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The Last Leg - Season 33 Episode 11 - The Last Leg Of Christmas
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00:00Thank you for letting us be ourselves, so don't mind me if I repeat myself, these simple lines be good for your health, and keep them trying when I'm on the shelf, live my life like you just don't care, 5,000 leaders never scared, radio noise is the moment they fear, get up, you're still a beautiful idea, get up, throw your hands in the air, get up, you're shit in the air.
00:30Finish wrapping the presents, sit back on the couch, then realise you forgot to buy batteries, it's Christmas Eve, and it's time for the last leg.
00:47Tonight on the show we look at a prediction of Christmas future, look back on Christmas past, and take a sneaky look at our Christmas presents.
00:56Plus we'll be joined by presenter Alison Hammond, comedian Harry Hill, and music legend Rick Astley, on the show that's always a Christmas diehard.
01:05G'day, I'm Adam Hills, welcome to The Last Leg, the show that wonders if King Charles' speech is going to get one less viewer this year.
01:20With me as always of the pride of Huddersfield, Alex Brooker, and the man who turned on the Christmas lights in Exeter this year, but only in his own house, Josh Whittacombe.
01:27APPLAUSE
01:29Happy Christmas Eve, everybody. Every year we dress up, there's something ridiculous for Christmas.
01:35I, of course, am Tom Hanks from the Polar Express. There you go.
01:41Thank you. Yeah, it's not bad. You're such a fan of the film that you've called the character Tom Hanks.
01:49LAUGHTER
01:54You look like you're about to strip.
01:57LAUGHTER
01:59That is a different type of Polar Express.
02:02LAUGHTER
02:05I went with Polar Express because it's my favourite Tom Hanks film.
02:08Actually, it's my second favourite but Philadelphia didn't feel appropriate.
02:11LAUGHTER
02:13Merry Christmas!
02:15Josh, would you like to explain who you're dressed as?
02:18Oh, I didn't get the memo. I didn't know it was fancy dress.
02:21LAUGHTER
02:22No, I've come as... I'll stand up for this.
02:25I've come as Francis Rossi from the Band-Aid video.
02:29LAUGHTER
02:31I'm not saying I've run out of ideas.
02:35LAUGHTER
02:36I look like Michael Portillo.
02:38LAUGHTER
02:40You look like someone who's been caught at Heathrow trying to smuggle in illegal reptiles.
02:45LAUGHTER
02:48Well, I've certainly got a snake in these tight trousers.
02:51LAUGHTER
02:52Hey...
02:54Um, Alex, do you want to explain what's going on there?
02:56Yeah, I'm Tim Allen in the Santa Claus.
02:59Santa's just fallen off my roof and I've just put the jacket on.
03:02So, yeah, and also, I'll tell you what, it's comfy and neat.
03:05I'll tell you what, your snake will be all right in these pyjama bottoms, mate, honestly.
03:08LAUGHTER
03:09This is the comfiest I've ever been.
03:11I'm not going to say you've not gone too much effort, but compared to the two of us...
03:14Wearing, literally, slippers, pyjamas, and just, you've put on a Santa...
03:18Yeah, I know.
03:19I think these are comfy slippers.
03:21I can only feel the one, but I think...
03:23LAUGHTER
03:25Um, all right, the big story, of course, is Christmas!
03:28CHEERING
03:29It's the story Alex has been most excited about all year.
03:32So, let's start with this.
03:33Is it OK that Alex interrupted a last leg meeting this year
03:37to have his Christmas tree delivered?
03:40LAUGHTER
03:41OK, is it OK he did that in October?
03:44LAUGHTER
03:47Well, here's another is it OK for you.
03:48Is it OK that it's a 13-foot tree?
03:52That is...
03:53I know, that's 12 more feet than Alex has.
03:55LAUGHTER
03:58Let's see, here's a photo of it arriving.
04:01LAUGHTER
04:02Just so you know, Alex took the tree out,
04:04and then once that was done,
04:05Alex's wife put all her belongings in there and there.
04:08LAUGHTER
04:11Here's the photo of the tree once it was up and running.
04:14Dude, it's so...
04:15Fucking hell!
04:16It looks like, you know those North Korean marches
04:19where they have the missiles?
04:21LAUGHTER
04:22Honestly, it's so big, that's an actual star.
04:25LAUGHTER
04:26Is it a real tree?
04:27Is it a real tree?
04:28It's not a real tree.
04:29Oh, no, no, no, no, no.
04:30No, so even your Christmas tree's prosthetic.
04:32LAUGHTER
04:38Look, knowing how much you love Christmas,
04:40I would imagine the ads you get on your phone
04:43are different to the ads I get on my phone.
04:45Oh, mate, I mean, the algorithm on Instagram,
04:48I start getting loads of these, like, Christmas,
04:50like, leery Christmas suits and outfits.
04:53Right.
04:54Maybe because I was talking about Christmas jumpers.
04:56That's all my algorithm, it's just Christmas suits.
04:58Yeah, we've got some of the garish images
05:00Alex has been getting, check these out.
05:02The thing with it is, you two complain a lot, you know,
05:05about your disabilities, but that guy in the suit,
05:08he hasn't got a head.
05:09LAUGHTER
05:12It looks like I...
05:14I'd say that's far away.
05:16At the Paralympics, you're in the toughest category.
