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FunTranscript
00:00Dear Maxine,
00:03The money arrived in the nick of time.
00:07Hi, Choi. I'll always remember you.
00:09It's not safe to stay in one place too long.
00:12I bring too much heat to those I love.
00:14Thank God.
00:15I boarded a plane with some of Choi's Marxist comrades.
00:22The KGB presented me with a new name,
00:25Olga Rychbichkaya,
00:28and I was assigned a new job.
00:30Honest, noble work.
00:33Washing dance belts for the Bolshoi Ballet.
00:36The artistry, the grace, Maxine.
00:39It's worth every bleeding chill blame.
00:42And that's when I saw him.
00:47Vladimir Nureyev.
00:51That's right.
00:52Half-cousin to Rudolph.
00:58Maxine, I'm in love.
01:03The next few weeks we'll be playing the Kirov.
01:06After that, who knows?
01:08Warsaw, Samarkand.
01:10The world is wide open.
01:12So many countries and men to explore.
01:17Perhaps this is my true birthright.
01:21A free yet hunted woman of the world.
01:25I wish you the same liberation.
01:27Do-svidaniya, Olga.
01:32Linda is free and has found love again,
01:34while I am here, divorced, and stuck with my ex-husband.
01:37She's just cranky because she hasn't gotten laid.
01:39Oh, and you have?
01:40Because that's not what I'm hearing.
01:41We are here because she gave my ancestral home to a literal mobster.
01:49The only reason I did that was so Pinky wouldn't kill you.
01:52I don't need protection, Maxine.
01:54Stop protecting me.
01:56Maybe if you would have used protection with my manicurist,
01:58we wouldn't be here in the first place.
02:00It always comes back to that.
02:02Y'all need to work this shit out.
02:04Because you're working for us now.
02:06You've come around here so often they put me on your case.
02:09You're welcome.
02:10I just don't know why my club has to be the magnet for mobsters.
02:14Well, this is bigger than Pinky.
02:16Jay Edgar here is convinced that there's a Soviet operative
02:18here in Palm Beach.
02:19Someone above Pinky that's been running him all these years.
02:22Don't look at me.
02:24I'm not.
02:25It's someone connected and smart.
02:28So you want us to keep Pinky crummin'
02:30until the Russian mole reveals himself and then you bag him?
02:34Your club is our honeypot.
02:36Why should Linda have all the fun in Russia?
02:38I'm in.
02:42This is serious, Maxine.
02:44International serious.
02:46Keep your ears open.
02:47Pinky's handler can be anybody.
02:49Except him.
02:53Great, I'm gonna be late to meet Mitzi.
02:55Dinah's throwing her braby shower.
02:57I think you mean baby.
02:58No, Maxine, braby.
03:00It's a combination bridal baby shower.
03:03Sounds like an absolute gasp.
03:04Yeah.
03:05It's gonna be fun.
03:06It's gonna be a lot of fun.
03:07Well, I'm late too.
03:08I'm meeting my new partner, Pinky,
03:09to talk crimes and the best way to commit them.
03:14I love the new gangster me.
03:16I love brabies.
03:23Everything was all turned around.
03:26Douglas was married with a baby on the way.
03:28I had the Delacorte, a life of crime, and a new role to play.
03:34Hardly recognize myself.
03:40What about this one?
03:41Too much cleavage or not enough?
03:43Better than the last one.
03:47Hey, give me another nip of that nerve juice.
03:50You knew me.
04:03Here I come.
04:16Here I come.
04:32I know I down.
04:33Whew!
04:34Woo!
04:59Robert!
05:02Who's on the couch?
05:04You are.
05:08What?
05:16Maxine?
05:19Who are you?
05:22I'm Mirabelle.
05:24Your sister.
05:25A what?
05:34A what?
05:34Who is it?
07:13This is Douglas Delacorte's Braby Shower.
07:16It must go off without a hitch.
07:18And may I remind you, there is only one Mrs. Delacorte in Palm Beach.
07:23If this barbarian shows her face, she is to be barred at the gate.
07:34Is that understood?
07:42Yes, ma'am.
07:43Louder.
07:44Yes, ma'am.
07:44I've got a million and ten questions for you.
07:47Where'd you come from?
07:48What's your favorite color?
07:49Dog breed?
07:50Pasta shape?
07:51Why are you so drunk in the middle of the afternoon?
07:53Tennessee.
07:55Green.
07:56Schnauzer.
07:57Elbow macaroni.
07:59I don't normally over-tipple like this.
08:02I was just a little nervous about, you know, meeting the famous Maxine.
08:07Famous?
08:08Do go on.
08:09You're in all the papers.
08:10The next queen of Palm Beach.
08:13Your two-timing husband leaves you in front of everybody.
08:16Enough about me.
08:17Let's go back to you.
08:19Were you raised in an orphanage like me?
08:24Ma and Pa raised me.
08:26I guess they only had room for one.
08:28Eeny, meeny, miny.
08:30Mirabelle.
08:31Oh.
08:32What?
08:33Shoot.
08:34That's my mobster.
08:35It's a matter of national security.
08:37You stay here and rest, and I'll come back and we'll chit-chat for hours.
08:43Okie dokie.
08:43I'm just going to go to sleep and take a little nap and then...
08:51She's a drunk look-alike who shows up out of nowhere, Maxine.
08:54Oh, stop it.
08:55I can't wait to introduce her to Palm Beach.
08:57Maybe even have her move in, and she can help me with the club.
09:02We can call her Eminem's.
09:04Hola, mis amores.
