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00:00Hi
00:05Hello, these days I spend more and more time in
00:10my Wiltshire home and the pub I own, thinking about all
00:15the big problems in the world and some smaller ones that annoy me.
00:20Luckily there's a place I can go to solve them all.
00:25Or at least try my shed.
00:31It's here that I have the tools.
00:33Let's just saw some wood up.
00:35T and a couple of other highly competent blokes.
00:41Very good. Brace yourselves.
00:43Who've agreed to help me rid the world of...
00:45Problems.
00:46Is she getting the ticket out?
00:47Great.
00:48Dirty flight at us.
00:49And small.
00:51The cereal has gone soggy.
00:53I'll also have to take on other people.
00:55Problems.
00:56What is wrong with Peter?
00:57He used to make a sound and now he doesn't.
01:00By which I mean the locals at my pub who are always bringing
01:03me stuff to mend.
01:05Is it a train set?
01:08So join us and our experience.
01:10A sightable crew.
01:11Who will capture our endeavours.
01:15That was epic.
01:16As we create...
01:19Make...
01:20That feels like a terrible thing you've just done.
01:22Repair.
01:23So it's never worked.
01:24Not in my life.
01:25a lifetime.
01:26And repurpose...
01:27Ahh!
01:28Aaaaaaah!
01:30In my shed load of ideas.
01:33What do you think?
01:34This is just...
01:35It's brilliant.
01:40Ah...
01:45A typical British countryside pub.
01:48My pub.
01:50American visitors love the sleeping dog.
01:55The 18th century charm.
01:57And the partly thatched roof.
01:59But don't be fooled.
02:01This is not a historical institution.
02:04It is a hotbed...
02:05Of ideas and innovation.
02:11I've always wanted a pet zebra.
02:13Because we were going to put some donkeys...
02:15Right from the trusty copper.
02:17They could go in the barn.
02:18And then you could have dinner with the donkey.
02:20If you wanted.
02:21Hey.
02:22Yeah.
02:23Andrew.
02:24We don't have...
02:25Donkeys for dinner.
02:26Fantastic.
02:27Thank you very much indeed.
02:30But today's hot topic is...
02:32Nevertheless...
02:33Food.
02:34Cut.
02:35Establish yourself.
02:36Yeah.
02:37Yeah.
02:38Let's do it.
02:39Action.
02:40This is a bowl of delicious macaroni cheese.
02:42But it's actually from the children's venue.
02:44But I really...
02:45I really like it.
02:46And I say delicious.
02:47It was when I had my first forkful.
02:49Then...
02:50When the film crew reset.
02:51And they wanted to bring their lights in.
02:52And they wanted to give me some advice on what to say.
02:54And all the rest...
02:55And now...
02:56It's got to that point...
02:57Where it's just become slightly...
03:00Tepid.
03:01And the cheese has just started to congeal a little bit.
03:05And I know a lot of people get annoyed about this.
03:08Because you see people slightly bolting...
03:10In their food.
03:11Because they're thinking...
03:12Mmm...
03:13This is nice.
03:14But it's going to get too cold.
03:15If I don't eat...
03:15It quickly.
03:16And what's the...
03:17I mean...
03:18You've come to the pub.
03:19You're supposed to be able to relax.
03:20So...
03:20So all we're going to do...
03:21Is provide a heater...
03:22For the plate or bowl.
03:25I'm not talking about trying to recook the food.
03:27Just keep it at the correct temperature...
03:29For eating...
03:30Which is the temperature that it is at...
03:32When it comes out of the kitchen.
03:33So you don't need...
03:35To rush.
03:36And it will change the world.
03:38Like everything else we do.
03:40To be honest...
03:43It doesn't really matter...
03:44To be honest...
03:45It doesn't really matter...
03:45If your beer...
03:46Warms up a bit.
03:47But food going cold...
03:50Causes a panic.
03:52So...
03:53We're going to make a table...
03:55To keep hot food...
03:56Hot.
03:57It's a radical idea...
03:58But there might be something...
04:00In it.
04:01And not just for pubs either.
04:02Maybe for you too...
04:03At home.
04:05But first...
04:06We must establish...
04:07The ideal hotness...
04:08For hot food.
04:10I've cooked us.
04:12The word cook...
04:13Is doing the heavy lifting.
04:14I've cooked us.
04:15The word cook is doing the heavy lifting.
04:15A delicious bowl...
04:16Of beans and sausages.
04:19So...
04:20They've just come out of the pan.
04:21As we know...
04:22A bean boiled...
04:23Is a bean spoiled.
04:24So they were...
04:25It's simmering.
04:26Oh it's...
04:27It's 70 degrees.
04:30Sorry I've come for sausages.
04:34I'd say that was just...
04:35Very slightly on the hot side.
04:36Let's leave it...
04:37And see what it's like...
04:38At say...
04:3960 degrees.
04:4060 degrees.
04:4180 degrees.
04:4260 degrees.
04:4360 degrees.
04:4460 degrees.
04:4528 degrees, we might have to cut away to something else.
04:5067.1.
04:55We haven't actually explained what we're making.
04:59No, exactly.
05:00What we're really building is a very elaborate, personally controllable hostess trolley.
05:05The hostess trolley was very popular in the 1980s, wasn't it?
05:08Yeah.
05:08The disadvantage of the hostess trolley...
05:10...being that it was too big to simply put in that cupboard under the sink.
05:15For our design, we want to install personal hot plates into a dining table.
05:20All that is, is an aluminium plate with a heating element.
05:24So all we need to do...
05:25...is put 24 volts into this, which we've got our little power supply.
