The Kennedys (2015) Season 1 Episode 5

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Transcript

00:00it was my first proper wedding Tim had stayed at our house so didn't see Jenny

00:12he was so drunk he couldn't have seen anyone according to him weddings were

00:17all about superstition luck and traditions I was supposed to feel

00:22pretty lucky about being the bridesmaid but I didn't because I had to wear a

00:26stupid dress a proper flowery girly one but more importantly it was the Jessup

00:33Square North versus Jessup Square South annual grudge match and somehow I had to

00:39play in it

00:50but before anything could happen dad had to get mom and she hated getting up

00:56not the light not the light

00:58you're not a ruddy vampire

01:00I have a long memory don't you Kennedy

01:08take him over the team right there this wedding is on

01:12Tim

01:15come on let's go oh you look lovely and Tim snored all night and made smells that were just wrong dad this is what men do Emma I'm afraid you're just gonna have to make yourself immune to it

01:33Tony today has to be perfect for Jenny perfect but I need you to know that I am

01:40powerless in making that happen powerless he's not wrong it's nerves Tim

01:45got my powers totally I can't even stand Tim you've got both legs in one pyjama leg now calm down and start again and you've got lots of powers listen there's only one man that's gonna make Jenny happy today and that's you

02:00and that's you so come on let's get this wedding rolling

02:04the wedding train was about to leave the station

02:08but I had something more important to do

02:11are you playing I can't yet I've got to go and do the wedding can't you miss the

02:16wedding this is the most important game of our lives I can do both the game

02:21doesn't end until the woman from number 37 shouts at us

02:26we've got ages

02:27Jessup's going north of toast

02:30no it's bad luck to say their name out loud

02:33do you want to end up like Abigail

02:35who's Abigail?

02:36exactly

02:37quick turn around pop spit and say rabbits

02:40rabbits

02:41never pass to Terrence Judy will stop for blackjacks

02:46good luck

02:46come on Jessup's first now

02:51yes

02:52yes Emma

02:53yes Emma

02:55oh look at you

03:02oh you actually look like a girl

03:05although let's be clear a modern girl isn't interested in perpetuating dressing up stereotypes

03:09like I said you do look lovely

03:11is dad not coming?

03:13no he's with Tim

03:15trying to stop him exploding

03:17hey Kim

03:19come on

03:21come on

03:22come on

03:23oh my god what's happened?

03:35Jenny what's wrong?

03:36it's a dress

03:37my mum's got too big

03:39I can't get into it

03:41how can I have the perfect wedding without the dress

03:44oh it's fine it's just a bit stiff

03:47wedding dresses are like getting sofas into rooms

03:51it's all about the angle

03:52we can fix this

03:53come on

03:54arms up

03:58suck in

03:59oh dear

04:01it's not gonna go

04:02it's not gonna go Brenda

04:02Emma

04:03come here

04:04grab that corner

04:05and pull

04:07as hard as you can

04:08are you sure that's a good answer

04:09it's the only way Brenda

04:10on my count

04:12one

04:13two

04:14three

04:14oh

04:15rabbits

04:19what have you done?

04:23you destroyed my wedding dress

04:25but you told me to

04:26I didn't mean it

04:27okay

04:28okay

04:29just shut your eyes from here Jenny in case you go into shock

04:32and you shut them

04:33lie down

04:34and sleep

04:36oh god

04:37what are we gonna do?

04:42are you by some impossible miracle

04:43a trained wedding dressmaker?

04:45I made a hand puppet once

04:47from a sock

04:48a sock's not gonna be big enough

04:50no

04:51wait

04:52we've got curtains

04:55we can go bit raindrops on roses

04:58whiskers on kittens

04:59who doesn't love the sound of music?

