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00:00Ben Affleck, Aaron Doherty, and music from Molly Tunnel with The Three Tones.
00:08And now, Jimmy Kimmel Live!
00:26Have a great night. Thank you.
00:28Hi, everybody. Happy New Year on Jimmy. I'm the host.
00:32Thank you. Thank you for watching. Please settle in.
00:35We have so much to cover. I want to...
00:38Thanks for joining us. We did it. We made it.
00:41We survived 2025. And for a minute there, it was touch and go.
00:44It didn't seem like it was going to happen.
00:46And now, we look forward to all the horrors the new year will bring.
00:50Imagine if it's worse. Did you have a good break, Guillermo?
00:53It was great. Fantastic.
00:55You went to Cancun, right? Yeah, beautiful weather.
00:57Cancun, as you told me you went.
00:59Cancun, yes.
01:00And they let you back in, no problem?
01:01Yeah, no problem.
01:03Remember what I told you if they mention my name, what do you say?
01:06No speak English.
01:07That's right.
01:08That's right.
01:09Donald Trump did so much crazy stuff over the last two weeks.
01:15It would take a nine-part Ken Burns documentary series to cover it all.
01:18But I'm going to do my best to boil it down.
01:20You know, he hosted an award show over the break.
01:23After boasting about what a great host he is and how much better he is than I am
01:27and how huge his ratings would be, Trump hosted the lowest rated Kennedy Center honors telecast of all time.
01:36I'll tell you something.
01:39I'd hate to be the White House intern that had to tear that headline out of all the papers and eat them.
01:44You know, as I recall, he said he would step down if this happened, right?
01:48He said, if I can't beat out Jimmy Kimmel, then I don't think I should be president.
01:52And, well, hey, a deal is a deal. Back to Mar-a-Lago, you don't.
01:58And also missed out on this gem from December 19th when, at a rally in North Carolina,
02:04he finally broke his silence on the first lady's underpants.
02:08Her undergarments, no reason, is sometimes referred to as panties.
02:13That's right. Sometimes...
02:15I can't think of a more fitting or vomitous way to end a terrible year
02:19than hearing Donald Trump use the word panties on television.
02:22That should be a war crime.
02:24It is amazing that he even has time to say the word panties.
02:28Over the last two weeks, since we left for break,
02:30Trump posted on Truth Social 556 times.
02:34Behold, the ramblings of a madman. That is real.
02:39He was in an especially festive mood on Christmas Eve.
02:42Now, just after our show ended, around 12.30 a.m., he threatened to terminate us.
02:47He said if network newscasts and their late-night shows are almost 100% negative
02:52to President Donald J. Trump, MAGA, and the Republican Party,
02:55shouldn't their very valuable broadcast licenses be terminated?
02:59I say yes. And to all, a good night.
03:02This is the...
03:03This is the vision of sugar plums that are dancing in his head as he goes to sleep.
03:07And then St. Nicholas offered this cheery salutation.
03:10He wrote,
03:12Merry Christmas to all, including the many sleazebags who love Jeffrey Epstein.
03:16Leave it to Trump to wish Merry Christmas to himself.
03:19And then he closed with this ominous message.
03:27Enjoy what may be your last Merry Christmas.
03:30What is that? What is he trying to tell us?
03:33He's going down. He's taking us with him. I don't know.
03:36But fortunately, he did not share that sentiment with a group of children.
03:40They lined up to speak to him.
03:41On the night before Christmas, the President and First Lady
03:44took part in an annual tradition of chatting on the phone with kids
03:48who were calling into the Santa tracker hotline.
03:50They reroute them to the White House.
03:52And this is the kind of situation where he really shines.
03:56Well, we track Santa all over the world.
03:58We want to make sure that Santa is being good.
04:01Santa is a very good person.
04:03We want to make sure that he's not infiltrated.
04:06That we're not infiltrating into a country of banned Santa.
04:10So we found out that Santa is good.
04:13Santa loves you. Santa loves Oklahoma like I do.
04:17You know, Oklahoma was very good to me in the election.
04:19So I love Oklahoma.
04:21Don't ever leave Oklahoma, okay?
04:24Okay, I'll try.
04:28That's good.
04:30Is it at all possible that Donald Trump is unfamiliar
04:33with the concept of Santa Claus?
04:35Or unfamiliar with the concept of children?
04:38He's telling a 10-year-old he won Oklahoma.
04:42Hey, let's go to line three, shall we?
04:45This is Krill.
04:46Hi, Krill.
04:47This is Krill.
04:48I'm in Pennsylvania.
04:49Right, I know.
04:50Pennsylvania's great.
04:52We won Pennsylvania.
04:54Actually, three times, but we won Pennsylvania.
04:58We won it in a landslide, so I love Pennsylvania.
05:02Can you imagine not just bragging to children,
05:05which is very strange, but also being the president
05:08of the United States and bragging to children?
05:11How much affirmation does this man need?
05:14And then for the third time in five years,
05:17he enlisted Vanilla Ice to perform
05:19at his Mar-a-Lago New Year's Eve party,
05:21which is a lot of times for a guy with one song.
05:25What year were they ringing in, 1991?
05:39I mean, President Trump said his New Year's resolution this year
05:42is peace on Earth, and that lasted for just under two days.
05:46If you were wondering how bad these Epstein files are for Trump,
05:50turns out they're invade Venezuela bad.
