerk, huh?
00:23:24You fooled me.
00:23:25What can I say?
00:23:26Let's not let this little misunderstanding ruin the holidays.
00:23:30Oh, now you don't want to ruin Christmas?
00:23:32Oh, come on, you know.
00:23:33We were just looking out for you.
00:23:35Oh, praise for just Mr. Harrison.
00:23:38You know, my youngest son is graduating soon.
00:23:41Do you think that you could help him get us open the door?
00:23:45A job at the Harrison Group, even in the mail room, would open doors.
00:23:50We are family, aren't we?
00:23:51Family takes care of each other.
00:23:55If you guys want a job at the Harrison Group, you can put in an application like everyone
00:23:59else's.
00:23:59Abigail, come on.
00:24:01Talk to her for us.
00:24:03Didn't you just say that my daughter was undateable?
00:24:06Yeah.
00:24:07I think you did take care of your own issues first.
00:24:10My daughter is just far too busy for your best life for my new son.
00:24:15Come on, guys.
00:24:17Let's go in.
00:24:17Welcome to the family.
00:24:22Welcome.
00:24:27This is your fault, Pam.
00:24:30You can't tell the difference between AI and reality.
00:24:33My fault.
00:24:34You were the one who was pushing her onto that worm, will you?
00:24:38Oh!
00:24:48Hey, how do you have that car?
00:24:50And how do you know the CEO of Harrison Group?
00:24:52And how old are you?
00:24:53I told you.
00:24:54I work for Harrison Group, remember?
00:24:56I have a friend in high places.
00:24:58A friend who just hands you keys to million-dollar, one-of-a-kind luxury cars?
00:25:03Yes.
00:25:04It's the season of giving.
00:25:06He knows people.
00:25:07Has connections.
00:25:08He's a big deal kind of guy.
00:25:11You're a crime boss, aren't you?
00:25:13Yeah, you best not forget it.
00:25:14The bish...
00:25:15Oh, my God, just don't pull your cover.
00:25:19Dad!
00:25:19Mom!
00:25:21Thank you so much for letting Max and I stay in your home for more, honey.
00:25:24We're just so happy that you found such a handsome, strong, good luck with that.
00:25:31I think they get it, honey.
00:25:35Uh, how's Piper?
00:25:36Oh, she's fine.
00:25:38Well, you guys just get so, and we will go check on her.
00:25:41And if your mom takes a cold shower, we'll come back and finish decorating the tree.
00:25:47Can we...
00:25:47See you in a bit?
00:25:49Can we?
00:25:49What are you doing?
00:25:52Okay.
00:25:55Hey, was that not a, uh, reach of contra?
00:26:00Relax.
00:26:01It was just a hug.
00:26:04Ugh.
00:26:06We just got here, and I'm already exhausted.
00:26:09You'll be okay.
00:26:10It's just one week.
00:26:11Only now.
00:26:12Well, I would, but...
00:26:13I need to get paid.
00:26:19What are you doing?
00:26:22That's weird.
00:26:23They were so lovely to be just a second ago.
00:26:26I don't know.
00:26:26Something just smells off.
00:26:28This is ridiculous.
00:26:30I mean, what do you want them to do?
00:26:32They don't promise to food?
00:26:34I'll see you.
00:26:37Later.
00:26:44Here we go.
00:26:47Piper is all tucked in, honey.
00:26:49Everything looks amazing, and happy holidays.
00:26:52To the newest member of our family, Max.
00:26:55Oh.
00:26:56Welcome.
00:26:58Cheers.
00:26:58Thank you, Mrs. Smith.
00:27:00Looks great.
00:27:01Oh, just call me mom, honey.
00:27:02I had no idea what you liked, so I just looked up a little bit of everything.
00:27:07But we all know what Eva's favorite Christmas dish is, right?
00:27:12Oh, no.
00:27:13Mom's testing him.
00:27:14She's trying to see if he's legit.
00:27:16You mean to tell me you two are married, and you don't even know my baby girl's favorite food?
00:27:23Ow.
00:27:24Eva, sweetie.
00:27:26Kicking my foot.
00:27:27Oh, sorry, Mom.
00:27:29Oh, jeez.
00:27:32It's okay.
00:27:33Look, Mom, of course he knows it.
00:27:35I would like to hear Max say it.
00:27:50Twelve pumpkin pies.
00:27:51Did I hear this right?
00:27:52The best kind.
00:27:55Well, of course.
00:27:56It's pumpkin pie.
00:27:58See?
00:27:59Are you happy now?
00:28:01That's good, but something still falls off.
00:28:04Mom, don't make it weird, okay?
00:28:06We had a whirlwind romance, and we eloped before we got to know everything about each other.
00:28:12But our marriage is real.
00:28:15I guess your mom was just watching some of those real short shows.
00:28:18Ah, now those are quality.
00:28:22Okay, well, then answer this.
00:28:25Where's your wedding ring, Eva?
00:28:29Where's your wedding ring, Eva?
00:28:33I knew it was a good idea to pick this up.
00:28:36Well, um, it's...
00:28:39Silly face.
00:28:40Dropped it outside on the sidewalk.
00:28:42Luckily, I was there to pick it up for her.
00:28:45Silly face.
00:28:46I said, I am not paying extra for this.
00:28:50Consider it a custom sale.
00:28:52You're losers.
00:28:54Oh, that's a place.
00:28:56You can afford this on a waste manager's salary?
00:28:58Well, believe it or not, Miss Smith, there is a lot of garbage out there.
00:29:02And I'm not just talking about William.
00:29:04Oh, that's a good idea.
00:29:06Oh, that's a good idea.
00:29:08So, come on, guys.
00:29:09Let's eat.
00:29:11Oh, that's a good idea.
00:29:23And this is where y'all will be staying.
