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00:00:00oh my god did you hear there's supposed to be a mysterious VIP passenger on the
00:00:12Hawkeye 42's maiden flight today I heard he's the secret Maple Airlines investor
00:00:16everyone's been talking about he's supposed to be the richest man in the
00:00:20world where did you see William in? 1A oh my god if I book him as my sugar daddy
00:00:25never have to work again oh please we all know that I'm the Marilyn Monroe of
00:00:30this cabin crew if anyone's gonna bag this secret millionaire's attention it's
00:00:35me well maybe he's not a boots guy maybe he's an ass guy
00:00:48ready ladies not yet I think well takeoff is in 30 minutes
00:00:55so we focus more on getting ready and less on gossip
00:00:58why does Evelyn have to be our lead she's probably going to try and bag that secret billionaire for
00:01:07herself
00:01:08welcome mr. dead hawking us what's with the spectacle I told you I can get her on my own
00:01:23it's our job to keep you safe sir you're our airline's top investor
00:01:26Sylvia the whole idea was for me to disguise myself as ground crews so I can
00:01:30observe our airline service quality escorted me like I'm the goddamn president of the
00:01:34United States isn't exactly helping I apologize here's your ticket sir
00:01:41better not see anyone following me
00:01:48welcome aboard Maple Airlines sorry for running late just you know typical LA traffic
00:02:05that guy is not the VIP passenger not a chance he's nothing but a filthy grounds crew worker
00:02:17excuse me sir you can't sit here and why is that this is first class economy is back there in the main
00:02:31cabin okay I like where I'm sitting give me a break with the dirt rags you're wearing
00:02:39oh I like what I'm wearing first class is for the social elites millionaires and CEOs but you
00:02:48you're nothing but a washed-up grounds crew worker you belong out there handling baggage miss you really
00:02:56shouldn't judge other people by what they're wearing now if you don't believe me you can check the booking
00:03:01records the booking records will confirm that this seat is reserved for our most distinguished passenger
00:03:08Maple Airlines top investor that's exactly right oh let me get a chance I would love a cup of coffee just black
00:03:19thanks Tyler get over here we have a low-life grounds crew worker who snuck on the plane without a ticket
00:03:31what did you just call me he's sitting in first class and refusing to leave
00:03:36chill out Claire I'll take care of it
00:03:39hey you were coffee right I did thanks yes
00:03:50fucker that is why we don't serve coffee to minimum wage dirt bag
00:04:06will you try to spill the coffee on me first where are your manners that's it enough playing games
00:04:12where is your ticket word of advice that's nice the next time
00:04:16where's my ticket doesn't look like there will be a next time see this folks just another wannabe
00:04:31trying to scam his way into first class just get him off the plane
00:04:34shh we got this thank you time's up buddy listen I have a ticket how else would I have gotten on that airplane
00:04:40I mean look at this you have single-handedly turned first class into a first grade junkyard
00:04:45you're the one who tried to spill coffee on me
00:04:47you're the one who tried no listen this is gonna be one of two ways
00:04:50either you lick this shit up or I'll have airport security remove you from this plane
00:04:57got it mr. that's me nicely and you think airport security is gonna listen to you
00:05:04over me of course they will
00:05:08FAA regulations state when you enter a vessel that is larger and heavier than air
00:05:13and hence wings right with an engine that propels you into the sky
00:05:17we are in charge so yes who the hell do you think you are
00:05:22I own this airline that's it enough playtime let's go get out
00:05:29and who do you think you are to touch me
00:05:37it's true
00:05:40ninja or something that's it we've got to get him out of here I'm calling airport security
00:05:45I'm calling airport security this flight attendant is assaulting a passenger and
00:05:49Maple Airlines is the best service in the industry
00:05:53give me that phone that video needs to be deleted
00:05:57not a chance the public deserves to know about your abusive service
00:06:01she's right this needs to be documented
00:06:04delete that video or you'll all be banned from Maple Airlines for life
00:06:12you have to see this
00:06:19what on earth contact the pilot for that flight and tell them to delay takeoff
00:06:25I'm going on board
00:06:27you don't understand that man snuck on board without a ticket he's a stowaway
00:06:41that's right folks for all we know he could be trying to hijack this plane okay this is for your own safety
00:06:47he's been pulling our leg this whole time he came out
00:06:50he came out yeah fuck that guy
00:06:52the last thing I needed some hobo derailing my travel plans
00:06:56attention passengers welcome aboard Maple Airlines flight 451
00:07:01due to some unforeseen circumstances we're going to be delaying takeoff
00:07:05but hang tight we'll be in the air shortly
00:07:07we really appreciate your patience
00:07:09god damn it this fucking ticketless fuck is going to make me miss my connecting flight
00:07:14somebody call airport security what a shit show this guy should be kicked out to TSA
00:07:20calm down ladies and gents I have a ticket okay
00:07:29if you can't show us the ticket then you can't be on this flight
00:07:34it's time to go
00:07:37keep your hands off my property sorry but we're at capacity no room for dead weight like you
00:07:45dead weight I think you two are the dead weight on my property
00:07:53what property you're poor your property is trash
00:07:57I'm warning you
00:08:00which is why this is going out the window
00:08:04how would a dirt poor laborer like you even afford a guitar
00:08:24you probably stole it from one of the passengers
00:08:28this was a gift
00:08:32from my late wife
00:08:36Maple Airlines is named after her
00:08:39do you realize whose honor you've disgraced
00:08:42sure
00:08:44a lot of people are named Maple
00:08:46you can claim whatever you want
00:08:48doesn't change the fact that you
00:08:50and this piece of junk belong in the garbage
00:08:53well one thing's for sure
00:08:56this guitar is nowhere near as valuable as all of the time we have wasted
00:09:00trying to get you off this flight
00:09:02the sooner this guitar gets smashed
00:09:04the better
00:09:05see
00:09:06we're doing you a favor by smashing it
00:09:09don't you dare
00:09:10look I don't care
00:09:14whoever you are
00:09:15you want money
00:09:17I have plenty
00:09:19but more than that
00:09:20who I am
00:09:23makes me a nightmare for people like you
00:09:30airport security
00:09:31they've got a passenger stirring up trouble on Maple Airlines flight 451
00:09:35yes send someone now
00:09:37are you threatening us?
00:09:39are you threatening us?
00:09:40we work for Maple Airlines
00:09:42owned by the richest man in the world
00:09:44Jet Hawkins
00:09:46you are so dead
00:09:48I'm Jet Hawkins
00:09:49wait till these dimwits find out I'm your boss
00:09:52this guitar better not be broken
00:09:54because if it is
00:09:56you'll what?
00:09:57beg me for money to buy a new one because you can't afford it on your dirt board salary?
00:10:01or salary?
00:10:05I won't be the one begging
00:10:07you will
00:10:08who's the one stirring up trouble?
00:10:10that man with the guitar
00:10:12he snuck on board without a ticket and he threatened a flight attendant
00:10:15sir
00:10:16gonna have to ask you to take your hands off the guitar case
00:10:19he could be hiding a bomb in there
00:10:21maybe he's trying to blow up the plane
00:10:23oh my god quick take the case
00:10:25hurry up before we all die
00:10:27sir
00:10:28you're not gonna ask twice
00:10:29get your hands off the case
00:10:33none of you hold rank high enough to search my belongings
00:10:39he is nothing but a bottom feeding ground staff
00:10:42we're all literally leagues above him
00:10:46if you would like to see my late wife's handiwork
00:10:49I would gladly open my case and show you all
00:10:53don't vote for it, it's a trap
00:10:55don't fucking trust him, he's a terrorist
00:11:05what's all this fuss about?
00:11:07no
00:11:17sir, I'm Evelyn, lead flight attendant
00:11:20here at Maple Airlines we take the proper handling of our passengers belongings very seriously
00:11:24and I can assure you nothing else will happen to your guitar
00:11:30isn't she the top lead flight attendant at our airline?