05:53This is literally the plot of the movie Wag the Dog.
05:56The president gets caught in a sex scandal,
05:58so he attacks a smaller country to distract us,
06:01and here we are, distracted.
06:03On Saturday, Venezuelan President Nicolas Maduro and his wife
06:07were captured by Delta Force at their home in Caracas
06:10and brought to New York.
06:11Trump watched the operation unfold in real time
06:14from the bunker in his basement at Mar-a-Lago.
06:17You can see there he is with, uh, Hegseth and Marco Rubio.
06:20This mission was called Operation Absolute Resolve,
06:24which is a title that was definitely generated by ChatGBT.
06:28Venezuela has the largest oil reserves in the world,
06:32especially now that Diddy is locked up.
06:34And so...
06:35After months of...
06:39of escalation, Trump decided Maduro had to go.
06:44And, yes, he's a criminal and a dictator
06:47who's driven his country into financial ruin
06:49while he and his family have lined their own pockets,
06:52but Maduro is no saint either.
06:55And...
06:57So, with Maduro out, the question is,
07:00who is gonna run Venezuela?
07:03And the answer is this guy.
07:05We're going to run the country until such time
07:08as we can do a safe, proper, and judicious transition.
07:13So...
07:14So we are going to run the country until such time
07:17as we can do a safe, proper, and judicious transition.
07:22And it has to be judicious,
07:26because that's what we're all about.
07:29That word I can barely say, judicious?
07:33You cook, I'll judicious.
07:35It's...
07:36That's what we're gonna be.
07:39It might be...
07:41I mean...
07:43I...
07:44I think he might be gargling NyQuil or something.
07:46He's gonna run Venezuela?
07:48He can't even run the country he runs!
07:51This is like if JCPenney decided to buy Sears.
07:54For ten years,
07:55he's been promising this plan for healthcare.
07:57Now he's running another country
07:59that I guarantee you he could not find on a map.
08:02I would bet anything on that.
08:04What is he thinking?
08:05Is running the United States not enough?
08:07I mean, if you're looking for a challenge,
08:09try a sit-up.
08:10Do something other than...
08:12So here's Maduro arriving in New York in handcuffs.
08:1540% chance Trump thinks he captured Saddam Hussein.
08:20But with the specter of Epstein
08:22and his approval ratings
08:24and the golden toilet,
08:25Trump needed a win,
08:26something his MAGA minions could grow about,
08:28and none more so
08:29than that little teat-suckler Lindsey Graham.
08:32To my Democratic friends,
08:34you should be celebrating this.
08:36When Bin Laden went down,
08:38I was the first to applaud President Obama.
08:41By the way, you know,
08:42you mentioned something that's interesting.
08:45Lindsey mentioned Bin Laden.
08:47You know, I wrote about Bin Laden
08:49one year before the attack on the World Trade Center,
08:51and I said,
08:52you've got to go after Bin Laden.
08:53It was in my book.
08:54Okay, so here's how you know when Trump is lying.
08:57This is his tell. I finally figured it out.
08:59He doesn't just lie once.
09:00He does it a second time.
09:02If they would have listened to me,
09:04they would have taken out Bin Laden,
09:06then you wouldn't have had the World Trade Center tragedy.
09:08Yeah, this is certainly going...
09:09Did you know that?
09:10I predicted Bin Laden...
09:11I learned something every day.
09:12No, but did you hear that?
09:13Well, I didn't.
09:14I just heard it right now.
09:15No, I wrote a book.
09:16It was one year before the attack
09:19that the book came out,
09:21and it talked about there's a whole page,
09:23a whole section dedicated to a guy named Bin Laden,
09:26who's the bad guy who you have to take out.
09:29So, I'll get the book.
09:31You don't have to get the book, Lindsey.
09:35We checked.
09:36He says nothing of the kind.
09:38There's a brief mention of Bin Laden,
09:39written two years after Clinton
09:41indicted him on charges of terrorism
09:43and sent cruise missiles in to destroy his camp.
09:45There's no warning.
09:46There's no prediction.
09:47There's none of that, any of that stuff.
09:49But I do look forward to when Lindsey Graham gets the book
09:52and sets the record straight.
09:53But so now, with Venezuela under his belt,
09:56Trump's been ramping up threats on Mexico,
09:58Colombia, even Greenland.
10:00He says we need Greenland for national security
10:03and that the EU should make that happen for us.
10:06Trump has always had a thing for Greenland.
10:08It's, um, Greenland.
10:09It's cold.
10:10It's icy and white, just like the woman he married.
10:13And so he feels...
10:14And, of course, China is very excited about all this.
10:19They've been looking at Taiwan
10:20like it's a tasty little piece of dim sum.
10:23And now anything goes.
10:24You can just take what you want.
10:25It all seems very...
10:27It's almost comic book crazy.
10:29But Trump says there's nothing wrong with him.
10:31He said the White House doctors have reported
10:33he's in perfect health
10:35and that I aced meaning was correct
10:38on 100% of the questions asked.
10:40He defines the word aced for...
10:42Like we're the ones with dementia.
10:44I aced for the third straight time my cognitive exam,
10:48something which no other president
10:50or previous vice president was willing to take.
10:53Or asked to take, by the way.
10:54These cognitive exams...
10:56They're about as difficult as the maze
10:58on the back of the box of Captain Crunch.