00:29:26I have another room set up for Piper.
00:29:29Nice and festive for you.
00:29:31No complications.
00:29:33Sorry, honey.
00:29:34Uh, Mom, you know what?
00:29:36I should stay with Piper tonight.
00:29:38Oh, honey.
00:29:39Millie Weds shouldn't sleep apart.
00:29:42Oh, I just remembered.
00:29:44The city's turning the water off at 10.
00:29:46Something about water conservation.
00:29:48That means you have 15 minutes to shower.
00:29:5015 minutes?
00:29:53Honey, it's no big deal.
00:29:54Just shower together.
00:29:57Shower together?
00:30:01Just shower together.
00:30:03Okay, you guys.
00:30:04Have a good night, okay?
00:30:09You heard it.
00:30:13Shower together.
00:30:13Shower together.
00:30:31Oh, I can't take a shower with your clothes on.
00:30:38Come on, we're wasting time.
00:30:39I have 15 minutes.
00:30:40Nice try.
00:30:41I am not showering with you.
00:30:43All right, suit yourself.
00:30:44Or move for me in there.
00:30:46Not that I'll be here first.
00:31:04Come on, Max.
00:31:06Get out of the way.
00:31:08You could be nothing physical.
00:31:10You're the one with the dirty thoughts away.
00:31:13I won't touch you unless you say you want me to.
00:31:19It doesn't cost me a shot.
00:31:21I know.
00:31:23I know.
00:31:30In your dreams.
00:31:33Free to join me.
00:31:34I know.
00:31:54If you keep staring at my ass, you're not going to have my shower water.
00:31:57You bitch.
00:31:59Why aren't you getting in?
00:32:01Pray you'll call for me.
00:32:03It's you who has to worry about resisting me.
00:32:06Oh yeah?
00:32:07Good.
00:32:20Holy man.
00:32:24I'm sorry.
00:32:27I'm sorry.
00:32:27I'm sorry.
00:32:28I'm sorry.
00:32:29I'll say.
00:32:30What happened to all that cool guy confidence?
00:32:34So I'll say a few people.
00:32:36Maybe.
00:32:38Maybe.
00:32:39That was hell.
00:32:49Or maybe we should.
00:32:51God, that's such a good kisser.
00:32:54Why does this feel so...
00:32:57Familiar?
00:33:03Oh, we're so...
00:33:05Yes.
00:33:14Max, we did not do this.
00:33:16What? I didn't mean to cross any...
00:33:19It's not you, Max.
00:33:20It's us.
00:33:21It's this.
00:33:21This is all it asks.
00:33:23Let's not make it more complicated than it is.
00:33:25You're right.
00:33:28I'm sorry.
00:33:29You need to be sorry.
00:33:31Are you just...
00:33:40That birthmark.
00:33:46What is that?
00:33:48It's him.
00:33:49The man from New Year's.
00:33:50Is...
00:33:51Is he...
00:33:52Piper's father?
00:33:56Why are you acting?
00:34:00Oh my god.
00:34:01Max is Piper's father.
00:34:04Are you okay?
00:34:05Yeah, I...
00:34:07I just, um...
00:34:08I just caught my head in it.
00:34:10I think I just need a few more minutes.
00:34:11Alone.
00:34:14Of course.
00:34:18We have a daughter together.
00:34:20Oh my god.
00:34:21What do I do?
00:34:28I'm gonna sleep on the floor.
00:34:30You can take the bed.
00:34:32Thanks.
00:34:35Hey.
00:34:37Are you sure you're okay?
00:34:39Look, fake marriage aside,
00:34:41I'm your husband for the next few days.
00:34:43So if there's something you need,
00:34:44I can help.
00:34:46I wanna help.
00:34:48He's Piper's father.
00:34:49He has a right to know.
00:34:52Um...
00:34:53Max...
00:34:55How would you feel if you found out you had a kid?
00:35:02A child?
00:35:03No, no, no.
00:35:04That's...
00:35:05That's impossible.
00:35:06I'm...
00:35:07Very...
00:35:07Careful.
00:35:09Mostly.
00:35:11I just mean I'm not the type of guy to sleep around.
00:35:14Family to me is...
00:35:15A big commitment.
00:35:16And...
00:35:17I don't want any loose ends.
00:35:19You know?
00:35:20Right.
00:35:22You wouldn't want a kid tying him down?
00:35:24I shouldn't tell him about Piper.
00:35:27Why do you ask?
00:35:29No reason.
00:35:30Just...
00:35:31Just curious.
00:35:32I...
00:35:33I feel like you're...
00:35:34Going somewhere with us.
00:35:36What?
00:35:37No.
00:35:38Well then...
00:35:39Can I ask you a question?
00:35:42Shoot?
00:35:48Where did you get these?
00:35:49And how did you know my exact size?
00:35:52I...
00:35:52Did not get those.
00:35:54I don't know where those came from.
00:35:55Are you sure?
00:35:56You're just now trying to...
00:35:58Break the contract?
00:36:01Oh my god.
00:36:02Oh my god.
00:36:03Oh my god.
00:36:04Oh my god.
00:36:05Oh my god.
00:36:05Oh my god.
00:36:06Oh my god.
00:36:15Oh my god.
00:36:24Just a second.
00:36:26Come in.
00:36:28Hey, hon.
00:36:30Oh, sorry for interrupting, but Piper is asking for a bedtime story before I tuck her in.
00:36:36You need to take this one, Dad?
00:36:38I'm kind of in the middle of something.
00:36:40I can see that.
00:36:42Well, why don't I read it to her?
00:36:44I mean, if you don't mind.
00:36:46What?
00:36:47I don't want.
00:36:48You know what?
00:36:48Just put her shirt on.
00:36:50I'm going to go get her.
00:36:51Piper!
00:36:52Here comes Grandpa!