00:11:33I'm undercover so it's best not to cause a scene and reveal my identity
00:11:37you seem trustworthy
00:11:41unlike
00:11:43you
00:11:44you
00:12:00watch out Tyler
00:12:01this is the customer service hour airline is so well known for
00:12:05you
00:12:06judge those beneath you when you act like monsters yourselves
00:12:20my bad
00:12:22you know, you're more than welcome to file a compensation claim for it
00:12:24deadline's Friday
00:12:25but of course the airline's conclusion may very well be that the rinkity-dink old guitar might be completely worthless
00:12:38that's for you
00:12:42that's what I thought
00:12:43I thought
00:12:44baggage boy
00:12:59my wife
00:13:01handcrafted this guitar with exquisite 1980s Cuban mahogany
00:13:06for me
00:13:08let me remind you
00:13:10the company
00:13:12you work for
00:13:14is named after her
00:13:16why is he so serious?
00:13:17is he really related to the owner of this airline?
00:13:22she was a saint
00:13:24offering jobs to the homeless gave him a second chance
00:13:26but you
00:13:27to get your dirty fingers off me please
00:13:29you?
00:13:30arrogant, stuck-up pricks
00:13:32think you get to decide
00:13:34who's first class?
00:13:35who's econ class?
00:13:37when you can't even discern the values that this company was built upon
00:13:40you're both
00:13:42disgrace to humanity
00:13:46security!
00:13:48here
00:13:49this baggage boy is trying to kill a flight attendant
00:13:52good god! somebody tackle that man
00:13:55Sylvia
00:13:56I give you ten seconds to get here
00:13:58right now
00:14:00Sylvia...
00:14:01Stone?
00:14:03she's VP of Maple Airlines
00:14:05only second to Jet Hawking's
00:14:07god you just won't stop pretending
00:14:10well
00:14:12when Sylvia Stone gets here
00:14:14with my take of showing who I am
00:14:16you'll all cower in fear
00:14:19are you all watching this clown show?
00:14:21this grounds crew worker couldn't even shine Ms. Stone's shoes
00:14:25let alone get her on the phone
00:14:28don't believe the man
00:14:30throw him out!
00:14:32throw him out!
00:14:33throw him out!
00:14:34throw him out!
00:14:35throw him out!
00:14:36throw him out!
00:14:37throw him out!
00:14:38throw him out!
00:14:44did someone piss off my boss?
00:14:46Oh my god, that's the VP. She like, runs shit here.
00:14:53Claire is beyond fucked.
00:14:55Explain this.
00:14:57Miss Stone, this baggage boy snuck into first class without a ticket.
00:15:03He's delayed the flight and we're having him removed.
00:15:06Having him removed? Is this how you treat first class passengers?
00:15:10Take a good look at the nightmare you've created for us.
00:15:15Great work everyone.
00:15:22Thanks to you, our company's stocks have lost over a billion dollars in the past 20 minutes.
00:15:27Don't blame me. Blame this fraud who snuck on board without a ticket and insisted on sitting in first class.
00:15:35Who says he doesn't have a ticket?
00:15:38Sir, you dropped your ticket just before boarding.
00:15:42I wanted to make sure you received it.
00:15:45So, you're really the chief?
00:15:51So, you're really the chief?
00:15:57That's what they call me.
00:16:00The chief.
00:16:02The CEO, Mr. Hawking, only ever uses his alias on documents to keep a low profile.
00:16:07You're welcome.
00:16:10First class.
00:16:12Well, now that I've proven I belong here oh so precious.
00:16:15First class.
00:16:16Now that I care about status.
00:16:18I do expect reparations to be made.
00:16:21Reparations.
00:16:23What the hell did you do to him?
00:16:26I'm so sorry.
00:16:28I'm so sorry.
00:16:29I'm so sorry.
00:16:31Sir, sir, I made a mistake.
00:16:33Oh, God heavens.
00:16:34I told you what would happen if you judged people by their covers.
00:16:40You two broke my wife's guitar.
00:16:43She gave that to me the day the airline opened.
00:16:47I did.
00:16:48I made a terrible mistake.
00:16:54Sir, I'm so sorry.
00:16:57It's all our fault.
00:16:58No.
00:16:59No, this isn't your fault.
00:17:00You don't have to worry.
00:17:01No.
00:17:02No.
00:17:03I'm their team leader and I have to take responsibility.
00:17:05Now this girl, Evelyn, is the right kind of leadership I value at our company.
00:17:09I am friends with the owner of the best music repair shop in LA.
00:17:13And if you're willing to trust me, I can ask him to piece your guitar back together.
00:17:26You dimwits are fired.
00:17:27And I'll see to it that you never work for another airline company ever again.
00:17:31Immediately, your employment with Maple Airlines has been terminated.
00:17:36Please, please, give us another chance.
00:17:38Please.
00:17:39No, no, no, no, no.
00:17:40Please, out of my way.
00:17:41Please.
00:17:42Please.
00:17:43Please.
00:17:44No.
00:17:45No.
00:17:46No, no, no, no, no, no.
00:17:47No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
00:17:49No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
00:17:50I don't want to go.
00:17:51Tyler!
00:17:52Give me another chance.
00:17:54No, Tyler, please.
00:17:56No.
00:18:00I am so sorry about the ordeal, sir.
00:18:03Please enjoy the rest of your flight.
00:18:05Thank you, Sylvia.
00:18:07That was intense.
00:18:16If the chairwoman came to personally give him his ticket, that old bag boy might actually
00:18:22be the mystery VIP passenger.
00:18:25You really think so?
00:18:28Why would a billionaire be wearing ground crew uniform?
00:18:32Huh, it all makes sense now.
00:18:35That old geezer really almost had me fooled.
00:18:38What are you talking about?
00:18:41Ms. Stone only came because she saw the firing moment.
00:18:44She's here to protect the airline's reputation and stop the stocks from plummeting.
00:18:48That's the only reason why she fired Claire and gave that guy a ticket.
00:18:53There is no way he is the VIP passenger.
00:18:58Welcome aboard, sir.
00:19:00Mr. Tickson, isn't that Maple Airlines' new general manager?
00:19:12Oh, so he's the mystery VIP passenger.
00:19:18So he is the mystery VIP passenger.
00:19:21Yes, I agree.
00:19:23That makes way more sense.
00:19:24Shh.
00:19:26Holy fuck me.
00:19:28What are you two chatting about over here?
00:19:32We're getting ready for takeoff, so you should return to your seats.
00:19:39Ladies and gentlemen, we're getting ready for takeoff.
00:19:42Please return to your seats and fasten your seatbelts.
00:19:45Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to our Maypole Airlines flight 451 with service to John F.
00:20:13Kennedy International Airport. We have now reached an altitude of 20,000 feet, and cabin service will begin shortly. Thank you so much for your patience.
00:20:23Fuck me. These flight attendances keep getting hotter. Jesus Christ.
00:20:30Mr. Dixon? Yeah? That's Evelyn Grant, Maypole Airlines flight attendant of the year. Not only is she beautiful, she is damn good at her job.
00:20:39Yeah, whatever. Shut the fuck up, okay? Why don't you do yourself a favor? Why don't you call her over here? Let's see how good at a job she really is.
00:20:50Excuse me, miss.
00:20:53Yes? How can I help you?
00:20:55Yeah, my, um, my seatbelt's a little tight. You think we can, you think we can loosen it for me?
00:21:03Of course.
00:21:11Sir, if you could just keep still, please?
00:21:16Yeah, sure I could do that.
00:21:21Sir, please, keep your hands to yourself.
00:21:24Listen close, honey. I'm the general fucking manager of Maypole Airlines.
00:21:27So if you don't obey my wishes, you're fucking fucked.
00:21:34Stop.
00:21:35Oh, just so fucking...
00:21:36Someone help, please.
00:21:37Help, please, someone.
00:21:39Oh, fuck!
00:21:42Since when does being general manager give you the right to sexually harass your staff?
