00:00This is your Justin Bieber roast by the numbers.
00:032. The number of Bieber venereal diseases confirmed by Ron Burgundy.
00:08This kid has spunk, moxie, and probably a few other STDs.
00:1357. The number of mints it took for someone to make this Selena Gomez joke.
00:18You're about to get f***ed harder than Orlando Bloom f*** Selena Gomez.
00:23She's definitely crying on the inside.
00:2650%. The rise in sales for Martha Stewart bed sheets after this.
00:31Ludicrous. You have three kids with three different women.
00:35May I suggest pulling out some time and finishing on some fine, highly absorbent Martha Stewart bed linens.
00:448. The number of years since Bieber posted his first YouTube video.
00:48Seems like only yesterday you were discovered on YouTube. Time flies when you're a piece of s***.
00:544. The number of people you can roast with just one joke.
00:57Kevin has a Napoleon complex.
00:59Uh, Kevin, Napoleon was the leader of France.
01:02Ludicrous France is in Europe.
01:05Justin, Europe's a continent.
01:08Shaq, a continent is not a free breakfast.
01:12And finally, 200 million. I'll let Justin take it from here.
01:17What do you get when you give a teenager 200 million dollars?
01:20A bunch of has-beens calling you a lesbian for two hours.
01:24Nice one, Justin. That should be on a popsicle stick.
01:2710.
01:2810.
01:2910.
01:3010.
01:3110.
01:3210.
01:3311.
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