11:01But he's still very proud of his performance.
11:04But I've taken now three cognitive tests.
11:06I've got...
11:07I've aced every single one of them.
11:09And...
11:14They're clapping for that.
11:16Listen, I'm not sure being asked
11:18to take three cognitive exams
11:20is quite the flex he thinks it is.
11:22I did something no other president's ever done.
11:24I took cognitive tests.
11:26Because I know that...
11:28And by the way, not easy.
11:30Not easy.
11:31Oh, well...
11:32Tell us about the questions you answered.
11:34You know, the first question is like...
11:36What is this?
11:37And they show a lion, a giraffe, a fish...
11:40and a hippopotamus, right?
11:44And they say, which is the giraffe?
11:47So that's the only question.
11:50But what happens is it then gets harder.
11:53Harder than that?
11:55I don't know.
11:56I find that hard to believe.
11:57You know, we've been hearing so much
11:58about these cognitive tests he keeps acing.
12:01You guys know what ace means?
12:03Okay.
12:04All right.
12:05And I've offered him the opportunity
12:06to take the test live on television.
12:08He still hasn't gotten back to me on it.
12:10So in the interest of fairness,
12:11and also to get a sense of what he keeps babbling about,
12:14we got in touch with a doctor
12:15who gives this test regularly,
12:17these cognitive exams.
12:19And I asked her to administer one to me.
12:22This is the official exam administered
12:24by a medical professional.
12:25I did not see the questions ahead of time.
12:27And I'm willing to release the full
12:29unedited version if necessary.
12:31But with that said, let's find out
12:33just how difficult this big, beautiful test is
12:36and how my brain stacks up against
12:38our stable genius presidents.
12:43This is Dr. Swanson.
12:44What kind of doctor are you, Dr. Swanson?
12:46I'm an internal medicine doctor.
12:47And that means inside, right?
12:49Yes.
12:50Do I pass?
12:51That's a good start though, right?
12:53Real solid start?
12:54Good start.
12:55What kind of people typically get this cognitive exam?
12:57It's usually for our patients that are 65 and over
13:00as part of their annual physical.
13:02If I do poorly, will it affect my credit score?
13:05No.
13:06OK.
13:07Should I take my shirt off?
13:08Yeah.
13:09OK.
13:10All right.
13:11Should we get started?
13:12Sure.
13:13Let me get the test out.
13:14Is this the one that President Trump takes?
13:15I believe so.
13:16Oh.
13:17Great.
13:18So we'll really be able to compare apples to apples here.
13:20Yes.
13:21Or in his case, orange, right?
13:23OK.
13:24So I'm going to give you a pen.
13:25OK.
13:27And then I want you to start.
13:28How do you work this?
13:29Just click it once.
13:30OK.
13:31All right.
13:32I want you to draw a line between a number and a letter
13:35in ascending order.
13:36So they already started this for you.
13:38So there's a line between the one and the A,
13:41and then the A to the two,
13:43and then you keep going until you get to the E.
13:45OK.
13:49OK.
13:50And then in the next box,
13:52I'm going to have you draw this design in the space below.
13:55OK.
14:00And then in this side,
14:01I'm going to have you draw a clock face.
14:02So a circle and then all the numbers.
14:04And then once you have all those on there,
14:06I'll tell you what time to draw the hands pointing to.
14:09OK.
14:10All right.
14:11And then I want you to draw the time as 11, 10.
14:1411, 10.
14:15A little one and a big one.
14:19Tell me the name of this animal.
14:20That's a lion.
14:21And then tell me the name of that animal.
14:23That's a rhino.
14:24And then tell me the name of that animal.
14:25That's a camel.
14:26I just saw Zootopia, so I know all the answers.
14:29Very good.
14:30The next is the real meat of the memory task.
14:32Great.
14:33I'm going to redo some words.
14:34OK.
14:35We're going to go through it twice,
14:36just so it really goes to an important part of your brain
14:38so you don't forget it later.
14:39OK.
14:40So the words are face, velvet, church, daisy, and red.
14:45Face, velvet, church, daisy, red.
14:46OK.
14:47And then for the next part of the test,
14:49I'm going to have you repeat numbers after me.
14:52So the numbers are 2, 1, 8, 5, 4.
14:552, 1, 8, 5, 4.
14:56Next one, I'm going to read a string of number
15:00or a string of letters.
15:01You know you messed up there, right?
15:02I did.
15:03I lost a point.
15:04Yeah.
15:05Every time I say the letter A,
15:07I want you to tap your hand on the table.
15:09Every time I say a letter that's not A,
15:11don't tap your hand.
15:12OK.
15:13A, A, J, K, L, B.
15:17That's really good, right?
15:18You're great.
15:19Almost musical.
15:20Yeah.
15:21The next one, I'm going to have you do some math.
15:23And so we're going to start at 100 and subtract 7.
15:25What do you get?
15:2692.
15:2793 minus 7?
15:2886.
15:29Minus 7?
15:3079.
15:31I'm going to read a sentence
15:32and you're just going to repeat the sentence after me.
15:34I only know that John is the one to help today.
15:38I only know that John is the one to help today.
15:40Tell me as many words that you can think of with the letter F.
15:43Ready, set, go.
15:45Fart, fish, flop, fan, funk, frantic, friend, flop, flip, flow, feel, freezing.