09:07Welcome to Raquel's.
09:10Ah, that wall comes down to make room for the fountain.
09:15Ay-ya.
09:16Dale.
09:21Buenos dias, Evelyn.
09:23I'm here for my pound of flesh.
09:25Who do you think held those garbage mortgages you paid off?
09:31Exactly.
09:32I paid them off.
09:33You paid off what that pissant owed me, not my protection.
09:37For which I will take a vig, every week, cash.
09:41Raquel, I've come around on the dog track in the backyard, but I'm a little stuck on the name.
09:47What about it?
09:48I was thinking maybe my name could be at the front of it.
09:51Maxine's.
09:52Why would Raquel's be called that?
09:55For one thing, this is my house, and I'm a partner.
09:58But I have a wife, and the wife trumps everyone.
10:03And if I say no?
10:04Your waitstaff is union.
10:06I tell them to walk, they walk.
10:07A ver, a ver, a ver.
10:08Tu no et ta amedazando.
10:09You twerding us?
10:10He's not inviting us to a pig roast, Teddy.
10:12Well, it is almost time for my two o'clock sauna.
10:14I do my best thinking in the schvitz.
10:21Can't the club at least be classy like the Palm Royale?
10:25We both want to crush Evelyn here.
10:27Raquel's will be an after-dark destination.
10:30It can never compete with the fussy old Palm Royale.
10:33Only a dead body in the pool could take that place down.
10:37Maximo!
10:38Te estoy llamando, por favor.
10:40Viene aquí cuando te llamo.
10:41Oh, thank you.
10:46Palm Royale by day, Raquel is by night, huh?
10:51God bless America.
10:58Adios, Papu.
11:05Who the hell does he think he is?
11:09Who you calling?
11:10You don't want to know.
11:16Raquel's.
11:17Maxine's baking.
11:18Maxine?
11:18I have a pinky problem, which means we have a pinky problem.
11:23Oh, no.
11:25You hurt your wee little finger in a freak golfing accident.
11:28That's terrible, Evelyn.
11:29What are you jabbering on about?
11:31Did you hear what I said?
11:32Well, no one's going to want to see that mangle digit.
11:34I think new gloves are just what the doctor ordered.
11:37Are you having a seizure?
11:38I'll meet you at Seals, ASAP.
11:45Oh, Virginia.
11:47What does Evelyn mean she had a pinky problem?
11:49Evelyn's got an actual, not a metaphorical gangster, pinky problem.
11:52Freak.
11:53Tennis injury.
11:53I heard golf.
11:54Did you know that sporting injuries are America's silent killer?
11:58Number 12, to Seals.
11:59Bye, Virginia.
12:05Are those Braby checks?
12:07No, dear.
12:08These are political donations.
12:11After my speech at Marjorie Merriweather Post Square Dance, envelopes have been pouring in,
12:16mostly fives and twenties from impecunious lefties.
12:19But look, Mitzi, here's a check for a whopping $500 from the National Organization of Women.
12:29Who would have thought?
12:31Doug should have been here by now.
12:33Every time he's out of my sight, I worry Pinky's got in.
12:36It's not Pinky you should worry about.
12:39It's Maxine.
12:41Once the shine wears off the new girl, a man always remembers when life's about the old one.
12:49I'm still shiny.
12:51I'm glowing.
12:53I'm pregnant and shiny and glowing.
12:58Die, die, die.
13:00What?
13:00Die, die, die.
13:03Don't you see?
13:05This is from Norma.
13:07Why would Norma want you dead?
13:09She knows that I know that she killed Axel.
13:12She's trying to silence me.
13:16It's dangerous to be a Democrat.
13:30You left something.
13:32Miss me?
13:35Is that even your real voice?
13:37I also do French, Italian, and syllable-whistled language from the Canary Islands.
13:46I thought you were in jail.
13:48Out on bail.
13:49So I thought I'd drop by and pay a visit to some old friends in Palm Beach.
13:53I had a little surprise for your friend, Maxine.
13:57But then...
13:59Then what?
14:01I saw you, and I realized why I really came back.
14:04And it wasn't to screw Maxine.
14:07I'm not gonna fall for your lies again.
14:09I wish I could lie to you.
14:11It would be so much easier.
14:12Both of us being here like this, it's...
14:15It's kismet.
14:17Our second chance to run away.
14:28I'm with someone.
14:31Who's the lucky guy?
14:32The cop who arrested you?
14:39Well, that cop was very hot.
14:41Listen, I don't know what your plan is with Maxine,
14:43but you better leave her alone.
14:45And you better leave Palm Beach
14:47before I turn you into the man I love.
14:50If only you would turn me into the man you love.
14:52Please leave.
15:22W-E-A-C-F-M 104, West Palm Beach.
15:26And you're right where you should be.
15:28Hey, I was out at TV last night.
15:30Give me that cold drink and a little...
15:32I hope he's worried for me, whatever.
15:36I hope he's worried for me, whatever.
15:48Oh, man.
15:52Oh, God, yes.
16:04Now, look, Cory.
16:05Where have you been?
16:07Pinky.
16:07Hey.
16:08Hey, buddy.
16:09You disappeared on me.
16:10Yeah, I have been deep in the mines.
16:15Prepping for this braby shower?
16:18It's a combination.
16:19Baby slash...
16:21You know what?
16:26Never mind.
16:27You know, when you disappear and leave me hanging,
16:31I feel...
16:32I feel disrespected.
16:35I need a sign of respect, Delacoy.
16:38What are you thinking?
