Family Guy - Season 23 Episode 17 Karenheit 451
#EnglishMovie #cdrama #drama #engsub #chinesedramaengsub #movieshortfull
#EnglishMovie #cdrama #drama #engsub #chinesedramaengsub #movieshortfull
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00:00There's violence in movies and sex on TV
00:03But where are those good old-fashioned values
00:07On which we used to rely?
00:10Lucky is a family guy
00:13Lucky is a man who finds a human hand
00:16All the things that make us laugh and cry
00:20He's a family guy!
00:30Hey, Brian, could you read Stewie his bedtime story tonight?
00:34I'm watching the Hot Ones episode where the wings fell on the floor
00:37Jesse Plemons ate one with lint on it
00:40Hey, when life gives you Plemons
00:42Yes? And?
00:45I thought the beginning was clever enough to carry the day
00:51Would have preferred a claw retraction on that tuck-in, but you're new at this
00:55Okay, tonight I'm gonna read you Charlie and the Chocolate Factory
00:59It was my favorite book when I was a kid
01:01Pup
01:02Pup means dog kid
01:03Fine, since I was a pup
01:05Correct
01:06Mr. and Mrs. Bucket have a small boy named Charlie
01:09Who, by the way, is trans, not that it matters
01:12He slash his grandparents all sleep on the same cruelty-free mattress
01:16Because they are otherwise unhoused
01:18What the hell?
01:19Where's the Chalamet, Bri? Get to the Chalamet
01:21The Gobstoppers are vegan?
01:23After falling in the Chocolate River, Augustus Gloop apologizes for doing blackface?
01:28Why did they change all this stuff?
01:30My God, this is the worst day since 9-11
01:33Hey guys, we're out of dry food
01:35Brian, they just knocked down the World Trade Centers
01:38Oh
01:39Did they also knock down the Petco?
01:46Hey, you guys heard about this Hamilton thing?
01:49The iconic musical that sold out theaters across the globe? Yeah, we've heard about it
01:53It's the Founding Fathers
01:55But they rap
01:56Officer Swanson, there's an illegal underage social function on Sycamore that's violating Ordinance 313
02:03Please respond
02:04I thought this was your day off, Joe
02:06Why they calling you?
02:07Tonight's the night my chief has everyone from the squad over to his house for dinner
02:11How come you aren't there?
02:12It's like designated survivor
02:14Of all the cops on the force, the chief asked me not to come
02:18That's how critical I am
02:20That's sad
02:21I'm sad now
02:22Sorry, I gotta go handle this
02:24You guys are welcome to ride along with me and I could drop you off after
02:27Sounds great
02:33Someone changed this classic kids book to make it all woke
02:36Who would do something like this?
02:38Probably someone who cares about their children
02:40Add Smug Smile now
02:43Lois, did you have something to do with this?
02:45I sure did
02:46This was the local chapter of my bored suburban mom group
02:49It's called Mothers Invested in Literary Fixin'
02:52Nilf?
02:54So you're ruining books just because you and your weak-minded friends
02:57Can't handle reading them as the authors intended?
02:59Oh, come on, it's just a few little changes to make the books nicer
03:03When did nice become a bad thing?
03:05Kids like Stewie a little and helpless and her innocence needs to be protected
03:09Hey, could you do me a favor and not cut my sack off in front of Rupert?
03:12I'm trying to get in dem cheeks tonight
03:14What you're doing is offensive to me as an author
03:17Self-published author
03:18Well, too bad cause we're just getting started
03:21At tomorrow's school board meeting
03:23We'll push to replace other problematic books with versions we approve of
03:27Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to get back to stuffing envelopes
03:30With these stamps featuring female heroes no one's ever heard of
03:33Mary Lyon, founded Mount Holyoke College
03:36Hero
03:38Harriet Quimby, first female pilot to fly the English Channel
03:42Hero
03:43Hazel Hotchkiss Whiteman, honorary commander of the order of the British Empire
03:48Hero
03:49Mary Lyon, founded Mount Holyoke
03:51Oh my god, they just repeat there's only three of them
03:58Hmm, this appears to be a shindig of the high school variety
04:02Why do you always talk so doofy?
04:04Language is my mistress, and I like to try new positions
04:07Alright, I gotta go break this up
04:14Wait, let's not break it up
04:16Let's wake it up
04:18Well, I guess this is a body cam cheat day
04:21You're all under arrest
04:23For not partying hard enough
04:25Yeah
04:30Go ahead, pick another city
04:32Coral Gables
04:33Three to the three to the one four six
04:36Whoa, yeah, cool
04:38When it comes to zip codes, I am that dude
04:44Cannonball
04:56Yeah
05:01Oh god, that's Stacy, she can't see me here
05:03Glen, there shouldn't be anyone at this party who can't see you
05:06Guys, they have BritBox
05:08Who is ready for an eight-part murder mystery that absolutely shatters the coastal community of Brighton?