05:00nobody

05:01exactly

05:01make it a themed wedding

05:02you can go as a box tied up with string

05:05or a goat

05:05a goat

05:06Brenda

05:06I am getting married

05:09in two hours

05:11and my dress is in pieces

05:13I will not scale

05:15my own wedding in lados

05:17I made a curtains

05:18let's focus on the positives

05:21think of it as an opportunity

05:23a modern adventure

05:24I don't want a modern adventure

05:26I want to get married in a lovely wedding dress like a normal person

05:31this is an opportunity where nothing other than a nervous brain sound

05:36you must stay calm and focus

05:38focus everyone

05:39focus

05:41you could go dress like that

05:45go in in my underwear

05:47go in in my underwear Brenda

05:48shower curtain

05:49there's this

05:51I'm killing myself

05:52goodbye everyone

05:54no no no

05:56no no no

05:57you're not high enough to

05:59you'll sprain your ankle at best

06:01there must be something

06:03we must know someone

06:05think

06:06think a bit more

06:14quickly

06:14I already can't get married in a church

06:19so everything else

06:20has to be perfect

06:22where's the old

06:24the new

06:24the borrowed

06:25and the blue

06:26you're in charge of that

06:27you have got them haven't you

06:28because

06:29that was your one job

06:31the old

06:32the new

06:32the borrowed

06:32and the blue

06:33I didn't think you wanted all that traditional nonsense

06:36I did

06:38I did want all that traditional nonsense

06:42and all the luck that came with them

06:44I want all of it

06:46well

06:47who says

06:49it has to be blue

06:51I've got a

06:54a red rubber in my bag

06:58you can have that

06:58it covers old as well

07:00and borrowed

07:00if I want it back

07:01I don't want your stupid rubber

07:03I want a dress

07:05and I want the old

07:07and I want the new

07:08and I want the borrowed

07:09and I want the blue

07:10and I want all the traditions

07:12and all the superstitions

07:14and I will have the nearest thing

07:16to a perfect wedding

07:18if it kills me Brenda

07:19or you

07:22should I just go and get dad

07:27brilliant Emma

07:28brilliant

07:29this is why you'll definitely get into university

07:31run

07:32run

07:33lassie

07:34and whatever you do

07:35make sure he's as perfect as I am

07:37I was off

07:39dad was now our only hope

07:41but I still needed to keep my eye on the prize

07:43pass it Jane

07:46pass it

07:47pass it

07:47no no no

07:48not to me

07:49have I got mud on my back

07:54a bit

07:55yes

07:57yes

07:58yes

07:59yes

08:00yes

08:01watch out

08:02Tim

08:05relax

08:06just relax

08:07relax

08:09relax

08:11relax mate

08:11that's

08:11relax

08:12there we go

08:13dad

08:13jenny's dress has gone all wrong

08:15what do you mean jenny's dress has gone all wrong

08:18that's bad luck isn't it tony

08:20that's bad luck

08:20oh no

08:21that's not what she meant

08:23just you to wait there

08:27what do you mean jenny's dress has gone all wrong

08:35well

08:35it was in one bit

08:36right

08:37and now it's in two bits

08:38and mum told me to come here and ask you what to do

08:41mrs palmer

08:43she makes costumes for the uncroft players

08:44she might be able to help

08:45here run and ask her

08:46mrs palmer

08:47yeah

08:48gotcha

08:48okay

08:48emma emma

08:49emma

08:50what's happened to your dress

08:51you're covered in mud

08:52has your mother seen it

08:54it's only mud

08:55it's only mud

08:56it's only mud

08:58right

08:59trust me on this

09:00keep your back to everyone at all times

09:02everything's going

09:08really well

09:09yes

09:16come on

09:17yes

09:17come on jenny's dress has gone south we can do this

09:23oh no not again

09:26where's emma

09:40Jenny, let's go!

09:42Do it!

09:51Oh, Tony, have you got wedding dress? Where's Emma?

09:53She's up center to Dee's.

09:55Brilliant idea!

09:57Are you OK?

09:59What's happened to Jenny's dress? Where is it?

10:01It's there, Tony.

10:05You set fire to Jenny's wedding dress.

10:08No, of course I didn't. She did.

10:11Don't ask, you'll win a bit, okay?

10:13Tony! It's all gone ruined!

10:18Don't worry, Jenny. Everything's gonna be fine.

10:21Well, I haven't got the old, the new, the borrowed or the blue.

10:23Is that bad luck, Tony?

10:25Can everyone stop saying everything's bad luck?

10:28It's all just superstitious nonsense.

10:30Bad luck is bad luck, Brenda.

