Amandaland - Season 1 Episode 01- House Party
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00:00Guys, guys, guys!
00:02Team talk.
00:03We're going to be late.
00:04Yes, I know. I just want to say.
00:06I know it's not ideal moving schools mid-term.
00:08And I know you miss Chipsick, but it will be okay, okay?
00:12Look, when I changed school when I was 13,
00:14I didn't know a single person.
00:15Within half a term, I was voted the most popular girl ever.
00:19How is that even possible?
00:20Mummy's talking.
00:21My point is, I'm a people person.
00:24And historically, our people are people people.
00:28Literally any of those kids out there could be your new BFF.
00:31Okay, so you get out there.
00:33You find your people.
00:35Okay.
00:41No! No!
00:42Not those people.
00:47Can't park here.
00:48Oh, sorry?
00:49No parking.
00:50Thank you, thanks.
00:55Hey, get back here, you!
00:57Get off.
00:58Just look at the city, you monkey.
01:00Have a lovely day, Darius.
01:01Hang on!
01:02I love you!
01:03God, I literally hate you.
01:07Shut the front door.
01:09Ah!
01:10Look at you!
01:11You're up to a funeral.
01:12No, I've got a work meeting at 9.30.
01:14Yeah, of course you have.
01:15Get in.
01:16I'll drop you off.
01:17Okay.
01:18Okay.
01:21So, you're Georgie and my Darius back in the same class again.
01:24Hmm.
01:25Must be the end of days, you leaving Chiswick.
01:27Oh, I'm done with W4.
01:29I'm all about Soha.
01:31Oh, what's Soha?
01:32Oh, it's, um...
01:34It's what the property experts call South Harleston.
01:37Oh, it's like that area around Wyrmwood Scrubs Prison.
01:40Yeah, but it's called Soha.
01:42It's Soha, Noha, E-ha, We-ha.
01:45Ah-ha.
01:47I'm actually glad I took the kids out of private school.
01:50They got way more chance of getting into Oxbridge from a bog-standard state.
01:53Haycroft is fantastic.
01:55Yeah.
01:56They've got a great STEM hub.
01:57Okay.
01:58And a rock choir.
01:59And the torture scene from A Clockwork Orange was filmed in the playground.
02:03Yeah, more of a book person, Anne.
02:05Well, it's actually based on a book.
02:07Gosh, it's so great to weaken it.
02:09Yes.
02:10After all these years.
02:12So great.
02:13Yeah.
02:14Because we were worried about you there for a while.
02:16What with your divorce and your shop, sorry, store closing and your falling out with your mammy.
02:22All right, Anne.
02:26Don't you worry about little old me.
02:28It's all good.
02:31So, what is the skinny with the school, please?
02:35Are there any movers and shakers?
02:37Any fun mums?
02:39Well, I'm here.
02:43Yeah.
02:44I think someone's dad is a coroner.
02:46Yeah.
02:47Oh, Morton's mammy, Della, she runs that restaurant, Shin.
02:50And I think...
02:51Back up with Shin.
02:52Yeah.
02:53You know that place beside the megachurch that used to be Debenham's?
02:56Yeah.
02:57And now Shin, Anne.
02:58Oh, yeah.
02:59That Osabuco is off the charts.
03:02Wow.
03:04Key change.
03:05Are you and Della Frye bum chums?
03:06Oh, God, no, no, no.
03:08I sometimes see her at football, but she mostly keeps herself to herself.
03:11What football?
03:12All our kids play for Hounslow Eagles.
03:14Right.
03:15Hounslow Eagles.
03:16Yeah.
03:17I'm afraid, Anne, I'm going to have to drop you here.
03:19Oh, yeah.
03:20We're just nowhere near the station.
03:21I'm sorry.
03:22I've just got enough charge to get myself home.
03:24Oh, yeah.
03:25Okay.
03:26There's the price I pay for going green.
03:28Oh, would you put that in the bin on your way?
03:32Yeah, of course.
03:33Siri, nearest Sports Direct.
03:56Mal.
03:57Yep, me again.