05:29And that will go up to...
05:30...about 110 degrees.
05:31Wow.
05:32That is hot.
05:33Each hot plate is connected to a...
05:35...console, which is used to detect the current temperature of the plate.
05:39Stick that.
05:40Stick that in your beans.
05:40Right, so this is the temperature probe for the hot plate.
05:44And...
05:45...and control the target temperature.
05:47So you can set this now to whatever temperature you want.
05:50So it's a thermostat, effectively.
05:52It is basically a thermostat.
05:55Beans and sausages, one of the meals that made Britain...
06:00...grate at, let's call it 50 degrees.
06:05Oh, it's too cold.
06:10Mmm, definitely too cold.
06:12So, with 70 degrees too hot and 50 degrees...
06:15...too cold, let's see if our prototype hot plate will warm up our beans too.
06:20As Goldilocks might say, just right.
06:22So I think the optimum temperature for a...
06:25...bowl of beans and sausages, for me, is about 65, 66.
06:29So...
06:30So we're now trying to reheat the beans, but they've only got to about...
06:33That's 40 degrees under there at the minute.
06:35We know why that is.
06:36We do.
06:38Because this is a...
06:40...great insulator.
06:41What we really need to transfer heat from hot plate into food...
06:45...is something that's a good conductor.
06:47Well, I wonder if we have such a thing.
06:49Let me go and have a look.
06:50Well, actually, any old metal thing would do, wouldn't it, for the purposes of demonstration.
06:54Yes.
06:55That's amazing.
06:55There's this thing right here.
06:57Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.
07:00Wowsers.
07:05Oh, it's going up already.
07:09There you go.
07:10There you go.
07:26There you go.
07:15So, the beans and sausages, Simi, are now at 60.
07:20Yeah.
07:21We can now eat them again, but the important thing is that we...
07:25We could sit here and pontificate all day, and the beans and sausages would remain at the same...
07:30...temperature.
07:31So true.
07:36This is happiness.
07:37This is what it looks like.
07:39Some people think that...
07:40...that they want a luxury yacht or the unqualified love of all women, but you don't.
07:45You want beans and sausages out of a cake tin on a ceramic hot plate.
07:50But there's no time for bean bliss when you've got a...
07:55...prototype to build, which requires a table.
08:00And a Tony.
08:01That's it.
08:05So let's go, go, go, go.
08:08Right, you join us in phase two...
08:10...of our plate heating table, which doesn't actually have a proper name yet.
08:14It will probably end up being called...
08:15...the plate heating table.
08:16I've been working on this idea in my head.
08:20...for well over a year, and I've been trying to promote it.
08:22And say, wouldn't it be great if you had a table that heated...
08:24...and everybody goes...
08:25...or whatever?
08:26I'm thinking, no.
08:27It makes sense.
08:28You do want it.
08:30It's something that's been bothering people ever since food was invented, which was probably...
08:35...the Egyptians or someone.
08:40First, we need to work out the optimum placement for our hot plate.
08:44Does that look good?
08:45Yeah.
08:46.
08:47.
08:48.
08:49.
08:50So we need that corner marking.
08:53.
08:54.
08:55.
08:56.
08:57.
08:58.
08:59.
09:00.
09:01.
09:02.
09:03.
09:04.
09:05.
09:06.
09:07.
09:08.
09:09.
09:10.
09:11.
09:12.
09:13.
09:14.
09:15.
09:16.
09:17.
09:18.
09:19.
09:20.
09:21.
09:26.
09:27.
09:28.
09:29.
09:30.
09:31.
09:32.
09:32looks like we'll need to start again. Let's just pretend that hasn't happened.
09:37I won't see that. It's a prototype.
09:39It is a prototype.
09:42It's a prototype.
09:47It's a prototype.
09:52It's a prototype.
09:54It's a prototype.
09:58It's a prototype.
10:00It's a prototype.
10:02We're going to drill a hole and then James is going to chisel a square.
10:07We'll receive this and let us place on one.
10:11It's a prototype.
10:13It's a prototype.
10:15It's definitely gone through.
10:17Here's the wooden mallet.
10:19This recess I'm chiseling is where the connection...
10:24The connection port under the hot plate will sit so the whole thing can lie flat.
10:28This, by the way, viewers, if you're not a regular in my pub, is not one of the regular...
10:33tables.
10:34This is a piece of tat that we got from a junk shop.
10:39That is the most awful thing I've ever worked in my life.
10:43It's like chiseling Weetabix.
10:46Other breakfast cereals are available.
10:48Look at that.
10:53Neat.
10:54So where would you like your control?
10:56I...
10:57My instinct is to do them left.
10:58Yeah.
10:59Next, we need to install our temperature control panel.
11:03We do have to do this quite carefully.
11:05I've marked it out very accurately, but we've got to stick to the line.
11:08Because you've only got a lip of about one and a half mil.
11:11Yep.
11:13That's a job for you, Tony.
11:14He's a multi-tool.
11:15Here he is.
11:16Come on.
11:17What multi-tool is this?
11:18Quite a noisy one, actually.
11:20You've been warned.
11:23And now...
11:24put up the...
11:26There's no disc in stores.
11:29Floating up.
11:31In this case, we can see of the
11:28What do you think?
11:33That is bloody miles off, Tony.
11:36It's meant to be miles off.
11:38You can chisel in, because you said it's got a slight angle on it.
11:43But hang on, that's not even a right angle.
11:45There you go.
11:47That's...
11:48That's like 95 degrees.
11:53Time to use a precision tool.
11:56He's called Sim.