16:01OK.
16:02You already got our goal of 11 words and you still have 42 seconds to spare.
16:05Oh.
16:06What words do you think Trump came up with for the letter F?
16:09Let's see.
16:10No comment.
16:11Finances, french fries, fat.
16:16OK.
16:17And then for the next part, I'm going to tell you two words
16:20and I want you to tell me how they're similar.
16:22Train and bicycle.
16:23Modes of transportation.
16:25And then back to those five words I told you earlier.
16:28Can you recall any of those words?
16:30Church, velvet, face, is it red?
16:42Daisy.
16:43Perfect.
16:44So let me just add everything up here.
16:48You've got a perfect score.
16:50So I could be president.
16:53And by the way, that is...
17:00It's all up here.
17:02Hey, we've got a strong first show back for your night
17:04with Aaron Gordy.
17:05Music from Molly Tuttle.
17:06And we'll be right back with Ben Affleck.
17:08Hello there. Welcome back tonight.
17:21She is an Emmy Award winner for the show Adolescence.
17:24Her latest is called A Thousand Blows.
17:26Aaron Doherty is with us tonight.
17:28And then later, the multi-talented singer and songwriter.
17:32This is her Grammy-nominated album,
17:34So Long, Little Miss Sunshine.
17:36Music from Molly Tuttle.
17:38For our first week of the new year,
17:41we've got new shows with Nikki Glaser, Alan Cumming,
17:44Rachel Maddow will be here, Taylor Dearden from The Pit,
17:47Joel Edgerton, and Dennis Leary.
17:49And we'll have music from the singing voices behind
17:52K-pop demon hunters Huntrix will be with us.
17:55So please join us for all that.
17:57Our first guest of 2026 is a two-time Oscar winner
18:02despite being contractually obligated by Satan himself
18:05to star alongside Matt something or other.
18:07His new action thriller is called The Rip.
18:10It happens on Netflix one week from Friday.
18:12Please welcome Ben Affleck.
18:14.
18:31Very good to see you.
18:33Thank you, I think.
18:34Thank you very much.
18:35And it should be, Matt, congratulations on your,
18:38I believe it's the critic's choice.
18:40Thank you very much.
18:41.
18:44In fact, speaking of Matt,
18:47he wanted me to pass on a note.
18:49Oh.
18:50He wanted me to share with you, yeah.
18:51Oh, thank you.
18:52Which I thought was very nice.
18:53I'll read it.
18:54Oh.
18:55Dear Jimmy, congratulations on the critic's choice award.
18:58You should have gotten cancelled a long time ago.
19:01Maybe you would have gotten sympathy then
19:03and so you could have won more than one minor movie award like me.
19:06Anyway, it was a very nice note.
19:08No, it wasn't a nice note.
19:09Congratulations.
19:10I will take that note and I will save it forever.
19:13Thank you for bringing that.
19:14And I'm sorry you have to even know him.
19:16You won the, uh, you won the critic's choice award a couple of times.
19:19I did.
19:20Not unlike you.
19:21I benefited from some sympathy.
19:22Uh-huh.
19:23Did you?
19:24Well, yeah, it was like a year when everybody,
19:25it's the horrible thing of everyone's telling you all the time,
19:27you're gonna get nominated, you're gonna get nominated for director.
19:29This movie Argo that I did and everybody kept telling you as we were nominated.
19:34And so, of course, wake up that morning and sure enough, like, you know, and by the way, it's not like any other morning that I had not been nominated for best director, but all of a sudden it's a massive embarrassment.
19:46I woke up and people, you didn't get nominated.
19:49And, you know.
19:50Can I explain this a little more?
19:51Sure.
19:52Because I actually wanted to ask you about that.
19:53I was thinking about you last night.
19:55Because I was watching Leo DiCaprio at this critics choice award.
19:59Right.
20:00And I was thinking, boy, he's got so many better places to be.
20:03And the movie wins, best picture.
20:07The director, Paul Thomas Anderson, wins best director.
20:10And then he doesn't win.
20:11And I'm thinking, he must be so pissed that whatever, he got airlifted from a yacht somewhere and couldn't be there anymore.
20:20He came to lose.
20:21And I was thinking about you, because this is maybe the worst award show situation ever.
20:26I think you're underselling this.
20:28Because Argo, not only was it nominator for the Oscar for best picture, you won best picture.
20:35You starred in it and directed it.
20:37And you were not nominated in either category for a film.
20:41Like, it's as if the movie directed itself.
20:46Well, it's nice to be here.
20:47Yeah.
20:48Thanks very much.
20:49Well, you're bringing it back.
20:51That's sort of what it felt like.
20:52Yeah.
20:53And then the nice thing about it is the day of the snub, which all of a sudden, it's a thing, a negative event that's all of a sudden this horrible thing.
21:01Yeah.
21:02I had to go to the Critics' Choice Awards the day that the Oscar was announced.
21:05And I remember getting there, and there was like a red carpet line.
21:09It seemed like there were 500 people dying to talk to me.
21:12And you had to go, every single one of them was, hi, so the snub.
21:20Like, what do you say to that?
21:22Yeah.
21:23Yeah.
21:24It's a bummer.
21:25Didn't get anything to go down the whole line.
21:26And what are you thinking?
21:27Are you angry?
21:28But I did end up winning the Critics' Choice Award.