05:18Let's turn this party up a notch
05:25I drank way too much last night
05:44Why are we wearing tuxedos?
05:47Uh-oh, apparently we got married last night
05:50It's all over TikTok
05:51Hahahaha
05:57Boy, my dad doesn't look happy
05:59But God bless him, he gave us a Cuisinard
06:02You picked R. Kelly for our first dance?
06:04I know it's wrong
06:05But the grooves are too strong
06:07Guys, we have to fix this
06:08Marrying each other was a huge mistake
06:12It was?
06:18Welcome to tonight's town hall
06:19Now, let's open up the floor to women with little chin hairs when the light hits it just right.
06:25Hello, parents and concerned citizens.
06:28There we go.
06:30Turn them off!
06:31Aw.
06:32We are MILF, and we're very worried about the outdated messages in the books you're giving our kids.
06:38Why does James's peach need to be giant, huh?
06:41It's big-pitted, and we should celebrate its curves.
06:45All y'all husbands follow my Instagram.
06:49This is nuts. Changing books is wrong. If you don't like it, just don't read it.
06:53Look, I'll be honest. Whoever is angriest is going to win, so have at it.
06:58Come on!
07:00It's pretty close.
07:02But since it's 2025, I'm going to go with a group of ethnically diverse women.
07:19Thank God we're doing this divorce before Donna finds out.
07:29What's this about you getting a piece of my pension?
07:31I offered you a prenup. You declined.
07:33Let's just get this over with, Peter.
07:35But the Christmas cards already went out!
07:37Oh, my goodness. We really do come in all shapes and sizes.
07:47Now that we got that out of the way, let's pound some brews!
07:50We got married again.
07:56I can't believe it! Why does this keep happening to us?
07:58Guys, don't you see? It's the alcohol.
08:01Every time we drink, we end up doing something stupid.
08:04I'm afraid that dark day has finally come.
08:07We need to stop drinking.
08:09And we need to settle up for the hotel. Let's see here.
08:11Cleveland and Quagmire. Champagne and strawberries.
08:15Intimacy kit.
08:16In a movie that's just titled Movie.
08:19It was Frost Nixon. Ain't everything sexual.
08:22Actually, it was Frosting Nixon, and it was very sexual.
08:25Hmm. They've yet to find the title they can't corrupt.
08:35I can't believe we have to stop drinking! This is a nightmare!
08:39Look, I don't like this any more than you do, but Peter's right.
08:41Either we cork the hooch or end up marrying each other every day.
08:45Fine. But just know that even though we're breaking up,
08:48I will still slap anyone who disrespects you at the Oscars.
08:52What did you want to talk to us about, Peter?
08:59I've decided to give up alcohol.
09:02Well, I'm proud of you. This is gonna change your life. Ours, too.
09:06Way to go, Dad!
09:07Thanks, gang. But just so you know, I'm now replacing all my alcohol energy with Grand Canyon energy.
09:13What's that?
09:14Just endless enthusiasm about the Grand Canyon.
09:17Did you know the most dangerous animal in the GC is actually the rock squirrel?
09:21That's true. I'm looking at your faces, but that's actually true.
09:24Welcome to Kettlebells with Stu.
09:29We're all warriors here. Kettlebell warriors.
09:32See that over there? That's the road.
09:34If any of you want to waste my time, you may as well hit it right now.
09:39All right, warriors, we'll pick this up next week.
09:41I shouldn't have advertised on Facebook. It's all pigs.
09:44And they want to change the books you read because they think you can't handle it.
09:49So I've invited a guest to speak with you about the dangers of sanitizing books.
09:53Quahog's own beloved children's book author, Mr. Hillman Hollister.
09:57Good afternoon, everyone.
09:59I hope you're ready to hear the word the in front of a lot of different ethnicities.
10:03Thank you for coming, Mr. Hollister. We're gonna take a little break.
10:06Be sure to give your email to one of the guys with the clipboard so we can flood your inbox for the rest of your life.
10:10Hey, Brian. I'm a news producer, and our team loves how outspoken you've been about literary freedom.
10:16We think our viewers would really appreciate your point of view.
10:19Really?
10:20Absolutely. Call me.
10:24That guy you were talking to just ran over a group of protesters when he drove off.
10:37Peter?
10:39Hey, sleepyhead.
10:40Why are you up so early? Is that fresh-brewed coffee I smell?
10:45It sure is. Also, I prepared your tampon for the day.
10:51Wow. Gross. Thanks.
10:54Crap. I have to get the kids ready for school.
10:56Relax. I took care of it. They are out of bed and fed.
11:00Great. Thank you. Not Pop-Tarts, though.
11:03They are out of bed and fed.