11:58Now you've got in there, what's the table made of?
12:01It's a chipboard.
12:02In case we...
12:03It's not said how horrible this table is.
12:05It is horrible stuff, isn't it?
12:06Yeah, it's horrible.
12:08Well, gentlemen, that's been horrible to watch.
12:13All right, try that.
12:17That.
12:18There you go.
12:19It's quality.
12:21Oh, no, I wouldn't say quality.
12:23All we need to do now is wire the...
12:28The hot plate up to the controller and the power source.
12:32And...
12:33Robert's your mother's brother.
12:35We need to do exactly the same on the other side.
12:37A mirror image...
12:38A mirror image of this, i.e. a slightly cockeyed heating plate and a totally wonky digital...
12:43Digital control, but on that side...
12:44Genius.
12:47This...
12:48Is something I've actually wanted all my life, subconsciously.
12:52I've always thought, what?
12:53Hot food goes on hot plates.
12:55I always heat the plates at home, but it doesn't stay hot.
12:58But now it does.
12:59That's all it is.
13:01It's one of those simple and very elegant...
13:03solutions to a problem that's been going on for a very long time.
13:06And then the food stays hot.
13:08And then you can relax.
13:13It's brilliant.
13:14It is.
13:15It is good.
13:16It also looks...
13:18Terrible.
13:22But the big question...
13:23The question is, will it work?
13:28Along with the soon-to-be consistently warm meals...
13:33The locally sourced ales and the shiniest petanques at this side of Le Mans.
13:38Oh, that's rubbish.
13:42Another draw for...
13:43the pub, apparently, is the fact that I'm not too shabby at mending things.
13:48Oh, God.
13:48Hello.
13:49Enter Rebecca with...
13:51I wasn't expecting that.
13:53A record player.
13:55I bought it because my partner wants to get his record...
13:58collection up again.
13:59So we bought this.
14:00It's got a graphic equaliser.
14:03Tape to tape?
14:05Yes.
14:06God, I remember doing tape to tape.
14:08What young people don't realise with their downloads and what have you.
14:13is that back in the 80s and the 90s, if you were going to have, say, a party...
14:18You had to have the party by yourself first while you recorded all the music in real time.
14:23And then you would also make tapes for people you fancied.
14:26Did you ever do that?
14:27Of course.
14:28Do you remember trying to blank out the bit off the radio in the concert?
14:31Yes.
14:31DJ speaking.
14:33So anyway, what doesn't work about it?
14:37The turntable.
14:38Because I'm taking it apart two or three times to try and fix it.
14:43Is it not spinning or...?
14:44When this goes down, this little thing here...
14:48It's supposed to attach here.
14:51Right.
14:53And it tells you whether it's got a 7-inch or a 12-inch record, but...
14:58I don't know what position it's supposed to be in, and it stops the arm moving.
15:02It should...
15:03Should the arm come out automatically?
15:05Yes.
15:05From the buttons here, it does, but it sort of gets...
15:08Stuck.
15:08So it depends what size record you put on.
15:11Nothing's snapped off.
15:12So that...
15:13On this, that one, the spring's gone.
15:15Yeah, so when you've got a 7-inch, that one...
15:18One's down, and when you have the 12-inch, it's down.
15:20And has it ever worked?
15:22It did work once.
15:23And then it's stopped.
15:25So when you put a record on, if it's a 7-inch...
15:28That one goes down, so it knows, and then...
15:31But this is the bit...
15:31This is the problem.
15:32Oh, no, you've only...
15:33So far, I can't diagnose the problem, and nor contain...
15:38Tony, we're going to need a third opinion.
15:40Is Simi here?
15:41I'm here.
15:42You're there?
15:43Simi, have a look at this.
15:45Right, turntable.
15:46Yep, it plays records.
15:47Yeah.
15:48Or it did, for reluctance to do it, but if I press start...
15:51Yeah.
15:52So queuing...
15:53The pattern is up, but the platter would go round in that direction...
15:58What's on the inside of that, then?
16:01It's the 7-inch in the...
16:0312-inch arms.
16:04Suddenly, one thing becomes abundantly clear.
16:07I mean, we're going to...
16:08We're going to have to take this to the workshop, because three of the most intelligent men on
16:11television are...
16:13Unable to fix it in the moment.
16:16Are you filled with confidence that we can make...
16:18This work again for you, and...
16:20I hope three heads can work out...
16:23One turntable.
16:24You'd hope so.
16:25So, can we turn back time on Rebecca?
16:28Rebecca's record player and get it working again?
16:30I'll leave you with it.
16:31Or will we just go round...
16:33Round and round in circles.
16:38Well, after some more fiddling in the pub, Simi hasn't managed to crack it either.
16:43So, it's off to the workshop for Tony and me to give it a whirl.
16:48The thing is, record players are not in our wheelhouse.
16:52Luckily...
16:53As it turns out, my friend Colin...
16:58Has exactly the same unit.
17:01And I said, do you mind if I borrow that?
17:02I want...
17:03I want to play a record.
17:05So, he's lent it to me.
17:06So, we could take Collins apart.
17:08And compare...
17:09Could we take Collins and just stick it on there?
17:13Uh...
17:14Uh...
17:18No, we should try and mend it.
17:23Apart from anything else, we will learn by mending it.
17:25We will learn some of the mysteries...
17:28Of simple machines.
17:30Levers, springs, inclined planes.
17:33And wedges and all those things.
17:34That were known in antiquity.
17:36Um...
17:37Unfortunately...
17:38They're not known to us.
17:39In the true spirit of the community pub-based mending program...
17:43We refuse to be beaten.