21:30You won the Critics' Choice Award.
21:31Yes.
21:32Now, if you think of you, like, you know what I mean?
21:35This negative event turns into a positive.
21:37It turned into a positive.
21:39And yet, it also then turned into a negative later.
21:42But were you angry?
21:44Were you, I mean, honestly, were you like, these mother, why would I even go to this?
21:49I'm being discriminated against personally in this category.
21:53Well, now that you put it that way.
21:55Yeah.
21:56No, I mean, honestly, it was just more embarrassing.
21:58Because, you know, I felt like, OK, I wasn't the one going out there being like, I'm going
22:03to get it.
22:04I'm going to get nominated.
22:05And so it was more kind of like having to be put through the ritual of then answering
22:09for why you didn't get nominated.
22:10Yeah.
22:11I didn't say I was going to get it.
22:12And so it was sort of, I mean, it was a little bit embarrassing.
22:14It was nice.
22:15Then I actually won, and I sort of, you know, I thanked the Academy.
22:18And I thought, oh, that's funny.
22:19That'll be nice.
22:20That'll sort of put it to bed.
22:21And then it kind of, from there, I ended up winning a bunch more.
22:24So I don't want to jinx anything.
22:26But I think you might win best picture this year.
22:29Yeah.
22:30That would be something.
22:31That really, I don't think a talk show host has ever won best picture.
22:34You never know.
22:35I think, listen, stranger things have happened.
22:37You did have another big win last night where the Patriots beat the Dolphins.
22:41That's right.
22:42And now we'll be playing the Chargers in New England, correct?
22:46Yes.
22:47Correct, yeah.
22:48And it's honestly, like, it's kind of shocking to me.
22:49I thought I'd have to wait another whole, like, series of lifetimes for New England to have a good football team again.
22:54Because my whole childhood, you know, it was nothing but my, because my father was, worked at a bar, but mostly made his money, like, being a little sort of small-time bookie.
23:03Mm-hmm.
23:04And, like, so I remember our first, you know, washing machine and our first VCR.
23:08In fact, Dad coming home, be like, you can thank Steve Grogan for this.
23:12He's the quarterback for the Patriots.
23:14Everybody keeps betting the Patriots to beat the spread.
23:17And so I really was grateful that the Patriots were terrible to thank Steve Grogan's knees for our VCR.
23:22Wow.
23:23Yeah.
23:24So your dad was open about that, that he was booking bets at the bar?
23:26He was.
23:27I know.
23:28I mean, at the time, it was, like, shameful and kind of illegal.
23:30Kind of?
23:31The statute of limitations had run out of it.
23:33Sorry, Dad!
23:34Uh, because now it's like, you know, FanDuel and whatever.
23:37It's like, you know, the trumpet.
23:38It wasn't kind of illegal back then.
23:40It was flat-out illegal.
23:41It was straight-up illegal.
23:42It was very illegal.
23:43It was.
23:44It was criminal.
23:45Everybody did it, but it was illegal.
23:46But it was, like, a thing that you had to be worried about.
23:48Yeah.
23:49But in Boston, everybody will bet on the Patriots or the Red Sox or the Celtics.
23:52No matter what.
23:53They can be relied on to keep betting.
23:54We never learn, apparently.
23:55We will bet on the home team, and they never beat the spread.
23:58And the bookies, you know, made a lot of money.
24:00I think these were, like, $10, $20 bets.
24:02Enough for you to get a VCR, and those were expensive in those days.
24:05It's not like they were expensive.
24:06It was, like, you had to show up on a forklift.
24:07Yeah, right.
24:08This was, like, a 300-pound.
24:09It was, like, a transformer.
24:11The thing.
24:12And it made so much noise.
24:13Yeah.
24:14It was, like, a whole thing.
24:15But it was, like, the coolest thing in the world, because you could tape live shows.
24:19Like, you could tape stuff.
24:20What were you taping?
24:21You know, this was, like, I got this VCR, and I thought, like, I can tape my shows.
24:25So I spent a lot of time waiting for Magnum P.I. and Simon and Simon to come on.
24:29Oh, really?
24:30Yeah, taping them.
24:31And then realizing, like, I already kind of watched it once.
24:34I'm not going to, probably not going to watch.
24:35Now, everyone can watch it, like, on Netflix and everything.
24:37Right, yeah.
24:38But it was that.
24:39And then when I started acting, it was, you know, I would, like, I did a Burger King commercial.
24:44And so then I was, like, constantly waiting to tape it if it came on.
24:47But I didn't know when it was going to come on.
24:49So they had to press pause and record at the same time.
24:52So it would be ready and just sit there through the commercial breaks.
24:54Like, nope, not my Burger King commercial.
24:57And then as soon as it did come on, I had to press record.
25:00But the rabbit ears, like, as soon as you touched it, the reception went bad.
25:03Yeah.
25:04The thing, and it was...
25:05The kids today don't know how hard we had it.
25:07That's right.
25:08It was a nightmare.
25:09No, in fact, kids today, my son just told me, asked me, like, a month ago.
25:15It was like, hey, um, can I get, like, 100 bucks to bet on sports?
25:19No.
25:20It's like, what?
25:21What do you do?
25:22He's like, my friends get $100, but if they lose it, then that's it.
25:25I'm like, oh, that's a real standard.
25:28What discipline?