00:21:47I'm sorry, but who the fuck are you?
00:21:53Who the fuck are you?
00:21:55Don't change the topic.
00:21:56I asked you a question.
00:21:57What makes you think you can harass her?
00:22:00Look, bud.
00:22:01You're pushing 60, still lugging around 50-pound bags for a fucking living.
00:22:07So stop and lecture on me on how to lead my life and mind your own fucking business.
00:22:13Anybody who harasses anyone on my plane, that is my damn business.
00:22:18You know what, fucker?
00:22:20Give me the money.
00:22:22Here's $5,000.
00:22:24Now go back to where you belong.
00:22:26And sit next to the toilet in economy class where you fucking belong.
00:22:31Now that's power, baby.
00:22:33Like that?
00:22:34I know you want to be with a real man.
00:22:35Like me.
00:22:36God, you look so beautiful.
00:22:38Come on, baby.
00:22:38Oh, what the fuck?
00:22:42If you go back to economy, I'll give you $500,000.
00:22:45You know what you're fucking messing with?
00:22:57I do.
00:22:58I'm messing with a toxic, abusive manager who harasses his employees.
00:23:02Wake up, Gramps.
00:23:02You're a fucking minimum wage worker.
00:23:04Not some heroic crusader or fucking justice or whatever the fuck you think you are.
00:23:09Sir, Mr. Dixon, he's the general manager.
00:23:14He's very powerful and it's not worth getting into a fight with him.
00:23:17Powerful man, huh?
00:23:18Yeah.
00:23:20All I see is a pathetic, weak, insecure coward.
00:23:24Have you looked yourself in the mirror, old man?
00:23:26Sir, I think you're talking about your own ugly ass.
00:23:29Sir, I really appreciate the effort, but I don't want you to get fired.
00:23:35I'll just, I'll resign once we land.
00:23:39He won't have to resign.
00:23:41If anyone's going to resign, it's going to be him.
00:23:46No, me?
00:23:47Resign?
00:23:50I'm the general fucking manager, okay?
00:23:53There's only one person on this planet that can make me resign, and that's Jet fucking Hawkins himself.
00:23:58He has no clue on his boss.
00:24:01I'll play with him a bit longer.
00:24:03Jet Hawkins?
00:24:05Who is that again?
00:24:06This fucking guy.
00:24:07Wait, do you actually haven't heard of him?
00:24:09Everybody's talking about him.
00:24:11He's the billionaire with the monopoly on aeronautic grade steel.
00:24:16I mean, only higher-ups have ever seen his face.
00:24:19Well, that guy.
00:24:21Oh, okay.
00:24:22Wow, you know him?
00:24:25Of course, of course I do.
00:24:27I'm the general manager.
00:24:29Actually, matter of fact, my uncle's going to take me to see him as soon as we land this plane.
00:24:33You know, because we've got big business to discuss.
00:24:35Things that you don't know fucking nothing about.
00:24:37Oh, and who's your uncle again?
00:24:42He's the fucking CEO of Maple Airlines.
00:24:44Heard of him?
00:24:45Hello?
00:24:46Are you listening?
00:24:47See, that's really funny because I don't remember seeing that on Mr. Hawkins' schedule for today.
00:24:53Not to mention, he doesn't typically meet with employees of your lowly stature.
00:24:58I'm the general fucking manager.
00:25:00I have every right to meet with him.
00:25:02But my question to you is, how the fuck do you know what Jet Hawkins' schedule looks like?
00:25:05Because I am Jet Hawkins.
00:25:16This old man's lost his fucking mind.
00:25:18Look at this guy, huh?
00:25:19What the fuck are you doing?
00:25:22Mr. Dixon, I think it would be a good idea if you just sat down and stayed quiet for a little while.
00:25:26We don't want any more complications.
00:25:29Complications?
00:25:31What the hell are you talking about?
00:25:32Today is this Hawkeye 42 aircraft's maiden flight.
00:25:36The whole world is watching.
00:25:38Yes, because today is also the first time Jet Hawkins' aircraft is doing a commercial flight.
00:25:44His aircrafts are the best.
00:25:45We've already had a viral video go out about employee misconduct.
00:25:48We can't have another rumor that could potentially harm our airline's reputation.
00:25:52Why are you so weird by the way, huh?
00:25:55As my assistant, you do as I fucking say, you understand?
00:25:59Mr. Dixon, I just, I just, I don't want Mr. Hawkins and Mr. Kane.
00:26:03Kane is my fucking uncle, you idiot.
00:26:06You understand?
00:26:07He ain't gonna do shit.
00:26:08And if anyone here is foolish enough to tell any lies about me,
00:26:14then I'll consider that your resignation.
00:26:16So come here right now.
00:26:18Come here, right now.
00:26:23Sir, you don't have to do this.
00:26:25It's fine.
00:26:27You might fear this tyrant of our general manager, but I don't.
00:26:30It's beneath me.
00:26:32You think you're invincible?
00:26:33Let me tell you.
00:26:35Abusing your power and sexually harassing your employee?
00:26:38Well, that is grounds for your immediate termination from Maple Airlines.
00:26:41Not to mention prison time.
00:26:42We're 35,000 feet in the air.
00:26:47Who's gonna dismiss me?
00:26:48You?
00:26:48Hmm?
00:26:50Bingo.
00:26:51Come on, Crash.
00:26:53You can't afford in-flight Wi-Fi with your minimum wage ground crew salary.
00:26:58Get the fuck out of here.
00:27:00Jed Hawkins here.
00:27:01Tell HR I want Roderick Dixon removed from the company within the next 30 seconds.
00:27:05I have to give it to you.
00:27:07You're a pretty good actor, old man.
00:27:09You know what?
00:27:09If you could make a phone call and get me fired, I'll jump out the fucking plane myself.
00:27:15No parachute.
00:27:16Sir, it's for you.
00:27:32Fucking wait right here, alright?
00:27:37Yeah.
00:27:38What?
00:27:39You're firing me?
00:27:41You're...
00:27:41You can't fire me!
00:27:42You cannot fire me!
00:27:44What?
00:27:46You're firing me?
00:27:47You're...
00:27:48You can't fire me!
00:27:49You cannot fire me!
00:27:55Who is he?
00:27:57Yeah, no.
00:27:58I am the general manager, okay?
00:27:59I am unstoppable!
00:28:01This is a fucking scam!
00:28:03Fuck.
00:28:03You!
00:28:06You wrinkly, piss-poor baggage handler!
00:28:10You thought you could trick me with a prank phone call?
00:28:12You know what?
00:28:13You're gonna pay for this.
00:28:16Are you okay?
00:28:30Yeah.
00:28:31You saved me twice now.
00:28:34Attention passengers.
00:28:49This is your path that's making it.
00:28:51We're experiencing some strong turbulence as we move through this patch of infinite weather.
00:28:57Please return to your seats.
00:28:58That's what you're seeing, Alice.
00:29:00Jesus fucking Christ!
00:29:01Who gave this guy to your pilot his license?
00:29:03He's gonna get me fucking down!
00:29:04He's gonna get me fucking down!
00:29:06I'm sorry.
00:29:07I didn't mean to.
00:29:08I'm sorry.
00:29:09I didn't mean to.
00:29:10No, no, no.
00:29:11You saved me.
00:29:12Twice already.
00:29:13What the fuck are you guys doing?!
00:29:15I'm sorry.
00:29:16I'm sorry.
00:29:17I didn't mean to.
00:29:18No, no, no, no.
00:29:19You saved me.
00:29:20Twice already.
00:29:21What the fuck are you guys doing?!
00:29:22Attention passengers.
00:29:23We're going through a severe thunderstorm with dangerously high winds and heavy rains.
00:29:24We're not gonna let you go.
00:29:25I'm sorry.
00:29:26I'm sorry.
00:29:27I didn't mean to.
00:29:28No, no, no.
00:29:29You saved me.
00:29:30Twice already.
00:29:31What the fuck are you guys doing?!