17:45Hopefully, Collins' functioning record player...
17:48Will serve as a blueprint.
17:49Shall we test it first?
17:50I'll go and get a record.
17:51There's a record next door.
17:53I think.
17:56Wow, look.
17:57It's a record for...
17:58From the Music for Pleasure series...
18:00Which I remember from childhood.
18:02Who put this...
18:03Side one.
18:07The Moscow...
18:08The Moscow Radio Symphony Orchestra.
18:10So...
18:11That goes on there.
18:13How does it know?
18:15How does it know?
18:18Oh, you've got no speakers.
18:21Oh, yeah.
18:23How does it know?
18:24How does it know?
18:25How does it know?
18:26How does it know?
18:27How does it know?
18:28How does it know?
18:29How does it know?
18:30How does it know?
18:31How does it know?
18:32How does it know?
18:33How does it know?
18:34How does it know?
18:35How does it know?
18:36How does it know?
18:37How does it know?
18:38How does it know?
18:39How does it know?
18:40How does it know?
18:41How does it know?
18:42How does it know?
18:43How does it know?
18:44How does it know?
18:45How does it know?
18:46How does it know?
18:47How does it know?
18:48How does it know?
18:49How does it know?
18:50How does it know?
18:51How does it know?
18:52How does it know?
18:28You forget, don't you, because everything's just one unit now.
18:33Hey Siri, play Chopin with the Moscow Symphony Orchestra.
18:38We're not concerned with the sound, so let's say I'm sick of Chopin. Stop.
18:43Do you move it back, man? I don't know.
18:45No. It knows.
18:48So, despite being speakerless, Colin's turntable works.
18:53Rebecca's, however, doesn't. But why?
18:58So, it moves freely. There's nothing wrong with that.
19:00Yeah.
19:01But it's the activity...
19:03Yeah. It's something in that section under there.
19:08That moves the arm freely.
19:10But when we trigger something else down here...
19:13It lifts, but doesn't then click into this.
19:15So, there's something missing that's linked...
19:18Those two together.
19:19But how can anything have fallen out of it?
19:22It's been...
19:23It's been sealed up since it was made.
19:25What this calls for, as we like to say in the shed world, is...
19:28a bit of guessing.
19:31Well, it's...
19:32It's...
19:33It seems fiendishly complicated for something that just has to...
19:37go...
19:38Mm-mm.
19:39Or...
19:40Mm-mm.
19:41That's all it does.
19:42It's overly...
19:43It's not often we are completely stumped.
19:46Let's put it that way.
19:48But it appears we are...
19:50completely stumped.
19:53no...
19:54Have a good statistically.
19:55Well, I'm really happy.
19:56I Julie sees you with him in Logan.
19:57Here you see that Republic in the digi...
19:58Remember the sort of room?
19:59Wast you close to me?
20:00We will dance more easily.
20:02We'll hide sincerely at you first.
20:03We've lost�ats, because we had ...
20:05A lot of has become part of the igni...
20:06...wouldn't этих bears...
20:07... Alright, a lot of it...
20:09Is it letter to girdleEs?
20:11My wife will be Может.
20:12Ha, ha, ha!
20:15My wife.
20:16The doctor will be sure to tread...
20:17I could force the air in the trash...
20:18He said, hi.
20:19Because we endorph terminate with milk,
20:20And it's really a heart whoason,
20:21i guess...
20:22Really, I could do it.
19:58You
20:03Here in the shed Tony and I are attempting to mend Rebecca's
20:08Broken record player
20:11So that presses
20:13On that lever which pushes
20:15That wire and then the
20:17Next thing it does happens
20:18Underneath that plate
20:20But look that little move then
20:21Yeah the damp thing
20:23But for some reason that's not lifting the arm
20:26So that lever is connected to that arm
20:28You can just see through that slot
20:32And then that
20:33Which is the damped bit
20:35Which must relate to the raising of the arm
20:37Because it goes up and down
20:38Very nicely
20:39At any point have you turned
20:41Any of these adjusting screws?