16:40Oh, your baby shower is tomorrow.
16:42Baby.
16:42So you can make it up to me publicly
16:44by announcing me the godfather of your child.
16:48Kid leather, cloth and lace.
16:56Everything we have in stock as per request.
16:59Hello.
17:03Grayman, a little privacy, please.
17:05For gloves.
17:07Have you seen her cuticles?
17:11What's with the gloves?
17:13It's not safe for us to talk on the phone.
17:15We have got to get rid of the Kimberly Marcos.
17:18If I tell you how,
17:19will you be my friend again?
17:21Will you let me back into the bummer now?
17:22Oh, for God's sakes, yes.
17:23I'll be your palsy-walsy
17:24and let you back into the club.
17:26Now, how do I rid myself of this mobster?
17:28You can't.
17:30That's the thing.
17:31Pinky is not just a mobster.
17:33Evelyn, he's being run by a powerful Russian agent.
17:36Wait, Russians in Palm Beach?
17:38I know, it's crazy.
17:40I've got to think of something.
17:41What would Norma do?
17:44She'd be an iron fist.
17:45She'd kill someone.
17:58You didn't like your steak.
18:00It's tough and all dried out.
18:04I'm sorry.
18:05I must have overcooked it.
18:08I saw you.
18:11With another man.
18:13And I'm not even allowed to be mad about it
18:16because I'm married.
18:17He kissed me once.
18:23And that's it.
18:29And then I told him
18:30to get the hell out of this town
18:32or I was going to have
18:33my beautiful, sexy cop boyfriend
18:36arrest him again.
18:39Again?
18:41Wait.
18:42Tom.
18:44Oh, my God.
18:46Tom.
18:47That, that was it.
18:49Tom.
18:50Tom.
18:52You were making out
18:53with the most dangerous con man
18:55in all Palm Beach
18:55and you told him I was your boyfriend?
18:57I wasn't thinking.
18:58I could lose my job.
18:59And my pension.
19:05My family.
19:06Tom.
19:06Well, go on.
19:08Where are you going?
19:10Come on.
19:11Well done.
19:13Like the steak.
19:27Somebody pinch me.
19:29Oh, Maxine.
19:31I always dreamed about
19:32having a slumber party
19:33with my sister.
19:34You dreamed about me?
19:35Of course.
19:37I always had a
19:38Maxine-sized hole
19:40in my heart.
19:41You know,
19:42before I knew your name,
19:43I would call you Annette.
19:47I had a hole, too.
19:49I crammed my Maribel hole
19:50with things like
19:52pageants and
19:53clubs.
19:56I crammed a whole lot
19:57of stuff in there.
19:58Now that you're here,
20:00my hole is full.
20:02Just
20:02tell me everything.
20:04Start from the
20:05instant you were born
20:06and they chose you
20:06and not me.
20:07Let's not focus on
20:08the bad stuff.
20:09I have an idea.
20:11Let's tell each other
20:11secrets.
20:12Oh, what kind of secrets?
20:14Deep, only
20:15tell your twin
20:16kind of secrets.
20:18Okay.
20:19I've been married
20:20happily for about
20:2120 years,
20:21which I think is a
20:22success in that
20:23department.
20:24But otherwise,
20:25I haven't really
20:26had much luck.
20:28Romance-wise.
20:30Really?
20:31You're so pretty.
20:34I've sort of had
20:35a bad track record.
20:37I tried to kiss
20:38a gay pool boy.
20:40I blew it
20:41with a lawyer
20:42who may or may not
20:43have been a
20:43gynecologist.
20:44Been there.
20:47I'm worried.
20:49Worried that you
20:49only get one
20:50great love in your
20:52life and then
20:52I found mine.
20:56My deep,
20:57dark secret is
20:57that maybe I'll
21:00only ever love
21:01Douglas.
21:04Anyway,
21:06your turn.
21:07Deep, dark,
21:08secret.
21:11Okay.
21:13My deep,
21:15dark,
21:16never told anyone
21:17in the whole wide
21:17world before
21:18secret is.
21:21I love Dick.
21:23Nixon?
21:26No.
21:27Ding-a-ling,
21:28schlong,
21:29peckerwood,
21:31man-rod.
21:31I get the gist.
21:34Men are all
21:34the same to me.
21:36You found your
21:37person and
21:38I'm worried
21:39I'll find anyone
21:40because
21:40why be with one
21:43man when you
21:43can have them
21:44all?
21:45That's the point.
21:48Let's play a game.
21:49Okay.
21:50Big spoon
21:51or little spoon?
21:52Oh, I'm big spoon.
21:52Me too.
21:53Okay, my turn.
21:55Have you ever
21:55done it in a bus?
21:57Like a greyhound?
21:58School.
21:59No.
22:00Have you ever
22:00done it in an ambulance?
22:03Welcome to the
22:04Braby Shower.
22:06Bridal shower gifts
22:07on the two top
22:08baby shower gifts
22:09under the cabana.
22:11My life is in
22:11grave danger.
22:13But the show
22:13must go on.
22:14Hello.
22:15Baby shower gifts
22:16under the cabana.
22:17Oh,
22:17Oh, thank you so much.
22:22I love it.
22:24You're welcome,
22:25mi vida.
22:26Anything.
22:27Or my godson.
22:28Or daughter!
22:38What did she mean,
22:40godson?
22:41You know me,
22:42Mitz.
22:43I like to make
22:43conversation
22:44and I might have...
22:45You might have what?