00:29:32Attention passengers.
00:29:33We're going through a severe thunderstorm with dangerously high winds and heavy rains.
00:29:51We're not gonna last long here.
00:29:53And there are no nearby airports.
00:29:56So we're gonna perform an emergency landing.
00:30:00Please stay in your seats and stay calm.
00:30:03Emergency landing?!
00:30:04What the fuck does that mean?!
00:30:06Mr. Dixon, it means there's no airport available.
00:30:08We need to find some flat area to land like a field or something.
00:30:11I don't know.
00:30:12I can't.
00:30:13It's gonna be incredibly dangerous.
00:30:14All I know is that we have to land, but we're probably not gonna make it!
00:30:17We're not gonna make it, Will.
00:30:18We're not gonna fucking make it!
00:30:19I can't.
00:30:21I just became the general fucking manager.
00:30:23I can't fucking die now!
00:30:29Everybody, calm down.
00:30:31Our captain has been with us for 30 years, and he has a perfect flight record.
00:30:35If anybody can land this airplane, it's him.
00:30:37I don't give a fucking rat's ass about a fucking perfect flight record!
00:30:41If he knew what he was doing, he wouldn't have fucking flown us in the eye of a middle of a fucking star!
00:30:45Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
00:30:47No, no, no, no.
00:30:48No, I can't die. I can't die tonight.
00:30:50I'm a general manager. I'm a general fucking manager.
00:30:53My life is worth more than everyone on this goddamn plane.
00:30:56So you go ahead and tell that fucking captain that if he crash lands this fucking plane, that I'd get every goddamn fucking parachute!
00:31:04So that's it?
00:31:06Your life is the only one that matters.
00:31:08It's you! Your fucking bad luck!
00:31:10I knew the second I saw you that this was going to be a fight for me.
00:31:12Oh, Jesus fucking Christ!
00:31:14You're such a baby.
00:31:16Fuck you!
00:31:17Evelyn, tell this captain to turn the plane around.
00:31:20I know where we can land.
00:31:28Have you been in touch with the control tower?
00:31:30The storm's getting worse.
00:31:32If we don't connect with air traffic control,
00:31:34we're going to have no other choice than to crash land.
00:31:38Ma'am, we're flying over a mountainous region.
00:31:40It looks like the nearest field long enough for us to land in is over 200 miles away.
00:31:44We're going to run out of fuel.
00:31:45Well, we don't have a plan B.
00:31:47We have no choice but to go for it.
00:31:49Captain! This man says he wants a place where to land.
00:31:52Captain, Godspeed racetrack has a two-mile stretch of straight road you can land on.
00:31:56It is no different than landing on a runway.
00:31:58This guy's bullshit! You know a racetrack is for cars!
00:32:00Our fucking planes!
00:32:01In these conditions, I put our chances of pulling off a safe crash landing in less than one percent.
00:32:06So unless anybody has any better ideas, we need to aim for that racetrack.
00:32:10Fuck no! Okay?
00:32:11I'm not putting my life in the hands of some goddamn baggage handler, okay?
00:32:14That's suicide!
00:32:16Stop! Are you insane?
00:32:18Listen to me.
00:32:20We're landing the plane at that racetrack.
00:32:22Trust me. I know what I'm talking about.
00:32:26He's just a baggage handler. He's just an old baggage handler.
00:32:28He doesn't know what he's doing. Please!
00:32:30Listen to me! No! No!
00:32:32Captain, I don't know about this.
00:32:35What the hell's wrong with you?
00:32:36You're risking the lives of hundreds of people.
00:32:37I was supposed to meet the most powerful man on earth in New York!
00:32:40Jeff fucking Hawking!
00:32:41I'll get it to you.
00:32:42We lost contact with air traffic control.
00:32:44Landing at any airport right now is out of the question.
00:32:47Fuck! Goddamn it!
00:32:49No, no, no, no.
00:32:50My people, they're waiting for me on the tarmac.
00:32:52Hey, what the fuck are they supposed to do, huh?
00:32:54You know how long I've been preparing for this meeting with Mr. Hawking?
00:32:58Huh? Do you?
00:32:59One year! One fucking year of my time!
00:33:02Well, let me tell you.
00:33:03Where I descend is where they shall wait.
00:33:05Captain!
00:33:15Sir, my passengers' lives are at stake here.
00:33:19Are you even sure it's safe to land at this racetrack?
00:33:22This racetrack was specifically designed to serve as an airstrip in the event of emergency landings.
00:33:27I guarantee you all the passengers on board will make it out of life.
00:33:31Fuck it! Redirect the plane!
00:33:34We're gonna land at Godspeed racetrack!
00:33:51Mr. Parsons, we just got word that Mr. Hawking's flight will be making an emergency landing on this racetrack.
00:33:55Double check the track for any potential hazards.
00:33:57If there's anything happen to Mr. Hawking's, we will be following him right into the grave.
00:34:04Okay, enough playing slick, motherfucker!
00:34:06Not even the pilots, nor the traffic patrol, knows that you can use that raceway as an emergency landing!
00:34:12How the fuck did you get that intel?
00:34:14Because I own the racetrack.
00:34:19Bullshit!
00:34:20You own it?
00:34:22Sir, I didn't know you were involved in auto racing!
00:34:25I wasn't young and dangerous once.
00:34:27No, get real.
00:34:29You know how much racetracks go for?
00:34:31I mean, they're just as much as airports!
00:34:32I have properties all over the world.
00:34:34This racetrack was just a sight.
00:34:36We're gonna make it out okay. I promise.
00:34:48Sir, we're approaching the racetrack, but I can't make out any of the ground lights.
00:34:53With this kind of visibility, we can't land without something to guide us!
00:34:57Caught me. I'll have him turn on the lights.
00:35:00Get the fuck out of here!
00:35:02This is Jed Hawkins.
00:35:04Hit the lights.
00:35:30Oh my God!
00:35:48Ladies and gentlemen, we've done it. We've landed a Godspeed racetrack.
00:35:52Sir, I don't know what we would have done without you. We would all have died.
00:35:56On behalf of everybody in this fight, thank you.
00:36:03There's nothing.
00:36:05Don't you fucking dare thank this ground crew fraud on my fucking behalf!
00:36:10Especially not until we get to the bottom of your sinister fucking plan!
00:36:14Sinister plan? He saved all of us, including you!
00:36:18Cut the fucking bullshit!
00:36:19Did you feel how smooth that we landed? Huh?
00:36:22That just proves that this whole fucking emergency thing was staged!
00:36:27Which means all you motherfuckers!
00:36:29You fucking landed this plane in the middle of nowhere on purpose!
00:36:34Admit it! Okay?
00:36:36You guys have some sort of fucking ulterior motive or some bullshit!
00:36:39What ulterior motives could he have?
00:36:41The second we get off this plane, it's gonna look real ugly for you sons of bitches.
00:36:46With all due respect, you're just the ex-general manager of Maple Airlines now.
00:36:52There's really nothing you can do to us.
00:36:54You sure about that, you old fuck?
00:36:57Here's the deal.
00:36:59If you come clean, and you tell me your master fucking plan or whatever it is you just fucking did,
00:37:04I'll let you off the hook!
00:37:09Otherwise...
00:37:11You're not gonna make it off this racetrack alive.
00:37:15So you're gonna hold me hostage then?
00:37:19Well, this should be fun.
00:37:21Fuck you.
00:37:22Fuck you.
00:37:23Fuck you.
00:37:24Fuck you!
00:37:25Fuck you!
00:37:35Okay, this motherfucker disrespected me, okay?
00:37:38We're gonna go, we're gonna fuck this guy up!
00:37:40You understand?
00:37:42I don't know who the fuck he is.
00:37:51Okay, ground crew.
00:37:52Guess we're gonna do this the hard way.
00:37:54Break this motherfucker's legs.
00:37:56And if anyone says anything about it, I'll pay the right people off.