00:36:56He sprang to his sleigh, to his team gave a whistle, and away they all flew, like the down of
00:37:02a thistle.
00:37:03But I heard him exclaim, as he drove out of sight, Merry Christmas to all, and to all, a good
00:37:12night.
00:37:15If Piper knew he was her real dad, she'd be over the moon.
00:37:19Good night, Piper.
00:37:24Is her dad still around?
00:37:26Yeah, but he doesn't know it, because you're her dad.
00:37:31Uh, no.
00:37:32That man has no idea what a treasure he's missing on.
00:37:40Do you really think so?
00:37:42From the bottom of my heart?
00:37:45Maybe I should tell him.
00:37:47He deserves to know.
00:37:54Max.
00:37:58You are Piper's father.
00:38:00goodью, or what?
00:38:07How about a ein penser hit at your heart?
00:38:12I'm tired, Azee.
00:38:14I'm tired, after he tags.
00:38:15HIGHüss,שר� by CSUNYKE.
00:38:16So wait, let's know how it's won and be welcomed at!
00:38:16No question about it,
00:38:19I've been very entwrecked at the whole time, it's our trip home.
00:38:20It's our trip to the whole passion of your family, and I lose sight of everything, doesn't matter.
00:38:23Oh no, because, no matter where we can be.
00:38:25I love it, we could go there!
00:38:27You doin' quick hvalejly, with an honor, you burn my name on.
00:38:34Where's Piper?
00:38:36She must have snuck off while we were asleep.
00:38:55God, he said she could kiss her.
00:39:05Just gonna kiss and run?
00:39:07Not my wife.
00:39:12Yeah, this.
00:39:15I remember this.
00:39:26Good morning, you two love bugs.
00:39:29How was your stay at Sato-Smith?
00:39:33Good morning, Smith.
00:39:34It was great.
00:39:36Wonderful.
00:39:37Well, it's about to get even better.
00:39:41Oh, no.
00:39:42What is that?
00:39:43Sardines and saltines.
00:39:45It's a Smith family classic.
00:39:47It was my grand-grand's favorite during wartime.
00:39:50Don't be shy.
00:39:51Go ahead, grab a handful.
00:39:53Max, you don't have to.
00:39:55No, no, it's okay.
00:39:56It's a Smith family staple.
00:39:59It's over there.
00:40:18Good?
00:40:20Good.
00:40:22Good.
00:40:24Oh, you two better get dressed.
00:40:26You're going to see Aunt Miranda.
00:40:29Can I get a glass of water, please?
00:40:32That means there's no escaping Aunt Miranda and her brood this year.
00:40:36What's the deal with them?
00:40:38Every year, Aunt Miranda bullies Piper and I.
00:40:40Says Piper's a fatherless brat, I'm...
00:40:45Hey, don't worry. I'll protect you and Piper.
00:40:50Better have Sam on standby tonight, just in case.
00:40:55Well, looks like it's time to get dressed up then.
00:41:09Wait, that earring.
00:41:12Wait, that earring.
00:41:14You like it?
00:41:15I was so bummed when I lost the match you won years ago.
00:41:18Did you lose it seven years ago?
00:41:20Well, I don't really remember the details, but luckily I was able to find a new pair.
00:41:27Right.
00:41:28It's just a common earring.
00:41:30Anyone can have it.
00:41:31Maybe I'm reading too much into it.
00:41:33She can't be the woman from seven years ago.
00:41:37So, Ava and Piper still aren't here.
00:41:42But derring said that Ava got married.
00:41:45What kind of man could she possibly have landed?
00:41:49An aging single mom.
00:41:51Slim pickings.
00:41:53I heard he's in waste management.
00:41:55That explains it.
00:41:57She's probably too embarrassed to show up.
00:42:00No, please, Miranda.
00:42:01Look, Ava is your niece.
00:42:03Oh, come on, Grandpa.
00:42:05Everyone knows Ava had a kid with a random one-night stand.
00:42:09Her track record speaks for itself.
00:42:11Exactly.
00:42:12Not like my Sierra.
00:42:13Married to a legal advisor for Harrison Group.
00:42:19Oh, you're here.
00:42:21Merry Christmas, everybody.
00:42:28Merry Christmas, everybody.
00:42:29Merry Christmas.
00:42:32You must be Grandpa Harold.
00:42:33I am.
00:42:35I'm Ava's husband.
00:42:36I'm Max.
00:42:37Pleasure to meet you.
00:42:37Welcome.
00:42:38You're Ava's husband.
00:42:41But you are gorgeous.
00:42:45But nice to miss you.
00:42:47Look at you two.
00:42:48You look like you just stepped out of a movie.
00:42:50Merry Christmas, Grandpa.
00:42:52Merry Christmas.
00:42:53This is for Max tonight.
00:42:55Oh, my goodness.
00:42:56I bet you need that.
00:42:57Let me grab that for you, Daddy.
00:43:00Oops.
00:43:01Oh, my bad.
00:43:02Oh, a homemade gift.
00:43:04How thrifty.
00:43:06Not all kissing about the price tag.
00:43:09Mommy's right, you mean old hat.
00:43:11You little.
00:43:14You are not laid ahead on my daughter.
00:43:17We will lose yours.
00:43:19Oh, I think you broke my wrist.
00:43:22Look what you just did to my mother.
00:43:24My husband is Harrison Group's top legal advisor.
00:43:27He could ruin your butt.
00:43:41Hi, are you okay?
00:43:44I'm fine.
00:43:44I'm just a light time.
00:43:45It's okay.
00:43:47It's okay.
00:43:49What are you?
00:43:52Don't you dare disrespect my husband.
00:43:55Did you just slap me?
00:43:57Next time, it'll be a closed fist.
00:43:59You're a fucking psycho.