22:49I might have
22:50mentioned that
22:51the Kimberly Marcos
22:52could be the
22:52kids' godparents.
22:55Godparents are
22:55supposed to take
22:56care of the baby
22:57if something happens
22:58to the mother
22:58and father.
22:59And?
23:00They're going
23:00to kill us!
23:03Thanks.
23:04Thanks.
23:05They're
23:05lobsters
23:06and they're going
23:06to kill us
23:07and take
23:07all the money.
23:08All 82 million.
23:12Yeah,
23:12well,
23:14Mitz,
23:15this actually
23:15might be
23:16the perfect
23:16time to tell
23:17you that
23:17the actual
23:18number
23:19is
23:1941 million.
23:22Douglas.
23:23I told
23:24Maxime
23:25that she could
23:25have half
23:26of the money
23:26once the baby
23:27is born.
23:28You were
23:29just
23:29making
23:31conversation.
23:32Might have
23:33been a lawyer
23:33present.
23:37Doug!
23:38May I drink?
23:41Cheers,
23:42Douglas.
23:43You think
23:44you're
23:44caring.
23:45Little bundle
23:46of joy.
23:48You have
23:49no idea.
23:51Really,
23:52it's an
23:5382 million
23:54dollar ticking
23:55time bomb.
23:57No one
23:57is safe
23:58in this town.
23:59No one.
24:00Least
24:01of all
24:01me.
24:03Oh,
24:03hello.
24:04No,
24:04that goes
24:05over there
24:05on the
24:06two-top,
24:06darling.
24:07Go,
24:07no,
24:08on the
24:08two-top.
24:10God,
24:10my job
24:11is never
24:11done here.
24:16I guess
24:17some people
24:17just get to
24:18have stuff
24:18like this,
24:19don't they?
24:20Keep it.
24:21It's yours.
24:24Thanks.
24:28What were
24:29they like?
24:30Who?
24:31Ma
24:31and Pa.
24:33You've
24:33never really
24:35said anything.
24:35you could
24:37never accuse
24:38me of being
24:38a crack
24:39shot judge
24:39of character,
24:40but I'm
24:42pretty sure
24:43they were
24:43terrible people.
24:46That's
24:47disappointing.
24:49Trust me,
24:50you were lucky
24:50growing up
24:51in the orphanage.
24:52Oh.
24:54Meanwhile,
24:55I was hot
24:56wiring cars
24:56at the
24:57Joanne Fabric
24:58or robbing
24:59banks.
25:00What?
25:01You rob
25:02banks?
25:03Yeah.
25:05The best thing
25:06that came out
25:06of it was
25:07my karate chop.
25:08Mom and dad
25:08taught me kung fu
25:09to help
25:10with their
25:10bank robbing
25:11because they
25:12had a theory
25:13and they
25:13were right
25:13that no one
25:15would expect
25:15a little girl
25:16to come out
25:16of nowhere
25:17with a karate
25:17chop.
25:18It's pretty
25:19damn small
25:20too and
25:21chubby.
25:22This chubby
25:23little roly-poly
25:24thing would
25:25waddle out
25:26and karate
25:26chop you
25:27if you had
25:27conflicting
25:28feelings
25:29about
25:29mom and
25:30dad's
25:31bank robbing.
25:35Sometimes
25:35I still
25:35act like
25:36a baby
25:36when I
25:36do it
25:37just to
25:37catch
25:38people
25:38off guard.
25:41So
25:42that's
25:44what got
25:44them locked
25:45up after
25:45all.
25:46Oh no,
25:47they got
25:47away with
25:47all that
25:48one way
25:49or another
25:49if you
25:49could
25:49believe
25:50it.
25:51No,
25:52what got
25:52them in
25:52the end
25:53was futzing
25:53with their
25:54taxes,
25:55not paying
25:55them basically.
25:56Tax evasion?
25:58Yeah.
26:00Tax evasion.
26:04That's
26:05how I
26:06can get
26:07Pinky and
26:07Raquel.
26:08Something
26:09boring,
26:10administrative
26:10and nonetheless
26:11illegal,
26:12good old
26:13fashioned
26:13Al Capone
26:14style tax
26:15evasion.
26:17And I
26:17know they're
26:18guilty of it
26:18because Raquel
26:19always pays
26:19in cash.
26:21Mirabelle,
26:22you're a
26:22genius.
26:24Yeah,
26:24I am.
26:26Alligators
26:26don't sit
26:27there trying
26:27to get
26:27to know
26:28me and
26:28that's
26:28fine
26:29because
26:29the
26:29feeling
26:30is
26:30mutual.
26:32Fascinating.
26:33But what I
26:34asked you
26:35ten minutes
26:36ago is
26:37if you've
26:38ever been
26:38asked to
26:39do something
26:39in your line
26:40of work
26:40of work
26:40that wasn't
26:41how do I
26:42put it
26:43in the
26:44spirit
26:44of the
26:45law.
26:51The
26:52spirit is
26:52willing
26:53but the
26:53flesh is
26:54weak.
26:57And yet
26:58I still feel
26:59you miss
26:59my meaning.
27:00Jed,
27:01I've been
27:02looking for you.
27:02The shrimp fountain's
27:03running low
27:04if you wouldn't mind.
27:04To be continued.
27:06To be continued.
27:12What was that
27:13all about?
27:14What would
27:14Norma do?
27:17The truth is
27:18she'd have
27:19Pinky killed.
27:20That's what
27:21she would do.
27:22Ay,
27:22Dios mio,
27:24Evelyn,
27:24Evelyn,
27:25Evelyn,
27:25Evelyn.