03:58Guess what I'm going to ask?
04:00As you know, I need to park there to charge my car.
04:03I'm sorry if my saving the planet annoys you.
04:06It does annoy me.
04:07You've blocked me in.
04:08Can you move your car, please?
04:12There's a charging point literally down the road.
04:14Please don't mansplain.
04:15That is not mansplaining.
04:17Oh, so now you're mansplaining mansplaining.
04:20I'm going to be late for football.
04:21Hashtag me too.
04:23It's not what hashtag me too...
04:26Forget about it.
04:30Georgie, Manus, we need to leave in five minutes.
04:37What?
04:38The Wi-Fi's gone off!
04:39Mama!
04:40No!
04:41I'm trying to get back to the corner.
04:42Oh, darling, let me in before I get mugged.
04:45What can I do for you, Mummy?
04:46We're going out.
04:47I love how you've made your little house look so swishy.
04:49I thought I'd bring you a little tuck parcel from Waitrose,
04:50now that you've only got a Tesco Metro.
04:51A little splash of wine, and some Earl Grey Chocks for the children,
04:54and goji berries for you.
04:56Oh, well, that actually will be really nice of my birch muesli.
04:59You're still doing breakfast?
05:00While I'm here, would you do up my brass ear?
05:01Why can't Joy do it?
05:02That's what you pay her for.
05:03Manus!
05:04Georgie, we're going!
05:05I'm not talking to Joy.
05:06Why you insisted I needed a PA?
05:07It's...
05:08Mummy, Joy is your carer.
05:09Oh, ridiculous.
05:10I'm perfectly capable.
05:11Now, just do up my bra and I'll be on my way.
05:12Come on.
05:13No, looser.
05:14Looser.
05:15Okay.
05:16Oh, look at you two.
05:17Sporty bobs.
05:19Kiss kiss for gang.
05:20Don't you?
05:21What do you want to do?
05:22No, I'm not talking to Joy.
05:23You're still doing breakfast.
05:24While I'm here, would you do up my brass ear?
05:25Why can't Joy do it?
05:26That's what you pay her for.
05:27Manus!
05:28Georgie, we're going.
05:29I'm not talking to Joy.
05:30Why you insisted I needed a PA?
05:31It's...
05:32Mummy, Joy is your carer.
05:33Oh, ridiculous.
05:34I'm perfectly capable.
05:35Now, just do up my bra and I'll be on my way.
05:37Come on.
05:38No, looser.
05:39Looser.
05:40Okay.
05:41Kiss kiss for gang-gan.
05:43Oh, I don't spend enough time with my little bears.
05:46Well, Mummy, you could come with us to football.
05:48God, no.
05:49Um, do you mind if I use your loo?
05:51I can let myself out.
05:52But you're going to have to help me out for my Spanx.
05:56Georgie!
05:59Brilliant!
06:00Go on the season, that.
06:01Shut up.
06:03Hiya, Mel.
06:04You're very brave out here roughing the slot in your shorts.
06:07No-one else wants to do it.
06:09I love being called a pedo for an hour and a half.
06:11Yeah.
06:12Hey, Dad.
06:13Hey!
06:14How you doing, fella?
06:15Oh, someone's discovered after she.
06:18Oh, get off, man.
06:20Well, there he is.
06:22The big man in the short shorts.
06:24No, I'd wear shorts like that non-stop if I had legs like yours.
06:29How's the baby, JJ?
06:30Uh, did Abs get that prolapse sorted?
06:32Yeah, no, she's doing great, thank you for asking.
06:34Don't be tempted to go for the vaginal mesh,
06:36because, jeez, it's a job getting that stuff out there
06:39once it's fused with your lining.
06:41Yes, I will definitely pass that on.
06:44So, here's in his bag.
06:46Abs told me to tell you his toothbrush and he's charging.
06:49Cool.
06:54Heading off?
06:55No, I thought I'd hang around.
06:58Watch a bit of the old footy.
07:00Didn't know you were a fan of football?
07:02Yeah, of course.
07:03I love it, mate.
07:04Can't get enough of it.
