- 10 hours ago
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00:03You prick!
00:06You have been jealous of me ever since we were kids and I beat your ass in the science fair.
00:11You can't stand the idea that I might actually outshine you.
00:15Vivian, starting our product line isn't child's play. You don't even know what you're doing.
00:21You know what? I don't have time for this.
00:26Girl, you don't think they're gonna fuck in a conference room, do you?
00:30Bet you 50 bucks, do you?
00:36Oh, and you're such an expert. You've been riding on your daddy's coattails.
00:40You don't know innovation, you don't get viral marketing, you don't understand what a customer really wants.
00:50And you do?
00:51Look, a lot more goes into product distribution than a good idea. You're in way over your head.
00:59Why are you so close to me?
01:01You're the one that tripped me.
01:04Help me up!
01:09Vivian!
01:11Get off me!
01:13Right.
01:17Hey mom.
01:18Dad, what is it?
01:26I set you up with one of my friend's sons and he is New York City's most eligible bachelor.
01:32Mom, you picked the worst possible time. I'm in the middle of product lunch. I don't have time for your
01:38blind dates.
01:39Vivi, you're gonna want to meet this one.
01:41He's loaded. I mean, I don't know. You turn on the charm and maybe he'll invest in your products.
01:49I hate it when you make a good point.
01:52Angie's restaurant, 5pm. They're standing on the floor. Very hip. Don't be late. I made reservations.
02:00Wait, tonight? I don't have-
02:02Bye!
02:05Alex, I hate to push this again.
02:08Well, then don't.
02:10Listen, I've arranged a meeting with a lovely young girl. I know her family. They're good people. You two, you
02:16two should talk.
02:18I have a work meeting tonight. Can't make it.
02:20Well, then push it. Need I remind you that I can pull the plug on your inheritance anytime I want?
02:25Dad! What?
02:28Don't be late.
02:31Dad!
02:33I guess I have to sabotage this myself.
02:37Nick!
02:39I need a new shirt!
02:47What the fuck am I supposed to say?
02:51Hi.
02:51Hi, my mom set me up on this date. I don't really want a boyfriend, but hey!
02:56Do you happen to have two million dollars to invest in my condom brand?
03:05Okay.
03:21Hi, my name's Vivian. If you're interested in investing, I have an exceptional line of adult products that-
03:29You got to be kidding me. You're the lovely girl. Of course you'd ask my dad to set this up
03:37to get back in my good graces. I always knew you wanted me.
03:40Don't delude yourself, prick. For your information, I had no idea who I was meeting today. My mom put me
03:48up to this.
03:49Right. You expect me to believe that you didn't beg my dad to set this shindig up?
03:55Oh, please. You know as well as I do, our parents have been trying to set us up since high
04:00school. You've probably tricked us into this.
04:03Sure.
04:04As charmed as I am by your groveling, some of us don't have time to burn. I got somewhere to
04:12be.
04:14No, no, no, no! Vivian, what is she doing?
04:16Son, what are you doing? Get in there!
04:18Good. I can't stand breathing the same air as you anyway.
04:30Richard, what do we do? Do you think they're onto us?
04:33I don't know. But my stupid son is standing your daughter up.
04:39Not on my watch. Give me that.
04:46Oh!
04:51Oh!
04:52Shit!
04:52I'm so sorry.
04:53I have a meeting to get to.
04:55I'm really, really sorry. Is there anything I can do?
04:58Not unless you have a spare suit.
05:00Well, let's just get you back to that table here. And I will take this back to my apartment and
05:04I'll throw it in the wash.
05:05Just take an hour. And I'll just be back in an hour. Now there you go!
05:17Oh, great. You're back.
05:20Look, I...
05:22What happened to your suit?
05:23It's kind of a whole story.
05:25Well, I have to run.
05:28Wait. Where are you going?
05:30I'm meeting someone for drinks.
05:33You have a date lined up after our date?
05:35Not that it's any of your business, but not every meeting has to be a date.
05:40Besides, where were you running off to so quick?