11:05I gotta tell you, Peter, sobriety is looking good on you, and your liver must be thrilled.
11:10Hey, HR sent me to tell you that you can finally use all that vacation time you've accrued.
11:16Awesome. There's a state I've really been wanting to visit.
11:19Which one?
11:20Oregon.
11:22It's a liver. We'll be right back.
11:25How are we feeling today, boys?
11:30Rested and vested.
11:32Killing it without swilling it.
11:33So, what do you guys want to do? Usually a whole day is taken up by the drinking.
11:38And the puking.
11:39The puking was implied, yes.
11:41I'm sure we can find something that we'll all enjoy.
11:46Isn't this awesome? What could be more fun than puzzling with my boys?
11:51So nice having you together in the same bubble.
11:56Oh, hey, Roberta. Look at you, all grown up.
11:59Bubble Roberta, you get back here.
12:01There's no age of consent in the bubble.
12:03Like all newly sober black men, I have taken to hustling chess in the park.
12:09I am a legend here.
12:12Checkmate.
12:14I suppose this was inevitable, as I did not know the horsey could jump.
12:20Now this is more like it.
12:22Drunk or sober, watching football with my boys will always be a blast.
12:26It's second down, three yards to go.
12:28This second down is brought to you by Casamigos Tequila.
12:31Casamigos, the tequila for guys who want to buy houses next to each other in Mexico.
12:36Hey, should we do that?
12:38No can do, Peter.
12:39I'm still underwater on two different timeshares in Panama City Beach.
12:43What? How?
12:44They said if I went to the timeshare presentation, they'd give me free Steve Harvey tickets.
12:49Well, how was the Steve Harvey show?
12:50Do you promise not to laugh?
12:52Of course.
12:52I got so excited about the concept of the flexible family vacation that I forgot to get the tickets.
13:01Are you sure you want to do this, Bri?
13:09Fox News has a history of twisting the truth to fit their agenda.
13:12Look, we may not agree on much, but at least I'll get some air time to speak my piece.
13:16All right, but if you get in trouble, just say Dominion three times.
13:19That's their candy man.
13:20We're on!
13:25Welcome to Hannity.
13:27Our guest tonight, Brian Griffin, has something important this nation needs to hear.
13:32Thanks for having me, Sean.
13:33I'd like to talk about books.
13:34And how the woke mind mob wants you to change them because the authors are white.
13:38But you stood up to the vermin in Chicago and said,
13:41No bueno, comrade Obama.
13:43What?
13:44Uh-oh.
13:44Brian's chyron says Freedom Crusader, and there's a photo over his shoulder of Hunter Biden's penis.
13:49I just want books to be left alone.
13:51This has nothing to do with the migrant crisis.
13:53You're right.
13:54It has everything to do with it.
13:56Think about it.
13:56When you go to the mall, what's the bookstore called?
13:59Borders.
14:00That chain closed like 15 years ago.
14:02Right.
14:03We should close the borders with chains.
14:05You get it.
14:05By the way, this is an open carry studio.
14:07Here's your gun.
14:08Ah!
14:09Dominion!
14:09Dominion!
14:10Dominion!
14:10Ah!
14:11Ah!
14:11Ah!
14:12Ah!
14:12Ah!
14:12Ah!
14:12Ah!
14:13Ah!
14:13Ah!
14:14Ah!
14:14Ah!
14:15Ah!
14:16Ah!
14:16Ah!
14:16Ah!
14:17Ah!
14:18Ah!
14:18Ah!
14:25Bok choy.
14:26That's a fun word to say.
14:28Bok choy.
14:30Yeah, that's fun, I guess.
14:34Garbanzo.
14:34Also fun to say.
14:35Not bok choy level, but pretty close.
14:38Yeah.
14:38Garbanzo's great.
14:40You know who makes a good napkin?
14:42Chinette.
14:44God, what happened to us?
14:45Now that we're sober, we don't got anything in common.
14:48And why would we?
14:49Our group is a fat guy, a black dude, a sex pest, and a wheelchair cuck.
14:53We make no sense together.
14:55I hate to say it, but I don't think we're cut out to be friends.
14:59Peter's right.
15:00Maybe we should just go our separate ways.
15:02Spend time with our families.
15:04Yeah, and I guess I gotta go see if I still have anything in common with other black people.
15:10They stopped midway because I said pickleball.
15:15As a newly sober person, I'm often going to ask if it's okay that I say what a nice time I'm having.
15:26I'd rather you didn't.
15:27Hey, can I just say what a nice time I'm having right now?
15:30Every time we do this, I wonder why we don't do it more.
15:32We're doing it now.
15:34Yes, but there should be more times of us doing it.
15:37Hey, you been hydrating, Lois?
15:38You gotta hydrate.
15:39It's the key to staying hydrated.
15:41Stop saying hydrated!
