00:00I'm not a baby! I'm not a baby! I am not a baby!
00:07And all the mommies are going to be very happy because their kids want to grow up to be just like me.
00:14Because I was talented enough to pin 2 Call Scorpio for the TV title.
00:20I was hardcore enough to carry Cactus Jack to the tag team titles.
00:25And I was extreme enough to take the world heavyweight title from the Sandman.
00:31And after the match tonight, Rob Van Dam, all my friends are going to come back to the locker room
00:37and raise glasses of hot cocoa to me, the winner, and the new ECW Television Champion, Mikey Whipbrick.
00:47Bang!
00:49Bang!
00:55Bang!
00:56Bang!
00:57Bang!
00:58Bang!
00:59Bang!
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01:20Bang!
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01:22Bang!
01:23Bang!
