00:00Sous-titrage Société Radio-Canada
00:30Hey, Merry Christmas. Whoa, you're on my naughty list.
00:36Good news, sir. More American kids believe in you than they do in vaccines or the Holocaust.
00:41That's great. I mean, disheartening for America, but great for us.
00:48I'm here from the North Pole Times.
00:50Have you decided who will succeed you with Santa Claus?
00:53Subtick, Santa's old and knocking on death's door? Fuck you.
00:56Uh, I mean, good question. I'll give it some serious thought. Ha-ha-ho-ho-ho. Bye.
01:03There have been many Santa Clauses throughout history.
01:07Some were loved, others loathed.
01:10But the position of Santa has mostly been a white man's game.
01:14Exactly. It's fucking crazy. Things have got to change.
01:18My advice to you is, whoa, if I die, get rid of my porn!
01:25I want to be the next Santa.
01:28If this is your dream, you have to at least make your case, bitch.
01:31You gotta get into that jolly bitch, bitch.
01:34I know you're right, but do you really have to call me bitch every time you say something?
01:38Yes, bitch, because it's empowering to call you bitch, bitch.
01:44Let's go over what we know.
01:46Santa and the board are all male and all white.
01:50They play golf, drink, smoke cigars, say things like, don't ever marry your mistress.
01:57Just so you know, the women of the North Pole make fun of one of your dicks.
02:01Have fun wondering whose it is.
02:02What I need to learn is how to throw out with these guys.
02:08You know, shoot the shit, do shots, shoot shots of shit.
02:13She has ideas, but can she really be the face of Christmas?
02:27I'll be named successor or die trying.
02:32Merry Christmas and to all a kick-ass night!
Commentaires