05:19LAUGHTER
05:20Yeah, especially if it's a dead heat in the sprinting.
05:22LAUGHTER
05:23The suit... I love the suit.
05:28It looks like the kind of suit Santa would wear to court.
05:30LAUGHTER
05:31You know what I mean?
05:32Like if Santa turned up in the Epstein files.
05:35LAUGHTER
05:36No, Santa's not...
05:37Obviously Santa's not in the Epstein files.
05:39Obviously.
05:40Cos we all know Santa makes the list and checks it twice.
05:43LAUGHTER
05:45I reckon...
05:46Pausing for an edit...
05:48LAUGHTER
05:49I...
05:54I...
05:55I...
05:56I...
05:57I think nothing says Christmas Eve more than
05:58Philadelphia and the Epstein files.
06:01LAUGHTER
06:03I reckon if you can encapsulate Alex's algorithm
06:05into one image, it would be this.
06:07Declan Rice dressed as Santa drinking a Frosé with Big John.
06:10LAUGHTER
06:11That is...
06:12That's Alex's...
06:13I'm assuming that's your default setting
06:15when you blank out during a meeting.
06:16LAUGHTER
06:17Is it true you want a dash cam for Christmas?
06:20Yeah, I do.
06:21Yeah, I genuinely do.
06:22I've got bang...
06:23So...
06:24I've got bang into, um...
06:25Dash cam footage.
06:26That's the other thing my algorithm is jumping up.
06:27What do you mean?
06:28So, like, I've got really into, like,
06:30watching these videos
06:31of, like, just people having near misses.
06:33But the one I've been getting into most
06:35is a geezer called, uh, Big Jobber.
06:37Who basically...
06:38What, what, what, what?
06:39His name's Big Jobber.
06:40And basically what he does is...
06:41I'm going to say it, Hillsy.
06:42When Brooker searched Big Jobber,
06:43he wasn't looking for a dash cam footage.
06:45LAUGHTER
06:48He assesses, like, the insurance library
06:51who's at fault for the crash
06:52based on the dash cam footage.
06:54Are you OK?
06:55And I just see it...
06:56I think I'm having, like,
06:57the most boring midlife crisis of all time.
07:01But I really want a dash cam.
07:03We've got a very special treat for Alex tonight.
07:05So we've been following Santa on his radar tonight.
07:07Oh, OK.
07:08So we're going to check in to see where he is right now.
07:10Have a look at this on the map.
07:12He...
07:13Now, that seems to be Huddersfield,
07:15which is where you live, Alex.
07:16Yeah.
07:17He seems to be stuck there.
07:19Um, let's go to Santa's dash cam,
07:21or as he calls it, dasher cam,
07:23to see what's happening.
07:25What arsehole put up a 12-foot tree?
07:32Look, they don't breathalise me.
07:34I've had 83 million cherries.
07:36Here's your foes machine, you prick.
07:39LAUGHTER
07:42Now, one AI generator reimagined Santa over the decades,
07:48showing how, and this is a quote,
07:50beloved figures can evolve alongside society's progress.
07:53Here is its revealing timeline of Santas.
07:56Let's go through them one by one.
07:58Here's 1960 Santa.
07:59Textbook.
08:00Classic.
08:01Classic Santa.
08:02Coca-Cola Santa.
08:03No issue with that, yeah.
08:04Yep.
08:051970 Santa.
08:06Ooh.
08:07I've...
08:08I'm not letting my kids sit on his knee.
08:11LAUGHTER
08:13Uh, let's look at 1980s Santa.
08:15Wow.
08:16He's been lifting his sack, eh?
08:19LAUGHTER
08:20It's no wonder Mummy was kissing Santa Claus.
08:22Look at that guy.
08:23I mean, that'll leave her Saint Nicholas.
08:25LAUGHTER
08:28LAUGHTER
08:30LAUGHTER
08:31Did somebody just go,
08:32Oh, dear!
08:34LAUGHTER
08:36LAUGHTER
08:38I enjoyed it!
08:39Oh, dear!
08:40That from me...
08:41Do you know what?
08:42I'm not...
08:43It's gonna...
08:44It's ruined Christmas.
08:45LAUGHTER
08:46And that's a guy who was fine with the Epstein joke.
08:49LAUGHTER
08:50Uh, 2010 Santa?
08:52Couldn't give a shit, could I?
08:54No.
08:55LAUGHTER
08:562030s?
08:57Well, I tell you what,
08:58JK Rowling's not gonna be happy from 2030s.
09:01LAUGHTER
09:02LAUGHTER
09:03LAUGHTER
09:04LAUGHTER
09:05Oh, dear.
09:06LAUGHTER
09:07LAUGHTER
09:08LAUGHTER
09:09Look, there's one in the audience!
09:10LAUGHTER
09:11How did that happen?
09:13APPLAUSE
09:14LAUGHTER
09:15APPLAUSE
09:16LAUGHTER
09:17Mate!
09:18It's the one fucking night you work!
09:21LAUGHTER
09:22LAUGHTER
09:23I'm not so sure about 2050 Santa.
09:25I mean, no...
09:26I mean, he looks like he's gonna shoot the naughty boys again.
09:29LAUGHTER
09:30And look, as Santa faces an AI future,
09:32so does the art of gift-giving,
09:33cos surveys have found
09:34that a lot of people are using generative AI
09:36for present ideas.