20:43Err no
20:44But you can see
20:47See it
20:48So it's possible
20:51As usual
20:52When all hope
20:53Seems lost
20:54I reach for my little screwdriver
20:55With the swivelly end
20:58Oh
20:59There
21:00Oh
21:01If it's a simpler
21:02If it's a simpler
21:03As long as that
21:04I'm going to be really annoyed
21:05That bit works
21:07There is
21:08In essence
21:09A height adjusting screw
21:10In there
21:11Erm
21:12And there is
21:13There is
21:13There is
21:14A little cam
21:15That lifts the tone up
21:16And you can adjust
21:17The position of it
21:18With it
21:19With a tiny little screw
21:20That you access
21:21Through that hole
21:22And I
21:23I turned the screw
21:24And it
21:25Worked
21:26We can lift
21:27And lower
21:28The tone up
21:29Should we put some power to it
21:32Because maybe
21:33In the act of lifting it
21:35That triggers
21:36The bit
21:37That moves the arm
21:38The tone up
21:39On to the record
21:40So you're saying
21:41We took all this apart
21:42And all we needed to do
21:43Was put a screwdriver down there
21:44Hmm
21:45Time to see
21:46If the tone up
21:47Will now
21:48Cue automatically
21:49Now I'm
21:50Gonna
21:51Yes
21:52Ha ha
21:53Ha ha
21:54Ha ha ha
21:55Ha ha ha
21:56Let's see if it will stop
21:58And then
22:00Wherever that
22:01Switch goes
22:02Does that
22:03Excellent
22:04We've accidentally
22:05Mended it
22:06The thing we didn't think about
22:07Because we were being a bit thick
22:08Is
22:09Because it has a mechanical brain
22:11It knew
22:12In the
22:13Pub that there was no record
22:14On there
22:15It's very clever
22:16Because it knows
22:17Not to put the stylus
22:18Onto the rubber
22:18Mountain room in it
22:19Yeah
22:20There is a lesson for us all here
22:21Tony
22:22And those watching
22:23Which is
22:24Not to panic
22:25About these repairs
22:26People do this with their cars
22:27And their bicycles
22:28As well
22:29You still start thinking
22:30I better take it all to bits
22:31And see what's wrong with it
22:32In actual fact
22:33The obvious
22:33The obvious solution
22:34Is often the right one
22:35And it was in fact
22:36Putting a screw
22:38Driver in there
22:39And turning it about
22:40Two times
22:41It's almost as if
22:42There's a little army
22:43Standing there
22:44With
22:43Flags
22:44Saying
22:45It's here
22:46You
22:47Halfwit
22:48By some miracle of tinkering
22:52We've
22:53Inadvertently
22:54Fixed
22:55To the broken
22:56Record
22:57Player
22:58We should probably
22:59Return to the pub
23:00And give it back to Rebecca
23:01Before we inadvertently
23:02Break it
23:03The game
23:06That was fiendishly complicated
23:08Given that all it does
23:09Is spin a record
23:10And put a stylus on it
23:11Yes
23:12Is all
23:13All these little cams
23:14And slots
23:15And pins
23:16And springs
23:17And there's a long arm
23:18Fallen off
23:19A metal rod
23:20That pushes the toenail back
23:22And
23:23And then we discovered
23:24That there was an adjusting screw
23:25Here
23:27Yep
23:28Which had a lot to do with it
23:29And your stylus was broken
23:30So we bought you a new one
23:31Oh
23:32Thank you very much
23:33That's okay
23:34I'll buy a couple of pints
23:35I need a couple of pints after this thing
23:38Yeah
23:39Tony really hates it
23:40He's traumatised by it
23:41Well it nearly became a frisbee in my house
23:43Would you like to try it?
23:47Yes please
23:48Okay
23:49So you're in charge of the buttons
23:50Okay
23:51I will put this
23:52Okay
23:53I will put this
23:53Don't look at the record
23:54Because it's top secret
23:55This is actually
23:56Effectively
23:57A 12 inch
23:58Single
23:59This is a 45 RPM
24:0012 incher
24:01This is a 45 RPM
24:0212 incher
24:03So if you'd like to
24:04Well you know how this goes
24:05Press power
24:06Yes
24:07And then you should simply be able to
24:08Good
24:09No
24:10No
24:11No
24:12No
24:13No
24:14No
24:15No
24:16No
24:18No
24:19No
24:20No
24:21No
24:22No
24:23Just press start
24:24Ah
24:25No
24:26No
24:28No
24:29No
24:31No
24:32No
24:33No
24:36No
24:37No
24:38is a miracle as well. That's completely analog. It's just a little wobbly groove in the thing.
24:43All this lovely music comes out. Amazing how these things are put together.
24:48It's haunted my dreams. It's haunted me for a while as well. I'm so pleased you've had
24:53it.
24:54It's haunted.
24:59Brilliant.
25:00This wasn't actually for you, was it?
25:02No, it's actually my part.
25:03Is he going to be pleased with that, or is he going to go, oh, right?
25:05No, it'll be fantastic. Our neighbours might not be very happy.
25:08This evening, though.
25:09Well, if you play that, it won't. It's awful. Excellent. Well, if you wouldn't...
25:13mind taking it away.
25:14Yes.
25:15We'd never want to see it again.
25:16Thank you so much.
25:17It's been a pleasure.
25:18Sort of.
25:19Sort of.
25:23Over in my shed, we're not all about solving physical problems.
25:28Some of our biggest issues are rooted in society.
25:33Right, here is a problem to which I'm sure you will all relate.
25:38This is the door through to the kitchen from the workshop, and it is spring loaded.
25:43Which is why we have this big weight here.
25:45Take that away.
25:46The door shuts.
25:48Now, if you're approaching that door, and someone is behind you...
25:53There must be a distance at which you don't need to bother holding the door open anymore.
25:58But...
25:58What is it?
25:59Nobody really knows.
26:00So you tend to get to the door and you go,
26:01Oh no, there's somebody...
26:02I'd better hold the...
26:03The door and then 500 people go through and you stand there for the rest of the day.
26:07It's a genuine...
26:08One problem, I think.
26:09And it's one that's never been solved.
26:11Would you agree?
26:13It's not just me, is it?
26:14I've wasted half my life opening doors for people.
26:17And what's infuri-
26:18And what's infuriating is most don't say thank you.
26:20No.
26:21Though they often don't even notice that...
26:23You've done it.
26:24They...
26:25They sort of assumed that that was your role in life.
26:28Anyway, we think we've come up with the answer.
26:30And we're going to call it the door opening zone.
26:33The door open zone of politeness.
26:34Or...
26:35The door open zone.
26:36The door open zone.
26:37The door open zone.
26:38Tony, if you wouldn't mind standing there, right on the threshold...
26:42And I'm going to...
26:43I'm going to count you down.
26:44And let the door go.
26:45And you walk.
26:46But when you hear the door shut, stop.
26:48Okay.
26:48Mark that point.
26:49Okay.
26:50In three, two, one, go.
26:53To establish our DOZOP, we first need to calculate the average distance...
26:58Beyond which, you no longer need to hold the door open.
