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The Wrath of Khan is arguably the greatest Star Trek movie, but it's far from perfect.
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00:00Not too many people would argue with me when I say that The Wrath of Khan is the best Star
00:05Trek movie ever, but it's imperfect in the way that most human endeavors are.
00:10This is unsurprising, given that when director Nicholas Meyer was offered the film, there
00:15was shades of the motion picture, but no workable script.
00:19In fact, three different scripts had been developed, The Omega System, The Genesis Project,
00:25and The New Star Trek. So Meyer and the producer identified all the bits they liked from the
00:30scripts, and Meyer wrote his first draft of a new script in just under two weeks, titled
00:35The Undiscovered Country. Well, actually, they retitled it to The Vengeance of Khan,
00:41but then they retitled it again to The Wrath of Khan before release, so they really couldn't
00:46make up their minds. Many, many revisions followed, but time was wasting and money was tight.
00:51The script and the resulting film were of astounding quality for such a time crunch project,
00:57but in that hurry, a fair amount of dumb things did slip through the cracks. So with all that
01:03history in mind, and with our love of this film firmly established, let's have a bit of fun while
01:08we look at the 10 dumbest things that happened in Star Trek Wrath of Khan.
01:13Number 10. Reliance Weak Password. The prefix code is a good idea for thwarting a hostile takeover
01:19of a starship, but a code of only five numbers is in the range of your upper-end bicycle combination
01:25lock, 90,000 possible combinations. Have you ever looked at that bank of switches Spock
01:31flips to input the code? There are only 10 switches, one per number from 1 to 9 and 0,
01:37and each switch stays flipped after he uses it. Thus, each number can only be used once per code.
01:43This means no prefix numbers like 16303 or 01701, let alone 66666. This cuts down on the possible
01:54combinations by two thirds to just 27,216. Most Wi-Fi passwords are harder to crack. Also,
02:03after Khan has been prefix coded and handed his ass, it's surprising that Mr. Superior Intellect
02:09doesn't figure out that this is what happened and try to locate the Enterprise's own prefix code
02:14in order to turn the tables on his old friend, Kirk. But that would have meant showing Khan is
02:20actually intelligent, not just telling us. Number 9. Cadet dead meat to the bridge.
02:26With the Enterprise's bridge at the very tippy top of the ship's saucer, and with engineering in the
02:31cigar-shaped engineering secondary hall, there is no way that the bridge is en route to sickbay.
02:37So why then does the turbolift bring Scotty carrying the mortally wounded cadet Peter Preston
02:42to the bridge? Ever since the movie opened, fans have either been crying in outrage over this,
02:47or offering rationalizations and justifications for it. The damage caused the turbolifts to
02:53malfunction. Uh, Scotty was so grief-stricken that he blah blah blah. Logically, they could have had
03:00Kirk step out of the turbolift on his way to sickbay and find Scotty with Preston in a line of wounded
03:05trying to get into sickbay. But then the audience might have been anticipating such a sight en route
03:11to McCoy, whereas the doors opening to this horror was indeed a shock. So, that's the reality. It's
03:18only there for a punch-in-the-gut dramatic effect, even though it makes zero sense. Shocking? Yeah,
03:24absolutely. Dumb? Definitely. Number 8. Kirk and Bones both blow it.
03:29The film's story forces Kirk to catch the idiot ball in order to show him as old and worn out and in
03:35desperate need to get his mojo back, which we can accept to a point, but it does go overboard in this
03:41regard and does Bones dirty in the process. Upon discovering Torell and Chekhov on the regular one
03:47space station, Chekhov emotes. Chekhov. Oh, sir. It was Khan. We found him on Seti Alpha 5. He put
03:54creatures in our bodies to control our minds. McCoy. It's all right. You're safe now. Chekhov.
04:00They made us say lies, do things, but we beat him. We thought he controlled us, but he did not. The
04:07captain was strong. Wait a Vulcan minute, Lieutenant Commander. Bad accent. And yeah, I'm also talking
04:12about me because what fun would this be if we didn't do some light teasing? But anyway, Chekhov just
04:18explicitly told them. The titular space genius had put creatures in their bodies to control their
04:24minds. And what is the first reaction to this bombshell? Bones effectively says, it's all good.
04:29What? The instant Chekhov admits this, both Kirk and Bones ought to have suspected Khan was behind
04:34every word coming out of the Reliant Boys' mouths. Sure, Kirk is focused on the Genesis material,
04:40and finding Dr. Marcus, but he's beyond thick here. And Bones? What excuse does he have?
04:47What sort of doctor hears two potential patients say they had foreign creatures placed inside their
04:52bodies to control them and doesn't immediately ask how and where and examine the living crap out of
04:59them? Kirk's not the one caught with his britches down. McCoy is tripping over the metaphorical pants
05:05around his ankles. Number seven, the inferior superior intellect. Khan, Admiral Kirk, never bothered to
05:14check on our progress. It is only the fact of my genetically engineered intellect that allowed us to
05:20survive. Much is made of Khan's intellect in the film, but he's dumb as a box of rocks throughout,
05:26let's be honest. Consider the following. Khan wants Genesis, yet tortures and kills the
05:31uncooperative Genesis team instead of sticking eels in them, or instead of taking any of the team with
05:37him when he has to leave regular one in order to blow Kirk to bits. I mean, yeah, I get he's mad,
05:43but come on, he's a super genius. Next, Mr. Superior Intellect can't spot the most in plain sight code
05:50ever. Spock says, hours would seem like days, and then explains the ship's status using days.