09:38I love the idea that tomorrow there's gonna be men everywhere
09:41blaming AI for misjudged gifts for their other halves.
09:44LAUGHTER
09:45LAUGHTER
09:46I mean...
09:47Jack GPT just said anal beads, I don't even know why!
09:50LAUGHTER
09:51Like, the technology's just not...
09:53It's just not right.
09:54By the way, love, do us a favour,
09:55can you quickly ring your mum
09:56and tell her not to open us?
09:58LAUGHTER
09:59LAUGHTER
10:00LAUGHTER
10:01LAUGHTER
10:02So, we've decided to use AI tonight
10:04to choose our presents for each other.
10:06Uh, and to deliver them,
10:07would you please welcome,
10:08all the way from the future,
10:09Robot Santa!
10:11APPLAUSE
10:12Santa, baby,
10:13yes, little saviour
10:15and the virtue
10:17for me
10:19I mean, the technology in the future's amazing, isn't it?
10:30I tell you what,
10:31the robot's improved more than the trolley, hasn't it?
10:34LAUGHTER
10:37It's not often I get to say this about other people,
10:39but you do walk a bit funny, don't you?
10:41LAUGHTER
10:43Can the robot do the Vs towards Alex?
10:48LAUGHTER
10:50LAUGHTER
10:52All right, so we started by asking AI the question,
10:54what is a good Christmas present for Alex Brooker?
10:56Now, once we explained who Alex Brooker was...
10:58LAUGHTER
11:00LAUGHTER
11:02LAUGHTER
11:04It suggested a personalised Arsenal jersey.
11:06Yes, please.
11:07Could you please bring the presents over?
11:10LAUGHTER
11:13Do you know what?
11:14Yeah.
11:15Radha is fucking good, isn't it?
11:16LAUGHTER
11:17LAUGHTER
11:24LAUGHTER
11:25Four years of debt for this!
11:26LAUGHTER
11:28Thank you very much.
11:30I think that's yours.
11:31It's good to have Daniel Day-Lewis back in the game, isn't it?
11:34LAUGHTER
11:35Oh, wow.
11:36Unbelievable!
11:37No, back a bit, there we go.
11:39Oh, there we go.
11:41Thank you, Robot Santa.
11:43LAUGHTER
11:45They said...
11:46Do you know what?
11:47When they said Greg Wallace would never be back on TV...
11:49LAUGHTER
11:51APPLAUSE
11:57LAUGHTER
11:58LAUGHTER
12:01So, I started out by asking AI what to get for Alex...
12:04Yes.
12:05..and it said a personalised Arsenal jersey.
12:07Am I allowed to open it?
12:08You are allowed to open it.
12:09Oh, wow.
12:10So, we've got you an Arsenal jersey,
12:11and on the back we've got the picture of you, er,
12:14with Declan Rice and Big John drinking the Frosé.
12:17Oh, yes, please.
12:18APPLAUSE
12:19Merry Christmas.
12:20APPLAUSE
12:22I love this robot.
12:23He did a little...
12:24He did a little happy dance when it was good.
12:26LAUGHTER
12:27So, when...
12:28When I asked...
12:29LAUGHTER
12:31How is the robot funnier than all of us?
12:33LAUGHTER
12:34This is the future, Josh.
12:35LAUGHTER
12:36LAUGHTER
12:37So, when I asked AI what to get Josh,
12:39it said, er,
12:41something that balances his sober lifestyle,
12:43his love of home, his writing work,
12:45and his comedic vibe.
12:46Oh, that's genuinely nice.
12:48It said,
12:49a premium tea gift set and notebook combo
12:52with a personal note.
12:54So, it's...
12:55And AI wrote the note.
12:57Oh.
12:58This is a personal note.
12:59For when you fancy putting the kettle on...
13:01I genuinely like this.
13:02For when you fancy putting the kettle on
13:03and jamming down those five-minute observations.
13:06LAUGHTER
13:08This is the great thing.
13:09It also added, er,
13:10Josh is an observational comedian
13:12who focuses on the minutiae of everyday life
13:15rather than big topical issues.
13:17LAUGHTER
13:18I think anyone who's seen me trying to walk around the news
13:22on this show would agree with that.
13:24LAUGHTER
13:25And so, what did AI suggest for me?
13:28Well, AI, they got...
13:30So, basically, they said,
13:31something that was tied to your interest
13:32in disability awareness and sport,
13:34but more importantly,
13:35a high-quality item that acknowledges that part of his life,
13:38but not in a pitying way.
13:40They wanted us to give you something empowering.
13:42Not in a pitying way?
13:44No, so we didn't want to get you any sort of present
13:46that would kind of sound pitying at all.
13:49OK.
13:50So, we've got you, er, a book.
13:52You have got me a book.
13:53Which is called, um,
13:54The Little Disabled Engine That Could.
13:57LAUGHTER
13:59APPLAUSE
14:01Thank you so much, boys.
14:02I can add that to my collection,
14:03along with C-Spot Limp.
14:05LAUGHTER
14:07Oh, the places you'll park.
14:09LAUGHTER
14:10And can we also have a big thank you to Robot Santa!
14:14CHEERING
14:20Now, Christmas telly is also changing.
14:22There's a reality series on Hallmark this year
14:24called Finding Mr Christmas.
14:26The TV show focuses on ten aspiring actors
14:29who compete for the chance to be the next leading man
14:31in a Hallmark Christmas film.
