Its Your Move - Season 1 Episode 18 Goodbye Farewell and Amen
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Short filmTranscript
00:00Let's do it
01:00Good evening.
01:20Tonight, we bring you the story of Julie Burton, a cheerleader, but strangely enough, a cheerleader without cheer.
01:28For a perverse crime is about to strike Julie down, a crime from the hands of one she trusted.
01:36The day begins ordinarily enough within the Burton residence.
01:40Mom, I can't find my panties.
01:45My special cheerleading panties.
01:47Did you look in the hamper?
01:49I've looked everywhere, Mom.
01:50They're gone.
01:50Triads are this afternoon.
01:52Maybe you could wear your gym shorts under your skirt.
01:55Mom, Miss Gulch is a maniac about looks.
01:57She'll notice if I'm not wearing them.
01:59If I'm gonna be Captain or even make the squad, I've gotta look perfect.
02:03Okay, okay.
02:04I'll look in the laundry basket.
02:05They're bound to show up somewhere.
02:08That's probably them right now.
02:13Hiya.
02:13Ready to go?
02:14No, not yet.
02:15Hey, did you read that thing in the newspaper this morning?
02:18This guy's motorcycle, it crashed into the side of a car, and then the bowling ball flew off the back, and then it knocked somebody's head off.
02:26Angela, I can't find my panties.
02:28Julie, no.
02:31Well, it must have been your brother.
02:33Well, that was my first thought, too, but it's not him.
02:35He doesn't do anything bad anymore.
02:38Mom caught him, and he's on probation.
02:39Really?
02:40Boy, I'd like to see that.
02:41Well...
02:46Oh, Matthew!
02:51Come here, boy!
02:55Come say hello to Angela, and be nice, or I'll tell Mom you've been bad.
03:00Hello, Angela.
03:02He's been defanged.
03:05This is the little brother that I always wanted of.
03:09Broken, beaten husk of a being.
03:11Look, you can even do this.
03:14Ow!
03:19Julie, I can't find them anywhere.
03:21You're gonna have to wear your gym shorts.
03:22I'm sure Miss Gulch will understand.
03:25Our old cheerleading sponsor would have, but not Miss Gulch.
03:28Be on time and look perfect.
03:29That's all she cares about.
03:31I'm sure Miss Gulch isn't perfect.
03:33Yes, she is.
03:35And she's really pretty, too.
03:36For a gym teacher.
03:38Morning, everybody.
03:39Good morning, Norman.
03:40Here you go, sweetie.
03:43Norman, you look so nice.
03:44Oh, thank you.
03:46You don't usually dress this nicely just for school.
03:49Well, I feel if I'm a teacher, I should set a good example for the kids.
03:52Uh-huh.
03:52I hear there's a new teacher, a Miss Gulch.
03:55Yeah, I think I've met her.
03:56Listen, Eileen, I hate to ask you this, but since you had the day off today, would you do me a favor and drop this jacket at the cleaners for me?
04:02Of course.
04:02Oh, thanks.
04:04Got to go.
04:04Don't want to be late.
04:05Okay, bye-bye.
04:05Bye, Mom.
04:06Bye, honey.
04:06Have a good day.
04:07Bye, Miss Burton.
04:07You got to do too.
04:08Bye-bye.
04:09Oh, Julie, good luck today.
04:11I don't need luck.
04:12I need my panties.
04:13Oh, let's go.
04:25Yes.
04:25Oh, let's go.
04:25Ready?
04:26Uh-huh.
04:26Ready?
04:27Okay.
04:28E-C-I-B-E-N-T-C-O-R-I.
04:33Okay, candidates.
04:35Cheerleading tryouts are in ten minutes.
04:37Nobody's late.
04:393-10, tryout for cheerleader.
04:413-11, you can tryout for the band.
04:46Angela, your socks are uneven again.
04:50One of my knees is higher than the other.
04:54Fix it.
04:55Yes, Miss Gulch.
04:57Mr. Ellis.
05:00What is it, Miss Gulch?
05:01Your tie's crooked.
05:03And there's lint on your shoulder.
05:06Is that all?
05:07Not even close, but I really don't have time for this now.
05:10I have to insist that Mr. Lamb help me clean the gym equipment.
05:13I sent him a note about it.
05:14Hi.
05:15Hey, listen.
05:16I just heard a great one.
05:17Knock, knock.