05:43Well, I did have a business meeting, but some crazy lady with some crazy hat plowed into me with her
05:49coffee.
05:49And I'm not going to show up looking like a dirty rag after a morning rush.
05:55Well, good luck on your suit. I don't care.
06:00Hang on, hang on. You can't just leave me here waiting for an hour. Dining alone is humiliating.
06:06You know what's humiliating? Having your funding pulled by your boss's son in the middle of your product launch.
06:13I spent three years developing that product and now I'm back to square one trying to find an investor.
06:19Okay, look, if I sit here and I listen to your pitch, I mean consider it, will you stay with
06:26me until my suit is ready?
06:27Promise not to laugh?
06:29I promise to try not to laugh.
06:32You will.
06:35I promise to try not to laugh.
06:51I want to protect our love.
06:53When the moment matters, heroes choose wisely.
06:58Strength and sensitivity.
07:03Fitting.
07:04Invisible man, ultra ripped condom. Seamless and invisible for him. Absolute pleasure for her.
07:11Invisible man, love fold me.
07:20That was actually...
07:21I told you.
07:23I knew you majored in marketing, but I didn't think you were any...
07:28Do you let anyone finish their sentences?
07:31So what do you think?
07:32You want to invest or what?
07:36Look, Vivian.
07:37I gotta be honest with you.
07:39Condoms like this is a dime in a dozen.
07:42And I meant it when I said that the market is saturated with them.
07:46But, product is only as good as its marketing.
07:49And the marketing...
07:52It's good.
07:53You got a gift.
07:55Are you serious?
07:57What? No conviction in your abilities?
08:00Plenty of conviction in my abilities.
08:03None in you.
08:05But you'll back it.
08:07I'll consider putting it back on the roster.
08:10Have a pitch deck on my desk by Monday and I'll see what I can do.
08:14You won't regret this.
08:15I hope not.
08:19Vivian?
08:21Alan?
08:23Who the hell is that?
08:26Alan?
08:28Who the hell is that?
08:30My ex.
08:37Alan, what are you doing here?
08:40Well...
08:41Alan Birch.
08:43Nice to meet you.
08:44Pleasure.
08:46Anyway.
08:47I was going to our special spot and I walked past and saw you sitting here so I thought maybe...
08:53Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
08:54Our spot?
08:55Your spot?
08:56You two have a spot.
08:58Is that alright with you?
09:01Wait.
09:03This is the guy you're meeting up after meeting me?
09:06Alex, my mom sent me up on this date.
09:10I'm just grabbing drinks with Alan after.
09:14Look man, am I interrupting something?
09:17No, you're not interrupting anything.
09:20Oh.
09:21Alex, our parents set us up on a blind date, not exactly screwing you over.
09:28Well, if he's not interrupting anything, I guess there's nothing further to talk about.
09:34You can kiss the funding.
09:36Goodbye.
09:37Excuse me?
09:38Oh, you're excused.
09:40Wouldn't want to take away from your very important date.
09:44Goodbye, Miss Sawyer.
09:47Kiss him.
09:48Oh, are you jealous?
09:50You know, I don't blame you, Mr. I'm 27 and I've never had a girlfriend.
09:55I too have had a girlfriend.
09:57What the fuck is going on?
10:01Oh, Jesus.
10:04I hope Alex doesn't screw this up for us.
10:07Vivian can just swallow her pride for once.
10:11Are we crazy?
10:13I mean, they haven't exactly gotten along since high school.
10:16They were inseparable as kids.
10:19Yeah.
10:20I hope it just doesn't blow up in our faces, though.
10:25You know, that was really impressive, what you did with the coffee.
10:30And that accent.
10:32Oh, you mean this whole thing?
10:35Thank you, Richard. That's so kind of you.
10:38Yeah.
10:40How long did we have before I used to get back?
10:43About an hour, give or take.
10:45What do you think?
10:52Are you serious? You and me?
11:03Am I interrupting something, or...?
11:06Sit! Sit!
11:09Sit!
11:11Alex here is loaded, and he's going to pay for a meal.