27:25You were not
27:26checking to see
27:27if Jed is
27:28willing to
27:28kill Pinky.
27:30Of course
27:30not.
27:31I may have
27:32been simply
27:32circling the rim
27:33of the bowl
27:34in the general
27:34vicinity of that
27:35kind of thinking
27:35but...
27:35Oh, no,
27:36look at me,
27:36you're not a
27:37killer.
27:38You're not
27:38like that.
27:39How do you
27:39know I'm
27:39not?
27:40I certainly
27:40don't want
27:41to know
27:41that.
27:41Fine,
27:42then I'll
27:42just solve
27:43all our
27:43problems by
27:43myself,
27:44dear husband,
27:44and you
27:44don't have
27:45to know
27:45anything
27:45about
27:45anything.
27:46I'll
27:46do all
27:46the work
27:46and you
27:47can keep
27:47your
27:47pretty
27:47conscience
27:48clean,
27:48just like
27:48Douglas.
27:49That
27:59I need
28:00a huge
28:01favor
28:01from you,
28:01sis.
28:02Sure,
28:03anything.
28:04I need
28:04to let
28:04Evelyn
28:04know
28:05that
28:05Pinky
28:05and
28:05Raquel
28:05have been
28:06cooking
28:06the
28:06books,
28:06but I
28:07can't
28:07have
28:07Virginia
28:07see me
28:08leave,
28:09so I
28:10need you
28:11to pretend
28:11to be
28:11me.
28:12Classic
28:13switcheroo.
28:13Yes.
28:14Okay,
28:14here's the
28:15plan.
28:15I need
28:15you to
28:16wash the
28:17car,
28:17but in
28:18a real
28:18I'm
28:19washing
28:19a car
28:19kind
28:19of way.
28:20I know
28:21how to
28:21do
28:21that.
28:22Great.
28:26Get
28:27to
28:27washing.
28:27Sponges
28:28are in
28:28the
28:30garage.
28:31Sneaky
28:31tunnel
28:31stairway
28:32passage.
28:34God,
28:34I love
28:34this
28:34house.
28:38I
28:39want
28:39to
28:39tell
28:40you
28:40all
28:40a
28:40story
28:41about
28:41a
28:41Harper
28:42Valley
28:42widowed
28:43wife
28:44who
28:47had
28:47a
28:47teenage
28:48daughter
28:49who
28:49attended
28:50Harper
28:50Valley
28:51Junior
28:51High
28:52Well,
28:55her
28:56daughter
28:56came
28:56home
28:57one
28:57afternoon
28:58and didn't
28:58even
28:59stop
28:59to
28:59play
29:00And
29:03she
29:03said
29:03mama
29:04got
29:04a
29:04note
29:05here
29:05from
29:05the
29:05Harper
29:06Valley
29:06PTA
29:07Well,
29:11the note
29:12said
29:12Mrs.
29:12Johnson,
29:13you're
29:13wearing
29:14your
29:14dresses
29:15way
29:15too
29:15high
29:16It's
29:19reported
29:20you've
29:20been
29:20drinking
29:21and
29:21are
29:21running
29:22round
29:22with
29:22men
29:23and
29:23going
29:23wild
29:24And
29:27we
29:27don't
29:28believe
29:28you
29:28ought
29:28to
29:29be
29:29bringing
29:30up
29:30your
29:30little
29:30girl
29:31this
29:31way
29:32And
29:35it
29:35was
29:35signed
29:36by
29:36the
29:36secretary
29:37Harper
29:38Valley
29:38PTA
29:39My
29:41life
29:41is
29:41a
29:41goddamn
29:42mess
29:43Well,
29:44hi,
29:44stranger
29:45I just
29:46can't
29:46take
29:46this
29:47shit
29:47anymore
29:47Pinky
29:49Mitzi
29:49It's a
29:50fucking
29:51Russian mole
29:51in the middle
29:52of Palm
29:52Beach
29:53God,
29:53how did
29:54we get
29:54involved
29:54in such
29:55dangerous
29:56nonsense
29:57mess
29:57Did you
30:07do
30:07something
30:07different
30:07with
30:08your
30:08hair?
30:11Why don't
30:11you come
30:12inside
30:12for a
30:12drink?
30:13You look
30:14like you
30:14could use
30:14one
30:14So I
30:15have
30:16a
30:16plan
30:16It's
30:17a
30:17very
30:19simple
30:19plan
30:20Do you
30:21want to
30:21hear it?
30:23Huh?