00:44:01You know what, Sierra?
00:44:01I can take your little insults, but leave my family out of this.
00:44:07You're family.
00:44:08She needs me.
00:44:14You okay, honey?
00:44:15Do I look okay to you, dumbass?
00:44:18Do something.
00:44:19You don't know who you're messing with.
00:44:21I've got the full weight of the Harrison Group behind me.
00:44:24Oh, wow.
00:44:25I'm sure the CEO would love to hear that you're using his company's name to bully people.
00:44:30Look, you'd have any idea how a CEO thinks.
00:44:33Let's call him.
00:44:34I'm sure he'd be more than happy to be on my side.
00:44:38Please.
00:44:38Who do you think you are?
00:44:41Need up.
00:44:43There will be no arguing during Christmas.
00:44:46Fine, Dad.
00:44:48Let it go, Nathan.
00:44:50They're just jealous.
00:44:53For grandpa's sake, I'll let you off easy.
00:44:55I think you owe Nathan a thank you.
00:44:59I think you owe me a thank you for slapping some sense into you.
00:45:03Do you want me to get the other key?
00:45:04All right, that's enough.
00:45:06Everyone come inside and sit down.
00:45:29Is this a joke?
00:45:31Can you please pass me some food?
00:45:33Hold it.
00:45:34We said you could eat anything else.
00:45:37My husband and I paid for this feast.
00:45:42My husband and I paid for this feast.
00:45:46King crab, fresh from Alaska, and grass-fed white hue.
00:45:51Three times the price, 50 times the flavor.
00:45:55And you don't get a single bite.
00:45:57It's just petty.
00:45:58Maybe so.
00:46:00But gourmet food isn't meant for bottom feeders.
00:46:04Fine.
00:46:05Then we won't stay and eat with you.
00:46:08Come on, let's go.
00:46:09No, no.
00:46:10Don't you dare leave our family dinner.
00:46:13Grandpa, I'm sorry, but they're treating us like...
00:46:16I know, dear.
00:46:17I just want to have our family together.
00:46:20Fine.
00:46:21We'll let the strays sit and eat with us.
00:46:24What a stray damn bitch.
00:46:25What was that?
00:46:29I just want to have our family together.
00:46:32Fine.
00:46:33We'll stay.
00:46:35Can I have a little nipple?
00:46:37It's okay, sweetie.
00:46:38We'll get something right after.
00:46:40Like drive-thru?
00:46:42I hope you enjoy food poisoning.
00:46:45That will be a particularly memorable Christmas present.
00:46:50No shame.
00:46:51Ow.
00:46:52Please, are you okay?
00:46:54That's fine.
00:46:55You hit my child.
00:46:57You're fucking crazy.
00:46:58Well, if you teach her some manners, maybe I wouldn't have to.
00:47:05Don't worry, baby.
00:47:07I'll handle it.
00:47:10Don't worry, baby.
00:47:11I'll handle it.
00:47:15Hi, Bert.
00:47:17Sweetie, are you ready to try the best food you've ever had in your life?
00:47:23Okay, sweetheart.
00:47:24Give me two minutes and one phone call.
00:47:26Because if you have a chef on speed dial...
00:47:30Actually, I do.
00:47:32He's such a liar.
00:47:33This ought to be hilarious.
00:47:35Oh, it will be.
00:47:39Sam.
00:47:40Yeah, send the troops and bring that keen crab from Antarctica.
00:47:45I'm already on my way.
00:47:49Bring that keen crab from Antarctica.
00:47:52I'm already on my way.
00:47:55You hear this guy?
00:47:56He wants the best keen crab in the world.
00:47:59From Antarctica.
00:48:01Now I get why you married him, Eva.
00:48:04His silly delusions are just adorable.
00:48:07Thanks.
00:48:08What are you doing?
00:48:09Don't worry about it, sweetheart.
00:48:10Santa's already on this way.
00:48:13Actually...
00:48:13Five...
00:48:15Four...
00:48:17Three...
00:48:18Two...
00:48:19One...
00:48:21One...
00:48:23One...
00:48:30There's no way.
00:48:36How did you hold us off?
00:48:38His name is like family.
00:48:39I thought I'd introduce you to.
00:48:41Thanks, boss.
00:48:43Boss?
00:48:44Eva's always been genuine with me.
00:48:46Maybe it's time to know who I really am.
00:48:48Eva, I think it's time you actually know the truth.
00:48:52I'm Maximus Harrison.
00:48:56You're...
00:48:56CEO?
00:48:58Of Harrison Group?
00:48:59Mm-hmm.
00:49:02Come on.
00:49:04You can stop kidding around.
00:49:07You're a CEO.
00:49:08Why would you be here?
00:49:09I didn't mean my husband.
00:49:11I actually am the CEO.
00:49:13Come on.
00:49:13You can stop the charade.
00:49:15Okay, this is just another favor from that big, big friend, isn't it?
00:49:18Eva?
00:49:19I'm not pretending.
00:49:21Mr. Harrison, the Antarctic king crab, as you requested.
00:49:35How is this possible?
00:49:37This loser brings Antarctic king crab and has his own personal chef?
00:49:43Who are you?
00:49:45I told you.
00:49:46Eva's husband.
00:49:48That chef called him Mr. Harrison.
00:49:51But...
00:49:51No.
00:49:52Hold on.
00:49:54You're the actual CEO of the Harrison Group?
00:49:58You're...
00:49:59You're worth more than some whole countries.
00:50:01Hm.
00:50:02Some of the small ones.
00:50:04I mean, you know that.
00:50:06You work for me.
00:50:07Oh, God.
00:50:08I just looked at my own boss.
00:50:10I'm finished.
00:50:16Oh, God.
00:50:18I just looked at my own boss.
00:50:19I'm finished.
00:50:21Didn't think Max would commit this hard.
