Jennette McCurdy opens up about 'addictive' age-gap relationship from her teen years

New York Post

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00:00Having sex with him was — there was this — the only way I can describe it is that

00:04there was an addictive component, where it was, that's the thing that I'm chasing,

00:07that's the thing that I'm — my nervous system is sort of hijacked in waiting for.

00:13And then when it happens afterward, there's the crash,

00:16and then it just kind of ramps up again in anticipation for the next sexual encounter.

00:20Jeanette McCurdy is opening up about one of the most painful and complicated chapters of her life.

00:26On the Call Her Daddy podcast, the former Nickelodeon star shared intimate details

00:31about what she now describes as an addictive relationship with a much older man when she

00:36was a teenager. McCurdy told host Alex Cooper that she was just 17 or 18 years old when she became

00:42involved with a man in his mid-30s — someone she met while working on the set of iCarly. Now 33,

00:48she chose not to reveal his identity, but spoke candidly about how the relationship began.

00:53A lot of like hanging out on set, a lot of hanging around the writer's room — hang

00:58out in the writer's room after work. He would show me movies that he thought I would like,

01:03like Dazed and Confused, which I did not like, but I pretended to like.

01:08He would play me music that he liked, which I did not like, but I pretended to like.

01:12But beneath the attention was a troubling reality. The man was already living with a girlfriend,

01:16and McCurdy says she was only given brief windows of his time.

01:20She described being on constant standby, rushing to see him whenever he called,

01:25calling the dynamic exhausting and emotionally draining.

01:28Things grew more complicated when he suggested ending his primary relationship,

01:32only after McCurdy said she couldn't do it anymore.

01:36During that period she says she pushed sexual boundaries, including an encounter she described

01:40as deeply uncomfortable and confusing, especially given her sheltered upbringing.

01:45McCurdy explained that she was Mormon, homeschooled, and fully intended to wait until marriage to have

01:50sex. At first their relationship felt, in her words, very high school, making out, and dry humping.

01:56But she says that power imbalance slowly shifted things further.

01:59There were phrases like, you know, similar to,

02:01I have to know that my needs are going to be met. Like, this is something that I'm,

02:05I'm a blank year old man, mid-30s man, and this is something that I'm used to,

02:09and this is something I have to know.

02:10Eventually, McCurdy says she did have sex with him,

02:13a choice she now views through the lens of manipulation and emotional dependence.

02:18She described the intimacy as addictive, explaining that the anticipation and emotional highs

02:23were followed by inevitable crashes, a cycle that mirrored the rise and fall of the relationship

02:28itself. The relationship ultimately ended around the time her mother, Deborah McCurdy, died in 2013,

02:34though the two briefly reconnected afterward. McCurdy is revisiting that period while promoting her

02:39upcoming novel, Half His Age, out January 13th. She says writing has helped her confront emotions she

02:45didn't realize were still unresolved. Elsewhere in the episode, McCurdy also reflected on her late

02:51mother, whose abuse she detailed in her 2022 memoir, I'm Glad My Mom Died. While she says there's still

02:57a lot to unpack, she shared that she's reached a place of peace.

03:01I'm able to just miss her sometimes, which is something that I will take full credit for.

03:10You know, I think she left me with a lot of shit to kind of parse through.

03:19Jeannette McCurdy's story is a stark reminder of how power dynamics, fame, and vulnerability can collide,

03:25and how reclaiming your voice, even years later, can be part of healing.

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