27:02Okay, that's...
27:03Tony.
27:04Let's try it with you, Sim.
27:05Don't think about where Tony got to, just where you...
27:08Would get to.
27:09I'm not in a rush.
27:10No, you're not in a rush.
27:13Right, that's Simi.
27:16You will have to do exactly this for your...
27:18Your door, because not all doors close at the same speed.
27:21Follow our instructions, but do it for your...
27:23Your door.
27:24Go.
27:25To work out the average, we need a sample...
27:28A sample size of at least four more door opens.
27:31Go.
27:33Oh, that's enormous!
27:38Tony's always got a tape measure.
27:41Now, we need to calculate...
27:43The average distance by finding the midpoint between the shortest...
27:47And the longest.
27:48142...
27:50So 71.
27:51Okay, there it is.
27:53Here is the beginning of the zone of politeness.
27:58By our calculations, the door opening zone of politeness covers the entire...
28:03Distance between this chalk line and the door.
28:07This sat...
28:08Satisfies everybody.
28:09The door opener, the approaching person, Etika, the future...
28:13The picture of the British as a people.
28:18Time to put the Dozob to the test.
28:21Tony, you start...
28:23Start somewhere.
28:24Don't tell me where you are.
28:25Yeah.
28:26Are you ready?
28:27I am.
28:28Three, two, one...
28:28I am approaching the door and I open it.
28:30Is anybody coming?
28:31He's in the zone of politeness.
28:33Thank you, good sir.
28:34My pleasure.
28:35Okay.
28:36That was quite successful.
28:37Let's try it with...
28:38Let's try it with someone else.
28:39Into...
28:43To the bank.
28:44Nope.
28:49You were right at the door when it shut?
28:51Yeah.
28:52Did it feel rude?
28:53No.
28:54But you knew you weren't in the zone of politeness?
28:55Yeah.
28:56So you can't be offended?
28:57No.
28:58Excellent.
28:59So far the Dozob is working well.
29:03Go on, Will.
29:04I will see.
29:05I really wanted you to see.
29:06Yes, Will.
29:07You can have a...
29:08Time to go.
29:09Ah, time to go to the bank.
29:12But after the helpful...
29:13intervention of our executive producer...
29:19What was that meant to be?
29:20Was that a bit annoying for you?
29:22Potentially.
29:23Potentially because I've...
29:24You know, my inner thought is...
29:25Well, I've bothered to hold the door open for this bloke,
29:27and now he's door...
29:28I'm looking at his feet.
29:29Yeah.
29:30The Dozob descends into debates about morality.
29:33We haven't got anywhere near people in wheelchairs,
29:36or, you know, walking with stairs.
29:38or in mobility scooters, or with heavy shopping, or a baby.
29:42Civility.
29:43I would let go of the door before you get there, because...
29:46If I'm holding the door...
29:48Or you, being impolite, might just carry on, then I've still got the door.
29:52And chivalry.
29:53Allow me.
29:55Allow me.
29:56Ha ha ha ha ha!
29:58Ha ha ha ha ha!
30:00That was brilliant!
30:02Ha ha ha ha!
30:03I've never seen it move that quick!
30:05And the possible inadvertent meltdown...
30:08of the very society it was designed to improve.
30:11I'm just being honest...
30:13I'll admit, I cannot help it instinctively.
30:15I feel different about holding the door open for a woman.
30:18than the way I feel about holding it open for a man.
30:20I do hold them open for men, of course.
30:22But it's...
30:23It's just different.
30:24It's more complicated than we thought.
30:28Nevertheless, we push on, with one final test to see if the dose of...
30:33what will enable the Curtis transference of door holding among the whole team.
30:38If you'd all like to follow me now, everybody who's not holding a camera...
30:43Off we all go.
30:48Oh, thank you.
30:50At some point, surely someone will...
30:53relieve me of my door opening duty.
30:55Pleasure.
30:58Thanks.
30:59Which they do not.
31:02Some...
31:03Some of us are just doomed to failure, I'm afraid.
31:08Did the proof not only do you do it?
31:09Conor to failure...
31:10I believed that...
31:11I believed when something is impossible...
31:29It's all a bit too hot for chopping veg.
31:32If only someone on the production...
31:34...the production team could solve keeping cool with cutting cucumber.
31:37Are you ready to try this?
31:39Are you ready, Sim?
31:40I've been ready.
31:41We've been ready all our lives.
31:43Born ready.
31:44Action.
31:46It is a very hot day here in the...
31:49...workshop, but it's okay because we have a fan.
31:52A fan, of course, does...
31:54...only one thing.
31:55It blows air around along with disease and flatulence.
31:59Somebody on the crew, we won't say who it was...
32:01...but his name begins with E and ends in Thendoors.
32:04...said, could you use a fan to chop a salad?
32:07Well, it's an interesting idea because it makes this...
32:09...a dual-purpose machine.
32:10It can keep you cool whilst preparing your lunch.
32:14Now, we shouldn't have to tell you...
32:16...don't try this at home, but please...
32:18...don't try...
32:19...let's begin with...
32:21...is this a lettuce?
32:22That's it.
32:23Yeah.
32:24Would you mind, since you're on the right side, Tony, feeding that in?
32:29Yeah.
32:30Yeah.
32:31Yeah.
32:32Yeah.
32:33Yeah.
32:34Yeah.
32:34I can't let this truce on me face.
32:37It's not about turning in there.
32:38Oh, I'm...
32:39I'm quite surprised at that.
32:40Don't get the chopstick in there.
32:41It's not stupid.
32:42Well...