25:29Like, so that you don't come twitching back, like, going, I know that Green Bay is going
25:34to cover the over in the second half.
25:35Wow.
25:36Did you tell them to call Grandpa?
25:38I was like, there's a reason your grandfather's broke.
25:41You want to be Pete Rose?
25:44He's like, who?
25:45We're gonna take a break, and we're gonna, when we come back, we're gonna see a clip
25:48from your new movie, which is great, by the way.
25:50It's called The Rip.
25:51It's on Netflix.
25:52We'll be right back with Ben Affleck.
25:59When I asked you upstairs how much was a Crimestopper tip for, you said about $300,000.
26:04That's right.
26:05No, wrong.
26:06Because whoever just called on the phone said no one needs to die in there for $150,000.
26:13The guy on the phone said $150,000?
26:14Yeah.
26:15So why are you telling me it's twice that, man?
26:17First off, back the up.
26:19No, man.
26:20Don't tell me to back the up.
26:21you.
26:22Tell me what's going on, Dane.
26:24Once more, for clarity, J.D., this is my crime scene.
26:29I will run it the way I see fit.
26:30You are not running .
26:32What you plan to do is torch what's left of my career.
26:35That is Ben Affleck and what's-his-name in the movie The Rip, which you can see on Netflix.
26:42And I have to say, I'm glad to see you two finally aren't getting along.
26:46I have to say, for those of you watching at home, that was probably like watching one of those, like, Chinese-dubbed movies, you know?
26:52Like, the brigands, they're in the hills.
26:55They're like, how many F-bombs were in that?
26:57Oh, yeah, right.
26:58Because we had to bleep them out because it's television.
27:00But you guys, this is a true story, which is crazy.
27:05Yeah, it's based on a true story, which is basically like what happened was in Florida, they started, if you reported like a stash of money, illegal money from ill-gotten gains or whatever, you could get a piece, a percentage of it.
27:17So immediately, people started, you know, reporting, whatever it was, ex-girlfriends, boyfriend, you know, people turning on each other.
27:24And, you know, all of a sudden, the police in Florida were showing up and getting all these reports.
27:29And at one point, they showed up and they thought they were going to see, I think it was a couple hundred thousand dollars, and there was $20 million in this house.
27:38And, yeah, and the thing is, you had to, like, the police have to count it when they're there, you know?
27:43Because there's a lot of, like, concern about people not dipping their hand in the till or whatever.
27:49So to count $20 million takes a long time.
27:51And meanwhile, they're worried that people whose money it is are going to show up and kill them.
27:55And, yes, we then took some dramatic license and liberties.
27:58But it's based on a true story, which is...
28:01My favorite part is the fight scene where you and Matt fight.
28:04And he used the stuntman, I assume, for that.
28:08Actually, he asked me to wear the Kimmel mask.
28:11Oh, he did. Oh, did he?
28:13He could really get into it, you know what I mean?
28:14Have you guys ever had a fist fight, a physical altercation in your many years as friends?
28:19No, not really, because, uh, no, we haven't.
28:21I mean, we, we, um, there were a few times where Matt, like, maybe got in over his head a little bit and needed some help.
28:28But mostly...
28:29Oh, you saved him from being beaten.
28:32I wouldn't, I wouldn't say that.
28:34Although, when we were doing the fight scenes, it did remind me of when we were teenagers and I started getting taller than him.
28:39Uh-huh.
28:40Which he didn't like.
28:41Yeah, yeah.
28:42All of a sudden, he'd be like, like, at his worst, he would say, like, I mean, if I had your height, forget it.
28:47I'd be like, you know, I'd win the dunk contest.
28:49If you had my three extra inches, you'd be in the NBA?
28:53If that's what you're...
28:55That's how he is.
28:56He's, yeah, he's so full of himself.
28:58It's ridiculous.
28:59It's kind of amazing he didn't get taller being so full of himself, right?
29:03You'd think that would make you grow.
29:05What is he, like, 5'5"?
29:08I think he's 5'10".
29:10He is 5'10"?
29:11He is 5'10"?
29:12Height of an average.
29:13Is that what he's saying?
29:14He's 5'10"?
29:15There's not a chance in hell he's 5'10".
29:18Guillermo, how tall you think he is?
29:20You've seen him.
29:21He's 5'5".
29:22He's 5'5"?
29:23There's no case in 5'5".
29:24There you go.
29:25He would know.
29:26He would know.
29:27I carried him out onto this very set.
29:29That's right, you did carry him.
29:30He did not seem small that day.
29:32I will tell you about it.
29:33Well, it's great to see you.
29:34Congratulations on the movie.
29:35It's called The Rip.
29:36You can watch it on Netflix a week from Friday.
29:39Mr. Ben Affleck, everybody, will be back with Aaron Doherty.
29:48This week on Jimmy Kimmel Live,
29:51Dennis Leary, Alan Cummings, Joel Edgerton, Taylor Dearhood, Rachel Maddow, and Nikki Glaser.
29:58Plus music from Debbie Gibson and EJ, Audrey Nuno, and Ray Ami.
30:04The singing voices of Huntrix from K-Pop Demon Huntrix.
30:14Hi there, welcome back.
30:15We have music from Molly Tuttle coming up.
30:17Our next guest is a British actor who won an American Emmy for the show Adolescence
30:22and picked up a Critics' Choice Award and a Golden Globe nomination along the way.