00:37:59Matter of fact, don't break this fucker's legs.
00:38:02Kill this motherfucker now!
00:38:18What the hell do you think you're doing?
00:38:19Uncle Kate!
00:38:24You don't get to call me uncle ever again.
00:38:27What?
00:38:28And you just pissed off my boss.
00:38:32Well, Mr. Hawkins, I am truly sorry for everything that transpired here today.
00:38:37Uncle, what the hell?
00:38:38Are you telling me that this old fucking man is the owner of Maple fucking Airlines?
00:38:44There's no-
00:38:45Fuck me!
00:38:46Did you just call our boss a washed up old man?
00:38:49Fuck your boss?!
00:38:51Your boss is a fucking baggage boy!
00:38:53He's a fucking nobody!
00:38:55Fuck!
00:38:56Fuck!
00:38:57Fuck me!
00:38:58You're a goddamn fool.
00:38:59And your insane behavior towards Mr. Hawkins on his plane could've cost me my job!
00:39:06I'm sorry.
00:39:07I'm sorry!
00:39:08I didn't know it was him!
00:39:09I swear!
00:39:10We can't get you fired!
00:39:11Enough!
00:39:12Cain!
00:39:13Mr. Hawkins doesn't have time to watch you and your dipshit nephew bicker like boys in a playground.
00:39:22So I suggest you drag him away from here before I have these guards beat you both to a pulp.
00:39:27I'm sorry.
00:39:28I will escort him out of here immediately.
00:39:30Let's go!
00:39:31Oh!
00:39:32Fuck!
00:39:33Fuck!
00:39:34Okay!
00:39:35I'm sorry!
00:39:36I'm sorry!
00:39:37Please!
00:39:38Are you alright, Mr. Hawkins?
00:39:39You're not hurt, are you?
00:39:40No, I'm fine.
00:39:41Just an eventful evening.
00:39:43Now, stop worrying about me.
00:39:46And, uh, do me a favor.
00:39:48Have a shuttle for the passengers on board.
00:39:50I'm sure they are so exhausted after all they've been through.
00:39:53Yes, sir.
00:39:57Thank you so much again for today.
00:40:12If it wasn't for you, I...
00:40:14I don't know what would have happened.
00:40:16I'm glad I could help.
00:40:19Actually...
00:40:21I wanted to ask you about something else.
00:40:24What is it?
00:40:26Could you pretend to be my boyfriend tomorrow?
00:40:29Pretend to be, um, your boyfriend?
00:40:33You don't think I'm too old for you?
00:40:37I'm sure you've heard of the Grant family.
00:40:40Well, I'm their sole heiress, and that's why my dad is pressuring me to marry.
00:40:46But...
00:40:47I don't want to get married.
00:40:50Hence the looking for a fake boyfriend.
00:40:53I never would have guessed you were the Grant family heiress.
00:40:58Grant family heiress.
00:41:00It's a household name in New York.
00:41:02Yeah.
00:41:03Well, my dad told me that if I didn't bring a man home within three years, he'd find me a groom.
00:41:10And that was three years ago.
00:41:12But none of the fake boyfriends I've found are any good.
00:41:16Every time they find out who my dad is, they freak and back out.
00:41:20But you...
00:41:21You're different.
00:41:22I don't think you would let a little storm unnerve you.
00:41:23Little.
00:41:24Or big.
00:41:25I think you're the only man who could win over my father.
00:41:26I've never had an offer like this before.
00:41:27I'll do it.
00:41:28Really?
00:41:29Really?
00:41:30Really?
00:41:31Great.
00:41:32Um...
00:41:33Um...
00:41:34Um...
00:41:35Um...
00:41:36Um...
00:41:37Um...
00:41:38Um...
00:41:39Um...
00:41:40Um...
00:41:41Um...
00:41:42Um...
00:41:43Um...
00:41:44Um...
00:41:45Um...
00:41:46Um...
00:41:47Um...
00:41:48Um...
00:41:49Um...
00:41:50Um...
00:41:51Um...
00:41:52Um...
00:41:53Um...
00:41:54Um...
00:41:55Um...
00:41:56Um...
00:41:57There's just...
00:41:58One more thing.
00:41:59If you're gonna pretend to be my boyfriend, you're gonna have to act...
00:42:04Rich.
00:42:05Well...
00:42:06I am rich, so...
00:42:11It should be easy.
00:42:12Yes.
00:42:13Yes.
00:42:14That's the exact vibe I'm going for.
00:42:17Um...
00:42:18Um...
00:42:19Um...
00:42:20I think there's still enough room for improvement though.
00:42:24Okay, how about this. Could you dress like you make nine figures?
00:42:31Nine figures?
00:42:34Yeah, yeah, like your net worth is 300 million.
00:42:40300 million?
00:42:43Yeah, yeah, that's all I'm asking for.
00:42:46Okay, I'll see you here tomorrow at 2pm, okay?
00:42:51Don't be late.
00:42:53Shh.
00:42:59300 million?
00:43:01I'd make that much in a day.
00:43:06How am I supposed to downgrade?
00:43:12Evelyn, I don't understand why you insist on being a flight attendant when you could be living your best life as the Grant family are.
00:43:19I know, I mean, what do flight attendants make anyways?
00:43:2250k a year.
00:43:23My husband gives me more in spending money each week.
00:43:27See this bag?
00:43:28It's Chanel, limited edition.
00:43:31My husband bought it for me and there are only three of these on the entire planet Earth.
00:43:36When you inherit your father's money, you're going to be able to buy all three of those and then some.
00:43:40Wait, who said I'm going to inherit my father's fortune?
00:43:45I don't need my family's money.
00:43:47Fine, but if you're not going to take the inheritance for yourself, then at least find a handsome man to marry, pump out a few beautiful babies and leave the money for them.
00:43:57Yes, if you're trying to get away from your father, you might as well just have a family of your own.
00:44:02What do I look like to you? A baby making machine?
00:44:05If my dad really wants an heir, then he can have a kid himself.
00:44:09Ev, stop being so stubborn.
00:44:11Okay, trust me, you're going to like this next guy I'm setting you up with.
00:44:15Girl, he's in finance, he's 6'5", blue eyes, the works.
00:44:18If I didn't have a boyfriend, I would be all on that.
00:44:22Well, ladies, actually, I already have a boyfriend.
00:44:25What?
00:44:27You have a boyfriend?
00:44:31Ev, oh my God.
00:44:33Okay, I love this for you.
00:44:35You have to tell us which one of these elite families is he from.
00:44:38I mean, you have to introduce us.
00:44:40Yeah, well, he's a little older.
00:44:45But I'm already in love with him.
00:44:50Okay, you'll like him. Let's go meet him.
00:44:58Mr. Hawkins?
00:45:07Yeah, where is he?
00:45:09Making three absolute hotties like us wait around in a garage?
00:45:13Oh, some gentleman he is.
00:45:23Oh, why is that phone ringing?
00:45:26Hello?
00:45:27Oh! Oh, Jesus!
00:45:28This mechanic is a fucking creep!
00:45:30You disgusting pervert!
00:45:32I'm sorry, I did not mean to.
00:45:35Yeah, right, we all saw you, you greasy old fuck!
00:45:38I'm gonna gouge your goddamn eyes out!
00:45:42Miss, I promise I wasn't trying to do anything.
00:45:44No!
00:45:45Tell that to the cops!
00:45:47Mr. Hawkins!
00:45:49Wait, you know him?
00:45:51Mr. Hawkins, what were you doing under the car?
00:45:57Uh, well, I got here early and thought I'd take the car for a quick spend.
00:46:02When I got back you weren't here so I thought I'd check the engine.
00:46:06But, Mr. Hawkins, I thought I told you to dress like a rich man and not somebody who fixes cars for a living.
00:46:14Yeah, you told me my net worth was supposed to be $300 million?
00:46:17Yes, yes, so what on earth made you think that scruffy mechanic was the right look?
00:46:24$300 million is what I pay my engineer.