00:50:23Pretending that his CEO is a hell of a move.
00:50:26Worth every penny I'm paying him.
00:50:27For tonight, you're she-sense.
00:50:30And with that, you're Karina.
00:50:33You're fired.
00:50:34I'm fired?
00:50:35Sam?
00:50:40You're fired?
00:50:41God.
00:50:42I can't be fired!
00:50:44What?
00:50:46Mr. Harrison, please.
00:50:47You can have as much crab as you want.
00:50:49Please.
00:50:50Mr. Harrison, I'll do anything.
00:50:52Guys.
00:50:53I got the trash.
00:51:00And you.
00:51:01Oh, me?
00:51:03Mr. Harrison, come on.
00:51:05That was a Christmas joke.
00:51:06A family tradition.
00:51:08Yeah, well, there's a new family tradition.
00:51:11Sam?
00:51:15What are you doing with the items?
00:51:19Happy.
00:51:23Very precious.
00:51:27I want to do something.
00:51:30You kind of deserve that.
00:51:32I'm leaving.
00:51:34I'm leaving.
00:51:35I'm getting her family.
00:51:42Come on, sweetie.
00:51:43Daddy had this crab line just for you.
00:51:46Eat as much as you want.
00:51:47Yes, daddy.
00:51:51I am so sorry I ruined your Christmas.
00:51:54I just couldn't take them treating you like that.
00:51:56Honestly?
00:51:58This is the best Christmas I've ever had.
00:52:00Well, if you want, we can have many more.
00:52:02Just like this.
00:52:04Does he really mean that?
00:52:06Or is he just playing the part?
00:52:08I can't tell.
00:52:09And that terrifies me.
00:52:16Merry Christmas, Ms. Harrison.
00:52:17I brought you a gift.
00:52:19Here's the fraternity test between the boss and that little girl.
00:52:21Oh.
00:52:26Oh, this is wonderful.
00:52:30Sam, I have a granddaughter.
00:52:33Tell me everything.
00:52:35Mrs. Bismuth, single mother, small-town gal,
00:52:38didn't finish high school, currently works in retail.
00:52:40Oh, Maximus, I thought I raised you better.
00:52:44A high school dropout?
00:52:46In the Harrison family?
00:52:49Not a chance.
00:52:53She is clearly unfit to raise my granddaughter.
00:52:57Maximus seems to like her.
00:52:58Silence.
00:52:59Get me the address where she works.
00:53:01It's Happy Hills on Broadway.
00:53:03That's nice.
00:53:04We own that one.
00:53:06Good work.
00:53:08That's a stupid hat.
00:53:20Thanks.
00:53:21So your dad insisted that I try this one.
00:53:23I just didn't save him for 20 years.
00:53:27Sounds like he's happy with his new son-in-law.
00:53:29Yeah, how about you?
00:53:34Me?
00:53:34Are you happy with your new husband?
00:53:42Eva.
00:53:54What birthmark?
00:53:56Family to me is a big commitment,
00:53:58and I don't want any loose ends, you know?
00:54:02Maximus, there's so much we don't know.
00:54:04So much we're not telling each other.
00:54:08No feelings, no complications.
00:54:10That's what we agreed upon.
00:54:11Yeah, I didn't sign a contract.
00:54:14Max.
00:54:15Yeah, I guess you're right.
00:54:18It's cold.
00:54:20Maybe I'll go grab some more firewood.
00:54:24Max.
00:54:24Max, I need to tell you something.
00:54:29It's something important.
00:54:31What's gotten into her?
00:54:33Is she hiding something?
00:54:35Is this the part where you tell me there's no Santa?
00:54:39I haven't been completely honest with you.
00:54:44Piper is...
00:54:47Piper is...
00:54:48Mommy, Daddy, my hand hurts.
00:54:51Sweetie.
00:54:52Oh, my gosh.
00:54:53She's so small.
00:54:54Must have been when that witch smacked her with the fork earlier.
00:54:57Listen, you stay here with Daddy.
00:54:58Mommy's gonna go get her first date, okay?
00:55:02Come on, Piper.
00:55:06Okay, let me see.
00:55:11I promise I won't let anyone hurt you or Mommy again.
00:55:15But that's not true.
00:55:16You were leaving after Christmas, aren't you?
00:55:21Daddy!
00:55:22No!
00:55:23What?
00:55:30Don't you dare disrespect my husband.
00:55:35Well, maybe I don't have to leave.
00:55:39Well, maybe I don't have to leave.
00:55:41Really?
00:55:41Please stay, Daddy.
00:55:46You think it will start?
00:55:52I wouldn't worry about it.
00:55:54Scars make you look like a badass.
00:55:56I have one, too.
00:55:59Dad, I got that when I was about your age.
00:56:01I wish some punk came at me with a switchblade.
00:56:05I wish some punk came at me with a switchblade.
00:56:05No way.
00:56:07No.
00:56:07It was actually a cactus.
00:56:09But it's still cool.
00:56:12I have something like that on the back of my neck.
00:56:18Piper, how long have you had that?
00:56:20Well, my mom said I had that when I was born.
00:56:28And how old are you?
00:56:30Six.
00:56:31Six?
00:56:32That one night's man was about seven years ago.
00:56:34Okay, I found the first-aid kid.
00:56:37Eva, are you sure we haven't met before?
00:56:41What do I even say?
00:56:43And how do I explain it to Piper?
00:56:45Sorry, honey.
00:56:46This man's your dad, and he didn't know you existed until now.
00:56:50Um, yeah.
00:56:54Can I see your hands, sweetie?
00:56:56Eva.
00:57:01Hey, look.
00:57:06Piper is...
00:57:11Go on.
00:57:18There must be an emergency.
00:57:21Excuse me.
00:57:22Sorry.