14:33Here is the cheesy trailer for the wholesome reality series.
14:38Boy, do I have an early holiday gift for you.
14:40We are back for season two
14:42with an all-new group of hunks
14:44and festive face-offs.
14:45Check out this sneak peek.
14:46It's a huge house.
14:48I'm down to stay here for a while.
14:49What's up, guys?
14:50What's up, fellas?
14:51What's up, Angel?
14:52Dude, it's so epic.
14:54Dude, we got the trust circle going on already.
14:57LAUGHTER
14:59I don't trust that trust circle.
15:01LAUGHTER
15:03Have you seen Finding Mr Easter?
15:05It's a bit bleaker because the winner gets nailed to a cross.
15:08LAUGHTER
15:10LAUGHTER
15:15Now...
15:16LAUGHTER
15:18Throughout the show...
15:19LAUGHTER
15:21Sorry, it's the latest photo-edgy for you.
15:23LAUGHTER
15:24Honestly, you're just...
15:26Everything you say with that ponytail!
15:28LAUGHTER
15:29Now, throughout the show, this Finding Mr Christmas...
15:32Did you just get a cut away of my fucking pony?
15:35LAUGHTER
15:36We've never used that camera angle in 15 years!
15:39LAUGHTER
15:41That's not one of our angles!
15:43LAUGHTER
15:44Where's that?
15:45I don't even know where that camera is!
15:47LAUGHTER
15:48Throughout Finding Mr Christmas,
15:49the actors had to complete a series of challenges,
15:52including gift wrapping,
15:53untangling Christmas lights and acting in a scene,
15:55but we think they missed a trick,
15:57because we've got our own Mr Christmas here, Alex Brooker.
16:00I don't know why they didn't cast him, right?
16:02100%, mate.
16:03Yep.
16:04So, throughout the show tonight,
16:05we're going to set Alex a series of Christmassy tasks,
16:07and he's going to do the first one now.
16:09We need you to head over there, please, Alex.
16:11I didn't...
16:12Oh, all right.
16:13Are you ready? Are you ready?
16:18It's based on this festive challenge.
16:21LAUGHTER
16:22Remember, guys, presentation is important,
16:24but your personality and star quality
16:27are always on Santa's radar.
16:30Ooh!
16:31So, give us your best runway walks and slay!
16:34Yeah!
16:35Yeah!
16:36Link, you're up first.
16:38Yeah!
16:39Ooh!
16:40Ooh!
16:41Ooh!
16:42Ooh!
16:43Ooh!
16:44Okay, hello!
16:45Melissa, I don't want you to get too close to this fire.
16:47Sugar melts.
16:48Oh!
16:49Oh!
16:50Wow!
16:52So, it's time for Alex to take on the Mr Christmas catwalk challenge.
17:01Alex, I want some strut with a Goodwill to All Men vibe.
17:09CHEERING
17:11Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.
17:15Uh, genuinely, by the way, don't get too close to me,
17:27cos I think this is flammable as fuck.
17:29LAUGHTER
17:30Alex, you're through to the next round.
17:33Yeah!
17:34CHEERING
17:36All right, let's welcome tonight's guests.
17:41They're Bake Off royalty, which means much like real royalty,
17:44they're both inbred.
17:45Please welcome Alison Hammond and comedian Harry Hill!
17:48CHEERING
17:49AND APPLAUSE
17:50AND APPLAUSE
17:51AND APPLAUSE
17:52AND APPLAUSE
17:53AND APPLAUSE
17:54AND APPLAUSE
17:55AND APPLAUSE
17:56AND APPLAUSE
17:57AND APPLAUSE
17:58AND APPLAUSE
17:59AND APPLAUSE
18:00Hello, come on!
18:01AND APPLAUSE
18:02AND APPLAUSE
18:03AND APPLAUSE
18:04I can't believe it, Francis Rossi and Tim Allen.
18:07Aww.
18:08And Bernard Cribbins from the railway tour.
18:10AND APPLAUSE
18:11AND APPLAUSE
18:12AND APPLAUSE
18:13AND APPLAUSE
18:14AND APPLAUSE
18:15AND APPLAUSE
18:16AND APPLAUSE
18:17Now, Alison has already received the best gift of all a few weeks ago
18:21when Prince Harry lip-synced to one of your exchanges from Bake Off.
18:26I thought I was dreaming when I saw that.
18:28So here's the perfectly timed clip with Stephen Colbert.
18:31If you was treated like a king for the day, what would you want me to do for you?
18:35Um, back for me, probably.
18:38You'd want me to do what?
18:39Beg!
18:40Beg?
18:41Beg!
18:42Beg!
18:43Beg?
18:44V-A-K.
18:45Beg!
18:46Beg!
18:47Oh, Beg!
18:48AND APPLAUSE
18:49AND APPLAUSE
18:50AND APPLAUSE
18:51AND APPLAUSE
18:52AND APPLAUSE
18:53AND APPLAUSE
18:54AND APPLAUSE
18:55What a weird moment!
18:56AND APPLAUSE
18:57AND APPLAUSE
18:58AND APPLAUSE
18:59I mean, it sounds like, oh, my God!
19:00Me and Prince Harry are connected now.
19:02You totally like that.
19:03You know what I mean? We're tied.
19:04Yeah.
19:05And I mean, how can I be humble now?