05:57Twelve-year-olds in the audience could decode that on the fly, so why can't Khan or his crew of fellow
06:04superhuman, or Savik for that matter? Yes, Khan has activated his Ahab obsession power-up, and he's
06:11phaser-focused on harpooning his white whale Kirk. And granted, his monumental ego and sense of innate
06:17superiority cloud his judgment to the point where he's easily duped and goaded into chasing Kirk into a
06:23nebula where he loses most of his advantage. But like Kirk and Bones, he gets tossed the idiot ball
06:30and never once demonstrates any real smarts. This was not always the case. In one of the scripts from
06:36which the final film screenplay was built, and before his beloved wife was fridged, there was a
06:41dialogue that indicated Khan was indeed an extra special super genius. Khan, how are system controls
06:48working? MacGyver's. Very well, command and remote functions are all tied through computer stations.
06:53How could you have designed it so quickly? Khan, this is a sister ship of the Enterprise. The
06:59Enterprise's manuals I absorbed 14 years ago are still fresh in my mind. Not only would such a dialogue
07:06have demonstrated that Khan's an actual smarty pants, ergo a real threat, it would have made clear
07:12how 14 supermen could have run an entire spaceship, especially with 10 of them on the bridge.
07:17Number 6. Wiley Chekhov. In old cartoons, characters would frequently run the same path
07:24of a steamroller about to flatten them, or stand by dumbly before getting clobbered by a car or
07:29flattened by a boulder. Chekhov effectively does this on SETI Alpha 5 upon seeing the belt buckle.
07:36Chekhov. Botany Bay. Botany Bay? Oh no, we've got to get out of here now. Damn! He knows what this
07:43means, but instead of doing the logical thing, putting his helmet on and calling for extraction,
07:48assuming he even needs a helmet to do this, he and Terrell put on their helmets, step outside,
07:53and at the sight of the 14 survivors, freeze like a bug-eyed wily coyote watching as a train bears down
07:59on him. By rights, Chekhov should have tried calling the ship before stepping outside. You don't stop to
08:05explain when you realize you're standing over a live grenade. You run, duck, or throw yourself on
08:10it. And even if, for some plot-convenient reason, the comm didn't work inside the cargo containers,
08:16Chekhov should have been screaming for a beam-out throughout their exit from the hatch,
08:20and even as Khan's people moved towards them. But from the lack of alarm exhibited by Beach and Kyle
08:25on the Reliant, it's obvious no communication of any sort was received. One can excuse Chekhov's
08:31behavior after he gets an eel in the ear, but not his costly ineptitude at this stage in the story.
08:37It's no wonder he never made Captain.
08:40Number 5. Universal Armageddon. But no rush. As David Marcus frets, as the Genesis proposal
08:46demonstrates, and as Spock and Bones' argument makes clear, the Genesis device has the potential
08:52to be a dreadful weapon if used where life already exists. We're talking about Universal Armageddon,
08:59Bones exclaims. In short, Genesis is a Manhattan project, and Kirk clearly knows what it is before
09:06revealing it to his confidants. So why is it then that everyone's so damn blasé about Carol's cry
09:12for help? Consider this. Carol calls Kirk to ask if he gave the order, and states that someone is going
09:19to take Genesis without proper authorization. Mid-conversation, her transmission is jammed at the
09:24source. This isn't garbled communications. It's deliberate. Kirk calls Starfleet Command to try and
09:30get to the bottom of things. And when he clearly doesn't get an answer to what's going on, instead
09:35of, you know, immediately calling to the bridge and ordering maximum warp to regular one, he meanders
09:41to Spock's quarters for a friendly chat, and then finally goes up to the bridge to order Sulu to go to
09:47warp five. Warp f***ing five. Yes, it's a minor continuity point, but in the previous film, the
09:54Enterprise zipped along to meet V'ger at warp seven without even breaking a sweat. Warp five is like a
09:59police car driving below the speed limit while rushing to an active crime scene. Kirk ought to have been
10:05court-martialed for that. I mean, come on, take things seriously, Admiral. As scripted, this would have been a
10:11better scene, as Kirk would have gone to the bridge prior to him going to see Spock. This was, however,
10:17swapped around in editing for dramatic effect, but at the cost of making Kirk appear to be not taking
10:22this whole thing as seriously as he really should. Number four, exit the eel. The influence of the
10:29baby eels is pretty shaky. How is it that Terrell and Chekhov can sit by as their shipmates, Reliance
10:35crew, are marooned on Khan's barren sand heap? Yet, later in the movie, Terrell manages to resist when
10:42Khan instructs him to shoot Kirk, a man he says he'd never met. Is Kirk really just that awesome? Eh,
10:50rank does have its privileges, I guess. Or, is actively murdering someone just too much for even
10:56eel influence? Mmm, no, not really, as he vaporizes an innocent civilian just moments earlier. And,
11:03after Terrell phasers himself out of the narrative rather than Kirk, why is it that the eel and Chekhov's
11:09noggin chooses that precise moment to get the heck out of there? You could maybe argue semantics about
11:16what happened to its friend, but it's a little convenient, isn't it? However, for the past 40
11:22years, fans have joked that there's another reason the beast fled. It was starving to death as Chekhov
11:27is brainless. Number three, Kirk's unfair tactical advantage. Show, don't tell is a truism in film and
11:35video. And, while it's not always necessary to cross every T or dot every I, sometimes a film
11:41really ought to just make a tiny bit of effort to make clear how something improbable happens to
11:46happen. Case in point, when the Enterprise first arrives at Regula I. Spock, Regula is a Class D.