00:57:23Excuse us.
00:57:30Mommy, are you okay?
00:57:32Yeah.
00:57:34Mommy's just realizing she's a coward.
00:57:37I don't even have the cuts to tell the truth.
00:57:42Why haven't you picked up my calls?
00:57:45I'm telling you, Max, that woman is manipulating you.
00:57:48She's a high school dropout.
00:57:51Doesn't even have a decent job.
00:57:53And she's only fit to raise my granddaughter.
00:57:55I'm your husband.
00:57:57Max, that man has no idea what a treasure.
00:58:02He's missing out on her.
00:58:06I'm sorry, Max.
00:58:07You can't know Piper's your daughter.
00:58:09Your mother would take her away.
00:58:11After Christmas, it's over.
00:58:15Eva?
00:58:17Maximus?
00:58:18Are you even listening to me?
00:58:20No, Mom, Mom.
00:58:21Listen, I'm sorry, okay?
00:58:23Eva's my wife, and I made up my mind.
00:58:25I'm not leaving her.
00:58:28I'm not leaving her.
00:58:29I'm not leaving her.
00:58:32Oh, my God.
00:58:34I'm not leaving her.
00:58:35You're out of me, then.
00:58:47Oh, good.
00:58:51This is for you, Grandma.
00:58:54Oh, you sure won't you.
00:58:57Thanks, Dad.
00:58:57I'll go out to you.
00:59:03Oh, happy birthday.
00:59:05Grandpa, rain win slow gears.
00:59:13Piper, do you want to go see your present?
00:59:15It's near the ramp by the train set.
00:59:17Hey, I'll do it.
00:59:18There's a song we sang.
00:59:19Hey, Grandma got run over by a reindeer.
00:59:23What are we got, guys?
00:59:23Welcome home from our house.
00:59:25Christmas Eve.
00:59:30You never told me.
00:59:34Have we met before?
00:59:39Have we met before?
00:59:42She's unfit to raise my granddaughter.
00:59:47I don't know what you're getting at.
00:59:50Eva, I have the same birthmark.
00:59:53Miss Piper.
01:00:02I don't know what you're talking about.
01:00:03Lots of people have birthmarks.
01:00:04They're very common.
01:00:06I feel so awful, but I can't lose my child.
01:00:09No matter how I feel about him.
01:00:13Maybe.
01:00:16Are you okay?
01:00:19Are the clogs the bad idea?
01:00:22I don't know.
01:00:24I'm fine.
01:00:27Um...
01:00:27Oh, I almost forgot.
01:00:31I got shoes.
01:00:33You got me a gift, too?
01:00:35Kiss the season.
01:00:37Okay.
01:00:51Close.
01:00:53Did you make these?
01:00:55Yeah.
01:00:56I know this is a fake marriage, but...
01:00:58It's Christmas.
01:01:00You've already done so much for me.
01:01:01I just wanted to tell you a little something for you.
01:01:04Okay.
01:01:06How do they feel?
01:01:07Warm, right?
01:01:09Yeah.
01:01:10Warm.
01:01:12Soft.
01:01:16Perfect.
01:01:20Thank you, Eva.
01:01:22I've never gotten anything this meaningful before.
01:01:26Really?
01:01:28Yeah, my mom.
01:01:29She partied all the time.
01:01:31And...
01:01:32I got gifts.
01:01:33Plenty of them, but...
01:01:35Um...
01:01:36I don't think she ever bought one herself.
01:01:39Nothing...
01:01:40Personal.
01:01:41You deserve it.
01:01:43You're a good guy.
01:01:44Yeah, that...
01:01:46Someday you'll find someone special to spend all your Christmases with.
01:01:53What if that day's today?
01:01:57What if I already found someone special?
01:02:02Right here.
01:02:28Mark, we can't...
01:02:31Do you want me to stop?
01:02:33You better tell me right now.
01:02:40Why don't you stop?
01:02:48No matter how many years pass, I still can't resist him.
01:03:03Angel, Angel, how are you there?
01:03:09Angel, how are you there?
01:03:11Angel, how are you there?
01:03:15I'm trying, I'm trying, I'm trying.
01:03:22Piper.
01:03:31Piper?
01:03:53Eva?
01:03:57Grandma, I'm up here!
01:04:12That was way too close.
01:04:14Yeah.
01:04:15We would have gotten on a naughty list.
01:04:20Sometimes it's fun to be naughty.
01:04:25Can I still unwrap my present?
01:04:30You still have to give me mine.
01:04:36Let me give it to you.
01:04:47Get me at you.
01:04:51Good to be wrong.
01:05:08You still don't like...
01:05:13that my
01:05:14Es...
01:05:16Just calm me, son.
01:05:21Hello?
01:05:22Hello, Eva Smith.
01:05:24I'm Max's mother.
01:05:26Name your price.
01:05:27What would it take for you to leave my son alone?
01:05:30What?
01:05:31We both know my son is way out of your league.
01:05:35Take the money, leave my granddaughter with us, and go.
01:05:39My son will find a better wife and a better mother for his child.
01:05:43Piper is my daughter, and no amount of money you offer could ever make me give her up.
01:05:48So you keep your money, and I'll leave on my own, but I am not handing Piper over to you.
01:05:55That's not a beautiful wife.
01:06:01You okay?
01:06:06We made it to Christmas.
01:06:10So I think it's best we go to shop our money.
01:06:13What are you talking about?
01:06:16It's over.
01:06:17It's not that hard to understand.
01:06:22Eva, wait!
01:06:26So last night meant nothing to you?
01:06:33Max, it's not real.
01:06:36None of it was real.
01:06:37So, this is just a goodbye.
01:06:42Didn't realize that was so disposable for you.
01:06:45Look.
01:06:47Last night, I let my guard down.
