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From bizarre twists to nonsensical storylines, these films left us scratching our heads! Join us as we count down our picks for the most absurd movie plots ever conceived. Our list includes bizarre adaptations, confusing thrillers, and questionable sequels that somehow made it to theaters. Did your favorite cinematic disaster make the cut?
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00:00Welcome to WatchMojo and today we're counting down art picks for the most universally awful
00:12storylines to ever make it to the big screen.
00:20Despite his aggressively generic title, this Cameron Diaz-led thriller actually had some
00:40interesting ideas. Unfortunately, they're buried beneath a series of twists that range
00:45from preposterous to outright laughable. The premise is a simple moral dilemma. If
00:50they press the button on the box, they will win a million bucks, but a stranger will die.
00:54If you think that's ridiculous, wait till the second half of the box, where the film
00:58loses all semblance of reality. We're talking about portals, morality experiments, and yet
01:02another button press. This one sacrifices Cameron Diaz for the good of her son, ending this absurd
01:07wannabe thriller on a truly head-scratching note.
01:10Listen, we don't want anyone to get hurt.
01:14Well, if you didn't want anyone to get hurt, you shouldn't have pushed the button.
01:18Number 19. Madam Web
01:20By 2024, superhero origin stories were completely played out. So, we have to wonder what Sony
01:35was thinking when they decided to make Madam Web a prequel to an original story. You heard
01:40that right. The movie sees Dakota Johnson save a trio of teenage girls who are destined to become
01:44web-based superheroes. The issue is that, outside of a few flash-forwards, we don't actually see
01:50any of them as the heroes they're meant to be. Madam Web fails to deliver the bare minimum
01:54of what people wanted from a superhero movie. At least it gave us some good memes.
01:57You are the only one who can change the future. And when you take on the responsibility, great
02:06power will come.
02:08Number 18. The Master of Disguise
02:10Are you a member of the Turtle Club?
02:12Well, not exactly.
02:13Not exactly. But am I not turtly enough for the Turtle Club?
02:18While Dana Carvey has an unparalleled knack for impressions, the story and jokes around him
02:23fail to amount to anything resembling entertainment. There is a compelling idea in someone embracing the
02:27family lineage to save their parents from their past. But when said past is becoming the so-called
02:32Master of Disguise, the whole thing comes off as a bad joke that's been stretched way too far.
02:38That's really the best way to describe this turn of events. A bad, unfunny, ill-conceived joke.
02:42You can put on all the funky hats and goofy masks you want. There's just no hiding how bad the
02:47Master of Disguise is.
02:48Your father was once the world's greatest Master of Disguise.
02:52But my papa just runs a restaurant.
02:54This is what you are doing.
02:56This is what I want you to do.
02:58Number 17. Catwoman
02:59What can I do for you?
03:01White Russian. No ice? Hold the vodka? Hold the Kahloa.
03:06For the record, a movie centered on Batman's feline femme fatale could be amazing. But sadly,
03:12that's not the movie we got. In fact, we didn't even get that version of Catwoman. Instead of
03:17borrowing from decades of acclaimed comic book history, this malign 2004 film took Catwoman's
03:22alter ego and crafted an original story that belongs in the litter box. Gone is Selina Cow,
03:27thief extraordinaire. In her place is Patient Phillips, a wrong employee who's resurrected by an
03:32Egyptian deity to take down her former company. In between mils of catnip, of course. It's silly,
03:36boring, and a complete disservice to the Catwoman people know and love.
03:40I came over. Guess what? It's overtime.
03:48Number 16. Santa Claus Conquers the Martians
03:51You will never return to Earth. Now you belong to Mars. Ho, ho, ho.
04:01When some alien children discover the joy of Christmas through Earth TV, their parents only
04:06have one option. Kidnap Santa for themselves. We aren't kidding. Somehow delivering on the
04:11bizarre promise of its title, Santa Claus Conquers the Martians starts with the Yuletide
04:15abduction and doesn't let off the gas from there. At one point, a dissenting alien tries to kill
04:20Santa, and when that fails, they try to sabotage his makeshift toy factory. If you can believe it,
04:25it's so much weirder in execution, and not even in a so bad it's good way. Suffice it to say,
04:30this absurdist comedy is the equivalent of coal under the tree.