05:18Your soccer team's using my equipment, and it's filthy.
05:21The volleyballs are a disgrace, and the badminton birdies desperately need soaking.
05:24We'll be cleaning them after school.
05:26Wear something casual.
05:28You're supposed to say who's there.
05:31Watch out for her, Norman.
05:32I think she likes you.
05:34Hey, come on, Julie.
05:35We can't be late.
05:36I can't believe it.
05:37First, I lose my panties, and now my pom-poms are gone.
05:39Your pom-poms, too?
05:41Yeah, it's like someone's out to get me.
05:43Hey, don't worry, Julie.
05:44You'll make the squad.
05:45You're the best.
05:46Hey, you'll be captain, and I'll be co-captain, just like every single year since eighth grade.
05:50No, here.
05:51Take my pom-poms, Julie.
05:52I mean, cut.
05:53It's the least I can do for you after you taught me the shoes and helped me with my beauty tips.
05:58No, I couldn't, Frida.
06:00Wait a minute.
06:01Aren't there some spare pom-poms up in the equipment room?
06:04Yeah, I think so.
06:05That's right.
06:05Yeah, yeah, because my boyfriend hedgehog.
06:08Well, I mean, your boyfriend hedgehog.
06:11My ex.
06:12Anyway, he took me in there once, and I think that I saw some pom-poms up near the ceiling.
06:19That's great.
06:20Oh, that's great.
06:21You guys go on.
06:22I'm going to go get him, okay?
06:23Okay.
06:24So, I hope we all make the squad.
06:26Yeah!
06:26Anyway, Julie, you better hurry up, because if you're late, you're not a cheerleader.
06:35And if you're not a cheerleader, you might as well be ugly.
06:38Or smart.
06:39Maybe somebody is out to get me.
06:50Nah, that's silly.
06:51I'm going to go get me.
07:21Oh, no!
07:30Somebody help me!
07:33I'm locked in this cage!
07:35Help me!
07:37Somebody?
07:40Is anybody around?
07:43Help me!
07:45Most curious.
07:48Someone or something has trapped our Julie in an untenable position.
07:54And speaking of being trapped in an untenable position,
07:58it's time for a commercial.
08:17Thanks for telling Mom I pulled your hair and next time there won't be any witnesses.
08:40Matthew, aren't you going to ask me what's wrong?
08:51Can't you see how desperate I am?
08:54Hey.
08:56What is it?
09:00I'm no longer a cheerleader.
09:01I'm nothing.
09:19I'm nobody.
09:21Why am I living?
09:22Why am I living?
09:27Well, say something.
09:28Jesus, how could that have happened?
09:35Golly, White, you're one of the best cheerleaders at school.
09:39All right, just stop it.
09:41Stop what?
09:42Come on, this is the new me.
09:44The little brother you always wanted.
09:45I don't want the new you.
09:47I want the old you.
09:49I want the old you to figure out some scheme to get me back on.
09:53Something dirty and low.
09:56Something slimy that rakes in the sewer.
09:58Something only you could do.
10:02Why, I'd be happy to sign a letter of protest.
10:05A letter?
10:07The Pope could write a letter.
10:08I need someone to get something done.
10:11How good are you if you're not going to scheme?
10:15Wait a minute.
10:15Are you saying that I could only be effective when being a criminal?
10:20That I couldn't get anything done just as a normal human being?
10:24You believe this, Eli?
10:30Well, you're wrong.
10:32I can help you.
10:33And I won't have to break my probation and do it.
10:35I'll just use my sense of justice, skill, and native wit.
10:38What are we looking for?
10:49Clues.
10:50Maybe something in Angela's locker will help us.
10:55Someone's coming.
11:01Hello, Connie.
11:02Oh, hi, Matt.
11:04Hey, listen, congratulations on making Captain.
11:05You really deserved it.
11:06Well, I thought so.
11:11I love it when you girls wave your pom-poms around.
11:13It's much more interesting than actually being able to see the game.
11:17Cheerleading fascinates me.
11:19For instance, how do you girls tell your pom-poms apart?
11:23Um, do you mean how do we know we haven't accidentally taken another girl's pom-poms?
11:28Look, I take my name on mine so I couldn't possibly have taken Julie's.
11:32I know you didn't.
11:34I mean, it's just, I'm not so sure about Angela, you know?
11:37You know, you're right there.