32:45Oh, you see?
32:46You did it.
32:47I'm not stupid, he says.
32:48No.
32:50So, that's a lettuce and chopstick salad.
32:52That's a...
32:53Good job.
32:54I want your finger.
32:54It's probably time for the second of many health and safety announcements.
32:59Don't be like Tony.
33:00If you're trying this at home, you shouldn't, but if you...
33:04You are, don't shove the chopstick through.
33:07Nor any other bits of your...
33:09That personage.
33:10Our lawyers, thank you for listening.
33:12I mean, we maybe need to work on the...
33:14...flexion mechanism a bit.
33:16Stop the fan for a moment.
33:17So, if we trimmed...
33:19...the guard at the back, but also folded it in so that it made a delivery...
33:24Oh, yes.
33:25Before you do anything else...
33:27I've got time to live in.
33:28I've got time to live in.
33:29I've got time to live in.
33:30I've got time to live in.
33:31Off at the wall.
33:34Once again, viewers, I shall remind you...
33:36...not to snip through the back of the safety guard on your own fan at home.
33:40We've got to make...
33:41Ensure that the...
33:42And our delivery chute doesn't foul the blades.
33:46Otherwise, the whole thing could disintegrate and then the fan will hit your...
33:52Nor, in fact, should you take off the front guard.
33:54This...
33:55This front removes, for example...
33:56...exactly this reason, so that you can remove salad.
33:58We've already got the first bit.
34:01Beauty.
34:02Right, there's your feeding slot.
34:04Back on goes the...
34:06Safety cover.
34:07You good?
34:08That's close enough for government work.
34:09Okay, I'm going to plug...
34:11...and send the fan back in.
34:13Wait, wait, wait, wait.
34:14Apparently, we haven't mentioned...
34:16...health and safety quite enough.
34:17I'm not having him leaning round the back...
34:19...to put a carrot over his hands...
34:20...over the blades.
34:21You can go here...
34:22...like this.
34:23Right.
34:24Yeah, that's fine.
34:25And feed it through.
34:26Okay?
34:27Great.
34:28So just like that.
34:26...on the side.
34:29Right, I'm going to plug the fan back in.
34:31Tony, you are icy vegetable feed.
34:34Shall we start with spring onion?
34:36Yeah.
34:37Nice, healthy spring onion.
34:38There you go.
34:39If you're worried about witnessing cruelty...
34:41...to vegetables...
34:42...you might want to look away...
34:45...now.
34:46...pasta.
34:47I'm depending on you.
34:48You bit half a summer.
34:49yar.
34:50...
34:56Here in our sweltering shed, we're trying to cool ourselves down with...
35:01...the nice refreshing salad made by chopping vegetables in a...
35:06...fan.
35:08Which is something you should not try at home.
35:11Ha, ha, ha!
35:16That smells nice.
35:19If we follow the three-second rule, we can eat...
35:21...the spring onion off the floor.
35:22OK, let's try the cucumber next.
35:24And I hold the bowl.
35:26In roughly the right position.
35:28Slowly.
35:29Oh, look at that!
35:30Nice!
35:31Nice!
35:32You can hear the face.
35:35Stop!
35:36That worked a lot better than I thought it would.
35:38Look at that!
35:39That's perfect.
35:40I would say cucumber...
35:41...is definitely a success.
35:46Next...
35:46...the carrot.
35:47...the good.
35:48...the chips.
35:49...the nuts.
35:50...the nuts.
35:51Get the nuts.
35:52So I'm going...
35:53...so I found a kid.
35:55And it'll be a little bit more.
35:56But I'm going to find the nuts.
35:57Let's play their nuts.
35:58Before we go on the floor...
35:59...the nuts.
36:00that's great so results so far there is
36:05quite a bit of salad on the floor but it's actually worth
36:10working better than I thought it would and now this is going to get messy
36:15how to tell the difference between knowledge and wisdom
36:19I'm going full speed
36:20plus bowl
36:22knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit
36:24action
36:25wisdom is knowing not to put it in a fruit salad or a
36:30fan
36:31oh no
36:35I'm going full speed
36:36I'm going full speed
36:37I'm going full speed
36:38I'm going full speed
36:39Thank you
36:40I think you sort of sliced it a bit things that are said on this show that are not
36:45said in any other walk of life right let's just pause whilst we get the tomato out of the fat
36:50well the thing is whilst this is going on we are becoming very hot so at the moment this
36:55single-purpose fan has no purpose I've got sweat running into my eyeball
37:00yeah hurry up so we can tear the fan
37:05tomato is free it's an almost sliced tomato time for
37:10a few final veg if we want to feed the entire crew
37:15have we achieved solid success
37:20there you are what we are calling the work
37:25chopped salad do you mind anointing that with a bit of balsamic
37:29Sydney and then we
37:30can tuck in I mean if you went round to someone's house
37:35and brought that out you'd just think that was some salad
37:38cucumber
37:40mmm I don't know why I'm expecting it to taste any different
37:45taste exactly the same
37:47taste like salad
37:48taste like salad
37:49taste like salad
37:50It's very hot in here.
37:53I've also got bits of tomato juice.
37:55In my eye, moving seamlessly on from food that keeps us cool to...
38:00...keeping piping hot food hot.
38:02Time to see if my clever plans...
38:05...that solves the age-old problem of lukewarm lunches has worked.
38:10Introducing an ingenious table, designed to keep your plate at the perfect...
38:15...temperature, which we've inventively called the Royal Oak Table.
38:20...of plate temperature maintenance, which is a shabby-looking thing, but it's only a...
38:25...prototype.