04:33But we've no time to lose. We must go into action. Now, we cannot eliminate Santa Claus,
04:38but we can discredit him. Become a laughingstock throughout Mars.
04:42Number 15. Troll 2
04:44Do you see this writing? Do you know what it means?
04:52Hospitality. And you can't piss on hospitality. I won't allow it!
04:58Never mind the bad acting. Never mind the low-budget effects. Heck, never mind the fact that this was
05:04a completely separate film added to the troll franchise afterwards. The real issue is, at a
05:09fundamental level, this story is simply unbelievable. The goblins, because they aren't even trolls,
05:14by the way, don't just eat their victims. First, they turn them into ridiculous living plants. A
05:19creative decision so baffling, it makes you wonder what was going on during shooting. We can tell you,
05:24chaos. The script was allegedly given out day by day, which makes you wonder if they had any
05:29direction in the first place. Altogether, our reaction is a lot like this.
05:32Oh my god!
05:36Number 14. Super Mario Bros.
05:39Name. Mario.
05:41Last name. Mario.
05:42Okay, what's your name?
05:44Luigi. Luigi, Luigi?
05:48No, Luigi Mario.
05:49Calling this one a loose adaptation would be putting it nicely. After all, it's freaking Mario.
05:55How do you mess it up so badly? The answer is simple. Remove everything people love about the
06:00franchise and ship it to theaters without a care in the world. The colorful Mushroom Kingdom is a
06:05dystopian parallel world, Princess Peach is replaced with Daisy for some reason, and Bowser is reduced to a
06:11mindless monster. Oh, and don't even get us started on what they did to poor Toad. But,
06:16the worst part is this isn't just a bad Mario Bros. movie. It's a bad movie period. It's a me?
06:23No, it's a not.
06:24Mario!
06:25What?
06:26Take my belt.
06:28Trust the fungus.
06:29Number 13. The Last Airbender.
06:31My name is Ong, and I'm the Avatar.
06:36I ran away, but I'm back now.
06:41How do you butcher a beloved animated series? The first step is making it live action, and the second
06:47is cramming 20 episodes of world building and character growth into a frantic hour and a half.
06:52The resulting film, and we use that word tenuously, feels more like a feature length montage than a
06:58true adaptation of Avatar. We hope you like voiceover, because that's how 90% of the plot unfolds. The scenes
07:04we do get are rushed, hollow, and stitched into a narrative that's fraying right before our eyes.
07:09Aang and the others deserve much, much better.
07:12My people are dying, Ahsoka. Those who are in charge of others have a responsibility.
07:17It's time we show the Fire Nation that we believe in our beliefs as much as they believe in theirs.
07:21Number 12. Freddy Got Fingered.
07:23Freddy, would you like some sausage? Freddy, would you like some sausages?
07:27Freddy, would you like some sausage? Sausages! Sausages!
07:31We don't like being too mean, but seriously, did this movie have a script? At times,
07:36it feels like Freddy Got Fingered is being made up as it goes along, and that's not a good thing.
07:41We start with a young man trying to earn a career in animation, then switch to him proving his worth
07:46to his dad and somehow end up with international kidnapping. Yeah, we don't get it either. Along the
07:51way, there's a load of pointless scenes and an elopement with Shaquille O'Neal. We have no idea
07:56what Freddy Got Fingered was trying to be and quite frankly, we don't think the movie knows either.
08:00I'm the backwards man, the backwards man, the backwards man, the backwards man. I can walk
08:05backwards fast as you can. Number 11. Howard the Duck.
08:08No one laughs at a master of quack food. Is this supposed to be a superhero film or is it an off-kilter
08:15romance? Maybe a farce comedy or a martial arts demonstration? Those are all genuine questions
08:20because we spent all of Howard the Duck trying to figure out what the heck was going on. The movie
08:25swaps between genres and tones at such an electric pace, you're probably leaving the theater with
08:29whiplash. For example, one minute Howard is getting a job at a spa and the next he's saving his love
08:35interest from a villain quite literally named the Dark Overlord of the Universe. Outside of some
08:39ruffled feathers, this movie is a mess. Number 10. Saving Christmas. Beautiful green trees
08:52decorated with fruit, shimmering with lights, inside a house. That's God's idea, not the Druids.