30:23Yeah,
30:24of course
30:24I do
30:25We
30:26run away
30:27together
30:27You
30:28and
30:28me
30:28Okay
30:32Tell me
30:33more
30:33No
30:34I
30:34mean it
30:35Max
30:35I can't
30:36keep
30:36stringing
30:36Pinky
30:37along
30:37waiting
30:37for
30:37the
30:38feds
30:38to
30:38find
30:38some
30:39big
30:39Russian
30:40This
30:40isn't
30:40Douglas
30:41We
30:41told you
30:42to
30:42reroute
30:42to
30:42Charlotte
30:43Where
30:43the
30:43hell
30:43are you
30:43going
30:44Why
30:44are you
30:44not
30:44rerouting
30:45to
30:45Charlotte
30:45This
30:45isn't
30:45that
30:46kind
30:46of
30:46pressure
30:46As
30:48your
30:48ex-wife
30:51You
30:56wife
30:56plan
30:57But
30:58Sugar
31:00Can't
31:01tell you
31:02about it
31:02because
31:02we're
31:03divorced
31:04God
31:05I
31:06left
31:06the
31:06woman
31:07that
31:07I
31:07love
31:07A
31:08woman
31:08who
31:08would
31:08protect
31:09me
31:09from
31:09some
31:09homicidal
31:11Cuban
31:11mobster
31:12for
31:12someone
31:13who
31:13bitches
31:14at
31:14me
31:14all
31:14the
31:14time
31:15and
31:15makes
31:15me
31:15feel
31:15like
31:16a
31:16complete
31:16dunderhead
31:17You're
31:20not a
31:20dunderhead
31:21Wow
31:22this is
31:23the good
31:23stuff
31:23It
31:25It's
31:26just
31:26I
31:26know
31:27Marry
31:27Mitzi
31:28Have
31:28the
31:28baby
31:29Get
31:29the
31:29money
31:30Yes
31:32Well
31:34that's
31:34exactly
31:34what
31:35I
31:35was
31:35going
31:35to
31:35say
31:35And
31:37then
31:37maybe
31:38Maybe
31:41then
31:41we
31:41can
31:41get
31:41back
31:41together
31:42We
31:43can
31:43share
31:44some
31:45of
31:45that
31:45money
31:45with
31:46a
31:46long
31:46lost
31:47relative
31:47we
31:47don't
31:47even
31:47know
31:47exists
31:48Someone
31:50who's
31:50a
31:50real
31:50gas
31:51Groovy
31:52chick
31:53You
31:53would
31:54take
31:54me
31:54back
31:54after
31:55everything
31:55that
31:55I've
31:56done
31:56Baby
31:57steps
31:57Douglas
31:58Baby
31:59steps
32:00Cherry
32:01You
32:02Go
32:03back
32:03with
32:03Mitzi
32:03and
32:03let
32:04me
32:05Maxine
32:06Think
32:08later
32:15later
32:15day
32:15for
32:17Douglas
32:17to
32:18a
32:19do
32:19to
32:21here
32:22to
32:23see
32:24the
32:24way
32:25to
32:25go
32:26to
32:26the
32:27house
32:28and
32:29go
32:29to
32:30other
32:31now
32:31to
32:32him
32:32and
32:32him
32:33to
32:33him
32:34to
32:35him
32:36and
32:36him
32:37to
32:38him
32:38Yeah, yeah.
33:08Tom?
33:12Oh, excuse me.
33:13Mr. Diaz.
33:15Can I help you?
33:27I wanted to see you because I needed to say I'm sorry.
33:30I was completely out of line yesterday.
33:34Is it someone's birthday?
33:36Am I interrupting something?
33:38Everyone's celebrating.
33:39A routine traffic stop just netted one of America's most wanted.
33:42Who?
33:44Your prince.
33:46He had broken parole and was on his way out of town.
33:49Lucky break.
33:51And now I've been told to interrogate him.
33:53Is that bad?
33:55With what he knows, he'll either blackmail me or serve me up to my bosses.
33:59Either way, he walks and I'm done.
34:01I'm so sorry.
34:02I was just trying to tell him how important you are to me.
34:07Now he knows.
34:10By the way, he had this in his suitcase.
34:18Yeah.
34:19Nice company you keep.
34:20You're an absolute mastermind.
34:34The IRS is a whole different branch of the government.
34:37If we can get them with this, we don't have to wait for the FBI to build their case.
34:40It's worth a shot.
34:41Yes.
34:42You're sure you want to retry every single pair?
34:45Well, you're the one who said fashion is all.
34:49How are we going to prove tax evasion?
34:52Become CPAs overnight?
34:53We have to find out where they keep their books.
34:56Any records they may have.
34:58Well, that's Pinky.
35:00That's Pinky himself.
35:01He's the bookkeeper.
35:02What?
35:03What time is it?
35:04Oh, uh...
35:05It's 1.30.
35:06Eddie says Pinky always takes his fits between 2 and 3.
35:09That means he's naked.
35:10That means he won't have the ledger.
35:14It's 1970, Grayman.
35:15Gloves are out.
35:23So you two are trying to sell us out to Hoover himself, huh?
35:27You will never learn who I've been working for.
35:30You better watch where you're pointing that thing.
35:32I've been trying to redecorate.
35:35I've finally figured what this place needs.
35:38A spray of Russian red.
35:47Then I got three words for you.
35:49Wah, wah, wah.
35:53What are you?
35:54A baby?
36:02Let's do it sometimes.
36:03A baby?
36:04There's a baby?
36:05There's a baby!
36:06Let's go!
36:07Oh up!
36:08I guess we'll help you.
36:09There's always a jock up.
36:10You look back.
36:11There's always a lonely time.
36:12The poor laughing fooball's on your hands.
36:15And everyone stops when he's done.
36:17Laah!
36:18Let's go!
36:19Please!
36:20When he's done, there's always a funny man in the games, but he's only funny by mistake, but he's got mutate on him just the same, they don't see his lonely hot name, they don't care if there is a shame, just a fool as foolish as he can be.
36:48There's always a joker, that's a rule, but faith is your hand, and I see, the joker is me.
37:18There's always a funny man in the games, but he's only funny by mistake, but there's just one laugh at him just the same, they don't see his lonely hot name.
37:40The joker is me, the joker is me.
38:04The joker is me.
38:23Maxine, wait.
38:24You're not allowed in here.
38:25No, it's okay, Jedabadiah.
38:27This woman from here on in, you treat like a queen.
38:30Let's hit the steam rooms.