15:42Uh, Lois, you may want to go inside.
15:49Oh, hydrated!
15:56Hey, look!
15:57Did you see this?
15:59Your book, Faster Than the Speed of Love, is back on the shelves.
16:03Really?
16:03Nice!
16:04With a new forward by Ann Coulter.
16:06Less nice.
16:07And a very forward by Lauren Boebert.
16:10When I'm not rubbing my hand over a tented khaki, I'm curled up with a copy of Brian Griffin's excellent book.
16:16And does anyone know how Beetlejuice the musical ends?
16:19My book is being co-opted by the right.
16:21It's gross.
16:22And it's selling!
16:23It's number two on the neo-Nazi bestseller list, behind Ben Shapiro's Tyranny, How the Radical Left Made Me Bad at Sex.
16:30Hey, guys, good news.
16:35The seeds arrived.
16:36Everyone to the vegetable patch.
16:38What's going on?
16:39Peter, we have something we need to say to you.
16:42Please sit down.
16:43Okay.
16:45This is an intervention.
16:47But I already stopped drinking.
16:48This is to get you to start again.
16:51How dare you ambush me like this!
16:53I trusted you!
16:54And who's that guy?
16:55Well, we've never held an intervention before, so Jax is here to help.
16:59I was sober for years, Peter.
17:01It was hell.
17:02Every morning, I'd wake up at home and not in a bush.
17:05I stopped at red lights like a bitch.
17:07But through quitting therapy and shutting religion, I found the strength to drink again.
17:11And so can you!
17:13Peter, your children have written letters to tell you how your sobriety has affected them.
17:18Chris, go ahead.
17:20It's been 12 days since you took a swing at our crossing guard.
17:24You've stopped asking if I think I'm better than you.
17:27When I wrote this letter, I knew I would be the relative reading it to you from a straight-back chair.
17:35As opposed to a couch.
17:40This past week, I've had to spend more quality time with you.
17:45But you always say you want that!
17:46I want to say I want that, and I want you to come up short!
17:50I can't handle this right now.
17:51I need to hydrate.
17:53Just a little agua to take the edge off.
17:54No, no, no!
17:56You get it!
17:56You get it!
18:00You're right, okay?
18:01I can't keep not drinking like this.
18:04Shh, it's okay, baby.
18:06It's okay.
18:07You don't have to do this alone.
18:10Let's go get tanked.
18:12Together.
18:13So you're really going to pander to this extremist conference just to move some books?
18:28I can't believe you're selling out like this.
18:30I'm not selling out.
18:31I'm presenting my art in its rawest form.
18:34But this place is full of weirdos.
18:35They erected a gallows to hang barbies.
18:38And look at how they're opening the event.
18:39To honor our fallen insurrectionists, please observe a moment of violence.
18:51Don't forget to hit the cops we love.
18:56Thank you for your service.
18:57And now, I'll read an excerpt from my book, Faster Than the Speed of Love.
19:07Dig it!
19:07Cut his mic!
19:08We don't want to hear your racist book.
19:10We do.
19:11Let him read his racist book.
19:13It's not a racist book.
19:14The woke mob hates it.
19:16That means it's good.
19:17Republicans like it.
19:18That means it's bad.
19:20I can't believe it.
19:21Hey, back off!
19:22Everybody shut up!
19:26You wimps want to edit any book that hurts your precious feelings.
19:30And you freaks just want to ban books altogether.
19:32There are bigger problems in this world than some stupid book.
19:35Oh my God.
19:36The dog author is right.
19:37His book is stupid.
19:39But that's not what I meant.
19:40The first six pages are a description of a lake.
19:42The sex scene repeatedly uses the word honkers.
19:45There's a map at the front that doesn't pay off.
19:48Every sentence starts with and then.
19:50And then I'm a hack.
19:51We got it.
19:51You have brought us together, Brian Griffin.
19:54We've both agreed to ban just one book.
19:56Yours.
20:00Well, looks like everyone hates you again.
20:02Leaving you with just enough political infamy to do $5 birthday greetings on Cameo.
20:07Hey, Larry.
20:08Sorry Vanessa dumped you.
20:09So from one dog who s***ed the bed to another, happy birthday.
20:12That's hilarious, Joe.
20:23What is?
20:23I didn't do anything.
20:24Doesn't matter.
20:25The point is, we're all together again.
20:27But what about what you said before?
20:29That we have nothing in common.
20:30That beer is just hiding the truth.
20:32Yeah, but it's how you say it.
20:34Beer is hiding the truth.
20:36The truth of what guy friends are.
20:37A random assortment of dudes bound by booze.
20:42Peter Stewie swallowed a Tide Pod.
20:44We're headed to St. Christopher's.
20:46Come quickly and bring...
20:47To alcohol.
20:49It may tear families apart.
20:51But it brings friends together.
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