11:15I'm not going to pay...
11:16You're not looping!
11:17I'm not going to pay for a meal.
11:19Waiter!
11:19Please!
11:25Jesus Christ.
11:26So if you get married and have kids, am I going to pay for their college tuition, too?
11:38Why haven't we been doing that for years?
11:42I don't know.
11:52I don't know.
11:55Is it time? Should we be getting back, or...?
11:59I think you could still use another spin cycle, don't you?
12:03I could give you another spin cycle.
12:05I don't know.
12:06I don't know.
12:07I don't know.
12:12I don't know.
12:14Look, Vivian.
12:16I was expecting tonight to be just two of us.
12:19Of course.
12:21Alex?
12:22Why don't you go pay for our meal now?
12:25We'll take it from here.
12:28That is, of course, unless Daddy forgot to give you your allowance for the week.
12:34I have my own money.
12:36Look, man, if it is...
12:38No!
12:39Nonsense.
12:41Alex has got it.
12:43Right, Alex?
12:48There.
12:49Happy?
12:50Very.
12:52You can leave now.
12:54Oh, no.
12:56I paid for a four-course meal.
12:58I'm staying for dessert.
13:00Don't you have a very important business meeting to attend to?
13:04I still don't have my fucking suit.
13:06Then buy a new one.
13:11Look...
13:11Wait, how about we just leave?
13:14Fine.
13:16I'll take that.
13:21Enjoy dessert.
13:25I'm sorry.
13:38I'm so sorry again.
13:40Here's your clean suit.
13:43Alex, huh?
13:45I don't recall telling you my name.
13:49Shit.
13:50It's okay, Miss Sawyer.
13:51I know it's you.
13:52Good accent, by the way.
13:54Fuck.
13:56Dad, you can come out, too.
13:58I know.
14:03What are you two doing here?
14:05People watching.
14:06Running errands.
14:08Running errands.
14:08People watching.
14:11Selling.
14:11Buying corn.
14:14Enough!
14:14Look, I know you're trying to get me and Vivian together.
14:18That's never going to happen.
14:20You can't stand each other.
14:22Besides, she already has her...
14:25Allah.
14:26You guys have known each other since you were kids.
14:28You're both single.
14:30What...
14:31What is the hold-up?
14:32You're both single.
14:33Why don't you date each other?
14:37Alex!
14:38I think Vivian just left with her old boyfriend, Alan.
14:42Great.
14:43He seems like an amazing guy.
14:45What's that got to do with me?
14:46Look, I know he might seem like he's good for her,
14:49but he is not good for her.
14:51He is a playboy.
14:52Please, I am begging you.
14:54I think you would treat her so well.
14:56With all due respect, Miss Sawyer.
14:58That's not my responsibility.
15:01Feel free to take over the table.
15:02I've lost my appetite.
15:06Hmm.
15:10Richard!
15:11What?
15:12You've given me quite an appetite.
15:14Sorry.
15:16How have you been?
15:18Nothing good.
15:21Is she really that happy with him?
15:30Why is it so hot?
15:32I don't like to turn the air on.
15:34Huh.
15:34I've already had my meal.
15:37Why is this bothering me?
15:42How have you been?
15:44Nothing good.
15:45Hmm?
15:45And you?
15:46I'm good.
15:47I just finally finished my clinical hours.
15:50And I'm officially Dr. Alan Birch, licensed MD.
15:55Oh, funny.
15:56The guy who made me turn to therapy ends up being a therapist.
16:02I deserve that one.
16:03Just giving you a hard time.
16:06No one's a saint in college.
16:09Well, that's what I wanted to talk to you about.
16:11I'm finally ready to be with a girl that I like.
16:15And I was hoping that we'll meet again.
16:18I only met with a kid.
16:21Man.
16:32Damn it.
16:34Drive.
16:35Oh, okay.
16:41Are you okay?
16:42Yeah.
16:49Hey, kids.
16:50Am I interrupting your little date?
16:52Oh, my God.
16:54You're obsessed.