38:35Oh, shh, it's Douglas.
38:37Douglas!
38:39You're here?
38:41Yes.
38:42Uh, don't ask me why, but we need you to go into the steam room.
38:49The steam room?
38:50Yes, listen, Pinky's in there, and I need you to keep him in there as long as possible.
38:54Please.
38:56Oh, this is all part of your plan.
38:58Oh.
39:00Yes.
39:02My plan.
39:03Sure.
39:04Okay.
39:05Well, go.
39:06Get, uh, Schwitzen.
39:14Oh.
39:15Just sit in here.
39:19Pinky.
39:20Doug.
39:22Love all the steam, huh?
39:24They say it's good for the privates.
39:27You know, for the purposes of baby making.
39:29Pinky?
39:31Wait, you're not leaving already, are you?
39:35Pinky, a man of your stature,
39:38and an international man of mystery,
39:40a family man on top of all that,
39:44I've been meaning to ask if you have any advice for someone like me.
39:49Hmm.
39:50Of course.
39:53All right, I'll give you that.
39:55Okay.
40:00What, what, what?
40:02There's still two in there.
40:03Wait.
40:05Wait, I know.
40:07Did you call Eddie?
40:08No, no, no, no.
40:09Eddie has made it perfectly clear he doesn't want anything to do with any of my innovations.
40:13Well, you tell Eddie he is involved in this whether he likes it or not.
40:16No, I will not.
40:18Oh.
40:20There is a lesson that I have learned the hard way.
40:22In marriage, you cannot keep things from each other.
40:25Oh.
40:26You, you can't pile secret upon secret.
40:30Because it makes you grow farther and farther apart.
40:33And then,
40:36one day it's, it's normal.
40:38That distance.
40:41The next thing you know, he's, he's having an affair.
40:45Quite well taken.
40:48Well, have you tried using raisins?
40:49I, I never thought of using raisins.
40:51Just try to use it.
40:53Let's go.
40:56It stinks of you.
41:01I'm sorry.
41:02Kimberly, Marco.
41:03Yes.
41:04What was it?
41:05Okay, okay, okay, okay.
41:06Back, back, back, back.
41:07Open it, open it, open it.
41:12Where is it?
41:13Where is it?
41:17It's not here.
41:18Oh, shit.
41:21What have we done?
41:22Just crazy, Dalton, blazy.
41:24Go, go, go, go, go, go, go.
41:25Do you know a mistake that many men make?
41:28Trading in their wives.
41:31That was your mistake.
41:33That is why you are where you are.
41:35I, for one, would never trade in my wife.
41:39I cherish that guy.
41:41A protector.
41:43Loyalty.
41:45At all costs.
41:47You know?
41:49Yeah.
41:55Maxine, we need to talk.
41:57Maxine.
42:06Yes, hello?
42:07Robert, darling.
42:11Norma.
42:13Where are you?
42:15How are you?
42:16I have two questions for you, Robert.
42:19First, why is my beloved home being turned into a tacky nightclub?
42:25Maxine made a deal with Pinky so she could save Douglas.
42:30She had no choice, Norma.
42:31Robert, did you tell Maxine my little secret?
42:35Yes, I'm sorry. I know.
42:37I can forgive you anything, my love.
42:41It's Maxine who is going to pay.
42:47Maxine!
42:49Is there something you want to tell me?
42:52Norma's alive.
42:53Yeah.
42:54So you know Maxine didn't kill her?
42:55Yeah, I've been listening. I traced everything. Norma is in Palm Beach.
42:58Look, we gotta find Maxine. She's in grave danger.
43:02Well, not only Maxine.
43:04I think there's someone else you need to meet.
43:09What is she, multiplying?
43:11Oh, thanks.
43:12Maxine, we are sure happy to have you here. You must be here for afternoon tea.
43:13Oh, thanks.
43:14Maxine, we are sure happy to have you here. You must be here for afternoon tea.
43:17Uh, no. I-I-I actually, I-I just can't-
43:18Now, would you like the caviar service or the pastry tower?
43:19I will have a good time in my wedding.
43:21I don't know why I'm in the future.
43:22Thanks for so much.
43:23I think we're going to have you here for afternoon tea.
43:24We're going to have to go.
43:25I hear you.
43:26We'll have a good time in my wedding.
43:27Yeah, let's go for now.
43:28while I'm in the future.
43:29Have a dark one.
43:30I'll have you here.
43:31I'll have a dark one.
43:32I'll have a dark one.
43:33Maxine, we are sure happy to have you here. You must be here for afternoon tea.
43:36Uh, no. I-I-I-I actually, I-I just can't-
43:37Now, would you like the caviar service or the pastry tower?
43:46The paster tower.
43:58Both.
43:59As you wish.
44:16So, you did it.
44:24Oh.
44:26Hello.
44:29Would you like to join me?
44:30Caviar?
44:32Cream puffs?
44:35God.
44:37I love the way that you love things.
44:42You and I, we make a great team.
44:44And you are an amazing woman.
44:47And I...
44:49I just don't think I have ever seen you look so beautiful.
45:04Douglas.
45:07You are the only man that I will ever love.
45:12Really?
45:14Hmm?
45:16Just said it last night.
45:23Would you...
45:27Want to go somewhere more private?
45:29When the smile is warm, and the kiss is warm, and it warms you through and through, all they want to hearin'
45:43Musica.
45:45The darnedest things are makin'
45:47Musica.
45:49Your happy heart is makin'
45:51Musica.
45:53And should they ask you the meaning there are?