00:46:27This fits exactly what you asked for.
00:46:30Right, um, I was just really counting on you.
00:46:36If you pay your engineer so much money, imagine you have nicer clothes.
00:46:40Evelyn, this is his jumpsuit.
00:46:42I stopped by his place to pick it up on the way here.
00:46:44I thought this is what he wanted.
00:46:45Ahem, Ev?
00:46:48You aren't actually telling us that you know this dirt broke mechanic.
00:46:55Well, I don't just know him.
00:46:59He's my boyfriend.
00:47:00What?
00:47:04So, that billionaire that you were telling me about?
00:47:07That man?
00:47:09It's him?
00:47:11The grease monkey?
00:47:12Well, guys, I know he's a little bit rougher on the edges, but he's stacked. Like Jeff Bezos.
00:47:21This guy has that kind of money?
00:47:24I mean, is that so hard to believe?
00:47:27A highly sought after engineer.
00:47:31Yeah, freaking right.
00:47:33I mean, all I see standing in front of me is an oily old repairman.
00:47:37Screw this. This mechanic has got to be some kind of tender swindler.
00:47:41I've got to expose him.
00:47:42Ev, you can't actually be serious that you know this dirt broke mechanic.
00:47:49Evelyn, I'm your pick.
00:47:52So, you're the Grant family heiress.
00:47:56You have billions coming into your lap. Potentially.
00:48:00Um, what are you doing with this grease monkey?
00:48:05I think we're a perfect match.
00:48:08And I like him.
00:48:11And I want to be with him.
00:48:13So, there's that.
00:48:15Okay.
00:48:17Well, if you have so much fuck you money then,
00:48:21why didn't you bring any gifts for your girlfriend's cousins?
00:48:24Selina, that's a little rude.
00:48:26No, no, she's right.
00:48:28It would be impolite for me to show up empty handed.
00:48:32Of course I brought gifts for family.
00:48:37I wonder what that piece of shit swindler mechanic got us.
00:48:56Sir.
00:49:06Ladies.
00:49:08I present the newest limited edition Chanel handbags.
00:49:11There are only three of these in the whole wide world.
00:49:16Um, Crystal.
00:49:18Why do these three bags look identical to yours?
00:49:21No.
00:49:23My husband bought me this bag.
00:49:26I know.
00:49:30You dirty, broke-ass grease monkey.
00:49:33First, you lie to Evelyn and say that you're rich just so she'll date you.
00:49:38And now you show up here with these fake goods and shitty knockoff bags as gifts?
00:49:43Yes, these are real.
00:49:45My secretary personally delivered them to me just yesterday.
00:49:48Did he just say he has a secretary of all things?
00:49:52This dirty, low-down grease monkey would never have a secretary.
00:49:56That's crazy.
00:49:58Trust me, I insist.
00:50:01Evelyn, where the hell did you find this guy?
00:50:07I mean, it'd be one thing if he didn't provide us with gifts.
00:50:11We could chalk it up to him being forgetful or poor.
00:50:13But to show up here with these fake goods in order to try and trick us?
00:50:18That just proves he's trying to swindle your fortune.
00:50:24That just proves he's trying to swindle your fortune.
00:50:28Listen, I am not trying to swindle anybody.
00:50:31See, my secretary had these bags delivered on a private jet straight from the Chanel headquarters in London.
00:50:37But these are as real as it gets.
00:50:40And what? My bag is fake then?
00:50:44Listen, dumbass. See this? My husband bought me this bag.
00:50:48There are supposed to be only three of these on the entire planet Earth.
00:50:51But here, in this garage, there are four.
00:50:54Which means your bags are knockoffs.
00:50:57Eve, come on. It's clear that this man is playing you for a fool.
00:51:00Alright.
00:51:02You don't believe the bags are real?
00:51:05Confirm it.
00:51:06Confirm it.
00:51:13Bonjour, Mr. Hawkins.
00:51:15Lafayette.
00:51:16Vien too sweet et authentifié.
00:51:18C'est ça pour moi?
00:51:22Uh, bah oui, sir.
00:51:23Got it.
00:51:26Forget it, creep!
00:51:27Just take your knockoff bags and get out!
00:51:29Get out!
00:51:38It's raining money!
00:51:40How can a regular mechanic have so much money?
00:51:44Sir?
00:51:46Why is there cash in that bag?
00:51:50Sir?
00:51:52Why is there cash in this bag?
00:51:54Well, I didn't think that Simba Hammett would be quite enough and I didn't have enough time to prepare so I added a little extra on top of it.
00:52:03But sir, this is to watch.
00:52:07It's nothing, really.
00:52:09Okay, this has to be fake too.
00:52:13Alright, I've had enough with this man.
00:52:15First your background's fake, your job's fake.
00:52:17I bet you your hair's not even real.
00:52:19Selena!
00:52:21At least his hair's real.
00:52:22As real as the money on the floor.
00:52:25Yeah, back to that.
00:52:26You keep tricking us.
00:52:27Ev, this guy is no good.
00:52:29Ditch him!
00:52:31I promise.
00:52:33Everything is real.
00:52:34Just look closely.
00:52:36I...
00:52:37I think this is real.
00:52:39Well, if it is real, he probably robbed someone.
00:52:45Well, I'm still calling the cops.
00:52:52Bonjour, Mr. Hawkins!
00:52:57Ah, what the fuck? That's Lafayette Price. That's your Chanel's lead designer.
00:53:08Mr. Hawkins, you called and I'm right here.
00:53:10Lafayette, quick question.
00:53:12Mm-hmm?
00:53:13Those bags you gave me yesterday, you said there was only three in the whole world.
00:53:17That's right, sir.
00:53:18We've only made three of these bags and we gave them all to you.
00:53:22Well then, why is there a fourth right there?
00:53:26Right there.
00:53:29Pardon, madame, but would you mind if I took a look at your bag?
00:53:33Merci.
00:53:35Ooh la la, these counterfeits just keep getting worse and worse.
00:53:39Unbelievable.
00:53:41Mr. Hawkins, this is truly an awful knockoff.
00:53:45The stitch work is amateur at best, and they did not even get the logo right.
00:53:50But my husband bought me that bag. He would never get me a fake bag.
00:53:53Madame, a man who buys you a cheap trash like this isn't worth your time.
00:53:59If I were you, I'd get those divorce papers ready.
00:54:04Okay.
00:54:05Lafayette, merci pour ton aide.
00:54:08Abierto.
00:54:10Au revoir.
00:54:16Do you believe me now?
00:54:17Whoa, whoa, whoa. Who started the party without me?
00:54:30Evelyn, this is Xavier. He's the hotshot race car driver I was telling you about.
00:54:35So, you're Evelyn. And you must be her father.
00:54:39Oh, Xavier, no, this is not Evelyn's father.
00:54:46If he's not? Then why do they look so close?
00:54:52Because he's my boyfriend.
00:54:54Boyfriend? Evelyn, what the fuck is going on here?
00:54:58Uh, what, do I need your permission to date someone?
00:55:01Evelyn, I come here today to see you and you bring this wrinkly old boomer who you claim is your boyfriend?
00:55:08Are you trying to embarrass me?
00:55:11Are you trying to embarrass me?
00:55:16What does me being her boyfriend have to do with you?
00:55:18Shut it, old fart.
00:55:20I don't waste my breath answering no-name mechanics.
00:55:23Listen, old man, either you break it off with Evelyn or I make you disappear overnight. What's it gonna be?
00:55:36Xavier's from one of the top families in New York City. If you don't do what he says, he'll fucking finish you.
00:55:43Evelyn, are you for real?
00:55:45Xavier's got it all. He's young, he's handsome, he's got a lot going for him.
00:55:49What does Josh, John...
00:55:53Jet.
00:55:54Whatever, have that he doesn't?
00:55:56He's got all together.
00:55:58All I see is a pathetic jerk who's running around spending his daddy's money on gambling, cookers and drugs.