10:32I'm not prepared to take the chance to do something!

10:34Jenny, I am not Glenda, the good witch.

10:37The good witch of the North.

10:39I don't know what I'm supposed to do about the bad luck.

10:42Can't Tony just fix it?

10:44Yes!

10:45Yes!

10:46Tony will fix it. Off you go.

10:48Burrowed. Find it. Find it now.

10:50Hang on. Now, Tony. Burrowed.

10:51And make sure it's the luckiest burrowed you can get your hands on.

10:53Go, go. Off, off.

10:56I've got them, Mum! I've got them!

10:58Oh!

10:59Oh, thank goodness!

11:00You've found a massive wedding dress!

11:02Not quite.

11:03It's from the play we're doing with the Ancroft players.

11:05They won't mind you borrowing it.

11:06Borrowed?

11:07Emma, get back after your father.

11:09Tell him borrowed is done.

11:10Now he has to get blue.

11:11Off, off.

11:12And tell him to make sure it's extra lucky.

11:13Oh, Jenny, the day is saved.

11:16You've got a big white thing from a play.

11:19What a play.

11:20Moby Dick.

11:21It's the best I can do.

11:25It's this or a galleon with four cannons.

11:42You want me to get married dressed as a whale?

11:46It's white, Jenny. That's a star.

11:48It's a whale, Brenda. A whale. A whale with googly eyes.

11:51They're good, aren't they?

11:52I got them from an old pantomime hole.

11:54Hang on.

11:55Isn't Moby Dick supposed to be really unlucky?

11:59No.

12:00Yes, a real portent of evil.

12:01Shush, David!

12:02Oh, that'll shush.

12:03Shush, yes.

12:04No. No.

12:05No, no, Brenda.

12:06Jenny, Jenny, don't be hasty.

12:09It's white, which is traditional.

12:12It'll fit you, which really helps us at the moment.

12:15And Dee will somehow make it look like a dress, won't you, Dee?

12:17I can do my best, make some adjustments.

12:22The tail can make a trin.

12:24I can tuck it here, cut it there.

12:27I can hide the eyes.

12:30Nobody will know, Jenny.

12:32He's got fins.

12:34You could say they're just fashion.

12:36Exactly, Jenny. Who understands fashion, David?

12:39Do you understand fashion?

12:40No, I do not.

12:46You have got just under two hours to make this the best whale-based wedding dress anyone has ever seen.

12:58Do you understand?

13:00Yes.

13:01What's happening?

13:02How's Jenny?

13:03She's fine, Tim.

13:04There's a slight problem with the dress and I've got to find something borrowed, but it's fine.

13:06This isn't my fault.

13:07I should have slaughtered something to appease the wedding gods.

13:08All such a thing as the wedding gods.

13:09Pull yourself together, Tim.

13:10We're going to borrow something.

13:11Now think.

13:12I can't think.

13:13I've got marriage fright.

13:14I'm rigid with it.

13:15You don't need to do borrowed.

13:16Mum says get blue and make it lucky.

13:18I've got a penthouse under the bed.

13:19Sometimes when I show it to Jenny, I get lucky.

13:21It's not that sort of blue, Tim.

13:22Go!

13:23Go!

13:24Go!

13:25Go!

13:26Go!

13:27Go!

13:28Go!

13:29Go!

13:30Go!

13:31Go!

13:32Go!

13:33Go!

13:34Go!

13:35Go!

13:36Go!

13:37Go!

13:38Go!

13:39Go!

13:40Go!

13:41Go!

13:42Go!

13:44Terence!

13:45Come here!

13:46Come here!

13:48Right, give us your sock.

13:50You 코?

13:51Just give us your sock!

13:55What's the score?

13:5612-0 to them.

13:57We really need you.

13:58So the woman from Number 37 hasn't shouted yet?

14:01No, she's gone to Welling Garden City for a pound of kidneys.

14:04We've still got ages.

14:05Good!

14:06Keep it tight in the back four.

14:07I don't know what that means.

14:09No-one does

14:11Here you go.

14:13Thanks.

14:14There you go.

14:15One blue sock.

14:16But is it lucky, Tony?