38:26Here are the controls.
38:27That is the current temperature of the plate.
38:30Here it's at 35 degrees.
38:32You can set the target temperature, that's the one in blue.
38:35The great thing about this is when the food comes out and is placed on here...
38:40...we will see what temperature the plate is at because it will register on the red actual...
38:45...temperature and then we can set the target temperature.
38:47Presumably we are happy with the temperature of the plate.
38:50...to the same value and it will maintain it and we can spend all afternoon...
38:55...eating our lunch and, to be honest, probably will.
39:00Oh, Chris.
39:02Chris.
39:03Oh, look at that!
39:05That's what the doctor ordered.
39:06It's ham, egg and chips on a tin plate from 1940.
39:10Thank you, Chris.
39:11That is brilliant.
39:12So I'm going to set my...
39:15...plate to 55.
39:16And that means...
39:20...we can talk of absurdities, relax...
39:25...eat slowly, which I like doing.
39:28Um, ow, I put my finger on the hot plate...
39:30...thinking it was the plate.
39:31That is a potential issue, but you only do it once.
39:35...then you know not to be such a half-wit.
39:37I think we need some red sauce.
39:39I think...
39:40...so, too.
39:41Chris.
39:42I think so, too.
39:43Chris.
39:45It's taking a while for the red sauce and the sauce...
39:50...pot to arrive.
39:51And normally I'd panic a bit, but it doesn't matter.
39:55My plate is at 57 degrees.
40:00What's your plate at, Sam?
40:01Well, it's at 55.1.
40:02It's absolutely brilliant.
40:03This is not a discussion we know.
40:05...that we normally have when we have lunch, is it?
40:06No!
40:07Oh, Chris.
40:08God.
40:10Red sauce.
40:11Yes, please.
40:12About time.
40:13The food could have gone cold.
40:15Quite a lot of things have happened.
40:18We've had to wait for the tomato ketchup...
40:20...and the salt.
40:21Now Simi can't get the top off a simple pepper grinder.
40:26We've already been here for over 12 minutes.
40:28I've eaten one chip.
40:31A little bit of egg.
40:32I'm about to have my first slice of ham.
40:35Just imagine those interruptions you get.
40:37Like, someone goes to the bog.
40:39And imagine if there's a group of...
40:40six feet.
40:41There's always going to be somebody who's delaying everything.
40:44I've put...
40:45too much on my fork and it's not going to fit in my face.
40:47I can just tell.
40:48Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.
40:50As well as being a slow eater, I've got a very small gob.
40:55Hmm, hmm, hmm.
40:56Hmm, hmm, hmm, hmm.
40:57But...
41:00How is the true temperature of my ham, egg and chips holding up?
41:04Could that be interesting?
41:05I've got a heat thermometer in the van and I'd quite like to get it.
41:10So I can just have a picture of what we're looking at.
41:14Here you go.
41:14So I'll...
41:15I'm going to get it.
41:15Don't let your food go cold.
41:17Well, no, I won't.
41:20I'm going to get it.
41:25Now I've seen the back of Simi's van.
41:27It's not going to be a 30-second job to find that.
41:30What he calls a heat thermometer.
41:33I could be up to...
41:35I could be up to 10 minutes before he's back.
41:37And normally I'd hate him.
41:38Because I'd feel I couldn't eat my egg and chips, but I'd also know that they were going...
41:43I've been cold.
41:46But they're not there.
41:48There's...
41:48Stable, this is stable egg and chips.
41:53Thanks to the combination of a temperature adjustable
41:58hot plate and a conductive tin dinner plate.
42:02The rush to wolf down...
42:03Rapidly cooling grub is a thing of the past.
42:07This saves all...
42:08All sorts of things, weddings, families, marriages.
42:13It's my desire not to stamp on Simi's head
42:16because he's gone off to look for a tool in the van.
42:18And here he is.
42:22Oh, you did actually find it.
42:24I did find it, yes.
42:26I'm going to just have a quick look at your...
42:28Dinner.
42:29You are at 59 degrees.
42:33Spot.
42:33It's on 55 to 60 was what we decided was good for most foods.
42:38They're all like pub tableau.
42:43Plate temperature maintenance is an absolute triumph
42:47because this chip came from the kids.
42:48It's in the kitchen, piping hot, perfect temperature,
42:50about 60, 65 degrees, and it still is.
42:53And...
42:53Actually, half an hour has gone by now in real time.
42:58Well, this chip is so great.
43:01Top chip.
43:03Now we can enjoy our ham, egg, and chips for the next...
43:08Talk amongst yourselves.
43:13Oh, it's bot on.
43:16It's just not going to get cold.
43:17It's like a thermos flask where you don't...
43:18have to bother taking the lid off.
43:23It's like a coffee.
43:25We'll talk a little bit more about it.
43:26So, let's eat one, ice cream, um...
43:28and we'll walk out at a gas!
43:28We'll wake up here and get on top of it.
43:29And we'll talk about fitness.
43:30We'll talk to your customers secure the changeoff.
43:32We'll tell Diaz noticed many different phones.
43:34We'll talk to their customers to...
43:35And finally, take some questions to Gray.
43:37Now, it's a Cape Cat looks radiest.
43:37Oh!
43:40Certainly, we'll talk about cách so as far as being with Maurice.
43:41Holy smokes!
43:42And we'll be the best out of this life.
43:45And things I'll remind everybody,
43:47uh can maybe let me see him.
43:48Well, here I'll read along with Munich back.
43:50Yes, so thanks cause you.
43:51We'll beuciones to have more Settings that there have big
43:52You
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