11:54It consists of various unremarkable ores. Essentially, a great rock in space. Kirk,
12:00Reliant could be hiding behind that rock. Spock, a distinct possibility. Then, in a classic case of
12:08technology doing whatever the plot requires at any given moment, when Kirk returns to the ship from
12:13the Genesis cave, he orders tactical and immediately a computer graphic shows him exactly where the
12:18Reliant is, orbiting opposite them, presumably having just left the Regula I station where we saw her
12:25seconds earlier. Now, how come they couldn't do that before? And how can they track her through an
12:30entire planetoid now? And why does it only work one way? Why isn't Khan all, there she is, at the
12:38same instant Kirk spots where the Reliant is? And just how long has the Enterprise crew known where
12:44Reliant is? Is this how she's managed to stay out of sight? If you can't tell, I have a lot of
12:50questions. One can speculate or manufacture all sorts of rationalizations for this, like how the
12:56Enterprise was receiving telemetry from Regula I that Khan didn't know how to access. But then it
13:01gives Kirk an easy advantage instead of showing him using his smarts or his experience as a starship
13:06captain. Taking obstacles away from the protagonist diminishes his efforts. It could easily have been
13:12addressed by simply mentioning sensor damage earlier in the damage report, or by having Regula I
13:18telemetry appear on the tactical display. But alas, they didn't. Number two, damn peculiar.
13:25Starfleet surely knows that the Reliant is assigned to Project Genesis. So when Kirk calls them
13:31concerning Carol's cry for help, the very first order of business should have been to call the Reliant
13:36and ask what's going on or if they know anything about it. Nothing in the film suggests that a call
13:42like this happened, or if it did, that Starfleet ever got back to Kirk about whether they could or
13:47couldn't get through. And furthermore, despite being told they are, as usual, the only ship in the
13:53quadrant, they spot the Reliant assigned to Genesis not only in their quadrant, but closing fast.
14:00As soon as Kirk comms the bridge, he's ordering to try the emergency channels, so something is already
14:05odd. The moment Spock deduces there's something weird about Reliant's excuse about their
14:10Chambers coil is overloading their comms systems. That ought to have been the last straw, but it wasn't.
14:17Now, from Carol's message earlier, Kirk knows that A, someone is trying to take Genesis,
14:23B, that Carol believes it's someone from Starfleet, as she said, did you give that order?
14:29And C, her transmission gets jammed at the source. So when the Reliant shows up acting damn peculiar,
14:35even too long out of pasture, Kirk should have been able to put two and two together and acted with
14:40due caution. Yeah, I know the point of Wrath of Khan is that Kirk is rusty, but given everything
14:47leading up to the moment of the ambush, his hesitation and inaction serves to not merely portray
14:52Kirk as out of practice, but as an incompetent fool, responsible for the loss of Genesis and the
14:58Enterprise damage and casualties, that's almost dumb enough to warrant being drummed out of the
15:03service. Number one, the Genesis defect. Even taking the movie on its own terms, that the Genesis
15:11planet even exists at the end is beyond absurd. The narrative makes it abundantly clear that the
15:17Genesis device is inside the Reliant, which is itself within the Matara Nebula, and somehow the
15:22Genesis wave not only kind of matter, complete with all sorts of plant DNA, but all of this
15:28conveniently falls together into a sphere in a matter of minutes. The icing on the cake though,
15:33is that this preposterous planet just so happened to have formed within the Goldilocks zone of a star.
15:39A star, wait, where did that star come from? Was it the one Regula orbits, or did Genesis
15:46manufacture a star too? And how does that miracle planet just happen to have exactly the right angular
15:52momentum to go into orbit around that wherever it's from star? Ugh, and some fans complain
15:58that the red matter in Star Trek 2009 was dumb. But play by your own rules, movie.
16:03And those were the 10 dumbest things in Star Trek II, The Wrath of Khan.
16:07Do you think we missed something? Well, check out the article on our website, because there's four additional
16:12dumb things listed there. Oh, and before I get any pitchforks in the comments, this is genuinely my favorite
16:18Star Trek movie, and I've watched it way more times than I can count. But there's just something fun about
16:25taking a look at the media that we love, and just tearing it apart. If you liked this video, go ahead and
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