01:06:51But I'm a mother, and my choices affect Piper.
01:06:54And being with you can mess up everything between us.
01:06:57Just tell me what you need.
01:07:00I'll do whatever it takes to be a good husband, a good father.
01:07:04Just say the word.
01:07:11You don't get it.
01:07:13You don't get it.
01:07:21I think it's time back for I go back to you.
01:07:29I won't give up on us.
01:07:46Are we here?
01:07:48Yes.
01:07:49As much as I don't want us to be, we're back.
01:07:56Piper, sweetie, make up.
01:08:02How could you just walk away?
01:08:12Don't forget, you have to meet my mom.
01:08:14It's part of the agreement, too.
01:08:17Can I just pay you a little extra and skip it?
01:08:20You promised.
01:08:21Eva, I haven't asked you for much.
01:08:23Can you do this for me, please?
01:08:27All right, fine.
01:08:29One.
01:08:31Two days.
01:08:32I'll come pick you up.
01:08:34Don't need.
01:08:35Just tell me the address and let me get back.
01:08:42I know you and Mommy thought,
01:08:45but she still really likes you.
01:08:48So don't give up, okay, Daddy?
01:08:50Thank you, sweetie.
01:08:52If there's one thing you should know about your daddy,
01:08:54I always fight for the ones I love.
01:09:16He was meeting my mother today.
01:09:18Time to finally explore the truth.
01:09:21Boss?
01:09:23Boss?
01:09:27Lady and gentlemen, I am so sorry.
01:09:30I need to go and back my family.
01:09:33Family?
01:09:34Boss, you okay?
01:09:35Never better.
01:09:39Go get her, Max.
01:09:45Oh, there he is, Max.
01:09:48Maximus, darling.
01:09:50I have some prospects for you.
01:09:52Nice high society girls from the city.
01:09:58Oh.
01:10:00I told you.
01:10:01I already found the woman I love.
01:10:05What?
01:10:09Maximus, stop this.
01:10:11That evil woman is scamming you, son.
01:10:15Tell me what kind of woman you want,
01:10:18and I'll find you another.
01:10:19You are heir to the Harrison dynasty.
01:10:22No, I'm not.
01:10:25Oh.
01:10:26I work in waste management,
01:10:28and I'm a secret crime boss.
01:10:30I'm Eva's husband,
01:10:32and I'm a father.
01:10:35What?
01:10:50That's her.
01:10:51The woman who got my son head over heels.
01:10:56Hi.
01:10:57Welcome in.
01:10:58Can I help you find something?
01:11:00I want to try those.
01:11:04Awesome.
01:11:05I'll get them for you right away.
01:11:07Are you sure you wouldn't want something more sensible?
01:11:13No, no, no.
01:11:15I know what I want.
01:11:16Five, seven.
01:11:19Oh, baby can't even walk,
01:11:21but she wants $3,000 heels.
01:11:23Come on.
01:11:24She wants the white shoes.
01:11:30Ignore her.
01:11:32She's just grumpy over the holidays.
01:11:33Here, let me help you.
01:11:35Come on.
01:11:39She seems kind.
01:11:46I shouldn't be that impressed.
01:11:48She's just doing her job.
01:11:52How do you feel?
01:11:53Well, I love the style.
01:11:55But it's too small.
01:11:57I think I need to size up.
01:11:59Maybe my feet are still growing.
01:12:04Right away.
01:12:05I'll be right back.
01:12:06She's not only kind.
01:12:08She's patient.
01:12:09Is that wrong about her?
01:12:26Are you only here, Becker?
01:12:30Well, who gives a shit?
01:12:32Well, who gives a shit?
01:12:32She can't walk.
01:12:36That's just pure evil.
01:12:40Oh, come on, St. Eva.
01:12:43She's in a wheelchair.
01:12:45Who cares?
01:12:46It's the last pair.
01:12:47I get paid commission.
01:12:54I'm not doing that, Vanessa.
01:13:08I'm not doing that, Vanessa.
01:13:17I'm your manager.
01:13:23Sell the old Biddy the shoes or you're fired.
01:13:33Did I stutter?
01:13:38You don't have to fire me.
01:13:42I quit.
01:13:48I don't work here anymore.
01:13:51Listen, don't buy the shoes.
01:13:54They're broken.
01:13:55Spend your heart and money in spirit, okay?
01:13:56You're a good person, after all.
01:14:00Looks like I misjudged you.
01:14:03I'm sorry?
01:14:06Why are you still here, Eva?
01:14:08Get out!
01:14:15You're not disabled?
01:14:16Selling broken heel to someone you thought was handicapped?
01:14:21Absolutely shameful.
01:14:23Who are you?
01:14:24I am the chairwoman of the Harrison Group, and the owner of the store.
01:14:32You're Eleanor Harrison, mother of the CEO?
01:14:36I am.
01:14:36And you, my dear, are fired.
01:14:41What did I do?
01:14:44You are a good person.
01:14:47From now on, this store is yours to run.
01:14:53Are you serious?
01:14:57Are you serious?
01:14:57That's right.
01:14:59Don't be nervous, child.
01:15:01You are professional, responsible, far better than that two-bit manager.
01:15:10You, out!
01:15:13I'll leave.
01:15:16I'm leaving.
01:15:19I, I, I feel like I'm dreaming.
01:15:23No, don't worry.
01:15:26You're getting a promotion.
01:15:28You deserve it, my dear.
01:15:33First assignment?
01:15:34I want that row, and that row, and the entire display case.
01:15:41Pack it all up and bring it to my house.
01:15:44Okay.
01:15:48Once we're home, I'll tell her I'm her mother-in-law.
01:15:51I can't wait to finally meet my granddaughter.
01:16:01She's the mother of CEO.
01:16:03Of course she lives like this.
01:16:15Mrs. Harrison?