09:01No matter how you feel about Kirk Cameron's religious beliefs, you have to admit this movie
09:05isn't exactly winning any Oscars. No, for that it would need an actual plot. What then is he saving
09:11from Christmas you may ask? The question is materialistic atheists. To make his point, Cameron
09:16spends an overwhelming majority of the 80-minute runtime preaching about the origins of the holiday.
09:21As a result, Saving Christmas plays more like a boring history lesson than an actual movie. That's
09:26probably why it scored a rare 0% on Rotten Tomatoes and is considered one of the worst films
09:32ever made. Nicodemus brings all the funeral preparations, frankincense, myrrh, aloe, and cloth.
09:40And why is he bringing the cloth? To wrap the body of our crucified Savior, Jesus.
09:46Number 9. The Happening.
09:48My name is Elliot Moore.
09:52I'm just going to talk in a very positive manner, giving off good vibes.
09:58We're just here to use the bathroom, and then we're just gonna leave.
10:03I hope that's okay.
10:03M. Night Shyamalan has a career of dizzying heights and devastating lows. The Happening is
10:09unfortunately on the bottom end of his work. You'd think a global epidemic of violence would be
10:14handled with an appropriate degree of urgency. Instead, the characters limp along through boring
10:18locales until we hit the twist. The virus isn't a bioweapon. It's a neurotoxin released by plants to
10:24defend against human industrialization. That's right. The big bad villain of this ambitious sci-fi
10:29thriller is a flower field. Until it isn't, because at the end, the outbreak just sort of stops.
10:35Don't ask us how or why. We're packing hot dogs for the road.
10:39You know, hot dogs get a bad rap. They got a cool shape. They got protein. You like hot dogs, right?
10:46Number 8. Soul Man.
10:48Gordo, it's gonna be great. These are the 80s, man. It's the Cosby decade. America loves black people.
10:55The 80s were a very different time, both culturally and in Hollywood. But even viewed
11:00through a contemporary lens, there's no excuse for a movie with such a strong focus on blackface.
11:05Mark Watson is a law student who, in a bout of utter insanity, decides to pose as a black man to
11:11earn a scholarship. Yeah, offensive doesn't even begin to cover it. We wish we could say the movie
11:16admonishes Mark's actions, but the racial issues are watered down in favor for lowbrow humor.
11:21Because of that, Soul Man drew protest upon its release and is now only remembered for being
11:26one of the most ill-conceived movies ever made. But you've learned something that I can't teach them.
11:32You've learned what it feels like to be black.
11:34Number 7. Super Babies. Baby Geniuses 2.
11:37Who the heck are you? Your worst nightmare. A small fry with a big attitude.
11:44Oh, strap in, because this movie has to be seen to be believed.
11:49We open on the story of Kahuna, a superpower kid who saves a group of orphans from Jon Voight in
11:54a bad German accent. Then we fast forward to a new generation of so-called super babies,
11:59who are tasked with stopping the same villain from brainwashing the world through television.
12:03How do they beat him? By getting super powers, of course. Kahuna's there too,
12:06and plot twist, Jon Voight is his non-power older brother who decided world domination was a
12:11constructive outlet for his childhood trauma. It's absolutely unhinged and stinks as much as an
12:17actual dirty diaper.
12:20I'll feed you. I'll take care of you. I'll even change your diaper.
12:24I'm warning you, Crow. I'm Bill Biscayne, and if you touch my diapers, you're fired.
12:29Number 6. Remember Me.
12:30It must be nice living at the bookstore by yourself with all your stacks of books and all that. But
12:35see, I actually plan on having a career, and a wife, and a girlfriend, and I don't know, a divorce,
12:40and a midlife stalking episode, and erectile dysfunction.
12:43For the first hour and a half of this movie, it's a passable decent, if by the numbers, romantic
12:48drama. Tyler and Ali endure a lot of needless suffering before finally confessing their feelings,
12:52and we roll credits. Nah, instead, the movie continues for another 15 minutes,
12:57showing Tyler enter his office at the World Trade Center. And the date? September 11th, 2001.
13:02All at once, Remember Me went from an average drama into an exploitative misfire. It flushes all of its
13:08story down the drain in favor of a twist ending that offends more than it inspires. Clearly,
13:12this movie never heard of the phrase, less is more.
13:15Make her call you daddy. I don't know. Just steal her panties and sell them on eBay,
13:20or post them on our high school's homepage. I don't know. Just be creative.