19:06Do you know what I mean?
19:07Does it make me kind of like royalty now? Like, am I a princess?
19:12Yeah, but it does appear that Prince Harry has got a lot of time on his hands now
19:28Harry, what are your Christmas traditions?
19:31Well, we always what we do with the TV when we have the
19:35Christmas lunch. Yeah, and then we have we've got one of those TVs that that you can bring around
19:40You know it comes you can angle it right it's on the wall, but you can angle it round
19:44Yeah
19:44And so we bring it round so that it's across the other side of the table and then we have the king's speech on there
19:50So it's like he's joining us
19:52What's that? Yeah, it has been a tough year for a lot of people
20:03And look we talked about Alex's 13-foot tree in his garden anything special in your garden this Christmas?
20:08Well, we we've got robins actually
20:11Yeah, yeah, I know we put up a nesting box last year and yeah, and we've got some actually some baby robins in there now
20:20Yeah, and I've got actually got a camera. You know one of those little tiny cameras. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah
20:25Yeah, we're like a live feed
20:29Could we see that or we have got it? Yes. Yes, we can. Yes, we can. Let's see the live feed
20:33I've been in there this morning
20:51Talk about live feed
20:57All right, we'll have more lastly for you after the break as we chat to Rick Ashley and find out which one of our guests had a crush on him as a
21:02Teenager see you in a little bit
21:23Welcome back the last leg we're joined by Alison Hammond and Harry Hill
21:28Alex is starting to change like Tim Allen in
21:32I'm not you know, I was I didn't know I don't think I don't think that's how you looked in the last part
21:38That's absolutely same mate. Okay. All right, Josh. Do you want to explain what's going on with it?
21:43I'm going through the band-aid video
21:47I think I didn't know handsome room back
21:51Handsome I
21:53Can't hear much by the way I'm staying from band-aid look at that
21:58Amazing bang on I can't hear anything
22:04I'm getting Gail Tilsley off
22:12I'm getting I'm getting Gail Tilsley and Paul Hollywood
22:15And obviously I'm now Tom Hanks as Woody from toys. Oh, yes. Oh, yeah
22:22Because the final scene of toy story is when they all become friends at Christmas
22:27Time now to welcome another guest to the last late Christmas celebration
22:30He's a soul singer whose songs may be the one thing your family doesn't fight over this Christmas. Please welcome Rick Astley
22:35Welcome to the party Rick what are your Christmas traditions um eating and drinking I think pretty much
23:06My wife is Danish and we have quite a lot of Scandinavian tradition in our Christmas bacon
23:11Yeah, a lot of bacon actually
23:14but also
23:15They celebrate on the eves on the 24th. Yes, so we've got into that habit over the years of doing that
23:21So well, I'm very sorry that you're here tonight. I know
23:26I'm straight back there after this
23:30I'll be you know lovely
23:32No, so to be honest tomorrow is a bit like our boxing day to be honest right a bit more chill and you know
23:39So yeah, yeah now we asked AI to suggest a present for you. I can't wait
23:46It said maybe a rare vinyl copy of something like the Smiths
23:50Because you did a show of Smith songs at Glastonbury and I saw it
23:53Which yet you saw it and one of our team was there and captured the joy Josh felt as he watched you perform this is genuine
24:00footage
24:02Back on the streets of Birmingham
24:04I wonder to myself
24:06I wonder to myself
24:07I wonder to myself
24:08I wonder to myself
24:09Will I barely be safe again
24:11With each side streets as he sit down
24:13I wonder to myself
24:15I wonder to myself
24:17What a nice
24:18One of the best hours of my life
24:19What a nice
24:20One of the best hours of my life
24:21What a nice one of the best hours of my life
24:23There you go
24:24And watching that video
24:25This is going to blow your mind that was after I stopped drinking
24:32Harry you share Rick's love of Morrissey's music
24:36His music yeah not so much
24:43Don't talk about that do it
24:45You performed as Morrissey
24:46I was I did Morrissey and stars in there
24:48I remember
24:49We have a dazzling clip of the enthusiastic performance from the turn of the millennium
24:55Morrissey
25:08Punctured by the car
25:10With the stars and stars
25:15Don't let you make a man of me yet
25:21When it's your new car
25:24This shine
25:27He's got nothing
25:29I don't know
25:30Oh, very good
25:32So good
25:33Have you ever met Morrissey?
25:34I haven't met Morrissey
25:35But part of it was you had to get permission
25:37So I had to get permission from Morrissey to impersonate him
25:40There was a
25:42Or to do that song
25:43And I got a fax through
25:44In the old days of faxes
25:46And it was signed by Morrissey saying good luck
25:49Morrissey
25:50Morrissey
25:51And I so I thought oh
25:52So Morrissey's on the other end of this number
25:54Oh
25:55The number is there
25:56I thought well I'll then
25:57And I had this idea
25:58So I sent him a fax back
25:59Saying how about you and me do a novelty single for Christmas
26:04Our version of Little Donkey
26:06Wow
26:07But I never
26:08Never heard back
26:09I mean you've got your own quiff
26:13I have
26:14I have to wear an artificial one
26:15But if you like
26:16I could
26:17Would you like me to reprise that
26:19Would you like
26:20Yes
26:21Have you got them
26:22I'm not feeling it
26:23What a showman
26:24He knows how to get the crowd going
26:33Here we go
26:35Here we go
26:36Here we go
26:37Oh
26:38Lovely
26:40It's uncanny
26:42Little donkey
26:45Little donkey
26:46Little donkey
26:47On a dusty road
26:50Gonna keep on
26:52Flooding onwards
26:53With your hair
26:54With your hair
26:55With your hair
26:57Oh
26:58Yeah
26:59Yeah
27:00Yeah
27:01Yeah
27:02Brilliant
27:03Oh
27:04Mercy everyone
27:06Mercy
27:08Merry Christmas
27:10So good
27:11Alison
27:12Is it true you had a teenage crush on Rick?