07:06In fact, if you need someone to be one of the flag bearers...
07:12They're desperate for someone to coach the under-15s girls.
07:15No, I don't think that.
07:17I'll put your name down.
07:19Yeah.
07:20OK, OK.
07:21She made it.
07:22Guys, you are going to love Amanda.
07:25We're old munchums from junior school.
07:27Hi!
07:28Hello.
07:29Hi.
07:30Do you guys know each other?
07:32Yeah, we're neighbours.
07:33I live above him.
07:34He's very much beneath me.
07:36Hi, I'm JJ, Ned's step-dad.
07:38Oh, sweet!
07:39Is there a viewing deck or, like, somewhere inside to watch from?
07:43Yes, there's a Bollinger Marquis just behind the men's bogs.
07:47That's very funny.
07:49He's joking.
07:50I know.
07:51There was a gazebo, but it got blown away in Storm Gerald.
07:53Are you cold, Amanda?
07:55Would you take my dry robe?
07:56I don't think so, Anne.
07:58Actually, give me the dry robe.
08:00Oh, yeah.
08:01Sure, of course.
08:02Listen, erm...
08:03Me and some munchums are going to sink some fizz later
08:05if you fancy meeting the Anne gang.
08:07You're more than welcome to join us, too, Mel.
08:09Oh, I can't tonight, Anne.
08:10I've got Ned this weekend.
08:11I've got the techniques out.
08:12I'm going to give him a crash course
08:13on some old-school UK garages.
08:15Oh, that sounds horrific.
08:16I'll definitely need to be out of the house.
08:17It's a yes for me, Anne.
08:19Oi, pedo!
08:21Are we playing a what?
08:23Oh!
08:24A few.
08:25She's talking to you.
08:28Right.
08:29Wish me luck.
08:30All right.
08:31Come on, girls.
08:32Let's get started.
08:33Oh, my God.
08:34There she is.
08:35Della Frye.
08:36Wow.
08:37Did you read her piece of the Evening Standard?
08:39They're opening another shin in Kilburn.
08:41Double shin.
08:42Right.
08:43Yeah.
08:44Oh, er, that's her wife, Fi.
08:46Oh.
08:47Wife.
08:48So, er...
08:49Oh, they're lesbians.
08:50Oh, right.
08:51Yes.
08:52Yeah.
08:53Like that.
08:54Yes.
08:55I got it.
08:56Yeah.
08:57It's the 20th century.
08:58There's no need to be so weird about it.
08:59Okay.
09:04How do I look?
09:05Oh, like a butterfly from a chrysalis.
09:11Oh, my God.
09:12Where is she going?
09:13Oh, I left you in charge for one day, Diego.
09:16It's just in a scallop.
09:17You're not splitting the bloody atom.
09:19Oi!
09:20Yeah.
09:21Get off the bench!
09:24Yeah.
09:25Oh!
09:26Oh!
09:27Oh!
09:28Oh!
09:29Hold on.
09:30It's okay.
09:31I'm fine.
09:32I'm okay.
09:33Here.
09:34I'm fine.
09:35Oh, God, I see.
09:37I'm fine.
09:38It's fine.
09:40Oh.
09:41Hi.
09:42Hi.
09:43Your coat's fucked.
09:45Oh, God.
09:46Are you all right, babe?
09:47She's fine.
09:48Oh, don't worry.
09:49It's, um, it's last season.
09:50Okay, everyone.
09:51Mum?
09:52Can we please go home and eat your freezer?
09:55Sure thing, baby.
09:56Okay, Della, we're going.
09:57Oh, we're going home.
09:58Morton!
09:59Where are you going?
10:00You're supposed to be the goalie.
10:01She's freezing.
10:02Oh, my God.
10:03Are you okay?
10:04Yeah, thank God Della was there to rescue me.
10:06Oh, God!
10:07Can everyone please stop kicking balls at my head?
10:11Ah!
10:12Ah!
10:13God!
10:14Mommy!
10:15Shh!
10:16Oh!
10:17The hell?