14:17At least it'll be lucky.

14:18What's that's lucky?

14:19Look at him go.

14:23It'll have to do, won't it?

14:25But we need old, Tony.

14:29What about them?

14:30They're ridiculous.

14:31Come on.

14:32Come on, Emma.

14:38A wet sock.

14:41It smells of mice?

14:45Well, stick it on the radiator, let it dry

14:47and then tie it around your leg like a garter.

14:50It is blue, Jenny. Focus on the positive.

14:53Are you all right, Jenny?

14:55No.

14:56No, I'm not.

14:57Won't somebody, somewhere, help us?

15:00Look at the time.

15:01We've got to start getting everyone in the car.

15:03But, Tony, you haven't got the old and new yet.

15:05Jenny's not going anywhere until you've got those.

15:07And I've only just started.

15:09You two split up.

15:10Tony, get old.

15:11Emma, get new.

15:12Out you go.

15:13Can't you do it?

15:14I'm a little busy with Tim.

15:15I can't abandon my post.

15:16You're going to have to do it.

15:18Jenny needs a horseshoe or something on the ladder of luck.

15:20They're right up there.

15:21Ladder of luck?

15:22Everyone's gone ruddy mad.

15:23I know, but what can we do?

15:25If we want them to get married, you're going to have to get her a horseshoe.

15:27Brenda, we are running out of time.

15:29What do you want me to do?

15:30Take one from the herd of wild ponies that live on Jessop Square?

15:32Oh, no, I can't because there aren't any.

15:35Well, you've got tools in your garage, haven't you?

15:38Yes, I've got tools in your garage.

15:39So make one!

15:40And hurry up.

15:41Right, Tim, you're coming with me.

15:42Good, let's get going.

15:43This way, this way, this way.

15:44Go and find a four-leaf clover.

15:45That's impossible.

15:46Impossible, Emma, no.

15:47Sticky tape in the kitchen cupboard.

15:49You know what to do.

15:51Right, horseshoe done.

15:52That's it.

15:53Emma's doing the news, so that's the superstitions taken care of.

15:55Right, now we can get you married.

15:56You get in the front seat.

15:57The girls will be here in a minute.

15:58Come on, Brenda.

15:59Don't let me down.

16:00I can't travel with Jenny Tony.

16:01I can't see her before the wedding.

16:02That's bad luck.

16:03You're going to have to drive me through the wedding.

16:04I'm going to have to get married.

16:05You get in the front seat.

16:06The girls will be here in a minute.

16:07Come on, Brenda.

16:08Don't let me down.

16:09I can't travel with Jenny Tony.

16:10I can't see her before the wedding.

16:11That's bad luck.

16:12You're going to have to drive me to the registry office and come back.

16:17I've never got time.

16:18We're going to get you there, get you married, and leave within the next 20 minutes.

16:21It's a five minute drive, man.

16:23Come on.

16:24Or we'll be cursed for all eternity.

16:25Chevalier!

16:35Come on, Jessica.

16:36Where's that?

16:42Get her married in a sheet.

16:43It's bad luck to reveal the dress before you get there, Emma.

16:47Emma's just making stuff up now.

16:49Oh, what's that you've found, Emma?

16:51It's a four-leaf clover.

16:54Amazing, amazing find, Emma.

16:57What luck, Jenny.

16:59Is that a fake?

17:01No.

17:02A fake?

17:03A fake.

17:04Just stick it underneath your thigh so I can never mention it again.

17:10Emma Kennedy!

17:12Look at your dress!

17:14Brenda, she is covered in mud!

17:20I have got a regular clover with one leaf stuck on it.

17:26My garter is made from a slightly damp sock and my bridesmaid is filthy!

17:33My wedding is a disaster.

17:36If you want more luck, Jenny, I'll get you more luck.

17:38There you go.

17:39Now, she's a chimney sweep.

17:40Rich Jenny is the best luck ever.

17:41Jenny, you are beautiful.

17:42You've got life in your belly and love in your heart.

17:47If that's not all the luck you need, and I don't know what, you could walk up that aisle dressed as a camel on a Wednesday and we still all think you were the most beautiful, luckiest bride we'd ever seen.