00:56:05So, what's a little fun? You know, work hard, play hard.
00:56:09Besides, check this out.
00:56:12Xavier finished a lap in 38 seconds.
00:56:14That's one of the top ten lap times of the racetrack.
00:56:19Wow, 38 seconds?
00:56:23Xavier, you're gonna be a NASCAR star in no time.
00:56:2638 second lap time is not bad on this track.
00:56:31See, when I was younger, I was doing laps faster than that without breaking a sweat.
00:56:35But, you know, I guess there's always improvement for a novice like you.
00:56:43I guess there's always improvement for a novice like you.
00:56:47Faster than 38 seconds? Give me a break, old man.
00:56:52That screen shows the top times ever recorded at this racetrack.
00:56:56If you were really faster, your name would be above mine.
00:57:01Stop being mean to him!
00:57:03He saved me, many times.
00:57:06Saved you?
00:57:08So, old man, you really think you're a speed star?
00:57:14Do a lap.
00:57:16Prove it.
00:57:18I don't need to prove anything.
00:57:20See that screen?
00:57:22The time at the top of the list is mine.
00:57:26The top of the list?
00:57:3029 seconds?
00:57:32So you're saying that you got the top recorded speed in history here at Godspeed Racetrack?
00:57:38The top recorded speed in history here at Godspeed Racetrack?
00:57:42Well, that's not all.
00:57:45Back in the day, my name used to fill every spot on that leaderboard.
00:57:49But as I got older, I started taking my foot off the gas.
00:57:52I want to give young hotshots like you a chance to shine.
00:57:56That's hilarious!
00:57:58So you're saying you used to be a racer?
00:58:02Come on, you're just a filthy repairman.
00:58:05When could you even afford your own car?
00:58:07A car? This old man can't even afford a used bike.
00:58:11Ev, your senior citizen boyfriend is a pathological liar.
00:58:15I can't trust a thing he says.
00:58:18Mr. Hawkins, you don't have to put up an act. You can just be yourself.
00:58:25I am being myself.
00:58:27Congratulations to Xavier Gordon on recording a top 10 lap time in the history of Godspeed Racetrack.
00:58:32As a reward, you will receive a generous cash prize of $10 million.
00:58:35Oh my god, congrats Xavier! There hasn't been a name on the top 10 list in over a decade.
00:58:47Trust me, I'm just getting started.
00:58:50Geez, a 38 second lap time is only good for 10th of all time.
00:59:03Whoever housed the times before must be a generational talent.
00:59:06Those are the guys from yesterday, but I'm up now.
00:59:09And you better believe, I'm coming for their heads.
00:59:13Yeah, see that old man? Xavier's name is going down in history.
00:59:17Who the fuck are you to compare yourself to him?
00:59:21Mr. Hawkins, I was trying to tell you, you can't keep up this act forever.
00:59:28Just look.
00:59:30What a joke! This old man fixes cars. I race them.
00:59:35Just look.
00:59:36What? Why do they all say jet? What did you do, you old schmuck? You probably paid someone to fix the rankings, didn't you?
00:59:54Has it not occurred to you that maybe those lap times are really high?
00:59:59Honestly, it's impressive you were even able to make a top 10 time with an entry level race car.
01:00:05Entry level race car?!
01:00:07If you are going to claim to be a racer, you better know the first thing about cars.
01:00:12This is a Jaguar i7 custom. I dropped 5 million bucks on it.
01:00:18This old geezer who fixes cars can't tell a gem when he sees one. The only thing he should be repairing is his own brain.
01:00:28I've driven this Jaguar before. The handling on it is some of the worst I've ever seen.
01:00:33I'm actually surprised a beginner like you didn't crash it.
01:00:35Did I just hear a greasy old repairman refer to me? A prize winning racer? As a beginner?
01:00:44Just you wait, buddy. I'm going to buy a new car and when I do, my name is going to shoot to the top of the chart.
01:00:51New car, huh?
01:00:53Let me know if you need any help. I'd be more than happy to contact a dealership for you.
01:00:58That's hilarious. I'm friends with Ivan, the top race car dealership in Vegas.
01:01:07The last thing I need is your help.
01:01:12The last thing I need is your help.
01:01:15You're friends with Ivan? The billionaire who gets exclusive sales to the newest top tier race cars?
01:01:22Wow. I didn't know you knew Ivan.
01:01:26Yeah, go ahead, give him a call.
01:01:28I'm looking to buy a new car from him too.
01:01:30Fuck! I shouldn't have talked to such a big game.
01:01:34I've only brushed shoulders with Ivan once and we didn't even speak.
01:01:38If I call this guy, he'll expose me.
01:01:41Or... do you not have his number?
01:01:44What? Ivan and I are day ones.
01:01:47And you say you want to buy a new car? Can't you even afford one with your meager mechanic's salary?
01:01:55Weird. It's straight to voicemail.
01:01:58Probably has his phone off. I'll talk to him next time.
01:02:02I wanted to meet the legend.
01:02:04Ugh, I mean, meeting Ivan in real life would be so surreal.
01:02:09Oh, but it's probably for the best that Ivan doesn't see this disgusting mechanic anyways.
01:02:15He can't be associating and mingling with such repairman.
01:02:20Let's give Ivan a call. See if he agrees.
01:02:28Ivan.
01:02:30Yeah, it's me.
01:02:32Listen, can you come by the racetrack?
01:02:35Yeah, I'm with a guy who really wants to buy a car from you.
01:02:38Yeah, and actually, I was thinking about buying a new car from you myself.
01:02:44Yeah, the racetrack.
01:02:46Great.
01:02:48I'll see you soon.
01:02:50That... was an Oscar-worthy performance.
01:02:55Thank you. Oscar-worthy.
01:02:57Oh, please. If Ivan didn't answer the phone for Xavier, why would he answer the phone for you?
01:03:04Guys, this grease monkey is running us through a loop.
01:03:08He probably wasn't even on the phone.
01:03:10Just standing there, talking to no one.
01:03:12Oh, you think so?
01:03:15Well, when Ivan shows up in the next few minutes, let's just see if I was still talking to myself.
01:03:22In the next few minutes?
01:03:24Who the hell are you to claim that you know Ivan?
01:03:27Let's just wait and see.
01:03:32I've had enough of your empty posturing, buddy.
01:03:36That guy is my brother from another mother.
01:03:40So, I know him well enough than to ask him to carve out time in his busy schedule to come down here to this dusty garage.
01:03:48If you think that he's gonna drop everything to meet you, you're out of your goddamn mind.
01:03:53He's right. Ivan's a multi-billionaire. He's got places to go and people to see.
01:04:00He can't just be seen mingling here with you dirt old repairman.
01:04:05Ivan always makes time for me.
01:04:07I brought a lot of business to his dealership for the past few years.
01:04:10That's the least he can do.
01:04:12Like what? Asking for car parts?
01:04:15I mean, I must have bought like 25 cars or so within the last few years.
01:04:23Okay, you bought 25 cars from now? What do you mean? And like Hot Wheels?
01:04:28Evelyn, I'm getting tired of your boyfriend's shit.
01:04:32Either he shuts his mouth or we leave.
01:04:34Ivan!
01:04:38Nice to see you.
01:04:39Hi, it's so nice to meet you.
01:04:40Hi, thanks to you.
01:04:42Mr. Hawkins. It's been a while. Ivan.
01:04:45I don't understand. Why did he just go right past Xavier and go straight to this slimeball?
01:04:47Ivan!
01:04:49Nice to see you.
01:04:51Hi, it's so nice to meet you.
01:04:53Hi, nice to meet you.
01:04:55Mr. Hawkins.
01:04:57It's been a while. Ivan.
01:04:59I don't understand. Why did he just
01:05:01go right past Xavier and go straight to
01:05:03this slimeball? Yeah, I thought you guys were
01:05:05supposed to be friends.
01:05:07So, so did I.
01:05:09Ivan, no.