10:18Well, you were out, so I made a spot of lunch and thought I'd have a little siesta.
10:23Please go home.
10:24Joy will be waiting for you.
10:25Also, I need to get changed.
10:26What for?
10:27I'm having...
10:28Actually, you're all right.
10:29It doesn't matter.
10:30It's only drinks with Anne.
10:31Well, I can look after the kiddywinks for you.
10:32No, it's fine.
10:33I'll be in and out.
10:34It's just a drive-by dazzle.
10:35Give Anne a boost.
10:36Can you please get out of my bed?
10:37Well, at least let me finish my wine.
10:38Ah, bloody Joy.
10:39First name Kill.
10:40She's a sociopath.
10:41I've heard about this.
10:42She's gaslighting me.
10:43Mummy, please go home.
10:44Yeah, what?
10:45Oh.
10:46What now?
10:47You've blocked me in again.
10:48Well, I thought you were staying in and playing your awful garage.
10:51No.
10:52No.
10:53No.
10:54No.
10:55No.
10:56No.
10:57No.
10:58No.
10:59No.
11:00No.
11:01No.
11:02No.
11:03No.
11:04No.
11:05No.
11:06No.
11:07No.
11:08No.
11:09No.
11:10No.
11:11Ned's been invited to a party at Morton, so I'm uber-dad for the night.
11:13Morton, as in Della Fry's daughter, there's a party at her house.
11:15Yeah.
11:16Our whole class is going.
11:17Oh, hello.
11:18Back inside, Mummy.
11:19Your babysitting manners.
11:21Er...
11:32These could be our people, Georgie, alright?
11:34So just be cool.
11:39Hi.
11:40Hi.
11:41Hi.
11:42So you found us okay then, yeah?
11:43Yeah.
11:44It was fine, thanks Morton.
11:45I love that top BT Dubs.
11:46Oh.
11:47BT Dubs, that's cute.
11:48Is your mum in?
11:49Your mum's just, er, because I bought some flowers.
11:50Yeah.
11:51Mums!
11:52Fi!
11:53Oh, the other...
11:54Yeah, yeah, I'm coming!
11:55Hey!
11:56Hi!
11:57Hi!
11:58Hi!
11:59I'm coming.
12:00Hey, you must be Fi.
12:01I'm Amanda.
12:02I just wanted to give you these.
12:03Well, Della, um, I don't know.
12:04This is, um, something for saving my life.
12:06Oh, like you're a sweetheart.
12:07Do you want to come in?
12:08Yes!
12:09Um, yeah, I'm sure I have time.
12:10I might just actually get rid of these first, though, because Della fucking hates lilies.
12:13Oh!
12:14Excuse the books.
12:15Oh.
12:16That is my ceramic kiln.
12:17Oh, do you put her?
12:18Yeah, well, that's the plan, though I do need to get a non-flammable floor.
12:21That'll teach me not to go on Amazon piss.
12:22Come on in.
12:23Hey, hi!
12:24Oh, look at you, sauteing away the floor.
12:25Oh, I'm like you're a sweetheart.
12:26I'm like you're a sweetheart.
12:27Do you want to come in?
12:28Yes, um, yeah, I'm sure I have time.
12:29I might just actually get rid of these first, though, because Della fucking hates lilies.
12:30Oh!
12:31Excuse the books.
12:32That is my ceramic kiln.
12:33Oh, do you put her?
12:34Yeah, well, that's the plan, though I do need to get a non-flammable floor.
12:37That'll teach me not to go on Amazon piss.
12:39Come on in.
12:46It's like watching a bear.
12:47Della, babe, this is Amanda, one of the moms from Morton's class.
12:50She bought you these.
12:51Amanda, yeah.
12:52There were some flowers in the flowers.
12:55Just to say thank you for being my hero at football.
13:01Oh, yeah, you're the one who went to our silver touch.
13:03I know!
13:05Yeah.
13:07Classic.
13:09Can I just say, I am such a big fan of your work.
13:14You must get that a lot.
13:15Yeah.
13:16I'm actually like a mega-foodie myself.