18:02Who needs the same old things everyone else has?

18:03Who needs the same old things everyone else has?

18:04Make your own traditions.

18:05Your own luck.

18:06Is anyone else getting married today with a boys climbing football sock tied to their thigh?

18:09And what does that make you?

18:10You certainly don't.

18:11You're neatly lucky.

18:12That's what.

18:13So stand tall.

18:14Oh yes, stand tall.

18:15I forgot to tell you that.

18:16That bit's important.

18:17Don't bend down.

18:18Here's turning.

18:19I said it Jenny.

18:20You're off to the registry office.

18:21Oh, I forgot to tell you that.

18:22That bit's important.

18:31Don't bend down.

18:32Here's turning.

18:33I said it Jenny.

18:34We're off to the registry office.

18:37Oh yes, stand tall.

18:39I forgot to tell you that.

18:40That bit's important.

18:42Don't bend down.

18:43Here's turning.

18:44I said it Jenny.

18:45There's no way for the registry office.

18:48Have you got everything?

18:56Rings, speech, six sacks for the car.

19:00Right, everybody get in, I won't be a minute.

19:02And I don't know if I'm being a fool, don't know if I'm...

19:16Close, close, everybody come close.

19:19Oh, wow.

19:21Okay, come on.

19:23Love is in the air, in the whistler of the trees.

19:32Love is in the air, in the thunder of the sea.

19:37Whoo! Whoo! Whoo!

19:40You've got ten minutes to get them married.

19:43I'm telling you, Jenny, we have pulled this off.

19:46You've done wonders, Dee, wonders. This is it.

19:49You're getting married!

19:53Oh!

19:58You've done a great job, Dee.

20:00I am Ismail.

20:02Hope nobody's brought a harpoon.

20:09You know what you are.

20:11Cutting-edge fashion.

20:14Good to talk of the town, Jenny.

20:16Oh, I expect we'll be talking about this for years to come, Brenda.

20:21Years.

20:22Come on, Brenda. There's another wedding after this.

20:24Okay, David and Dee, get in there and see your heart sound.

20:27Emma, pick up her tail.

20:30I mean, train.

20:31Tony, take her up that aisle and let's get married!

20:34Ah!

20:38Despite forgetting to do the only job she'd been given,

20:41Mum had gotten away with it.

20:42She was utterly triumphant.

20:43It's coming.

20:44Registration is coming.

20:45We've done it.

20:46We know weddings.

20:47We've never done it.

20:48You're beautiful, Jenny.

20:49Tim's a lucky man.

20:50Ready?

20:51Ready.

20:52Ready.

20:53Congratulations.

20:54And celebrations.

20:55When I tell everyone that you're in love with me.

20:56Congratulations and jubilations.

20:57I want the world to know when I tell everyone that you're in love with me.

20:58Congratulations and jubilations.

20:59I want the world to know how happy I can be.

21:00Tell her away, Jenny.

21:01I also have the first time to give presents.

21:02Let's do it.

21:03Ok, Jenny.

21:04Emily, Danny.

21:05Thank you, Jenny.

21:06Tim's a lucky man.

21:08Ready?

21:09Ready.

21:10Ready?

21:11Ready?

21:12Ready?

21:13Congratulations and celebrations.

21:15WHEN I TELL EVERYONE THAT YOU'RE IN LOVE WITH ME

21:22CONGRATULATIONS AND JUBILATIONS

21:25I WANT THE WORLD TO KNOW HOW HAPPY I CAN BE

21:29She's all yours, mate. Thanks.

21:33Hi, Jenny. Thanks for coming. You look lovely.

21:38Is she dressed as a whale?

21:40Er, yes. I think she is, yes.

21:42Thank you, thank you, thank you.

21:46Looking at the bride and groom today,

21:49I am reminded that embarking on marriage

21:52is like embarking on a long voyage across uncharted seas.

21:57That's dead.

22:00Or to use another analogy, marriage is a circle of love.

22:06Today, you will exchange vows

22:09which will unite you as man and whale.

22:14I mean, wife.

22:16And now, the best man will read a poem of the couple's choosing.

22:19Mary had a little lamb whose fleece was white as snow.