13:23Number 5. I Know Who Killed Me.
13:25Hey. Hi. Where'd you find a blue rose?
13:30I passed the place on the street. Confusing, messy, utterly implausible. You could say it all about
13:35this movie, which throws so many wild plot twists at you, it's genuinely difficult to figure out
13:40what's even happening. You have Lindsay Lohan playing twins, except maybe not, and one is kidnapped
13:46and the other may be a hallucination? It's like whoever wrote the script decided that rather than
13:50filling plot holes, they throw more twists at you and hope you forget about all the massive gaps in
13:55logic. We didn't. But at the very least, we solved the mystery of what killed Lindsay Lohan's acting
14:00career. And the answer is this movie right here. It's okay, it's me. I know who killed me.
14:06You're alive, Takuna, okay? You're not? No, look.
14:09Number 4. Plan 9 from Outer Space.
14:12Greetings, my friend. We are all interested in the future,
14:16for that is where you and I are going to spend the rest of our lives. And remember, my friend,
14:22future events such as these will affect you in the future. Aliens resurrected the dead to stop
14:28humanity from destroying the universe. That's literally the movie, and yes, it's as off the
14:33walls as it seems. The aliens think a zombie apocalypse will make the government listen,
14:37and if not, there won't be an Earth left to worry about anyways. It's an outrageous leap of logic
14:42that feels like it only exists to shoehorn both zombies and aliens into the same film. But hey,
14:47at least it's creative. Plan 9 doesn't come to any kind of conclusion about humans meddling with
14:52weapons beyond their means. Instead, it's content to skip along, indulge a few tropes, and live as one of the
14:57weirdest movies of all time.
14:59The air gas is as good as mine, Larry. The one thing's sure, Inspector Clay's dead, murdered,
15:07and somebody's responsible.
15:09Number 3. Jaws the Revenge.
15:11Come on, you overgrown goldfish, come to Uncle Jake.
15:14Hell hath no fury like a shark scorn. That's right, if you thought teens were petty, wait till you meet
15:21the star of this movie. Apparently, this great white remembers Ellen Brody and wants revenge on her
15:26family. Forget the fact it's a shark and that this is following up two of the most iconic blockbusters
15:32of all time. In actuality, Jaws the Revenge sounds like a parody of the original films,
15:36and its laughable execution doesn't help matters either. The whole movie is just utter nonsense
15:41from start to finish, and if you have any reverence for the series, you're best staying out of the
15:45water for this one.
15:46I've always wanted to make love to an angry welder. I've dreamed of nothing else since I was a small
15:52boy.
15:52Number 2. Highlander 2. The Quickening.
15:54Ashes to ashes, dust to dust. If you don't take it out and use it, it's going to rust.
16:02Some films don't need a sequel, and by some films, we mean Highlander. Money talks though,
16:06and so we got the Quickening, which is certainly a movie, legally at least, in reality. Highlander 2 is
16:12a disjointed dumpster fire masquerading as a film. There is so little scene-to-scene continuity,
16:17watching it makes you think they forgot to shoot half the movie, but they didn't. The thing is just
16:22that poorly edited. You go from fantastical flashbacks to sci-fi revolutions to the de-aging
16:27of Christopher Lambert in such rapid succession, there's no time to digest any of it, let alone
16:32fine enjoyment. There's a reason Highlander 3 pretends this movie didn't happen.
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16:55Number 1. The Room.
16:58There's an internal question at the center of this film. Is it an international farce,
17:08or a horribly misguided attempt at filmmaking? Either way, the fact of the matter is nothing
17:13makes a lick of sense anyways. Plot threads are introduced and promptly discarded with a single
17:17scene. Character motivations are basically non-existent, though, admittedly, that might be
17:22the acting. Then there's the dialogue itself, which lives on for all the wrong reasons. We really
17:27struggle to even call The Room a story, but hey, it's certainly memorable, and that's more than a
17:32lot of other movies can say. What's the worst movie you've ever sat through? Commiserate with
17:52us in the comments below, and don't forget to like and subscribe for more WatchMojo videos.
17:57And here's the full, if you'd like to share this video.
18:02I'm going to say that.
18:04Hello.
18:06Bye.
18:08Bye.
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18:12Bye.
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18:14Bye.
18:15Bye.
18:18Bye.
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