13:17I used to work for a house at Quo Vadis in my 20s, so...
13:21I know my parfait from my brulee.
13:23Yeah, well, they're very different foods.
13:25Yes.
13:26Yeah, I know.
13:27Do you fancy a drink, Bands?
13:28I'm just making a pisco sour.
13:29Ooh, Wells, yeah.
13:30No, I'm absolutely loving your crib, by the way.
13:33Oh, thank you.
13:34Yeah, so bohemian, but also, like, utilitarian.
13:37What are you doing asking her for a drink?
13:39I'm already cooking for 15 teenagers on my one night off.
13:42I don't have the bandwidth for small talk.
13:44Oh, come on, babe.
13:45She's new, and I just think she's a bit lonely.
13:48Georgie settled in okay at Haycroft.
13:50Yeah!
13:51It's a great school.
13:52We love it.
13:53It has a lot of problems.
13:54Totally.
13:55No, no.
13:56I mean, we love it for its problems.
13:58Apparently, if you're a film buff, you're like this.
14:01They shot one of the scenes from a chocolate orange in the playground.
14:05Yeah.
14:06Kind of cool.
14:07Oh.
14:08Morning!
14:09Doorbell!
14:10Oh, my God.
14:11Martin!
14:12Martin!
14:13Is that Jim Jiminy?
14:16Jimmy Chury.
14:17Jimmy Chury.
14:18Amanda introduced me, actually, to oats milk and face primer.
14:22And doing tricep dips using a kitchen chair.
14:25Yeah.
14:26She must have got lost.
14:27I'll just resend the what three words.
14:29What harm.
14:31Mattress.
14:32Indigo.
14:33Cattery.
14:34Okay.
14:35Great.
14:36The master at work.
14:38Dad, would you mind if I got a quick pic for my socials?
14:41I do mind, actually.
14:42I respect that.
14:43Well, I scuffed all the hot dogs.
14:44Oh, Fee, come and try this.
14:45Off the knife.
14:46Just like the Catalonia.
14:47That.
14:48Yeah.
14:49That is insane.
14:51Babe.
14:52Mm.
14:54I'll have what she's having.
14:55Just don't want to eat.
14:57No, no.
14:58No.
14:59No.
15:00I will take control of her.
15:01No, no, no.
15:02Well, I'm not even to take control of her.
15:04No, no, no, no.
15:06That is the cream.
15:07Don't getael.
15:08That's a great one.
15:10Oh, have a good job?
15:11And then, start off the knife?
15:12Wow.
15:13Do you mind if I got a quick pic for my socials?
15:14I do mind actually.
15:15I respect that.
15:16Just a little taste. Ooh, lovely. So amazing.
15:22Oh, I got it. Wow. That is some good cookery.
15:27Are you in the restaurant game, Fee? God, no. I was in fashion.
15:31Oh! Stylist. Of course. Hello.
15:34And interiors. I actually designed this place.
15:37Wow. What a power couple. Well, thanks.
15:39Uh, lost her little missy. I see you, Morton.
15:46That's cool, right, mums? Oh, no. Put that back, Morton.
15:49Thank you. I'm 14 years old, guys.
15:52Yeah, you never pair pork with Prosecco.
15:54Uh, go with a light red or... Hold on.
15:59Yeah, a robust white, like this. Okay?
16:03You know, I prefer them to be drinking here than on the streets.
16:06Yes. Yeah, I trained in France, and I like the relaxed approach.
16:10Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, me too, Della. I'm just the same.
16:13I love the whole...
16:16du pain, du vin, du borsin thing. Yeah.
16:20Right. Shutters down. Service is over.
16:22I am ready for a hot tub, baby.
16:25I'm going for a dip in the tub, Maureen, mums, if you fancy.
16:28She has no swimmers. Well, she doesn't need any.
16:30Um...
16:33Like...
16:35Skinny dipping.
16:36No, I mean, you can borrow some.
16:37Oh!
16:39I'm sorry, I hope you didn't think, cos you were both...
16:42Oh, no, no, no, no, no.
16:43..together that I thought that you would be...