22:25And everywhere that Mary went...

22:28I don't know anyone called Mary.

22:29The lamb was sure to go.

22:30Thanks, mate. It was really moving.

22:31I lost the reading.

22:32What?

22:33I lost the...

22:34What?

22:35I lost the...

22:36What?

22:37So, a man hears a knock at his back door.

22:38He opens it, he looks down, there's a snail there.

22:40Bends down, he picks up the snail and he chucks it.

22:42As far as he can.

22:43Four years later, there's another knock on the door.

22:45He opens it, and the snail's there.

22:46The snail looks up.

22:47I don't know anyone called Mary.

22:48I don't know anyone called Mary.

22:49I don't know anyone called Mary.

22:50The lamb was sure to go.

22:51Thanks, mate.

22:52It was really moving.

22:53I lost the reading.

22:54I lost it.

22:55I lost it.

23:00So, a man hears a knock at his back door.

23:02He opens it, he looks down, there's a snail there.

23:04Bends down, he picks up the snail, and he chucks it.

23:07As far as he can.

23:08Four years later, there's another knock on the door.

23:11He opens it, and the snail's there.

23:13The snail looks up, and he says,

23:16What do you do that for?

23:21I get that.

23:22No, it's all, Steve.

23:24I'll take it from here, though.

23:29I had a speech written out,

23:31but I had an emergency last night in the loos at Curry Paradise.

23:35Leave it, burn it, that's gone now.

23:41Who needs speeches?

23:43I am just a man standing with his woman.

23:48Me, Tarzan, she, Jane.

23:51Oh!

23:53Hey!

23:57Jenny.

24:02Beautiful, sweet Jenny.

24:05You smell really nice.

24:07You have other attributes as well, but that's your best one.

24:12Oh.

24:13You're going to be a brilliant mum.

24:16And I'm really, really, really looking forward to having sex with you again.

24:22I am a lucky, lucky man to have you.

24:24And even better, we're having a baby, which you will look after.

24:31I have Tony and Brenda.

24:34The best friends anyone could ask for.

24:37And Dee and David, who I also know.

24:41You and Emma, who is a girl.

24:50I am.

24:52Life's pretty all right.

24:54Now let's get married.

25:00Then it gives me great pleasure to tell you that you are now husband and wife.

25:04and wife.

25:24Oh, my God!

25:25Blowhole!

25:34I couldn't take it out!

25:42I've learned that luck was something you made happen yourself.

25:45And I still have my own promise to keep.

25:49Right, let's get this done.

25:52Don't stop me. Don't stop me. Don't stop me.

25:55Don't stop me. Don't stop me.

25:57Then crikey, you're here.

25:58It's all square, 31 all.

26:01Don't stop me. Don't stop me.

26:03Oooooohhh!

26:04Hey, you lot, pack it in!

26:26We won!

26:27We won!

26:28Yes!

26:29Yes!

26:30Yes!

26:31Come on!

26:32Come on!

26:33I knew you were lucky!

26:35I knew it!

26:36Yes!

26:37Yes!

26:38Woohoo!

26:39We did it, Jess, for ourselves!

26:40We did it!

26:41Yes!

26:42She ain't got the funny, her clothes are kind of funny, her hair is kind of wild and free.

26:50Oh, for the love rose to where my rosary goes, and nobody knows like me.

27:00She talks kind of lazy, and people say she's crazy, and her life's a mystery.

27:07Oh, for the love rose to where my rosary goes.

27:13I'm for you.

27:14I'm for you.

27:15What is your dream?

27:16I'm for you.

27:17We're going to come for the love of Rome, where we get the bush, like that, where the

27:18곡, the history of Rome and the world.

27:20Of course, it's true.

27:21It's a true way that we read them from Rome.

27:22It's a true way, too, and that's true.

27:23I'm not afraid to do that.

27:24I'm not afraid to do that.

27:25I'm not afraid to lie.

27:26You're not afraid to lie.

27:27No doubt.

27:28That's true.

27:29It's just the truth.

27:30I'm afraid to be lying about her.

27:31You're not afraid to lie.

27:32I'm afraid to be lying about God.

27:33Any time to lie.

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