30:26Season two of her series A Thousand Blows premieres Friday on Hulu.
30:30Please welcome Aaron Doherty.
30:32I saw you last night. Congratulations. You won the Critics' Choice Award.
30:50Congratulations to you.
30:51Yeah.
30:56Do you go into that just knowing you're going to win?
30:58Because you guys have really blown the doors off everyone with this show.
31:02Yeah. Well, no.
31:03Oh.
31:04We didn't know it well.
31:05You know, like, we knew that it had done well at the Emmys, but if I'm honest, we were just there to have a good time.
31:10OK.
31:11And then that was the bonus.
31:12You had an even better time.
31:13Yeah.
31:14How do you think about it?
31:15Because then you have the Golden Globes coming up.
31:16Do you parcel out the speeches?
31:18Because there are only so many times you can say the same thing, right?
31:21Yeah.
31:22Basically, I woke up at 3 a.m. last night, whatever, the night before the Critics,
31:27and I was just, like, having a little mini freakout about what the hell I'm going to say if I have to go up there.
31:32But you just kind of riff it.
31:34You just go out there and you see what comes out.
31:35Did you do that at the Emmys?
31:36Because, as I recall, you used the F word on stage at the Emmys.
31:39I did.
31:40Yeah, yeah.
31:41And I didn't mean to.
31:42You know, we don't allow that here.
31:43Yeah.
31:44I mean, and you don't even really, you don't get it that much back home either.
31:47Like, you're not supposed to swear.
31:48But I just kind of got up there and I saw everyone and I just had to tell them that they were f***ing stunning.
31:55Is there anyone in your life that doesn't like that?
32:01Yeah, so, OK.
32:03I know.
32:04Anyway, basically, hooray, hooray, we won the Emmy.
32:08Got back to the hotel, had some room service.
32:12And then I was like, oh, my sister will be up now.
32:14So we gave her a quick FaceTime with the thing and, like, we were all screaming.
32:17And my mum just happened to be there.
32:19Like, they were about to go out on a dog walk.
32:21Like, we're screaming and I'm like, woo, woo, woo!
32:23And my mum just butts her head in and is like, can I just interrupt?
32:28I could have done without swearing.
32:29And I was like...
32:30Oh, really?
32:31So she, like, she actually didn't, like, she wasn't like, well done.
32:34I didn't get any word of, like, well done.
32:36She was just like, Erin, you really kind of messed up there.
32:38And do you have those words in the back of your head now each time you're on stage thinking
32:42about your mother and her disapproval?
32:44She was a little bit there last night, which is probably why I just kind of said my thing
32:48and got off.
32:49But I made a promise.
32:50What about the Golden Globes?
32:51The Golden Globes is a place where you can really let loose.
32:54I know.
32:55And I, I don't, I really don't know what's going to come out my mouth.
32:58So we'll see.
32:59Can I make a suggestion or a request?
33:00Do you take requests?
33:01Yeah.
33:02Nothing, every word that comes out of your mouth should be a curse word.
33:06Okay.
33:07Okay.
33:08No one has ever done this before.
33:09Like, literally every single word.
33:12No thes, no ands, no uhs, nothing.
33:15Just cur, just all the curses you can think of in a row.
33:18Okay.
33:19And then you walk off stage.
33:20It'll be the greatest moment ever.
33:21Oh, okay.
33:22Okay.
33:23Think about it.
33:24Um, so Steven Graham, who, um, for those of you, if you haven't seen Adolescence, you
33:32must see the show, is, he's the creator and the star of the show.
33:36He's also your co-star in A Thousand Blows.
33:39Yeah.
33:40So you guys are very, obviously you get along well.
33:43Yeah, yeah.
33:44This wasn't a coincidence that you're in this show together.
33:46No.
33:47So, well, uh, he basically, after, um, we shot A Thousand Blows for over a year, he then
33:55reached out, um, and eventually I picked up my phone and he spoke to me about this show.
34:00And I just said, yeah, on the spot.
34:02Yeah, right.
34:03Yeah.
34:04Just because you had such a good experience working with him on Adolescence.
34:06Yeah.
34:07And he's one of those guys, like, once you've met him, like, he is everything that you dream
34:10of.
34:11He is just the nicest guy with the biggest heart.
34:13And he cares so deeply about the people that he crosses paths with.
34:17And I'm just lucky that I'm one of them.
34:20I met him last night and I did get that sense from him.
34:22He just seems like a likable guy, the kind of guy you would like.
34:25Yeah.
34:26Whereas, and maybe this is, I don't know what, what this is.
34:29I think this is a compliment to Owen Cooper, the kid who is in this, is, I'm still frightened
34:34of this boy.
34:35Yeah.
34:36He's still, I don't trust him.
34:38Uh, he seemed very nice here.
34:40He gave me a football jersey and everything.
34:42Yeah, I saw that.
34:43He was very kind.
34:44He was a young boy.
34:45He was here with his parents.
34:46And yet he's, I think because he's either a great actor or actually a killer.
34:51I mean, who knows?
34:53I have a little bit of fear of him.
34:55Do you know what I mean?
34:56Do you hear that from people?
34:58I mean, having watched the show myself, I, I, I sympathize.
35:03Yeah.
35:04I feel like he's the kindest little soul.
35:06I would need to spend more time with him, I think.