01:05:11This guy behind you, he
01:05:13tried calling you, but it went straight to voicemail.
01:05:15What was that about?
01:05:17Oh, that, yes.
01:05:19I get a lot of calls from
01:05:21small-time racers who are too broke to
01:05:23actually afford a car. Eventually,
01:05:25I got sick of it, so I stopped answering altogether.
01:05:27But Ivan,
01:05:29I mean, you picked up
01:05:31right away when I called
01:05:33you. Of course.
01:05:35That's because you're you.
01:05:37I have a separate phone and a separate phone
01:05:39number just for when you call.
01:05:41No one else even has it.
01:05:43Classic Ivan.
01:05:45Well, you've always known how to treat
01:05:47your top clients.
01:05:49That's what sets your business apart.
01:05:51Absolutely, Mr. Hawkins.
01:05:53So, you said that you were in the market for a new car.
01:05:55Do you have anything particular in mind?
01:05:57Yeah, well, I like the
01:05:59look of the latest Lamborghini.
01:06:01Didn't you just get the first one in stock?
01:06:03Why don't you have someone send it over?
01:06:05Absolutely, we'll take care of that right away.
01:06:07Thank you, Ivan.
01:06:09Xavier here also wants to buy a car from you.
01:06:11Xavier, who's that?
01:06:13I don't know.
01:06:15That guy.
01:06:17He said you two were brothers from another mother?
01:06:19Who the hell is that?
01:06:23I'm Xavier.
01:06:25I'm Xavier.
01:06:26Don't you remember me?
01:06:27Six.
01:06:28No.
01:06:29Anyway, you said you were looking for a car.
01:06:31What kind of car would you like?
01:06:32Yeah.
01:06:33Do you have any Porsche 718s in stock?
01:06:36No, we don't carry those.
01:06:37All right.
01:06:38Do you have the newest Gran Turismo?
01:06:41Yeah.
01:06:42That would also be a no.
01:06:44Sir, forgive my bluntness, but you run the top dealership in the States.
01:06:48Shouldn't you offer a wider selection?
01:06:51Listen, Sean, Cody, Zack, Xavier, whatever your name is, my dealership only sells Uber
01:06:59luxury supercars.
01:07:01Just compare the cars that Mr. Hawkins buys to the ones that you're talking about and I
01:07:05think you'll see the difference.
01:07:06The bottom line is if you only have one or two million dollars to spend, then perhaps
01:07:11you should take your business somewhere else.
01:07:13Mr. Hawkins, is he saying that a two million dollar car is not available for his dealership?
01:07:22Uh, yeah.
01:07:23Pretty much all of Ivan's cars run ten million dollars or more.
01:07:27Ten million?
01:07:28That's insane.
01:07:29Well, then Ivan's dealership definitely doesn't have anything on Xavier's budget.
01:07:34Fine!
01:07:35I don't need your shitty dealership anyway.
01:07:38I'll just go to another place with more variety.
01:07:40If you had told me that you only had a one or two million dollar budget, then I would have
01:07:45sent you to any old run of the mill auto dealer instead of standing here wasting my time.
01:07:53Mr. Hawkins, we will have your Lamborghini delivered to you right away.
01:07:59Ivan, it's always a pleasure.
01:08:01Thank you, sir.
01:08:02If you and Ivan are friends, why did he completely ignore you?
01:08:09Uh, well...
01:08:13Guys, isn't it obvious?
01:08:16Xavier and Ivan were never friends.
01:08:19He didn't even know him.
01:08:21He was just lying to us.
01:08:22Why would Xavier lie to us?
01:08:24You know what's more possible?
01:08:26Is the person that was just here isn't even the real Ivan.
01:08:30Yeah, that's exactly it.
01:08:31That wasn't even the real Ivan.
01:08:33Okay.
01:08:34Um...
01:08:35Yeah.
01:08:36Who was he then?
01:08:37How should we know?
01:08:38He probably picked up a random impersonator off the street.
01:08:42Wow.
01:08:43I mean, honestly, I am impressed.
01:08:47I mean, the mental gymnastics on display here are really remarkable.
01:08:52Cut the bullshit.
01:08:53Here's the truth.
01:08:54You're a piss poor auto mechanic who used his entire month's salary hiring some guy off the street to come here and make you look cool.
01:09:02So, stop acting big and copying that you got a Lamborghini when we know the truth that you're a fucking bike commuter.
01:09:12Mr. Hawking, the car you requested has aroused at the track. Would you like to take it for a test drive?
01:09:22Absolutely. Bring it to the garage.
01:09:25So, that was your new Lamborghini?
01:09:31Man, he's gonna look like an idiot when that never shows up.
01:09:35Oh my god! Okay, this can't be happening.
01:09:55No freaking way. This just dropped on the market for like 30 million dollars. I can't believe this mechanic had that kind of pull.
01:10:02Mr. Hawkins, is this really the car you're buying?
01:10:06That's right.
01:10:07But it costs 30 million dollars. How could you buy it without even batting an eye?
01:10:13That's a mid-range purchase for me.
01:10:15I have plenty of cars in my collection.
01:10:17No fucking way! I refuse to believe that this garage worker could afford this car!
01:10:25Well, who's it for? You?
01:10:28The point is, this isn't yours. Look at you in your greasy jumpsuit. A guy like you would never get behind the wheel of a car like that.
01:10:40Xavier, Mr. Hawkins bought it from Ivan. Right in front of your eyes. How can you still not believe him?
01:10:46That wasn't the real Ivan.
01:10:48I knew an auto mechanic like you could never afford a 30 million dollar race car like that.
01:10:53This is just all part of your charade to show off your fuck you money.
01:10:56Really?
01:10:58And to think I almost fell for your lies.
01:11:01Mr. Hawkins already proven himself. If you don't believe him, then I don't know what to tell you.
01:11:07He didn't prove fucking shit! You know, I've got an idea. This car has the new AI hologram built into it, doesn't it?
01:11:17Well, if it's really your car, only you would be able to activate it.
01:11:23Yes, it should.
01:11:26Rise and shine, Lambo.
01:11:30Hello. How may I help you?
01:11:33Lambo. Come here.
01:11:42Oh my God. That's the coolest feature I've ever seen in a car.
01:11:46That's the first Lamborghini with a speech recognition system.
01:11:50So do you believe me now?
01:11:53Oh, come on. Big deal. All it proves is that the voice recognition works.
01:11:57It just proves that it's working properly.
01:12:00Xavier, really? He doesn't just recognize any voice. It works for the owner. No one else.
01:12:06Fine. It is his car. What kind of man would buy this Barbie land bullshit?
01:12:12Who are you to judge what colors Mr. Hawkins likes? This is the one they had in stock. Pink.
01:12:19It's probably the first one that hit the market.
01:12:21Or maybe he didn't have enough money to customize it.
01:12:24Or, more like, he's renting the car.
01:12:28Well, either way, you shouldn't doubt him based on something so trivial.
01:12:32I don't give a fuck what you say. This is a woman's car.
01:12:37Finally you said something right. This car is for a woman.
01:12:45Ha! He did admit it. See? This car isn't his.
01:12:49The old man finally ran out of tricks. Took him long enough.
01:12:52Evelyn, what do you think of this car?
01:12:55I love it.
01:12:59It's yours.
01:13:01Mine?
01:13:03Go ahead and talk to her.
01:13:08Hello, Lambo.
01:13:09Hello, Evelyn. I'm your new Lamborghini. Please get in.
01:13:25Listen, a Lamborghini supercar just showed up at the Godspeed racetrack.
01:13:31I need to know who its owner is.
01:13:33The Lamborghini you're asking about was bought with a car under the name of Prince Corp's CEO.
01:13:37Prince Corp? Isn't that the top financial firm in the States?
01:13:41Wait a minute. I know the CEO.
01:13:44It's Damien!
01:13:46That's right, sir.
01:13:48I knew it! He's the only one who could afford something like this.
01:13:52I bought this car with my own money. What's going on?
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