45:57Hmm.
45:58Ha!
45:59Spoons make music, the dish make music, the kettle boiling, the fish make music most.
46:08Anything that you wish make music, the nanny go cools like a dove.
46:15When you're in love, when you're in love.
46:24What are you guys doin' here?
46:25Maxine.
46:26What?
46:27Oh, Maxine, thank God.
46:28It's Norma.
46:29She's in Palm Beach.
46:30Look, we gotta get you to a safe house now.
46:32Oh, no, no, no.
46:33Melissa, well, okay, well, we gotta go to the Delacorte first.
46:35I gotta get Mirabelle.
46:36We were just at the Delacorte.
46:37She's not there.
46:38What?
46:39Mirabelle can't be trusted, Maxine.
46:41Of course she can be trusted.
46:42What are you sayin'?
46:43She's my twin.
46:44Maxine, how was the caviar?
46:46Oh, delicious.
46:48What?
46:51Caviar?
46:54She's here.
46:56Raquel, mi amor!
47:02Raquel!
47:05Raquel!
47:12Mi amor!
47:13Who did this to you?
47:14What?
47:15Yes, you, mi amor.
47:16Yes, you.
47:17Mi amor!
47:18Who did this to you?
47:19Who did this to you?
47:21Who did this to you?
47:22Maxine!
47:23Oh, maldita puta!
47:24Mi rompio la ulla!
47:26Si!
47:28No one does this to me!
47:29No one does this to me!
47:31Winky!
47:32Hey!
47:34I'm sorry, mi amor.
47:36I don't know, mi amor.
47:37You look so beautiful, mi amor.
47:39Oh!
47:40Oh!
47:41Oh!
47:42Oh!
47:43Oh!
47:44Oh!
47:45Oh!
47:46That was really something.
47:47It was...
47:49a little confusing at times, but...
47:51Oh!
47:52Oh!
47:53Oh!
47:55Oh!
47:56You're welcome, stranger.
47:58Oh!
48:02God, I love you.
48:04I am...
48:08so happy...
48:10to hear that.
48:16Okay, well...
48:19I am sure that Mitzi's wondering where I am.
48:21I should...
48:22Okay, bye!
48:23Hey you!
48:37Oh!
48:39Uh...
48:40I see us!
48:41Maribel.
48:58Did you come here to steal my life and money?
49:02Robert told me everything.
49:04He has...
49:05He has a mug shot of you and...
49:06and...
49:07you have a record?
49:08Petty thieving and...
49:09and...
49:10and...
49:11identity theft and...
49:12I haven't always been on the right side of the law.
49:14I think that's been established.
49:21There was no grift.
49:24Oh...
49:25a man...
49:26a...
49:27a...
49:28very...
49:29handsome gay man with muscles in places I didn't know existed...
49:31approached me...
49:32and...
49:33and...
49:34told me I had a sister in Palm Beach...
49:35and...
49:36and that he would pay me to meet her.
49:38All I had to do was get here...
49:39and...
49:40wait for instructions.
49:41But...
49:42but the instructions never came.
49:43I...
49:44I never heard from the man again.
49:45And there I was, lonesome old man in my...
49:47motel...
49:48and I just thought...
49:49I want to find her anyway.
49:55I wanted to find my sister.
49:59Oh...
50:00I got you this.
50:10Panky's leisure?
50:13How did you get this?
50:14I just dusted off my karate chop.
50:17There's something else.
50:23Uh...
50:26You know how you said...
50:27you would only ever love Doug?
50:29Well...
50:30I went the extra mile...
50:32and confirmed...
50:36that he still loves you too.
50:38And he will forever.
50:40And I...
50:42really...
50:46really...
50:48really...
50:49know this.
50:54You didn't...
50:56you didn't sleep with Douglas, did you?
50:59I can't deny that our...
51:01privates...
51:02became...
51:03acquainted.
51:05Oh, gosh.
51:08You're not mad, are you?
51:10Um...
51:12I think this is...
51:13gonna have to be a...
51:15longer conversation.
51:17It's a yes or no question.
51:20I gotta...
51:21uh...
51:22get this to...
51:23someone.
51:24Uh...
51:25Time's of the essence!
51:26What?
51:27Where you going?
51:28I'll just wait here by the pool!
51:37Shit.
51:38Until then...
51:39The Cat's...
51:40The Cat's...
51:41The Cat's...
51:42The Cat's...
51:43The Cat's...
51:44The Cat's...
51:45The Cat's...
51:46The Cat's...
51:47The Cat's...
51:48The Cat's...
51:49The Cat's...
51:50The Cat's...
51:51The Cat's...
51:52The Cat's...
51:53the Cat's...
51:54Oh, how delightful to know!
51:56I'll walk this into your office tomorrow!
51:58Apparently, the IRS is already onto them.
52:02And this little book is just the piece of hard evidence that they need.
52:07They'll be moving against pinky in the next few days. Oh, and then we can run Palm Beach. Just us ladies
52:13night-night pals
52:18Just us ladies
52:20Maybe there's a new side of me one you don't like I
52:26Don't know I hope not come here
52:37I'll see you back at home. I have to finish up here. Yeah
52:54Well, we got to get to the someplace safe. I know of a motel in West Palm Beach
52:58But I think you guys are blowing this whole normal thing out of proportion
53:00We need to be more worried about what Maxine's sister had planned
53:03Okay, wait wait wait look. I don't care who or what she's done
53:11Doesn't feel right leaving her here
53:31Maxine
53:33Oh
53:52This fucking bitch
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