35:08Yeah.
35:09I, I'm, I'm gonna like go team Owen here.
35:11Like you just, like, stick with him.
35:12I'm on team Owen.
35:13Stick with him.
35:14I'm saying this as a compliment.
35:15Okay.
35:16Yes.
35:17There you go.
35:18He'd kind of love that.
35:19Okay, good.
35:20All right, good.
35:21Because, yeah, I've, I've, I've felt this way after like certain movies.
35:23There are certain people like, like, even the lady who played the wicked witch in the
35:27The Wizard of Oz, even the coffee commercials, I was scared of her.
35:30Yeah, fair enough.
35:31That's like, I was terrified of like, no, no, no, no.
35:33I'm with you.
35:34I'm with you.
35:35I have like a thing about like Cruella de Vil.
35:37Oh, you do?
35:38Well, that's a cartoon character.
35:39Anything that she, no, but anything that Glenn, like she was my Cruella.
35:42Glenn Close is my other one from Fatal Attraction.
35:45Terrifying.
35:46She was so scary in, you were scared of her in the Dalmatians movie?
35:50Yeah, she was Cruella de Vil.
35:52I, you know what?
35:53That was the name I couldn't come up with, so I went to the wicked witch.
35:56No, she, Glenn Close is terrifying.
35:59She might actually be evil, I think is what we're learning here.
36:03What do people, when they ask you about adolescence, what do they ask about most?
36:08Is there a scene or anything specific there?
36:11Going back to Owen, I've had chats with him to confirm this, because I was like, is this just me?
36:16Or like, is this actually, is this happening?
36:18But basically, everyone is obsessed with the sandwich.
36:21With the, what was it, a pickle and something sandwich, right?
36:25A cheese and pickle sandwich.
36:26Is that like a regular thing here?
36:27Like, it's like a regular sandwich.
36:29If you're a psychopath, yes, that's something you, something you would eat, a cheese and pickle.
36:33Why, is that a regular thing over there?
36:34It's a cheese and pickle.
36:35It's like, it's just like a sandwich.
36:37Though here, that's missing the burger, is what it is.
36:39It's like a Whopper, but without one of the key ingredients.
36:43OK, so maybe, yeah, maybe that's why you're scared of him as well.
36:46You were like, who is this weird dude?
36:48That had nothing to do with it.
36:49OK, fine.
36:50Yeah.
36:51But no, basically, people would come up to me on the street and be like, tell me what the sandwich means.
36:55Oh, really?
36:56Yeah.
36:57And I wouldn't have an answer for them, so I'd just be a bit like, well, what do you think the sandwich means?
37:01And then they'd be like, well, does it mean that when he has a bite, he's like, blah, blah, blah.
37:05And I'd essentially just be like, you know what, I'm not supposed to tell anyone this, but that's right.
37:12I didn't know.
37:13I didn't know what to say.
37:14Oh, well, you know the meaning of the sandwich.
37:16Yeah.
37:17Well, it's great to have you here, and best of luck.
37:19And please, think about that cursing thing at the Golden Globes.
37:22OK.
37:23All right, I will.
37:24Season two of A Thousand Blows, it premieres Friday on Hulu, and of course, Adolescence is on Netflix.
37:29Aaron Doherty, everybody.
37:30We'll be back with Molly Tuttle.
37:37Thanks to Ben Affleck and Aaron Doherty.
37:39Apologies to Matt Damon.
37:40Ran out of time for him.
37:41Nightline is next for first.
37:43Her Grammy-nominated album is So Long, Little Miss Sunshine.
37:46Here with the song that's going to leave a mark, Molly Tuttle.
37:50You make the lobby call at 6 a.m.
38:15How do you look so good with no steak sugar?
38:22Don't mean to stare at you, but damn, I couldn't hide it if I tried to.
38:30And I don't want to wait another day, another minute, wondering how you feel.
38:35If you're gonna keep your feelings undercover when I come around, I can't deal, I can't deal.
38:40I know, I know, I regret it later.
38:44But you're so, you're so good in all the bad ways.
38:49Don't try to fix it when you break my heart.
38:53Knew when you hit me with your poison dart.
38:57That's gonna leave a mark.
38:59That's gonna leave a mark.
39:03You know it's hard out here in Hollywood.
39:12So why'd you have to bring the heat with me?
39:17If I was smarter, I'd leave you for good.
39:20But I like to play with fire.
39:24Cause I don't wanna wait another day, another minute, wondering if it's real.
39:30Are you feeling what I feel when you come around?
39:32Tell me now, what's the deal?
39:34What's the deal?
39:35I know, I know, I'll regret it later.
39:39But you're so, you're so good in all the bad ways.
39:44Don't try to fix it when you break my heart.
39:49Knew when you hit me with your poison dart.
39:52That's gonna leave a mark.
39:56That's gonna leave a mark.
40:11Ooh, you've got a certain je ne sais quoi.
40:15Ooh, you think you got me right where you want.
40:19I'm not where I want.
40:22I know, I know, I'll regret it later.
40:26But you're so, you're so good in all the bad ways.
40:31Don't try to fix it when you break my heart.
40:35Knew when you hit me with your poison dart.
40:39That's gonna leave a mark.
40:41That's gonna leave a mark.
40:45That's gonna leave a mark.
40:49That's gonna leave a mark.
40:52That's gonna leave a mark.
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