16:44Sorry, that's so...
16:46I don't know why, it's so good.
16:48Great. Yes, I'd love to do brilliant.
16:50Yeah, yeah, yeah, great. No problem, don't worry, Della.
16:52Great, great, great. I'll just pop upstairs and get you some.
16:54You sit here. Okay, Della, wait for a minute.
16:56Good.
16:57I think I'm going to head.
16:58We're off to go eight, first thing.
17:00Uh, yeah, you'll meet Amanda another time.
17:02Hi.
17:03Yeah.
17:16Ah!
17:18Ah!
17:20Mal!
17:21Oh, God, hello!
17:24What about your lads now then?
17:25Well, Ned's gone to a party, so, you know.
17:27I've all that still to come, sure.
17:29Darius is still only little, yeah.
17:31I left him at home watching Gladiators
17:33snuggled up with Mr Blankey.
17:36Yeah, I can't really complain.
17:38If I had the choice between chaps and girls
17:40and watching my dad boil pasta, I know what I'd choose.
17:42Yeah.
17:43I know what I'd choose!
17:46Oh!
17:47It's Amanda.
17:48I knew she'd come.
17:49Hello!
17:50Oh, hey, Anne.
17:52Oh!
17:53You okay, Amanda?
17:55No, um, I'm not feeling great, actually, Anne.
17:59I lay down for a nap and I've literally just woken up.
18:04You two sound a bit awful.
18:06Yeah.
18:07Can I bring you anything?
18:08Uh, I'll be soiled.
18:09I think I'm just gonna stay in bed, Anne.
18:11I'm just so got into this short little gathering.
18:13Okay.
18:14Well, uh...
18:15Bye, Amanda.
18:16You rest up now.
18:17Bye, Anne.
18:19Amanda!
18:20Are you coming in or what?
18:22You're coming, Fee!
18:24Oh, God.
18:25This is so nice.
18:27It's so fresh.
18:28You can't even smell the chlorine.
18:29That's because I don't use chlorine.
18:31I actually did a homeopathy diploma a few years ago.
18:34Don't believe in chemicals.
18:36Right.
18:38Yeah.
18:39Tell that to Emma, I'll say.
18:47Oh, gosh.
18:48You think we should go check what the kids are up to?
18:49No.
18:51Oh, there she is.
18:52Let's get this party started.
18:54Fee!
18:55Put it in Zen mode.
18:56Yeah.
18:57Yeah.
18:59This is fabulous.
19:00Oh, that's nice.
19:06Oh, God.
19:07Sorry.
19:08Sorry, sorry, sorry.
19:09You all right, babe?
19:10Yeah, sorry.
19:11It's Sonny's carer.
19:13I hired her to take the pressure off me,
19:15and now I'm managing racism.
19:17Sorry.
19:18You don't need to hear any of that.
19:19Della went through all that recently with her mom.
19:21Oh, really?
19:22Yeah.
19:25It's brutal.
19:26Down straight.
19:29Would you like some mushrooms?
19:31Yeah.
19:32Yeah?
19:33Sure.
19:34Yeah.
19:35Thank you, Della.
19:36I love mushrooms.
19:37Although I'm going to go out on a limb.
19:38I'm not a big fan of truffle oil.
19:39I think once Cafe Rouge starts putting on its chips,
19:41it sort of loses its jaw a bit.
19:43No, no.
19:44Magic mushrooms.
19:45Della makes them with chocolate.
19:47Oh, cool.
19:48Cool.
19:49Cool.
19:50Cool.
19:51Cool.
19:52Cool.
19:53Cool.
19:54Cool.
19:55Cool.
19:56Cool.
19:57Oh, nice.
19:58Big bit.
19:59Yeah.
20:00Let's get back on the bubbles.
20:02Yes, ma'am.
20:03Now it's my night off.
20:04Hello.
20:05Oh, no.
20:06Yes, ma'am.
20:07Now it's my night off.
20:08Hello.
20:09Oh.
20:10Oh.
20:11Oh.
20:12Now.
20:13Yes, ma'am.