27:14Well it's not the sort of place I would like
27:17Probably admit it
27:18With Rick literally sitting there
27:20But he already knows
27:21We've met quite a few times
27:23And now I'm quite cool with it
27:25Like I'm alright
27:26I'm totally cool
27:27We've like been in the
27:28As long as Harry's sat between us
27:29Oh yeah exactly
27:30So Alison
27:32Just to clarify your story
27:34You used to fancy Rick Astley
27:36No it's not more
27:37Then you met him
27:38And now it's gone away
27:39Not at all Josh
27:41Obviously I've still got feelings
27:43But there is like
27:44You know
27:45Do you want to expand on that?
27:47Listen
27:48I'm not saying
27:49There's a wife
27:50There's a wife
27:51There's a wife
27:52I feel like I'm
27:54Come on
27:55Come on Harry
27:56Come on Harry
27:57Come on Harry
27:58Come over there
27:59Oh no
28:00I don't know when I'm that wanted
28:05Listen
28:10Obviously I was a lot younger
28:12Than I am now
28:13And obviously
28:14I still get the same feelings
28:16I'm going to say it
28:18There's a chance
28:19You're going to be Rick rolled
28:20Come back Harry
28:24Come back Harry
28:26Harry
28:27Alison
28:28On the very night
28:29That his wife is celebrating Christmas
28:31Harry
28:32Well she's not here is she?
28:34Listen
28:35Just out of interest Rick
28:36Where can Alison see you perform next year?
28:38Yeah
28:39Um
28:40Here there and everywhere
28:41We're on tour in April
28:42Are we?
28:43Yes
28:44We're all on tour
28:45Short notice
28:46We can't wait
28:47We can't wait
28:48We're looking forward to it
28:49And now Harry you and Alison both host different versions of Bake Off but you have brought your own showstopper to the show tonight
29:03Yeah
29:04Yeah
29:05I've got to go back there again
29:06Go on
29:07Well I just think you know people forget what Christmas is really about
29:14Yeah
29:15And what they concentrate on is the food you know it's all about the food
29:18So what I've done is I've done a my own savoury nativity
29:25Um
29:26Frazzles
29:27I love them
29:28Which I've made
29:30Which I've made myself and what
29:32So just trying to get the message of Christmas through
29:35Through
29:36Through
29:38Through food
29:39Smells lovely
29:40And
29:41Do you want me to talk you through it?
29:44Yeah
29:45So these are frazzles on the roof of the uh
29:47That's the
29:49It's a pom bear
29:50As the angel Gabriel
29:53And then we have the three kings here which I made from pepper armies because they're spicy a bit more exotic
30:02Um
30:03You've got the two sausages here Joseph and Mary obviously Joseph is a bit taller than Mary
30:09Yeah
30:10Um
30:11And then you've got the star of the show the baby Jesus
30:14Which is a pig in blanket and there's the
30:18I don't mean that in a sort of negative way you know
30:22You know
30:23You know
30:24I don't want any trouble
30:26And then
30:27You've got the manger made out of chip sticks they're nice
30:29Mm-hmm
30:30And then you've got the halo there
30:31So that's just something that perhaps people could you know make their own tradition now
30:37The savoury nativity
30:39Would you like to
30:40Have you got it in kit form?
30:41Sure
30:42Do you like you sell it in a kit?
30:43Could you?
30:44It's about 12 quid
30:45A whole lot
30:46I mean the slight problem with it is to secure the sausages you do have to use screws
30:53And we're going to have more last leg for you after the break as Alex performs a hallmark Christmas scene we've written just for tonight but right now Rick Astley is going to perform his first Christmas hit of the night
31:06Before he does though we've talked a lot about Alex's love of Christmas but Lib Dem leader Ed Davey revealed in an interview this year that he listens to Christmas tunes all year round
31:14Wow
31:16How do we feel about that? Is that all right?
31:18Oh but isn't his birthday on Christmas Day? That's the reason isn't it?
31:22I think his birthday's on Christmas Day so that's probably one of the reasons why it means a lot to him
31:27Yeah, because otherwise it'd just be fucking weird
31:29Well, he's going to make the next part of the show
31:43He's going to make the next bit awkward
31:45Rick is going to play us into the break but who better to introduce him than the leader of the Lib Dems
31:52Sir Ed Davey
31:55Hi guys, it's Ed Davey here, Merry Christmas to you all
32:00It's true I like listening to Christmas music all year round
32:04The reason is my daughter and I love winding up her mum
32:08And it's on my iPhone and we play it in the car all the time
32:12I'm never going to give up Christmas
32:14So here's Rick Astley
32:16Sleigh bells ring, are you listening? In the lane, snow is glistening
32:33A beautiful sight, we're happy tonight, walking in a winter wonderland
32:40Come on, let's go
32:42Come on, let's go
32:56Let's go
32:58Let's go
33:00Let's go
33:02Let's go
33:04Let's go
33:06Let's go
33:08Let's go
33:10Let's go
33:12Let's go
33:14Let's go
33:16Let's go
33:18Let's go
33:20Let's go
33:22Let's go
33:24Let's go
33:26Let's go
33:28Let's go
33:30Let's go
33:32Let's go
33:34Let's go
33:36Welcome back to Last Leg
33:37We're joined by Alison Hammond and Harry Hill
33:39Alex, you're definitely changing
33:41I feel a little bit more Christmassy at the moment
33:43Do you?