11:39I wouldn't trust that sneaky gossip.
11:41I mean, no one does.
11:43In fact, one time I saw her, she was a-
11:45So I just watched that Connie.
11:47You know, you can tell her friends by the daggers in their backs.
11:50Thanks a lot, Angela.
11:57Eli.
11:58You know, these girls are more complex than I thought.
12:00Who would ever look at those blank, vacant faces and realize there's actually a mind at work?
12:06Huh?
12:06Never mind, what'd you find in Frito's locker?
12:13Oh, curling iron, hairbrush, hairspray, hair rollers, bobby pins, and the U.S. Army Guide to Explosives and Demolitions.
12:21Well, that's odd.
12:25What would she be doing with hair rollers?
12:30Yeah.
12:34Ammonia.
12:35Well, we'll just take these.
12:37Eli, we're getting real close.
12:38We'll take a look at the scene of the crime, the equipment room.
12:40Then after that, we'll gather all our suspects together and lay this little brain buster to bed.
12:44Wow, this is exciting.
12:47I feel just like that great detective heart to heart.
12:57So, does anybody know why we're here?
12:59Uh, do you mean here in this room or here on this planet?
13:05Hey, Lamb.
13:06Dwight.
13:07Did, uh, Matt call you, too?
13:09Nah, my wife brought home Bolero, and I took the first bus anywhere.
13:14Okay, they're all here.
13:19We can get started now.
13:20Your attention, please.
13:25Now, we're all here today to unmask a murderer.
13:32Murderer?
13:33What?
13:34A murderer of a young girl's hopes and dreams.
13:39Now, you all had a motive to keep my sister off the cheerleading squad.
13:46Some more than others.
13:48Some badly enough to stop at nothing.
13:51Someone like you.
13:54Now, that is ridiculous.
13:56She's my best friend.
13:57Until she took your boyfriend.
13:59Yeah, but I don't care.
14:00I'm over him.
14:02Over him?
14:03Uh.
14:06Why, that's a rather interesting comment from someone who wrote on her notebook
14:10427 times Mrs. Angela Hedgehog.
14:15All right.
14:19All right.
14:20So I do still love him.
14:22And Julie stole him from me.
14:23So, yes, I took her panties.
14:24I wanted to hurt her.
14:26But I didn't push you into the equipment room.
14:33No, that's right.
14:34You hated her.
14:36But you wouldn't really benefit if she was off the squad.
14:38Unlike you.
14:42I didn't take her boyfriend.
14:44I don't even like tattoos.
14:47But she wanted to be captain bad.
14:50Bad enough to do just about anything.
14:52But she tipped her hand when she bought her captain bars one week before tryouts.
14:58Oh.
14:59Well, all right.
15:00I hated her.
15:02Miss Always Captain.
15:04Miss Top of the Pyramid.
15:05I've had her bony knees in my back ever since 8th grade.
15:09So, yes, I chucked your stupid pom-poms.
15:12I tied weights to the end of them and I threw them off the pier.
15:16So now your pom-poms sleep with the fishes.
15:19Ha!
15:22But I didn't throw you in the equipment room.
15:25I didn't.
15:26Oh, I know you didn't.
15:27You see, that would have taken real hatred.
15:30That would have taken you.
15:33But Julie and I are friends.
15:35She even did my hair for tryouts.
15:37She was grooming me for the squad.
15:39Oh, she was grooming you, all right.
15:43Grooming you for disaster.
15:45All right.
15:47All right, it's true.
15:48I hate her.
15:49She put the perm rods in and then she went to watch Love Connection.
15:54When she came back, it was too late.
15:57I look like Elmer Fudd.
15:59Well, I wish I thought of pushing her in, but I didn't.
16:08Oh, I know you didn't.
16:09You didn't even have enough brains to take out your own perm rods.
16:15Yeah, but then who did it?
16:18Well, there are a lot of obvious suspects.
16:20But the person who isn't obvious is you, Principal Ellis.
16:24Say what?
16:32Really?
16:33Isn't this how it happened?
16:35You're walking down the hall as usual.
16:38The day was done.
16:39The bell had rung.
16:40It was time to relax.
16:41Well, it's ten minutes after three.
16:46I think I'll push a white girl in the closet.
17:01That is the dumbest thing I have ever heard.
17:06Sorry, Eli.
17:07Damn, I was so sure.