20:14Oh.
20:15Oh.
20:16Oh.
20:17Oh.
20:18Oh.
20:19Oh.
20:20Oh.
20:21Oh.
20:22Oh.
20:23Oh.
20:24Oh.
20:25Oh.
20:26Oh.
20:27Take him down.
20:28Take him down.
20:29Oh.
20:30Josh, can you hear me?
20:31You go down the gully.
20:32He's locked in.
20:33He's locked in.
20:34Manus.
20:35Is he dead?
20:36Manus, darling.
20:37One sec, Josh.
20:38Who are you talking to?
20:39My friend Josh.
20:41As long as they're not being groomed, darling.
20:44Do you want to go?
20:45Not with this risk, kiddo.
20:47Busted it shucking oysters.
20:49Mummy says it's osteoarthritis and you're only going to get worse.
20:52But does she?
20:54PHONE RINGS
20:56Mrs. Anderson?
20:57Oh, it's bloody Joy.
20:59She's found me.
21:00Shall I open the door?
21:01Absolutely not.
21:02Turn off the light.
21:05Mrs. Anderson?
21:06Are you in there?
21:08She's like the Terminator.
21:10Is she trying to kill you?
21:12Good ass.
21:13You know, she won't let me have a drink until five.
21:20Yeah.
21:25Oh, Christ.
21:28Should we?
21:29Do you think we should see if the kids are all right?
21:32No, it's fine.
21:33The shit we got up to when we were there, eh?
21:36We'd have been knocking butt fast.
21:38The old demon Ribena.
21:40I'm just going to nip to the loo.
21:45Mushrooms will do that to you, man.
21:47Georgie.
21:48Georgie.
21:49Oh, my God.
21:50Why are you here?
21:51Georgie, we're going.
21:53Bye.
21:55Why are you in a dressing gown?
21:57Because I was in the hot tub.
21:58Gross.
21:59Grab your shoes.
22:00I'll get my knickers.
22:01Oh, my God.
22:02Is that Anne's little boy?
22:03What have you been drinking, Darius?
22:04It's something called Armagnac.
22:05Armagnac.
22:06The G is silent.
22:07Darius, is this your phone?
22:08Call Anne.
22:09Call his mom.
22:10No.
22:11Call her.
22:12Why are you in a dressing gown?
22:13Why are you in a dressing gown?
22:14Because I was in the hot tub.
22:15Gross.
22:16Grab your shoes.
22:17I'll get my knickers.
22:18Oh, my God.
22:19Is that Anne's little boy?
22:21What have you been drinking, Darius?
22:23It's something called Armagnac.
22:24Armagnac.
22:25Armagnac.
22:26The G is silent.
22:27Darius?
22:28Is this your phone?
22:30Yeah.
22:31Call Anne.
22:32Call his mom.
22:33Can't you?
22:34No.
22:35Because it doesn't matter.
22:36Just say that Darius needs to go home, and I will tell Dalaran for you we're leaving.
22:40Do you want some water?
22:42No.
22:46There's Ned when he was two.
22:48Little fatty bonbon.
22:50He used to snuggle into bed between me and abs.
22:54Oh, yeah.
22:55Sure, Darius still does that.
22:57Oh, look.
22:58There's Darius.
22:59In his little helmet.
23:00For his rhombus-shaped head.
23:02Those are...
23:03Oh, God!
23:05I didn't see anything.
23:07No, no, no.
23:08Those are for the dermatologist.
23:09Just check that the moles in my chest haven't grown.
23:11I didn't see.
23:15Oh, Darius.
23:17Hello, bunny.
23:20What?
23:27Hey, Anne.
23:28Don't panic, but this is a nightmare.
23:31I've just had a call, and something awful has happened at Fiindella's house.
23:34Oh, goodness.
23:35Yeah.
23:36All the children are there!
23:37I don't know how they got there, but they're all there.
23:38So I've called all the other parents, and I'll get Georgie for you.
23:41No!
23:42No, no, no, no need!
23:51Hey, guys.
23:52Um, I'm actually going to have to bust a move.