33:44I'm feeling it a little bit different at the moment but
33:47You're definitely progressing?
33:48No, I haven't
33:50Okay, Josh, would you like to explain who you are now?
33:54No, I'm from the band-aid video
33:56Yeah
33:57So I'm Sarah Dallin from Bananarama, of course
34:04Look at these jeans, they're fucking brilliant
34:10It ain't what I do, it's the way that I do it, we've always said it
34:13And obviously I'm Tom Hanks in the movie Forrest Gump
34:16Because he famously said life is like a box of chocolates
34:19And the main time you get chocolates is at Christmas
34:22You still look a bit like you're going to strip
34:28Yeah, Forrest Hump
34:31And now throughout the show we've been putting Alex through his paces
34:33To see how he'd fare on the US reality series Finding Mr Christmas
34:37The winner of the first series by the way
34:39Earned a leading role in a holiday movie about the owner of a Seattle dog shelter
34:44Who falls for a meticulous web page editor
34:47The movie was called Happy Howlidays
34:50See what you did there
34:52And see what they did there
34:53Love it
34:54Alright, I'm going to send everyone, if you could all go over and get ready for the next challenge for Alex please
34:58Over in that corner of the studio
35:00So Alex's final challenge tonight is to test out his acting chops in a scene we've written as the ultimate hallmark Christmas movie
35:09Lights, Camera, Christmas
35:12Help! Help! Help! I need an emergency appointment
35:22Oh my god, it's Alison Hammond, the big city TV presenter
35:26That's right, I've become so career focused I've lost touch with what's important in life
35:31I'm single and I'm home for the holidays
35:34And?
35:36And I've hit a dog
35:38Thank you
35:40Oh my god, what happened?
35:43I'll tell you what happened
35:58It's quite difficult to talk because it's really tight on the jaw
36:02At least do a dog voice
36:03I'll tell you what happened
36:04That's better
36:05Is that better?
36:06That's better
36:07I was just sitting there by the side of the road licking my own balls
36:18And she came round the corner like a lunatic and hit me
36:22Yeah, but he's such a cutie
36:24I've really fallen for him
36:26Is there anyone here who can treat him?
36:28I can't let him die
36:30I'm the presenter of for the love of dogs
36:33Of course, Miss Hammond
36:35Do you know what? The hot vet will see you now
36:37But I'm next
36:38I'm sorry, Mr. Hill, your cat's gonna have to wait
36:41It's not the cat I'm worried about
36:43It's the Robins
36:45I'm afraid Miss Hammond is next
36:55But I'm on the telly
36:56I know but not as much as Allison
36:58No one's on the telly as much as Allison
37:00No one's on the telly as much as Allison
37:02The hot vet will see you now
37:09Somebody order a dreamboat
37:11Are you the hot vet?
37:13Yes, I'm sweating buckets
37:15Do you know how hard it is to operate with these little hands?
37:18You look like a man who could really heal my heart
37:22I mean dog
37:23What kind of dog is it?
37:24I don't know
37:25One of those really little whiny ones by the looks of it
37:31I'll tell you what
37:32Why don't you come back to my charming little cottage
37:34And have Christmas with me and my children
37:36They've been missing a mother figure in their life
37:38Ever since my wife died in a tragic Christmas kite accident
37:42Oh
37:44And then we could go back to the big city
37:46And maybe you could become the resident vet on this morning
37:50Bosh
37:51There you go little fella
37:55Oh what?
37:56Get that on there boy
37:57Is that it?
37:59Stop whinging or I'll cut your bollocks off
38:01Come on princess let's go
38:04Hey what about my robins?
38:11This Christmas Alex Brooker is the hot vet in Hallmark's new movie Vet the Hall
38:21All right it's time to bring out a Christmassy mystery guest
38:36Harry and Alison have to try to work out why they were in the news this year
38:40Can we please have this week's mystery guest?
38:43Mystery guest
38:44Mystery guest
38:45Mystery guest
38:46Christmas mystery guest
38:47Oh what fun it is to have
38:50Christmas mystery guest
38:51Guest
38:53Welcome Josh Alex who is the mystery guest?
38:55This is Rob he was in the news this year for a Christmassy reason
38:59Mm-hmm
39:00But what was it?
39:01Can we have the dramatic lighting change please?
39:04So did Rob get suspended from Broadland Radio for playing All I Want For Christmas Is You on October 3rd?
39:14Did he get suspended as a school exam invigilator after playing Merry Christmas Everyone by Slade to signal the end of the final exam?
39:22Or did Rob get suspended by an undertaker after mistakenly playing last Christmas rather than the last post at a funeral?
39:31What do you think?