16:56Why don't you go get your own date?
16:59Can't get one.
17:00Can you?
17:01I hope you know what you're getting yourself into.
17:04She's rude.
17:06She has no filter.
17:07And she's the single most insufferable and ill-mannered woman I've ever had the displeasure of meeting.
17:13So that's what you're into.
17:15I love every part of her.
17:18I always have.
17:19And I always will.
17:20How long has always been, huh?
17:23Maybe you met Vivian in college, but I've known her since her diaper days, pal.
17:28What is this? A dick measuring contest?
17:31Wait.
17:32I get it.
17:33You hired him to swoop in on our date to embarrass me, didn't you?
17:38Alex, not all of us have to pay for our dates.
17:42Yeah, come on, Viv.
17:43It started to rain now.
17:45Let's get out of here.
17:50I have a car!
17:53Hey, boss.
17:54It's raining.
17:56Did you forget in the car?
17:57Hey, Nick.
17:59I need you to dig up everything you can find on Alex Birch.
18:02I don't believe this nice guy crap.
18:05I see.
18:12Geez.
18:13Viv, you look hot today.
18:16Well, the implication that I do not look hot every day does not go unnoticed.
18:21Obviously not what I meant.
18:23Look, what came for you?
18:25I didn't even care with a note.
18:30Hey, could these be from Alex?
18:34They must be from Alan.
18:37He started obsessed with you.
18:39How did they go last night?
18:42Great.
18:42It went great.
18:45Don't you have some schedules to send out?
18:48No, you were no fun.
18:50I'll see you later.
19:02Alan.
19:03I liked Alan.
19:06He's done the work.
19:08Yeah, it's good work.
19:15Good morning, Viv.
19:17I remember you loved red roses.
19:20Well, good morning.
19:22What's up?
19:23Well, if you're not in a mood for a small talk, I'll cut to the chase.
19:27Do you want to go on a date with me tonight?
19:44Oh.
19:47Oh.
19:49So fragile.
19:57Richard, we've been worried about the children for years.
20:01This night is for us.
20:04Oh, what a perfect night to try Vivian's new aphrodisiac.
20:08Ooh.
20:12Naughty, naughty.
20:15You're so debonair.
20:17You're like a blonde James Bond.
20:21Sean Connery.
20:22I'm not into Danny Craig.
20:24No offense, Danny.
20:30What?
20:31I thought you said they were going to be out all night.
20:33They must take them back early.
20:34What?
20:35Jesus, what are we going to do?
20:38We have to get out of here.
20:40Oh.
20:51Oh.
20:53What's with the mood lighting?
20:57I thought we were just having a coffee.
21:02I have no idea what this is, but it looks like my mom's handiwork.
21:08But I'm not complaining.
21:10I can use a drink.
21:13Okay.
21:16No!
21:19But the special wine!
21:31I can't.
21:32Don't get the wrong idea.
21:35Okay, that's a new product I'm testing.
21:38I must have forgot I left it out.
21:41Okay.
21:42Okay, well.
21:42See?
21:43The way you love your job is what I admire the most about you.
21:51Oh!
21:55We must stop!
21:56No!
21:58Do you want her to see us like this?
22:00No!
22:03We leave!
22:04We change clothes!
22:05And then we stop them!
22:07We're on the second floor!
22:08We don't have a choice!
22:11Too wise, my son.
22:12So goddamn useless!
22:21I'm just feeling really dizzy and kind of hot.
22:30Well, I think you need to rest now.
22:33I will take good care of you.
22:35Okay.
22:36Okay, just go.
22:47Turn around.
22:49Sure boss, are we heading home or?
22:51Let's go find Vivian.
22:53I have to tell her there's something off with Alan.
23:10Okay, you drank way too much.
23:21What did you do?
23:25Hmm?
23:31How can a virgin like you design sex toys?
23:38Maybe I should test them out and give you some feedback.
23:43Don't give that to me.
23:55I want to enjoy this.
23:55JustYN
24:07I want to enjoy this.
24:13I'll see you soon.
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