01:16:16I'm here with your delivery.
01:16:21Mrs. Harrison?
01:16:21Lass?
01:16:22Eva?
01:16:24What are you doing here?
01:16:26I, uh...
01:16:27There you are, Eva!
01:16:30Wonderful we can finally meet each other properly.
01:16:33My new daughter-in-law.
01:16:37What are you talking about?
01:16:41It's amazing that you are the CEO of Harrison.
01:16:46Well, I tried to tell you, but...
01:16:47Stop.
01:16:49And you...
01:16:50You lied to me as a store.
01:16:53You were both just testing me?
01:16:56Is this some sick game rich people play?
01:16:58I'm sorry, Eva.
01:16:59I thought you might be using my son just after his money.
01:17:03But I was wrong.
01:17:05Eva, please.
01:17:05I don't deserve to be treated like this.
01:17:08And every working-class girl is after your money.
01:17:11Did you think that of me?
01:17:13It's not like that, dear.
01:17:15Eva, what are you talking about?
01:17:18Mom, what did you do?
01:17:20I was just trying to get the two of you back together.
01:17:23We're not together.
01:17:25And I can't love something that was never real.
01:17:32You horrible mistake.
01:17:35What are you waiting for, son?
01:17:36Bless her.
01:17:41Eva, let me go.
01:17:43I swear, it's not what you think.
01:17:45Let me come from two completely different worlds.
01:17:47Stop pretending like you care.
01:17:48I'm not pretending.
01:17:49Hey, I can't fake what we have.
01:17:51In everything I've done for you, and Piper, this is real.
01:17:59Touch my wife again, and I will snap every finger that you've got.
01:18:04Max, the king.
01:18:05God, you unkind.
01:18:07King, listen.
01:18:10I'll do whatever it takes to be a good husband, a good father.
01:18:14Just be the word.
01:18:18See?
01:18:20Stop fighting.
01:18:24We belong together.
01:18:26You're wrong.
01:18:28Wrong about what?
01:18:30That you care?
01:18:32Or we belong together?
01:18:33Look, I already told you.
01:18:35We're in two completely different worlds.
01:18:37Now, I held up my end of the deal, and I met your mother, like we discussed.
01:18:42Now, I'm a fake divorce from my fake cousin.
01:18:47Eva!
01:18:50Eva!
01:18:53I'm sorry, Maximus.
01:18:55Walking away is the only choice I have.
01:19:04Help!
01:19:06Are you okay, Mommy?
01:19:08Yeah, sweetie, I'm fine.
01:19:10Come here.
01:19:19No, you're not fine.
01:19:20What's that?
01:19:23I'm okay, sweetie.
01:19:27I miss Daddy, too.
01:19:32I want Max to be my real Daddy.
01:19:37Don't you want to be with him?
01:19:40Don't you want to be with him?
01:19:42You're right.
01:19:44What am I doing?
01:19:45Running like a coward?
01:19:48I've always taught you to be brave.
01:19:51I've always taught you to be brave.
01:19:51Now it's time for Mommy to be brave, too.
01:19:54I believe in you.
01:19:56What are you going to do, Mommy?
01:19:58I know exactly what to say to me.
01:20:00I know exactly what to say to him.
01:20:03Maximus deserves to know how Bert is his daughter.
01:20:13Enough sulking.
01:20:15Go get your wife and my grandbaby back.
01:20:18Don't you think I want to?
01:20:21She doesn't want me.
01:20:23I didn't raise you to give up.
01:20:25Your daughter is still out there.
01:20:26You can't abandon her.
01:20:28Mom, you don't get it.
01:20:30I made a deal with Eva to play my wife.
01:20:33And Piper, she was an added bonus.
01:20:37What are you talking about?
01:20:39I already ran a DNA test.
01:20:42Piper is your daughter.
01:20:45What?
01:20:46See for yourself.
01:20:53That's right.
01:20:55Seven years ago.
01:20:57In years, that woman was evil.
01:21:09Eva?
01:21:11Hey.
01:21:13Daddy!
01:21:15Daddy!
01:21:17Piper!
01:21:19I missed you so much, you know.
01:21:27You came back.
01:21:32I, uh...
01:21:34Don't forget to be brave, Mommy.
01:21:43I, uh...
01:21:44I'm scared.
01:21:46But I don't want to be scared anymore.
01:21:49Because what we have is real, and it's worth fighting for.
01:21:53Sweetheart, I have something to tell you.
01:21:57I have something to tell you, too.
01:22:01I push your daughter.
01:22:03You knew.
01:22:05My sweet granddaughter.
01:22:07Mama!
01:22:08Mama!
01:22:11I just found out for sure a few minutes ago.
01:22:14But you've known this whole time?
01:22:15I was scared.
01:22:17Okay, I didn't know if you were going to take her from me.
01:22:19I didn't know how you were feeling.
01:22:22How could you not know how I felt?
01:22:36I love you, Eva.
01:22:40I love you, Eva.
01:22:40I love you, too.
01:22:42I promise, for the rest of my life, I'm going to make it up to you.
01:22:47As long as we're together, it doesn't matter where we are.
01:23:01Will you marry me, Eva?
01:23:03For real this time.
01:23:05I'm going to marry you, Eva.
01:23:06Yes, of course.
01:23:08I'll marry you.
01:23:12Yes.
01:23:14Hi.
01:23:21Looks like yourself would be the next Christmas, and the Christmas after that, and forever.
01:23:28I won't have it any other way.
01:23:36What's that?
01:23:38Hey, Mom!
01:23:41Take me back!
01:23:44Oh, Mom!
01:23:45I'll show you dark!
01:23:48Oh!
01:23:49Looks like I have to take out the trash.
01:23:52Again.
01:23:55No?
01:23:56Not funny?
01:23:57Bye.
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