39:36Well I don't think you'd make a mistake at a funeral you'd be well prepared
39:40Does he look like an undertaker?
39:42That's a grave digger
39:47That's a grave digger
39:48I'll tell you what we'll reveal the mystery guest after the break
39:53Rick Astley is going to sing us into Christmas
39:55We'll see you in a little bit
39:56Welcome back to Last Leg
40:15We're joined by Alison Hammond and Harry Hill
40:18Alex has now become full Father Christmas
40:21Ho! Ho! Ho! Ho!
40:27That was a good one
40:29Do you know what?
40:30In another reality where the cards had fallen different he'd currently be doing that in a grotto in a garden centre
40:36You're not entirely sure what's going on with your costume
40:40Well I didn't think we had very long
40:42So I was the dog already so I just shoved mine on top of the dog
40:46Okay
40:47So I'm Boy George
40:48So I'm Boy George
40:59Do you know what I'm calling this outfit?
41:00What?
41:01Hair Boy George
41:02Oh lovely
41:03Lovely
41:04And clearly I'm Tom Hanks from Castaway
41:11Because when he first experiences pain due to an infected tooth that goes on to become an ongoing issue whilst he's on the island
41:17He's had a Christmas dinner
41:19Oh and I've got the volleyball as well
41:21Umm
41:23Ho! Ho! Ho! Ho! Ho! Ho! Ho!
41:27Recognise that handprint
41:28Thank you
41:31Before the break we challenged our guest to work out how this person was connected to the news
41:35Can we have the options again please?
41:36Yes this is Rob and he was connected to the news this year for Christmassy reason
41:43But what was it was it because Rob got suspended from Broadland radio for playing all I want for Christmas is you on October the 3rd?
41:51Was it because he got suspended as a school exam invigilator after playing Merry Christmas everyone by Slade to signal the end of the final exam?
41:59Or did he get suspended by an undertaker after mistakenly playing last Christmas rather than the last post at a funeral?
42:08Oh, yeah, Harry Alison
42:10Oh, could we could you say something sort of local radio ish we could see on the show?
42:19Well hi folks. Hope you're having a good Sunday
42:23Yeah
42:27Could have said no Rob
42:33Shall we go with the right now? Yes
42:35It's very we think would they suspend someone just for playing it mean isn't it if they've done that that is mean
42:41It's a cutthroat world I won't be listening to that radio station anyway
42:47Yeah, that's the last time you listen to Broadland right? Yeah, I thought you said Broadmoor
42:52I am indeed Rob Chandler breakfast presenter at Broadland radio and I was suspended for playing a Mariah Carey Christmas song early in October
43:11Oh
43:13Amazing
43:15Ooh
43:17So why did you play it and then why did they suspend you?
43:19Well, it started with a text from a listener called Becky who said she was putting out her Christmas stock in her shop and could I play a Christmas song so I thought I'll tell you what if I get at least five listener texts saying ho ho ho ho
43:33Exactly
43:37I'll consider it and we did we we got a load of text saying ho ho ho one or two saying no no no, but
43:47Then Billy the taxi driver. You must know Billy the taxi driver. No
43:54Another keen listener
43:56text and said there's a tub of chocolates in it for you if you play Mariah Carey all I want for Christmas is you so
44:06Came back after the news and I read that text out and I said quite frankly
44:11I'm disappointed Billy that you could think I could be so shallow to fall for such a blatant bribe
44:19Yeah ding ding ding ding
44:21Oh
44:23Played a song. Yeah
44:25How long was you suspended for? How long was you suspended for?
44:27One day. Oh is that all?
44:29Yeah
44:31Did you go shopping? What did you do? Yeah, well just stayed in bed all day
44:34Chill day
44:36Can we please have a round of applause for Rob?
44:38All right
44:44All right, we are about to win the show for the Christmas sing-along from Rick Astley
44:47But before we do would you please thank our guests Alison Hammond
44:50We'll be back next week for our New Year's Eve special with an incredible line-up musician Peter Doherty
45:05Comedians Maisie, Adam and Phil Wang
45:07National treasure Sir Lenny Henry
45:09TV personality Danny Dyer
45:11Rugby star Hannah Botterman
45:13Lioness Lucy Bronze
45:14As well as a celebrity barman who is 100% faithful
45:19Right now though Rick Astley is going to sing us into Christmas
45:22Thanks for watching your last leg
45:23My name's Adam Hills
45:24Merry Christmas to all
45:25And to all a good night
45:27You better watch out
45:37You better not cry
45:39You better not pout
45:40I'm telling you why
45:42Santa Claus is coming
45:45To town
45:47It's snowing, Rob! Let's go!
45:49So
45:53It's snowing
45:54Yeah
46:04He sees you when you're sleeping
46:05And he doesn't turn you on
46:07Do things I say
46:09Do things I say
46:10Well I know
46:12There's nothing
46:13I должно
46:14Tom
46:16He sees you when you're sleeping
46:18He knows when you're awake
46:21He knows if you've been bad or good
46:25So be good for goodness sake
46:28You better watch out
46:30You better not cry
46:32You better not cry
46:34I'm telling you why
46:35Santa Claus is coming to town
46:40He got eight billion toys on his sleigh
46:45He's packed, he's coming your way
46:49Santa, it's coming in town
46:56Ba-ba-da-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba
46:59Bang! Merry Christmas!
47:00Yeah!
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