17:09Now, we've eliminated Angela, Connie, Fudd, and Mr. Ellis for the time being.
17:21But the person we can't eliminate is you, Norman.
17:27I don't have to sit still for this.
17:30There is no reason in the world why I would have hurt Julie.
17:33Even if I had a reason, why would I risk my relationship with your mother?
17:36You pushed Julie in the closet to save your relationship with my mother.
17:41You were down near the equipment cage around three o'clock yesterday.
17:46Miss Gulch?
17:48I, uh, got your note asking me to meet you here.
17:51Mr. Lamb, how good of you to come.
17:53Oh, Norman, I love you.
18:01You're so, so, so well-dressed and prom.
18:10Baby, baby, what you do.
18:12Oh, shh.
18:16Someone's coming.
18:16It's that brat, Julie Burton.
18:22If she sees us, she'll rat on us to her mother.
18:26Then make sure she doesn't see us.
18:40Next to Ellis's, that's the stupidest flashback I've ever heard.
18:44I was nowhere near the equipment room.
18:48Oh, really?
18:51Well, then, if you were nowhere near the equipment room,
18:54then how come I found this note there?
18:58Dear Norman, meet me by the equipment cage at three o'clock.
19:01Signed, Ms. Gulch.
19:05You're sick.
19:07There's nothing between us.
19:08That note was simply...
19:08Yes, I love him, I love him.
19:10I love him.
19:13Beg pardon?
19:14Ever since he started dressing so great,
19:17I couldn't stand it anymore.
19:19Especially when he wears tweed.
19:22So I sent him that note so we could be alone.
19:25I thought we were going to soak the birdies.
19:29Those birdies could have been covered with an inch of crud.
19:32I didn't care.
19:33But I didn't push Julie in.
19:35All I wanted was lamb.
19:37Lamb, the teaching man.
19:39Really, Eileen, I didn't know anything about this.
19:42You never wore tweed for me.
19:48I'm going to go get some more Cheetos.
19:50I'm sure I won't be missed.
19:54Well, teaching man.
20:00Teach us about this note.
20:01I admit, that's my note.
20:02But I didn't take it to the equipment room.
20:06Well, then, whoever left this note there also left this.
20:13One long, blonde hair.
20:17This will tell us whodunit.
20:20It's probably just Julie's, Mr. Detective.
20:24No, because, you see, Julie's a natural blonde.
20:27And this one has a dark root.
20:33So we're looking for a bleach job.
20:36Question is, does she or doesn't she?
20:41Nylon.
20:41It's rootless.
20:48Nature's very best.
20:50Well, this doesn't make sense.
21:02There's got to be a bleached blonde in this room.
21:05More Cheetos, anyone?
21:06Uh, Mom, were you at school yesterday?
21:19Yes, I was.
21:20I was looking for Miss Gulch.
21:24I heard you talking about her,
21:26and when I found that note in Norman's pocket,
21:28I got a little jealous.
21:30I decided to go down to the school
21:32just to get a glimpse at this gulch.
21:34I wanted to surprise her, so I didn't knock.
21:37I just opened the door.
21:46Nobody was there.
21:48I felt a little silly,
21:50so I crumpled up the note,
21:51and I threw it away.
21:54Mom, that was the equipment cage.
21:58It's in Gulch's office.
22:00Are you saying that I'm the one
22:02that locked you in the cage?
22:03Oh, honey, I feel terrible.
22:06It's okay, Mom.
22:07You just ruined my life, is all.
22:11At least you still have your hair, you cow.
22:17You bald little...
22:19All right.
22:19All right.
22:30Well, Eli, I guess our work is done.
22:34Come on, let's go over to Spencer's house.
22:37Girls!
22:39Girls!
22:39Oh, hello, Mr. Donatelli.
22:43I hate you, kids.
22:48It doesn't come off.
22:58Thank you, and good night.
23:02It doesn't become loose.
23:09My man.
23:12I hate you, kids.
23:13All right, let's soak.
23:17And we'll see you next week.
23:19All right.
23:19All right.
23:20All right.
23:20I'll see you next week.
23:20And I'll see you next week.
23:21Thank you, Dan.
23:21Do you want me too soon?
23:23Okay.
23:24Thank you so much.
23:24I'll see you next week.
23:24All right.
23:27Thanks.
23:27You're all right.
23:28Me.
23:29All right.
23:30Good.
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