23:55I know, Boo, but thank you so much for such a terrific evening.
23:59Oh, don't, don't be a boo-ba boss.
24:02Oh, I know.
24:04There's some parents here, and they're acting really fucking hectic.
24:08Is that they're not about?
24:09Are they not my one night off?
24:11Oh, for fuck's sake.
24:12Where's the towel?
24:14Babe.
24:15Huh?
24:16I'm really coming up.
24:18Georgie can let me by the car.
24:19Morton said I could sleep over and everything.
24:22Shh.
24:23Get off my car.
24:27Oh, my God.
24:28Oh, bloody thing!
24:30Right.
24:32I'll just charge her for a minute.
24:34Don't move.
24:45Darius!
24:46Darius!
24:47You all right, Ned?
24:48He is.
24:49I've checked.
24:50No signs of intoxication.
24:51Darius?
24:52Oh, Darius!
24:53My baby!
24:55That smells like Christmas.
24:57Has he been drinking Armagnac?
25:00I warned you about alcohol.
25:01I showed you that video of David Hasselhoff eating a burger off the floor.
25:04Shut up!
25:05Just go away.
25:06Where did you even get it?
25:07Was it Lidl?
25:08What?
25:09What is so funny?
25:11Sorry, nothing.
25:12Look, I just gave him a few bottles from the cellar.
25:15It's no big deal.
25:16No big deal?
25:17No.
25:18It's a very big deal.
25:19They're 15 years of age, for Christ's sake.
25:20Yeah, they're 15 years of age.
25:21I don't like your attitude.
25:22I don't like your attitude.
25:23Can we hold us?
25:24Oh, shh.
25:25No one told us that it would be booze.
25:27Are you all right there, Amanda?
25:28She's funny.
25:29Oh, the poor thing.
25:32Look, you made her come in all the way from her sickbed in Soha.
25:35What?
25:36I'm in and out and I don't want to give you my lucky.
25:38Just give you my car quick juice.
25:39You know what, Amanda?
25:40It's worse than we thought because Della gave booze to our children.
25:43Oh, grow up.
25:44That is not cool.
25:46What do you mean?
25:47You said it was fine.
25:48Huh?
25:49Have you been here all evening?
25:52No.
25:53I mean, I was en route to see you.
25:56You were balls deep in our jacuzzi up till five minutes ago.
25:59Oh!
26:00All right.
26:01Calm down.
26:02You lied to me.
26:03Hey, Anne.
26:04While you were sinking Chablis in the pub, I was saving your child.
26:07I was saving all your children.
26:08I literally waded through vomit.
26:10Was this after you dragged yourself out of the jacuzzi?
26:12All right!
26:13Everybody, please leave my house.
26:15Thank you, Della.
26:16No, especially you.
26:20You know what?
26:23Forget it.
26:24I'm out.
26:25Yeah.
26:26Oh, come on, big man.
26:27Come on, come on.
26:28Come on, come on.
26:29Come on, come on.
26:30Come on, come on.
26:32I came here tonight to find my people.
26:34Well, the people have spoken and they have said we are very...
26:41Not very nice people.
26:43Okay.
26:44Everybody get out!
26:46I'm serious this time.
26:47Clear off!
26:48hear off!
26:50Okay, everybody, get out!
27:04I'm serious this time!
27:05Clear off!
27:15F, my life!
27:17Let that be a lesson to you, you silly billy.
27:28If you have come to rub it in, Anne, do you want a lift?
27:33Sorry you had to come and get me.
27:35That's all right. I like doing boring dad stuff, I miss it.
27:38You hungry?
27:39Yeah, I'm hot loose with this, garsting.
27:44You're on sick ball duty.
27:46Is she?
27:47Yeah.
27:51All right, who's ready to rave?
28:01Hello?
28:04Mummy?
28:05Manners?
28:07Quick!
28:08Shut the door before she sees us.
28:09Who?
28:11Hello?
28:12Mr. Sanderson?
28:15I've come to take you home.
28:18Oh, well done.
28:19Oh, well done.
28:20TELL GISHES
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